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Rivals Season 1 Episode 8 | English Sub

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Transcript
00:00:08Hello, good evening, and welcome to How to Stay Married with me, James Vereker, and over here,
00:00:15the woman lucky enough to call herself my better half, my wife, Lizzie.
00:00:21Thank you, darling. Hello.
00:00:23Now, a wise man once said, marriage isn't a battlefield, it's a partnership,
00:00:28and married people should be comrades, not rivals.
00:00:32Though that's sometimes easier said than done.
00:00:36How do you stay connected after 20 years of children, careers, everything?
00:00:42How do you keep each other interested over dinner or in the bedroom when the honeymoon period comes to an
00:00:48end?
00:00:49We'll be chatting to a range of celebrity and ordinary couples to ask, how do they make it work for
00:00:55them?
00:00:55And we'll find out if the grass really is greener on the other side of the fence.
00:01:14We'll be quizzing the experts on how to keep a marriage fresh without seeking excitement elsewhere.
00:01:20We'll discuss how to deal with the pain if one of you breaks the rules.
00:01:25And how to keep your feet on the ground when you're thinking about walking away.
00:01:52Gosh, that's a lot to get through, isn't it?
00:01:54Well, we did say, till death do us part.
00:01:57So, stay tuned.
00:01:59And stay married.
00:02:00Mm-hmm.
00:02:04Mm-hmm.
00:02:05Mm-hmm.
00:02:07Mm-hmm.
00:02:09Mm-hmm.
00:02:10Mm-hmm.
00:02:10Mm-hmm.
00:02:10Mm-hmm.
00:02:12Mm-hmm.
00:02:16Mm-hmm.
00:02:19Mm-hmm.
00:02:25Mm-hmm.
00:02:32Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:02:47Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:02:54Good afternoon.
00:02:56This is Rupert Campbell Black, NPC,
00:02:58for Champin and Bisley, reminding you to vote conservative.
00:03:01Keep the Cotswolds blue.
00:03:04Hi!
00:03:06I know that's the cheese.
00:03:09Cotswolds blue.
00:03:12Don't let the lab attack our cheese.
00:03:23First I can rely on your mouth.
00:03:25All that you can see.
00:03:26All that you can see.
00:03:27All that you can see.
00:03:28All that you can see.
00:03:30Thank you so much.
00:03:31It's lovely to see you again this morning.
00:03:33Thank you so much.
00:03:36I'll take you down, I'll take you down.
00:03:40But no one's ever gone before.
00:03:43If you want more, if you want more.
00:03:47Oh, oh, I said jump.
00:03:51Oh, my girl.
00:03:53Jump in there.
00:03:53Oh, yeah.
00:03:54Oh, thanks.
00:03:55I have no idea about this.
00:03:57What are you talking about?
00:03:58I've got lots of signatures.
00:04:00What do you think about doing this professionally?
00:04:01Very funny.
00:04:04What?
00:04:04Oh, yeah, let me, there's an act to it.
00:04:07Do you mind?
00:04:07All right.
00:04:07All right.
00:04:09All right.
00:04:09All right.
00:04:34All right.
00:04:37Busy being the mistress of a wanker.
00:04:40Can I kiss you?
00:04:42Jesus, Patrick.
00:04:43I, you have no idea.
00:04:48You look fucking incredible, by the way.
00:05:08Yeah, I think that Vickie was quite taken with you.
00:05:10He'd be invited to tea at the rectory.
00:05:13Well, I'll do anything for the cause.
00:05:17Yeah, me too.
00:05:19Yeah, you're quite the campaigner.
00:05:25Oh, Seb's here.
00:05:27Yeah, he's taken me to the cinema.
00:05:31You're going out with him.
00:05:35I like him.
00:05:37It's decent.
00:05:39Well, is that the best you can hope for, decent?
00:05:44Well, maybe I'm fed up with sitting around waiting for my life to happen.
00:05:48Making sandwiches for everybody else.
00:05:54Hey.
00:05:55Hey.
00:05:55You okay?
00:05:56Yeah.
00:05:56You ready?
00:05:57Yeah.
00:05:58Taggy!
00:06:01Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow.
00:06:12Sarah.
00:06:22Okay, next item.
00:06:24As you know, we're finally putting something punchy in Declan's old slot.
00:06:27Sarah's show.
00:06:28Still working on the format.
00:06:30Newest idea is we bring in a co-host to mix things up a bit.
00:06:33Finally, thank you.
00:06:34A co-host?
00:06:35More like a magazine, but spicier.
00:06:37Network loves the idea.
00:06:39It's not your fault, Sarah.
00:06:40Primetime slot is a big thing for you to carry by yourself.
00:06:43Who is it?
00:06:43We're working on the details.
00:06:44Obviously, it won't be James.
00:06:45What?
00:06:46Your cots will round up.
00:06:47Can't dilute the brand, can we?
00:06:49Okay, next.
00:06:50Great Gardens.
00:06:51We need a new location now that we're pulling green lawns.
00:06:54Do we need to pull it?
00:06:55Freddie Jones is actively campaigning to bring down Carinium.
00:06:58Why would we put his house on our gardening show?
00:07:01Well, it might be a show of strength if we go ahead anyway.
00:07:03And means that we gain access to the property.
00:07:05See if we can't pump Mrs. Jones for info.
00:07:08Yes.
00:07:09Good.
00:07:09Let's go ahead.
00:07:11Now then.
