Stuck While Skiing

Beasley Digital

The show talks about a woman who had to call 911 after she was stuck in her recliner, which leads to Chuck and a listener bonding over similar experiences of being stuck on a ski hill.

Transcript

00:00Cops have a pretty bad job aside from actual emergencies they got a deal with a whole bunch

00:10of crazy calls to write enter the fine folks in blue in Chattanooga Tennessee they were called to

00:17the home of a larger lady who got stuck in her recliner does that call I guess we gonna do here

00:28what happened is the button fell off her powered recliner oh and it left her stuck in fully reclined

00:36now that's it all the blood slowly fully dripping to my brain

00:39someone please the pain is quite intense my breasts are smothering me

00:46fully I had to bat him off I had to bat him off the side of the chair

00:51oh god luckily got my chin through my cleavage made an air pocket

00:58just a small and I don't know how much time I have

01:03I'm using the straw from the sleepy I had

01:07made a homemade snorkel

01:11kind of just popping up out of my fat

01:14oh you guys that's so sad yeah that's so sad if you have to call the cops because you're stuck in

01:21your own recliner I'll be honest I've been almost stuck in a recliner

01:24I think everyone has can get stuck in a recliner you can manage to get out yeah true

01:30do they make recliners for bigger people yeah they're designed they're they're special

01:37recliners are they just called American recliners now yeah pretty much the Hercules series but it'll

01:44lift you right up and out of there I don't mind that you can get camouflaged recliners well sure you

01:49can't just in case yeah you don't want anyone to see I just wanted it to blend in I do a lot of

01:55forest forest sitting when I'm hunting I like to be comfortable drag this drag this son of a

02:03bitch all the way out there to the forest it's tied to my waist drag it out there obviously I'm not

02:09climbing a tree so I'm not you're not getting me up there what I'm running into a lot what I'm

02:14hunting is the deer hear me breathe the deer's hearing me breathe yeah so I've been sitting

02:20to alleviate some of that so I can be sneaky turns out I just hunt for my back porch

02:30wrestled a boar the other day and by wrestle a boar I mean I ate

02:36two acts of ribs yeah that's right that's what I call it

02:41rib night a chance Bob's with us on the line hey Bob good morning hey Bob good morning how we doing

02:48doing okay thanks uh what's your comment well that recliner thing must have been embarrassing for her

02:55but mine is better I went to a ski resort I was 420 pounds at the time okay I'm on the I'm on the

03:02jay hook it's pulling me up the mountain it hooks onto the back of my pants and I fall down oh no

03:06oh no man it drives me up the mountain like a dead deer I'm yelling for help they're looking at me

03:13nobody comes over to help me well when this thing gets to the top of the mountain it goes up and

03:18around and comes back around it couldn't it couldn't lift me off the ground so it started screaming

03:24oh no smoke starts pouring out of it and only because of the danger of it burning out they come

03:37running and have to cut the jay hook off my pants so I got a big hole in the back you almost broke a

03:42whole ski lift Bob I almost shut that place down Bob so Bob like what so Bob for sure doesn't know

03:51but uh because we've only been on for like a year in Boston but this exact thing happened to me

03:58yeah on a ski hill when I was a child I got stuck I was waiting for that hook to go by

04:06it clipped on my jacket and pulled and it pulled me up the hill and much like you so I was a kid at

04:15the time like I was a fat kid it was it was ready to pull me into the whole mechanism oh my god just

04:22so I was just like jesus

04:24I was trying to rip my jacket no one cared no one cared all the skiers just looking at me just dragging

04:35up the ski lift it pulled every muscle on one side of my body oh my god and I managed to tear

04:43myself loose so to hear someone else that was dragged up a ski hill it really it just makes

04:51me feel a lot better about myself there you go man you got something coming upside down like they

04:55were trying to dress a moose I had both of my skis still attached to me just dragging behind me

05:04pulling pulling me apart so bobby you have lost a bunch of weight since then

05:09oh he's gone now that's I guess he was 420 but he's yeah yeah I wonder if that was his moment

05:14yeah that could have been his moment like if that was his like oh my god I almost broke a whole ski lift

05:18I better lose some weight yeah those two stories chuck and bob's stories are the reason I've never

05:24went skiing no you'll never go skiing no that's when I decided the very first time I would never ski

05:29again and then I then you attempted it then I was like an idiot and and you know let that yeah go

05:35and then broke my finger every time I thought about skiing I broke it down too I was like well let's see

05:40here it's just uh something lifts up way up high in the sky that's a bad start that's a bad start

05:46then you're at the top of a mountain and you just your weight just pulls you down

05:51full force I'm not a scientist but seems like I got a lot of gravity just uh

05:56tugging away at this chubby chassis of mine so maybe I shouldn't

06:00probably a good call in

06:03velocity velocity mass time

06:07all my physics training has taught me that I probably shouldn't do this

06:10yeah you know your own strengths yeah right good thing to keep that in mind

06:14hmm

06:15hmm

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