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00:00This is the story of the day I die.
00:14Just kidding.
00:15Come on, think it through.
00:17If I was dead, how could I be talking?
00:20Getting run over by the windmobile wasn't nearly as painful as it looked.
00:24But that might be on account of the fact that I could no longer feel anything below my waist.
00:30I should never have stopped for designer gasoline.
00:34I always loved diesel jeans.
00:37They got the best skinny fit.
00:39So I figured their gas would be skinny awesome too.
00:50But my car was allergic or something.
00:54So I got an Uber.
00:5545, 45, pull it out.
00:57Now you gotta go.
00:58And ended up getting paralyzed from the waist down.
01:06I was the girl who faked being in a wheelchair only to end up in a wheelchair for real.
01:12That wasn't karma.
01:13I don't know what was.
01:15I was thinking about it all night.
01:17None of it would have happened if it weren't for my mom.
01:19Oh, good.
01:21You're awake.
01:23I went to the cafeteria.
01:24I didn't know what you wanted, so...
01:26What I want is for you to leave.
01:28What?
01:28Do you need me to get you something else?
01:30I need you to get out and never speak to me again.
01:34Ever.
01:35Honey.
01:37You've been through a lot.
01:39But this isn't the time to push me away.
01:41I'm paralyzed because of you.
01:43What are you talking about?
01:45I wasn't driving that truck.
01:46Don't you get it?
01:47You made me lie about Bob, about being paralyzed.
01:50So God is punishing me for everything that you made me do.
01:53I never want to see you again.
01:56Ever.
01:57Fine.
01:58Bye.
01:59Bye.
01:59Bob.
02:09Hi.
02:11Coffee and a change of clothes as requested.
02:14I didn't realize Brick was here, too.
02:17All night.
02:18They still haven't told us anything about Dixie.
02:20Yeah, well, since I'm here, we need to talk about state.
02:24Now?
02:25Now that it's official, there's no time to spare.
02:27This is a game changer for both of us.
02:30We need to kick this up a notch.
02:32We need to find you a talent.
02:33We need highlights, a facial.
02:36I've already scheduled you for a teeth whitening this afternoon.
02:38Teeth whitening?
02:39Really?
02:39Dad, Dixie might not walk again.
02:41Dixie and her mother already pulled this scam,
02:43so excuse me if I'm not overwhelmed with compassion.
02:46You think she's lying?
02:47Only when her mouth is moving.
02:49Any updates?
02:50Nothing yet.
02:52How about you?
02:53My dad's still at the police station getting questioned.
02:55It'll be okay.
02:55You don't know that.
02:57Bob, you're a lawyer.
02:59Do you think he's going to jail?
03:02Yeah, I mean, it's possible.
03:04Oh, my God.
03:05Dad, you're not making things any better.
03:08Okay, all right.
03:09But I will see you later.
03:11Teeth, noon, at the mall.
03:13And we need to talk about whatever this is.
03:16If you want to win, you need to focus.
03:18No distractions.
03:20Troy, I am sorry that my dad's the worst.
03:26Don't say that.
03:27He didn't mean to...
03:28No, no.
03:28I know you think he's like a pageant Jesus or something,
03:32but you don't have to deal with him as a dad.
03:34I mean, Patty, sometimes I wish I was like you,
03:36and I just didn't know who my dad was.
03:39Brick.
03:40Seriously?
03:42You think having parents is difficult?
03:46Try not having them.
03:49Patty, I'm sorry.
03:50That is...
03:51You know what?
03:51Whatever.
03:52I'm going to go change.
03:55Patty.
03:58Brick and I had just gotten back together.
04:00We were already fighting.
04:02Maybe I was better off alone.
04:04The only problem was, when I was alone,
04:06all I wanted to do was eat.
04:09I was out of money,
04:11but I still needed more food.
04:13What the hell was I going to do?
04:15Meeting daily at 10.
04:17Someone else might have seen that 12-step sign as,
04:20well, a sign.
04:21But I saw something else.
04:23I didn't need a meeting.
04:44I needed something sweet to balance out the salty.
04:46But once I started, I couldn't stop.
04:55I ate because I was mad at Brick.
04:57I ate because I was mad at my mom.
05:00I ate because of Christian and Stella Rose.
05:04Because I was scared about state,
05:06and because I felt so guilty for eating.
05:08You did such a good job in there.
05:19You were so brave.
05:23You promised after Kimo I'd get a special donut.
05:26You will.
05:27They probably just didn't put them out yet.
05:30There we go.
05:33In the bed you are.
05:34Okay.
05:34I'm so proud of you, baby.
05:44I'm so proud of you, baby.
05:53I couldn't keep lying to myself about my food.
05:56I needed help.
05:57Now.
05:58But was this really the answer?
06:00I have tried the diets.
