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00:00Hey, terrific.
00:00We got a big star on the hotline, Anthony.
00:03A big star.
00:03Who's this?
00:04Nice.
00:04Jim Brewer's playing Mulcahy's in Wontaw.
00:07Thanks for visiting us, Jim.
00:09Damn.
00:11Shunned out.
00:12I'm just kidding.
00:12Like a dirty Mexican.
00:14Triple A?
00:15What's up, guys?
00:15It's the game.
00:17Hey, what's going on?
00:18We are so happy to hear you.
00:21I'm going to go check out Stinky.
00:21You're back in the WWF, what, Monday?
00:23I am back Monday, yeah.
00:25Nice.
00:267th, Madison Square Garden.
00:27You guys going to come?
00:28Actually, no.
00:29You're not going to beat us up, are you?
00:31You're not going?
00:31No, we're asking a question.
00:33Are you going to beat us up?
00:34Not if you come to the show.
00:36Well, we've got to come to the show.
00:38We had it out with your ex.
00:40We had it out with your new lady.
00:43It's been an ugly soap opera on our show with Triple H.
00:46Who did you have it out with?
00:47Well, we had...
00:50I've been stuck in Birmingham, so I haven't been able to hear the show.
00:53I've been there for eight months.
00:54Actually, we treated Stephanie with nothing but respect.
00:57We love Stephanie.
00:58We just wanted to get some info out of her, and she wasn't budging whatsoever.
01:02Sure.
01:02And then we had...
01:04We can't say China.
01:05Jamie?
01:06No, we had China on, and we went at her.
01:09We kind of talked to her about the situation.
01:13Boy.
01:14Boy, that's got to be tough, man.
01:16Was she in the studio?
01:17No, she was on the phone.
01:18She wouldn't come in.
01:18Well, pretty lucky for you guys.
01:20She got a football, yes.
01:20Well, Triple H, I'll be completely honest with you.
01:23When we found out we were going to have China, she wanted to come in studio, but we wanted
01:26to ask some of these questions.
01:27So we said, maybe we'd be better off if she called from the hotel.
01:32Because we are a bunch of pussies when it comes down to it.
01:34Yeah, good thinking.
01:35Yeah, you know, she kind of made it sound a little bit like, and I'm sure, you know,
01:40she's a little bitter.
01:43She made it sound like the reason she was let go, kind of, sort of, part of it, was that
01:50her ex-boyfriend was sleeping with the boss's daughter.
01:53Was sleeping with the boss's daughter.
01:55Listen, have you ever heard a woman break up with somebody and then not have a disgruntled
01:59story afterwards?
02:00Uh, no.
02:01Yeah, you know, I mean...
02:02You were absolutely right there.
02:03Just kind of goes with the territory, you know what I'm saying?
02:04Yeah, that didn't come into play, though, huh?
02:07Yeah, I mean, you know, business is business.
02:09I got nothing to do with that.
02:10Yeah, you just kick ass.
02:12Hey, you traded up, my friend.
02:17Hey, what the hell happened, man?
02:18We heard stories of your injury that made me cringe.
02:21Yeah, it wasn't good, necessarily.
02:24I was on Raw against Jericho and Benoit.
02:27I was stone cold and myself against Jericho and Benoit.
02:30And when I went to hit Jericho from behind, and when I did, I just planted my left foot.
02:34Just like I would, you know, a million times.
02:37And just my left quad just completely tore off of its insertion and rolled up my thigh.
02:43His quad rolled up his leg.
02:45Yeah.
02:45Picture, uh, picture.
02:46Yeah, you ever do that with the shade in your window where you pull it and it goes...
02:50Yeah, that's pretty much...
02:51It made that sound and everything.
02:52Oh!
02:54Hey, is there a video of that Triple H?
02:56Yeah, and actually, it really doesn't look like anything.
02:59Right.
03:00Like when you see...
03:00They show it all the time in this music video that they put together and they highlight it
03:04and stuff, and you go, like, what a fairy.
03:06Yeah, right.
03:07Geez, that didn't hurt at all.
03:09And then, you know, from there, we kept wrestling.
03:11I went, like, another six minutes or something like that.
03:13I kept wrestling on it.
03:14Damn, man.
03:15Which probably wasn't a wise decision.
03:17If you ever tear your quad, it's probably best to stop all activity.
03:20Stop whatever you're doing.
03:21Yeah, at that point.
03:22And so, but I kept going, and then, you know, two days later, I was getting it reattached in Birmingham.
03:28How do they reattach it?
03:30It's kind of a long process, but they use sutures and they drill holes in your kneecap.
03:35Oh, man.
03:37And, yeah, they fish it through there, and they just keep running it through,
03:39and then it forms scar tissue over the sutures and makes, like, a new tendon.
03:43How does it look?
03:45I mean, on the outside, it looks like my leg with a big scar down it.
03:48I mean, it's not really a whole lot different.
03:50It's a little bit shaped a little bit different than the other one,
03:52but you won't be able to tell on TV.
03:53No.
03:54My kneepads on and stuff, you'll never be able to tell.
03:56But it feels good now.
03:57I mean, it was pretty bad for where I was in the hospital for seven days,
04:01and then I was in a wheelchair for a couple weeks,
04:04and then I was on crutches for, like, two months.
04:06How do you get back into shape, man?
04:08You got to get a little pudgy.
04:10Well, you know what, though?
04:12I've always been into bodybuilding and stuff like that.
04:14And it's like a hobby for me, you know?
04:16And that was one of the things I, you know, I was just,
04:18I was like the trainer that went away to train for a fight to Siberia or something like that.
04:23You know, I just went down to Birmingham, and I did nothing but rehab and work out.
04:27And so I'd just go to the gym.
04:28When I'd get done rehab, I'd start at nine in the morning and go till six at night every day
04:32rehab.
04:33And then after, I'd go to the gym and train my upper body, you know?
04:36Yeah.
04:36I had nothing else to do.
04:38Yeah, I guess not.
04:38Why Birmingham?
04:39I guess I got a good facility there.
04:41Dr. Andrews, Jim Andrews, he's like the number one orthopedic in the country.
04:46He did, like, you name it in sports world, he's done them.
04:49You know, he's a Jordan, all these guys.
04:53And his rehab crew was head by this guy, Kevin Wilk, and he's like the best in the country.
04:57He speaks all over the world and stuff.
04:59So I just stayed down there because my injury was so severe that it was one of those could possibly
05:05be career-threatening things if I didn't handle it right.
05:07Yeah, the rumor at first was there's no way he's going to come back.
05:10Yeah, yeah.
05:11So, you know, I mean, I'm not back yet, so not until Monday, so hopefully.
05:15Knock on wood, but hopefully I'm, you know.
05:17Are you going to be wrestling Monday or just...
05:19You know, I don't really know.
05:21I know I'm going to be in the garden.
05:23I know I'm going to be on TV.
05:24And that's really what I know.
05:26I'm sure I'll, you know, kick the crap out of somebody.
05:29I just don't know who or, you know, if it'll be official or if I'll just be doing it.
05:33Hey, will Stephanie allow you to come by the studio and spank girls?
05:36Hey, I would love to do that.
05:38And I'm sure she won't have a problem.
05:40You do remember Peaches, don't you?
05:42Oh, hey.
05:43How could I forget?
05:44Triple H, I got to tell you, we talked to just about everyone from the WWF, but every superstar that
05:49comes through that door, we have to tell them about the Triple H visit.
05:53And that girl still has your handprint on her front cheek of her ass.
05:57Can she sit yet?
05:59You raised blood vessels in the shape of your big Triple H hand.
06:03Yeah, you made her bleed.
06:05Hey, she wanted it, though.
06:08Is that the Tyson defense?
06:09She was asking for it.
06:12Well, if you can stop by Monday, we'll make it happen again.
06:15Hey, I would love to.
06:16Yeah, we'll see what we can hook up.
06:18I'd love to come by there one of these days, you know, for sure.
06:20It's not Monday, but one of these days coming up for sure.
06:23Yeah, hell yeah.
06:23We had fun last time.
06:24Yeah, it was a blast.
06:24All right, Triple H, we look forward to Raw, Monday.
06:28Monday night, the 7th.
06:29Don't forget, tonight is a special live SmackDown.
06:32I'm here in D.C. right now.
06:33It's freezing here.
06:35You guys are going to get some cold weather real soon.
06:37Is it snowing?
06:38It's not, but it might.
06:39Parts of Virginia is going to.
06:41Okay, cool.
06:41But SmackDown tonight's a live SmackDown.
06:43That's going to be hot.
06:44I'm not going to be on it, but I'm getting a feel for the TV thing.
06:47So Monday, I'm full-blown, ready to go.
06:50All right, man, that's good news.
06:52You guys, you know, I'll call you a couple days ahead so you can get a talent line up
06:57ready for the...
06:57Well, let us know, man.
06:59We'll have all sorts of varieties, and you can have your pick.
07:02Sounds good.
07:03All right, Triple H.
07:03Sorry, guys.
07:04Thanks.
07:04Later, man.
07:05Take care.
07:05There he goes, Triple H.
