- 36 minutes ago
Coca-Cola Zero Sugar and ESSENCE brought the season 5 cast of If Not For My Girls to the Girls United Summit in Atlanta.
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00:00If Not For My Girls!
00:06What they do ATL?
00:08Welcome you guys to the live taping of season 5, If Not For My Girls!
00:13Presented by Coke Zero Sugar.
00:15What they do y'all?
00:18Good afternoon.
00:19Good afternoon ladies.
00:20How we feel?
00:21Blessed, black and hot.
00:22You ready to disrupt?
00:23Period.
00:25What's tea everybody?
00:26It's your girl Bia Bia.
00:28Let's have some fun.
00:30What's up y'all?
00:31It's your girl Pritt TV.
00:33Money Long here.
00:36What's up y'all?
00:37Okay.
00:39So look, I don't know about y'all but since the last time I saw y'all, I've been super busy.
00:44How about you?
00:45Girl, first of all, busy.
00:48Blessed, black.
00:50I've been real busy too y'all.
00:52Since the last time I seen y'all, I know we all been busy.
00:54I follow you guys, I know what you guys, a little bit of what y'all been up to.
00:57But I just got off on tour.
00:59I just got off on my first headline tour, you guys.
01:02And it was so beautiful.
01:03It was such a beautiful experience because I've never headlined a tour before.
01:07And I got to really connect with the people in a way I've never got to connect with them.
01:12And you know, kicking off a little makeup line or whatever.
01:15I've been in the stores and I'm diving into the business.
01:19And this is a side of my, I feel like, career that I've never got to be so hands on with everything.
01:26Like I feel like I'm the boss of everything.
01:28I love that.
01:29And I've also never seen a female rapper have their own makeup line so that's super disruptive.
01:34Yes.
01:36Yes.
01:37I love glam.
01:38All for the girls.
01:39I love glam so, so much.
01:40What's the name of your makeup?
01:41Beauty for certain.
01:42Beauty for certain.
01:43Love that.
01:44It's in urban outfitters right now.
01:46And I just love disrupting things y'all.
01:49Like I love just putting my stamp on whatever I love and I'm passionate about.
01:53So if that's glam, beauty, music, that's what I've been doing lately.
01:57But I don't think, I don't think the people in here made a little bit more noise in there.
02:01Y'all gotta give it up for Bia y'all.
02:02She got a makeup line.
02:06A makeup line and urban outfitters child.
02:07Yeah.
02:08No, that's dope.
02:09Super.
02:10Jesus.
02:11I just been, I just been working.
02:12You know, I think this season has been a shift for a lot of people, you know, even for
02:16myself.
02:17Y'all know me being a comedian and an actress and a philanthropist and just, you know, having
02:22my businesses as well, but I also feel like there's a shift.
02:25And I just think people just been shifting in this season from me and just me kind of
02:30changing up what I want to do.
02:32And I think that's what I've been diving in lately.
02:34I've been working, but I've also been like, what else do you have for me, God?
02:38And I know it can't be just this, you know, I just, I want more.
02:41And just trying to have that team who believes in you.
02:44Cause sometimes when you in this industry, you just want believers around you.
02:47I just don't want me to just be an artist to cut a check for you.
02:50Like you have to really love what I do.
02:52You have to study.
02:53Like I studied Jim Carrey.
02:54I want y'all to study Pretty V to really know like what's next.
02:57Like what do you see like for me and how can you contribute to my brand?
03:01So I've been in that space heavy lately.
03:03I love that.
03:04Yeah.
03:05And I do just to add to what you said.
03:06I feel like you have to surround yourself with people who care about you, your wellbeing,
03:13who want to support you and uplift you and all your ideas, your vision, not just around
03:20for the check.
03:21You know what I'm saying?
03:22And I feel like too, like, you know, creativity thrives where there's love, where there's,
03:29where you feel safe.
03:32It's almost like, you know, a little child when they come into a room and they don't
03:37know nobody, they're very like reserved.
03:39And when you're surrounded with love and people make you feel comfortable and safe, you feel
03:45more freedom to express.
03:47And I think maybe that's where in this social media age where everybody's watching you with
03:52a microscope, it's hard to just take that first step.
03:57Cause you're afraid like, Oh God, what if they think I'm stupid?
04:00What if they don't like it?
04:01What if I get canceled?
04:02I can't express my opinion without somebody being upset.
04:06And so just surrounding yourself with people who love and care about you is very, very important.
04:13Very important.
04:14That's crazy.
04:15Cause people always ask like when you're picking a manager or when you like cultivating your
04:19team with music or entertainment in any way, they always ask like, how do you go about
04:23finding the right team or how do you go about finding a team?
04:26And I always say like, for me, like the, nobody is going to work harder for you than the people
04:30that genuinely care about you or care about your wellbeing or your family.
04:34You know, like, so me and my team, we know each other's whole family.
04:38We know each other's moms, our brothers and sisters.
04:41So it's a, there's a personal, there's like something personal there that we want to see
04:45each other win.
04:46So we go a little bit harder to make sure that we each going as hard as we need to go to get
04:50where we need to be.
04:51Yeah.
04:52And in order to disrupt, you gotta have a team of people who will back you up.
04:56Even if you look crazy, right?
04:59You need to have a team of people that's going to be like, no, that's intentional.
05:03That's exactly what it's supposed to be doing.
05:05You know what I'm saying?
05:06Because a lot of times as a disruptor, that just means doing things that people don't
05:11expect you to do and being a trailblazer.
05:14So that means going in a direction that maybe no one's gone before or nobody that looks like
05:21you has gone before.
05:22And you gotta have people around you who are going to defend that for you.
05:25What do you feel like, what do you feel like you had to, like that you had to do first?
05:32That people were like, oh, that's crazy.
05:34You shouldn't do that.
05:35Like, oh, that's not going to work.
05:36And then you did it and it worked.
05:37And then you see so many, maybe so many other people follow suit and say like, oh, I can
05:41do this too because of you.
05:43Like my whole last year, you know, just like all the things that I was able to do as an
05:47independent artist.
05:49First of all, I started out as an artist.
05:52I got discovered on YouTube years ago.
05:55Say, me too.
05:56Yeah.
05:57Like, I uploaded my first video in like 2004.
05:59So shout out to YouTube.
06:02Reminds Instagram.
06:04And people, people thought I was nuts for talking to my camera.
06:08You know, they're like, why you be doing that?
06:10Why you sit there all day and just sing in front of your camera?
06:14Like, I don't know.
06:15It's fun.
06:16You know, I like it.
06:17And I think I'm always doing things that, well, maybe it's the Virgo in me.
06:25I don't know, but I don't like nothing that everybody else is doing.
06:29I want to do, like, if it's a rack that's, you know, empty, I will not buy that shirt
06:36because it just means there's too many people got it.
06:39I like going into the unknown.
06:41I like discovering new things.
06:43And a lot of times that's scary for people.
06:46And so when I started out as an artist on YouTube, it wasn't a thing to go viral.
06:53And then fast forward 10 years, I'm writing songs for other people so that I can, like, eat.
06:59And I'm like, you know, I feel like I've reached a ceiling with this.
07:03I want to be an artist again.
07:05And when I started that journey, everybody's like, why you doing that?
07:08You know, songwriting is where it's at.
07:10You know, this is what you need.
07:11You good at it.
07:12But just because you're good at something doesn't mean that it's fulfilling to you.
07:15And so when I shifted, you know, that's the word of the day, shift.
07:21When I shifted back into artistry, I had to do it in silence.
07:27I had to unplug from the industry because I knew so many people.
07:31It's almost like, you know, when you're a baby and they call you little doo-doo,
07:34little poo-poo, little ray-ray, you know.
07:37And you grow up and you want to grow into, like, you know, take me serious.
07:42They were like, oh, please, you know, that's a little boo-boo, you know.
07:46So I didn't want to experience, like, a suffocation or, you know, I didn't want to be pigeonholed
07:56into what other people thought I should be doing.
