- 8 hours ago
TFI Unplugged Season 1 Episode 3
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FunTranscript
00:37And happy sunny Saturday if you have a team playing in the championship final day tomorrow.
00:43What a great week it's been for the footy as the burning question continues to be if Arsenal end up
00:49winning nothing and Tottenham end up being relegated, which set of fans have had the worst season?
01:00Here with the definitive answer is our chief football correspondent Ali Talksport-McCoyst.
01:07What a welcome. There's only one answer to that and the answer is of course Tottenham.
01:11Yes, yes. And I'll give you the reason why on the devastation scale it would be a greater devastating blow
01:17to Tottenham and their fans being relegated than Arsenal going for a quadruple and winning nothing.
01:24Yes, I accept there will be extreme, extreme disappointment over at the Emirates.
01:29However, the blow of relegation and the prospect of that stadium and that team playing in the championship next year,
01:39Chris, is unthinkable.
01:43So now you know. All right, let's do this.
01:48It's your land. It's your land. It's your land. It's your land.
01:58All right, from Pete.
02:00Chris, Will?
02:01Yes, Pete, Will!
02:03Will!
02:14What news, Will?
02:23Will, ignore them. What news?
02:25Chris, I have an idea.
02:28What about fit look-alikes?
02:33Fit look-alikes?
02:34Fit look-alikes.
02:36Normal people.
02:38Who look like fit versions of famous people.
02:45Like this.
02:55I think it's a winner. I think they like it.
02:58By the way, the channel don't like, they love TFI trumps.
03:02Great.
03:03Let's do it again.
03:04All right, I'm going to go for it.
03:05Will play cellophonist musical instrument.
03:07OK, I've got the boy with the dancing eyebrows.
03:11Fun factor.
03:1383.
03:1492.
03:15CHEERING
03:31Where am I?
03:32OK, I've got...
03:3396.
03:35LAUGHTER
03:37Where am I?
03:40I have got Chris opens ten bags of crisps with one hand.
03:45I've got Will's cameo in Oscar Wilde movie.
03:48Oh!
03:51Fun factor.
03:5282.
03:5497.
03:55CHEERING
04:01Three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten!
04:10Hats off.
04:10Hats off.
04:11Very good.
04:11OK, it's one all.
04:12Very good.
04:12OK, we should have a decider.
04:13All right, I've got something new.
04:15OK.
04:15Three darts, one throw, underarm.
04:18High score wins.
04:18What?
04:20All right, trust me.
04:21OK, let's have a game of darts.
04:24All right, I'm going to play for your look-alike, hiding in a cupboard.
04:28All right, here we go.
04:30Oh!
04:33Chris, you've scored 12.
04:35All right.
04:37OK, and I am playing for Stephen Fry's singing Cool Britannia.
04:41OK, 12 to me.
04:42OK.
04:57Two rules for the price of one.
04:59Something like a thing.
04:59Moving on, here's KSI.
05:11Oh, man, I took a punch from KSI.
05:15I was trying to dap you up, but then you just went straight for the hog.
05:19Sorry, mate.
05:20We're so excited to have you.
05:22All right, here come the KSI headlines.
05:24Headline number one.
05:28Oh!
05:31As of midnight last night, KSI now has over one billion followers on social media.
05:41Headline number two.
05:44Oh, my God.
05:48The reason Mr. Beast hasn't been seen this week is because KSI ate him for breakfast on Tuesday.
05:57Headline number three.
06:07After Anthony Joshua and Tyson Fury finally signed a contract to fight each other, KSI is here to announce the
06:14day that he'll fight the winner!
06:20And that concludes the KSI headlines for today.
06:23How was that, Lee?
06:28It's not even 9 a.m.
06:32What is going on?
06:34What is going on?
06:34KSI, I was watching your first ever YouTube video yesterday from back in 2010.
06:38Yes.
06:38What are your memories of it?
06:40So, I remember when I recorded the video doing it.
06:46So, obviously, I rapped after it.
06:48But during it, I remember sweating because I was the only guy who was searching the story and I had
06:58five other people I had to kill and I had literally to do it all on my own.
07:02And I was like, oh, my God, this would be the best video ever if I managed to clutch it.
07:07And I did.
07:08And then I was like, yo, I need to make a rap about this.
07:13So, I slapped it in Sony Vegas and just edited away and then put it up and people loved it.
07:22They did love it.
