- 5 months ago
Unexpected Fatherhood is a lighthearted 1971 comedy that follows a confirmed bachelor whose carefree life takes a sudden turn when he discovers he has a teenage son he never knew existed. As the two navigate their new relationship, hilarious misunderstandings, heartfelt moments, and unexpected lessons unfold. This charming film blends witty humor with touching family themes, offering a nostalgic glimpse into the comedic style of the early ’70s.
Category
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00I was born on a cold, cold morning in Georgia
00:00:04I was born on a cold, cold morning, no matter where you are
00:00:13I learned to be careful when I was a little girl
00:00:17I was a poor man's daughter in a poor man's world
00:00:21Now I'm trying to raise a child in Georgia
00:00:26Trying to raise a child in Georgia
00:00:29I learned to be careful when I was a little girl
00:00:33I was a poor man's daughter in a poor man's world
00:00:53Now I'm trying to raise a child in Georgia
00:00:57Sweet, sweet, my dog, yeah, I won't cry
00:01:03It would have worked if he'd say
00:01:06I'd go alone, you know the name
00:01:08But he was moving on
00:01:10Bye-bye, baby, bye-bye, baby, bye-bye
00:01:18Sweet, sweet, my dog
00:01:22Bye-bye, baby, bye-bye, baby, bye-bye
00:01:28Sweet, my dog, yeah, I was a child
00:01:32Another place, another man, another thing
00:01:36Another Bible, bye-bye
00:01:38She came out from West Montana
00:01:46Riding the train for free, no money
00:01:49I crippled on just a panorama
00:01:53Spilled out for four miles for honey
00:01:56I was only trying to get to someone I love
00:02:04You know, I think every divorced guy in this town
00:02:33Must live in this building
00:02:34Uh-huh, well, I'm not divorced
00:02:37How did you avoid that?
00:02:39Oh, that was easy, I never got married
00:02:41Never thought about it?
00:02:45Well, I thought about it, yes
00:02:47But
00:02:48I just haven't found
00:02:52The right girl
00:02:54Yet
00:02:58Or have I
00:03:08It's a key tree
00:03:23Would you, uh, care for a drink?
00:03:45Let's wait till later
00:03:46Oh, till later, yes
00:03:47What?
00:04:01Uh, are you Mr. John Gaines?
00:04:04What?
00:04:04Are you Mr. John Gaines?
00:04:07Yes, I'm Mr. John Gaines
00:04:08What do you want?
00:04:09I have to see you
00:04:10You have to see me
00:04:11Uh, just take me a second
00:04:14What?
00:04:17Are you Mr. John Gaines?
00:04:19Yes
00:04:20Mr. Gaines, I think you're my father
00:04:23What did you say?
00:04:28I said, I think you're my father
00:04:29I think you've been smoking something
00:04:32Boy, they are really out tonight
00:04:36I'll tell you
00:04:37I got a nut out here
00:04:37Who says he thinks I'm his father
00:04:39Oh, boy, his father
00:04:40I could be his father
00:04:41Like he could be your father
00:04:42You're old enough to be my father
00:04:45I'm old enough to be your father?
00:04:47Why don't you go out and join him?
00:04:48I'm only 37 years old
00:04:50So, my father's only 36
00:04:53How old are you?
00:04:56Sixteen
00:04:56Sixteen?
00:05:03Sixteen?
00:05:06Why, why do you dress like him?
00:05:08Why do you dress like this?
00:05:10Trying to look 17
00:05:12Oh, no
00:05:13Oh, no, you don't
00:05:14No, here's your purse
00:05:15And here's your shawl
00:05:15What's the matter?
00:05:17Nothing
00:05:17I just don't want to spend the summer
00:05:18In San Quentin
00:05:19That's all
00:05:19I'd be delighted to drive you home
00:05:21Well, if that's the way you feel about it
00:05:22I'll walk
00:05:23Swell
00:05:23Oh, it's you
00:05:26I'd like you to meet you
00:05:27You two should be very happy
00:05:29Is something wrong with him?
00:05:33I hope not
00:05:34I think he's my father
00:05:37Well, I guess he's no worse than mine
00:05:41It's three o'clock in the morning
00:05:52Go away
00:05:53Yeah, but I came 600 miles to see you
00:05:55Go 600 miles back
00:05:58Can't you give me just a minute?
00:06:00You have one minute
00:06:05I don't know where to start
00:06:08You're wasting pressure seconds
00:06:10Look
00:06:12Don't you recognize me?
00:06:15I'm your son
00:06:15Time's up
00:06:17Wait a minute
00:06:18You're my father
00:06:19I'm nobody's father
00:06:21You are my father
00:06:23I'm nobody's father
00:06:26Now, will you please leave?
00:06:31That's a very nice picture
00:06:32Looks like me
00:06:32It's you in your army uniform
00:06:35I was not in the army
00:06:37I was in the AMA
00:06:38What?
00:06:41Arizona Military Academy
00:06:42I had to go there because of my asthma
00:06:44That girl looks familiar
00:06:47That's my mother
00:06:49Mother?
00:06:50She's very pretty, Lenny
00:06:51Your mother
00:06:57Is this a joke?
00:07:06No
00:07:07What's your name?
00:07:13John Gaines, Jr.
00:07:17Call me BJ
00:07:18I had nothing to do this with you
00:07:21Again, so I thought I'd come out
00:07:22And see the Pacific Ocean
00:07:23And look you up
00:07:25Not really interested, are you?
00:07:30No, I just need time to think
00:07:31That's all
00:07:33This is incredible
00:07:35This is incredible
00:07:37That's the only word I can think of right now
00:07:41Yeah, well, I won't waste any more of your time
00:07:45Where are you going to go?
00:07:47What does that mean?
00:07:48I mean, where are you going to stay tonight?
00:07:51Do you have a place to stay tonight?
00:07:52No, I haven't found one yet
00:07:54You want to stay here
00:08:00Tonight?
00:08:03Okay
00:08:05Hungry?
00:08:09Yeah, a little
00:08:14Now, this is like a miracle
00:08:16What is?
00:08:18Well, you're not being dead and all
00:08:35Dead?
00:08:36Well, Mom had always told me that your plane crashed in Korea
00:08:39Huh?
00:08:40But Aunt Florence, you remember Aunt Florence, Mom's sister
00:08:43Well, she said that wasn't true
00:08:45So, I've decided to come out and see for myself
00:08:48Did it or didn't it?
00:08:52Did it or didn't it, but?
00:08:54Your plane
00:08:55Crash in Korea
00:08:56No
00:08:59Didn't crash
00:09:00No
00:09:01No
00:09:02But you were a war hero
00:09:04No
00:09:06Well, anyway, you were in Korea
00:09:10No
00:09:11No, I told you I had asthma
00:09:13No
00:09:13No, I told you I had asthma
00:09:15No
00:09:17No
00:09:18No
00:09:19No
00:09:20No
00:09:21No
00:09:22No
00:09:23No
00:09:24No
00:09:25No
00:09:26No
00:09:27No
00:09:28No
00:09:29No
00:09:30No
00:09:34No
00:09:35No
00:09:35No
00:09:36By clothes
00:09:44Good morning
00:09:47Good morning
00:09:48Oh, good morning
00:09:54Why are you all dressed up?
00:09:56It's Sunday
00:10:00Well, this is Los Angeles. We're very informal here.
00:10:05Oh, I know we get dressed up on special occasions, like weddings, funerals, things like that.
00:10:09But just to knock around on a Sunday, I think blue jeans would be just fine.
00:10:13What about church?
00:10:16Well, I guess the people who go to church get dressed up.
00:10:20Don't you go to church?
00:10:21No.
00:10:22Never?
00:10:23No.
00:10:25Why not?
00:10:27I just don't.
00:10:29Don't get me wrong, though.
00:10:30I mean, if you want to, uh, get up early on a Sunday morning, get all dressed up and go inside a church when the sun is outside, you should do it.
00:10:44Emma?
00:10:46Uh, hi, Mother. Uh, look, just hang on a second, will you please?
00:10:51Yeah, well, wait, wait, wait one moment.
00:10:54Yes, uh, all right, Mother.
