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00:13My stars and gods, President Ronald Reagan, my hero.
00:21Is this heaven?
00:22Oh, not just heaven, Ruckus.
00:25White heaven.
00:26You see, there are many different types of people, Ruckus.
00:28So God created many separate, but, well, for the most part, equal heavens.
00:34You don't say.
00:40White heaven is for decent, good, God-fearing Christians who just happen to, well, hate everyone and everything relating to
00:49black people.
00:50That means no Muhammad Ali, no hip-hop music, and no fucking Jesse Jackson.
00:56What about Whoopi Goldberg?
00:59Nope.
01:00Ah, this is heaven.
01:05Turns out that God really doesn't have that much of a problem with racism.
01:09He doesn't even remember slavery.
01:11Except in February.
01:13Personally, I hate black people, Ruckus.
01:16That's why I did everything I could to make their lives miserable.
01:20Crack?
01:20Me.
01:21AIDS?
01:22Me.
01:23Reganomics?
01:23Come on, I'm in the name.
01:26And God has rewarded me.
01:28Know why?
01:29Ah, cause two niggas and two quarters don't add up to a dollar?
01:33Well, that.
01:34And because God loves white people.
01:37And if you teach everyone on earth to love the white man, you too can join us in white heaven.
01:51Oh, praise my God.
01:57I am the stone that the builder refused.
01:59I am the visual, the inspiration that made ladies sing the blues.
02:02I'm the spark that makes your idea bright.
02:04The same spark that lights the dark so that you can know you're left from your right.
02:07I am the ballad in your box, the bullet, in the gun, the inner glow that lets you know to
02:12call your brother's son.
02:13The story that just begun, the promise of what's to come.
02:15And I'ma remain a soldier till the war is won.
02:19Chop, chop, chop.
02:20You flip.
02:21Chop, chop, chop.
02:23Go flip.
02:24Chop, chop, chop.
02:25You flip.
02:26Chop, chop, chop.
02:36Okay, so this meeting of the executive board of the committee to free Shabazz K. Milton Berle
02:41has now officially commenced.
02:43Let's see now.
02:45Attendance.
02:46All in attendance, say here.
02:48Here.
02:49Here.
02:50Jasmine, Mrs. Wellington isn't a member on this board.
02:55Now, first item on the agenda.
02:58Our planned bus trip tomorrow to visit our illegally imprisoned brother and offer him moral support.
03:04Have we assembled the reading material and baked goods for Brother Shabazz?
03:07Check.
03:08I have the latest edition of Highlights and two and a half fig newtons.
03:13Two and a half?
03:14Mrs. Wellington got hungry.
03:16What about the snacks for the two-hour bus ride?
03:19I got part of a lunchable and a half a bottle of Snapple.
03:22Oh, so you just want to drink the white man's poison, huh?
03:26I don't.
03:27High fructose corn syrup.
03:30Read about it.
03:32It'll kill you.
03:35Great.
03:35So we'll just get a head count for the trip.
03:38Everybody who's going, raise their hands.
03:43Oh, come on, Jasmine.
03:45The man is on death row.
03:47He needs moral support.
03:49I'm not allowed to go past the second light post.
03:51I hope you don't treat me like this when I'm on death row.
03:54I'll go next time.
03:55I promise.
03:56Well, he'll be dead next time.
03:58But I'll tell him you said hi.
04:06This is uncomfortable.
04:13God bless you, Robert.
04:15How are you this fine morning?
04:17Huh?
04:19You're not the Jehovah's Witness now, are you?
04:21Because I'm in the Jehovah's Witness Protection Program.
04:25Robert, I'm dying.
04:28That's right.
04:29Went to the doctor this morning.
04:31I only got six months to live.
04:34Tumor on the back.
04:35They call it Biggest Backus Tumoritis.
04:38Or some other big word that my tiny Negro brain and big lips can't pronounce.
04:43Doctors say they can't operate.
04:46But praise be the white God and his son, White Jesus.
04:51Well, I'm sorry to hear that, Ruckus.
04:54You're not contagious, are you?