00:07:15Am I a man of my word, Cameron?
00:07:21You are a man of many words.
00:07:23Am I a man of my word?
00:07:28Yes, of course.
00:07:30I think we'd all agree, Tony.
00:07:33Would you?
00:07:35That's curious, because I quite clearly remember telling you not to speak to anyone.
00:07:40Any of those venturer traitors.
00:07:42Do you remember what I said, Ginger, would be the consequence?
00:07:48Instant dismissal, Tony.
00:07:52In which case, Mr. Burrows,
00:07:58I might take it you no longer require Carinium Services as an employer?
00:08:07You were observed attending a screening of Absolute Beginners at the Cultures de Regal with Taggy O'Hara.
00:08:18He was spying on me.
00:08:19It's franchise season, Sebastian.
00:08:21I'm spying on everyone at Self-Preservation.
00:08:23And it turns out entirely necessary, given that you're a double-crossing little shitbag.
00:08:28So now, I'm going to make an extremely fucking public example of you.
00:08:32I'm not only going to make sure you never work in commercial television again,
00:08:36I'm going to make sure there's no job for you on any channel, anywhere.
00:08:40I'm going to make sure you can't get a job selling televisions at Rumbelow's.
00:08:49Escort Mr. Burrows to his car, would you, Ginger?
00:08:51Don't let him clear his desk.
00:08:52But I have...
00:08:53I'm very fucking glad you're leaving here with all ten fingernails.
00:08:57All right, then. Off you all, fuck.
00:08:59And thank you for your loyalty. It has been noted.
00:09:02Quick chat, Cameron.
00:09:05Come on.
00:09:06Come on.
00:09:06Come on.
00:09:07Come on.
00:09:15I brought this little guy, as requested.
00:09:21You can have it back. Soon as Lady Gosling's had a good look.
00:09:24Where were you Friday night?
00:09:25Home.
00:09:26I rang. You didn't answer.
00:09:27I unplugged my phone.
00:09:29Wanted to make sure I got a good night's rest, prepping for great gardens.
00:09:32You're not wearing your ring.
00:09:35Close to my heart.
00:09:38I didn't want people asking questions, or...
00:09:40Patrick O'Hara was at your house.
00:09:43And I told him where to get off.
00:09:46I know.
00:09:49You know you don't have to spy on me, Tony.
00:09:55Ready to go for a spin?
00:10:02You've done a spectacular job.
00:10:04The cameras are going to love it.
00:10:05We only feature the very best gardens on the programme.
00:10:08Oh, wow.
00:10:09Monica's at the falconer, of course.
00:10:10Mm-hmm.
00:10:11The duchess at the badminton.
00:10:12And then, Mon, she doesn't mind.
00:10:14With all of the unpleasantness.
00:10:16I haven't spoken to her in weeks.
00:10:19Monica feels, and I agree, you're so special.
00:10:23And showcasing this lovely garden, that's far more important than petty personal feuds.
00:10:28Oh, I just wish we could all go back to how it was before, when we're all friends.
00:10:34Do you, um, do you have to host meetings here?
00:10:37Oh, yes.
00:10:39They hole up in Fred Fred's office, and I just leave them to it.
00:10:42You know, the hardest thing is remembering who's siding with who.
00:10:45I'm so glad you said that.
00:10:46I can't remember from one day to the next.
00:10:48I'm sure we've got a couple of moles.
00:10:49Yes.
00:10:50Yes, Freddie is worried about moles.
00:10:53Really?
00:10:54Mm.
00:10:55He's been putting castor oil everywhere.
00:10:57I'm terrified I'm going to wake up in the morning and find mole hills all over the lawn.
00:11:02Oh!
00:11:06Uh...
00:11:09Think about it.
00:11:10Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:11:19Oh, you have to come down more often.
00:11:24Drive safe.
00:11:32What was my old heart doing here?
00:11:33He came to see me, darling.
00:11:34I do have friends.
00:11:36So what?
00:11:37He came for a cup of tea?
00:11:38Oh, Jesus Christ.
00:11:39We had a drink.
00:11:43Is there something you want to ask me?
00:11:46Hmm?
00:11:46Do you know where your daddy is?
00:11:48I mean, because I don't see you hounding him.
00:11:50But daddy would never.
00:11:51Oh.
00:11:52I am sick of your disapproval.
00:11:54You have no idea what I've done for this family over the years.
00:11:57Well, I don't know why you bother if you resent it so much.
00:11:59Well, you don't even like me.
00:12:00I love you.
00:12:01You're my daughter.
00:12:02When you look at me, all you see are the things you've done wrong.
00:12:05That's bloody unfair.
00:12:06I nearly died giving birth to you.
00:12:0820 years ago.
00:12:14Malhar offered me a part.
00:12:16A part?
00:12:17Yes.
00:12:18A part.
00:12:18In a play.
00:12:19Like I used to do parts and plays.
00:12:20But I don't anymore because I'm stuck down here.
00:12:23It's a play in London.
00:12:24Well, what did you say?
00:12:27No.
00:12:29Of course I did.
00:12:33Sorry.
00:12:35I guess, yeah.
00:12:36I guess it's nice to be asked.
00:12:40No, it's not, Taggy.
00:12:42You get so used to putting other people's needs first that it becomes second nature.
00:12:47And then one day you look at yourself and you think,
00:12:51why in fuck's name did I do that?
00:12:54But by then, it's too late to change.
00:13:22I'm so glad to see you.