07:59So I did it in silence.
08:01And I changed the name and everything from Priscilla Renee to Money Long.
08:06And nobody knew.
08:08And it wasn't until my song, Hours and Hours, blew up that everybody started hitting me.
08:19Like, yo, is this you?
08:20Like, oh my God, this song is a smash.
08:23And I remember, like, the first three months from, like, December, January, February,
08:29as the song was blowing up, people were just like, oh my God, like, you actually did it.
08:34You did it.
08:35And so it's always going to be like that.
08:37They're not going to believe you until they see you do it.
08:40And then everybody's going to say, I knew you when, you know.
08:44I mean, I'm embarrassing.
08:49But yeah, I would say, like, just this whole last year of just...
08:53Forging my new path.
08:54And now I'm in a reset, in a shift.
08:56Yes.
08:57Just like you, where it's like, okay, we won the awards.
09:01We got the hit song.
09:02We got the Grammy.
09:04Let's not get complacent.
09:06Let's not rest on those laurels.
09:08Reset.
09:09What do I want to be in this season?
09:11Where do I want to go in this season?
09:13And that is very disruptive because a lot of people feel like, you know, I should just
09:17sit here for a second and, you know, show off my trophy.
09:20But I'm trying to win.
09:21I'm trying to grow.
09:22I'm trying to have progress.
09:23Because that's where I'm the most happy when I'm moving forward.
09:28Yeah.
09:29Yeah.
09:30So what advice would you give someone looking to, you know, show their talents or businesses
09:33on social media?
09:35I could start with me.
09:36Yeah.
09:37You start with me.
09:38I could start.
09:39I could start with me.
09:40Because I, you know, I started off being a social media influencer, you know, and now
09:44I don't like to go into it as like, I'm an influencer.
09:47I want to, you know, go by my title, a comedian, an actress, an all purpose entertainer, a philanthropist,
09:52a soon to be an author.
09:53Like I want to walk into that.
09:55Right?
09:56So thank y'all.
09:58But I also feel like it's hard work to get here.
10:01You know, you have to be very prayerful.
10:04Some things you gonna have to fail at, you know, and when you fail, please pick it up
10:08and, you know, watch where you fail at.
10:10Because the thing about it is with my mind, I'm such a creative and I want to keep going.
10:14Like, I want to like, if I do this skit, if I do this business, if I do this, I want
10:17to like, what's next?
10:18And I was talking to Bia backstage and I was like, for my birthday this year, I just wanted
10:21to be present in my blessing.
10:23I didn't want to just like, alright, I did DR, like we back to work.
10:26No.
10:27When I got back home, I looked at my house, I said, Jesus, I need you to clean this home
10:31so I could figure out what's the next step.
10:33Because it's October.
10:34Then it's gonna be November and December and I gotta figure this next step out for me.
10:38Because people, y'all see me on social media and go viral with Desi and be Simone and
10:41the Jesses and be on Wildin' Out.
10:43That's cool.
10:44But what is the end goal, right?
10:47How is Pretty V gonna show up for herself in this season?
10:50How is she gonna be just one person here by herself to grasp this audience alone?
10:57But how do you get there?
10:58Because I've done it with people or I've done it by myself but you guys haven't came
11:01out to a stand-up show.
11:03You guys haven't came out to a show to see me and see my characters.
11:06You guys just seen on social media.
11:08So in this season, I'm just like, it's a shift for me and now I have to make Pretty V out
11:14there alone by herself to get this audience to come to my show.
11:17And how you get there is by being still when God speaks to you.
11:22Being prayerful but also making sure your mind is so positive to receive it.
11:28I spoke to my team this morning and I said, Bebe, there is a shift happening and I know
11:32it's for my good but I gotta walk into it.
11:35And you guys know me as doing the Ghetto Girl skits and being Bobo and just add it.
11:40Yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:41But then sometimes I'd be like, I get that but did Kenya Barris look over me because I've
11:48been in that character for too long?
11:50Or did Tyler Perry just went down on my page and said, I see her but what else?
11:56And that's why I change up my characters to Sharon, to Lil Red, to the color pink lady
12:03that was in the bushes so you could see the diversity.
12:06Color pink now.
12:08So you could see the diversity of me because I'm just not that loud girl like, yeah, we
12:13gonna be there.
12:15Like I get that.
12:16And that goes so far.
12:18I don't wanna be limited to this industry.
12:20I wanna be limitless.
12:21And especially with Jesus on my side.
12:23You give me chills when you say that.
12:24So, no seriously.
12:25And you said about keeping your mind, right?
12:29Having a good head on your shoulders.
12:31I think one of the things, cause I do a lot of self-reflecting and very introspective
12:40always and you know, it's not that I'm being hard on myself but I always wanna make sure
12:46you're looking in the mirror like, okay, did you really do your best?
12:49Was that really the highest version of that performance that you could have gave?
12:56What notes do you have for yourself?
12:59And so, one of the things that I realized just about like, when you're asking God and
13:05really like yourself because it's you who has to go out there and do it.
13:10So, when you're asking for what you want, I think we need to also remember, cause this
13:17is, you know, something that I don't think a lot of us actually process, that you have
13:23to be the person that is able to receive those things.
13:28And what do I mean by that?
13:29So, you ask for a whole bunch of money, right?
13:32And a whole bunch of success.
13:33But do you know how to operate with that capital?
13:37Do you know how to reinvest, play the game?
13:43Do you know how to make those dollars work for you?
13:47Cause the dollar has no value until you use it.
13:50So, you wanna make sure that you're also working on your insides while you have all these things
13:57on the outside.
13:58One of the things that I said is that I really wanna make music and create things that inspire
14:03people to action.
14:05Right?
14:06And so, then I'm out in the world and I'm seeing things that look real familiar.
14:10And I'm like, wait a minute.
14:11That's my thing.
14:13But also, it's like, well, that's what you said you wanted.
14:16That's what you said you wanted to do.
14:18You know what I'm saying?
14:19So, that energy of just like, oh, you're copying me or that's what you're here to do.
14:24It's like, people didn't know that they could run a four minute mile until they saw somebody
14:28else do it.
14:29Nobody could do it until the first person did it.
14:32And so, you have to change that energy and understand like, it's your job to keep unlocking
14:38doors.
14:39To keep, you know, showing people, especially people who look like you, that it's possible.
14:45And then you continue to build and move on to the next thing.
14:48Continue disrupting.
14:49Continue being a trailblazer.
14:51Yeah.
14:52And I just think you guys, the advice that I would give to anybody that's trying to be
14:55an influencer or trying to, you know, own their own businesses or just step out.
14:59All you got to do is just step out or you got to just do it.
15:02You just got to be consistent.
15:03You got to be determined.
15:04You got to be hungry.
15:05You know, you got to just step and dream big because again, we will fail.
15:10You know, you will have your moments where you are still and you're trying to figure out
15:14what do I do next?
15:15But all you got to do is keep going.
15:18Even when that little mind up, they're like, girl, you ain't going to do it.
15:21You ain't going to do it.
15:22No, you will.
15:23And you shall.
15:24And you can.
15:25So just step fast on that, y'all.
15:26Like y'all could do it.
15:27I don't know what everybody's trying to do in here, but just keep going.
15:31I love that.
15:32I love that.
15:33And then also too, rest.
15:36Like make sure you rest.
15:37Yes.
15:38Make sure you spend time with family.
15:40Make sure you take, like, you know, I'm not sure about you guys, but I'm just like,
15:44it's Thanksgiving, I'm getting my plate and taking my nap and then I'm on a business call.
15:49You know what I'm saying?
15:50It's like, I got stuff to do, but you got to make sure you take that pause.
15:54Spend time with your family.
15:56If you need a break, take a break.
15:57You know what I'm saying?
15:59I think my favorite part about this season, this time of year, is that nobody else is
16:04working and the business kind of like shuts down.
16:08So I have no excuse, you know what I'm saying, to like step out and take a phone call.
16:13Yeah.
