00:00There, I should probably not do this today, but there's a list of the 10 things you should
00:17do on the first 10 minutes of your day to make that day better.
00:20Oh, Jesus.
00:22So I figured, I wonder how many I've done.
00:25Why not on a Tuesday?
00:26Yeah.
00:27I wonder how many I've done.
00:30See if you, um, there's some changes you guys can make and make your day better.
00:34Yeah, exactly.
00:35I've been making a lot of changes.
00:37You know me, Lace, I'm always trying to change everything for the better.
00:42Yeah.
00:43I try to, I try to optimize myself.
00:46I'm always just trying to be a better Andy.
00:51Well, how can you be a better Andy or Chuck or James or Lisa or Dave?
00:56Here's what we can do.
00:57Let's find out.
00:57Or Jason the Jew.
00:58We're up one ounce, not on that list.
01:00Oh, I doubt it.
01:01Oh, shenanigans on your list, Dave.
01:02Yeah.
01:03No.
01:04Uh, don't hit snooze.
01:05Oh, wow.
01:06I already screwed that up.
01:07Yeah, me too.
01:08So you always, you guys always press snooze?
01:11Once at least.
01:12A snooze is such an ingrained part of my morning.
01:14It starts, my snooze starts at 4.15, which is the time I intend to hit the floor.
01:18Yeah, my snooze is intentional.
01:21Like, it is.
01:23I snooze for an hour.
01:24Do you really?
01:26Do you really?
01:26I hit it like 10 times.
01:27Wow.
01:28See, I don't because it just breaks up my sleep.
01:31Oh, I'd rather just sleep right through and then wake up when I'm supposed to wake up.
01:36Oh, man, I've slept in for an hour.
01:38Now I can go get up and go to work.
01:38Oh, you feel like you can trick yourself?
01:40Yeah.
01:40I know.
01:41I realized I used to snooze a lot, hit the snooze, but it just, I'd wake up and be like,
01:45oh, 10 more minutes.
01:46Yeah.
01:46Instead of, and then I thought, I can just sleep right through until the exact time I need
01:50to wake up and then I'll wake up like, oh.
01:52I leave myself time for one snooze if I need it.
01:54One snooze.
01:55One snooze.
01:55I got one snooze.
01:56Maybe on a day I might need it, but I rarely use it.
01:59Some guy says, number one, masturbate every morning.
02:03Yeah, I couldn't do that.
02:04Yeah, that would work opposite for me.
02:06That would go right back to sleep.
02:08Yeah.
02:09You guys would be calling and calling.
02:15Chuck?
02:18Patty, could you wake Chuck up, please?
02:20Yeah, Patty, could you wake him up?
02:21Yeah.
02:21Oh, yeah, that's true.
02:23Get up, you son of a bitch!
02:27Dave's calling again!
02:30That is honestly our biggest fear.
02:32It is crazy you've had to call the house before.
02:34Oh, yeah.
02:35I've had to call his dad.
02:36Many times.
02:37I go way back to when he lived with his parents.
02:39Yeah.
02:39I had to call his dad.
02:40The bride should be, Charlie!
02:42Yep.
02:42Charlie, get up!
02:43Hold on, Dave.
02:44And the thing is, my dad wouldn't say like, okay, Dave, I'll go get him up.
02:49He'd take Dave with him.
02:50Yeah.
02:52I'd hear him.
02:53Oh, come on.
02:53Let's go.
02:54Down the hall.
02:54Let's go get him, Dave.
02:55Open the bed.
02:55Charlie!
02:56Dave would ride along with you.
02:58Dave would hear the whole process.
02:59Like, if I, when I'm finally, you know, the dad who's getting the phone call the way growing
03:05up, I'll be like, yeah, I'll get him up.
03:07See you later.
03:07Bye-bye.
03:08Bye.
03:08You know?
03:09Like, I'll have the decency to hang the phone up and not, Charlie!
03:16You damn idiot!
03:19It was all very awkward.
03:20And then he'd put Chuck on the phone.
03:21He'd make Chuck talk.
03:22Talk to Dave!
03:24Talk to him!
03:24Dave, I'm up, obviously.
03:27You heard that whole thing.
03:28Yeah, I know you're up now.
03:29I heard that your dad get up and walk down the hall.
03:32Uh-huh.
03:32You gotta physically touch me.
03:35I mean, your voice isn't gonna do it.
03:39This guy said, just got a morning Hummer.
03:42Great way to start the day.
03:43Wow.
03:44Is there a better way to start the day than that?
03:47Probably not.
03:47The only thing better would be two morning Hummers.
03:52Jesus.
03:53Oh, you're right, a double Hummer?
03:54I could die from that.
03:55Robin used to wake me up with the beginning of the, I think it's, whatever that Prince
03:59song is where he's like, ladies and gentlemen.
04:01Oh!
04:02It sounds like a spaceship's landing.
04:04Delivered.
04:05We're gathered here today.
04:07I hate that song now.
04:10But it used to scare the crap out of me because it sounds like an alien has come into the bedroom
04:15and is about to approach you and take you somewhere.
04:19I wake up and it's like, meee.
04:21Like somebody on the organ.
04:22And it only plays that little bit of the song, usually.
04:27Yeah.
04:27It'll start and then it stops.
04:29But then it'll go back to ladies and gentlemen again.
04:32Oh, Jesus.
04:33It was crazy.
04:34When is this?
04:35Yeah, that's it.
04:35Yeah, yeah, that's it.
04:36Yeah, I hate it.
04:37Gave me a bad feeling.
04:38It was like three months where I woke up to this.
04:41Electric word, life, it means forever.
04:44And that's a mighty life.
04:45It was so loud you wouldn't even imagine.
04:50It sounded like Prince was in my bedroom.
04:53Well, I've never been here.
04:56You can always see this.
04:57It's so weird to wake up to.
04:59So it wouldn't get into the fun stuff.
05:02No, just this part.
05:03This part.
05:04Here we go.
05:04So it stops.
05:05Wow, it sounds like the ghost of Prince is haunting me.
05:09See, because this could get Lisa.
05:11Lisa's like, oh, this is good.
05:13Yeah.
05:13Yeah.
05:13Yeah, we'll never make it to that.
05:16See, it never got to this part.
05:17Because I thought something horrifying was happening that was outside of the realm of
05:25science.
05:26I was like, somebody's in the room, the voice.
05:30Something's happening.
05:32God himself is sucking.
05:35Ladies and gentlemen.
05:38Oh, wow.
05:39Great.
05:40Andy, wake up.
05:42Andy's terrified.
05:45When we come back here.
05:47No.
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