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07:05Evet.
07:05Evet.
07:06Evet.
07:38Evet.
07:38That sounds absolutely hilarious.
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07:49Evet.
07:50Evet.
07:52Evet.
07:52Evet.
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07:55Evet.
07:57Evet.
07:58Evet.
07:58Evet.
07:59Evet.
07:59Evet.
08:00Evet.
08:00Evet.
08:05Evet.
08:08Evet.
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08:15Evet.
08:16Evet.
08:17Evet.
08:20Evet.
08:22Evet.
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08:33Evet.
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08:40Evet.
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08:52Evet.
08:53Evet.
08:55Evet.
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09:00Evet.
09:01Evet.
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11:11abone olun.
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11:20abone olun.
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11:24abone olun.
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11:57abone olun.
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12:01abone olun.
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12:09abone olun.
12:11abone olun.
12:12Abone olun.
12:13Abone ol.
12:14Buna salamın.
12:1814 years ago
12:20by the way they are in a film
12:21it's called Savage House
12:22no seriously
12:24and it sounds amazing
12:26but tell us more about that
12:27there are no Christmas puddings in the film of Savage House
12:30no we're onto perfume
12:31we're onto perfume
12:33and the E-Grant Petri dish at home
12:35which clearly is a feature
12:36everything stinks in Savage House
12:39so you need perfume
12:41to cover up the smell of everything
12:44the BO, the food
12:45the teeth
12:47the state of people's hygiene
12:48when did you concoct this
12:51and have you done it before
12:53when I was 12 years old
12:54I felt mad crush on an American girl
12:57called Betsy Clapp with a double P
12:59and I tried to make perfume out of
13:01Rose and
13:03like we do
13:05and they just turned into sink bombs
13:07and then 40 years later I actually made perfume
13:09and it sells at two big stores in London
13:12I did not know this
13:13so it does very well
13:15that's amazing
13:17the fact that you smell everything
13:18Claire can you just testify to the fact
13:20he does smell everything
13:22all the time
13:22he smells everything
13:23yeah
13:23for my
13:24ah the smell of for my
13:26forgive me
13:26have you two worked together before
13:27no
13:28well on this film but that's it
13:29yeah
13:29yeah okay
13:30so did you know about the smelling thing
13:32the sniffing thing
13:33no I learnt a lot
13:34about Richard
13:35yes
13:36okay
13:37which was good
13:38because you're such a fascinating human being
13:40yes he is
13:41and you're gorgeous and brilliant
13:42and we all absolutely love you
13:44yes we do
13:44so when you first
13:45when did you first
13:47yes
13:48yes
13:49get me out of here
13:49keep us waiting
13:50thank you
13:51I'll be over now
13:52thanks Callum
13:53when did you first
13:55when did you first see him sniffing
13:57um I can't recall
13:59um I think it was
14:01I think it was
14:01your neck
14:01no
14:04when I first met you I came in
14:06that's what I always do
14:06I go
14:07hi how do you do
14:08ah
14:09like a sniffing vampire
14:11yeah
14:11like a vampire
14:12if I see a vampire sniffed
14:14instead of bit
14:15this is you go to
14:16this is you go to
14:17but lots of inanimate objects
14:18I've noticed the sniffing happened
14:20okay
14:20um because you smell scripts don't you
14:23first of all
14:23yeah everything
14:24yeah I think it's the
14:25it's the shortest synaptic leap
14:26in the brain to your memory
14:28right
14:28so how you remember everything
14:29is you smell it
14:30like a dog
14:31okay
14:31is that reverse engineering
14:32of a smelling thing
14:33or
14:34because you now smell
14:36so you've reversed engineered
14:37mitigation
14:38for doing it
14:39I don't understand
14:40what you just said
14:40I don't understand that either
14:41well because you've told us