00:11:05No, no, when was it?
00:11:09Uh-huh.
00:11:11Mother, I feel fine.
00:11:14I do, I feel fine, Mother.
00:11:17Edie.
00:11:17Edie didn't say a word to me.
00:11:24Well, thank you, Mother, but I am perfectly capable of making my own breakfast plans.
00:11:32Mother.
00:11:34Oh, Mother.
00:11:38Mother, may I call you back in a few minutes?
00:11:40Yes.
00:11:42I have something important I have to do.
00:11:44Yeah.
00:11:45Yeah, all right.
00:11:47Yes.
00:11:48Yes, Mother.
00:11:50All right.
00:11:51Yes, Mother, goodbye.
00:11:52Yes.
00:11:52Yes, Mother, goodbye.
00:11:54Ah.
00:11:57Oh.
00:11:58Oh, no, no, no.
00:12:04Oh, no, no, no.
00:12:05Oh, no, no, no, no.
00:12:06Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:12:07Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:12:08Well, here you are, sir.
00:12:11Sure you don't want to come in with me?
00:12:13No, some other time.
00:12:15Maybe.
00:12:16Maybe not.
00:12:17Hi, Johnny.
00:12:18What are you doing up so early?
00:12:20Hi, Janie.
00:12:21Janie.
00:12:22Girl, I know.
00:12:23Which reminds me.
00:12:24Listen, if we run into any more people today,
00:12:26why don't I just introduce you as...
00:12:29as B.J.
00:12:31Van S.
00:12:41B.J. Van S., an out-of-town buyer.
00:12:44What's the matter with my real name?
00:12:46Well, nothing.
00:12:47It's just that, well, big cities are like small towns.
00:12:52They're even worse, you know,
00:12:54and people are liable to talk, you know.
00:12:58Yeah, okay.
00:13:00But if you came to Arizona,
00:13:01I'd want people to know that you were my father.
00:13:04Yeah, well, uh, how long do you think you'll be in there?
00:13:08About an hour.
00:13:10Good, good.
00:13:13Well, enjoy the matinee.
00:13:30Who is it?
00:13:31Who's there?
00:13:32Johnny!
00:13:33Come on in.
00:13:34What are you doing here so early?
00:13:35I was in your neighborhood.
00:13:36Why didn't you call?
00:13:37You pulled myself together.
00:13:38Oh, cut it out.
00:13:39Now, have I ever complained about the way you look in the morning?
00:13:40No.
00:13:41Never have, no.
00:13:42Edie.
00:13:43Hmm.
00:13:44Hmm.
00:13:45Edie, I, um...
00:13:46Hmm.
00:13:47I have a little favor that I would like to ask of you.
00:13:49Hmm.
00:13:50And I would really appreciate it if you didn't ask me to explain.
00:13:51All right?
00:13:52All right.
00:13:53All right.
00:13:54All right.
00:13:55All right.
00:13:56Edie, I, um...
00:13:57Hmm.
00:13:58I have a little favor that I would like to ask of you.
00:14:02Hmm.
00:14:03And I would really appreciate it if you didn't ask me to explain.
00:14:06All right?
00:14:07All right.
00:14:08All right.
00:14:09All right.
00:14:10Edie.
00:14:11What?
00:14:12I would like you...
00:14:16to call my mother.
00:14:18Oh, my mother.
00:14:19Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:14:20Yeah, and explain to her, please, that what...
00:14:24that we will not be able to join them for breakfast today.
00:14:28Oh, why not?
00:14:30Edie, I asked you not to make me explain, please.
00:14:35Oh, is there anything I can do?
00:14:38No.
00:14:39No, nothing.
00:14:40Well, anything.
00:14:41No.
00:14:42No.
00:14:43No, everything is under control, and by sundown tonight,
00:14:46it'll be gone.
00:14:48Well, you may not have seen the Pacific Ocean,
00:14:51but I would say that it's the end of an almost perfect day.
00:14:55Yeah, that's right.
00:14:56It's a perfect day.
00:14:57Hungry?
00:14:58A little.
00:14:59Okay, I'll tell you what.
00:15:00Why don't we go buy my apartment, and we'll pack up your things,
00:15:03and then we can go to a great restaurant,
00:15:06and have dinner before we go to the bus depot.
00:15:09Why do we have to go to the bus depot?
00:15:11Why?
00:15:12Well, certainly you have to go back to school,
00:15:14to your family.
00:15:15I mean...
00:15:16What family?
00:15:17What family?
00:15:18What do you mean, what family?
00:15:19Your mother.
00:15:20I know she must miss you.
00:15:21Your mother's dead.
00:15:22We better last Wednesday.
00:15:23The only other family I have is Aunt Lawrence.
00:15:26Well, what about her?
00:15:27She's a nun.
00:15:28She's a nun.
00:15:29Oh, no.
00:15:30No.
00:15:31No.
00:15:32No.
00:15:33No.
00:15:34No.
00:15:35No.
00:15:36No.
00:15:37No.
00:15:38No.
00:15:39No.
00:15:40No.
00:15:41No.
00:15:42No.
00:15:43No.
00:15:44No.
00:15:45No.
00:15:46No.
00:15:47No.
00:15:48I might as well stay here with you.
00:15:56Oh, hi, Ben.
00:15:57This is Johnny.
00:15:58Listen, may I talk to you this morning?
00:16:00Yes, it's very important.
00:16:01As a matter of fact, it's a matter of life and death.
00:16:04No, seriously, I mean life and death.
00:16:07I think I have a real problem with my hands this time.
00:16:10Yeah?
00:16:11Well, since you're coming in for the meeting at 10,
00:16:13would you mind coming in at 2?
00:16:14Well, since you're coming in for the meeting at 10,
00:16:15would you mind coming in at 9 so we could talk?
00:16:18Oh, that's great.
00:16:20Oh, fine.
00:16:22I appreciate it.
00:16:23Okay, I'll see you soon.
00:16:24Bye-bye.
00:16:27Oh, good morning.
00:16:28Sleep well?
00:16:29Yeah, fine.
00:16:30Hey, you want me to fix breakfast this morning?
00:16:31No, no, you go ahead and fix breakfast for yourself,
00:16:33but don't leave here and wait until I call you.
00:16:36I have to go to work and keep the wolves away from our door.
00:16:39All right, by the way, what do you do?
00:16:41What do I do about what?
00:16:42You know, are you a deep-sea diver, lawyer, test pilot, demolition expert?
00:16:47I sell dresses.
00:17:12Johnny?
00:17:17Who's there?
00:17:19Who's there?
00:17:19Johnny, is that you?
00:17:21Uh, no, I'm not Johnny.
00:17:22I'm a friend of Johnny.
00:17:22My name's BJ.
00:17:23Oh, hi, I'm Rhonda.
00:17:24Hi.
00:17:24I didn't know anybody would be home.
00:17:25I just came by to pick up my interview dress.
00:17:27I'm reading for a cat food commercial this afternoon.
00:17:29Gee, that's very interesting.
00:17:30Uh, look, I'm a little pressed for time, and I don't want to put you out.
00:17:32Is it okay if I come in there with you for a minute?
00:17:33I don't know anybody would be home.
00:17:34I don't know anybody would be home.
00:17:35I just came by to pick up my interview dress.
00:17:36I'm reading for a cat food commercial this afternoon.
00:17:38Gee, that's very interesting.
00:17:39Uh, look, I'm a little pressed for time, and I don't want to put you out.
00:17:41Is it okay if I come in there with you for a few minutes?
00:17:43Come in here?
00:17:44Yeah.
00:17:45No, you can't do that.
00:17:46Why not?
00:17:47Why?
00:17:48Because there's no more hot water.
00:17:50You sure don't sound like a friend of Johnny.
00:17:52After all, I wasn't going to hurt you.
00:17:53I didn't know anybody would be home.
00:17:54I just came by to pick up my interview dress.
00:17:56I'm reading for a cat food commercial this afternoon.
00:17:58Gee, that's very interesting.
00:17:59Look, I'm a little pressed for time, and I don't want to put you out.
00:18:01Is it okay if I come in there with you for a few minutes?
00:18:04Come in here?