16:14Where normally, you know, in my day to day, if my phone is ringing at dinner, I'm probably
16:18going to answer it.
16:19You know what I'm saying?
16:20Yeah.
16:21I think it's really important to just, like, make those memories at Christmas time.
16:26Make those memories at, you know, Thanksgiving.
16:29I don't know how y'all do Easter in y'all family.
16:31Yeah.
16:32Dress up in your plaid with your hat.
16:34I'm on that couch.
16:35With that robe on.
16:36With your honey.
16:37Right, right.
16:38Turkey leg.
16:39So I don't know, what about you guys, like, what do you have planned for the holidays?
16:43I feel like I'm always in motion, so I never get to see my family.
16:47Unless I'm going back home to see them.
16:50I live in LA and all my family lives in Massachusetts or Houston, like more towards the East Coast.
16:57So it's always going to be like a four to six hour flight anytime I want to go home and
17:01see them.
17:02And I feel like what I really try to do is just be all the way present when I'm there.
17:08Like I never, I try not to touch my phone at all.
17:11I try to just like have a personal moment with everybody where there's, if I pull them
17:16aside or like, you know, have like separate moments with my family because things are moving
17:22so fast and you really don't know how, you don't notice how old people are getting or
17:27until you go home and you're like, oh my God, you didn't look like that last time I was home.
17:31I haven't been home for six months.
17:33No, for real.
17:34Like my nephew's about to graduate high school.
17:36The kids get, the family gets older and it's like, you got to just detach from work.
17:42Yeah.
17:43Yeah.
17:44Any memories?
17:45I used to love my grandmama sweet potato pies.
17:48She made like these little, and you know, you know how you do in a black family, you go
17:54in that kitchen and you get you about four of them and put them up in the top of the pantry.
17:58Yeah.
17:59So I definitely miss that.
18:00I don't know.
18:01I got some memories, but my memories just be, I'm Jamaican.
18:04When the island people in that building.
18:07Yes.
18:08I don't know.
18:09Can I come to your house?
18:10You have to, girl.
18:11Nice.
18:12I think I go out.
18:13Yeah.
18:14I mean, for me, I don't know.
18:15I just hear a whole bunch of commotion going on, but that's my memory.
18:18Everybody talking loud over each other.
18:20Everybody out.
18:21Somebody hating on somebody.
18:22Why you gotta wear that outfit in the family thing?
18:24I'm like, let her be.
18:26My family is crazy.
18:29They're like, they're just, you're Puerto Rican, right?
18:31Half Puerto Rican, yeah.
18:32I have family that's like, but my favorite, I would say my grandfather on my mom's side,
18:37he's like real island, like real, not island, but real foreign, you know?
18:43So he, like, he's one of those people that you have to, he didn't know that I was anything
18:48who I am until he went to like another country and went to a wedding and somebody was like,
18:52Hey girl, what you got going on?
18:53He didn't care about nothing.
18:54He didn't care about any shows, any awards, any hit records, nothing until he went to
19:06that wedding.
19:07It's like he didn't believe in my career until he went to a wedding and somebody was like,
19:11I know her.
19:12Wow.
19:13That's funny.
19:14Because he's so old.
19:15He's, my grandfather's 90 years old, y'all.
19:17So like, he's 90.
19:18I'm so grateful to have him.
19:20I pray for him every single day and I'm so, so thankful to just have these moments still
19:25with my family.
19:26But he doesn't be on social media, so he doesn't know like anything that's going on
19:32outside of the five TV channels that he watches.
19:35So when he's like, and I go and see him, he's like, Miunga, you didn't tell me you're
19:41famous.
19:42And I'm like, you know, I don't really know what to say.
19:45Isn't that so awkward though when you go home and you just trying to like eat and chill
19:49and they want to ask you about everything.
19:51Like, oh, so what was it like?
19:52My uncle Googled my net worth at the kitchen table on Thanksgiving.
19:55Uh-uh.
19:56Yeah, it was so crazy.
19:57I was like, that's wrong, bro.
19:58Don't believe everything you did on the internet.
19:59Like, it's not even right.
20:01Yeah.
20:02I think that's what it is with family, honey.
20:03Because when I get home, they be like, Wiley.
20:05I'm like, go sit down.
20:08I don't want to do that right now.
20:09They be like, in the classroom.
20:10Look, in the classroom.
20:11I don't want to do that.
20:12Pick up and kill it and kill it.
20:14I'm trying to eat.
20:15Right, right, right.
20:16Are you cooking for Thanksgiving?
20:18I don't cook.
20:19Nothing?
20:20I mean, I do.
20:21I do.
20:22I do.
20:23A little salmon from time to time.
20:26You know, I cook to survive.
20:27I cook to survive.
20:28I feel that.
20:29You're going to get that chef right quick.
20:30I cook to survive.
20:31I need to.
20:32That's one thing my mama said.
20:33To keep a man V, you're going to have to know how to cook.
20:34I said, well, I ain't got one.
20:35So that's what we eat.
20:36You got a little time.
20:37I got a little time.
20:38I do.
20:39A little something.
20:40The rice fryer.
20:41What is it?
20:42The earth fryer?
20:43What is it?
20:44Air fryer?
20:45Oh my God.
20:46She said earth.
20:47You don't need to cook.
20:48No, you don't need to cook.
20:49Okay.
20:50No, seriously.
20:51I could do my salmon.
20:52I could do my turkey burgers.
20:53I could do my sweet potato fries.
20:54I could do, you know, like the do and goes.
20:56Can you do coconut curry chicken?
20:57You could.
20:58Do I do what?
20:59Coconut curry chicken.
21:00I don't do no.
21:01Coconut curry chicken.
21:02Oh, you said that last time.
21:03I got to come and get me a plate.
21:05I'll make it for you.
21:06I'll make it for you.
21:07Yes.
21:08I ain't doing that.
21:09If that got to do with grease and all that flipping and dipping and skipping, I'm not doing
21:13that.
21:14I'm not doing all of that.
21:15I'm not doing that.
21:16Well, I do.
21:17I got my little signature dishes that I'm always, you know, if ain't nobody else making
21:20it, I'm going to make it.
21:21Okay.
21:22A little banana pudding, you know.
21:24Okay.
21:25Macaroni and cheese.
21:26Okay.
21:27Sometimes I'll do the greens.
21:28I don't like to do the greens because the greens, that's like an all day.
21:32Take too long.
21:33Affair.
21:34I love that.
21:35I don't even know.
21:36It's just because you got to wash them and then cut them and then it's just, it's
21:39too much.
21:40Yeah.
21:41Absolutely.
21:42If you, listen, if you knew my mom, you would know how funny that is because I was
21:45just getting on them the other day.
21:46I was like, stop inviting my friends to the house when I'm not there.
21:50Girl.
21:51Don't do that.
21:52I don't like that.
21:53But she do.
21:54She be like, we got an extra room back there.
21:55Don't do that.
21:57I'm the one that sit on that couch waiting.
22:00I'm waiting on that cornbread.
22:02I'm with that robe and that varney.
22:04I'm watching Moesha.
22:05You know, I'm the family member that gets dressed, gets my plate and then gets undressed
22:13and goes to sleep.
22:14Like I'm not hanging out in the kitchen with y'all, talking.
22:17I'm going to eat and I'm going to go to sleep.
22:19I'm hanging out.
22:20Yeah, I'm hanging out.
22:21I'm falling asleep in the kitchen.
22:22I'm hanging out.
22:23Definitely not me.
22:24All right, y'all.
22:25What y'all finna do?
22:26Yeah.
22:27That's me.
22:28Yeah.
22:29I'm hanging out.
22:30I'm hanging out.
22:31What else we got going on?
22:33Hot topics.
22:34Let's get into the hot topics.
22:35Okay.
22:36Let's do that.
22:37Let's get into the hot topics, y'all.
22:38Favorite holiday song.
22:39Okay.
22:40First of all, I love the holidays.
22:42Absolutely love.
22:43Okay.
22:44If Mariah is the queen, I'm the princess because-
22:46Period.