06:06Coming here was the last stop on the block.
06:09It wasn't enough to know the causes and conditions of my disease.
06:14I had to be willing to let them go.
06:16Causes and conditions?
06:18It was like a foreign country where they spoke another language.
06:21Maybe I was wrong.
06:23Maybe that sign wasn't a sign.
06:24But seeing D definitely was a sign.
06:29The only empty seat next to someone who hated me.
06:31I needed to leave.
06:39But that's the thing with foreign countries.
06:42The signs don't always mean what you think.
06:44What are you doing out here?
06:50Is Dixie okay?
06:51She's napping.
06:53What do you want?
06:54I came to offer support.
06:56Bullshit.
06:57Your daughter got hit by a truck.
06:59You'd find it hard to believe that I want to help?
07:01Yes.
07:02Your family hates me like I hate condoms.
07:06What do you want?
07:07Fine.
07:08So, I lost my investors from Ten Puzzle and you said you were going to be my biggest competition.
07:19So, I was thinking maybe we could team up.
07:21I knew it.
07:23You have some nerve showing up here trying to take advantage of my vulnerable position.
07:28Okay.
07:29Well, you're going to need money for Dixie's medical bills.
07:31Plus, it's going to be hard for you to launch a business on your own and you live in a box.
07:36I'm still the one with the businesses.
07:38You stole my prospectus.
07:40Well, you are an ex-con.
07:42Okay?
07:43Who nobody trusts.
07:44I can be the face of the business.
07:46I am already the face of my own successful business.
07:52Joke's on you, graffiti man.
07:54I suck from the left.
07:55Now, go bother someone else.
07:59Bye.
08:06Oh.
08:08What are you doing?
08:23Mother to mother.
08:26Your daughter's in the hospital.
08:28I'm not going to leave you alone.
08:30I'm not going to leave you alone.
08:38Oh, God.
08:39Oh, okay.
08:41Okay.
08:41Look, look.
08:42Is it...
08:42Soft?
08:43Yeah.
08:43Well, it's silk, okay?
08:44And you have a lot of makeup on, so...
08:46Oh, for fuck's sake.
08:49It must have been like that.
08:51No.
08:52It was not like that.
08:53No, it was like that.
08:55We've now come to the part of the meeting where we welcome newcomers.
08:58Will anybody new like to share about what got them to come here today?
09:03I didn't know what to say.
09:04Everyone was staring at me.
09:07What exactly was it that had brought me to this point?
09:10Was it Christian?
09:12Stella Rose?
09:14Nothing I could share.
09:15I had to say something.
09:18I sold donuts from Cancer Kids.
09:24It wasn't funny.
09:30Why were they laughing?
09:33I once stole Jell-O from a dead guy.
09:36I took all the candy from the AIDS one.
09:41They were laughing because they related.
09:44Could I have a long year after all?
09:45Now, sponsorship is a touchstone of our recovery.
09:50Sponsors are members of the program who share the experience, strength, and hope.
09:53Will all available sponsors please raise your hands?
09:57Stacey, recovering anorexia.
10:00Elizabeth, recovering food restrictor.
10:02Except I wasn't like them.
10:04I didn't throw up or starve.
10:07I just couldn't stop eating.
10:09D, recovering compulsive overeater, body obsessor.
10:12Compulsive overeater?
10:14Body obsessor?
10:16Was that me?
10:17If there was a name for it, maybe there was a cure.
10:21D, wait up.
10:23Uh, sorry, I got somewhere to be.
10:24Convulsive overeater, is that like binging, but without the throwing up?
10:28Because I thought you had to binge and purge for it to be an eating disorder.
10:31A lot of people think that, but it turns out there's no one right way to be fucked up about food.
10:36And body obsessor, what's that?
10:38Like it sounds.
10:39I used to spend hours staring at my body in the mirror, obsessing about the things I wanted to change.
10:44But I thought you were very like, I like myself, I love my body.
10:50Yeah, I got that way from going to meetings.
10:53So is this like a diet club?
10:55Because in AA you can just stop drinking, but you can't just stop eating.
10:59In my experience, it's not about the food.
11:01What are you talking about?
11:02Look, all I know is I don't have a food problem.
11:05I have a life problem.
11:07For me, the food is just a symptom that something else is going on.
11:10So is that what that woman meant about causes and conditions?
11:13Yeah.
11:14Look, it's a lot.
11:15But if you find a sponsor and work the steps...
11:17Will you be my sponsor?
11:18Fuck no.
11:19I mean, I don't think that's a good idea.
11:23Why not?
11:23You be me, like me.
11:25You obsess over your body.
11:27There are a lot of us in program.
11:28Find someone else.
11:29Didn't the leader say that sponsorship is like a touchstone of the deal?
11:34I don't know.
11:35Aren't you supposed to help me?