14:43you've told us why it's useful
14:44yes
14:44did you know that before
14:46and therefore you think
14:47I've sniffed everything
14:47because it does this
14:48or you've sniffed anything
14:49I'd better sort of come up
14:50with a scientific reason
14:51I'd better come up with a reason
14:52it's reverse engineering
14:52when I was nine
14:53my dad said
14:54why are you sniffing everything
14:55I said well the dog does
14:56and he said well you're not a dog
14:57and I said well my teacher says
14:59we're all animals
15:00so you know
15:00there you go
15:01I don't understand why people don't
15:03everybody doesn't sniff stuff
15:04no I agree
15:05I mean you kiss somebody
15:06you only take a good
15:07sniff at them first
15:07well they do say
15:08you can't go out with somebody
15:09that you don't know
15:10you kind of go
15:10oh I'll write a cup of tea
15:12absolutely
15:14favourite smell
15:15a gardenia
15:16a gardenia
15:17yeah
15:17alright
15:19okay
15:20so the smelling thing
15:22you go to the set
15:23can you smell a good movie
15:26you know by the script
15:28by the first five
15:29ten pages
15:30and also by the casting
15:31and the other thing is
15:32when you know
15:33when you're cast
15:34with somebody
15:35you're supposed to have
15:36chemistry or a connection
15:37with them
15:37you have no idea
15:38if that's going to happen
15:39or not
15:39so it's a real bonus
15:40if you meet somebody
15:41and you really like them
15:43and get on with them
15:43but Foy
15:44she's great
15:45you're great
15:45she was very difficult
15:48okay but
15:48I've been told
15:49and I absolutely am
15:51as well
15:52okay
15:52who knew
15:53who knew
15:54first
15:55who
15:56who was in the film
15:57did you know
15:58right okay
15:58I knew he was in it
15:59you knew he was in it
16:00yeah
16:00and I read the script
16:01knowing that he was
16:02going to play that part
16:02so he was in it
16:03you weren't in it
16:04he is in it
16:05that gets you more
16:06closer to it
16:07oh yeah
16:08okay
16:08Jack and Sarah
16:09is one of my favourite
16:10films of all time
16:11as I've told you
16:14I promise you
16:15I tried to watch this film
16:16I promise you
16:16I would not have people on
16:18if I didn't try
16:18and watch their film
16:19I'm really looking forward
16:20to seeing it
16:20honestly
16:20Savage House
16:21in Cinemas Tomorrow
16:22anything else you'd like
16:23to say about it
16:24it's really funny
16:25and great
16:25go and watch it
16:25it's really funny
16:26great
16:27go and watch it
16:28they make a very happy couple
16:29there you go
16:30for the price of one
16:31Claire Foy
16:31Richard E. Grant
16:32yeah
16:35taking a look at the break
16:36next
16:37it's Inspiral Cup
16:37it's their back
16:38with their classic
16:39Saturn 5
16:40yay
16:42the lame and the
16:44lifeless gods are
16:45the resident 35
16:49the lady crying by his side
16:52is the most beautiful
16:54woman alive
16:55Saturn 5
16:58you really were the greatest night
17:02you really were the greatest night
17:03stretching out on a summer day
17:05he used to be calling me back to you
17:09they used to be calling me back to you
17:35they used to be calling me back to you
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20:34many times I love it I would live I've actually looked there to try to buy
20:41something where I could be right at the stable right
20:45the muse houses
20:46you know ying camping
20:48so the muse houses you know
20:49living I know dy Mullum
20:51yes so the garage the people now use like cars
20:54yeah people in the parts otras they were the stable somehow
20:57and they the flats above which is meats with the grooms
20:59exactly so this is where this was like my dream London place to live
21:04Şenaya, surely you're Şenaya Twain.
21:07Well, there wasn't anything available at the time.
21:09So we're like, okay, let's just go rent the horses
21:10and at least go ride out the horses.
21:12Well, I'll go on to Right Move today
21:13and we'll try to get you on the move.
21:15That would be fun.
21:16No, the dream.
21:17Come on, you step out of your muse.
21:18Yeah, of course it is.