00:18:05Yes.
00:18:06No, you can't do that.
00:18:07Why not?
00:18:08I wasn't going to hurt you.
00:18:12You're sure not very friendly.
00:18:14Oh, um, well, we've only just met.
00:18:18We're like total strangers.
00:18:31I just love kitty tum yums.
00:18:34What?
00:18:35I just love kitty tum yums.
00:18:37That's the voice I'm going to be using.
00:18:40I was supposed to be a cat.
00:18:42Oh, that, that's very interesting.
00:18:48Do you live here?
00:18:50Nope.
00:18:51You just come here to pick up your clothes and take showers?
00:18:54Yep.
00:19:10Hmm.
00:19:12She's either very tall or very un-chic.
00:19:16I don't know.
00:19:28I don't know if she's bad.
00:19:32I don't know.
00:19:34Yeah.
00:19:36Hey, you better see us something.
00:19:39Oh, no, I'm sorry.
00:19:42Good morning, Harriman.
00:19:43I've got something on my mind.
00:19:45Tears of the world, eh?
00:19:51Oh, no, I'm sorry.
00:19:53Good morning, Harriman.
00:19:54I've got something on my mind.
00:19:56Tears of the world, eh?
00:20:06Hi.
00:20:09Hi.
00:20:10Is Begelman here?
00:20:11No, but he's in the building.
00:20:13How are you?
00:20:15A little frantic, that's all right.
00:20:17I felt so good seeing you yesterday.
00:20:20Sweetheart, come on.
00:20:21Not with the door open and not in the office, okay?
00:20:24Answer that, would you please?
00:20:29Yes.
00:20:30Oh, yes, yes, he is.
00:20:31Uh, okay.
00:20:33The boss wants to see you.
00:20:35How about that?
00:20:37I haven't been in the building but two minutes.
00:20:46He's in?
00:20:47He's in.
00:20:56You wanted to see me?
00:20:57Yeah, I hope you didn't forget about tonight.
00:20:59Tonight?
00:21:00What about tonight?
00:21:01Dinner at the club.
00:21:03I forgot.
00:21:04You were supposed to ask Edie to go with you.
00:21:07Dad, I told you.
00:21:08I forgot.
00:21:09It's all right.
00:21:10I asked her for you.
00:21:11You asked her for me?
00:21:13Dad, I am a big boy now.
00:21:15I can make my own dates, thank you.
00:21:17As a matter of fact, I happen to already have a date for tonight.
00:21:20So cancel it.
00:21:21It's not a terrible tragedy.
00:21:23I haven't got time to argue.
00:21:25I pay for your time, sir.
00:21:26Don't tell me when you'll have time.
00:21:28And I work very hard for that pay and you know it.
00:21:31I know you work very hard.
00:21:32Why shouldn't you?
00:21:33This whole thing will be yours someday.
00:21:35After all, I don't plan to live forever.
00:21:41Hi, lover.
00:21:42Hello, mom.
00:21:43Mother.
00:21:44Mother.
00:21:45Mother.
00:21:46Are you and Edie having dinner with us at the club tonight?
00:21:49She sure is.
00:21:50Oh, good.
00:21:51After all, you missed breakfast with us yesterday.
00:21:53Yes.
00:21:54I love you.
00:21:55Hi.
00:21:57Hello.
00:21:58Let me see your suit.
00:21:59Yeah, yeah.
00:22:00Oh, smart.
00:22:01Yeah, okay.
00:22:02Love it.
00:22:03Ben Beigelman is waiting in your office.
00:22:05Something wrong?
00:22:06Why should something be wrong?
00:22:07Why are you dealing directly with a company lawyer?
00:22:09It's just something that's wrong with my car, Daddy.
00:22:11What do you mean wrong with your car, dear?
00:22:13It's no life for a boy running around like that.
00:22:19You have to do something, Al.
00:22:21What do you want me to do?
00:22:22Well, for one thing, I want you to do everything you can to keep those two together.
00:22:26She's the perfect girl for him.
00:22:28She comes from a nice family.
00:22:29She's not too independent or too smart.
00:22:33I'm telling you, if one of those sharp cookies gets a hold of him, I will never forgive you, Al.
00:22:38Ethel, what more can I do?
00:22:40Johnny needs a secretary like I need a pants presser.
00:22:43You ask me to put her on, I put her on.
00:22:45She gets $144 a week plus fringe benefits.
00:22:48She can't type, she can't take shorthand.
00:22:50Well, why should she have to type or take shorthand?
00:22:53She'll be left a bundle when Herb dies.
00:22:55Please, don't rush him.
00:22:57He's a year younger than I am.
00:22:59Well, I am so worried that Johnny will meet the wrong kind of girl.
00:23:05Especially since he's not living at home anymore.
00:23:08It was that raise you gave him.
00:23:10You told me to give him a raise.
00:23:12You said give him enough money so he won't quit but not enough to get him in trouble.
00:23:16Hmm.
00:23:17Ethel, you're driving me crazy.
00:23:18What do you want from the boy?
00:23:20I want him to be happily married.
00:23:23Just like you, Al.
00:23:25Well, is that so terrible?
00:23:29Ben, I don't know where to start.
00:23:36Well, how about starting with Once Upon a Time?
00:23:39Oh, come on now, Ben, I mean it.
00:23:41I don't know if this began last Saturday or last Saturday 18 years ago.
00:23:46Look, Johnny, why don't you just sit down and tell me all about it?
00:23:49All right.
00:23:50Well, Once Upon a Time.
00:23:53Is he in there?
00:23:55Yes.
00:23:56How are you, honey?
00:23:59Is he paying any more attention to you?
00:24:02Well, I...
00:24:04You know, I was thinking, just between us girls,
00:24:08maybe a padded bride or a bride or a bride or a bride.
00:24:13You know, I was thinking, just between us girls,
00:24:16maybe a padded bra wouldn't hurt.
00:24:20You know, something that would...
00:24:23You know...
00:24:26And if you like, I'll get you the afternoon off,
00:24:29and I'll take you to Carlos, and he'll do your hair just like mine.
00:24:32Johnny would love that.
00:24:34Um, I... I... I appreciate it.
00:24:38But I don't think it's necessary, Mrs. Gaines.
00:24:41Mrs. Gaines?
00:24:45You call me Ethel.
00:24:48And please God, one day it'll be Mother.
00:24:53Get me the registrar at the Hall of Records in...
00:24:56Coltville, Arizona.
00:24:59Coltville, Arizona.
00:25:00Yes, sir.
00:25:02Go ahead, Johnny.
00:25:04All right.
00:25:06So...
00:25:08Anyhow, I horse him around town.
00:25:10You know, show him the city.
00:25:12And then, Ben...
00:25:14He tells me he is going to stay here.
00:25:18Now, legally, what are my responsibilities?
00:25:20Well, let's check the records first.
00:25:23But I'm not thinking legally right now.
00:25:26I'm thinking about what people will say.
00:25:29Please don't.
00:25:31I'm thinking about two people in particular.
00:25:33Your father and your mother.
00:25:35Your father and your father.
00:25:36Now, Al, I'm sure, once he adjusts to the idea...
00:25:39Well, he might like it.
00:25:41But Ethel...
00:25:43She thinks she's a young woman, Johnny.
00:25:48And she thinks you're her little boy.
00:25:50Now, what would happen if suddenly...
00:25:52No, don't, don't finish, Ben.
00:25:54Just tell me, what do I do?
00:25:56First thing you do is relax.
00:26:01Mr. Beegleman.
00:26:02Coldfield, Arizona, on line number three.
00:26:06Hello, sir.
00:26:07I wonder if I might get you to check...
00:26:09The birth registration file for me.
00:26:11Uh, yes.
00:26:13Uh, 1953-54.
00:26:16Mother, Lois Kelly.
00:26:19It was a son.
00:26:21Right, now, hold on.
00:26:25You know, if worse comes to worst...
00:26:27You'll live.
00:26:28After all, you're not the first guy in the world...
00:26:30To become a father.
00:26:31What kind of an answer is that, Ben?
00:26:32I mean, what kind of an answer is that?
00:26:33Most people who become fathers...