11:36Come on, I'll move my purse for you.
11:41Fine.
11:42I will be your temporary sponsor.
11:45You have a week to find someone else.
11:46Oh, great.
11:47A week is all I need.
11:48I heal fast.
11:49Like, if I don't wear earrings every day, the holes just close up.
11:51That's not how this works.
11:53Let's take this one day at a time.
11:56For starters, call me whenever you want to eat.
11:59That's, like, all the time.
12:00We need to help you figure out the difference between physical hunger and emotional hunger.
12:09Shit.
12:10I gotta go.
12:11Thank you, Jesus.
12:12Um, thank you.
12:14And I'll call you.
12:18It's time to fall.
12:21You got it all.
12:22Hi.
12:23I'm sorry.
12:24I'm late.
12:24You need to take prepping for state seriously, Patty.
12:27This is your future, what you're talking about.
12:29I know.
12:29I've lost track of time.
12:31Were you with Brick?
12:32Because I can't have you dragging my son into your drama.
12:34No, I was not Brick.
12:36I...
12:37I went to my first Overeaters Anonymous meeting.
12:43You did?
12:45Yeah.
12:46I think...
12:48You're right.
12:49I think that I have a problem.
12:52Patty, this is huge.
12:54I am so proud of you.
12:55Well, I'm here now, right?
13:02And I'm focused, and I'm totally ready to win.
13:05Let's do this.
13:06Maybe let's pump the brakes on the pageant stuff.
13:10You know, just till you find your footing in recovery.
13:13But you said there's no time to spare, right?
13:16You said state is a game changer.
13:18You getting healthy is the most important game changer of all.
13:22And I would hate to put any more pressure on you.
13:25Why has Dixie texted me?
13:27Well, Dixie?
13:28Is she okay?
13:29Yeah, I don't know.
13:31I guess I'm about to find out she wants to see me.
13:34Is it okay if I still do this?
13:36Uh, yeah, if you want to.
13:38I mean, I can't get a refund on the Groupon.
13:40But most importantly, focus on your recovery.
13:44I'm really proud of you.
13:46And, you know, it's been a long time of knowing
13:50that something is off, and I never knew it was a problem.
13:53What?
13:53Now that I go in there, and I know, like,
13:55this is a group of people who are just like me.
13:57It's a thing.
13:59I can't.
14:00There's not a chance.
14:01It has stayed with me.
14:02What?
14:03I'll text you.
14:04That would be great.
14:06Magnolia, I'm heading that.
14:07What are you doing?
14:08Turn that off.
14:09What?
14:10If you have any chance of getting your memory back,
14:13the doctors insisted on 100% brain rest.
14:16It's just Bird Box.
14:18Isn't that the same?
14:19No.
14:19No.
14:20No screens.
14:21No iPads.
14:22No phone.
14:23No TV.
14:23But sitting here is so boring.
14:26So you'd rather just self-sabotage again?
14:29What are you talking about?
14:30Your lab results came back.
14:31Your blood alcohol level was 0.1.
14:33I told you, I don't remember drinking.
14:35You being blacked out doesn't make me feel any better.
14:39The doctor also said my memory loss could be tied to me seeing something traumatic.
14:45Like, what if I saw what happened to Roxy and now I can't remember?
14:50I'm not self-sabotaging, Dad.
14:55I'm just trying to distract myself from thinking about the fact that I could have had a sister,
15:00but I pushed her away and now she's dead.
15:02Baby, I'm so sorry.
15:05Hey.
15:08Okay.
15:09Hey, come on.
15:10Of course.
15:11Of course, this is just as hard for you.
15:15Now, look, I have an appointment at the police station.
15:19I'm gonna get an update on Roxy.
15:22Now, you wanna call one of your friends, have them come sit with you while I'm gone?
15:25I literally have no one to call.
15:28That's what makes this even worse.
15:29I needed her and I didn't even know.
15:33Has a single person visited or even called?
15:38When did I ever have friends over?
15:41When I wasn't studying, I was all pageants all the time,
15:44except for when I was with Brick.
15:50Well, then I'm calling Brick.
15:53Where's Regina?
15:54Who gives a shit?
15:55She's dead to me.
15:57Wow.
15:59And you are paralyzed, like for real this time?
16:04Yes.
16:05Oh, you don't believe me?
16:07I'll prove it.
16:09Oh, God, Dixie.
16:11Oh.
16:12What?
16:12I didn't feel a thing.
16:16Here, you try.
16:20Why did you text me?
16:22Well, I have been up all night thinking.
16:24And I had an episiotomy.
16:28I hope you mean epiphany.
16:30Everything bad that ever happened to me started back when my mama made me lie about you.
16:35I never won another pageant.
16:37I got thrown off the weanmobile.
16:40I lost my home.
16:41I had to leave town.
16:43You have had a bad run.