21:19You know, 10 steps to the stables,
21:24get on your horse and you go ride in the high park.
21:25So how often will you ride
21:27over the next couple of weeks in London?
21:29Every day off.
21:30Every day off you'll ride.
21:31Yeah, I won't ride on a show day,
21:32just, you know, not to take me.
21:34No, you don't ride on a show day.
21:35You also famously don't eat much on a show day
21:38until after the gig.
21:39Yes.
21:40That's because.
21:41Well, yeah.
21:42I, you know, you sing from your diaphragm
21:45and you're moving around a bit.
21:46So I just stay on liquids all day.
21:51No digestion issues.
21:53Because I usually burp when I sing.
21:55Yeah.
21:55You say it's like six,
21:57usually if you eat in the day,
21:58it's about song six, song seven.
21:59Yep, six songs, six, song seven.
22:01Then I start burping.
22:04It's chair.
22:05I bet your burps are the best sounding burps in the world.
22:08No, but it's like, it's just like clockwork.
22:11Yeah.
22:12So I just stick to liquids and no dairies.
22:15No dairy.
22:15Dairy's really bad for the throat, isn't it?
22:17Yeah, that's got the whole mucus thing going on.
22:18You know, because you're clearing your throat all day.
22:20You know, it's just bad, it dries you out.
22:22And we're going to have a little Shania boys and girls quiz now.
22:26Okay.
22:26All right.
22:27Okay.
22:28If you answer enough questions right,
22:30we'll play Dirty Rosie again and again and again.
22:32That's your prize.
22:33I would love to ask.
22:34I would like, I'd like to know,
22:35who do you think Dirty Rosie is?
22:37That would be a great question.
22:38Okay.
22:39Well, we can ask you that at the end.
22:40All right.
22:41So these questions are,
22:42the answer is either boys or girls.
22:44All right.
22:45Okay.
22:45So I just say boys or girls.
22:48Yeah, you do.
22:48And if the answer is boys, you'll hear this.
22:52Okay.
22:53And if the answer is girls, you'll hear this.
22:54Let's go, girls.
22:55You may have heard that before.
22:57Yeah?
22:57You ready?
22:58I'm ready.
22:58Okay, here we go.
22:59Question number one.
23:01Girls.
23:02Why?
23:03No, we've not.
23:03I haven't asked you the question yet.
23:04That's the overture.
23:05Question number one.
23:07Oh, let's go, girls.
23:09Okay.
23:09Yeah.
23:10In the song.
23:11I'm bad at games.
23:12Yeah, tell me.
23:12Go ahead.
23:13In the song Run the World by Beyonce,
23:14what's the most used word?
23:16Is it A, girls, or B, boys?
23:17B, boys.
23:18Am I wrong?
23:20Oh, it's girls.
23:22Let's go, girls.
23:23Yes, it's the right answer.
23:25We can edit that, can't we?
23:27Oh, the answer is girls,
23:29so we can keep playing your thing.
23:32Girls, it said 41 times.
23:34Okay, okay.
23:35Question number two.
23:38In Cyndi Lauper's most famous song,
23:39who famously won to have fun,
23:41girls or boys?
23:41Girls.
23:42Let's go, girls.
23:43It's the right answer.
23:46They get more difficult.
23:47I know, I'm totally stumped.
23:50In the band, the Bangles,
23:51famous for their songs
23:51Water Like an Egyptian
23:52and Eternal Flame.
23:53Are there more girl or boy members
23:55in the band?
23:56Walk like an Egyptian.
23:58What do you think?
24:00Girls.
24:01Girls.
24:01Let's go, girls.
24:02It's the right answer.
24:06All right.
24:09You're getting cocky now.
24:11Right now.
24:12In the all-time international football goals,
24:14sorry,
24:14is the all-time international football goalscorer
24:17in the world a girl or a boy?
24:19Oh, I actually really did know this.
24:22Yeah.
24:22Girl.
24:23Let's go, girls.
24:24It's the right answer.