07:07Back on Raw this coming Monday.
07:10And back on Stephanie all the time.
07:13How do you say it?
07:14Shut up.
07:15Come on.
07:16He's in D.C.
07:17No one listens down there.
07:18Oh, that's true.
07:19All right, let's, uh, like he'd pass by a radio with our show on.
07:24Okay, terrific.
07:25And there's sex and drinking going on in everyone's office.
07:28Dude, Ron and Fez have the hot girls, man.
07:30They are really unbelievable.
07:31I don't know what the hell's going on.
07:32I know.
07:33They treat them nice.
07:34Yeah.
07:35It's all for the hours.
07:36We ought to try that one of these days.
07:37That's true.
07:38They don't throw dead animals on their girls.
07:39They do treat them, like, really nice and stuff.
07:41If they had the 55 Gallon Drum Challenge, they would be putting, like, feathers in there
07:45and single roses.
07:48And syrup.
07:48And they would spray nice little perfume in there.
07:51Hey, Fezzy, tickle the girl under the chin there, Fezzy.
07:54Yeah, tickle her under the chin with the feathers.
07:56That might be another thing.
07:57Let me say two words.
07:58I won't say who, what, where.
08:00Fag hags.
08:01Yeah.
08:01You know, I'm thinking they don't feel threatened, maybe, by somebody.
08:06Ronnie's not a fig.
08:07Oh, please, stop it.
08:09Ron's a fig?
08:10Absolutely.
08:11Fez is the man in that relationship.
08:13Really?
08:14I didn't know that.
08:14Teasing, of course.
08:16But, yeah, I don't, I think it's, it's, you know, they don't feel threatened, the girls.
08:20They feel they could come in, hang out.
08:24He's going to kill us.
08:25And, yeah.
08:26There he is.
08:27You're not going to kill us, are you?
08:28No, but I'm just coming in.
08:29All right, cool.
08:30Look at Triple H.
08:32See, I ain't waiting.
08:33Why don't we take a break and we'll talk to Triple H, all right?
08:35Hell yeah.
08:36We'll talk about WrestleMania and all sorts of fun things.
08:38And Stephanie.
08:39And Stephanie.
08:39Jesus Christ, man.
08:40Look at the smile I say.
08:41Yeah.
08:42You're like, I don't know if you're a husband, boyfriend, or pimp at this point.
08:46Jeez, man.
08:47And we got girls coming down that he can spank, like last time.
08:49Is that good?
08:50Yeah.
08:51All right.
08:51Triple H next.
08:53The Opie and Anthony Show.
08:55It's like listening to Corky and Cara M. Quinlan.
08:58Opie and Anthony.
08:59I'd rather hear my penis in a place than listen to those jokes.
09:03The Opie and Anthony Show.
09:07And we're back with the Opie and Anthony Show.
09:10Boy.
09:11We got to get right to it.
09:12In studio.
09:12Triple H, Anthony.
09:13Triple H.
09:15How you doing?
09:16How you been?
09:16Good?
09:17I'm good.
09:17Yeah.
09:18You?
09:18Very well, Triple H.
09:20You guys are smoking on here, actually.
09:22Having fun, yeah.
09:23Yeah?
09:24F-ing off.
09:25No.
09:26You, though.
09:28I got to get right into it.
09:30The stuff that's going on with you and your lovely wife, Stephanie.
09:35Yeah.
09:36Hysterical.
09:37It's been good.
09:38It's been a lot of fun.
09:39And the pictures that are making their way around the internet.
09:42I swear to God, there are people that if they were around, they would have gotten every shot of Kennedy's
09:46brains splattering all over the limo.
09:49You need these people around when something important happens, because if Stephanie's ass crack pops out for a second, there's
09:57a thousand pictures of it on the net.
09:59Yeah.
10:00It's an amazing thing.
10:01Not a thing goes by now that doesn't get a picture somewhere that doesn't make it on the internet.
10:06Have you seen what happened last night?
10:07Have you seen any pictures of those?
10:10It's all over the internet.
10:11Which one?
10:12From the Macdown taping?
10:13Yes.
10:14Her boob popped out.
10:14Have you seen these pictures yet?
10:16No, I've not seen them yet.
10:17Would you like to see them?
10:17Let me be the first to show you.
10:19Hold on.
10:20Hunter, come over here.
10:22Let me show you Stephanie's boobs.
10:25That's where it popped out.
10:28And it just goes down.
10:30See, that's full-fledged Stephanie boobage coming out.
10:34There you go.
10:35As you're gearing up for the pedigree there.
10:38I guess that's something we will not be seeing on Smackdown on Thursday.
10:41Are they going to turn that around, Ed?
10:42Are they going to edit that out?
10:44What do you mean, turn it around, Opie?
10:46Have some class.
10:47Punch it up on your own computer.
10:50You guys think you should have it enlarged to full screen size like that?
10:53Well, we're working on it right now.
10:55We're having it enhanced and blown up.
10:58Yeah, that's amazing clarity.
11:00Yeah.
11:01Yeah.
11:01Yeah.
11:02For a shot like that.
11:03That one, and then the other day, of course, her ass was all over the Internet because you decided you
11:09were going to pull her into the ring by the back of her pants.
11:12And for some reason, when did she stop wearing panties?
11:17She had them on.
11:18I had those in my hand, too.
11:20Oh, you did?
11:20Yeah.
11:21Because I swear I could not see anything that even resembled a panties.
11:24Yeah, no, they were in my hand, too, when I picked up.
11:28And I didn't realize she had quite as much exposure as she had.
11:31Oh, really?
11:32Lifted her up, and then I heard the crowd react to it.
11:34And I was like, ooh.
11:36You know?
11:36What the hell did she say to you when you guys go in the back?
11:40The crack when she didn't mind so much, I don't think.
11:42I think the top exposure, the boob out yesterday was a little bit much.
11:48Did she give you some hell for us?
11:50Have that happen.
11:51No, it wasn't my fault, necessarily.
11:52I just assumed she was taped in there, you know?
11:54Yeah.
11:55Went at it and got a little more exposure than we planned on.
11:59Right.
11:59Is that what she does sometimes, a little double-sided tape there to hold it?
12:03Yeah, the girls will use the top stick or double-sided tape or something like that to hold that stuff
12:07in there.
12:07But the funny thing is how much reaction that gets.
12:09Like, a couple years ago on TV, I don't remember who it was.
12:13One of us, we were in a match, and one of us pinned Rocky.
12:15And when I pulled his leg up, his nuts came out of the trunk.
12:18Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:19And nobody even noticed.
12:20Like, you know?
12:21Like, never made the air.
12:23Like, no, it didn't go on the Internet.
12:25Nobody talked about it.
12:26Like, I remember going to the bag, like, dude, you're nuts.
12:31And nobody even said anything about it, you know?
12:34The people's sack.
12:35Yeah, yeah.
12:36Knowing Triple H like we do a little bit, I bet you did that on purpose.
12:39Yeah, yeah.
12:41You all heard the story about, told on Conan O'Brien about Al Snow, right?
12:46Oh, yeah.
12:46From tough enough, I went to give him a suplex, and when I pulled him up, my hand hooked in
12:51his trunks, and I had him up in the air for a good, probably five or ten seconds, and
12:56I'm hearing people, like, the whole crowd's laughing, and I'm like, what the hell?
12:59They should be, like, thinking this is impressive, not funny, you know?
13:02I'm holding this guy up there, and the referee came around the front and went, oh, like that,
13:07you know?
13:08And I looked up, and, like, right next to my head is just the whole package was hanging
13:13down.
13:14You know?
13:15I'm like, so I just said, and suplexed him, and we just all started laughing so hard.
13:21It was hilarious.
13:24It looked like a grub worm was trying to burrow out of a fur coat.
13:28Oh, God.
13:33What kind of flack you get from, what is Vince, what's his take on this when, you know, Stephanie's
13:40ass cracks shows, her boob pops out.
13:44You know, it's his daughter.
13:45I think Vince's take is, burn the footage, you know, immediately.
13:48I don't know about that, because there was a taping where Vince was staring at Stephanie
13:52's cleavage.
13:53That clip was great.
13:54A little too long.
13:55They were in the back and discussing something about, I think it was when they were coming
13:59out and announcing, it was a wedding, yeah.
14:01Yeah.
14:01And he looked right down her shirt and said, Daddy's little girl.
14:07Come on, Daddy's little girl.
14:09Like, oh, my God, she's come so far since she was that little girl chained to the boiler
14:16on her first appearance there when the Undertaker was trying to have his way with her.
14:22She was innocent, Stephanie, and then she got with Corruptible Hunter.
14:25That's what happened.
14:27I ruined her.
14:28It makes for a great storyline, though, man.
14:30It's really funny.
14:31I'm sure she's listening right now just mortified that we're talking about breasts for 10 minutes.
14:35No, we do that when she calls us.
14:36Yeah, that's true.
14:37Like, she's pretty, she knows the show all too well.
14:40Actually, she told me today, she said, first thing they're going to do is talk about my
14:43boobs.
14:43Yeah.
14:44Well, yeah, you're right, Stephanie.