07:23How quickly did you get your first million view vid?
07:28I think it took me like five, six, seven years.
07:34Years?
07:35And when was the first non-gaming video you did?
07:39What was the content there?
07:40So, I did a video where I showed my face and I lost subscribers.
07:53By the way, who's laughing now?
07:57It is.
07:59That's so funny, man.
08:01Yeah, yeah.
08:01But, you know, that's just how it was at the time.
08:05But, yeah, no, you know, now I just...
08:08What did you do on that video when you first showed your face?
08:10Well, I basically explained the history of my name.
08:14So, like, what KSI Logite Bt means.
08:17So, KSI used to be a Halo clan that I just took the name from.
08:24Logite was my actual name, first name.
08:27And Bt was British Telecom.
08:35So, I'm forever just promoting Bt.
08:38British Telecom?
08:39Yeah, yeah.
08:40And now you've stuck a G in there and you're forever praying Britain's got a talent.
08:43Yeah, yeah.
08:44Nice.
08:45Your first million video, what was that?
08:48Did you celebrate?
08:49Was it a big day for you?
08:51I think my first million video was me talking about Heskey.
08:58But about how bad he was.
08:59Right.
09:00Yeah.
09:01Who was he playing for at the time?
09:03Oh, I couldn't even tell.
09:04It might have been either Aston Villa or Liverpool.
09:06One of the teams he played for.
09:08It might have been one of those.
09:09Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
09:10Yeah, yeah.
09:12Have you ever met Emil?
09:13Yeah, yeah, yeah.
09:14We're good now.
09:15Yeah, yeah, yeah.
09:15Oh, we're good now.
09:16Was that a bit of like...
09:18Yeah, yeah, he's a big guy.
09:20Yeah, you're a big guy.
09:21Yeah, stop.
09:22It's not why he started boxing, in case you met him one day.
09:25Yeah, yeah.
09:26That is so funny.
09:28And then the boxing came in.
09:30Was that the next thing?
09:31So the music was the first thing.
09:34Right.
09:34And it's so funny.
09:35Like nowadays, I'm always just getting trolled for my music.
09:38Yeah, yeah.
09:39The guy who came on Britain's Got Talent and dissed you.
09:43Yes.
09:43He did the diss rap.
09:44That was hilarious, man.
09:45So I've actually reacted to his raps before in a YouTube video.
09:51So he's on a thing called Rap Game, where, you know, you have different rappers going
09:57head to head at each other and just saying the most outrageous stuff.
10:01So to see him on Britain's Got Talent just being so nice to a certain degree was quite
10:10interesting.
10:11Yeah.
10:11So it was the music and then the boxing.
10:13All right.
10:14You've got a new show, which I love, called Make Me Laugh for $1,000.
10:18Yeah.
10:18Nice.
10:19Have you seen it?
10:19Oh, my God.
10:21It is so funny.
10:22I mean, it can be quite inappropriate at times.
10:25Yeah, definitely.
10:26And you leave it all in because that's the way YouTube rolls, isn't it?
10:29Yeah.
10:30I guess it's just people try all types of things to try and make us laugh.
10:35So it's an enjoyable series.
10:37And I think I've given out over 500,000 pounds.
10:43And that's very Mr. Beast-y.
10:45It's just laugh.
10:46And Mr. Beast-y.
10:47Wait, there's someone cha-ching.
10:49Well, it is a cha-ching, isn't it?
10:52It's just sound effects.
10:53It's got a cha-ching.
10:54It's on the radio.
10:55And Mr. Beast was a guest, a judge or a guest target or whatever you want to call it.
11:00So it was me, Mr. Beast and Tariq.
11:02Tariq as well.
11:03Yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:03How well do you know Mr. Beast?
11:05Pretty well.
11:06Pretty well.
11:06When did your paths first cross?
11:11Oh, that's a good question.
11:13You've worked with him.
11:14You've hung with him.
11:14I mean, I've seen him several times.
11:16I've talked to him several times as well.
11:18Just talked about the YouTube and how to, you know, improve, how to create better videos.
11:23Wow.
11:24Yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:24Like, the strategy behind it.
11:26I mean, he is the governor.
11:27Thumbnails.
11:27Yeah.
11:27Yeah, but I mean, you're pretty darn good.
11:29But, you know, you...
11:30Well, I'm getting there.
11:31Like, I'd say last year I started taking YouTube seriously.