24:27It's Christine Sinclair from Canada.
24:29Awesome.
24:29Yeah, who scored 190 goals
24:31for the Canadian national team.
24:32All right, the most Academy Award nominations
24:34is 21,
24:35but is this held by a boy or a girl?
24:38Girl.
24:39Let's go, girls.
24:40It's the right answer.
24:42Meryl Streep.
24:43I just like the way you say girl.
24:45Do you?
24:45Okay, I'm going to change it now.
24:46Meryl Streep has 21 nominations.
24:48Wow.
24:49All right,
24:49is the record for the most number one singles
24:51by an artist on the US Billboard Hot 100 chart
24:54held by a girl or a boy?
24:59A girl.
25:01Let's go, girls.
25:02It's the right answer.
25:04We've never had anybody get so many questions
25:06right in one of our quizzes.
25:07Girls are raining.
25:08Okay.
25:09It is raining down girls right now.
25:11All right,
25:11is the all-time Olympic gold medal record
25:14in women's singles tennis
25:15held by a girl or a boy?
25:19Oh.
25:20Well,
25:21it has to be a girl.
25:23Let's go, girls.
25:24It's a girl.
25:27Serena Williams with four gold medals.
25:28And Serena Williams has just announced
25:30she's playing tennis again next week
25:31in Queens at the age of 44.
25:34and the rumor is
25:35she's coming back to tennis now
25:37in 2026
25:38so she can play
25:39in the Olympics in LA
25:40with her sister
25:41back in the Olympics.
25:43Wow.
25:43How exciting is that?
25:44Oh, boy.
25:44Try to get that ticket.
25:46No, no.
25:46Oh, girl.
25:46Not a boy.
25:48Oh, girl.
25:49Oh, girl.
25:50In January,
25:51it was announced
25:52that the new highest-grossing actor
25:53brought in $15.4 billion
25:55in worldwide box office gross.
25:57Is this an actor,
25:58a girl or a boy?
26:00Girl.
26:01Let's go, girls.
26:02It's a girl.
26:04It's Zoe Sardana.
26:05Talking of Zoe's,
26:06who holds the record
26:07for the highest-grossing concert tour
26:09of all time?
26:09Is it a girl or a boy?
26:11A girl.
26:12Let's go, girls.
26:13Yeah.
26:14Guess who it is.
26:15Madonna?
26:16No.
26:18Celine Dion?
26:18No, it begins with T
26:19and ends in Ayla Swift.
26:21What am I thinking?
26:23Yeah?
26:23How could I not think of Taylor?
26:26Of course.
26:27Taylor Swift is the answer.
26:29Like, what?
26:30And one more.
26:33This is a good one.
26:34You might not get this one.
26:35Oh, boy.
26:35I mean, you're stumping me
26:37like crazy.
26:38All right.
26:38Was the song played
26:40on the 2007 Space Shuttle
26:43Endeavour voyage
26:44sung by a boy or a girl?
26:46Girl.
26:47Let's go, girls.
26:49It's the right answer.
26:53OK.
26:54And as promised,
26:55Shania wins another mention
26:56of her album.
26:59Shania Twain's brand-new album
27:01Little Miss Twain
27:02is out on July the 24th
27:04and her current single
27:04Dirty Rosie is out now.
27:07Yay!
27:09Still to come,
27:10Kiefer Sutherland
27:11is going to be on the show.
27:13Esther Perel
27:13and Kyle Faulkner
27:14playing live,
27:15but now ticket is in the break.
27:16It is the Inspiral Cup.
27:17It's now back with
27:18This Is How It Feels.
27:23is the one who wants to be on the show.
27:24Husband don't know what he's done
27:27Kids don't know what's wrong with mom
27:31She can't say
27:33They can't see
27:34But it's down to another bad day
27:39So this is how it feels to be lonely
28:11İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
28:15İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
28:43İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
28:52İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
28:55İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
28:57İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
29:00İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
29:01İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
29:32İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
29:43İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
29:44İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
29:55İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:05İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:10İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:12İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:13İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:13İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:17İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:18abone olabiliyor.