14:45Well, when you pretty much put an exclamation point on both of them, she, hey, they look
14:51great.
14:52And you could clearly see the exclamation points, too.
14:55Indeed.
14:57Yes.
14:58Get your bra off and kick it off now.
15:01Did she discuss any of the surgery with you before she had it?
15:06Just that she was going to do it.
15:07Yeah, and that was it?
15:08And what did you go like, ooh, okay.
15:10You know, yeah, I'm all for that.
15:11Yeah.
15:12You know?
15:12Yeah, you've got nothing and you want something, go for it.
15:14Yeah.
15:15Well, it's working out for us.
15:16The more, the merrier.
15:18Sure.
15:19Why not?
15:20Right.
15:20We've got to ask you about the NWO there.
15:23What about him?
15:24With the Hulkster.
15:25Well.
15:25Brother.
15:26Brother.
15:27I can tell you something, dude.
15:31We understand the NWO getting a lot of heat and stuff, and it's working for the WWF.
15:35But, and I, we just don't feel the Hulk.
15:38Well, I mean, you know, it's working right now.
15:42Yeah.
15:42It's the leg drop thing.
15:43It's the Babe Ruth.
15:44You know what I mean?
15:45He's Babe Ruth to come back and play one more season of Major League Baseball.
15:49We just hope he doesn't get hit by a pitch in the first inning and shattered.
15:54Break up into dust particles and blow away.
15:56What did you think when you first hear it?
15:59It's like, okay, here's the deal.
16:00We're bringing NWO Hulk Hogan back to the WWF.
16:03What did you think?
16:04You know, on one hand, it's great because he's a legend in the business.
16:07So, it is.
16:08It's like saying, you know, Babe Ruth was alive.
16:11Babe Ruth is going to come play on your team next year.
16:13Yeah, but it's the Babe Ruth with the throat cancer.
16:15Yeah, but, you know, he's going to play for a season, and you go, great.
16:19That's cool.
16:20And then, you know, a few minutes after he's there, you realize, oh, it's 90-year-old Babe Ruth.
16:26Not the Babe Ruth I remembered, you know.
16:28And I don't think that's necessarily happened quite yet with Hogan.
16:32But, I mean, you know, I think he's realistic about it, too.
16:34There's only so much more maybe that you can get out of a guy, you know, he's in the twilight
16:39of his career, and he's doing the Babe Ruth run.
16:41And that's great.
16:42He's a great guy, and he loves this business, and he works real hard at it.
16:46So, you know, it's hard for me to lambaste too hard.
16:50Well, some of the signs that are popping up are pretty funny about the Hulk.
16:54There was one in the crowd last night, and it said Hogan 316, and then it had a little flip
16:59-up thing that said years old.
17:01It was classic.
17:04Were there any people?
17:06He was hot, too.
17:07I saw him in the back.
17:07He was like, I'm not a day over 310.
17:12Were there any old grudges from anybody that was still with WWF and him?
17:18I know there was...
17:18Well, most of the guys from his heyday can't remember that time.
17:22Oh, wow.
17:23Wow.
17:24Did I just say that?
17:25Oh, my God.
17:26I should have been taking my ginkgo biloba.
17:29Who are you?
17:30Let me tell you something, brother.
17:31That's a good question, though, because when these WCW guys come out, I'm wondering, you know, what kind of bad
17:36blood you guys got with the, you know?
17:38You know, it's a weird thing because...
17:41There was some nasty bad, you know, bad mouthing going back and forth.
17:44Yeah, and when you're working against each other, but it's a funny thing when all of a sudden that guy's
17:48on your team now, and you can make money against him.
17:52You know, like when you're looking at it going, you know, he's a pretty big name, and if I was
17:56on the other side of the ring for him and we could sell out some major arenas, all of a
18:00sudden it's easy to put aside your differences to, you know.
18:03The Ric Flair stuff's just great.
18:05Yeah, that's good.
18:05Great.
18:06Flair's classic, you know.
18:07So, I mean, and again...
18:09He's another one who's no kid.
18:11Yeah, you know, he's not a kid, but at the same time, he's not going out there and wrestling every
18:15night.
18:16He had a match with Vince, which was great, I think much better than people expected.
18:20All the blood factor in that match was fantastic.
18:22Yeah, and I think that, you know, as long as these guys are seen in limited doses, I don't think
18:27Hogan's looking to come back and be a guy that's wrestling on the show every Monday and every Thursday or
18:33whatever and having matches with everybody on the card.
18:35He's looking to come in and make big events now and then, pay-per-views and things.
18:40I think the same as Flair's and be characters within the story, but wrestle on a limited basis.
18:45And then, you know, be the Babe Ruth, but come out every now and then in the ninth inning and
18:51crack a homer, you know?
18:52Yeah, yeah.
18:53What's Goldberg's problem?
18:56There's like a list, isn't there, I guess?
18:58Yeah, but what is his problem?
19:00I don't...
19:00There's so much he with the WCW would think he would enjoy the spotlight.
19:04I hear it's about money and that he has a really good contract and...
19:08From what I hear is I don't think that Bill was ever like a huge fan of the business.
19:13And I don't think that, you know, like for me, I was a fan growing up and that's what I
19:17wanted to do.
19:18And if, you know, if I won 100 million in lottery tomorrow, I'd still do this, you know?
19:23I'd probably be a lot harder to get along with, but I'd still do it, you know?
19:28But I don't think that he would, you know what I mean?
19:30I think for him, it's, you know, he's got some money right now still being paid off from his old
19:34contract.
19:34He's going to sit back and make that.
19:36And, you know, if he comes back to wrestling, it'll be because he wants some more money.
19:40And that's probably the only reason.
19:42I don't think he has any passion for the business and I don't think it really matters to him.
19:46Right.
19:47Yeah, the guy was there.
19:48He was making a lot of money, made a big name for himself.
19:50But didn't he want to be into football or something like that?
19:52Well, he was in football.
19:53Yeah, he was.
19:54Yeah, it didn't work out for him.
19:56And then he got out of wrestling and they, you know, they moved him along super fast.
20:01But, you know, he was a limited ability.
20:03I don't think it's telling stories about him to say that, you know, he just had two three-minute matches
20:07with guys on TV and just squashed him.
20:09And that's not really what we do.
20:11And anytime he had to have a longer match with somebody, it was questionable.
20:14So, you know, how much money he could make in the long term if he actually had to be paid
20:20by putting people in seats, I don't know if he would make any money.
20:23You know, that would need to be seen.
20:25Yeah, I don't think we'll be seeing him anytime.
20:28I don't think so.
20:29But, you know, again, he's still a big name.
20:31So if the opportunity came that he wanted to come in, I'm sure there would probably be some interest there
20:34of if he played his cards right and, you know, wasn't looking for the moon, that they would be willing
20:40to take a chance.
20:41Just hire Vin Diesel and say it's him.
20:43Yeah, right.
20:43Could do that.
20:44Kind of looks like him.
20:46Let's go to the phones and talk to Triple H here.
20:49Adam, what's going on?
20:50Hey, what's up, guys?
20:51We got Triple H, man.
20:52Oh, Triple H, you're a god.
20:55One quick question.
20:56Worship me, man.
20:57One quick question.
20:59You and Shawn Michaels are boys.
21:01How many chicks did you guys ball back in the day?
21:04Because I can only imagine.
21:07Like, you mean together or?
21:09Either or.
21:10Tag team.
21:11Like, I would imagine there had to be like a billion.
21:14You know, I had a pretty good run, you know.
21:18Back in the day.
21:19I got in the business when I was a young man and, you know, was living the life, you know,
21:24on the road and you're pretty famous from TV and all that stuff.
21:30You know, it doesn't suck.
21:32Yeah.
21:32Speaking of which, are you talking to China these days?
21:34No.
21:35No, no.
21:35She went, wow.
21:36She was not.
21:37No, Joan.
21:37Joanie.
21:38China, whatever.
21:40She was bad mouthing you pretty good there.
21:41Yeah, you know, I've got nothing bad to say about her and, you know, of course, probably because she hates
21:47me.
21:47That's why she has the other bad things to say.
21:49But, you know, it's a, I don't know, it's in my past now and, you know, I've moved on from
21:55there and hopefully she has.
21:56And I wish her the best.
21:57I hope her movie career works out and I hope she makes millions of dollars and she gets everything she
22:02wants out of it.
22:02I've got nothing bad to say about it.
22:04And, you know, I think she was just bitter and understandably so and she went and did her thing and
22:09that's cool.
22:10How's the real life relationship going there with you?
22:13No gory details.
22:14I just mean, you know, you're there, you're working together all the time.
22:17That's good.
22:18You know, I mean, the one thing we have is similar passion for the business.
22:21So that's kind of good when you enjoy doing the same things.
22:24I think it's kind of hard when you, if you have a career that you're a significant other doesn't understand
22:30or doesn't have any interest in, that's pretty rough.
22:32Especially when you do it, you know, we're on the road so much and it's all consuming.
22:36You know, I'm sure it is for you guys too and if they don't understand it, it's doomed.
22:41Yeah, I guess so.