16:44I'm starting to think that this is all karma, which means that I've got to clean up my mistakes.
16:50Starting with you.
16:52I figure that by working together again, well, that's a good start.
16:55You want to get back into pageants?
16:58No.
16:58I want you to be my lawyer.
17:01I want to sue the shit out of Herman Short.
17:04I'll split whatever we win.
17:0650, 60.
17:09There wasn't enough money in the world to risk getting involved with Dixie again.
17:13And I'm pretty sure in a case like this, we're talking several million dollars.
17:18Except it turns out, there was.
17:26What's up?
17:27Well, I just had my teeth whitened and they told me I can't eat for three hours, so obviously
17:31all I can think about is good.
17:32I mean, what's going on emotionally?
17:35I don't have anything to do today.
17:37And I am afraid if I'm alone, I'll just want to eat, so.
17:42So don't be alone.
17:43Listen, I'm picking up Nani for a date, so.
17:45Oh, great.
17:47Can I come with you?
17:48She'll be stoked we're friends now.
17:49We're not friends.
17:50I'm your sponsor.
17:51Your temporary sponsor.
17:53And Nani doesn't know I'm in the program yet.
17:55And I ain't ready to tell her.
17:57Here she is.
17:58I gotta go.
17:58Bye.
17:59Who's that?
18:01Oh, nobody.
18:02Don't worry about it.
18:03How cute are you?
18:05I don't know.
18:07How cute am I?
18:09Very.
18:10Ooh.
18:12Thanks for coming over.
18:13I know it's like super awkward having to babysit your ex-girlfriend.
18:16No, not at all.
18:17Just because we broke up doesn't mean I still don't care about you.
18:22But you're with Patty now again, right?
18:26Yeah.
18:27How's that going?
18:29Good.
18:29You know, except we got in a fight this morning, so I think she's kind of mad at me.
18:36Wait, is this weird for you to talk about?
18:39Not at all.
18:39Okay, that's weird.
18:44She's gone.
18:45Do you mind?
18:45Do you mind?
18:46Not at all.
18:49Hey, beautiful.
18:50Hey.
18:50I'm sorry for getting so mad earlier at the hospital.
18:54I had low blood sugar and...
18:56Uh, don't worry about it.
18:57You okay?
18:57Uh, I will be, if we can hang out or make out or anything out.
19:04Well, I'm kind of with Magnolia.
19:06Wow.
19:08We have one weird moment and you run to your ex?
19:11No.
19:12Her dad called me and asked to keep an eye on her because she's on brain rest.
19:15I guess the only way she might remember what happened to her is to, you know, let her brain
19:18heal and relax.
19:19Oh, shit.
19:21What if Magnolia remembered seeing me hit Christian?
19:24How's that going?
19:25Has she remembered anything?
19:27No, not yet.
19:28Um, okay, well, how long will you be there?
19:30Should I come hang out with you guys?
19:32No, by the time you get here, I'll probably be gone.
19:34I'll text you when I leave.
19:35Okay.
19:39I was terrified to be alone.
19:41But even more terrified that there was a man lurking outside my house.
19:45Was he trying to break in?
19:47Or, oh, God, what if Stella Rose sent him?
19:51What if he was here to even the score?
19:52Hey, there.
19:54Fuck you!
19:55Who the fuck are you?
19:56I'm calling the police.
19:57Don't!
19:58Don't!
19:58I'm in front of your mom.
20:00Bullshit!
20:02I swear, here.
20:04I have pictures of her using my code.
20:06It's 1111.
20:08All ones?
20:09How dumb are you?
20:12Oh, shit.
20:14Sorry.
20:16Do you have any, uh, milk?
20:18It helps with the mace.
20:20Sure, yeah.
20:20How do you know that?
20:23We can talk about it when my eyes aren't melting.
20:25Yeah, yeah, yeah.
20:27It's gonna be this way.
20:28All right.
20:29Watch the sticks.
20:30Watch the sticks.
20:31Feet, feet.
20:34Here you go.
20:36Thanks.
20:39Why do you look familiar?
20:40Maybe your mom showed you pictures of us.
20:42Yeah, you're her ex-boyfriend.
20:44She reached out to you around my birthday.
20:45Exactly.
20:46I came to your party.
20:48We just didn't get a chance to meet.
20:50You did?
20:51Yeah.
20:52I got picked up by the cops for drugs.
20:55Then your mom stole my car.
20:57Well, it's a tale as old as time.
20:59But, you know what?
21:00I was a different person back then.
21:03So?
21:04Why did you come back?
21:06Got out on bail.
21:07I was hoping to get my car back.
21:09It's not here.
21:10Neither is my mom.
21:11But she took off that same night.
21:13Wow.
21:15She thought I'd be a bad influence on you.
21:18What do you mean?