30:20İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:50abone olabiliyor.
30:54İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
30:56abone olabiliyor.
31:00İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
31:02abone olabiliyor.
31:03İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
31:31İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
31:58abone olabiliyor.
32:01abone olabiliyor.
32:03Abone olabiliyor.
32:04Yani ben şimdi yabancınız.
32:04abone olabiliyor.
32:06abone olabiliyor.
32:07abone olabiliyor.
32:08Abone olabiliyor.
32:09bababa görüyorum.
32:11abone olabiliyor.
32:13abone olabiliyor.
32:13Andat appropri bir şey.
32:14Şimdi bu sorun 전 soru.
32:15Because i want to ask the question.
32:16Similarly to that.
32:17If you can't watch yourself back.
32:19ve completely get that.
32:21Yeah.
32:21Can you listen to your music back?
32:23Yes.адно
32:24soruyor. Very
32:25much yes. So
32:26anya. It's
32:27a physical thing. The way
32:30one interpretss.
32:31The way they look.
32:32I have very few mirrors in my house.
32:36Very few reflective surfaces.
32:38Yeah, pretty much.
32:40No marble then.
32:41So it's just, yeah,
32:42I think I wish I'd looked a little different
32:45and so I just avoid looking
32:47and I just feel the way I do,
32:48which is, I like that.
32:50But we all think you looked and look great.
32:53Well, that's very generous.
32:54Along with more than half of the rest of the world,
32:55I would imagine.
32:57I want the other half.
32:58Yeah, I know.
32:59I want it all.
33:01It is true, I know it's true
33:03So whilst you were making Stand By Me
33:06You taught River Phoenix to play the guitar?
33:08I did not, no
33:09Oh, I thought you did
33:10I taught him how to play a song
33:11A song, sorry
33:12So he was already playing
33:16And I was not a great guitar player by any stretch
33:20I had started playing when I was 11
33:22But I had clearly gone in a different direction
33:25And so I wasn't really focused on the guitar
33:28That much at that time either
33:29And I had learned Stand By Me
33:32And it was a very simple song
33:34To play the rhythm pattern and sing
33:37And I think he really wanted to play and sing
33:40And so he was starting that
33:42And so this is a good song for that
33:44And I had taught him that
33:46And then at that kind of time
33:48I remember Rob Reiner commenting like
33:51Oh man, I haven't heard that song for a long time
33:54And the film was called The Body
33:57At that time off of the Stephen King short story
34:00And then later became Stand By Me
34:02And I think it was
34:04I was glad that I had at least played a part
34:07In help reminding him about that song
34:10Back to Simpler Time, right?
34:12So Simpler Time, another track on Kiefer's brand new album
34:14It's called Great
34:14It's a lovely, lovely, wonderful album
34:17Simpler Time, Kiefer Sutherland
34:19Growing up, it was a simpler time
34:20Running down Main Street with friends of mine
34:22Back when a phone call only cost a dime
34:24I've been thinking about a simpler time
34:25Small towns and welcome signs
34:27A stranger's smile or the wink of an eye
34:29We could all be a little more kind
34:30That's why I'm thinking about a simpler time
34:32Yeah, I've been thinking about a simpler time
34:33Is it just that it's our turn to think about a simpler time?
34:37Well, yeah, I think the joke
34:38Like whenever I've introduced it on tour
34:40I've always made the joke
34:41At great risk of sounding like
34:42One of those two Muppets on the balcony
34:44Yeah, it's just like
34:46It was so much better when we were younger
34:48Yeah, yeah
34:49And now you're going to say
34:50The next thing that we're saying
34:51But it's different now
34:52But, yeah
34:54I was
34:55It wasn't
34:56Look, there's nothing that's going to change
34:58What's happening now
34:59And progress is being made
35:00And technology is changing
35:01And, you know
35:04My grandparents went to school
35:05In a buggy and a course, right?