22:42So it's pretty cool and it's working out great and she's a great girl.
22:45So yeah, we, we, we think the world of her too, man.
22:49She's such a blast.
22:50She really is cool.
22:51Even more so today than.
22:52Oh yeah.
22:53Now that we get to see her body parts, that's a, that's an extra bonus.
22:56I'm sure she just freaking loves that, man.
22:59Oh yeah.
22:59I'm sure she loves that.
23:01She's mortified.
23:03You know, cause it's strange.
23:04She, she is in person.
23:07She's kind of shy.
23:08Yeah.
23:09She, you know, she's a little reserved and stuff.
23:11And when you see her in the ring, just talking smack and, uh, acting, it's hysterical when you, you've met
23:17her and spoken to her and realize what she's really like.
23:20It's like, Oh my God, that's not her exact.
23:22Her can is hanging out.
23:23Her ass is hanging out.
23:24I'm saying, yeah, she's probably mortified.
23:26Yeah, exactly.
23:27She's the exact opposite of her.
23:28Yeah.
23:29Yeah.
23:29And her mom can't be too happy about it.
23:32Yeah.
23:32I don't think either one of them necessarily.
23:34Yeah.
23:34She's too happy about it.
23:35I'll be, but, uh, you know, it's amazing thing though, that like, and I don't know if she would ever
23:40do this or never mentioned it, but you know, it's like amazing thing that if, if somebody were to go
23:44like, you know, I'm going to do play boy and I'm going to be nude in front of the world.
23:46It's like no big deal.
23:48But if your can comes out on accident, then you're like, Oh my God, you know, it's like, you're just
23:53mortified by it.
23:54It's not on your terms.
23:55Yeah.
23:55And for some, and, and somehow it's almost like you snuck the peak and it's, it's, uh, it's a little
24:02more exciting and dirty to see it like that.
24:05You're like, Oh look, it wasn't supposed to happen, but it didn't.
24:07I saw it and I caught it.
24:08It's definitely hotter.
24:09Yeah.
24:09Hey, why don't we take a break?
24:10We got Triple H in the studio.
24:11We'll talk about, uh, WrestleMania next.
24:13Yeah.
24:14Also, uh, I think we got some girls that came by to get spanked.
24:17Are you allowed to do that still?
24:18Uh, you know, Hey, I'm in character.
24:20Right.
24:22That's exactly what we registered.
24:24You'll be in character.
24:25I'm in character now and I can do what my character would do, which is bring in the broads.
24:30Yeah.
24:31All right.
24:32And we'll, uh, we'll take more of your phone calls as well.
24:36No clue, right?
24:37That's a big guy.
24:38Why would I know I'm Jewish?
24:39Do you watch wrestling?
24:40Huh?
24:41I'm Jewish.
24:42Huh?
24:42I'm Jewish.
24:43Are you here to get spanked by Triple H?
24:45No.
24:45Oh, no.
24:46All right.
24:46You know, uh, you ever hear of WrestleMania?
24:49Yes, of course I do.
24:50All right.
24:51You just discovered video games last week, so.
24:53Look, slow down.
24:54I'm very slow.
24:54Some of us are out there going to the heartland entertaining every individual.
24:58This is what he does.
25:00I know he does.
25:00I'll ask Triple H.
25:01Do you know, uh, Lewis Black?
25:03Sure.
25:03You've seen him on The Daily Show, John Stewart?
25:05Very funny show.
25:06Yes.
25:06Very funny man.
25:07See?
25:08Nice, Lewis.
25:08Nice way to reciprocate.
25:10You couldn't fake him?
25:11You couldn't fake him?
25:12Is that all?
25:12I watched wrestling, just if I said I watched wrestling, then you'd ask me a question and
25:15I'd look like a jacket.
25:17We wouldn't do that to you.
25:17We'd do that before we ask you a question.
25:19I know the gigs now.
25:20We don't have to ask you a question for you to look like a jacket.
25:24They're going to do that to you anyway.
25:26Hey, you're all dressed up.
25:27What are you doing?
25:28Going to The Daily Show.
25:30Oh!
25:31Yeah, that's right.
25:31It's Wednesday.
25:33What are you doing tonight on The Daily Show?
25:34Tonight is, uh, they're digitized.
25:37They're digitizing, uh, they're digitizing films now.
25:40You know, they take, they put a bra on, uh, on the, uh, the Bond film.
25:44On the, on the James Bond film.
25:45And then in, uh, they need some of that technology for, uh, E.T.
25:49They took the guns out of the, uh, FBI hands and put walkie-talkies in.
25:53Put walkie-talkies in and they digitized the wrinkles off of, uh, Mick Jagger.
25:57Which didn't help because-
25:58That must have taken a while.
26:00Took a week and a half.
26:01Why'd they take the guns out of the hands on the E.T.?
26:03Because it's a nice movie, E.T.
26:05And it's the 20th anniversary, we can do what he's eating good.
26:08No, you know what, you know why?
26:09Why?
26:10Because, uh, Drew Barrymore talked to Stephen and she said-
26:14Ah, yeah, she doesn't like the gun thing.
26:16Yeah, she doesn't like the gun thing.
26:17Charlie's Angels without guns.
26:19Yeah, is she like marrying a guy with ball cancer?
26:21I really can't stomach her, she stinks.
26:25You are horrible.
26:27Uh, Lewis, can we finish our little, uh, interview?
26:29Are we, uh, disturbing you?
26:31You want to sit over there?
26:32Okay.
26:32I'll sit over here.
26:33I want to sit-
26:34I'm out of your eyesight.
26:36You're interviewing people now for your special that's going to be on Comedy Central.
26:39I was reading that in the paper today.
26:42You went down to Washington, you're interviewing senators and stuff.
26:45Why don't you ask Triple H a question?
26:47It doesn't have to be about wrestling.
26:49What would you like to ask Triple H?
26:51The biggest name in wrestling today.
26:53Do you do your own taxes?
26:56Jack, could you do mine?
26:59You're Jewish, right?
27:00Yeah.
27:02Yeah.
27:07No kidding.
27:10I don't think he worries about that there, uh, Lewis.
27:13No?
27:13You know somebody who does that, right?
27:14Yeah, yeah.
27:15I got a good firm.
27:16Good.
27:16Yeah.
27:17Lewis, we, uh, we brought, uh, girls in for Triple H to spank.
27:20This, I gotta say.
27:21We've never done that for you, have we?
27:22No, you haven't.
27:23That's why I snuck in today.
27:24Hey, there have been a couple of instances where he has had some very attractive girls
27:29all over him.
27:30Yep.
27:31Left with them, I believe, to go to dinner or something?
27:34No, it sounded good.
27:35Yeah, yeah.
27:36No, they wanted to be three in the morning.
27:38Yeah.
27:39You know, which is a really great time.
27:41And, and you said no.
27:43I didn't say no.
27:43These strippers, they were, they were strippers, weren't they?
27:46Yes.
27:46And they wanted to go with Lewis three in the morning and leave and do, what do strippers
27:50do at three in the morning?
27:51They F.
27:52F.
27:52They have sex.
27:54And you, you turned it down.
27:56You guys are just incredible.
27:57Why would you say no to that?
27:58Look, you guys are so.
28:00You don't drive a milk truck.
28:00You're a comic.
28:01Why wouldn't you meet them at three in the morning?
28:03I wouldn't meet them at three in the morning because I was going to some, what was it called?
28:07What was it?
28:08It was run by, the whole thing was scammy from the beginning.
28:11What, do you think you're going to wake up in a bathtub full of ice with your kidney missing
28:14with a note?
28:15Get to the hospital.
28:16The whole thing was a little odd.
28:18Yeah.
28:18You know, it was in a room that I, like a nightclub I've never heard of, sponsored by
28:23a group of people of a website that I can't find.
28:26And, you know, and they, and they all seem to be, you know, they're all interested and they
28:30would all would have really crushed my, my schvance.
28:33You know what I mean?
28:33You know what I mean?
28:34So, well, yeah.
28:35Isn't that the idea?
28:36Start slow.
28:36Isn't that the idea?
28:37I think so.
28:38I think Lewis would like to start a little slower.
28:40Yeah.
28:41One girl at 11 o'clock at night.
28:43One girl from tiny.
28:44Then you get work your way up.
28:45One girl from tiny town.
28:46Yeah.
28:46Then work your way up until three strippers at three in the morning.
28:49Clearly.
28:49All right.
28:49That was too much.
28:50And I'd had three shows that night.
28:52All right.
28:52It's not about you, though.
28:53We're talking to Triple H.
28:54Okay.
28:54I'm sure I'm backing off.
28:55I don't know.
28:56It just sounds like a lame excuse to me.
28:58Yeah.
28:58Ah, yeah.
28:59Just a tad.
29:00I know.
29:01You got to.
29:02You can come in here and.
29:03Don't agree with these two schmucks.
29:05Have you been in here before?
29:06Because if you start to be nice to them.
29:08Then the next time you're in, they go.
29:09Here he is.
29:11Here he comes.
29:12Lewis, the difference.
29:13Yeah.
29:13Look at you and look at him.
29:15Well, I'm trying to.