04:55Just contagious with the Holy Spirit of our Caucasian Savior.
05:00I'm on a mission from God.
05:02And let me share his word with you.
05:05Come, child of God.
05:07Come.
05:10Do you know what's going on?
05:12Please, everybody.
05:14Everybody gather around to hear the good news.
05:17God is white.
05:18And he loves the white man above all others.
05:22All right!
05:24Woo-hoo!
05:24Yeah!
05:25Yeah!
05:27Sorry.
05:28Don't be sorry, white man.
05:30Only niggas and Mexicans are sorry.
05:32Be joyful.
05:34God loves you.
05:35That's why he made his only begotten son in your image.
05:40God hates darkies.
05:43Well, actually, I'm more of a caramel complexion.
05:47But I'm outraged all the same.
05:50Hear ye, hear ye.
05:52White God is a good God.
05:54Even darkest can rejoice.
05:57For even one's curse with the skin of coal
05:59can enter the gates of paradise
06:02if he hates his own blackness.
06:04In white Jesus' name, amen!
06:08What?
06:08That's right, Robert Freeman.
06:11You must hate thyself to save thyself.
06:15But, uh, we're okay?
06:18Excuse me?
06:19White people, we're okay, right?
06:21Of course.
06:22Cool.
06:25So who among this flock will join me
06:29so that the world can hear
06:31this joyful message of love and redemption?
06:34Ruckus, you done lost it this time.
06:37You really dying?
06:38Praise God, yes I am.
06:41Heed the word darkest.
06:43I think you're onto something.
06:44Tell me more.
06:46Well, first of all,
06:47the Gippie is standing at the pearly gates.
06:49Yeah, he wears an old white suit.
06:51Got some white tennis shoes on.
06:54At this point, we're resorting
06:56to what I call desperation tactics.
06:58Such as?
07:03I've sent anonymous letters to the governor
07:06threatening to expose his gay lover.
07:08I wasn't aware the governor was gay.
07:10He probably isn't.
07:12But I figured 10% of the population is gay
07:14and probably about half of people cheat on their spouses.
07:17So I figured that plan has about a 5% chance of success.
07:21Better than nothing.
07:22Huey.
07:23What?
07:24You always say I should have faith.
07:26Well, that's me having faith.
07:29Random anonymous blackmail.
07:31Huey, they turned down the final appeal.
07:33The execution date has been set.
07:35It's in two months.
07:36Two months?
07:38That's so soon.
07:39I've had a long time to come to peace with this.
07:43It's not over yet.
07:46Why don't you just holler at him?
07:48I don't know.
07:49He's so detached.
07:51We used to spend all our yard time together.
07:53We used to lift weights together every day.
07:56He doesn't even spot me anymore.
07:58I think there's somebody else.
08:01JL nigga, you gay.
08:03Well, you see, the blackness in our skin represents sin.
08:08Which is why God wants us to hate the black inner.
08:11That's interesting.
08:12Yes, yes.
08:14Yes.
08:14Hate the sin, not the sinner.
08:17You got to find out God.
08:19You can't go to the corner of hate.
08:21Do you believe in God, Huey?
08:24I believe in God.
08:26First of all, I'm going to live forever.
08:29But if I do die, I'm going to smack God upside the head
08:32and go tell him to give me a grilled cheese sandwich and some tacos.
08:36When I want something, or I'm afraid about something, I pray.
08:41Have you ever prayed?
08:42And I dare God to say something.
08:44I'll be like, say something, God.
08:47Say something.
08:48Yeah, I thought so.
08:50You should pray for Shabazz.
08:51God will get him out of jail.
08:53They have to listen to him.
08:55He's God.
08:56And if God say something, I'll be like this.
08:59Ooh, take that, God.
09:00I'll be being God's jawline.
09:02But yeah.
09:03Blah.
09:06Excuse me, Reverend.
09:08Hey, hey, I know you.
09:10You armstrong elder.
09:11I've seen you on the TV news.
09:13You're the only darkest I ever seen make any sense on the TV news.
09:17Hallelujah.
09:19And you talk quite too.