35:07And then, but by the time
35:09Long before they passed away
35:11People were walking on the moon, right?
35:13So, I mean
35:13It's staggering how much changes
35:15In the course of one lifetime
35:17And so this was more of a reflection
35:19Kind of through my kids' eyes
35:21And through my grandkids
35:23I was just so grateful
35:25That I didn't grow up with a cell phone
35:26Yeah
35:27I so valued my childhood
35:29And the freedom that we had
35:30To explore
35:32To make up games
35:33I mean, we would play war
35:36With the kids across the street
35:37And we had little encampments
35:38And we made all this stuff up
35:40And I think that
35:42I was so grateful for those memories
35:44That's really where simpler time
35:46No, and I get it again
35:47Again, it chimes with me
35:48You don't have to
35:48You know, it's deafening
35:49How light it chimes with me
35:50However, having said that
35:52The VHS, which was new to our parents
35:55Thank goodness for that
35:56Because that meant
35:56You got to see all your dad's movies
35:58Yes
35:58So we embraced it in our time
36:00Didn't we?
36:01Yeah, so it was really funny
36:02Oh gosh
36:03When you're the young person
36:04And all of this new stuff
36:05Is becoming available
36:07It's awesome, yeah
36:08And you just can't figure out
36:09Why your parents can't get it
36:11Yeah, yeah
36:12But I was 18
36:14I had been growing up
36:15In the theater with my mom
36:16And we would
36:17Me and my sister
36:18My twin sister
36:19Would finish school
36:20We would go to the theater
36:21Do our homework
36:22My mom would do her performance
36:23Then we'd all go home
36:24That was all very normal
36:26If back then
36:28When a film came out
36:29You know
36:29If it was successful
36:30It stayed in the theaters
36:31For two, three months
36:33And then if you missed it
36:34You missed it
36:35And I was not of age
36:37So I couldn't see
36:38Any of my dad's films
36:39And then when VHS came out
36:42I was about 18
36:42And then I saw
36:44Oh my God
36:45I mean
36:46What I saw
36:47From everything
36:48From, you know
36:50Bertolucci's 1900
36:52Casanova
36:53Fellini's Casanova
36:55Don't Look Now
36:56Kelly's Heroes
36:57MASH
36:58All starring your dad
37:00Yeah
37:01And just
37:01So mad
37:02And I
37:03I was
37:04I felt like a bad son
37:05That I hadn't seen
37:07All of this great work
37:08That he'd done
37:08I certainly didn't realize
37:10How versatile he was
37:11I didn't realize
37:12How prolific he was
37:14And so I called him
37:15After that
37:16And I just said
37:16I'm really sorry
37:17I just watched
37:18Judge Diana
37:18And I had so many questions
37:20And he laughed
37:20And he said
37:21Well don't be sorry
37:22I mean how on earth
37:23Could you have seen
37:24Yeah he didn't mind at all
37:25Yeah no of course not
37:26And that kind of
37:28Was the beginning
37:29Of our adult relationship
37:30Right
37:30And so yeah
37:31So to the people
37:32That invented VHS
37:34Thank you very much
37:35Yeah well done
37:35Yeah well done
37:36Similar times is great
37:37But you know
37:37We're happy with
37:38The times when they
37:39Weren't that simple
37:40We were quite happy
37:41With the VHS recorder
37:42Yeah
37:42And the player
37:43And it's true
37:44That you and your dad
37:44Obviously you sort of
37:45Rekindled or restarted
37:47A new iteration
37:49Of your relationship
37:50Yeah
37:50And then you started
37:51Acting
37:52And then he said
37:53Don't mess this up
37:54Yeah
37:54You know
37:55Because I'm quite good
37:56Please be quite as good
37:57As you possibly can be
37:58It was
37:58No no no no
37:59It was
38:00It was really
38:01Kind of fortunate
38:05He decided
38:06He had
38:06I have three younger brothers
38:08Him
38:09From him
38:10And a different
38:11From his wife
38:12Francine
38:13Of 50 years
38:14And
38:15And
38:16They decided
38:17That they were
38:18Going to take some time