29:16Would we ever do that to him?
29:17We are never going to say anything bad about Triple H.
29:20You know, like I came in here with the hopes I was going to have some room full of naked
29:24women.
29:24I got an old Jewish comedian in here.
29:27Oh, God.
29:30How old are you, huh?
29:32I'm not old.
29:34He got arrested for our show, too, once.
29:36Yeah, really?
29:37Yeah, him and Jim Norton got arrested on the Voyeur bus, that see-through bus full of naked broads we
29:42drove down to the mayor's office stock with teens was the problem.
29:46Teen naked girls driving down Broadway.
29:49Did you get any that day?
29:50No, because they took us in.
29:51In jail for every reason.
29:53What was his name?
29:54He spent 28 hours in jail for our show.
29:5628 hours in jail.
29:57Yeah, we're lucky we were, I'm glad we didn't get anything that day.
30:00Forcible entry.
30:01All right.
30:02It was like a bad scene out of Oz.
30:05Yeah.
30:05We could have used you that day.
30:07I can tell you that.
30:08Because Norton is sitting there asking the guy down, the head of the police department down there, Norton, saying, you
30:17know, how can Lewis and I protect each other?
30:19And the cop looked at him and said, what are you, delusional?
30:23There's not even a chance.
30:25He needed you.
30:26All right.
30:26Let's go back to the phone.
30:27He'd have been taking advantage of you.
30:29Yeah.
30:30Jimmy, what's going on?
30:31Hey, guys.
30:32What's up?
30:32All right.
30:32We're talking to Triple H when Lewis isn't interrupting.
30:35Yeah.
30:36Hey, game.
30:38Yeah.
30:38Hey, what's up with your dog on Monday?
30:40What's up with my dog?
30:41What do you mean?
30:42Yeah, got ran over by that limo.
30:43Yeah, I know it.
30:44He got a broken leg.
30:45You're sorry.
30:46I pulled him out of the axle.
30:47He was just fine.
30:48She was just fine.
30:49Yeah.
30:50Norton rules.
30:50Thank you, sir.
30:51That's all you want to ask?
30:51Norton rules.
30:52Hey, guys.
30:53Yeah.
30:54Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
30:55That bastard got us.
30:57Hey, Rick, what do you want to play little games like that?
30:59Why don't we get him back?
31:00Turn the radio off.
31:01Okay, click.
31:02Why don't we bring the chick in?
31:03Or the lovely lady?
31:04Yeah.
31:05Thanks, sweetie.
31:06It wouldn't be a Triple H appearance without some girl getting spanked by Triple H.
31:11Yes.
31:11What else do we need to talk about about WrestleMania?
31:13I mean, it sounds like it's going to be a great one.
31:15It's the biggest pay-per-view of all time.
31:16Yeah, it's WrestleMania Toronto.
31:18It's this Sunday.
31:20And, you know, get WrestleMania.
31:23What's that whole Mule Juice McQuaid doing?
31:25What is he doing this time?
31:27That Mule Juice McQuaid, Moon Juice.
31:29Jericho?
31:29Moon Jizz McQueen, whatever the hell he was calling himself.
31:33Chris Jericho.
31:34I'm going to knock him back into that personality.
31:36He's going to need a record career when I'm done with him this Sunday.
31:39He came in here and we love the guy.
31:41He wouldn't get out of that character.
31:43He would not leave.
31:44It was during when he was touring with his band.
31:46What was his band called?
31:47Moose Juice or something.
31:48No, that was him.
31:49Fozzy.
31:50Oh, Fozzy.
31:50So he's touring around and he's not getting out of goddamn character.
31:54We're like, dude, come on.
31:56Chris.
31:57Chris, hello.
31:58Chris.
31:58No, I'm Mule Man Juice McQuaid.
32:01Moon Goose McQueen.
32:02Whatever it is.
32:03When you've got a lucrative career touring small 200-seat nightclubs around the country,
32:09you're serious about what you do and won't break character.
32:12I guess that's it.
32:13I don't know.
32:14It just seemed a little odd.
32:15We wanted to talk to Chris Jericho and he wasn't there.
32:19Wow.
32:19This guy.
32:20Listen to this guy.
32:21Ryan, what's up?
32:23Hello.
32:24You're on with Triple H.
32:25Go ahead.
32:25I just want to know what it was like to carry Chris Jericho through like one Iron Man match
32:29you guys had.
32:30Well, all right.
32:31You're a little confused.
32:32I never had an Iron Man match.
32:33I'm sorry.
32:33Two out of three falls.
32:35No, I didn't have that with him either.
32:37But I did have a last man standing match if that's what you're saying.
32:39I was so close.
32:41You were close.
32:42It's early, you know.
32:46But, yeah, you know, it was a hell of a match.
32:48We had a hell of a war and I look forward to doing it again with him this Sunday.
32:53I'm going to, you know, beat his ass and take the title.
32:56You know, we stopped him from wearing that stupid thing on top of his head.
33:00Remember when he was wearing that?
33:02The Pebbles thing.
33:03Pebbles thing on the top of his head.
33:06He came in one time when we said, that hair thing, every time you hit the ring, it looks
33:11like a splurt coming out of a big man junk.
33:15It looks like a splurt of spunk.
33:18We called it a spunk fountain.
33:21A jizz fountain.
33:22There was a point in time where he thought like that hairdo was cool and the big furry
33:26mutton chop side were cool and stuff.
33:28And he thought that was the gig.
33:30But I think he didn't realize that people were just laughing at him.
33:33He'd walk out with that hair and everyone just started laughing.
33:36Yeah, look at this nimrod.
33:37He's got the fountain on his hair.
33:39Hey, Mike, what's going on?
33:40What's up, ONA?
33:41What's up, game?
33:42How you guys doing?
33:43All right.
33:43What's going on?
33:44Lewis, you also rule too over there.
33:46You are the best.
33:48Game, I'm looking forward to hopefully seeing you at the CAA come a couple weeks down the
33:52line.
33:54Question.
33:54What happened with the knee, man?
33:55How's the knee after Jericho clipped you with the sledge?
33:59So far, it's so good.
34:00You know what I mean?
34:01It's, you know, 10 months ago I tore it, so it was a pretty serious injury and I came
34:05back from something they said I couldn't come back from.
34:09And, you know, Jericho tried to take advantage of it.
34:12And it's a little too eerie for me.
34:14I thought it might be.
34:15It's a little bit sore, a little bit, you know, worse than it was.
34:20But I'll be fine.
34:21I'll be at WrestleMania.
34:22No worries.
34:23There you go.
34:23That injury sounded horrific.
34:24Yeah, let's tell Lewis.
34:26Yeah.
34:27You know what happened to this guy for real?
34:29His quad muscle from the knee up or?
34:32Yeah, but right above my knee where your quad attaches is like one of the biggest muscles
34:37in your body.
34:37And it just tore right from the insertion.
34:40It tore and just rolled up my thigh.
34:41And the whole muscle rolled all the way up his thigh.
34:43And I wrestled another four minutes or so, six minutes, something like that with it up
34:47there.
34:48And then went through about 10 months of rehab to come back.
34:52And it was tough.
34:54That's worse than like when one of your yams from your yam bag slips up for a second.
34:59You go, oh, hey, hey.
35:00For a second, you think you've only got one.
35:02And then you go, no, no.
35:03It's like, hey, get down there.
35:04Get back down there.
35:05That little pat.
35:06Where the hell are you going?
35:07Right.
35:08Where are you going?
35:09You freak out for a second because if it goes any higher, you might lose it.
35:12Right.
35:12You don't want that thing venturing around and playing with other organs inside your
35:16body.
35:16Stay down.
35:18I'm very distracted because we've got three really good looking ladies in the studio.
35:21I'll say.
35:22Beautiful.
35:23You're right.
35:24Yeah.
35:24That candy, you might remember her from the 90-90 contest.
35:27Just a tad there, Triple H.
35:29Don't watch your eyes, guys.
35:30Wow.
35:31Can you give her the pedigree so we can watch her boob fall out?
35:35That seems to work.
35:36I don't know if you have to give it to her.
35:36I just got a hooker for her.
35:37Just hook her for her.
35:38Just until it comes out.
35:39I think these girls are here to get spanked by Triple H.
35:42Yeah, and Triple H is going to be in character during this whole thing.
35:46Yeah.
35:46Let me get into character, guys.
35:47Yeah.
35:47All right.
35:48Okay.
35:49There we go.
35:50That's a amazing character.
35:53I'm in character now.
35:55Why don't we have the girls-
35:56Everybody get naked.
35:57Why don't we have the girls step up to-
35:58Not you.
35:59To Lewis.
36:00Not you.
36:00Lewis' mic there.
36:02Yeah.
36:03All right.
36:03Yeah, baby.
36:05Can Day.
36:06I'm back.
36:07Now you're back.
36:08Are you a big wrestling fan?
36:09Of course.
36:10Yeah?
36:11Yeah.
36:11You want to ask Triple H a question?
36:13Um.
36:16Who's your favorite?
36:17Feeling better?
36:18I feel great right now, yeah.