22:47Christmas is what's made for me.
22:49Pun intended.
22:50My new song, Made For Me, is out right now.
22:52No period.
22:53So my favorite holiday song is Oh Holy Night, specifically Celine Dion version.
23:00It's just something about that.
23:01I just feel like Angel came down and just picked me up.
23:04I really just love the Christmas tree, the smell of the pine needles.
23:10No fake tree for me.
23:11I need the whole kit and caboodle, the whole shebang.
23:14We're trimming the tree.
23:15We're drinking eggnog.
23:16I love that.
23:17I'm so into it.
23:18That's my thing.
23:19Eggnog.
23:20I like that a lot.
23:21Spike eggnog.
23:22Regular eggnog.
23:23A little spike.
23:24Yeah.
23:25I love holidays.
23:26First of all, Christmas.
23:27Ooh.
23:28But you know my favorite, favorite, favorite, is Valentine's Day.
23:33Sorry.
23:34It's nothing to do right now, but it's Valentine's Day.
23:36You can't play with me on Valentine's Day.
23:38Why?
23:39I don't know.
23:40I just love, it's just like you gotta give me something.
23:43You gotta pick it up from CVS.
23:45I don't care.
23:46I have to see something red in my house.
23:48Pink, red.
23:49You gotta tell me you love me.
23:50You gotta tell me something.
23:51I have to have something on Valentine's Day.
23:53Okay, what's the best gift that you've ever received?
23:56A best?
23:57I don't know.
23:58So I love Jim Carrey.
24:00Jim Carrey's my favorite.
24:02This guy I was talking to at the time gave me so many flowers in my house.
24:07I walked in, it was so many flowers.
24:09And then Jim Carrey poster picture was sitting right there.
24:13In the middle of my hallway.
24:16Oh, that's sweet.
24:17And I was like, oh my God.
24:18So sweet.
24:19Remembered.
24:20I thought he was gonna give me Eddie Murphy.
24:21What I love if.
24:22You know?
24:23That's so sweet.
24:24So your favorite holiday is Valentine's Day?
24:27Yes.
24:28Mine's Thanksgiving.
24:29I see I'm still thinking about the food.
24:30Yeah.
24:31That's terrible.
24:32I'm terrible.
24:33Okay, so I'll take Christmas.
24:34I'm fine with that.
24:35I'm Christmas.
24:36I'm Christmas but Valentine's Day.
24:37Ain't got anything right now.
24:38Well, I like Christmas because you can get dressed for Christmas.
24:41Like Christmas I always feel like you can put a good look on.
24:44One thing about me, I love a good look.
24:46I mean, I'm definitely gonna give ugly sweater.
24:49Really?
24:50On Christmas.
24:51Yes.
24:52Corny.
24:53Like I like all of that corny stuff.
24:54Yeah.
24:55I'm definitely gonna give you brush no teeth, bonnet in a robe.
24:58Ugh.
24:59And a sock.
25:00Like when the food ready, where my gifts at.
25:02Like that's it.
25:03That's crazy.
25:04I ain't putting no star on the tree.
25:05No one's doing a look for Christmas or Thanksgiving?
25:07Child.
25:08Okay, if I'm going to my...
25:09This is what it is.
25:10I'm from Miami, right?
25:12If we gotta go somewhere, I literally, we'll go to the auntie and cousins and grandma house
25:16and auntie house and look fly.
25:17At home, give me that bonnet in that robe.
25:20At home, yeah.
25:21Like if I gotta go somewhere, it's always like get ready, auntie so and so is cooking
25:24at seven, then we'll get ready and get fly.
25:26But if I'm just chilling, I'm really like hair looking crazy, like bonnet me, robe me.
25:31Crusting your eye.
25:32Crusting my eye.
25:33Like foot dragging.
25:35If I am doing that, it's a nice, like it's a real good robe with a matching slipper.
25:40Come on now, Bia.
25:41But you're doing too much.
25:42No, but you know what?
25:43I believe it.
25:44I love the look, y'all.
25:45I'm committed to the look.
25:46Every time I see Bia, she is ranch, she be dressing.
25:49Okay?
25:50I'm committed to the look, you guys.
25:51Everywhere, everywhere.
25:52I had to give it to you.
25:53Always, from head to toe.
25:54No matter what.
25:55You'd be fine though.
25:56I love the look, y'all.
25:57It's like, how could we go to Thanksgiving without a look?
26:00I put together like a cute, you know, I might do like a little sweater, but I'm not getting
26:05dressed dressed.
26:06So what's the craziest thing that happened at y'all dinner table during Thanksgiving?
26:10The craziest thing?
26:11Well, I don't know.
26:13I don't think my chicken was cooked.
26:16Uh-uh.
26:17I was like, what chicken?
26:18Who did that chicken?
26:19You cooked it?
26:20I think I cooked it.
26:21That's why.
26:22I don't think I cooked it.
26:25I don't be sticking around long enough to see nothing crazy.
26:28I'm going to sleep.
26:29Oh, I know something.
26:31My grandfather always gets everybody wine drunk.
26:34Like, he gets everybody wine drunk.
26:36So by the time Thanksgiving or Christmas is over, somebody is passed out.
26:42Like in the food.
26:44That sounds like fun.
26:45Like face down on the table.
26:47Every time.
26:48That sounds like a lot of fun.
26:49Because he makes the wine by himself.
26:51What?
26:52So by hand.
26:53So people think that it's like light, it's not going to get them drunk.
26:56Three glasses, over with.
26:58Oh, see.
26:59Now that's why I want to come to your house.
27:01You should come.
27:02I want to try that.
27:03I would love that.
27:04See, and my mama a pastor, so all that glory to glory to glory.
27:07She just whipping up the little mashed potatoes.
27:09I'm like, mom, come on now.
27:10Give me some biggie, some Tupac, something.
27:13That's like, I mean, my holidays is lit always, but it's always something.
27:17I think the chicken for me.
27:19And I don't eat meat no more because of that.
27:21Really?
27:22Mm-mm.
27:23I just do all fish.
27:24I don't do no chicken.
27:25Very healthy.
27:26Yeah, I don't do none of that.
27:27I do a little lamb chop if I'm feeling lamby.
27:29If I'm feeling lamby.
27:30If I'm feeling lamby, I do the lamby.
27:32If I'm feeling turkey burgers, I do that.
27:33But when it comes to chicken and pork and beef, that's not me.
27:37Shrimp, I don't do shrimp either.
27:38See, I need to get like you.
27:39I don't do lobsters.
27:40I don't do, I just do-
27:41No shrimp and lobster towers.
27:42I just do-
27:43No shrimp and lobster towers.
27:44Smeppers, salmon.
27:45Girl.
27:46My he, my he, that's me.
27:47I don't do no shrimp.
27:48I don't do lobsters.
27:49I don't do that.
27:50And I'm in that chamber.
27:51I can't relate.
27:52Yeah.
27:53Yeah.
27:54Like I be eating.
27:55Look, I had some bacon this morning.
27:56It was so good.
27:57See, turkey bacon would be good for me.
27:58I'd do that.
27:59But that'll work.
28:00That's like girl math.
28:01Somebody brings you and be like, what do you want to eat?
28:03I don't know.
28:04I'm hungry.
28:05What do you want?
28:06I don't know.
28:07I'm gonna get whatever you get.
28:08I'm listening.
28:09I'm like the expert at girl math.
28:11Okay.
28:12If I go, okay, let's use Black Friday since it's coming up.
28:15I will buy 20 pairs of shoes on sale and it only equals one pair of shoes.
28:23You know, if I had got it at the regular, that's a girl math.
28:26You know what I'm saying?
28:27I just feel like there's nothing, you know, there's nothing wrong with just thinking ahead.
28:33You know what I'm saying?
28:34Cause you never know when you're gonna need.
28:36Oh, this is a cute little, you know, blue boot.
28:39You never know when you're gonna need a blue boot and then you run across a nice little
28:42blue jacket and you're like, oh, see, I'm glad I got that boot two years ago that I never
28:46wore.