38:19And so they all moved
38:21To France
38:22And
38:23He kind of
38:24Was a stay at home dad
38:25For
38:26At least five or six years
38:28And that was kind of
38:29The window that I had
38:30At the beginning
38:31Of my career
38:33So I never had
38:34This weird moment
38:35Where
38:35We both had a film
38:36Coming out on the Friday
38:37Right
38:39I had a window
38:40To kind of
38:40You know
38:41Stand by me
38:43Lost Boys
38:43Flatliners
38:44Young Guns
38:45Young Guns
38:45All of those films
38:46That I made
38:47Came
38:47Kind of
38:48Came out
38:48Cleanly
38:49Right
38:49That's interesting
38:50In that window
38:50Yeah
38:51And so
38:52So
38:53Yeah
38:54And I don't know
38:55If it was done on purpose
38:55If it was
38:56Oh my gosh
38:56Thank you very much
38:57Well it's the stars again
38:58But it was just
38:59Kind of
38:59Worked out great
39:00And
39:01Yeah
39:02Let's hear it
39:03Keep it something
39:03There you go
39:06Amazing
39:07Right
39:07Starts to come
39:08Esther Perel
39:09And Carl Faulkner
39:10But first
39:10Taking us into the break
39:11It's the Inspiral Carpets
39:13With their first new single
39:14In 12 years
39:15My record of the week
39:16On version radio
39:17This is Drag the band
39:20Drag the band
39:21Drag the band
39:23Drag the band
39:48Drag the bag, drag, drag the bag, drag the bag, drag the bag, drag the bag, drag the bag, drag
39:54the bag.
39:56How good is that? Drag the bag Steve, drag the bag people, drag all the bags.
40:04Our next guest is a leading global sexpert, Oprah Winfrey's best friend and a New York Times, that might not
40:11be true that bit,
40:11and a New York Times bestselling author, here with a new preface to her groundbreaking 2006 book, Mating in Captivity.
40:19She certainly can ring our bell. It's Esther Perel.
40:35This book is 20 years old, Mating in Captivity.
40:38So tell us about when the book first came out, before we get into it, and about how people used
40:44to read it in secret and all that kind of thing.
40:46Well, they used to put it in a leather bind, you know, because there was no audio book.
40:50Now I know that the majority of people actually listen to me read it, but it's also because they don't
40:55really want to be perceived as needing help.
40:59So it was experienced like that. I think it's gotten a little bit better, but certainly men were more reluctant
41:05to show that they were reading it.
41:07But my kids knew the red cover. And so in the subway in New York, they would look and say,
41:11Maman, I saw somebody read your book.
41:13It's inside another book, often inside another book.
41:15And people were too scared to come buy it, weren't they?
41:18So they would look for an old copy of it, or if a friend had one, they'd sort of sneak
41:22it out of their house.
41:22I mean, in a way, sort of, it was that below the line PR that you couldn't imagine, almost.
41:29It was putting in the public square a set of questions and experiences that many of us have, but never
41:37would talk about.
41:38OK, why don't we get back to those foundational, original questions that this book is built on?
41:43Why does good sex so often fade, even in couples who continue to love each other as much as ever?
41:49Right? People would come to me. I'm a psychotherapist. I still am.
41:52They would say, we love each other very much. We have no sex.
41:55It wasn't, we hate each other. We fight all the time. We can't communicate.
41:58Of course, we don't want to touch each other.
41:59There was no beef at all.
42:01No, no. And now we have contraception. We can do what we want, and we don't want it, and we
42:06don't know why. Make me want.
42:07Why does good intimacy not necessarily guarantee good sex?
42:11As in, what is the relationship between love and desire? Where do they relate, and where do they conflict?
42:16Can we want what we already have? The big question of desire.