00:26:34At least they get married first.
00:26:35They wait nine months to have a baby, Ben.
00:26:36And then it's about that size...
00:26:37Somewhere in there.
00:26:38And then it grows, and it grows...
00:26:39And it grows, and it grows...
00:26:40And you change all those diapers, Ben.
00:26:41And then when it finally gets somewhere...
00:26:42In this area...
00:26:43You're taking a baby, Ben.
00:26:44And then it's about that size...
00:26:45Somewhere in there.
00:26:46And then it grows, and it grows...
00:26:47And you change all those diapers, Ben.
00:26:48And then you take it somewhere...
00:26:49In this area.
00:26:50You take it to the pony park...
00:26:51And you take it to the Little League games...
00:26:52And you buy it a Boy Scout uniform.
00:26:54And then after all that time, Ben...
00:26:57After all those adjustments...
00:27:00Then...
00:27:02You get someone the size of B.J.
00:27:05Yes, yes, I'm still waiting.
00:27:11You know, that's not gonna help.
00:27:13All expectant fathers do it.
00:27:15Uh, yes.
00:27:17Yes?
00:27:18Yes, that's right.
00:27:19Lois Kelly.
00:27:20So what's the name of the father...
00:27:22On the certificate?
00:27:26Thank you very much.
00:27:30Well?
00:27:32Congratulations.
00:27:33You've just had a baby boy.
00:27:36Have I?
00:27:37The father's name on the certificate...
00:27:38Is John Gaines.
00:28:02Johnny.
00:28:03Johnny, is something the matter?
00:28:04Are you sick?
00:28:05No, I'm...
00:28:06Fine.
00:28:07Is there anything I can do?
00:28:08Yes.
00:28:09Order me a box of cigars.
00:28:10Yes.
00:28:11Order me a box of cigars.
00:28:23I've been driving by this place...
00:28:26I imagine most of my life.
00:28:28And if you hadn't yelled...
00:28:30I'd probably still be driving by this place most of my life.
00:28:34Well, when you asked me if I was hungry...
00:28:36I suddenly realized I hadn't had good Mexican food in about three days.
00:28:39Good Mexican food.
00:28:40Did you like it?
00:28:42Well, um...
00:28:43Yeah, it's all right.
00:28:44You know, but...
00:28:45You know, it just...
00:28:46Well, it sort of all tastes the same to me.
00:28:47Really?
00:28:48Yeah.
00:28:53You put cream in your chili?
00:28:57Yeah.
00:28:59That's how my mother used to make it.
00:29:03What was she like?
00:29:06What do you mean?
00:29:09Well, I mean...
00:29:11Was she nice?
00:29:13Of course she was nice.
00:29:14She has to have been a redhead, right?
00:29:15I mean, she has to have been.
00:29:17You don't even remember her, do you?
00:29:22No, not very well.
00:29:33How long did you know her?
00:29:36A week.
00:29:38Or maybe two weeks.
00:29:47You weren't married, were you?
00:29:49No.
00:29:51You sure?
00:29:53Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm...
00:29:55I'm sure.
00:29:58Well...
00:30:00I guess we know what that makes me.
00:30:03Oh, well...
00:30:05Come on, now.
00:30:06This is today, you know.
00:30:07No one...
00:30:09Thinks about that anymore.
00:30:10No one cares.
00:30:12You didn't know about me, did you?
00:30:18What would you have done if you'd known?
00:30:24I don't know.
00:30:26You really put cream in your chili.
00:30:28Yeah, you want some?
00:30:29No.
00:30:30No, no, no.
00:30:31My mother never did that to me.
00:30:33Your mother, is your mother still a...
00:30:34Oh, yes.
00:30:35Oh, is she ever?
00:30:36Oh.
00:30:37How about your dad?
00:30:38Oh, he...
00:30:39Both of them, both of them.
00:30:40Just going so strong.
00:30:41Grandparents.
00:30:42Wow.
00:30:43When do I get to meet them?
00:30:45Oh, that'd be a problem.
00:30:46Yes, that...
00:30:47Well, yes, that would definitely be a problem.
00:30:48Particularly at this time.
00:30:49But, um...
00:30:50Speaking of problems, I'll tell you.
00:30:52I have one and you really could sort of help me out with it...
00:30:53if you'd like to meet them.
00:30:54Oh, yes.
00:30:55Oh, yes.
00:30:56Oh, yes.
00:30:57Oh, yes.
00:30:58Oh, yes.
00:30:59Oh, yes.
00:31:00Oh, yes.
00:31:01Oh, yes.
00:31:02Oh, yes.
00:31:03Oh, yes.
00:31:04Oh, yes.
00:31:05Oh, yes.
00:31:06Oh, yes.
00:31:07Oh, yes.
00:31:08Oh, yes.
00:31:09Oh, yes.
00:31:10How do I get my drink?
00:31:11Oh, yes.
00:31:12I can help me out with it, if you don't mind.
00:31:13Huh?
00:31:14I mean, it's nothing difficult, you know.
00:31:15It's very simple.
00:31:16You see, I...
00:31:19I managed to get myself into the position of having...
00:31:22two dates tonight.
00:31:24So if you could just, um...
00:31:27sort of help me by taking one off my hands just for a little while.
00:31:30What's your name?
00:31:31Edie.
00:31:33Isn't she a little older than me?
00:31:35Well...
00:31:37Yeah, you know, but I can tell her that you're 25 years old,
00:31:42and she'll never know the difference, you know.
00:31:46Well, uh, didn't Edie expect to spend the evening with you?
00:31:53Yeah, but it doesn't really matter, you know.
00:31:56It's okay.
00:31:58Have you dated her before?
00:32:00Yeah, I...
00:32:01And you don't mind me taking your girl out?
00:32:06Hey!
00:32:07What are fathers for?
00:32:08Oh, my God.
00:32:09Oh, my God.
00:32:12Come on.
00:32:13Are you sure this is going to be all right?
00:32:15Come on.
00:32:40Are you sure this is going to be all right?
00:32:41It's going to be just fine.
00:32:42I told you, she's an employee.
00:32:44She's my secretary, and the only reason she got the job is because her parents met my parents
00:32:50a year ago on a Caribbean cruise.
00:32:51That's all good.
00:32:52Well, what if she doesn't like this?
00:32:53She will like you.
00:32:54Will you relax?
00:32:55Come on.
00:33:03This always makes her mad.
00:33:04Fine.
00:33:11Come on in.
00:33:12Now, do you open your door to just anybody?
00:33:14No.
00:33:15Just anybody doesn't put his finger over the people.
00:33:17Mm-hmm.
00:33:18See, I told you so.
00:33:20All right.
00:33:20Come on in.
00:33:25Well, um, Edie, B.J., B.J., Edie.
00:33:32Hi.
00:33:33All right, now.
00:33:36I've done much on drinking.
00:33:37Well, just, just a small one, you know, to, uh, to get your motor started.
00:33:40Why don't you two just sit down and, uh, get acquainted.
00:33:44Uh, hi, B.J.
00:33:56Hi.
00:33:57Nice to know you.
00:33:58Nice to know you.
00:33:59Okay, we're acquainted, now, uh, would you please tell me what's going on?
00:34:04Nothing.
00:34:05Nothing.
00:34:06Nothing.
00:34:07Where are you from, B.J.?
00:34:08Arizona.
00:34:09Been in town long?
00:34:10No, no, not long at all.
00:34:13Planning on staying?
00:34:14Uh, yeah.
00:34:15This is my home now.
00:34:16Ah, well, come on.
00:34:17How about a nice, quiet little drink?
00:34:19Hmm?
00:34:20I mean, after all, we could all, we could all talk later.
00:34:34Oh, no, no, wait a minute.
00:34:35Are we all going to be together later?
00:34:37Well, first, a quiet drink.
00:34:38All right?
00:34:39Now, I would like to propose a toast, so, uh, I shall propose a toast.
00:34:46Uh, here we go.
00:34:48Here's to...
00:34:49Here's to a nice, quiet drink.
00:34:51Yes.
00:34:52I'll drink to that.
00:34:53Well.
00:34:54Well, that's good.
00:34:55That's a good one.