28:47That happens to me all the time.
28:49I don't be catching the sales though.
28:52You gotta, but see, you gotta know when they are.
28:54You gotta stay up on it.
28:55Cause you can't, if you're, if you trying to catch the sale, that means you already too
28:59late.
29:00Cause somebody done rummaged through and got all the good stuff.
29:02I be ready to get it at that grocery store with a two for head, two dogs for the head,
29:05almond milk.
29:06I don't know about the mall thing.
29:07Cause I just be buying stuff.
29:08So I don't be looking.
29:09So my mom be like, there's a sale rack V.
29:11So I don't know.
29:12It's really online for me.
29:13Online.
29:14Okay.
29:15Cause I hate trying on clothes.
29:16Oh, I love online.
29:17Yeah.
29:18I can't shop online.
29:19Y'all.
29:20I gotta fit it.
29:21I want my stuff to be.
29:22Get a little tailored, you know?
29:24I know.
29:25But then I gotta wait for them to do that.
29:26I gotta call you.
29:27Just take it to the driveway.
29:28I know.
29:29They do that.
29:30But then I gotta look at you, do it.
29:31And I'm ready to put it on now.
29:32And then I don't like it.
29:33Then it's just like, I'm such a like, I'm hard.
29:34She be in that robe.
29:35She be in that robe.
29:36I be in that robe.
29:37And robe and bonnet.
29:39Okay.
29:40So question for you, Ms. Mamas.
29:43Dating.
29:44Your dating life.
29:46What is dating like in 2023 and beyond?
29:51Oh, dating.
29:52It's very ghetto.
29:54It's very ghetto, you guys.
29:56Like, I'm a very like private person.
29:59I'm very, I like a little mystique, you know?
30:02I'm from the era of not living your life like every two seconds on your story or social
30:08media.
30:09I feel like that's like a Gen Z thing kinda.
30:11And I was in the era of like people keep things to themselves.
30:15So I'm still learning how to let people into my life, like my personal life.
30:21Yeah.
30:22While still keeping my personal life for me.
30:26But it's very ghetto, yeah.
30:28I don't like dating.
30:29I don't like it.
30:30It's treacherous.
30:31Oof.
30:32It's not a vibe really for me.
30:34Like, I like to be single.
30:36I like to just be by myself.
30:38Catch a little vibe.
30:39Every now and then.
30:40Nothing wrong with it.
30:41Yeah.
30:42Turn into a no-no.
30:43I just be up and down.
30:45Like, I be like, I like you Monday.
30:46And then that Tuesday hit?
30:48It's like, I really said that to you on Monday?
30:50Yeah.
30:51I did not record you.
30:53Like, I be like, ooh, Lord.
30:54And then again, in the industry, y'all already know me.
30:57I'm just be like, I get it.
30:59But I don't know.
31:00I'm a very private person too.
31:02Like, yeah, we'll be on social media.
31:03I see what y'all see.
31:04But behind closed door, I be like, ugh.
31:06I don't know.
31:07It's like, it's just the dudes.
31:08Some of the dudes be too moody.
31:09And I'm moody too.
31:10And I'm like, like I said, I like you on Sunday.
31:12Then that Monday hit.
31:14Now I play like, I got a flu now.
31:17Cause I don't want to go out with you.
31:18And I feel like everything is so, it's like, you know, it's like a big web.
31:23Yeah.
31:24Like you put someone's name and then it's like 10 people's names that you can attach to them.
31:27So it's like, where do you find a fossil?
31:30A clean slate.
31:31Damn.
31:32A clean slate.
31:33Some of the dudes don't know how to, I gotta have somebody that know how to pray.
31:36Yes.
31:37That part.
31:38I mean, let's can't have you around me if you don't know how to pray now.
31:41I don't want to listen to Uzi all day.
31:44I don't want to do that.
31:47Like, I love Uzi, but I don't want to do that all day.
31:49Like, let me, some substance.
31:51I need to hear something.
31:52Make love to my mind.
31:53Cause the draws you might get.
31:55You might get.
31:57But if you just make love to my mind and hear me and be still with me and talk to me,
32:03I don't want to hear about how many views I just got on that Peanut Mama video.
32:06I want to know about what's going on right now in front of me.
32:08Let's be present here.
32:09Right.
32:10In the media, my phone is down.
32:12So I don't know.
32:13Right now in this season, like Bia said, it's a little ghetto for me.
32:16But I like, I like people that can actually make you a better version of yourself.
32:20So like if I'm, if I'm getting to know somebody and I'm dating somebody and there's, there's
32:23no contribution to me being, and I don't mean like financially.
32:27It's more so like, it's, it's always a, like a spiritual or mental thing.
32:32Like make me want to be a better version of me, which I already feel like I do that anyways.
32:37But like, at least inspire me.
32:38Cause if you can inspire me, like if I don't see you going to the gym every day and I'm going
32:42to the gym four times a week, then like, what can you do for me?
32:46You have to be in a line.
32:47Like you got to make me be a better version of myself.
32:49Yeah.
32:50Or help me see a better, like make me go a little bit harder, but just by your actions.
32:55That's, that's what I would look for in like a man right now.
32:57And I think that's where the unsure comes.
32:59I love that though.
33:00Yeah.
33:01Yeah.
33:02I think that's where the, me being unsure comes.
33:03Cause if I don't see the person that's trying to talk to me, hit the gym.
33:06And you know, I love bosses, period.
33:08Yeah.
33:09You gotta be a boss.
33:10You gotta really like go crazy on what you love to do.
33:13But for me, if I'm talking to somebody, you really have to like show up in that gym.
33:17You know, you gotta really go crazy in that gym.
33:19Like you really gotta, your lifestyle has to be what you preach about and how you look.
33:24I can't, if I'm over here working at, and I see you on that couch, that chicken.
33:28Or I'm gonna piss me off.
33:29I'm going to work.
33:30In that ice cream.
33:31If I'm going to work, you know, going to the studio four or five times a week, I'm
33:36doing shows and I'm barely sleeping three, four days in a row.
33:39And you sitting on the couch playing video games.
33:41It's not gonna work.
33:42Right.
33:43Right.
33:44You gotta get up.
33:45Well, I'm not gonna lie.
33:46I'm glad I don't have to do it.
33:47I don't have to date.
33:48I'm married.
33:49I've been married for a long time.
33:50Let's go.
33:51Yeah.
33:52I feel sorry for you guys that have to go out here.
33:54No, for real, because it is crazy outside.
33:58Yes.
33:59I will say though, like, I think it's interesting, this whole idea of like, launching your relationship,
34:08like the soft launch.
34:10Baby, I don't want you knowing nothing about nothing.
34:12For what?
34:13Why am I telling you anything?
34:14Yeah.
34:15The only time you're gonna know that I'm with somebody is when I'm sending you the link
34:19to my registry for you to go ahead and support us any way that you can.
34:24Yeah.
34:25But it's not, you know, a relationship is between two people.
34:28Yeah.
34:29And once you do that, I feel like you invite other people, eyes, opinions into your sacred
34:36place, and that's not, in my opinion, that's not conducive to a healthy sort of exchange
34:45between you and your person.
34:47So I definitely don't agree.
34:49I agree with like being private, keep it to yourself, you know, and that's all things
34:55in my personal life, not just my relationship.
34:58If it's not correlating to the music or something that has something to do with my platform.
35:03Now, if me and my husband have like a couples thing, you know, like a podcast or something
35:09like that, if we were to ever do that, I understand.
35:12But just like parading my relationship, I don't understand it.
35:17Like, let me show the air.
35:18I feel like I hate that about social media right now.
35:22It's like people, I don't even know what's genuine anymore, what's just like for social
35:29media, you know?
35:30Right.
35:31I think that's the shift, like a little bit of the shift that you were talking about
35:34earlier.
35:35Yeah.
35:36Yeah.
35:37I think a lot of us are getting sort of fatigued by the information.