00:13:24Just supporting my husband.
00:13:26Not that he needs it.
00:13:30What brings you to Valerie's opening?
00:13:32Sticker bombing.
00:13:34I managed to get one on Valerie's bottom.
00:13:38Closest to our opening I ever want to get.
00:13:40They probably shouldn't be talking,
00:13:42since we're with rival consortiums.
00:13:46Consortia?
00:13:46I don't know.
00:13:47Consortia?
00:13:48Consortium.
00:13:49Yeah.
00:13:50Anyway, it doesn't matter.
00:13:52We're all adults.
00:13:53I'm not giving you up for the sake of any stupid franchise.
00:13:56You're the closest thing I have to a conscience.
00:13:58Mwah.
00:14:00How many gentle flowers grow in an English country garden?
00:14:07I'll tell you now of some I know, and those I miss, I hope you'll pardon.
00:14:14Dappled dills, hot season flocks, middle sweet and lily stocks.
00:14:18Gentle laminant or holly hocks.
00:14:21Roses, fox, blocks and drops.
00:14:23Forget me not, in an English country garden.
00:14:30That's right.
00:14:32This is horrendous, isn't it?
00:14:35Absolute hell.
00:14:37Lemonade, Mrs Veracombe.
00:14:38Thank you, Sharon.
00:14:40Lovely hat.
00:14:42All right.
00:14:54James is having an affair with Sarah Stratton.
00:14:58I'm not dying.
00:15:01Shouldn't have told you that.
00:15:02You'll leak it to the scorpion to discredit Carinion.
00:15:07Why don't you leave him?
00:15:08He's a wanker.
00:15:13I...
00:15:17I booked a hotel room to have an affair with Freddie.
00:15:21Then I bottled out.
00:15:25Hated myself.
00:15:26Everyone does it.
00:15:30Really, everyone.
00:15:32All these people.
00:15:34What?
00:15:35Her.
00:15:35Over there.
00:15:36In the hat.
00:15:38Oh, is she fucking that man next to her, is it?
00:15:40Why is she not looking at him?
00:15:42Him and her.
00:15:43Hmm.
00:15:44Hand jobs in the potting shed.
00:15:46I mean, am I really the only person holding out?
00:15:54Does that make me a bit simple?
00:15:59Should I be able to hold more than one man in my head at once?
00:16:07Oh.
00:16:10I can't even make it a show about fidelity, for God's sake.
00:16:15Yes, you're an embarrassment of cronium television.
00:16:19Blimey.
00:16:19Oh, God.
00:16:20Bit of a circus, isn't it?
00:16:23Ah.
00:16:24Send in the clowns.
00:16:26Speaking of which, they're about to film your spouses.
00:16:30You can, um...
00:16:33Go and watch.
00:16:41You didn't come.
00:16:45I tried.
00:16:46I...
00:16:46I couldn't get out of the car.
00:16:49I'm sorry.
00:16:51Yeah.
00:16:53No, it's probably for the best.
00:16:58You were probably right when you said no the first time.
00:17:09It's a second away, James.
00:17:10Quiet, please!
00:17:12And action, James.
00:17:14One only has to look at your borders, Mrs. Jones,
00:17:16to appreciate what an extraordinary gardener you are.
00:17:19Tell me, what's your secret?
00:17:20How do you grow such whopping glads?
00:17:22Well, James, I feed them with grow more,
00:17:25and obviously I stake them very tall,
00:17:28so they're not flopping over everywhere.
00:17:30Can we have some quiet, please?
00:17:32Yes, thank you, Cameron.
00:17:33Quiet!
00:17:35Right, Deirdre, are we ready?
00:17:37Excellent.
00:17:39Oh, for God's sake.
00:17:40Cut!
00:17:41I'm so sorry.
00:17:41You all right?
00:17:42It's like working in a zoo.
00:17:43Why is there a dog on the lead?
00:17:44Can we find out why there's a dog off the lead?
00:17:46Okay, shall we try this again?
00:17:48Are we ready?
00:17:49Are we ready?
00:17:49I'm ready.
00:17:50Action.
00:17:51One only has to take a look at your borders,
00:17:53Mrs. Jones, to realise...
00:18:01I'm here to pick you up.
00:18:04I have my car.
00:18:05Well, Ginger will drive it, haven't you?
00:18:07Okay, I don't understand.
00:18:10They're taking you out.
00:18:11I'm here to pick you up.
00:18:53It's the Ventura franchise application.
00:18:58Okay, but how did you get it?
00:19:00Ginger did a little light espionage at Greenlawns.
00:19:05Oh, can I read it?
00:19:06What's in it?
00:19:07Enough else to get our teeth into.
00:19:09We'll pick over it tomorrow.
00:19:17Tonight is about you and me.
00:19:25Listen.
00:19:27I know I don't say it enough, but...
00:19:29Tony.
00:19:30People can see us.
00:19:40Dance with me.
00:19:41Nobody's dancing.
00:19:43I don't care.
00:19:44Come dance.
00:19:45Come dance.
00:19:48We are young.
00:19:52Heartache to heartache we stand.
00:19:58No promises, no demands.
00:20:03Love is a battlefield.
00:20:07I remember what I said about the ring.
00:20:11Once we win this, we'll do this whenever we want.
00:20:14Cool.
00:20:20We are strong.
00:20:24No one can tell us we are wrong.
00:20:30Searching our hearts for so long.
