Chuck's Spinal Tap

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak asked guys to share stories of times they have passed as grown men. One call reminds Chuck of a childhood spinal tap experience and one text is about a gay pride parade.

Transcript

00:00we're talking about um guys what made you pass out as a grown man uh this one came in through

00:14text my ex-husband passed out while watching me have a spinal tap in the er oh i had a spinal

00:20tap or epidural or whatever it was and when you were having a baby or when did they do that when

00:27uh they yeah i got this weird thing with my ankle and they thought i was just making it up this quack

00:32doctor i went to was like i could i couldn't i uh got hit in football and i couldn't move all i could

00:38do with my ankle is move it up and down and this quack 80 year old doctor was like i think he's

00:42making it up and so they wanted to numb the bottom half of my body and then he wanted to try and

00:50manipulate it so he gave me an epidural he gave me an epidural so i'm in the fetal position and

00:56i'm telling you it feels like a screwdriver is going in your spine right that's how it feels

01:00i mean it is the same thing when she got absolutely atrocious and uh no and of course he's like nope

01:07uh nope something really going on there i was like okay well i'll never see this maybe an x-ray next

01:11time yeah no exactly let me put down let me shove you full of stuff and shove a screwdriver in your

01:19spine half of medicine when he started in 1941 he was just you're lying aren't you

01:25oh we'll get the truth out of it i've never had a doctor say that to me i thought i was lying

01:30your ankle hurts does it well how do you deal with this poisonous gas yeah exactly

01:38he hammers it but i was voicing my displeasure with everything at every turn but the price is like

01:45you're gonna suck it up boy and you're gonna get fixed if it's all in your brain if you're just a

01:50moron and you're making it up so you're not you're not sided with the doctor yeah of course the price

01:55he said the price would go with any authority yes a guy who played for boston college stepped on my

02:05foot and knocked me over tore everything in my foot i don't believe it

02:09was this a doctor that you had been going to or their family it was like a family no i had my

02:16family doctor and then they sent you know that you they referred you to someone they referred me

02:22to a guy he was like hey came out like a walker he didn't have a walker but he was old he was so old

02:28and i don't think he read a medical textbook in probably 40 years yeah you know it's funny when

02:35you're a parent though like you just because it's up to you i guess yeah you know it wasn't up to me

02:41because i was like this is like a pretty stupid idea i'm not sure exactly what my spinal cord has to do

02:49i've really twisted my ankle back but now you're gonna stick a screwdriver

02:59it's right because you're a liar you're a dirty little liar it's been years

03:07it's a really long lie four years of a lie super long time nerdy little chubby chub the freak had

03:15to get the spinal tap shortly afterwards my dad like came and was well i heard he was a quack

03:21and it turns out he was thanks a lot dad after the spinal tap yeah

03:30i heard a couple rumors he was

03:32right out of his goddamn mind i didn't realize till you were nude on that table

03:38just how out of his goddamn mind he was turns out he was right out of his goddamn mind i hope you're

03:44okay boy you're okay how'd that feel hurt like hell huh i'll tell you i couldn't look because

03:52your chubby ass was in the fetal position

03:56and uh he was jamming you good he couldn't find it he said he couldn't find what he was trying to get

04:03oh poor little chuck

04:05oh that's fine this guy texted us and he said that he passed out at gay pride fest oh jesus christ

04:15from heat stroke but the worst part is what he fell face first into the naked hairy ass of the guy in

04:22front of him don't just leave him

04:28he's safe where he is

04:31oh i think i'm coming too

04:35are you okay back there where am i oh little soldier let me tell you

04:40is this the grass this isn't grass at all sure isn't

04:44is he an ass am i in an ass right now you are actually in my ass right now

04:48just get me out of here no you're stuck that's the crazy thing

04:53when you passed out your hands became interlocked in my ass hair

04:58i see this yeah i can't move no you're stuck but don't worry because the parade's only another four

05:04hours yeah just enjoy yourself yeah don't shoot me don't shoot me so much

05:11sorry i can't help it i love this song i'm shaking too much back here

05:17just enjoy it while you're back there if there's anything else you're just wondering about

05:24go for it all right

05:29the dude was straight he was there with his girlfriend and he exact passed out

05:35it's okay your boyfriend passed out he's right in his ass

05:42seriously if you touch him if you wake him up it's bad for him you just gotta let nature take his

05:47course yeah look at his tongues out enjoy these sweet beats he's in a safe place

05:53oh wow marcus don't move your ass hold him marcus don't move he's in a precarious position

06:05inside that little loincloth of yours he did he fell right into it someone said what came first the

06:11faint to the taint yeah yeah i'm pretty sure the faint and then it was like all right

06:19well yeah it's a risky take as a straight man at a gay pride fest i guess sure is you could pass out

06:22it everybody knows everyone knows any many moments

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