21:20She didn't want me to meet you.
21:22I mean, maybe she was right.
21:24I made some bad choices.
21:26But you're all grown up.
21:29And here we are.
21:30And she's not around.
21:31I'm confused.
21:32Why would she care if I met you?
21:36Because I'm your father.
21:41I'm your father.
21:41I'm your father.
21:42I'm your father.
21:43I'm your father.
21:43I'm your father.
21:47Where's Detective Cruz?
21:49I have an appointment.
21:50He had an out-of-town lead to follow.
21:52About what?
21:53I can neither confirm nor deny the details of an active murder investigation.
21:58So it's about Roxy.
22:00It's okay.
22:01You can tell me.
22:02I'm entitled to know I used to be the D.A.
22:05I used to be the manager of frigging Chuck E. Cheese.
22:08But that doesn't mean I can still go down there and eat free pizza in the ball pit, does it?
22:14Yeah, well, maybe I'll get my old job back.
22:17Good.
22:17Do it.
22:18But for now, get out of my way.
22:21I'm late to stake out Patty Bledell.
22:24She's still a suspect?
22:26No.
22:28I mean, I never said that.
22:30You stay out of my head.
22:32I felt like I couldn't ask questions fast enough.
22:35Everything I ever wanted to know about my dad.
22:38What part of his face was like mine?
22:40His eyes?
22:41His chin?
22:43Did he accidentally kill someone, too?
22:46Would he forgive me if he knew I did?
22:48I just can't believe my mom was lying to me all these years, saying she didn't know who my dad was.
23:01Well, I can't believe that I'm here with you right now.
23:06I mean, I missed everything.
23:08Your first day of school, teaching you how to ride a bike.
23:11Okay, uh, my first day of kindergarten, I threw up Count Dracula on Tracy Plank, and I still don't know how to ride a bike, so you're all cut up.
23:24She found I was really blown up.
23:25That's worth it.
23:26We can't wait.
23:27You are way more important.
23:31Should we try to text my mom?
23:33I haven't been able to reach her, but maybe we could get a hold of her.
23:36Yeah.
23:37Yeah.
23:38That, yeah, that's...
23:41You know what, though?
23:43She might...
23:44She might be upset.
23:47And I would have to leave, and then you and I would get to know each other.
23:53How do I know that you're telling the truth?
23:56About being my dad?
23:59Well, um...
24:01How about I go to a drugstore and pick up a paternity test?
24:05Right now?
24:06Well, I mean, you don't have to leave so soon.
24:08No, it's fine.
24:09I'll, uh, I'll be back with that test before you even know it.
24:12If he was lying, there's no way he'd offer to get a test.
24:16Could I have finally found what I had been looking for my entire life?
24:20Hey, sorry.
24:31Relax.
24:32It's just been a slight wrinkle.
24:34I couldn't get the car.
24:37Chill.
24:37Look at the money I owe you for my daughter.
24:42Is it weird that the Choi's lawyer moved the mediation up to today?
24:45No, this is a very good sign.
24:48My guess is they're running scared.
24:50You are a pageant girl in a wheelchair.
24:53That is a very expensive sympathy card.
24:55Fuck sympathy.
24:57I make seven figures a year, I split my time between three cities,
25:00and I get more dick than I know what to do with,
25:03so cry me a fucking river.
25:05I think you're my new hero.
25:08I'm Dixie Sinclair.
25:09Don't care.
25:09You're the genius who picked this dipshit to represent you.
25:12The dipshit has a name?
25:14Bob Armstrong?
25:15Again, don't care.
25:17Buckle up, Buttercup.
25:18I'm about to wipe the floor with your middle-aged, worn-out ass.
25:21Think again.
25:22Your client ran over my client while she was crossing the street in full view.
25:29Did you actually inspect the crime scene?
25:32I was there when it happened.
25:35Well, then surely you'll know that there was no crosswalk,
25:38which means your client was not walking.
25:41She was jaywalking.
25:43So congrats, little girl.
25:44The last thing you did with your legs was break the law.
25:48Wait.
25:49I don't get any money?
25:51If you sue him.
25:52Me?
25:53Remind me, who pulled permits for that event?
25:57Well, me.
25:58Yeah, rhetorical, dickless.
25:59So if your client wants to get a payout for gross negligence,
26:03she ought to go after you for planning an event with zero safety in mind.
26:07I am sorry I'm late, folks.
26:09We ready to get started?
26:11I need to confer with my client.
26:14Wait.
26:14What's happening?
26:15Where's my money?
26:16Where's my money?
26:16Is it in there?
26:18Where's my...
26:18Hey!
26:19Where's my...
26:20Where's the chance if I get a chance?
26:22Oh, my God.
26:22Please don't sue me.
26:23I've been living in my office.
26:24It's not your fault.
26:26I broke the rules crossed in the street.