00:20:35Both of us knowing.
00:20:41Love is a battlefield.
00:20:57Come on, Tag.
00:20:58A, B, C or D?
00:20:59None of them.
00:21:00No, you have to pick one.
00:21:02Come on.
00:21:02Otherwise, how do we know which former Momentum-O character you're going to marry?
00:21:07Tag, have you seen this?
00:21:08What?
00:21:10Shall we?
00:21:13Rupert in Clinch with Cook.
00:21:16Oh, my God.
00:21:16You're in the Scorpion.
00:21:18You're the Cook.
00:21:19It's Cameron Cook.
00:21:20They must mean Cameron.
00:21:21Cameron?
00:21:21No, it's definitely you.
00:21:24Seb's going to be devastated.
00:21:25Losing his job.
00:21:26Now this.
00:21:27What about Cameron?
00:21:28It's Rupert and Cameron.
00:21:29Didn't you know?
00:21:31Well, she really picks him, doesn't she?
00:21:33Oh, God, please.
00:21:34It will ruin everything for Daddy if it comes out.
00:21:36I shouldn't have told you.
00:21:37Please, Patrick.
00:21:38Leave it alone.
00:21:44Tomorrow at the public meeting, we all need to be able to answer whatever questions come up.
00:21:49Seb's been doing some briefing notes for everyone.
00:21:52Now that he has more time in his hands.
00:21:54But we need to know this back to front like Cameron does.
00:21:57Where is Cameron?
00:21:59With the Dark Lord, I suppose.
00:22:00I rang him this morning.
00:22:01We should announce him.
00:22:02Gerald, you've got a spare copy.
00:22:03I couldn't find mine this morning.
00:22:05Uh, yes.
00:22:06Rupert does that a lot.
00:22:07Why does this have to be at Carinium?
00:22:08Should the public meeting be on neutral grounds?
00:22:11Oh, it's deliberately stacked in favour of the incumbent.
00:22:14It's simpler for everyone if they get to keep the franchise.
00:22:16So the IBA make it easy to defend and difficult to challenge.
00:22:21Look, we have to prove we've got the money and experience to take over the building.
00:22:24Because plenty of franchise applications fall at this hurdle.
00:22:27So, you know.
00:22:27You've got your best side.
00:22:30It's not anything.
00:22:32Oh, what the f***?
00:22:38You think this is funny?
00:22:41Oh, come on.
00:22:42It's just tabloid nonsense.
00:22:43It's still on to chip paper.
00:22:44You promised me you wouldn't touch her.
00:22:46I didn't touch her.
00:22:47What the f*** is that?
00:22:49The seatbelt wasn't working.
00:22:50You made him promise not to touch me.
00:22:53I'm 20 years old.
00:22:54Oh, so something did happen then, didn't it?
00:22:58She's seeing Sebas, isn't she?
00:23:02Sebas.
00:23:03Nothing.
00:23:04No, it's okay.
00:23:06She's her own person.
00:23:07Yeah, you see, she's her own person.
00:23:11Get out of my house.
00:23:12Daddy, for God's sake, stop.
00:23:14Jack, here we go.
00:23:15Seriously, this is too funny.
00:23:15You couldn't be serious if your life depended on it.
00:23:18What the f*** do you have riding on this?
00:23:19I put my house up.
00:23:21I bought the Bluebell wood so you could clear your debts.
00:23:24You've had all my money.
00:23:25What more do you want?
00:23:25Look, Steve.
00:23:27Should we get back to work and stop talking about who gets to touch up, Tiger?
00:23:31Oh!
00:23:33Hey, come on, boys.
00:23:34Stop.
00:23:35Come here.
00:23:35Come here.
00:23:36Frick.
00:23:36We need you.
00:23:37Come here.
00:23:37Come here.
00:23:38Come here.
00:23:38Calm down.
00:23:39Come on, child.
00:23:40It's up.
00:23:41It's in it up.
00:23:42Oh, gosh.
00:23:42Fuck is your offense, man.
00:23:44Jesus Christ.
00:23:46Fuck.
00:23:48What happened?
00:23:50You shouldn't be here.
00:23:51It's not safe.
00:23:52I was going to call, but I got scared in case Tony bugged the phone.
00:23:55That's paranoid, darling.
00:23:57No, not anymore.
00:23:58It's not.
00:23:59Tony has seen the application.
00:24:01He knows all of our plans.
00:24:02What?
00:24:04How?
00:24:09Freddie.
00:24:11You got your copy?
00:24:30We should probably get someone to fix that.
00:24:34I'm for bed, darling.
00:24:37Oh.
00:24:38Back green lawns.
00:24:39It's in the Great Gardens, too.
00:24:41Come and watch with me.
00:24:42And here I am, surrounded by a...
00:24:43Laugh at Valerie's gruesome borders.
00:24:45...yellows, greens, blues...
00:24:46Yeah, it's all right.
00:24:47...oranges, indigos, all the colors of the rainbow.
00:24:50And who's this little collection of colorful characters we have here?
00:24:53See?
00:24:53She's got loans.
00:24:53...rambler.
00:24:55I think he's a little camera shy, don't you?
00:24:57And what's the inspiration behind this piece of landscaping here?
00:25:00Oh, well, James...
00:25:02What does she feed those enormous clavioi?
00:25:04Same thing she feeds her children.
00:25:06To me.
00:25:08And reflected it does.
00:25:10Almost blinded.