35:41Like we just know everybody's business.
35:43Yes.
35:44All the time.
35:45Oh my God.
35:46And there's some people who were just like, tag me out the group chat.
35:50Yeah.
35:51I don't want to know.
35:52And I definitely feel like, you know, we're moving into a period of like authenticity,
35:57pureness, clean, spirit, clean, just like a purity of intention.
36:05Right.
36:06And I think we're beginning to be able to see through and discern when we're being like sold,
36:12when somebody is trying to push products on you, when people don't know who they are for
36:19real, you can tell.
36:21And I think we just are looking for leadership and people who are like sure about who they
36:28are and where they're going.
36:29Because that's what we want to like follow for lack of a better word.
36:34Um, those are the people that we want to follow in their footsteps.
36:38Yeah.
36:39Right.
36:40We don't want to follow someone who's unsure.
36:41We don't want to, you know, stand behind or, or put energy and focus into people, things,
36:48um, ideas that aren't for the good of humanity.
36:53Yes.
36:54For the good of the world.
36:55I mean, we see how people are boycotting, you know, left and right.
36:58Oh, you know, Oh, you don't want to serve, you know, people who look like me.
37:01Cool.
37:02We're not going there.
37:03You know what I'm saying?
37:04And it's just like, we're, we're understanding that there is power, um, and authenticity and
37:08power in us like collectively deciding that we want more, you know, we don't just want
37:15to keep consuming mindlessly.
37:17Um, because I think that's just because we do it so much.
37:20Like why only us?
37:21Why is that?
37:22Why do they want just us to consume mindlessly?
37:24Like just, they, it's almost like social media sometimes in society uses the thing, the
37:31people that we relate to, to get to us in a way where it's like, take us back.
37:36You know what I'm saying?
37:37It's a distraction.
37:38It's a distraction from like all the growth and everything that we've been just, I mean,
37:45especially being on this side of it.
37:46I see like a lot of times, like, um, for example, I went to one music fest and I saw the little
37:52Kim moment when she took that.
37:55Um, she had like this leather harness that kept slipping down and she just was like, you
38:00know what?
38:01When I saw the headlines was like, Lil' Kim takes off her panties.
38:04I'm just like, that is not what happened.
38:06He does.
38:07That is not what happened.
38:08So it's like, I'm just realizing more and more even, and I'm sure a lot of us are, that
38:12what we're seeing in these blogs, these headlines, on the news, it's not, it's not real.
38:18It's not accurate.
38:19And so I think like, we're becoming more, we're taking ownership over our focus and
38:26our attention, you know, cause after a while it just becomes like hours of this.
38:31You know, how much time have you put into your business that day?
38:34How much time have you put into like your meditation and your prayer, your self care?
38:39How much time have you spent talking with your friends and family?
38:42Um, how much time to have you spend planning your future?
38:45And you just wasting time doing that.
38:47You know, we love social media.
38:49I know I'm a, I'll be on TikTok for hours and hours, but I always like try to make sure
38:56I've gotten everything done that I need to do for that day before I start just kind of
39:02like mindlessly consuming.
39:05Yeah.
39:06My headlines be real though, you know, that breakup happened, that breakup happened.
39:10Um, so what about this?
39:11Like, like he's just not into you.
39:13Have you guys experienced that?
39:15Like when someone just says like, baby, that's not it.
39:17And he ain't into you either.
39:18We think we'd be the ones that be like, Oh, I'm into him, but he might not be into you.
39:21Have you guys experienced that?
39:22I feel like we can only see that when it's with other people.
39:24Yeah.
39:25I could see it for my girl, but I can't necessarily, or, you know, before I'm not dating anymore.
39:30And like I said, I've been locked in.
39:32Yeah.
39:33But when I was, you know, out there, I couldn't see him like, Oh, but, but I love him.
39:39You know what I'm saying?
39:40Like my, one of my favorite, uh, Kiki Palmer, um, clips that she was like, but I love him
39:45because we do that.
39:46Right.
39:47Yeah.
39:48But I just feel like, you know, I think we were, we were talking over in the corner just
39:50about, you know, when it's not right, you know, when it's not right, but you just be
39:55overlooking, you know, bypassing the red flags.
39:58But he cute, but he got money, girl, you know, follow your heart.
40:02It's like, what are the signs though?
40:04We need to normalize, like not falling in love with the idea of what we think someone
40:09could be or what they could grow into and more so just accept them for who they are.
40:16Jesus.
40:17At that moment.
40:18And no, like, there's no telling what that person is going to be like tomorrow, two years,
40:22three years, five years from now.
40:23So the only thing that you can do is accept them and use your discernment.
40:27Yeah.
40:28I'm learning to just accept people for what they are, the, as they come in, you know,
40:32and use my best discernment because not everybody has that relationship with God.
40:37When I see my discernment ringing off, I know that that's God.
40:40Like, I know that it's like, not everybody has this, not you, you know, you see people
40:46like they'll, it's like, they'll look like a hamster in a wheel because they have no discernment.
40:50Yeah.
40:51And it's like, when you're, when you're really close to God and you, you have that protect,
40:55you're protected.
40:56Yeah.
40:57You just feel it right away.
40:58Like, I think it's also knowing what you want.
41:00Right.
41:01Like, um, I saw this quote last night that was like, don't be so thirsty that you drink
41:06from any cup.
41:07Ooh.
41:08Mm.
41:09And it's like, you know, haha.
41:11No, for sure.
41:12I love it.
41:13Literally like you walk in the room and you're like, hmm, is there guys in here?
41:16Oh my God.
41:17Somebody like me.
41:18I'm pretty, you know, I'm bad tonight.
41:20And it's just like, okay, if somebody walks up to you and gives you a compliment, thank
41:25you.
41:26That's it.
41:27It doesn't have to go.
41:28You know what I'm saying?
41:29And I feel like we don't, we don't be thinking like that.
41:32And also too, it's like, you don't know what you want.
41:34So, any person that walks by or offers you any kind of attention, you're like, hey,
41:41oh my God, you know, let's go on a date.
41:44After the first date, I love him.
41:45He's the one.
41:46Like, nah.
41:47You know what I'm saying?
41:48Like, focus on you.
41:49Yeah.
41:50Get yourself together.
41:51You're supposed to fall in love with yourself and then they fall in love with you loving
41:55yourself.
41:56Yes.
41:57You know what I'm saying?
41:58And I wish I had learned that earlier, like younger.
42:01Cause we tend to like where I used to just dive in and like, give you everything and
42:06you know, do you need anything?
42:07Are you hungry?
42:08Let me cook you a five course meal.
42:09It's like, no ma'am.
42:10No.
42:11Yeah.
42:12You know what I'm saying?
42:13And I think it's so hard, especially for me, because like I said, I've dated and I've
42:18went on dates and I did the whole little whoop whoop, shebang bang, tee tee tee.
42:21But I think, so it's so hard when you are such a PK and my mother is a pastor and she sees beyond
42:28what I see and then she be like, uh uh, my discernment kicking in and I don't think that's
42:33the one.
42:34And then I may like him.
42:35And I'm like, mom.
42:36Yes.
42:37I'm like, mom, I like him though.
42:38And then me, I'm so and so year old.
42:39Like, let me do me.
42:40She's like, Veena, I'm telling you, that ain't the one.
42:43You keep forcing it.
42:44And you know, so I think it's so hard when, and I think too, we have our own relationship
42:49with God, you know, so you got to pray, ask God to show you, show me what my mama see.
42:54Cause I just see somebody fine and he treat me good.
42:58You know, you gotta, he's respectable.
42:59He got, he hustles.
43:00He's, he does his thing and he loves God.
43:02But my mom is like, I'm seeing something and I'm telling you that ain't the one.
43:06And I do listen.
43:07Like everybody know me, my friends, my team know.
43:09One thing about Miss Yolanda, Yolanda Champagne.
43:11I love my mama down.
43:13So in anything she says to me, like I take heed and I'm like, all right, mom.
43:16Like I dumped him.