26:29I broke the rules my entire life.
26:32Oh, Dixie, don't.
26:34Maybe my karma's invisible.
26:37Maybe...
26:37Maybe I deserve to be paralyzed.
26:43Alone.
26:44Feeling guilty for the rest of my life.
26:49Was it possible?
26:51Had that lion, dead-legged she-devil actually changed?
26:55Maybe this was about more than money.
26:56Maybe I could change my karma, too.
26:59Maybe I could change my karma, too.
26:59Maybe I could change my karma, too.
27:26Maybe I could change my karma, too.
27:27Maybe I could change my karma and my affairs with me.
27:29Like...
27:35Did I
27:49arlos...
27:50Do I have anything on my teeth?
28:00You're so weird.
28:05Gotta grab this.
28:06Give me a sec.
28:07Patty B, is that...
28:10You okay?
28:11I'm hungry again.
28:12Okay.
28:13What's going on?
28:14I met my dad the first time ever.
28:18This is the last time I talked to you?
28:19Yeah.
28:19I feel like more things happen to me than most people.
28:22How was it?
28:23Intense.
28:24Weird.
28:25All my life I wanted to know who he was.
28:28You think that's the reason I wanted to eat?
28:30Because I never knew who my dad was?
28:32Could be part of it.
28:33Maybe this is the universe finally giving me the thing that I actually needed instead of food.
28:38Patty, slow down.
28:39It's usually not just one thing.
28:41I mean, the whole time he was here, I didn't even think about food.
28:43And now he's gone, all I want to do is eat.
28:45Of course.
28:46I'm sure it's very emotional and...
28:48Holy shit.
28:50If I have my dad, I won't want to binge.
28:51I'm cured.
28:52Patty, stop.
28:53You can't just swap out one thing for another.
28:55This is amazing.
28:56Thank you, Dee.
28:58You're not listening.
29:01Fucking annoying.
29:02Why is Patty calling you?
29:17Patty?
29:18Patty?
29:18Yes.
29:19My best friend.
29:21The one you hate.
29:22Patty B.
29:24It's...
29:24It was nothing.
29:27Nothing.
29:27Kind of like your secret phone call earlier.
29:31You're acting like I'm cheating on you or something.
29:33I'm not saying you're cheating.
29:35I...
29:36Are you cheating?
29:38This is...
29:39This is crazy.
29:39Seriously?
29:40You're gonna keep secrets from me and then call me crazy for feeling insecure?
29:45They're not secrets.
29:46Not everything is your business.
29:49Got it.
29:51Nani, wait.
29:52I...
29:52Call me when you're ready to be honest.
30:05It's Dee.
30:06Call me back ASAP.
30:08Sorry I've been radio silent.
30:10Things have gotten complicated and I don't think I can keep lying like this.
30:19Thank you so much for staying with me today.
30:21And we're going on a wine run.
30:24You want a refill or...
30:25Uh, sure.
30:27So, do you think that Dixie is still napping?
30:30Maybe you should go, um, check on her and, I don't know, say, be a mom?
30:35Maybe.
30:37The truth is, she kicked me out.
30:40She thinks I'm a bad person.
30:43Which...
30:44I probably am.
30:46No one knows that better than you.
30:49I'm so sorry about all that.
30:51Oh, thank you, Regina.
30:54If it makes you feel any better, you raised a wonderful son.
31:00Generous.
31:02Gentle.
31:03Tender.
31:04Okay, okay.
31:05You could have just stopped at the apology.
31:07Please.
31:08Selfless.
31:08Okay, I got, I got the picture.
31:11I...
31:11I can't get it out of my head.
31:14You know, I think in another life, you and I could have been friends.
31:21Well, this is what I'm talking about.
31:23We still could be.
31:25I mean, maybe this whole Tampazzle thing could actually work.
31:28Pooza!
31:29Pazzle!
31:29Poo!
31:29Poo!
31:30Poo!
31:30Poo!
31:30Poo!
31:31Poo!
31:31Poo!
31:31Poo!
31:31Poo!
31:32Poo!
31:32Poo!
31:32Poo!
31:32Poo!
31:33Poo!
31:33Poo!
31:33Poo!
31:33Hi!
31:34Oh, hi, Bob!
31:35Hi!
31:35What are you doing here?
31:36I was, uh, for Dixie.
31:38Aw.
31:39I feel like since she stayed with me, she's kind of one of my daughters.
31:43I never did thank you for that.
31:45I'm not sure you should.
31:48I've got one daughter dead and another in trouble.
31:51Now this, like I can't keep anyone safe.
31:53I just feel so powerless.
31:56Oh, Bob.
31:58When I feel that way, one thing always helps.
32:03Pure Colombian Coke.
32:06A couple rails of that.
32:07Oh, there is nothing you can't do.