11:36Yeah.
11:37And why are you laughing?
11:40Because you were pretty good at it when you were messing around.
11:44Can you imagine?
11:46I'll focus now.
11:49We've got a quiz for you because we've got a present for you.
11:51What?
11:51No, we haven't got a present for you.
11:52That's a lie.
11:53We've got a prize for you, all right?
11:55Oh, do I have to win the prize?
11:57Yeah, you've got to win the prize.
11:57Okay.
11:58Okay, this is TFI Friday.
11:59About to become KSI Friday.
12:01Future host here.
12:02By the way, just well done on everything, mate.
12:04No, thank you, man.
12:05Oh, my gosh.
12:05You're having all the fun.
12:06And why the heck not?
12:07Come on, having all the fun.
12:09All right, so we've got a YouTube quiz for you, all right?
12:12And if you get some questions right, we'll give you a prize.
12:15Some?
12:15Well, just any.
12:16I just want to give you the prize, that's all.
12:18Okay.
12:18All right.
12:19Sure, man.
12:20Here we go.
12:20So, it's our brand new, just thought about five minutes before the show, KSI Friday YouTube
12:26quiz, all right?
12:27Yeah!
12:28Woo!
12:28Woo!
12:29Okay, question number one.
12:32What is the most viewed YouTube video ever?
12:36Um, oh, it's probably a song.
12:39Um, Despacito.
12:41It's, well, Despacito is the second most viewed ever.
12:46Despacito has 7.9 billion views.
12:50Okay.
12:50Um, what do parents go for?
12:53Wait, do I not know the...
12:55What, what do parents...
12:57Oh!
12:57Don't tell him!
13:00Oh!
13:01Baby Shop!
13:02It's the right!
13:06All right.
13:07What is the name of the very first video ever uploaded to YouTube?
13:11It's a zoo video!
13:16You're not telling him all these answers, are you?
13:18If you are, this is a very strange way of handing your P45 in, all right?
13:22Um, what's the first YouTube video to reach a billion views?
13:26Oh!
13:27Yeah?
13:29Wapangangnamsthal!
13:29Yeah, baby!
13:30Wap, wap, wap, wap!
13:32You've already won the prize, by the way, but...
13:34Well, now I'm just having fun!
13:36And your final question...
13:37Yes!
13:38Um, should you choose to accept your prize?
13:40Ooh!
13:40Okay.
13:42Which KSI album reached number one in the UK official charts?
13:45Oh, I know this one!
13:47Yeah!
13:49All over the place!
13:57You've won our first and only KSI Unplugged Mug!
14:01Yeah!
14:04Yeah!
14:05Yeah!
14:06Yeah!
14:06Yeah!
14:06Yeah!
14:06Come on!
14:07And unfortunately...
14:07And unfortunately...
14:09Yeah, no, we have.
14:10Sorry, we did it with the...
14:11What did we do it with?
14:12The whiteboard penn used all our budget!
14:17Okay, and unfortunately, that's all we've got time for with KSI, right?
14:25When's Graham Norton back on?
14:29Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it is legend time.
14:32It's Sir Lenny Henry!
14:43I'm so happy for you.
14:45Look at this.
14:46This is where you need to be.
14:48Yeah, the desk's got magic in it.
14:49It's now got magic on the other side of it.
14:51It's Sir Lenny Henry!
14:53Can I sign this for you?
14:55You can sign it, Lenny.
14:56You can do anything you're darn well like.
14:58You're back on the road, and it's like in a minute's time.
15:01Yes, in a minute's time.
15:02It's Monday, and I hope I remember it all.
15:04And I'm just so excited.
15:05I love that your staff now are fully committed to being on telly now.
15:09Yeah.
15:09It was radio.
15:11They used to be miserable in the morning.
15:12They've changed.
15:13They've all got their lippy on, especially the bloke.
15:15Do you want to go and get the guests?
15:16Yeah, yeah, yeah.
15:17Hang on, I'm not even zipped up or anything.
15:19Hang on, we're on telly.
15:20Ta-da!
15:21Hooray for Hollywood!
15:23La-la-la-la-la-la-la-Hollywood!
15:26Lenny, you're back on the road, man.
15:28Yeah.
15:28It's a heavy lift, isn't it?
15:29It's a heavy lift, because I've not done it for 15 years,
15:32and my missus is literally looking at me going,
15:34really?