36:19Who's your favorite?
36:21I'd have to say Undertaker.
36:23Uh-oh.
36:24What is that?
36:25What the hell is that?
36:25We got Triple H right here.
36:26You say Undertaker?
36:27She's looking to get spanked on.
36:29Yeah, I wouldn't say that before you're going to go over his knee.
36:32Hey, Triple H, open hand.
36:35Yeah.
36:35Get the fist going.
36:39Well, I say Candy, this robe.
36:41Let's get it home.
36:43Yeah.
36:43Somebody needs to be naked.
36:44How much do I have to take off?
36:45As much as you girls want to and being completely naked.
36:49I didn't think I was going to get naked.
36:51You don't have to get naked.
36:52What's up?
36:52You got to take the jeans down, right?
36:54I'm wearing a skirt.
36:55What's up, baby?
36:57Can you pull the skirt up?
36:58What up?
36:59See, this is always the part.
37:01Yeah, we might have to pass on it.
37:02It makes you feel bad.
37:03Well, the arguing, manipulating to get the naked part is...
37:08It's never like it never ends.
37:10It's been that way since your first hit puberty.
37:13You came in knowing you were getting naked.
37:14Just do it.
37:15We don't want to pitter-patter around with it.
37:17Are you talking to Louis Black now or the girl?
37:20I want to keep his clothes on.
37:22No, the shame makes it hot.
37:26Does it the begging and the pleading?
37:28I don't want to.
37:30I'm almost thinking about switching seats just so I don't have to look at Louis while the girls get naked.
37:34It's going to ruin the whole experience for me.
37:37No offense.
37:38None taken.
37:40I don't want to get my ass kicked.
37:41I don't want to say crap, man.
37:44Lisa, what's up?
37:45Louis will talk all bad when you're completely out of the building, Hunter.
37:49He will just...
37:50He'll start talking, what the hell was that?
37:52Yeah, he's like that.
37:53He's a stupid wrestler.
37:54You can't trust them.
37:56You can't trust them.
37:57Yeah.
37:58He's shifty.
37:59He's shifty.
38:00He's shifty.
38:01They all are, and...
38:02Oh, God damn it.
38:04You guys are ugly.
38:08You're a little shifty, Louis.
38:09I'm really shifty.
38:11It's the last time I badmouthed the wrestler.
38:13Are you all insane?
38:15Good God.
38:17You know, if it was a senator, then I would do it.
38:19Yeah, don't get...
38:20Don't worry.
38:21Let's get a griff.
38:22No, he's never badmouthed.
38:24No.
38:24And I'm certainly not going to badmouth you.
38:26Not now.
38:27No, well, certainly not anybody who, you know, you rip a quad and then you're still fighting
38:31for six minutes.
38:32Yeah, you know.
38:32I was like a bruise to him.
38:34A bruise?
38:34That means he could just take me with his pinky.
38:37Oh, let's not be too...
38:38Remember when...
38:39You actually had a hangnail, Louis, yet you completed doing Back in Black on The Daily
38:44Show.
38:44Exactly.
38:44Like a trooper, man.
38:45He was in pain and agony, but you just kept going.
38:48Yeah.
38:48And I once did it without makeup.
38:50Did you?
38:51And you once did it with your shirt off.
38:54We do remember that one.
38:56We'll be keeping it on today.
38:57Yeah, the difference between when you do stuff with your shirt off and Triple H, my girlfriend
39:01doesn't moan when your shirt's off.
39:03Oh.
39:04Can you keep your shirt on, Triple H?
39:05Yeah.
39:06The moaning at home, I'm like, all right, Sam, relax.
39:09I guarantee he takes his shirt off.
39:10There'll be a lot of groaning in this room.
39:12Oh, God.
39:14All right.
39:15Whatever he says, it's all good.
39:17Is Candy ready or what?
39:18Okay, I'll pull my skirt up.
39:20Yes.
39:20All right.
39:20Oh, yeah.
39:21Well, it's got to be on bare ass.
39:23Candy, he's a big star.
39:24He doesn't need to disrupt.
39:25He's a huge star.
39:26Are any of the other girls going to get a little more naked than that?
39:29What do you think?
39:30Are they all wearing fishnets?
39:31Girls?
39:31Like a little bit?
39:32Oh, you're going to wow those?
39:34Those are beautiful.
39:35Wow.
39:36It is Wednesday, opening.
39:37All right.
39:38All right.
39:38We've got to get through Candy first.
39:39If she shows those, will you play with them?
39:45Listen, I've got like 10 minutes left.
39:46I've got to go for the gold, bro.
39:48You know something?
39:49You're absolutely right.
39:50There's no time for any of this playing around.
39:52It's like the Olympics.
39:53I'm on the gate.
39:54Ready to go out the hill here.
39:58Yeah.
39:59All right.
40:00If you would lift your skirt then and get over Triple H's knee.
40:04Oh, wow.
40:06She's wearing fishnets.
40:07What a dumper.
40:08Wow.
40:09I like me muscle.
40:11I cannot lie.
40:12That is great.
40:14All right.
40:14Candy.
40:15What do you want me to do?
40:17Whatever Triple H wants.
40:18There's really not much nudity here is the problem.
40:21I know.
40:22Wasn't that kind of the...
40:24I don't really feel that the spanking...
40:27I should be the one doing the spanking in this situation.
40:29Mark Carano, who's the WWF publicist over here,
40:33who absolutely on the way here refused to get involved in this.
40:37Oh, really?
40:37Look at him.
40:38Live on the air has to do what I tell him to do because he works with us.
40:42So come on over here, Mark, for a second.
40:44Triple H.
40:44That girl will get topless in the background.
40:46Oh, wow.
40:47We're going to get to them in a second.
40:49All right.
40:49Come here and bend over here.
40:51Can I spank her, honey, with my face?
40:52Now, Mark's going to do the spanking.
40:54Hold on.
40:54I'll get the mic closer.
40:55Yeah.
40:56Mark.
40:57Here goes Mark.
40:58You and your business, Mark.
40:59Go ahead.
41:00Get in here.
41:00Enjoy.
41:01Get in here, boys.
41:01There you go.
41:02There goes Mark.
41:04There goes Mark.
41:05There it is.
41:06Oh.
41:07How was that?
41:08That's pretty hard.
41:09Are you doing that?
41:10A little harder?
41:11Give it to her.
41:11Give it to her.
41:13A little harder.
41:14Oh, yeah.
41:16All right.
41:16What do you need?
41:16One more?
41:17Yeah.
41:20Say, Mark, I've been a bad girl.
41:22You have to spank me.
41:23Mark, I've been a very bad girl.
41:25You have to spank me.
41:28Did Mark just moan?
41:31I think he just got one.
41:33Yeah.
41:34Yeah.
41:35All right.
41:35I'll give you one with that.
41:36All right.
41:36Here we go.
41:37Big Triple H hand.
41:39Oh, Jesus Christ.
41:41Wow.
41:42Look at her face.
41:42How are you doing?
41:43Wait.
41:44Oh, are there tears?
41:46Are your eyes tearing?
41:47Candy, what are you doing?
41:48I'm just tearing up.
41:51You just knocked her out.
41:55Nice shot, Hunter.
41:57Jesus.
41:57Wait, Candy, was that enjoyable?
41:59Who's the man?
42:01Who's the man?
42:02Was that enjoyable?
42:03That hurt?
42:04Yeah.
42:05Now all the girls know what you're in for.
42:06He just struck a blow for all of us.
42:08Isn't that great?
42:09WrestleMania on pay-per-view this Sunday.
42:11Yes.
42:12Hey, this girl that fantasizes about you all the time.
42:15Lisa, what's up?
42:17Hi, how are you guys doing?
42:19All right.
42:19We have Triple H in the studio.
42:21Yeah, I was getting real turned out listening to him spank that woman's ass.
42:25Yeah?
42:26Really?
42:27Is he there?
42:29Yeah, we're here.
42:30You're talking to him.
42:31It's just your sexy voice.
42:32He's throwing up.
42:34Triple H.
42:35Yeah.
42:36Do you like your women to have a big C?
42:44Oh, that's tremendous.
42:45Isn't that great?
42:46That was great.
42:47Louis, take over.
42:49Oh, you jackass.
42:50Oh, look at those racks.
42:51That's pretty funny.
42:52Hey, we've got cones.
42:54Yeah.
42:54Oh, look at this.
42:55Those are beautiful.
42:56What's your name?
42:57Me?
42:57Yeah.
42:58Diana, where are you from?
42:59Speaking to the microphone.
43:00Oh, I was going with the one first.
43:01I was going left to right.
43:02And where are you from?
43:03Florida.
43:04And you live in New York now?
43:06Yeah.
43:06I was born in Kansas, though.
43:07Huh?
43:08I was born in Kansas.
43:09Are you dancing in New York?
43:10You're not in Kansas anymore.
43:11I know, Toto.
43:12Mm-hmm.
43:13Cool.
43:14Banter.
43:15Where do you dance?
43:16VIPs.
43:17Ah, VIP.
43:19VIPs, man.
43:20This is what we can see at VIP?
43:22This is a little bit more.