00:34:57Ah.
00:34:58How do you like it?
00:35:01Not much.
00:35:02Not much?
00:35:03Oh, well, it just takes a while for the taste buds to adjust, that's all.
00:35:07You see, uh, after the first one, well, the, the second martine just sort of, well,
00:35:17it just sort of slides down.
00:35:20Heh.
00:35:29Well?
00:35:30Fine.
00:35:31Uh-huh.
00:35:32Uh-huh.
00:35:33Yes.
00:35:34Well, I suppose it does take a little time to, uh, adjust to martinis, right, Edie?
00:35:38Right, right.
00:35:39Now, look, shouldn't we be leaving?
00:35:41Oh, yes.
00:35:42Well, there has been a small change in plans, just a small change.
00:35:47Well, Edie, I already had a date for tonight.
00:35:51Now, uh, that was before Dad called and told me that all the families intended to get together,
00:35:55you know, and all that.
00:35:56So, I thought the best of all possible worlds would be for me to, uh, uh, to go with you
00:36:02to the club.
00:36:03And, and then, uh, when we're through doing our do's, uh, I'll, I'll come back with you,
00:36:07leave you with, with B.J., and you can spend some time together.
00:36:10And, and while I take my date, you see, I couldn't reach her on the phone.
00:36:13So, uh, I, at least take her home, and then I'll come back and, uh, and I'll pick up, uh, B.J.
00:36:20B.J.?
00:36:25B.J., you all right?
00:36:27Oh, I never felt better.
00:36:29Good.
00:36:30Good.
00:36:31All right.
00:36:32I'll, I'll tell you what.
00:36:33I will be back in three and a half minutes, so don't anybody run away.
00:36:35Okay.
00:36:43Hi, Edie.
00:36:50Are you here, Edie?
00:36:51What do you have?
00:36:52Lot's mind, things are moving a little fast.
00:36:56Mmm.
00:37:00Something the matter?
00:37:05Edie!
00:37:07Open it up.
00:37:12Edie wasçoit both, I think I'm going to be sick.
00:37:14Oh, all right.
00:37:15Just, just give me a second.
00:37:18Can you hear me?
00:37:19You okay?
00:37:25Oh, wait, let me get you over here to the couch.
00:37:29And I'll get you some coffee.
00:37:31Oh, no, no, no, no coffee.
00:37:33Yes, yes, yes.
00:37:34Now, just sit down there.
00:37:35I'll be right back.
00:37:42Now, take it easy.
00:37:44Look, you'll be all right in a few minutes.
00:37:46Uh, look.
00:37:49Oh.
00:37:51One thing you should never do, and that is to take a drink on an empty stomach.
00:38:00Okay?
00:38:01Is it true about you and him?
00:38:03Is what true?
00:38:05No.
00:38:07He told you that.
00:38:10He told me an awful lot.
00:38:12I don't believe it.
00:38:15Do you love him?
00:38:17Look, why don't we...
00:38:18Why don't we talk about you for a change?
00:38:21Okay.
00:38:22How old are you?
00:38:24I am 25.
00:38:26Just turned 24.
00:38:30I'd say 19.
00:38:33Hmm.
00:38:34Not quite 18.
00:38:36Well, what did he have on his mind?
00:38:38Why, I mean, how did he find you?
00:38:40Oh, he didn't find me.
00:38:41I found him.
00:38:42He's my father.
00:38:43What?
00:38:44He's my father.
00:38:45Well, he didn't know about me.
00:38:47If I hadn't come out here to look him up...
00:38:49Good evening.
00:38:50Good evening.
00:38:51Good evening.
00:38:52Good evening.
00:38:53Hey, some bad.
00:38:54Malta Groovy.
00:38:55Uh-huh.
00:38:56Uh, that's Rhonda.
00:38:57Uh, Rhonda, this is Edie.
00:38:58Greetings, Edie.
00:38:59I'm sorry.
00:39:00I'm sorry.
00:39:01I'm sorry.
00:39:02He didn't know about me.
00:39:04He didn't know about me.
00:39:05If I hadn't come out here to look him up.
00:39:06Good evening.
00:39:07Good evening.
00:39:08Good evening.
00:39:09Good evening.
00:39:10Good evening.
00:39:11Hey, some bad.
00:39:12Malta Groovy.
00:39:13Uh, that's Rhonda.
00:39:14Rhonda, this is Edie.
00:39:15Greetings, Edie.
00:39:16Ah, and that's... that's V.J. on the couch over there.
00:39:20Hello again.
00:39:21Hello again?
00:39:22Oh, I met V.J. this afternoon, when I stopped by your apartment to pick up my dress.
00:39:25Huh.
00:39:26Oh, I... I... I had a sample of 22C over at my place.
00:39:29Look, Edie.
00:39:30Uh, I met V.J. this afternoon, when I stopped by your apartment to pick up my dress.
00:39:31Huh.
00:39:32Oh, I... I had a sample of 22C over at my place.
00:39:34Look, Edie, uh, I had a sample of 22C over at my place.
00:39:39Oh, I had a sample of 22C over at my place.
00:39:42Look, Edie, I think it would be best if we took your car for the two of us,
00:39:46and I'll give my car to BJ, and they can easily...
00:39:48I don't think BJ is going to be in any shape to do anything tonight.
00:39:51Besides, I want to have a little talk with you.
00:39:54Talk?
00:39:54Look, will you two make yourselves at home?
00:39:56We're going for a little walk.
00:40:05Look, Johnny, I can't tell you what to do.
00:40:07You're a grown man.
00:40:10This is between you and him.
00:40:13What does he want?
00:40:14What does he want?
00:40:15He wants to live with me.
00:40:18Live with me.
00:40:19Now, what are my parents going to say?
00:40:20Oh, what difference does it make?
00:40:22What difference does it make?
00:40:24You know how they're going to feel about being late at that stupid dinner tonight.
00:40:28So how are they going to feel about a good answer?
00:40:29The stupid dinner happens to be because my mother and father came down from San Francisco,
00:40:34and your mother, your mother, made a decision that we should get the whole family together.
00:40:39The whole family.
00:40:41Well, what do they expect of us?
00:40:43I mean, the whole thing is so ridiculous.
00:40:45All right.
00:40:55Don't worry about it.
00:40:57I'll explain it to them.
00:40:59That'll be my job.
00:41:01You go back in there and pick up BJ, and that's your job.
00:41:05And I'll call them at the club.
00:41:08Oh, yeah, but, Edie, you...
00:41:09You won't say anything.
00:41:13No, no, no, no.
00:41:18That'll be for you to do.
00:41:26Edie, you're a nice lady.
00:41:30Yes, I am.
00:41:41I'm hungry.
00:41:41Edie, where are they?
00:41:43Oh, they probably just stopped off for a little lovemaking.
00:41:47Ethel, what are you saying?
00:41:48You're such a stick in the mud.
00:41:51I had a little talk with Edie this afternoon.
00:41:53I told her some things a boy like Johnny would like to hear.
00:41:57Ethel.
00:41:58Al, these things just don't happen by themselves.
00:42:01They have to be managed.
00:42:04Telephone, Mr. King.
00:42:05Oh, thank you.
00:42:07Hello.
00:42:07Oh, hello, Edie.
00:42:10Where are you?
00:42:10We're starving here.
00:42:11Is she all right?
00:42:12If she's with Johnny, she's all right.
00:42:15Oh, I see.
00:42:16No, no, it's okay.
00:42:18No, no, no, it's all right, honey.
00:42:19It's all right.
00:42:23Well?
00:42:24We'll order now.
00:42:28Well?
00:42:28Well, Johnny had something else to do, and Edie didn't want to come over alone.
00:42:35That's all?
00:42:36That's all.
00:42:37If I didn't know Edie any better, I'd think she was crying.
00:42:40Oh, nonsense.
00:42:41They're together.
00:42:42They probably just stopped somewhere for a little lovemaking.
00:42:45Ethel.
00:42:47They've both been together in the office for the past six months right under my nose.
00:42:52Believe me, there's no lovemaking going on.
00:42:55So he's still young.
00:42:56What's the hurry?
00:42:58Al, it's not like we've known each other for 30 years.