09:20That's very impressive for a monkey.
09:23No offense.
09:24None taken.
09:25If you don't mind, I'd like to talk to you about expanding your message.
09:30I bet you got a white wife.
09:32Yes, I do have a white wife.
09:34Can I see a picture, Abba?
09:39It's called Operation Black Steel.
09:42We should call it...
09:43We're calling it Operation Black Steel.
09:45I like that name.
09:46We're not changing it.
09:49What's your suggestion?
09:52Jasmine and Huey's plan to get his friend out of jail.
09:55Why is your name first?
09:57Because I thought of the name.
09:59I'm calling it Operation Black Steel.
10:01Suit yourself.
10:03You'll be sorry.
10:04What?
10:05Nothing.
10:06Whatever.
10:08Operation Black Steel works as follows.
10:11Shabazz K. Milton Burrow will be executed exactly 63 days from now.
10:16That night, there'll be a candlelight vigil.
10:19Granddad, who refuses to take an interest in the fate of Brother Shabazz,
10:23will probably stay in the car and watch Friday.
10:26Ha ha ha.
10:27Hee hee hee.
10:28All the pig feet.
10:29That's funny.
10:30Ha ha ha ha.
10:31One hour before Brother Shabazz's execution,
10:35he will be taken from his cell
10:37and brought to the prison hospital
10:39where he will receive his final examination.
10:42At precisely that time,
10:45I'll fake a massive heart attack.
10:49Somebody do something!
10:50Where's his parents?
10:52He's dying, man!
10:54He's dead so funny.
10:55It's your ass, Mr. Postman.
10:57The guards will have no choice
10:59but to bring me into the prison hospital
11:01while Shabazz is there.
11:03They'll have no idea I'm a black radical freedom fighter
11:06until it's too late.
11:07I'll be able to tranquilize two of the guards right away.
11:11After that, I've got to stun the tongue.
11:16We got a problem here!
11:25We'll be gone before they even know what is.
11:28What happens then?
11:30Then I'll move to Cuba for the rest of my life.
11:32That's assuming I'm not killed in the breakout.
11:35Yeah.
11:36This is a good plan.
11:45Shabazz K. Milton Berle was actually interning
11:48for the Black Panthers in early 1970s.
11:51He hadn't even earned his black beret and leather jacket.
11:54One fateful day, he heard a gunshot.
11:57And the words...
11:58I, Eli Gorbinski,
12:01hate deputy sheriffs.
12:03In fact, I'd go so far as to say
12:05I hate all police officers and parking enforcers.
12:09And that's why I,
12:11Eli Gorbinski,
12:13shot this here deputy sheriff!
12:16Shabazz never investigated the gunshot
12:18or the oddly expositional phrase Eli yelled out.
12:21But within minutes,
12:23the cops had busted down the door
12:24to the Black Panther office supply shed
12:27and arrested Shabazz for the murder
12:28of Deputy Sheriff Gary Fyfe.
12:32Several people witnessed the murder.
12:34One had 8mm video footage.
12:37Another happened to be a stenographer
12:39who had it all transcribed,
12:41including Eli's confession,
12:43which he oddly enough signed and dated.
12:47The murder weapon had Eli's prints all over it,
12:51which were clearly visible
12:52since he had been enjoying a chocolate donut
12:54at the time of the shooting.
12:55There was also a receipt of sale
12:57attached to the gun
12:58and the manufacturer warranty card
13:01was filled out,
13:02signed and dated by Eli.
13:04During the trial,
13:05footage of the incident confirmed
13:07the stenographer's note
13:08that Gary's last words
13:09were actually,
13:11Eli Gorbinski killed me.
13:13After only 20 minutes of deliberation,
13:17Shabazz K. Milton Berle
13:19was sentenced to death.
13:22Man, ain't this a bitch?
13:26Hey, man!
13:28White Jesus tells us
13:29in order to enter paradise,
13:32we must hate ourselves
13:34to save ourselves.
13:36Sound pretty simple, don't it?
13:38I can't believe this crazy fool
13:40is actually trying to start a church.