42:20Why is the forbidden so erotic?
42:22Why does sex basically experience a fatal blow after kids?
42:27And when you love, how does it feel? And when you desire, how is it different?
42:32Those were the guiding questions of this book.
42:33And they are still in there. They're still there.
42:35They're like page four or page five, and you start to answer those questions.
42:39I would say the question today is, how can desire survive lives of increasing frictionless technologies and disembodied ways of
42:47living?
42:47Okay.
42:48That's the new circumstances in which we are.
42:52It's the contactless life, the frictionless life, the remote life, the screen life.
42:59It's really the question, are we going to do a ritual or virtual?
43:03Yeah, so how do we sort of care and conjure up contact in this contactless world, especially when the dating
43:14sites are digital and virtual and removed?
43:18And we're in danger of witnessing the death of dating almost.
43:22No, dating will continue to exist. It will take new forms.
43:26I mean, but there is something about looking for a soulmate on an app, you know, and the fact that
43:32we even consider our partner a soulmate.
43:34I mean, soulmate has always meant God, the one and only, was not a human being.
43:38So this idea that you can find one person, the one and only with whom you're going to have everything,
43:44and that one person can give you what an entire village used to provide,
43:48that in itself is a grand ambition of romantic love that needs to be shrunken to size.
43:53And so some people who have been dating for a while and, you know, had very unfortunate experiences
43:58or very repetitive experiences or really boring experiences, they've retreated back to that village of friendship.
44:04Yes, but here's the piece that I think is problematic with modern dating.
44:08It is a little bit, it's romantic consumerism.
44:12I shop, I have a checklist, and the first thing that needs to happen for dating to regain some of
44:19its soul and its life is to ditch the checklist.
44:22Money dating are like interviews, job interviews.
44:26They're not an adventure.
44:27A date is an adventure, not a data collection.
44:30So that's the first thing that really...
44:32Ditch the list.
44:33Ditch the list.
44:33Ditch the list, everyone.
44:35Right, Macy in Captivity.
44:37It's not a new book.
44:38It's been out for 20 years.
44:39And it's sold millions and millions of copies.
44:42And Esther's TED Talks have tens of millions of views.
44:45Watch one.
44:47Those who know, know.
44:48Those who don't, well, you've now found out about Esther Perel.
44:51Can we hear it for Esther Perel, please?
44:54Thank you.
44:56Amazing.
44:57How great is that woman?
44:59Right, that's all we have time for now.
45:00For one more TFI Unplugged, TFI 16 is next week.
45:04Thanks for watching TFI 15.
45:06Playing is that now.
45:07Kyle Fultner.
45:08How good is this song, Same Jeans?
45:10Here we go.
45:11Have a guest again.
45:12Come on.
45:12Thank you.
45:14I've got the same dreams on for four days now.
45:18I'm going to go to a disco in the middle of the town.
45:22Everybody's dressing up.
45:23I'm dressing down.
45:29Life's from a circle and it doesn't.
45:32When it ends, they still be my friend.
45:36Am I making a fool of myself?
45:38Tell me I'm not making a fool of myself.
45:42So when you look in the mirror.
45:46Reflecting back at you, someone that you don't know.
45:50That's the stranger that's been around.
45:52Get your sense of daddy and get your feet back on.
45:56But I, I, I, I, I've had the same dreams on for four days now.
46:00I'm going to go to a disco in the middle of the town.
46:04Everybody's dressing up.
46:06I'm dressing down.
46:11My mind's not coming.
46:13But it's in seeing if you're nice.
46:15The way you can achieve in the air.
46:17It's not so hard for your love.
46:20It's on the switch.
46:21You know, it's not so hard for your love.
46:23It's on the shift.
46:24So when you look in the mirror.
46:28Reflecting back at you, someone that you don't know.
46:32That's just me, let's turn around.
46:34And get your syndicate and get your feet back on.
46:38But I, I, I, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
46:40I, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
46:55ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
46:55ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
46:55ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
46:55ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
46:55ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
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