15:34This is what you're going to do now again?
15:37Didn't you do this?
15:38I still love that my family are trying to blag their way into Doodly,
15:40which is sold out.
15:41It's sold out in the first two minutes,
15:43and all my family rang up with stuff.
15:44That's so good.
15:45Uncle Len, apparently I can't get into Doodly Town or all.
15:48Can you fix it?
15:50Do you know anybody?
15:51I mean, we'll...
15:52Oh, no, me!
15:53Yeah.
15:53What I've missed is this ability to be fluid on stage and to be a fishy.
15:58You've got to be a fishy, because, you know, you've got your material that you've spent
16:01ages thinking about and writing, and respect to all the comedians who do it.
16:06It's really...
16:06Comedy is hard, but it's not working in a factory.
16:09You said to Outside before the show, you said it was a tipping point.
16:12Either you do it again or you don't do it ever again.
16:14Well, yeah.
16:14It's like playing King Lear.
16:15You know, there's a time when you play King Lear, and there's a time when you definitely
16:18don't, and I think coming back when you've got ideas and you're still watching television
16:22going, why are they doing it like that?
16:24Or a woman...
16:26Literally, I went to the theatre at the Old Vic, watching a Greek...
16:29I don't know why I was there.
16:30Watching a Greek play, and a woman, 15 minutes from the interval, threw up into a pint glass
16:36and gave it to me.
16:37Oh, my God!
16:39Literally, and I'm like, is this like a two-star review from the stores?
16:43What the hell is this?
16:44There will be some FAQs.
16:46You know, four or five nights in, you're going to know what those questions are.
16:48I think so.
16:49Do you have an idea what they are?
16:50I mean, there's going to be...
16:51They want to talk about Tiz Was.
16:52Tiz Was.
16:53Yes, I do.
16:54Literally.
16:54No, it's what...
16:55What was it like when we spit the dog?
16:58It's like, it was a hand puppet.
17:00Yeah.
17:00What would you say about Tiz Was?
17:03What do you think?
17:03Where are you going to go with that?
17:04Because it's like...
17:05I don't know.
17:06What I do is, there's clips in the part two, so I can show loads of clips.
17:09So I've got me and Trevor McDonald.
17:11Trevor McDonald comes on and says, and I go, hello, Daddy.
17:16How is Mummy coming along?
17:17So there's all of that.
17:19So it's really joyful and joyous, and there's bits of the show.
17:22The sun will come out tomorrow, and I'm sorry, can you next?
17:26And what do you mean?
17:27Well, you know, you can't be Annie because you're a six-foot black man.
17:30It's because I'm a black man, isn't it?
17:32So there's all of that.
17:33So it's a joyous evocation of a career that hasn't finished yet, which is great.
17:40Starts in Shrewsbury.
17:41Yeah, starts in Shrewsbury, and we're doing the Hackney Empire.
17:44And can the lady who keeps talking to me at the Hackney Empire just wait for some...
17:51There's a woman, when I did Live Unleashed, and I see this woman, and I know, because she
17:56wants to enjoy the show, and I know this because she's got some Tupperware, and she's got jollof
18:01rice and chicken, and she's sitting there, and she's really enjoying the show, and she's
18:04eating, and then she said, yes, because my husband used to do that.
18:08I'm going, no, don't stop.
18:09No, no, no, no, this is me doing the...
18:12Oh, God, my daughter is exactly the same as that.
18:16Please don't interrupt anymore.
18:18Oh, God, tell them to want about Do Tami Cooper.
18:21And I'm like, this is my feature film.
18:23This is my stand-up comedy feature film.
18:24Stop interrupting.
18:25But actually, it was brilliant, and she made the film.
18:28She was in the film.
18:28That is so cool, man.
18:30You don't seem nervous at all.
18:32Well, I've been doing this since I was 15.
18:34Yeah.
18:34I've had people going, no, you're a good lad, but we've not had any colored lads here.
18:37Just move around so they don't throw shit at you.
18:39You know, I've had that.
18:40So, I am a bit nervous, but I can't wait.
18:43Yeah, you can tell.
18:44It's like...
18:44You are raring to go on.
18:46It's like Do Tami.
18:47You're going to burn the clutch out.
18:50It's like that.
18:52Lenny Henry is back on tour.
18:56Sir, Lenny Henry.
19:01Still to come, Robbie Williams.
