- 2 days ago
Dave & Chuck the Freak play a game of 'Hot or Not' and are shocked at the reveal of a woman who is going to jail for 6 months for a crazy reason. Why did she earn the nickname 'Stitch'?
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00:00New summer life hack, Chuck. Combine America's favorite pick-me-up from 5-Hour Energy Firework Freeze
00:05and America's favorite frozen drink.
00:07That sounds great. I can't wait to try it.
00:10Where's your Slurpee, Chuck?
00:11Oh, I'll take care of that.
00:13Ugh, you can have it.
00:20Uh-oh, another bitch is trippin'.
00:25And this, pardon my drink, is a hot...
00:30Or not.
00:30Get your math skills, Roddy, Chuck.
00:32He was furious.
00:34He was...
00:35Dave, during the commercial break, was as intense and as paranoid as anyone could ever get.
00:43I'm trying to get more information on this.
00:44Very little information on it now, so that's my problem, Chuck.
00:47Don't look like I don't look!
00:49Am I in this?
00:50Yeah, why not?
00:51Okay.
00:51I don't know. Sometimes I send you them.
00:54Okay.
00:54So I didn't know?
00:56This, I don't...
00:58You know what? It's going to be real hard.
00:59That was my problem.
01:00I don't know.
01:00How am I going to do math if I don't have any details?
01:04All right.
01:04We won't use math on this one.
01:06I'll go with feeling.
01:08A Troy, Missouri woman.
01:11Okay.
01:14Who falsely accused a man of rape.
01:20Falsely accused.
01:23Eyes got big there.
01:24Eyes got big.
01:25I know it's crazy, but...
01:26Oh, my goodness.
01:27False accusation.
01:30She has been sentenced to six months in jail.
01:35This case involves...
01:38Selena Schoonover.
01:42Who eventually admitted to police that she made the whole thing up.
01:50They were suspicious of her story, and she finally confessed.
01:58That's it, huh?
02:00She has just begun serving her jail sentence as of yesterday.
02:05That's all I need.
02:06This happened in Troy, Missouri.
02:09There's not a lot of...
02:10I don't see anything on this story.
02:13Here's how the math...
02:14Troy, Missouri woman sentenced to jail.
02:16Here's how the math works on this one.
02:18Okay.
02:20Woman from Troy, Missouri.
02:22I'm thinking the top you could be from Troy, Missouri is about a seven.
02:28False rape.
02:29Minus five.
02:31Minus five.
02:32That's the only other detail we have.
02:34So, she's a two.
02:37A two.
02:38A two.
02:41Yeah, so far, on the deductions, false rape is the most I've ever had to sing...
02:49Deduct.
02:50Deduct at one time.
02:51One time.
02:52Yeah, false rape.
02:53Jason.
02:55Selena.
02:56I don't know if I've ever seen a big Selena, but something's telling me that this is a big lady.
03:02Okay.
03:05Selena from Mizzou.
03:07I don't know what's...
03:08I know there was a Troy in Mizzou.
03:10Nope.
03:10Uh, I don't know.
03:12Just to play the game, let's give her a four.
03:15Okay.
03:16I don't know.
03:17A chubbier but cute four.
03:19I don't think she's cute.
03:21Oh, no.
03:22Um, maybe she's got a fat ass and that's what gives her a four.
03:27Okay.
03:27But we won't be able to see her butt in this mugshot.
03:30You never know.
03:30You never know.
03:31So, recap in here.
03:32Chuck says, Troy, Missouri instantly puts you no higher than a seven and you get five points
03:36taken off for false rape accusations.
03:39Yep.
03:40Lands him at a two.
03:41Although Jason has never seen a big Selena, he's giving this lady the benefit of the doubt.
03:47I would say that the majority of Selenas are big.
03:52Are large.
03:52Really?
03:53I think there's only one hot Latin Selena.
03:55I think there's one.
03:55Outside of that.
03:56Oh, and there's two.
03:57There's Selena Gomez.
03:59Okay.
03:59And there's...
04:00Wasn't this singer?
04:01Yeah.
04:02Yeah.
04:02There's a couple.
04:03Yeah.
04:03So, there's a couple of hot Latin Selenas.