00:25:11Oh, look.
00:25:12Poor James is the same color as the marigolds.
00:25:16She looks like she's dressed for Ascot.
00:25:19Lady Valerie of Bulgaria.
00:25:21What's your secret?
00:25:22How do you grow such whopping glass?
00:25:24Well, James, I feed them with growmore.
00:25:26And obviously I'll take them very high so they're...
00:25:31Whoopsie-daisy.
00:25:31Ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:25:36It's Robert.
00:25:38Viva!
00:25:39Jackie, we find out why there's a dog off the lead.
00:25:41I, uh...
00:25:42...dose them on my table.
00:25:43She's in front.
00:25:44Come on.
00:25:49What's that?
00:25:50Are you ready?
00:25:50A little small one.
00:25:51Hang on for one moment.
00:25:53Jackie, ready?
00:25:53Oh, yes!
00:25:55Shall we try that again?
00:25:57I think I'm ready.
00:25:58Bear away.
00:26:01Come on.
00:26:11Viva seems besotted with Miss Cook, doesn't he?
00:26:16It's rather like he knows her.
00:26:29It's rather like he knows her.
00:26:32A little girl.
00:26:33Oh, no, no, no.
00:26:37No, no, no.
00:26:39No.
00:26:46No.
00:26:52No.
00:26:53No.
00:27:04the day of reckoning arrives could we say the application was just sitting on freddie jones's
00:27:09desk makes them sound appallingly careless i'm not sure we want to admit to trespassing and
00:27:16theft do we it's a fair point the best way to take advantage of this little windfall is to pull
00:27:21apart every idea they've got poor scorn on every word they say this afternoon we've got it all worked
00:27:28out right tony absolutely no question it's ours never pays to think something's definitively
00:27:41yours in my experience let's not rest on our laurels just yet
00:27:51emotions are riding high in rutscha in the battle for control of the central southwest television
00:27:56region the franchise holder carinium will go head to head at a public meeting with new consortium
00:28:01venturer led by tv presenter declan o'hara mp and former olympian show jumper rupert campbell black
00:28:08and tech wizard freddie jones they've got the charm but can they convince the iba that they've got the
00:28:15chops to catch the crumb
00:28:21when two tribes go to war point is all that you can score
00:28:28when two tribes go to war point is all that you can score
00:28:36hey
00:28:41i've given you back the time
00:28:45shake it out
00:28:47shake it for the black guys
00:28:50I'm afraid I saw you through the score
00:28:56When two tides could walk
00:29:33Why the candles? Are we on television?
00:29:35I was for the evening news. Don't stare at them, they'll look like a game show
00:29:39Hello, look, there's Charles
00:29:40Hello, Charles
00:29:41Henry, try and remember who's on his side
00:29:43Will you?
00:29:44If you need help, just ask
00:29:49I'm better on the side
00:29:50You can get on that, Ruby
00:29:51Yeah
00:29:52Good idea
00:30:00We know coming to Carinium, I don't understand
00:30:03Listen, it's Daddy's big day
00:30:05I'm here to support him
00:30:11I'm just going to find a seat
00:30:13No, no, no, you're up here with us
00:30:15Rags, hags sort of bunch, aren't they?
00:30:17Spent half the time fighting each other, apparently
00:30:20Embarrassing
00:30:21Yes
00:30:23Well, you can talk with it
00:30:31Goodness, all human life is here
00:30:34Mostly pond life over that time
00:30:36What the hell is B.T. Johnson doing here?
00:30:42Hello, darling
00:30:49Is everything okay?
00:30:54Love you
00:30:59Ladies and gentlemen, the meeting is about to begin
00:31:01This consultation aims simply to determine if the new company, Venturer, has the capacity
00:31:08to be a contender for the Southwest Central franchise
00:31:11We will inform Venturer by telephone later in the evening if they may submit a formal franchise
00:31:16application
00:31:17And however, in the meantime, this is an opportunity for you, the public, to give both sides a good grilling
00:31:25So, are there any questions from the four?
00:31:29Yes, lady at the back, over there, with the very tight perm
00:31:35Can I please ask both teams when you're going to start showing bingo on the telly?
00:31:39Well, we're absolutely committed to bringing as many different sports to the viewing public
00:31:45So, if there's an appetite for bingo, absolutely
00:31:47Ah, yes, I was rather wondering if James might sign my blouse
00:31:53Yes, my company's been developing satellite television for a while now
00:31:56Dishy Daniel won't be leaving four men went to mow this next series
00:32:01Venturer, we've got plans to show polo
00:32:04I'm sorry that the Chipping Sodbury W.I. feel we've disproportionately covered news from Cotchester
00:32:08So, Venturer, are going to harvest this technology for domestic use
00:32:12That's something that we've got and corinium haven't
00:32:15Oh, and yes, I would be delighted to sign your blouse
00:32:20We'll ensure he removes his shirt at least once an episode
00:32:27Yeah, we'll keep it on the network if it's popular
00:32:30Well, um, I'll respond to that if I may
00:32:34The underdog team over there might expect to retain all of your favourite programmes
00:32:38But I'm afraid they belong to corinium
00:32:43Cots will round up, ladies and gentlemen
00:32:45Imagine a world without that sofa, James
00:32:49No master dog
00:32:50No Dorothy Dove
00:32:53And, ladies and gentlemen, what that means
00:32:57Is no more four men went to mow
00:33:00Sorry, lads
00:33:01What a dreary prospect
00:33:04And what about the future?