19:04But first, I'm T5 Go from Gwen Stefani.
19:07And no doubt.
19:08Yeah!
19:09I don't think that you know what you're saying.
19:13Let's hope you stop explaining.
19:16Don't tell me because it hurts.
19:19I know you're not.
19:21But no, don't think.
19:23I know what you're thinking.
19:26I don't feel the reason.
19:29Don't tell me because it hurts.
19:33Don't tell me because it hurts.
19:35Hush, darling.
19:38Oh, hush, hush, darling.
19:41Oh, hush, hush.
19:44Don't tell me because it hurts.
19:57Oh, my gosh.
19:58How good was that?
19:59Gwen Stefani, no doubt.
20:00Don't speak back from 1907.
20:02What an iconic performance on one of her first ever performances on UK TV.
20:05Pretty good.
20:07Robbie Williams on the way.
20:08But first, it's World Cup Genio.
20:18I haven't got time for that.
20:19OK, Chris.
20:20Yes.
20:20I am about to drink that beer out of that glass without touching either glass.
20:25Can't be done.
20:25Can't be done.
20:27No way.
20:28Demand, Demand, Demand, the fraud.
20:30He's a fraud.
20:34He's a liar.
20:36He's a liar.
20:37Have you finished?
20:39Have you finished?
20:40OK.
20:41Can be done.
20:44Prove that.
20:45I will.
20:46Drum roll, please.
20:47That's the Chevrolet bit.
21:03Unbelievable.
21:15How I've missed these days is Robbie Williams Day.
21:38Roberto.
21:40Roberto.
21:41Welcome to the start.
21:45Evening, Chris. Evening, Nigel and the boys.
21:49Hair pie, Robbie?
21:51No, I've just had my slim fast, I'm all right.
21:53You've just had your slim fast? Yeah.
21:54You've got a thing about your weight at the moment, haven't you?
21:56Yeah, well, yeah, look at that.
21:59I came in three aisles before and I saw there was a side shot,
22:02and I thought, I've got to keep my hand...
22:03Can I go back to that camera?
22:05I'm going to keep my hand there for all of that.
22:07Well, we could just stay on that camera if you like.
22:09Triple chin.
22:10I mean, all right.
22:11See, it's not how you look, it's who you are, Rob.
22:14It's what's inside and not what's outside that counts.
22:17Okay, well, you're in the mood to talk, aren't you?
22:19Yes.
22:19Okay, let's talk then.
22:20Did take that split up because they thought you were going to spill the beans on them in court?
22:24Well, I don't know.
22:27I've read in many different things that that was the case,
22:30but would I do something like that?
22:32Would I? I mean, would I? I mean, would I?
22:37I might!
22:39All right, then you see, it was like this.
22:43Were you going to spill the beans on them in court?
22:45Was I going to spill the beans on them in court?
22:46There was nothing to spill.
22:47The dispute in court wasn't about me and take that.
22:49It was about me and the record company, but see, the thing is, I love the boys.
22:57You're a bunch of some kids.
23:02Did you stop them bringing out the Greatest Hits album? Was that because of you?
23:05I just put something right there. It wasn't that I was stopping anything coming out.
23:08It was just that the Greatest Hits, obviously, I sung on all of the Greatest Hits.
23:14Yeah?
23:14Yeah!
23:16So, I just wanted to see what was going in the album and what the art design was about.
23:22And that's all I was asking.
23:24Okay, but they brought it out.
23:25They said that you were causing them problems bringing out that Greatest Hits album.
23:29Is that right?
23:30No, I did, yeah.
23:31You did?
23:33Chop work, Rob. Chop work.
23:35Excellent.
23:35Are they stopping you from bringing out your new single?
23:37It's a bit daft, really, because I've got the royalties to come in on it.
23:39You've got a lot of royalties to come in. About half a million quid, I read.
23:41Is that right?
23:42I think so, yeah.
23:43Don't believe what you read. It's a million.
23:45A million.
23:46All right.
23:48Are they stopping you from bringing out a single now?
23:50Because I know you've got stuff ready.
23:52Due to things that I can't talk about.
23:56Yeah.
23:56Yes, they are.
23:59It's not anything to do with, take that.
24:01Unfortunately, do you know what?
24:03It always worries me coming on the television programmes to do anything, interviews and stuff.
24:07But what really worries me is when me lawyer turns up.