04:04Can I change my...
04:06Okay.
04:07I'd like to make an amendment.
04:08All right.
04:09A one.
04:11Why?
04:12No.
04:12You don't get to change.
04:13Why would you change?
04:15I just...
04:16Four is high hopes.
04:18Yeah.
04:18And I don't know anything about Troy, Missouri.
04:22No.
04:22No one does.
04:23And those rape allegations are awfully shots.
04:28Yeeks.
04:28When you hear it again.
04:29I know.
04:31Minus five.
04:32Kudos to Ryan.
04:33And I gave him this story like three minutes ago.
04:35He got it up at DaveAndChuckTheFreak.com.
04:37You can go check it out there.
04:39How did the boys do on their hot or not?
04:42Chuck with a two.
04:44Jason has to be stuck with a four.
04:46Please open the wrong one.
04:48Oh, you should have been able to switch it to one.
04:51Well, she's bigger.
04:53Yeah, you nailed that.
04:54I was right about that.
04:54You nailed that.
04:55I'll tell you this.
04:57There's no way she's a two.
05:01You guys.
05:02There's no way she's a two.
05:03Oh, my God.
05:04She's got a big stitch shirt on.
05:05Oh, my God.
05:07Oh, boy.
05:07It's so bad.
05:08Oh, man.
05:09I think she still uses a pacifier.
05:11She looks like that kind.
05:12You know, like those bigger girls who never grew up.
05:15See?
05:16Yeah.
05:17I'm sure.
05:17I don't know if she's all there.
05:19But you think you'd then, you wouldn't go to jail if you were challenged.
05:22Guys, I mean, I hate to even just say this because it sounds so bad, but for someone to come
05:30out and say, oh, yeah, that was false rape.
05:35100% false rape.
05:36They knew without a shadow of a doubt, there's no way that it happened.
05:46There's no way it happened.
05:48Oh, there's no way.
05:49There's no way it happened.
05:50You ain't banging big stitch.
05:52Uh-uh.
05:52No, you're not.
05:53No one is.
05:54And that was probably the threat.
05:57Bang me or I'll say.
05:58Oh, my.
05:58Yeah.
06:00Or I could see it being you don't even really know this person.
06:06You know what I mean?
06:07I'm just on.
06:09I'm on social media and she scrolls by your page.
06:15Do you know what?
06:16That's how bad I think this is.
06:18That you don't even have to really know her to have been wrapped up in crazy times.
06:26She's a disaster, dude.
06:27Oh, yeah.
06:29That's a disaster you're looking at right there.
06:32Yeah.
06:32Hate to say it.
06:33I hate to say it.
06:34Paywall.
06:35So that's why it was hard to get information on it there.
06:39But that is her.
06:41She's not going to do well in prison, guys.
06:45Oh, my God.
06:46The bitches will have their way with her.
06:48No, they won't.
06:49No, they won't.
06:49Not like way.
06:50Not like sexual way.
06:51Like they will kill her.
06:55Okay.
06:56What?
06:57What?
06:58What you got?
06:59I found her.
07:01But I don't understand what's happening with one of these profile things.
07:05Is that other?
07:06That's intriguing.
07:07Is the long haired girl her?
07:10Long dark hair that's in like almost like a glamour shot.
07:14You see what I'm seeing?
07:15If Dave, when you went to the images, it showed you.
07:20No.
07:21No.
07:21Oh, no, no, no.
07:22So I sent you.
07:23Oh, my God, no.
07:25That would be.
07:26That was a mind F.
07:29It must have been Hector.
07:31Because who's.
07:34That's not her.
07:35But if you go to her photos, it is her.
07:39She put.
07:39Go back to that.
07:41What?
07:41Go back to that.
07:43And then go.
07:44Go back to her profile.
07:47Okay.
07:47Back.
07:47And then scroll down.
07:50Where is.
07:51No.
07:52See you down there.
07:55That's.
07:55That's Stitch, right?
07:57That's Stitch.
07:58That is Stitch.
07:59That's Stitch.
08:00That's Stitch.
08:00So what is she?
08:01We're going to call her Stitch now.
08:02Who's that?
08:03An AI version of her?