00:43:01A year ago, I wouldn't have known you for madam, but I just feel that...
00:43:06Never mind.
00:43:09What do you mean, never mind?
00:43:10What?
00:43:10It's nothing, nothing.
00:43:12What do you mean, nothing, nothing?
00:43:13There's something on your mind.
00:43:16Well, not every guy wants to settle down and get married these days.
00:43:19That's all.
00:43:21Not every guy wants to settle down and get married.
00:43:23Big deal.
00:43:24Well, I think there was something else.
00:43:27Go on.
00:43:27Tell him, Herb.
00:43:29Well, yes, Herb.
00:43:30Go ahead.
00:43:31Tell him.
00:43:33Yeah.
00:43:33Tell me.
00:43:37Well, there's some guys that just don't like girls, you know.
00:43:40Don't like...
00:43:41Oh!
00:43:45You think Johnny doesn't like girls.
00:43:48I'm not talking about Johnny necessarily, and I'm not talking about anybody in particular.
00:43:54But there are a lot of guys around.
00:43:56Well, like Rose's cousin.
00:43:57Reroy, the interior decorator.
00:44:00And Sausalita.
00:44:01Yeah, well, what has he got to do with this?
00:44:03He's got a very nice business.
00:44:05He makes 50 or 60 a year.
00:44:07The women just love what he can do to a room.
00:44:10He's as happy as a clam.
00:44:12He lives in this big Victorian house in Half Moon Bay.
00:44:23Well, it's 11 o'clock.
00:44:28Tell me, have you seen enough of the Pacific Ocean now?
00:44:33Yes, I do.
00:44:34Good, fine.
00:44:35Now, what would you like to do?
00:44:38I, uh...
00:44:40I'd like to talk.
00:44:44About what?
00:44:46About us.
00:44:48About our future.
00:44:51Look, BJ.
00:44:54Everything is going to be okay.
00:44:56Do you believe that?
00:44:57It's just going to take a little time.
00:44:59That's all.
00:45:00Just a little time.
00:45:02I don't care if it takes forever.
00:45:03We belong together.
00:45:09Don't you see that?
00:45:10Oh, come on, BJ.
00:45:12Of course I see that.
00:45:14I understand that.
00:45:17But...
00:45:17Look.
00:45:19Look, are you hungry?
00:45:22No.
00:45:25Look, if you're worried about losing your job,
00:45:28you can come work with me.
00:45:30Come work with you doing what?
00:45:31Running the gas station.
00:45:34Gas station?
00:45:39Yeah, it's just a two-pumper.
00:45:41It's closed now, but, uh...
00:45:43I went free and clear.
00:45:45A gas station?
00:45:47Yeah.
00:45:48I suppose I have yours now, too.
00:45:50Look out, Dad.
00:45:51Now, wait a minute.
00:45:51Now, wait a minute.
00:45:52Now, wait a minute.
00:45:53What do you mean, it's half mine?
00:45:55Because.
00:45:56Through my father.
00:46:01The gas station.
00:46:03Well, Grandpa died, and Aunt Florence was already in a convent, so he left it to Mom.
00:46:11It must have been tough for her.
00:46:14I mean, it's hard enough for a man, but for a woman, you know.
00:46:18But I guess your mother was big.
00:46:23Strong for a woman.
00:46:24You don't even remember what she looked like, huh?
00:46:29Oh, yes, I remember.
00:46:32Um, it's just that people change.
00:46:37You know?
00:46:39This time and a half goes by.
00:46:41She remembered you.
00:46:44Talks about you all the time.
00:46:45She told you about me?
00:46:49A lot.
00:46:52She...
00:46:52She wasn't ashamed.
00:46:54Neither was I.
00:46:57You know, when something like that happens,
00:47:00it can be beautiful.
00:47:02That's what Mom said.
00:47:06I don't know what to say.
00:47:08She didn't blame you, or anything.
00:47:13It's the truth.
00:47:14I wouldn't lie about a thing like that.
00:47:19She was blonde, with light green eyes,
00:47:22five feet four, and weighed 109 pounds,
00:47:24if you'd care to know.
00:47:30Mm-hmm.
00:47:33I won't forget after this.
00:47:38Okay.
00:47:40Okay.
00:47:42Okay, let's, uh, let's get out of here.
00:47:45I'm going to introduce you to...
00:47:48some people that I can't possibly describe to you.
00:47:53Who's that?
00:47:54Your grandparents.
00:47:57Come on.
00:47:58What kind of a boy is it?
00:48:02Goes around 37 years, never married.
00:48:04Interior decorators, that's what kind.
00:48:07And hairdressers.
00:48:09I'll get it.
00:48:12Hello?
00:48:13It's Johnny.
00:48:15Johnny?
00:48:16I'm coming, dear.
00:48:18What's the matter, sweetheart?
00:48:22Oh.
00:48:23Well, wait a minute.
00:48:24He's got somebody he wants us to meet.
00:48:27What time is it?
00:48:28It's 11.15.
00:48:30Oh.
00:48:30Well, couldn't it wait, sweetheart?
00:48:32It's after 11.
00:48:35Uh-huh.
00:48:36No, no.
00:48:37Okay, if that's the way you feel about it,
00:48:38you come right over.
00:48:39We'll be here.
00:48:40So?
00:48:42So he's got somebody he wants us to meet,
00:48:44and it won't wait.
00:48:45I wonder who it could be.
00:48:48You don't suppose it's that topless dancer?
00:48:50Topless dancer?
00:48:54Yes, the one whose father's a judge over in Orange County.
00:48:58Daughter of a judge.
00:49:00That'd be too much to hope for.
00:49:02We'd better get dressed just in case.
00:49:20They're here.
00:49:23Oh.
00:49:24Is somebody with him?
00:49:26Yes.
00:49:27What does she look like?
00:49:28I think you'd better sit down, Ethel.
00:49:30Oh, she's nothing special.
00:49:31Ethel, sit down.
00:49:32She's ugly.
00:49:33Ethel.
00:49:34I'm going to look for myself.
00:49:37Ethel, I...
00:49:50Oh, my God.
00:50:03Look, um...
00:50:06It's not too late to back out.
00:50:08I don't want to back out.
00:50:09Do you?
00:50:10No.
00:50:12No, it's...
00:50:13It's got to be done.
00:50:17What are we going to do?
00:50:18I don't know.
00:50:19Well, we have to let him in and talk to them.
00:50:21Why?
00:50:23He's your son.
00:50:24He's your son, too.
00:50:25What are we going to say?
00:50:26Don't say anything.
00:50:28Just listen.
00:50:32What if I start to cry?
00:50:49You're really nervous, aren't you?
00:50:53No.
00:50:54No, it's, uh...
00:50:56This is the only way.
00:51:00We're going to have to get some more money.
00:51:03Money?
00:51:04Is that what this is about?
00:51:06Money?
00:51:06Is that why we're here?
00:51:07That's one of the reasons, yes.
00:51:08Besides, you're going to have to meet my parents sometime.
00:51:10I don't make enough money to support us on my income.
00:51:12Do you think it's because I want you to support me?
00:51:14No.
00:51:15I don't need you to support me.
00:51:16I supported myself long before I met you.
00:51:18I'm sure you have, BJ.
00:51:20Please.
00:51:21That's all you think about is money.
00:51:23I'm sorry.
00:51:23I'm not going in there.
00:51:24I'm not meeting anybody.
00:51:26BJ, we've come this far.
00:51:28I really don't care if I ever see you again.
00:51:32Bye.
00:51:32I don't care if I ever see you again.
00:51:37Wait.
00:51:41Don't go to sleep.
00:51:42I've got something I've got to tell you.
00:51:50Where did we go wrong?
00:51:54BJ.
00:51:55I said goodbye.
00:51:56Nice knowing you.
00:51:57BJ.
00:51:57I don't need you.
00:51:58I don't need your help.
00:51:58All right.
00:51:59I'm sorry I made it sound like that.
00:52:01It's just that everything happens so fast.
00:52:04It happened to me too, you know.
00:52:05It isn't every day you find out you have a grown son.
00:52:10A man.