43:23You might be able to see my ass there, too.
43:24Really?
43:25Well, we're going to have to do a better job at the library.
43:27Wow.
43:28I didn't know if girls of these caliber were at a VIP.
43:31Of course.
43:32And you want to get spanked by Triple H?
43:34A little bit.
43:34How long before guys just ask you straight out if they could T.F. you when you're on
43:40a date?
43:41Is it at dinner or dessert?
43:43I'm on the radio show right now.
43:45You really?
43:45That's how long it takes?
43:47And then they're just like, could I just, you know?
43:48No.
43:49No.
43:49I'm hard to get it.
43:49They've got to call me for a while.
43:50Does it happen, though?
43:52Yeah.
43:53A little bit.
43:53You give that?
43:54Six weeks.
43:55Yeah, six weeks?
43:56Six weeks.
43:57She's got a schedule.
43:58How long for a while?
43:58She holds out for a diamond like the one she's got around her neck.
44:02I give a little something.
44:04All right.
44:05All right.
44:05Well, I think Triple H is ready.
44:07So if it was three in the morning and there were two other girls with you, would you do
44:10it with Lewis?
44:13It depends on the girls.
44:14Uh-huh.
44:15Lewis would ask for the T.F., right?
44:17Yeah.
44:17And it depends on his wallet.
44:22Hunter's got to go soon, so maybe you could get those pants down a little bit and-
44:26No.
44:27What?
44:27Listen, my ass is sunburned and I worked out yesterday and it's sore already.
44:32All right.
44:32Well, it's getting late.
44:34We got problems today.
44:35Well, it's getting late now and there's another girl in here, so, you know, you mind making
44:40out with her or something?
44:43Would you girls maybe hook up for Hunter for a little bit?
44:46For a little.
44:47Give him just a little, like, a little girl on girl action.
44:50Does she dance at VIP, too?
44:52She does, too.
44:53Very nice.
44:54So you both have natural breasts.
44:56Yes.
44:57Are we so natural?
44:58Yeah.
44:59Wow-wee.
45:00No.
45:00Yeah, seriously.
45:02Oh, my God.
45:02I've changed my playing with you.
45:03See, Hunter?
45:04Right.
45:04You saw that.
45:06I know you saw that.
45:08Listen, there is no such thing as-
45:10If I walk over to these guys and, like, cup their nuts, it's not anything.
45:14It's completely-
45:16I know.
45:16I'm standing here like she didn't even do anything like that.
45:18Yeah.
45:18Yeah, she did.
45:19And you know what the sad part is, Opie?
45:20There's nothing we could do about it.
45:22Triple H wanted that.
45:23I'm just saying.
45:24That's not-
45:25And she just walked over to it and started playing with her boobs like nothing was happening.
45:28You know?
45:28How you doing?
45:29Great.
45:29How are you?
45:30Hunter comes over and grabs a handful.
45:32Playtime's over.
45:33Oh, God damn.
45:34I'm being raped.
45:37That could be the nicest pair of breasts I've ever seen.
45:39Really?
45:40Ever.
45:40Wow.
45:40That was Diana for your formation.
45:42Hey, so, girls, Hunter doesn't have enough time for us to really do this subtly.
45:47So, you girls, do your best, like, girl-on-girl action scene for Hunter.
45:51Okay.
45:53Is that good?
45:54Okay, was that good for you?
45:55No.
45:55That was really bogus.
45:56Yeah.
45:57That was bogus.
45:58All right, why don't we spank?
45:59You know that's a tease.
46:00We're on the Vice channel.
46:01How about we spank these girls?
46:02We're not the, like, Vivid Video.
46:04All right.
46:05Hunter, punch them in the face.
46:10You know I'm teasing.
46:11Of course.
46:12Okay, who wants to-
46:13Who wants to pull their little pants down and have Hunter smack them with his big hand?
46:19My ass a little bit too, uh-
46:21What?
46:21Their ass is raw, she said.
46:23Triple H, right now I am taking this opportunity to apologize profusely to you.
46:28Yeah.
46:29Because I was under the impression that we were going to have girls down here, that we're
46:32going to bear their bare ass.
46:34Yeah.
46:35And let you spank them.
46:36And, uh, apparently, uh, we're wrong.
46:39I'm a bit disappointed as a New York Google.
46:40I'm very disappointed.
46:41I'm from Kansas.
46:43What the hell does that have to do with anything?
46:45Are you from a nunnery?
46:47Kansas?
46:48Kansas.
46:48That just happens to have her top off in front of a room full of guys.
46:51Right.
46:52Yeah.
46:52We know what happens.
46:53The girls get on the bus.
46:54They go to New York to, uh, get an acting career or something.
46:58Make them an actress and-
46:59Right.
47:00And before you know it, Hunter's spanking you on your bare ass.
47:03Oh, that's great.
47:04Come on.
47:05What about you?
47:06Your ass is a little what?
47:07I said my ass is a little sore.
47:09From what?
47:11Why is it sore?
47:12Did you have some action?
47:14Some backdoor action last night?
47:15I wouldn't exactly call it backdoor action, but I did have some.
47:19So what's the big deal if Hunter just, like, plows your hand?
47:23Well, yeah, yeah.
47:23He said I'm working tonight, and if I'm working tonight, and he has his big red handprints
47:27on my hand.
47:27But do you know what a moneymaker that is?
47:29The clientele that goes in there are perfect-
47:32No, that's not moneymakers.
47:32... WWF watchers.
47:34Okay, you've been-
47:34You know something?
47:35I'm sorry that they'll say Triple H was here.
47:37Everyone will come to see Triple H's handprint on your ass tonight.
47:41I agree.
47:42That is an absolute given.
47:44You will get tips from guys that will come down and go, I got to tip you because I got
47:49to see Triple H's handprint on your ass.
47:51No?
47:51We're begging now.
47:52First one.
47:53Tip him right now.
47:54Hey, how about Candy?
47:56One more shot?
47:57I'll go again.
47:58Candy will go again.
47:59Why?
48:00My bad.
48:01Candy will go again.
48:03You know, I think 9-11 changed strippers in New York City.
48:07It's done something.
48:08I think it's done something.
48:09Back before then, there was something, there was a total lack of morality and scruples.
48:14Now they've reassessed their life and for some reason don't take their pants down?
48:18Right.
48:19We found the only moral strippers in the city.
48:20What happened?
48:22You're right, Honor.
48:23What is going on with this country?
48:25What happened?
48:26Triple H.
48:26For the love of God.
48:27He's never coming back now.
48:29Can we get back to strippers that will insert broccoli in places?
48:33I got one more girl outside.
48:33One more girl?
48:34All right.
48:35Who do we got?
48:35That looks like a guy to me.
48:37I know.
48:37There's a guy with a hat.
48:39All right.
48:39Oh, Jesus Christ.
48:40Not Stalker Patty.
48:42Oh, my God.
48:42Oh, God.
48:43Look, you know what?
48:44I'm embarrassed.
48:45I am completely embarrassed.
48:47We are moving this goddamn show to Cleveland.
48:51Lewis just sat up straight there.
48:52I'm sick of these frigging bitches from New York, Opie.
48:56They will not help us out.
48:57That was wrong.
48:58No more plugs.
48:59Bye.
48:59That was really wrong.
49:02Excuse me.
49:03What's the matter?
49:04What's the matter, Lewis Black?
49:05That was wrong.
49:05Take the mic.
49:06We don't need to talk to Stalker Patty.
49:08That was just wrong.
49:09What?
49:09What was wrong?
49:10What?
49:11What?
49:11That was what Rick is bringing her in?
49:13Why not?
49:14What kind of?
49:14What do you mean, why?
49:15Are you going to explain this to you?
49:18What?
49:19Have you lost your grip?
49:21You've been in this room so long.
49:22I don't understand why that's wrong.
49:24Can you imagine seeing her with her pants down and him spanking her?
49:27Her little chiclet teeth falling out.
49:30You know how nice that would be?
49:31Wait, Patty really wants me spanked?
49:33No.
49:34She's like leaning on her cane with one good leg.
49:36I know.
49:37She's all gimpy.
49:38She's like Uncle Wiggly over there.
49:40Look at her.
49:40You're a master quad.
49:42Yeah.
49:43She ripped her quad coming over on the bus.
49:45Yeah, that's what happened.
49:46Rick, what's going on?
49:48Guys, this is terrible.
49:49These girls got to get thrown out.
49:51I agree.
49:52I agree.
49:53Out the window is what they're going to get thrown out.
49:54You're absolutely right.
49:56You know something?
49:56You should not even be asking the question.
49:58They need to be thrown out and thrown out now, and they should consider themselves lucky
50:02that they're not dead.
50:03Rick, you are absolutely right.
50:05You know something, Candy?
50:06You have been a trooper or anything.
50:08These two, get out.
50:13Get out.
50:14Don't let the door hit you on the ass on the way out.
50:16Don't even take time to put your goddamn clothes back on.
50:19I want that.
50:20Rick, Rick, escort the ladies out.
50:22I am tired of stripping.