00:33:07Our newest output brings us to a whole new frontier of entertainment
00:33:12Most imminently, we're replacing our tired old talk show, Declan
00:33:16With a brand new format
00:33:18And a new presenter
00:33:20Joining Sarah Stratton in her first ever television job
00:33:25Celebrity gossip columnist, B.T. Johnson
00:33:34Heading up uncensored
00:33:37The naughtiest
00:33:39Most gossipy show on the independent network
00:33:42Because that's what we do at corinium
00:33:45We serve you the television you want
00:33:50Your station
00:33:52Now and always
00:33:57Because who wants to feel like their television station
00:34:00Is some rich man's second hobby?
00:34:05Honestly, what does Rupert Campbell Black know about broadcasting?
00:34:14I know people
00:34:17I know this area
00:34:19From representing you all in Parliament
00:34:20I've knocked on a damn sight more doors than Tony Battingham has
00:34:24And look at the audience
00:34:26That have come today to support Venturer
00:34:28We've got Cotchester Council gardening team
00:34:31The Chipping Sodbury W.I.
00:34:34Bisley Ballroom Dancers
00:34:35The headmaster from Rugbra and the lads
00:34:38From Cotchester Rugby Football Club
00:34:40Ventura! Ventura! Ventura!
00:34:44They know a good team when they see one
00:34:46This lot, a team?
00:34:48A team?
00:34:49Ask Rupert where he got that bruise
00:34:51There are a bunch of amateurs
00:34:54Brawling
00:34:55And bruising
00:34:56And bedding other people's wives
00:34:59The drama should be on the screen
00:35:02Not off it
00:35:13No, you're right
00:35:17They do deserve better
00:35:25You deserve better
00:35:29You all deserve better than the shice Tony Battingham's been pumping into your living rooms for all these years
00:35:38You deserve better than endless quiz shows
00:35:41That cost nothing to make
00:35:43And nourish nobody's soul
00:35:45Yes, they have a good drama
00:35:48But one
00:35:48One good drama
00:35:50We will make dozens
00:35:52There will be Venturer shows all over the network
00:35:55So you can be proud of the work that comes out of the central southwest
00:36:01We're not in this to make money
00:36:03We are in this to make joy
00:36:08Because what is television for?
00:36:11I don't think Tony Battingham's asked himself that in a very long time
00:36:16Christ it shows
00:36:18You know what I think it's for
00:36:22Community
00:36:24People used to sit around the fire for their stories
00:36:29Now we sit around the television
00:36:31We point our chairs at the corner of the room
00:36:34And that is where we commune
00:36:38Television has the power to bring us together
00:36:42To help us forgive each other
00:36:47And we've had a stupid fight
00:36:53To give us a window
00:36:56Into others lives
00:36:59To bring new ideas
00:37:01Into our homes
00:37:05It is, I believe
00:37:08The greatest art form man has created
00:37:11I got into this business
00:37:12Many years ago
00:37:14In the pursuit
00:37:15Of truth
00:37:17And integrity
00:37:20And I still believe in both
00:37:23And you deserve better
00:37:27And we will move mountains
00:37:29To give you better
00:37:30If you put your faith in us
00:37:32And give us a chance
00:37:41To give us a chance
00:37:42To give us a chance
00:37:55To give you better
00:38:02Thank you
00:38:08I've spent months fighting this. When does it ever stop?
00:38:11We don't know the verdict yet.
00:38:13Oh, Christ, do you see Gosling's wizened face
00:38:15light up at Declan's blarney lyricism?
00:38:17Then we have the swear campaign.
00:38:19More scandal, more dirt.
00:38:21Ginger, you wouldn't know dirt if it shut itself into your face.
00:38:24Do you have any idea of the size of dirt you've managed to miss this week?
00:38:26You were supposed to be my fucking eyes and ears.
00:38:30Get better reports from Helen fucking Keller.
00:38:37Well done, darling.
00:38:39Thank you, sweetheart.
00:38:46I meant what I said.
00:38:48I just hope that it works.
00:38:50You were just brilliant.
00:38:52Everybody talks about it.
00:38:53Thank you, sir, Alan.
00:38:55Where's he going, all these people?
00:38:56Hello, Agatha.
00:38:57Bet you didn't expect this lot.
00:38:59Sorry we're a bit rowdy with you.
00:39:02This is from all of us.
00:39:04Yeah, Rupert.
00:39:05I reckon she's the keeper, don't you?
00:39:08Oh, mate, she's our top striker.
00:39:15We did good, right?
00:39:16We did okay.
00:39:17Hey.
00:39:18Hey.
00:39:20It's all back to yours.
00:39:21Apparently.
00:39:40And why didn't you tell me he was bringing in BT?
00:39:43I didn't know.
00:39:44I don't know what the hell he's doing.
00:39:46When something's going on with him, he knows something, or I...
00:39:49It's okay.
00:39:50We're going to win this.
00:39:55And what if we don't?
00:39:56I'll look after you, whatever happens.
00:39:58Okay?
00:39:59Promise.
00:40:00Can you come to the Priory?
00:40:04I'm supposed to be here, but I'll slip away if I can.
00:40:17Come on, Sarah.
00:40:19Lizzie.
00:40:20Lizzie, listen.
00:40:20Um, Sarah's not coming out.
00:40:23Do you just go in and see she's all right?
00:40:25Oh.