32:09What? Regina?
32:10I punched out a pit bull and pulled down a street sign on that shit.
32:14Regina, I'm sorry.
32:15Would you please give us a moment?
32:17Oh, yeah, sure, of course.
32:20Call me tomorrow.
32:21We'll work out the tampoosal details.
32:23Bye, Bob.
32:24Bye.
32:26What in the world is she talking about?
32:28Oh, it doesn't matter.
32:29Let's talk about you.
32:31I tried to get my old DA job back.
32:34Figured I could be in charge of the investigation.
32:37Right, that's a great idea.
32:38Except they already filled it.
32:40I can't just sit around.
32:43Wait a minute.
32:44Do you know what you should do?
32:46You should run for mayor.
32:49Right?
32:50I mean, you only backed out before because of Bob.
32:52And we all know how that turned out.
32:54And I would have more access to Roxie's case.
32:57Right.
32:58And you don't have potential to make a real difference.
33:01I mean, you could make Masonville safe again.
33:04Yeah.
33:04You could build a wall.
33:06You know what?
33:08With Etta Mae, everything was always about her.
33:11But you, you make me feel like I can do anything.
33:15Yeah.
33:16You're like Jackie O to my JFK.
33:18Oh.
33:20If JFK were a power bottom.
33:22Jackie O had no gag reflex.
33:24It's true.
33:29The more I thought about my dad, the less I thought about food.
33:37So, I decided to focus on finding out as much about him as I could.
33:43If he had pictures with my mom on his phone, she probably had some old ones of him too.
33:47Weird.
33:52My mom looked way younger than she was when I was born.
34:03What were these?
34:05Restraining orders?
34:06Against my dad?
34:08Why would my grandma have filed them on my mom's behalf?
34:11I had spent 18 years being jealous of every girl who had a dad.
34:21And now I had my very first text from mine.
34:26Whatever this was about, maybe there was an explanation.
34:36Badge 314 arriving at the Bledel house.
34:39Looks like she's home.
34:40Copy 314.
34:47I was surprised for you.
34:51It may be a little late.
34:53But I want to teach my daughter how to ride a bike.
34:56Hop on.
34:57Screw the restraining orders.
34:59Whatever they were about, that was then.
35:02And this was now.
35:03And right now,
35:05my dad,
35:06I finally felt full.
35:10I had spent hours trying to find something to help Dixie.
35:13There had to be something I missed.
35:17This is your brand new glasses prescription.
35:20It was found in the glove box of the Weenmobile.
35:23Want to tell me why you haven't filled it yet?
35:25I don't have a restricted license.
35:27Which is why I called your optometrist.
35:30You can do that?
35:30She said it strong enough that you should have been wearing them
35:33at the time of the accident
35:34and that she'd be happy to testify to that.
35:38Dad, seriously?
35:40I...
35:40I was wearing my old glasses.
35:44The doctor never told me that I had to.
35:45So you had no responsibility for what happened to Dixie?
35:49You're 100% sure you wouldn't have seen her
35:52if you had been wearing your new prescription.
35:59What have I done?
36:04I could have brought that information right to the judge,
36:07taken them for everything they were worth.
36:09But he had a family.
36:10And I had a soft spot for Donald Choi.
36:13I didn't want that karma.
36:16And...
36:17Dixie, you are now the proud owner of the Wiener Taco.
36:22I'm so sorry, Dixie.
36:23I should sue you for going directly to my client.
36:26Go ahead and try it.
36:27But to win what?
36:28The loose change in my dryer is worth more than you.
36:32Does this mean you're my boss now?
36:35Sure does.
36:39That's when it hit me.
36:40I won.
36:42But now what?
36:49Hi.
36:53I saw how freaked out you looked
36:55when you were signing those papers.
36:59No one knows better than me what you're going through.
37:02A chair, a new life.
37:05You're terrified.
37:08It's just...
37:09Where will I live?
37:13Who's going to help me get in and out of bed?
37:15What if there are stairs and I...
37:16Well, what if there's a zombie apocalypse?
37:19What if both Hemsworth brothers want to fuck me
37:21and I can only pick one?
37:23What if?
37:23What if?
37:25You'll live and you'll learn.
37:28From who?
37:30I don't have anyone.
37:31I'm all alone.
37:32You're not alone.
37:34There are lots of us.
37:36I promise...
37:38we'll hook you up.
37:41Maybe this was karma,
37:43but that didn't mean it had to be a bad thing.
37:45Especially since...
37:47I wasn't alone.
37:48We'll be singing.
37:52Yeah, no, you've got to pedal, pedal, pedal.
37:54Alright, now I got it.
37:55Go!
37:55Go for it.
37:56Now you got it.
37:56I get knocked out!
37:58Lock it up again!
38:00Go!
38:00I get knocked out!
38:01Go!