00:52:12I'm not even sure I think of myself as a man.
00:52:16The whole thing has been such a shock to me.
00:52:19What about me?
00:52:20My whole life I've grown up being told my father was a war hero.
00:52:25Saved the world for me.
00:52:27Some war hero.
00:52:28Oh, that's not fair, BJ.
00:52:29You know, I told you they wouldn't accept me.
00:52:32Will you stop all this foolishness and just come back with me?
00:52:37I'm not going anywhere with you.
00:52:41What are you afraid of?
00:52:46BJ, I didn't know what my parents would say.
00:52:50Oh, right.
00:52:51Yeah.
00:52:51They might send you to bed without supper.
00:52:55You know, you're a coward.
00:52:56What did you say?
00:53:00I said you're a coward.
00:53:08Now, will you come back?
00:53:15Okay.
00:53:15I was trying to start something.
00:53:23Yeah, well, I think you were starting it in the wrong place.
00:53:27Your parents, that's for later.
00:53:29It's something else.
00:53:30Right now, it's between you and me.
00:53:33You're my father.
00:53:34I'm your son.
00:53:36That's the way it is.
00:53:37Now, if you don't like it like that, I can take off.
00:53:40I like it fine.
00:53:41Just fine.
00:53:42I like it fine.
00:53:42Just fine.
00:53:45I'm sorry I slept.
00:53:53It's okay.
00:53:56Can we talk, then?
00:54:11Hungry?
00:54:12You know, that's all you ever ask me?
00:54:15Am I hungry?
00:54:16Well, are you?
00:54:18Yeah.
00:54:18All right.
00:54:19I'll fix you some scrambled eggs.
00:54:21And then we will sit down and we'll have a nice, long talk.
00:54:24Okay?
00:54:26Okay.
00:54:26Okay.
00:54:26Okay.
00:54:26Okay.
00:54:26Okay.
00:54:26Okay.
00:54:26Okay.
00:54:26Okay.
00:54:27Okay.
00:54:27Okay.
00:54:27Okay.
00:54:28Okay.
00:54:29Okay.
00:54:29Okay.
00:54:30Okay.
00:54:31Okay.
00:54:31Okay.
00:54:32Okay.
00:54:33Okay.
00:54:33Okay.
00:54:34Okay.
00:54:35Okay.
00:54:35Okay.
00:54:36Okay.
00:54:37Okay.
00:54:38Okay.
00:54:39Okay.
00:54:40Okay.
00:54:41Okay.
00:54:41Hey, surprise.
00:54:42Surprise?
00:54:43It certainly is a surprise.
00:54:44What?
00:54:45Why?
00:54:46Why?
00:54:46Well, I tried to tell you earlier, but you were so involved with your scheduling that I
00:54:47decided to make a big surprise for you.
00:54:48Oh.
00:54:49Well, it's marvelous, Rhonda, but it's not my birthday.
00:54:50I know.
00:54:51It's mine.
00:54:52Well, isn't it neat to throw a birthday party for yourself and make it a big surprise for
00:54:53someone else?
00:54:54Yeah.
00:54:55Yes, it is.
00:54:56And I appreciate it.
00:54:57I'll be right back, sweetheart.
00:54:58I'll be right back, sweetheart.
00:54:59I'll just have to finish the conversation.
00:55:00Okay?
00:55:01PJ, I knew nothing about this.
00:55:02I knew we'd never be able to have that talk.
00:55:03We will have that talk.
00:55:04We will have that talk.
00:55:05If you're crying out loud, it's her birthday.
00:55:06PJ, it's her birthday.
00:55:07What do you want me to do?
00:55:08Ask all these people to leave this apartment right now?
00:55:09Huh?
00:55:10Because you know I can't do that.
00:55:11Now, will you be fair?
00:55:12PJ, we will talk tomorrow.
00:55:13I promise you that.
00:55:14But right now, I have to handle it.
00:55:15Come on.
00:55:16Come on.
00:55:17Come on.
00:55:18Come on.
00:55:19Come on.
00:55:20Come on.
00:55:21Come on.
00:55:22Come on.
00:55:23Come on.
00:55:24Come on.
00:55:25Come on.
00:55:26Come on.
00:55:27Come on.
00:55:28Come on.
00:55:29Come on.
00:55:30Come on.
00:55:31Come on.
00:55:32Come on.
00:55:33Come on.
00:55:34But right now, I have to handle it.
00:55:35Come on.
00:55:36Yeah.
00:55:37I will.
00:55:38I will.
00:55:39Tomorrow.
00:55:40I promise you, PJ.
00:55:52PJ.
00:55:53Bye.
00:55:54Wait a minute.
00:55:55What are you doing?
00:55:56Are you leaving?
00:55:57Yeah.
00:56:00Does Johnny know?
00:56:04What's he going to think?
00:56:07I don't think it matters to him.
00:56:11Because anything I can do.
00:56:13No.
00:56:14But thanks.
00:56:15You know what I mean?
00:56:17Bye.
00:56:19PJ.
00:56:20Goodbye.
00:56:21Be careful, will you?
00:56:26Please.
00:56:27Please.
00:56:28Yeah.
00:56:29You too.
00:56:30Okay.
00:56:43Johnny.
00:56:44Johnny.
00:56:45Johnny.
00:56:46Johnny.
00:56:47Wake up.
00:56:48Wake up.
00:56:49Who is it?
00:56:50Dee Dee.
00:56:51Dee Dee.
00:56:52Dee Dee.
00:56:53What are you doing here?
00:56:54Look, we'll talk about that later.
00:56:55It's BJ.
00:56:56He's gone.
00:56:57Mm-hmm.
00:56:58Gone.
00:56:59Gone?
00:57:00Where?
00:57:01Home.
00:57:02He just left.
00:57:03If you want to, you can catch him.
00:57:05Why?
00:57:06Why?
00:57:07Why would he go?
00:57:08Why not?
00:57:09Go on.
00:57:10Go on.
00:57:11Where?
00:57:12Home.
00:57:13He just left.
00:57:14If you want to, you can catch him.
00:57:17Why?
00:57:18Why would he go?
00:57:20Why not?
00:57:21Go on.
00:57:22Go on.
00:57:23Go on.
00:57:24Go on.
00:57:25Go on.
00:57:26Go on.
00:57:27Go on.
00:57:28Go on.
00:57:29Go on.
00:57:30Go on.
00:57:31Go on.
00:57:32Go on.
00:57:33Go on.
00:57:34Go on.
00:58:01Come on Dj.
00:58:01B.J., will you get in this car?
00:58:03B.J., you know, I really don't know what I was thinking about when I came here.
00:58:19B.J., I'm sorry.
00:58:21What are you sorry about?
00:58:23All right, then I'm not sorry.
00:58:25What do you want me to say?
00:58:27B.J., we can talk about this.
00:58:29No, you're wrong. We can't talk.
00:58:30Why not?
00:58:31Because we're different.
00:58:32What do you mean, different?
00:58:33How can we be different?
00:58:34You're my son.
00:58:35Now, when you come back to the apartment, we will sit down and we'll talk.
00:58:39Right.
00:58:40You'll ask me if I'm hungry.
00:58:42B.J., will you give me a chance?
00:58:45Now, where are you going?
00:58:47Don't worry.
00:58:48I'll be back to Barney again.
00:58:49I want to talk with you!
00:58:51I want you to talk to me!
00:59:00B.J.
00:59:01B.J.
00:59:02B.J.
00:59:03I want you to talk to me.
00:59:04I want you to talk to me.
00:59:05B.J.
00:59:06B.J.
00:59:07B.J.
00:59:08B.J.
00:59:09B.J.
00:59:10File this.
00:59:18Why are you staring at me like that?
00:59:20I'm not staring at you.
00:59:24Then why are you looking at me that way?
00:59:28I'm not looking at you in any way.
00:59:32It's just that you've been acting very...
00:59:36Oh, I don't know.
00:59:38Oh, now, come on, Edie.
00:59:41Put it in words. Be specific.
00:59:46Well, you should be the happiest guy in the world right now.
00:59:49You've gotten what you've wanted. He's gone.
00:59:52You're free of him forever.