00:40:26Oh, I think you could go in if it's your wife, Paul.
00:40:29Look how we see coming out of the ladies.
00:40:31I'm a Member of Parliament.
00:40:32Look, let's go grab a drink.
00:40:33The womenfolk can join us later.
00:40:54Sarah, are you all there?
00:40:59Um, I must have eaten something.
00:41:06Nerves.
00:41:09That woman.
00:41:11Why has he put me with her?
00:41:14My big chance, and then it's her.
00:41:18Bloody Tony.
00:41:20Do you know, I've spent my life running around after these men
00:41:23who just can't be trusted.
00:41:24And they have all the power.
00:41:27They just squeeze us out like toothpaste.
00:41:30Not even toothpaste.
00:41:32They don't need us at all.
00:41:33Oh, I think they do.
00:41:37But fuck them, right?
00:41:42We should stop putting them first.
00:41:46Do what we want.
00:41:48Not just the right thing.
00:41:50All the time.
00:41:53I'm not sure I've ever done the right thing.
00:42:01I've got to go.
00:42:02Your husband's looking for you.
00:42:12I thought I told you to fuck off.
00:42:16No, darling.
00:42:18It's me.
00:42:26I'm here to say, come home.
00:42:31Archie's waiting in the car.
00:42:32Why do I have to bring the boy to see his father being humiliated?
00:42:35We both know it's not that you're angry about.
00:42:40But perhaps this is a test.
00:42:45It's time for you to decide.
00:42:48I've been loyal all of these years.
00:42:51But even my stoicism has a limit.
00:42:54So do be careful.
00:42:57Come home tonight and let's talk about it.
00:43:02Because if you don't, I'll take the children to my sisters in the morning.
00:43:19Would be rather a thing to win it, though, wouldn't it?
00:43:22I love you guys.
00:43:27I need nothing, mate.
00:43:39Legs on that end.
00:43:41I think I might be in there.
00:43:42You fucking idiot.
00:43:45What if Declan finds out?
00:43:46Not to mention he's a friend and it's wrong.
00:43:49You've never objected to a bit of wife-sitting before.
00:43:56Goodness, when did you get so morally fibrous?
00:44:00Damien, it's on the piano.
00:44:01She's fucking amazing.
00:44:07So, what happens now?
00:44:08We're just waiting on Lady Gosling to call to save.
00:44:11We're through to the next round.
00:44:13You sure you can't stay?
00:44:15Yeah.
00:44:16I've had a lovely time.
00:44:17But they're tired, so I'll take them home.
00:44:21Fingers crossed.
00:44:23Thank you, darling.
00:44:24Thanks for coming.
00:44:25I'm really proud of you, Fred Fred.
00:44:35Love you.
00:44:38Stop slouching, Sharon.
00:44:39You look like a potato.
00:44:46Turn around, bright eyes.
00:44:49Every now and then I fall apart.
00:44:51Turn around, bright eyes.
00:44:55Every now and then I fall apart.
00:44:58And I need you now tonight.
00:44:59Have another drink.
00:45:00Sit down and relax.
00:45:02And I need you more than ever.
00:45:05And if you won't be home in time, we'll be holding on forever.
00:45:13I guess I might just get right.
00:45:16And we'll never be wrong together.
00:45:19We can make it to the end of the time.
00:45:22You're not the time you're shining on me all of the time.
00:45:28Don't know what to do when I'm always in the dark.
00:45:31Living in a powder keg and giving off balls.
00:45:35I really need you tonight.
00:45:38Forever's gonna start tonight.
00:45:42Forever's gonna start tonight.
00:45:44Hello.
00:45:46Hello.
00:45:49Hello.
00:45:54Hello.
00:46:12I'm still a bloody black.
00:46:15Do you think you'll get it?
00:46:17Lots of hurdles to jump yet.
00:46:19I think we did a really good job tonight.
00:46:24So, is this a night off then?
00:46:40Have you got any idea how fucking beautiful you are?
00:46:59How are you?
00:47:01Surprisingly well, frankly.
00:47:04Mother knew me this morning.
00:47:07First time in months.
00:47:09Made me feel like life is possible.
00:47:13And I wanted to say to you, that even if you can't love me, then I think friends would be
00:47:18rather nice.
00:47:25Charles, I think I found someone to marry.
00:47:29Goodness.
00:47:31Well, she's a nice girl from a good family, and she likes me in the right way.
00:47:39Do you like her?
00:47:41I think we get on rather well.
00:47:44I really think I could bear to be married to her.
00:47:46Especially if it meant everyone would stop asking me why I'm not married.
00:47:50It'll give me the respectability I need for my career, and...
00:48:12I don't know if I can live without this.
00:48:15Without you.
00:48:54I've never done this before.
00:49:00I've never met anyone I wanted to do it with before.
00:49:37It's so nice to feel soft for ever coming on with.
00:49:55I'm going to declare this an area of outstanding natural beauty.
00:49:58I'm going to declare this.
00:50:39What's going on?
00:50:44I'm going to London.
00:50:47Malhar offered me a part in a doll's house.
00:50:52I thought you didn't get it.
00:50:54It's a different part.
00:50:57It's the maid.
00:50:58You're playing the maid?
00:51:00Yeah.
00:51:02Declan, yeah.
00:51:06Because, as it turns out, I'm not a star anymore.
00:51:12As it turns out, I spent too long following you around.
00:51:18For wherever you want it to be.