38:02I get knocked out!
38:06Yeah, I'm really good.
38:06Can I hop back in there?
38:08Yeah?
38:08Yeah, you got it.
38:10You got it.
38:11Yeah, I'm gonna whip around this bed, Dad.
38:16Look at me.
38:17Look at me.
38:18I'm nailing it.
38:20I'm like Drew Barrymore's brother in E.T. Phone Home.
38:24I'm so proud of you, Patty.
38:27Honestly, I'm kind of proud of myself.
38:31For the first time in a long time.
38:33Why's that?
38:34Um, you know how you were saying you made some bad choices?
38:38Uh-huh.
38:39I made some, too.
38:41A lot, actually.
38:43Must run on our DNA.
38:45Yeah, I, uh, have a confession to make.
38:49You...
38:50You do?
38:52This bike?
38:54I stole it.
38:55Wait, what?
38:56You said you didn't know how to ride.
38:57I thought, well, that's one thing I can do.
39:00But you didn't have to...
39:01No, I did.
39:02Because, uh...
39:05After today, I don't know when I'll see you again.
39:10What?
39:10What do you mean?
39:12We finally found each other.
39:15It's those damn bad choices.
39:18But I still owe some bad people money from a long time ago.
39:23It's the reason I needed my car back from your mom, so I could sell it.
39:26But now I run out of patience.
39:31Well, I'm not losing you over money.
39:34I can give you some.
39:36I, uh, I have some scholarship money.
39:39You won out of regionals.
39:40I can't take that from...
39:42How'd you know about regionals?
39:45What?
39:46Regionals.
39:46How did you know that that's where I won the money?
39:49Well, I was, uh, on your mom's Facebook page and...
39:53And what?
39:55Is that what this was?
39:57Why you pretended to care?
39:59It was for money?
40:00Oh, I do care.
40:01Are you even my dad?
40:02Of course I am.
40:04I even bought the paternity test.
40:06I have it all up with my things.
40:09What are these?
40:12Look at you.
40:13Just waiting to spring that on me.
40:15Why would my grandma not want you around my mom?
40:20Shoot.
40:26Because we were having sex.
40:29You and my grandma?
40:32Well, yeah, first.
40:36Then Angie came sniffing around.
40:37She was very mature for her age.
40:39You molested your girlfriend's daughter?
40:42Well, she came on to me.
40:44Oh, my God, you are sick.
40:46Oh, really?
40:47Because when Angie grew up, she came back begging for more.
40:50And that is how you were conceived.
40:52It was worse than I could have ever imagined.
40:55He wasn't my solution.
40:57He was the problem.
40:59You're my causes and conditions.
41:00What the fuck are you talking about?
41:04Step one.
41:06We admitted we were powerless.
41:08You destroyed my mother.
41:10You are the reason that she's so fucked up.
41:12Step two.
41:13Cain to believe.
41:15You are why she drank and why she slept with all those men.
41:19Three.
41:20Made a decision.
41:21You are why she couldn't show up for me.
41:24Step four.
41:25And why she keeps leaving me.
41:27Five.
41:28Which means you are the reason I am the way that I am.
41:31Six.
41:32Seven.
41:33Eight.
41:34You are why I am so angry.
41:36Nine.
41:37You are why I am so fucking broken.
41:40Ten.
41:40You are the reason I eat.
41:42Eleven.
41:43And you are why it is never enough.
41:46And you are why I have this unfillable hole.
41:51Finally.
41:52Step twelve.
41:53Look, look.
41:54Whoa.
41:56If he was my causes and conditions, could I really just let him go?
42:00Another dead body?
42:16Was it my fault?
42:18It wasn't my fault.
42:20It couldn't have been my fault.
42:21Patty, hey.
42:33Hey.
42:35You sound good.
42:37Oh, yeah.
42:38I'm great.
42:39I had a big win today.
42:41Turns out Dixie wanted me to represent her and I won her the wiener taco.
42:45I mean, this is going to be a great year, Patty.
42:49You are in recovery.
42:51I am turning over a new leaf.
42:53We're leaving all the drama behind.
42:56That's great.
42:59I just called to see what Dixie wanted.
43:02I'll call you later.
43:03Bye.
43:03Okay.
43:04Bye.
43:04Bye.
43:04Bye.
43:04Bye.
43:04Bye.
43:04Bye.
43:04Bye.
43:15And suddenly, all I could think about was food.
43:39I couldn't call D, couldn't call Nani, couldn't call Brick, so I peddled as fast as I could
43:49to a meeting.
43:51You know what they say, we're only as sick as our secrets.
43:56D was right.
43:57I didn't have a food problem.
43:59I had a death problem.
44:01Bye.
44:09Bye.
44:10Bye.
44:11Bye.
44:37Bye.
44:38Bye.
44:38Bye.
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