50:24We have a huge star of the WWF here today, and we have girls from VIP, and they refuse to
50:31take their pants down because your ass hurts.
50:34Last time I was on here, this place was full of chicks.
50:37See?
50:37You are so right, Triple H.
50:38He's going to remind us.
50:39You are so right, Triple H.
50:40Yeah.
50:41He's never coming back.
50:41Your ass hurts.
50:42Rick, slam the door on their hurt asses when they leave.
50:45Goodbye.
50:45Goodbye.
50:46I am so tired.
50:48I am drawing a line in the sand today.
50:51No more moral strippers on this.
50:52I mean, just for a little striking, what's the problem?
50:54A little tap.
50:55You need some kind of screening process or something?
50:58Yes.
50:58A room in the back where they have to get naked and do something first.
51:00Very good.
51:01Then they qualify to get on the show.
51:03A qualifying round.
51:04Yes.
51:04Hunter, please do not let this keep you from coming back again to this show in the future.
51:09Please remember the good time you had last time.
51:11I'll come back banking on the fact that you guys will make it up to me next time I am
51:15here.
51:15Oh, tenfold.
51:16Yes.
51:17Tenfold we'll make it up to you.
51:18I've not lost my confidence in you two.
51:20We've got something to look forward to.
51:21Yes.
51:21Just imagine what we'll have next time he comes.
51:24Forget about it.
51:25Do you want to spank Razzle Rizzo before you leave?
51:28Oh, God damn.
51:30Knock your scoliosis straight.
51:32Oh, God.
51:38Oh, wow.
51:40Awful.
51:40Big V, what's going on?
51:42What's up, guys?
51:43How we doing?
51:43Hey.
51:44Big fan of Triple H.
51:46Big fan of what you do in that ring.
51:47I got a question for you.
51:48Yeah.
51:49Now that some of the Alzheimer's are coming back like Hulk Hogan, I imagine while you were
51:54growing up, you probably watched him.
51:56How does it feel to work with those guys?
51:59That's pretty cool.
52:00You know, I mean, to watch the guys you grew up with, he's a little bit different now than
52:03when I grew up watching them.
52:04But, you know, it's pretty cool.
52:06I mean, it's like, you know, I'm sure if you played basketball and you get to come back
52:10and play with Larry Bird or something like that, it'd be, you know, a huge thrill.
52:12And, you know, it's good to have him around.
52:15And like I say, he's the Babe Ruth of wrestling.
52:17And, you know, hopefully he can play a few innings and hit a few home runs and be good for
52:23the business.
52:23When you say that, if not, I'll hit him and he'll shatter like a pile of dust and we'll
52:27go on.
52:28I was just going to ask you that.
52:29I know you're not a modest guy.
52:30How would you put yourself and your ring experience up against anybody who's been in the wrestling
52:36business?
52:36Where do you rank yourself?
52:38I'll go up against anybody from any time.
52:40You know what I mean?
52:40There's been some greats in the business, but I'd like to consider myself one of them.
52:44So, you know, everybody's got different styles, got their own gig, but, you know, I'll put
52:49my stuff up against any of theirs.
52:51And I'm looking forward to getting in the ring with Hogan and I'm looking forward to getting
52:54in the ring with Flair and all those guys.
52:56Bring it on for me.
52:57Good deal.
52:58And I'll tell you what game, one day I'll be getting in the ring with you, my man.
53:01All right, man.
53:02All right, be good.
53:03Thanks, Big V.
53:04All right, later guys.
53:05All right.
53:06I just hope I'm not 50 when he does it.
53:09He must give you crap about the Babe Ruth thing.
53:12Could you at least say DiMaggio?
53:14Does it have to go back to the old black and white fast motion films?
53:19Well, I guess we've got to get him out of here.
53:21Yeah, Hunter, he's doing Conan O'Brien tonight.
53:23Candy, one more shot from Triple H?
53:26Yeah.
53:27Candy, hey, at first she was like, that hair is now.
53:30She's like, can you?
53:31Yeah, a little more.
53:32All right, let's put a mic on Candy.
53:33Yeah.
53:34On the mouth part.
53:35Toronto is backing up now.
53:37Come in here, Mark.
53:38You've got to warm it up.
53:39Sure.
53:39Warm it up.
53:40Warm it up.
53:40Warm it up.
53:40Warm it up, Mark.
53:41Rick, put the mic on here because he'll move the microphone around the other way.
53:44See, Candy's a trooper, man.
53:46Ready.
53:46All right, here we go.
53:48Oh.
53:50Oh, I'm kidding.
53:52He just hit it.
53:54That wasn't even Hunter.
53:55You give it like a good bone, not like you just crippled your bone.
53:57Wait, that wasn't even Triple H?
53:59No.
54:00All right.
54:01Listen to this, Mac.
54:02You've got to give some type of consolation prize for me being here.
54:06Give them some type of, like, orgasmic moan before I do it.
54:08Yeah.
54:09Before you do it?
54:11Yeah.
54:11Like right now?
54:12Yeah.
54:12Oh, yeah.
54:14Oh.
54:18Oh.
54:20Oh.
54:22Oh.
54:23Oh.
54:24Oh.
54:26Oh.
54:28Oh.
54:29Oh.
54:30Oh.
54:31Oh, yeah.
54:32Oh, yeah.
54:34Oh, my God.
54:35Oh, God.
54:36Are you okay?
54:38Oh, my God.
54:40Oh, my God.
54:41Oh, my God.
54:42I like the best part was her face hitting the microphone.
54:45She lurch forward about two feet.
54:47Did you see that ass come apart?
54:49Oh, my God.
54:51Do it for me.
54:52Oh, my God.
54:53See?
54:54This show's not so bad.
54:56Oh, my God.
54:58Wow.
54:59What do you think, Candy?
55:01That was good.
55:01See?
55:02She's thanking him, so it couldn't be them, man.
55:04Bravo.
55:05All right.
55:06Triple H, thanks for hanging with us.
55:07And next time, you're going to say that you're going to need an IV drip of some sort of antibiotic
55:12when you leave next time.
55:13All right.
55:14That's how many sick girls we're going to bring in for you.
55:16All right.
55:16Let's do it.
55:17I just want to mention one more thing before I go.
55:20So, Continental Airlines Arena on the 28th of March, it's a Thursday night, NWO is going
55:26to be there.
55:27Hulk Hogan in his first appearance since, like what, the 1800s?
55:33No.
55:34No.
55:34Since 1993 is going to be there, and I'm going to be in Continental Airlines Arena, a little
55:41bit flustered now.
55:42Yeah.
55:43For the first time in over a year.
55:45And it's not a SmackDown, but it's a huge event, and it's on a Thursday night.
55:49And we're going to rock that place, so that's the place to be.
55:52Cool.
55:53And WrestleMania Sunday, watch me become WWF World Champion and kick Chris Jericho's ass.
55:59That is going to be fun to watch.
56:01Pay-per-view Sunday.
56:03Cool.
56:04What, Patty?
56:04Patty's a little embarrassed to ask him to smack her just once.
56:08What?
56:09She's going to break in half.
56:11He's not going to hold back.
56:12Patty, are you insane?
56:15You're asking that question.
56:17Yeah, I know.
56:18Oh, my God.
56:20This is a girl.
56:22He's never coming back.
56:23I know.
56:24How are you going to give him that?
56:25The last image he's going to have is of Stalker Patty's butt.
56:29It's not pretty, my friend.
56:30So, anyways, got to go.
56:31Yeah, exactly.
56:33Hunter's got to leave.
56:35Unfortunately, I've got to go.
56:38But I thought you were in character.
56:39Yeah.
56:40Wait, hold on.
56:41I'm getting out of character.
56:42Yeah, that's what it is.
56:43Got to go.
56:44Damn it, he's out of character.
56:45But see, if he spanks Stalker Patty, then when he has to talk to Stephanie about his appearance
56:49on the show, this could make it a little better.
56:52Look, do you want to abuse our guests like this?
56:54Look at the girl.
56:55First of all, she can't take a hit.
56:57She's got a bum leg.
56:58She's got a Treblinka hairdo.
57:02That's not my fault.
57:05She's not looking.
57:07That's not my fault.
57:07Well, she has hair like Ewan McGregor.
57:10That's not my fault.
57:11All right, we're not going to put Triple H through there.
57:13No, of course not.
57:16I've got to tag out the Lewis on this one.
57:18Yeah, tag out.
57:19No, no.
57:20Lewis, no.
57:22No, not even if you come at me.
57:25I'd rather take a punch.
57:28There's a few things Lewis will fight about, and this is one of them.
57:31Yeah, exactly.
57:32Patty, you're going to have to be satisfied with a picture or something, because it ain't
57:35happening.
57:36Lewis is making a shiv out of some plastic over there that he learned while he was in
57:40prison if he has to stab me if I try to force him to do this.
57:45God, you're funny, man.
57:47All right, Triple H.
57:48We're all going to watch WrestleMania on pay-per-view this Sunday.
57:50Have fun at Conan, and come see us soon, all right?
57:53Thanks, guys.
57:53We'll see you next time.
57:54Triple H.
57:55Howard, Howard, Howard, Howard.
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