24:12Can somebody give Robbie's lawyer a large whisky, please?
24:15It's all right.
24:16Well, I'm not going to say anything about the record company.
24:19Okay.
24:19I will.
24:21Okay, it's not take that, but you are having problems releasing your single, aren't you?
24:24Yes.
24:24Okay, can you tell us why or not?
24:26Because I know why, but...
24:26Because I haven't recorded anything.
24:28No, but also...
24:28No, no, I'm joking.
24:30No, I'm joking.
24:31I'm joking.
24:32I'm joking.
24:32I'm actually...
24:33I'm in the studio.
24:34I've written about 30 songs.
24:35Right.
24:36And, er...
24:37I actually can't say why I'm having troubles, but...
24:40No, I know.
24:41I don't want you to say anything you're going to get in trouble for, so don't do that.
24:43No, no, it's...
24:43Go as far as you can, and then back up.
24:45Okay.
24:46All right.
24:46Am I allowed to say why you can't bring your single out?
24:49Chris, I...
24:50I...
24:50It's up to you.
24:52No, I can't.
24:57Listen, what we'll do is we'll take legal advice on that from your lawyer, seriously,
25:00and in part two, if he says it's all right, I'll tell you why.
25:02We can't bring you to that.
25:03Okay.
25:03Okay, what did your letter to the Sun say yesterday?
25:05Your open letter in the Sun.
25:06My open letter?
25:07It was just, erm...
25:09It just said, why don't we get together and do a show, do it all for charity,
25:13and give something to the fans, because you see, I'm...
25:16I feel a bit aggrieved that I didn't have a proper ending when I left Take That,
25:20that I didn't have a chance to say...
25:21I don't want to come across all bros, or anything, but I didn't...
25:24I didn't...
25:25Does that rhyme?
25:26Put that in the Sun.
25:27Yeah, actually I have.
25:28Oh, right.
25:29But, erm, I want to say, I want to say thank you very much for the people that put me
25:32there,
25:32and, erm, adios, and see you in the future career.
25:35But they're saying you did it very publicly in an open letter in the Sun,
25:39either A, because they wouldn't talk to you, or B, because you wanted to get publicity out of it.
25:42I mean, what's the truth?
25:43Well, you see, the thing is, Robbie as a character is, er...
25:46an absolute tabloid maniac anyway, so I don't need my profile rising in any way.
25:51I didn't do it for a publicity stunt.
25:53I asked their...their...
25:54John Preston, the...the guy at their record company...
25:57Did I say there, then?
25:58The guy at the record company.
26:00Erm...
26:00Supposed to be your record company, wasn't it?
26:02Oh, yeah.
26:02The guy at the record company, and I don't think he put it to them, so...
26:06I wanted to do it in public anyway, because...
26:08You wanted to make sure they knew, basically?
26:09I just wanted to.
26:10Alright, okay.
26:10And I like seeing me in the press.
26:12What did they say in the reply last night that they issued?
26:16Er...I don't know...blah, blah...
26:17What was the gist of it?
26:18Well, the gist was, there was only one reason that their manager doesn't like me.
26:22So, that was the only reason.
26:23There's nothing...I mean, it's...do you know what I mean?
26:25There's no other reason, but...er...we don't like Robbie.
26:30Er...but...
26:30Are we bigger than that, boys?
26:31Well, but...
26:32Yes!
26:33There were...
26:33Are we bigger than that?
26:35Yes!
26:36There were a couple of quotes, though, from Gary and Jason, weren't there?
26:39And, er...Nigel Martin-Smith, the manager you're talking about, I'll take that.
26:42Is it true that he's still sending you invoices, charging you for his management?
26:46Well, the thing is, he hates me, but he loves taking the money off me.
26:50But you...can you fire him as a manager, or are you not allowed to do that?
26:52I've got a new manager that I love and trust dearly.
26:55It's Tim Abbott, he's over there.
26:56So I've got my new manager, and my contract ran up with, erm...Nigel.
27:01Er...last year.
27:03But he's still sending you invoices, is that true?
27:05Yeah, yeah, but...I don't know, I have...I've got a lawyer end of all that.
27:11No, I don't want you to get in trouble.
27:12No, I'm not getting in trouble.
27:12Yes, he has sending me invoices and, erm...should I pay?
27:15Should I pay?
27:16No!
27:17I'll take you all out for a round if I don't have to pay.
