00:00You can't hold people to the standard that they never agreed to.
00:06Sure I can.
00:07See, here's the problem though.
00:08I think people confuse standards with control.
00:10I'm not trying to control you.
00:11I'm deciding what I'm willing to tolerate.
00:13You don't have to agree to my standards.
00:15You don't have to like them.
00:16You don't even have to understand them.
00:18But don't act surprised when your choices have consequences.
00:21I don't need your permission to have boundaries.
00:23One of my standards is honesty.
00:25And if you lie to me, you didn't break some contract you signed.
00:27You just showed me that we're probably not compatible.
00:30It's pretty simple.
00:31If I value loyalty and you disappear every time that life gets inconvenient, that's your choice.
00:36But it's also my choice to stop investing in someone who treats commitment like a seasonal allergy.
00:40See, standards aren't handcuffs.
00:42They're filters.
00:43They're not here to force people to change.
00:45They're there to reveal who belongs in my life and who doesn't.
00:49People have every right to live however the hell they want.
00:52And I have every right to decide that I don't want that kind of person sitting at my table.
00:56See, that's the part that people always skip.
01:00Boundaries don't exist to control other people's behavior.
01:02They exist to control their access to me.
01:06See?
01:07So now I can't make you meet my standards.
01:09But I can absolutely decide that if you don't, you don't get me.
01:16See how that works out?
01:17It's pretty simple.
01:18We'll see you next time to show up.
01:18And see how that works out.
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