43:17Like Kwame say he don't like me no more anyway.
43:19So cause of you, you know, but I think it's like, I gotta listen to her, but it's so hard.
43:23Cause when you do like someone and you want to like try it is all.
43:27And my mom's like my best friend.
43:28So she's like, baby, I'm telling you, I don't like him.
43:30And I'm like, mom, why?
43:31His shoes too big.
43:32Your kids.
43:33Like, you know what I'm like?
43:34Okay.
43:35So I think it's hard, but I always go with my gut.
43:38And if my discernment is like you said, like off, then it's like, okay, I don't, I can't
43:41see.
43:42Cause right now we're in a position where we have to have someone beside us.
43:46That's going to hold us up because in this industry can cause the anxiety, the depression,
43:51the worriness.
43:52One day you up, one day you down, one day you in between, whatever it is, whatever motion
43:56you have.
43:57So you do need somebody that's going to beside you to lead the way and help you instead
44:00of going off of looks and what motion they have.
44:02Cause they motion may die down and it's now it's up to you to keep carrying them.
44:06So I think my mom looks at that, like, I don't want you to get into that space.
44:09You need to ask God to whoever is for you going to come and y'all going to build what
44:14y'all need to build then.
44:15So I, right now I'm just in a space of like, if you meant for me, you're going to be, you're
44:19going to be here for the long run, longevity.
44:21Yeah.
44:22I always know like what's good relationships and friendships by how close or farther away
44:27they take me from God.
44:28So like that, that's with anything.
44:31That's a friendship.
44:32Like I cannot even have a friendship without, if there's, if God's not in my friendship.
44:36Come on.
44:37Like I pray with my friends every day.
44:39Every day.
44:40I cover them.
44:42I hope they are protected.
44:43I pray that they're protected.
44:44Like we love each other, you know?
44:46So it's like, if I don't feel that in my friends and my relationships and my business affairs,
44:52it's not going to work.
44:53It's not going to work.
44:54I done turned gigs down cause of that.
44:55Yeah.
44:56I don't want to do that.
44:57Cause I already see where it's going and I don't see God in that.
45:00And then, you know, I didn't send devotions to you.
45:02Like, yeah, I don't play about them devotions.
45:04Now we going to send that, you know, we going to read that, you know?
45:07So I don't play.
45:08On a day I really needed it too.
45:10Like, you know, you got those friends that they send you a prayer on a day that you're
45:13like, wow, I really need this day.
45:14The Lord knew what I needed.
45:15Look.
45:16Hello.
45:17I love that.
45:18So you guys, we are like wrapped up.
45:20Like we are wrapped up.
45:21No, I want to keep talking.
45:22But before that, before we go questioning, we got some Q and A's that's going to come
45:26up and that's going to access.
45:28Oh yes.
45:29The mic over here.
45:30The mic right here to the right.
45:32Don't be shy.
45:33Hey girl.
45:34Hey girl.
45:35What's your name?
45:36My name is Karis Nelson.
45:38Hi Karis.
45:39Love y'all.
45:40So my question is going to be, um, you guys kind of spoke on it briefly and I can run
45:44this panel.
45:45I can tell that y'all are some God fearing women.
45:46So what are some things that you do or what are some essentials that you would say that
45:50kind of keeps y'all grounded in an industry where it's so easy to lose yourself?
45:55I'm definitely renewing my mind every single day.
46:00Um, you know, I'm listening to audio books and, um, podcasts and, you know, just teachings,
46:10different teachings to remind myself who I am, where I come from, where my help comes
46:16from.
46:17Um, and just understanding like, I don't know if you've ever heard of like having an internal
46:23locus of control, meaning I am the master of my destiny and not things are always happening
46:31to me.
46:32I feel like that's where you kind of start losing yourself when you feel like you don't
46:36have any, um, say, um, in your journey.
46:41So, I mean, for me, it's always just like consuming more and more positive things.
46:46Um, I think, like I said in the beginning of this, uh, uh, conversation that it's just
46:53a shift been happening.
46:54So like sis said, like every day we should be renewing our minds because like I told my
46:59team, the same prayer we used to get here, it ain't the same prayer today.
47:04You have to change your language up just a little bit more.
47:07Mm-hmm.
47:08Okay.
47:09Because when you, 2018 can't be what 2023 is doing for you.
47:12You have to ask God for some different things in your life.
47:14So I think for me, I got to switch my focus now and really ask God, where is it that you
47:19want me to be in for the next season?
47:21And like she said, reading books, you know, getting a new devotional book, you know, working
47:26out, hanging out with my friends, you know, people that's going to, you know, feed off of
47:31me and I feed off of them in the creative space.
47:34Yeah.
47:35For me, um, I feel like I just try to move with as much intention as possible behind everything.
47:41So whether that's like anything that I'm doing, I just, it's intentional.
47:45I have to know like, I'm coming from a positive, good, pure place.
47:51Yeah.
47:52And that's the only way that I stay grounded.
47:54Like really just that and God.
47:56I pray a lot.
47:57I pray so much.
47:58For sure.
47:59Hi.
48:00Hey ladies.
48:01My name is Simone Gathers.
48:03My question is pertaining to once you've reached these new heights of success and you've
48:08discovered that you have like a calling on your life and in the particular career path,
48:14how do you deal with and navigate different jealousy energies or like energies of animosity
48:21towards you and the new heights that you've reached?
48:24Because I feel like personally, sometimes I get caught up in those like jealousy energies
48:29and like animosity energies and I'm, I go back and I kind of like second doubt myself
48:34or like second guess myself.
48:35So how do you deal with that?
48:36Discernment.
48:37You got to have that discernment on.
48:39You got to know who's for you and who's, who's that.
48:42Right?
48:43And that discernment got to be activated every time.
48:45My team told me today, you, you, you got to stay strong because you're the one who feels
48:49and fuel people.
48:50And some people when you, it's time to call on folks, they're not around.
48:53And I think too, when you're in this industry, you need to know who's who.
48:57You need to know who's jealous of you.
48:59You know, you know who's hating on you.
49:00You need to know what the business is.
49:02Who's not, you know, all of that.
49:04But it goes by your internal and your discernment.
49:06That spirit inside of you that's telling you that ain't it, you know, or they're, they're
49:10not for you.
49:11Right.
49:12So you have that discernment got to be activated at all times.
49:14I don't care what room you in, McDonald's.
49:16I don't care what room you in, you at Lenox Mall, baby.
49:19I don't know who's going to shave me today, but I feel it and my discernment got to be
49:23on.
49:24I agree too.
49:25And I think it's important to know, but also for me, and I totally feel where you're
49:30coming from because I used to think that that mattered.
49:32But now it's like, that doesn't contribute to my goal.
49:37It doesn't get me across the finish line.
49:40So it doesn't matter.
49:41And I used to, you know, be like, well, what, you know, I wanted, I wanted to understand
49:45like, well, why, you know, why are you mad at me?
49:48Why does she, why is he, it doesn't actually, um, it has nothing to do with you.
49:55It's a reflection of who that person is.
49:57And so now it's like, oh, you know, you're not, you're not quite there yet.
50:03You're not, you're underdeveloped.
50:04And I don't mean that in a, in a, in a shady way.
50:08It's just sort of like, almost like a beacon.
50:10Um, we're like, okay, that's a person who is not in alignment with me and my highest
50:16purpose.
50:17So thank you for identifying that and helping me identify that.
50:20And I wish you the best and move on, you know, cause I think maybe you might still be
50:25like have an attachment.
50:27Yeah.
50:28To that person.
50:29Like see the good in them basically.
50:30I mean, that's not, you know, unless you are a therapist, that's not your job.
50:34Your job is to be great, shine your light.
50:37You know what I'm saying?
50:38And that's what you should focus on.
50:40Thank you ladies.
50:41You're welcome.
50:42Don't wear all them book bags now.
50:44All that energy on them book bags.
50:46Hi.
50:47I love those pants.
50:48They're so cute.