00:59:56That's an important word to you, isn't it, Johnny?
00:59:59Forever.
01:00:01But you don't like that word. Do you know why?
01:00:04No, why?
01:00:06Because forever means a commitment.
01:00:09Everything's fine for you as long as it's not forever.
01:00:12Where you live, what you do, who you see.
01:00:15But let me tell you something.
01:00:17Life isn't forever.
01:00:19And as soon as you realize that, you'll start living it.
01:00:21Why don't we talk about this later?
01:00:34And why don't we have dinner together tonight?
01:00:36Not tonight.
01:00:37Tomorrow night?
01:00:38No, I'm not going to be here tomorrow.
01:00:40I've explained as much as I could to your father, but...
01:00:45Johnny, this is my last day.
01:00:47You're kidding.
01:00:49No.
01:00:56Well, I think you're making a terrible mistake.
01:00:59I know you do, Johnny.
01:01:00We could have an early dinner tonight.
01:01:05And then we could take an early movie.
01:01:07No, no, no.
01:01:12Okay.
01:01:15If that's the way you want it.
01:01:21Oh, would you call Rhonda Lewis for me, please?
01:01:23I think she works at, uh, KDF TV.
01:01:28Please.
01:01:32Come on, Eddie.
01:01:33We work to 5.30 here.
01:01:47Tell you what.
01:01:50After we finish here, why don't we go to The Apple?
01:01:52We were there last night.
01:01:55Well, all right.
01:01:56Then we'll, uh, go to the cellar.
01:01:58The night before.
01:02:00Hey.
01:02:03Is it my fault there's only two discotheques in town?
01:02:06No.
01:02:07But maybe it's your fault they're not fun anymore.
01:02:10What's that supposed to mean?
01:02:11You're different.
01:02:13Like bringing me here.
01:02:14What for?
01:02:18I happen to like the food here.
01:02:20Yeah.
01:02:21And why haven't you brought me here six months ago?
01:02:22Hmm?
01:02:24Hoping your folks might show up, Johnny?
01:02:26Rub it in a little bit.
01:02:27Hey, folks.
01:02:28Look who I brought to the country club.
01:02:29Take that and lump it.
01:02:31Oh.
01:02:32You really are being silly.
01:02:34No, I'm not.
01:02:35I like you.
01:02:40I really do.
01:02:42And I've always known where I stood with you, and I didn't mind.
01:02:46But it's over, isn't it?
01:02:50You're bored.
01:02:51I know it's not me.
01:02:52It's everybody like me.
01:02:53You've just had it.
01:02:55Rhonda.
01:03:00Don't, Johnny.
01:03:02You never lied to me before, so don't start now.
01:03:05You know something?
01:03:07You're growing up, Johnny boy.
01:03:10And you need your son.
01:03:14How did you know about my son?
01:03:16He told me.
01:03:17Well...
01:03:18Don't blame him.
01:03:19He was just so proud.
01:03:20Well, let's get out of here.
01:03:21No.
01:03:22Just me, Johnny.
01:03:24Hey, I don't belong here.
01:03:25But you know something?
01:03:26I'm lucky, because I know it.
01:03:27I just hope you find out where you belong before it's too late, huh?
01:03:29Bye, Johnny.
01:03:30Bye, Johnny.
01:03:31Bye.
01:03:32Bye.
01:03:33Bye.
01:03:34Bye.
01:03:35Bye.
01:03:36Bye.
01:03:37Bye.
01:03:38Bye.
01:03:39Bye.
01:04:00Bye.
01:04:28Edie?
01:04:30Evie, I wanna talk with you.
01:04:36Evie.
01:04:38I wanna talk with you.
01:04:42Evie...
01:04:48Johnny, what are you doing here?
01:04:50Well, I've been just about another place else.
01:04:53I can believe that.
01:04:54Hey, can I come in?
01:04:55No.
01:04:58Oh, sorry.
01:04:59Well, please, Edie, I want to, uh...
01:05:03I want to talk with him.
01:05:05There's nothing to talk about.
01:05:07Oh, don't give me any of that.
01:05:11Please, don't give me any of that.
01:05:19I, uh...
01:05:21Well, you see, there's nobody else.
01:05:25Sorry, Johnny.
01:05:27Edie?
01:05:28Edie?
01:05:34Edie, I'm all alone.
01:05:38You know how I hate to be alone.
01:05:44You'd be with anybody rather than be alone, right?
01:05:47No, I didn't say that. I didn't mean that.
01:05:52I didn't.
01:05:53I didn't mean that.
01:05:55All right, I won't touch you, okay?
01:05:59It's just that I want to be with somebody...
01:06:03...til I get everything...
01:06:05...straightened out.
01:06:06It has nothing to do with me.
01:06:12Well, don't you have any feelings for me?
01:06:18What difference does it make?
01:06:20Johnny, please, please, please, go away.
01:06:28Need some help, Edie?
01:06:36No, no, I'll be there in a... in a second.
01:06:50Oh.
01:06:54Oh, so that's it.
01:06:59You have a new boyfriend?
01:07:02No, Johnny.
01:07:05A new man-friend.
01:07:20Good.
01:07:21I'll be there in a second.
01:07:23I'll be there.
01:07:25I'll be there in a second.
01:07:27Shut up.
01:07:29I'll be there.
01:07:31I'll be there, too.
01:07:33I'm not sure.
01:07:35I'll be there, too.
01:07:37You must be there.
01:07:39I'll be there, too.
01:07:41But...
01:07:42Well, what's this all about?
01:07:46Johnny, the Mount won't come to Mohammed,
01:07:48and Mohammed comes to the Mount, right?
01:07:50When is it now?
01:07:52Darling, we're your parents.
01:07:54You can talk to us.
01:07:56Tell us what's wrong.
01:08:00What makes you think something's wrong?
01:08:02Well, ask anybody.
01:08:04Johnny, maybe it's my fault.
01:08:06I never took you to enough balls.
01:08:08I should have taken you to the fights,
01:08:10but I just never had enough time.
01:08:12What?
01:08:13And when you were 15,
01:08:14I wanted to buy you a motorcycle,
01:08:15but your mother...
01:08:16He would have killed himself.
01:08:18But all that's water under the bridge.
01:08:20Thank God we've got money.
01:08:22I'll take you to the best psychiatrist we can find.
01:08:24I think he's someplace in New York.
01:08:26Switzerland.
01:08:27There's nothing wrong.
01:08:29Well, then tell us what is the matter with you.
01:08:31You have a job, you have a car,
01:08:33you have parents,
01:08:35you have parents,
01:08:37you love you,
01:08:38you have everything a boy could want.
01:08:40Mother...
01:08:43I'm not a boy.
01:08:46I'm a man.
01:08:49Oh, Johnny, darling, will you...
01:08:51I'm not a boy!
01:08:54So please don't think of me as a boy.
01:08:58Because I'm a man.
01:09:02I'm a man.
01:09:03I'm a man.
01:09:04I'm a man.
01:09:05I am a man.
01:09:06I am not a boy.
01:09:12I don't want the job.
01:09:15And I don't want the car.
01:09:17And I don't want the parents to love me.
01:09:20Like a little boy.
01:09:30I am a man!
01:09:42I am a man!
01:09:47I am a man!
01:09:50I am a man!
01:09:56I am a man!
01:10:20I am a man!
01:10:22I am a man!
01:10:24I am a man!
01:10:26I am a man!
01:10:28I am a man!
01:10:30I am a man!
01:10:32I am a man!
01:10:34I am a man!
01:10:36I am a man!
01:10:38I am a man!
01:10:40I am a man!
01:10:42I am a man!
01:10:44I am a man!
01:10:46I am a man!
01:11:48What are you doing here?
01:12:09What are you doing here?
01:12:11I belong here.
01:12:12I've been, uh, from one end of this state to the other looking for you.
01:12:21Why?
01:12:27Unless, uh, I was looking for somebody to talk to.
01:12:33Do you know what I mean?
01:12:38Hmm?
01:12:49Hungry?
01:12:50Come on.
01:13:02Come on.
01:13:02Come on.
01:13:04Come on.
01:13:06Come on.
01:13:14Come on.
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