13:43Ruckus had partnered up
13:45with famous black conservative
13:46Armstrong Elders
13:47to market his
13:48ministry.
13:50Elders was a media vet.
13:52He knew just how to package
13:54Ruckus for the masses.
13:56So, you believe God is white?
13:58First of all, white man,
14:00let me say that I love you,
14:02honor you,
14:03envy you,
14:04enjoy your smell,
14:05and I celebrate you
14:07in the name of white Jesus.
14:10Um, thank you?
14:12No, thank you.
14:13Look at that.
14:15That's a handsome young man,
14:17ain't it?
14:17Now, if God looked like Isaac Hayes,
14:19you'd think his son
14:20would look like this.
14:21So, black people are a...
14:24Cursed! Cursed! Cursed!
14:27Just look around you.
14:29That's why we in the ghettos.
14:31That's why we in jail.
14:32That's why we on UPN.
14:35Because God don't like us.
14:37You think if God wanted
14:38to change that,
14:39he couldn't?
14:40Hell, he turned water to wine.
14:42He could have changed
14:43UPN to CBS.
14:46Reverend Ruckus
14:47and his peculiar message
14:49of race-based redemption
14:50has begun to spread.
14:52And fast.
14:53How fast?
14:54Reverend Ruckus
14:55will be holding a revival
14:56here at Woodcrest Post Pavilion
14:59tonight.
15:00Tickets are expected
15:01to sell out.
15:02Coming up next,
15:03time has run out
15:04for a condemned man
15:05who many say is innocent
15:06after this.
15:08I don't get it.
15:09Who would actually
15:10follow Uncle Ruckus?
15:11We have to put a stop to this.
15:13We're going.
15:16Yeah.
15:17I'm calling you
15:18to say goodbye, Huey.
15:20And thanks for everything
15:21you did.
15:22It means a lot.
15:24It's not over.
15:25I promise.
15:26I can't say much
15:28because I know people
15:29are listening,
15:30but
15:31I promise you.
15:34Goodbye, Huey.
15:46Damn, Morpheus.
15:48What you about to do?
15:50I love you, man.
15:52Ugh.
15:54Nigga, you gay.
15:55But Grandare,
15:56you promised to take me
15:57to the prison tonight.
15:58Not tonight.
15:59Somebody has to talk
16:00some sense into ruckus.
16:01But I'm trying
16:02to save my friend.
16:04Me too.
16:05But I promised him.
16:06I gave him my word
16:07I'd be there.
16:08He's gonna die
16:09and there's nothing
16:10you can do about it.
16:14You should pray
16:15for your friend, Huey.
16:17That's all anyone
16:18can do for you.
16:18All Luke the King
16:19and all the colored folks
16:20die before him.
16:21What makes your God
16:22any less made up
16:23than his?
16:23Big old dark chocolate soup.
16:26So hate the black within you.
16:28Hmm.
16:30The row H sees 44 and 45.
16:32Let's roll.
16:36Operation Black Steel,
16:38the mission to liberate
16:39Shabazz K. Miltonborough,
16:41was aborted.
16:43Because I couldn't get a ride.
16:46People say to me,
16:48Ruckus?
16:48I say, huh?
16:49Who said that?
16:50They say,
16:50how do I make it
16:51to white heaven?
16:53Well,
16:53start by asking yourself,
16:55how was my relationship
16:56with the white man?
16:58Do you celebrate
16:59the white man's
17:01goodness of a day?
17:02Do you stop
17:03and thank the white man
17:04for the food you eat
17:06and the clothes you wear?
17:08Huh?
17:09Well, if you don't,
17:10you're going to hell.
17:12Now,
17:13I want everybody
17:14who isn't white
17:14to turn to a white person
17:16and say,
17:17thank you.
17:19Thank you so much.
17:20Well,
17:22there are those of you
17:23who say I'm a racist.
17:25There are those of you
17:26who say I'm wrong
17:27for hating niggas.
17:29Well,
17:30I call y'all
17:31all hypocrites.
17:32Cause each and every one
17:34of you can name
17:35ten niggas you hate
17:36right now
17:37if you had to.