00:51:21There for the children so that you get to do what you want to do.
00:51:26I want to work.
00:51:33I need to work.
00:51:36And you, of all people, should understand that.
00:51:47And if you'd been even remotely available to me recently,
00:51:52you would have been part of that decision, but you weren't.
00:51:56So I made it myself.
00:52:08We need you here, love.
00:52:12You actually don't.
00:52:15Good luck with the franchise bit.
00:52:17Mummy.
00:52:18Tag, stop her.
00:52:19She said she's going to London to do a fucking play.
00:52:21I am going to London to do a fucking play.
00:52:25And I should never have left it this long.
00:52:30Goodbye, my sweetheart.
00:52:36Please don't go.
00:52:38Maud, please.
00:52:51Did she get that?
00:53:04Hello?
00:53:06Yes.
00:53:07Hi.
00:53:07Lady Gosling.
00:53:09No, no.
00:53:10Of course, no.
00:53:10I appreciate you calling.
00:53:22Yes!
00:53:23Yes!
00:53:28Yes!
00:53:29Yes!
00:53:30Yes!
00:53:30Yes!
00:53:30A miracle.
00:53:33I'll be involved.
00:53:35Not sure.
00:53:49Yes!
00:53:52Yes!
00:53:59No!
00:54:13Leaving already?
00:54:18Should we pop to my office?
00:54:20For what?
00:54:23Never asked me that before.
00:54:33Across the country, regional television franchises are being renewed, often with incumbents sitting pretty remaining unchallenged.
00:54:42How long have you been sleeping with Rupert Campbell Black?
00:54:47I don't know.
00:54:54What am I having?
00:54:55Just a bit.
00:54:59What's that?
00:55:00Just there.
00:55:01Oh, yeah.
00:55:01That's exactly it.
00:55:03Can you imagine how to shoot?
00:55:04It's true.
00:55:06That's right.
00:55:07No.
00:55:08No.
00:55:09No.
00:55:12No.
00:55:14No.
00:55:15No.
00:55:16No.
00:55:17No.
00:55:17No.
00:55:19No.
00:55:21No.
00:55:35I was spying on him, on Venturer.
00:55:37Oh.
00:55:40So what information did you fuck out of him for me?
00:55:44Turns out I'm not a very good spy.
00:55:46Oh, don't fucking goad me.
00:55:49There is no-one in the world you could sleep with.
00:55:53He is the worst man in the world.
00:55:57You knew that.
00:56:01Oh, you fucking reek of him!
00:56:09I'll give it whatever you want.
00:56:11I'll bring my solicitor tomorrow.
00:56:13I'll start the divorce.
00:56:14I'll do anything, just swear you will never let that man touch you again.
00:56:20Just let me have this one, please.
00:56:24Mm-mm.
00:56:26I'm sorry.
00:56:31I will sack you so hard!
00:56:33You can't sack me.
00:56:35I'm resigning.
00:56:36Your visa's tied to your job, darling!
00:56:38I'll make sure you're on a first plane back to America!
00:56:41I will marry Rupert.
00:56:46Then I can stay.
00:56:50Venturer might have won this battle.
00:56:52Have they won the war?
00:56:54That's the question on everyone's lips.
00:56:56They have been successful putting together an impressive war,
00:57:00comprising the great and the good of Venturer.
00:57:03People used to sit around the fire for their stories.
00:57:08Now we sit around the television.
00:57:11That is where we commune.
00:57:14Television has the power to bring us together.
00:57:16Fuck you!
00:57:22To help us forgive each other.
00:57:24We've had a stupid fight.
00:57:28To give us a window into others' lives.
00:57:32To bring new ideas into our homes.
00:57:36Where's mommy?
00:57:37It is, I believe, the greatest art form a man has created.
00:57:44Hi.
00:57:46Hi.
00:57:48Come on!
00:58:01Seb's a nice boy.
00:58:03You all right?
00:58:05Yeah, he's lovely.
00:58:06He's a good sort.
00:58:07Yeah.
00:58:10Only he's not you.
00:58:16Okay.
00:58:20I don't know why I just said that.
00:58:22I think I'm tired.
00:58:31Here's the franchise.
00:58:33I cannot.
00:58:35I'm trapped.
00:58:36I can't get out of here.
00:58:37I'm not asking you to.
00:58:41She's not you.
00:58:45I can't breathe without you.
00:58:49I can't breathe without you.
00:58:50I can't breathe without you.
00:58:54I can't breathe without you.
00:58:56I can't breathe without you.
00:59:01I can't breathe without you.
00:59:01I can't breathe without you.
00:59:04I can't breathe without you.
00:59:06I can't breathe without you.
00:59:06I can't breathe without you.
00:59:06I can't breathe without you.
00:59:06I can't breathe without you.
00:59:07I can't breathe without you.
00:59:07I can't breathe without you.
00:59:08I can't breathe without you.
00:59:08I can't breathe without you.
00:59:09I can't breathe without you.
00:59:10I can't breathe without you.
00:59:10I can't breathe without you.
00:59:12I can't breathe without you.
00:59:16I can't breathe without you.
00:59:41First ever television job.
00:59:44Celebrity gossip columnist, Beatty Johnson, turning up uncensored.
00:59:50The naughtiest, the most gossipy show on the independent network.
00:59:56Because that's what we do at Carinion.
01:00:01We serve you the television you want, your station, now and always.
01:00:40The naughtiest, the most gossipy show on the internet.
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