08:05It's an AI, yes.
08:05I mean, the head is placed on the.
08:07Yeah.
08:07Yeah.
08:08Look at that.
08:08Is that how she catfishes people?
08:11I'm hooked.
08:12Is that who she sends?
08:14Because this is really her.
08:15This one.
08:16Oh, my God.
08:18That's her.
08:19Yeah.
08:19That might be her catfish page.
08:21Got to suck when your face is round enough to not fit in the mirror.
08:27You got to get a wider mirror.
08:29Oh, my God.
08:31I'm not sure she's right.
08:32No.
08:33I think she is.
08:34Look at her friends.
08:35Can you look at her friends?
08:37Who is that?
08:37I don't know.
08:38What is her face?
08:39What is that saying in her face?
08:41Something, babe.
08:42Is that up your alley, Chuck?
08:44No.
08:44I got your goth, Mommy, right here.
08:47Oh, my God.
08:47Face tag to me.
08:48Not your babe.
08:49Not your babe.
08:50It is wild when the bottom of your chin just turns into your chest is a wild look.
09:00Just a straight line, chin to chest.
09:05She's what you call revolting.
09:07No, I mean, this ain't great.
09:10I mean, I hope they never hear that.
09:12That's got to be her mom.
09:13Oh, no.
09:14Please don't ever take a photo like that.
09:17Oh, my God.
09:17Oh, you see where she got her face.
09:18Oh, my God.
09:19It's definitely family, huh?
09:21Yeah.
09:22You see, they got matching chins.
09:26Her chin's got, like, a little pillow to sit on, at least.
09:29Yeah.
09:29It's going to get bigger.
09:32I wish I could have changed.
09:33You have to check out this lady's mugshot for yourself.
09:38Today's Hot or Not is at DaveAndChuckTheFreak.com.
09:41Please go see.
09:41Stitch.
09:42Please go see Stitch.
09:43Whatever the overall Selena.
09:45I'm going to remember her name.
09:47I know.
09:47I just remembered Stitch.
09:48Well, that's perfect.
09:49Stitch, that's her name.
09:50That was her name.
09:53She single-handedly brings down the total number of Selena hotness.
09:59Yeah.
10:00At least one number herself.
10:02Was she named after the dead Latin singer, you think?
10:06One million percent.
10:07That's crazy.
10:10Chunky white chick from Missouri.
10:12I bet if you looked at her age and when that went down, pretty close.
10:19Well, Stitch goes to jail.
10:21Yeah.
10:23And it's a wild story.
10:25Now you know why.
10:26I was rushing to get.
10:27Mm-hmm.
10:28He was in a panic.
10:29I was because.
10:30He was in a panic.
10:30All the info is behind a paywall and I was trying to get the info I needed.
10:36Only one newspaper there in Troy, Missouri.
10:39Stitch is going to eat that jail out of honey buns and no doubt.
10:42Oh, my God.
10:43You're going to be running that.
10:45I feel like Stitch ain't wearing a bra either.
10:46No, them low-hanging fro-hanging boulders going on there.
10:51Yeah.
10:52Oh, I just pictured her nipples.
10:55Why?
10:56I just pictured her nipples.
10:58Because they're probably so bad.
11:00What?
11:00Huge areola.
11:03What is wrong with your brain?
11:05He's gone purple.
11:06Look, his face has gone purple.
11:08Well, think about it.
11:09Damn, see Alice Watson?
11:10No, not in a sexual way.
11:12God, sometimes the curse is a real win.
11:16Not sexually.
11:17I cannot even picture her.
11:18How can you think of Ariel as non-sexually?
11:20Because they're gross.
11:21Do you think men are big?
11:23I think they're big and hairy.
11:24Do you think men are big?
11:26Hairy?
11:27Okay.
11:28Oh, man.
11:30Stitch.
11:30You can't.
11:31I'm going to stop thinking about Stitch's nipples.
11:33Nipples.
11:34I know.
11:35Go check out Stitch at DaveAndCheckTheFreak.com.
11:37Whoa.
11:38You'll see it there.
11:40We'll let him calm down.
11:41Yeah, shocking reveal.
11:43Wow.
11:45Wow.
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