50:50Um, my name is Naya.
50:51And, um, yes, as it sounds like you guys are very, uh, God offering women, which is
50:57beautiful.
50:58Um, and I feel like there's nothing more disruptive than when God is telling you to do something.
51:04Um, because I feel like when God tells you to do something, it's in the most uncomfortable
51:11situation sometimes.
51:13Um, and so I just wanted to know if you guys had any very personal experiences where God
51:19was specifically telling you to do something and you're like, I just don't know, Lord.
51:25I don't know if that's like, is it you or is it maybe I should step away?
51:29Like, I don't know.
51:30But do you have any personal experiences that come to your mind?
51:33It's like, God is telling me to do this thing, but I don't know if I really should.
51:38I have an experience like that I would love to share.
51:41Um, I, right when I first moved to Miami, when I, right when I signed my, I say my first
51:46record deal, I just met Pharrell at the time and I was working in like a mall.
51:50I had, I hadn't really cracked off with the music yet.
51:53And I went to church.
51:55Somebody at my, at my job was like, let me bring you to church every week.
51:58They're like, let me bring you to church.
51:59Let me bring you to church.
52:00Let me bring you to church.
52:01I feel like you need it.
52:02And, and I wasn't super spiritual at this time.
52:04I did not pray daily.
52:05I was not tapped into my higher spirituality or God at all.
52:11And they brought me to church.
52:12And the message that first time I went to church was, um, it was about having a God dream.
52:17And it was like, they were like, if you are trying to do what you want to do for manmade
52:22things, like, you know, money, jewelry, popularity, it's not, it's not, you're never going to be
52:28successful.
52:29Yeah.
52:30Like, fueled by all the wrong things, you have to be, you have to serve your God dream.
52:33And until that day, I never knew what my purpose, what my calling, what my God dream was.
52:37I felt like that sermon was for me.
52:39I felt like I, I left crying that day and I was like, I'm not doing this for the right
52:43reasons.
52:44Like, what is my higher, what is my message?
52:47What, what, what, why am I not moving intentionally with what I'm speaking and the energy that I'm putting
52:52out into the world, what I want people to feel when they listen to me?
52:55Yeah.
52:56Um, that, yeah, I feel like that was, I had to share that with y'all.
52:59Yeah.
53:00I have, I have that experience all the time where I'm getting like little God whispers,
53:04I call them.
53:05And one thing I will say is like, and I tell my team this all the time is like, I knew
53:11better than that.
53:12I knew better than that.
53:13And I should have listened to my gut.
53:15I should have listened to my heart.
53:16Because whenever I go with my gut is when God puts you in, or I'll speak on me, God has
53:23put me in positions to where I'm like, why is nobody here?
53:27Like what's going on?
53:28Why am I by myself?
53:30But then I get this amazing moment.
53:32It's almost like a miracle happens.
53:34And the only person who can get the glory is God, you know?
53:39And so, and I love that.
53:41I love that.
53:42Cause it's just like, you know, a person, people, humans, we love to try to like say,
53:48well, you wouldn't have this if it wasn't for me.
53:50You know, I put you in this position.
53:52And what I love about being out there in the wilderness is that I know without a shadow
53:57of a doubt, I heard God's voice.
54:00I follow the instruction, walked on faith because I didn't know what I was doing.
54:05And then I got the win.
54:07It's all glory goes to God.
54:10And once you do that one time, you'll get comfortable doing it again.
54:14You get comfortable doing it again.
54:15And then you'll get to the place where if it ain't lining up with what God told you,
54:19you ain't even trying to hear that.
54:21You know what I'm saying?
54:22Like, you know what I'm saying?
54:23But that's just because you haven't exercised it enough.
54:26That's it.
54:27You just have to keep, you know what I'm saying?
54:29Do it the first time.
54:30Do it the second time.
54:31And then it'll gradually get easier and you'll get more and more responsibility.
54:36So just one step at a time.
54:38Yeah.
54:39Girl, we got to tell God, yes, about 10 times each day.
54:41Each day.
54:42You know?
54:43And change is really good.
54:44I was so scared.
54:45This is when I, last year or two years ago, I think 2021, I was transitioning from someone
54:50that was helping me in my business and it was so hard to do.
54:53But that's when my faith had to be activated.
54:56And from that on, like Sis said, I give all the glory to God because from 2020, actually
55:02from 2017 since I started on social media, I've been busy since.
55:06But when that season comes where you have to shift and you have to pivot and you have
55:11to make those decisions, you just got to say, God, I need you to intervene.
55:15I need you to, you know, I need to cast my cares onto you because I can't do this by myself.
55:20I can't lean on my own understanding no more.
55:22I got to give it to you.
55:23And once you do that and you tell God, yes, and he starts shifting the atmosphere for
55:28you, you have to be ready.
55:29Because even with friendships too, it'd be so hard to leave people.
55:33And God be shifting some things and you be like, well, God, I know when I prayed, I said
55:38get away from Christina and now I'm sad because Christina gone and I need Christina.
55:42But you done already told God you want Christina to go out your life.
55:45You know, you've been complaining about Christina.
55:47Now you miss Christina.
55:48Which one is it?
55:49And that's called a double mind.
55:51That's called a double minded person and he's unstable in all things.
55:56And let me tell you, I was listening to that sermon last night because I could be that
56:00too in business.
56:01Like, okay, I said yes to this thing.
56:03Now I told so and so I don't want to do it.
56:05And it's like, girl, what's the issue?
56:07So you have to really, you got to really figure that out.
56:10And vice versa too.
56:11Yeah.
56:12Yeah.
56:13You'll say, you know, I want to be healthy, but then you go drinking, you know, every night.
56:16Right.
56:17Or you say, I want to be respected, but then you take any little things somebody give you.
56:21Right.
56:22You know what I'm saying?
56:23Or I want to be, for me, one of my struggles, I want to be an artist, but then I'm still writing
56:27songs.
56:28Right.
56:29They call me, you know, we got a camp going on in Jamaica.
56:32I'm like, Ooh, Ooh, I want to go.
56:34But you know what I'm saying?
56:35So it's like, don't be double minded.
56:37Yeah.
56:38And also when you do get it, when you do get that success, let's not turn our focus towards
56:44people and all of those people that, Oh my God, you so amazing.
56:47You so great.
56:48You, you the best.
56:49You so funny.
56:50You so, you know, you so fly.
56:52Let's keep our focus here.
56:54You know what I'm saying?
56:55Yeah.
56:56Because this is hard not to get distracted.
56:59I will tell you that it's literally like, um, have you ever been to church late and you
57:03walk in and everybody do this?
57:06Yeah.
57:07That's exactly what it feels like when you go from just focus and keep your head down
57:11from obscurity to like everybody knowing who you are and then now add cameras, flashing
57:19lights, and then add a bunch of voices in your ear.
57:22And it is, it's like, it could be so distracting.
57:25So you have to just keep your focus.
57:27Keep your focus there.
57:28Yeah.
57:29Okay.
57:30Appreciate y'all.
57:32Wonderful question.
57:33Good luck.
57:34God bless you.
57:35Yes.
57:36God bless you.
57:37This has been great, ladies.
57:38Yes.
57:39Yes.
57:40I love how much we just talked about our faith.
57:41Yes.
57:42Awesome.
57:43Yes.
57:44I love it.
57:45This was such a great conversation.
57:46And I hope you guys leave with some of these gems and jewels from my girl Bia, Money Long,
57:53and myself.
57:54And thank y'all so much.
57:55This is If Not For My Girls season five.
57:57Yes.
57:58You know, presented by Coke Zero Sugar.
58:00And thank y'all so much, ladies.
58:02This has been-
58:03Thank you so much.
58:05What y'all do.
58:06Thank you guys.
58:07How y'all disrupt.
58:08Yes.
58:09Right.
58:10How y'all disrupt.
58:11Yes, ladies.
58:12And remember, a delay is never denial, honey.
58:13Just keep on going.
58:14Keep pushing.
58:15It's not for my girl.
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