17:39I never thought
17:39about it like that.
17:41There's Tyrone,
17:43Leon,
17:44Eddie.
17:45You don't have
17:46to admit it,
17:47that's okay.
17:48Cause I know
17:49you done already
17:50counted off
17:50five nizzards
17:51in your head.
17:52You're like,
17:53I hate that nizzard
17:54your mouth.
17:55Oh,
17:56I hate Odish.
17:57I can't stand
17:58Usher.
17:59Oh my God,
18:01he's right.
18:02I hate Usher too.
18:03What?
18:04He's right.
18:05I think I hate
18:07black people.
18:07Tom,
18:08stop being stupid.
18:09No,
18:09I think I hate
18:10them all.
18:10I don't like
18:11Puppy.
18:12I don't like Kobe.
18:14I don't like
18:15any of them.
18:16Tom,
18:17snap out of it.
18:17Come on,
18:18we'll leave it.
18:18That's right.
18:19Somebody out there
18:20is feeling the spirit.
18:23I am.
18:23I am.
18:24I feel it.
18:26If you black of skin
18:27and full of sin,
18:29come forward
18:30so I may lay
18:31my hands on you.
18:33Thank you,
18:34Jesus.
18:35Black,
18:35be gone.
18:38Praise white Jesus.
18:45Now I want
18:47everybody to find
18:48the nearest black man
18:49and lay hands on you.
18:51But boys,
18:52make sure your hand
18:54is balled up
18:55in a fist
18:55so you can beat
18:57the black
18:57out of his soul.
18:59God smiles
19:00when you hate
19:01blackness
19:02so you beat
19:03that dark
19:03in the name
19:04of the almighty.
19:06Hallelujah.
19:11People have
19:11lumped this damn
19:12man.
19:13What's wrong
19:14with y'all?
19:15Hey!
19:16That's right.
19:17Son of a raisin
19:18said beat a nigga's ass
19:20and go to heaven.
19:21God is good.
19:23You shouldn't let
19:24yourself
19:25go deeper
19:27in distress.
19:30I've never prayed
19:32before.
19:33I don't even know
19:34who I'm praying to.
19:37Maybe I'm too young
19:38to know what the world
19:39is supposed to be.
19:41It's not supposed
19:43to be this.
19:44It can't be this.
19:46So,
19:47please.
19:52Governor!
19:54What is it?
19:55They found out
19:55about Raul!
19:58Now,
19:59let us pray.
20:00Lord,
20:01I have spent
20:02my whole life
20:03hate you
20:04for making me black.
20:05And now I see
20:06I must hate myself
20:08and all those
20:09like me
20:09and cause them
20:11misery
20:11just like
20:12your servant
20:13Ronald Reagan did.
20:14And if any
20:15of my ways
20:16don't come
20:17directly from
20:18the almighty
20:19God himself
20:20then may I
20:22be struck
20:22by lightning
20:23right this
20:24very instant.
20:26Tell the
20:26God!
20:45What just happened?
20:49Would somebody
20:50like to get that?
20:54I think it's
20:55for me.
20:56The lightning bolt
20:57that saved
20:58Shabazz's life
20:59seemed to have
20:59struck Uncle Ruckus
21:00on his tumor.
21:02Doctors will find
21:03no remaining
21:04signs of his cancer.
21:05Some called it
21:06a miracle.
21:10And maybe
21:11there are forces
21:12in this universe
21:13we don't understand.
21:16Get your black
21:17banana pill
21:18and hand
21:19off of me.
21:20But I still
21:21believe we make
21:22our own miracles.
21:26I don't know
21:27how they found
21:27out about us
21:28but we have
21:29to end it
21:30Raul.
21:33Shabazz K.
21:34Miltonborough
21:35was not yet
21:35free
21:36but for now
21:37the mission
21:38had been
21:38accomplished.
21:39I decided
21:40to take the rest
21:40of the day
21:41off.
21:42I wonder
21:42if there's
21:43anything good
21:43on TV.
21:44TV?
21:45Oh.
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