27:20Yay!
27:21It's free in here anyway, you fools.
27:24So, how do you feel about...let me ask you how you feel, A, about Nigel Martin Smith at the moment.
27:29How do you...can you sum up how you feel about him?
27:32Er...there's not actually a lot that I could say about Nigel.
27:42Er...this...it's like...
27:44Alright, OK.
27:45Alright.
27:48What can I...what can I say?
27:49I think we've found an illegal loophole.
27:50I, er...I...I...I...I...I...I...I love the guy.
27:52OK.
27:52Now, what do you...what do you think about, er...about Gary Barlow?
27:55Because he said something yesterday that wasn't very nice at all.
27:58Yeah, look, the funny thing was, right?
27:59He said...he said...when I...this is what I read in the Arena magazine.
28:02and it said, because I read things like that,
28:05it said, when I saw a Robbie at the MTV Awards last time,
28:08or should I say, when I saw a Robbie at the MTV Awards last time,
28:11it changed, he wasn't the same person that we knew.
28:14His hair was different and his ears had grown.
28:19It's like, oh yeah, well, my hair grows because it grows,
28:22but ears always stay the same.
28:25Gary Barnard said today in today's Daily Mail, he said,
28:27Robbie hurt us and until now we were afraid to say,
28:29but Robbie, you're a dickhead.
28:31How do you feel about that statement?
28:32Well, I am.
28:34It's obvious everybody can read about it.
28:36I am, you're not putting anything out of it.
28:38Do you think they've been advised to come out and say,
28:40OK, this is what we're going to...
28:41I mean, Jason Orange said,
28:42it's a cheap trick to get sympathy and public support.
28:44I mean, how do you feel about Gary and Jason and Mark and Howard now?
28:48Well, you see, it's obvious that if you're dictated and conditioned
28:50for so long into a certain regime,
28:52that you're going to carry on with the same thing,
28:54and the boys, bless them,
28:56don't know anything different to what they're in.
28:58Do you still think they've been told what to say?
29:00I don't believe, for one instance,
29:02they're being told what to say.
29:03There's nobody going,
29:04you say this, you say that.
29:06But there's somebody guiding them around it.
29:07There's somebody guiding them to tell what they've got to say.
29:09Bearing in mind all that's happened, right,
29:11and, er...
29:13Do you regret...
29:14I just want a yes or no from you now, Bob.
29:17Do you regret leaving Take That When You Did?
29:20Yes or no.
29:21No, no, I didn't leave, I was sacked.
29:23Yeah, I know, it doesn't matter how you left.
29:25How do you...
29:25But would you have preferred to have been there
29:27and done a farewell tour without leaving?
29:28Because it was only six months after...
29:30Well, I would have loved to have done the tour.
29:31Right.
29:32I was going to leave at Christmas,
29:33I would have loved to have done the tour.
29:34So you're still happy that you left?
29:36I'm...
29:36I'm really...
29:37I couldn't be more happy than I am now.
29:38I'm doing my own thing.
29:39Right.
29:39I'm writing my own stuff.
29:42Um...
29:42I'm...
29:42I can shag birds.
29:46You're in love at the moment, aren't you, aren't you?
29:47You're checking.
29:48Shag me a girlfriend.
29:50That's right.
29:52I just thought I'd better mention that.
29:53All right, yeah.
29:53All right, well, good luck anyway.
29:55So, er...
29:55We've got to wrap up now.
29:56We've already gone over time.
29:5720 seconds, what are you going to do in the next three months?
29:59Er...
29:59There's going to be singles out.
30:01I'm going to be in films.
30:02I've got my own line of clothes out.
30:05I'm painting and decorating.
30:07Everything that I've just said...
30:08Everything that I've just said, apart from the...
30:11Apart from the music, was lies.
30:14Robbie Williams, everyone.
30:19Oh, we're picking a day in the Radio Times.
30:23TV is really dying.
30:25All right, next up, the stars of Criminal Record Series 2
30:28is Chris Jumbo and Peter Capaldi.
30:39Oh, my gosh.
30:42Welcome, welcome.
30:43The show is back.
30:44The show is back.
30:45The show is so good.
30:46Oh, my gosh.
30:48Oh, I mean, the first series of Criminal Record,
30:51five-star reviews across the board.
30:52For people who don't know,
30:54would you like to explain to them what the heck I'm banging on about?
30:57Well, we're two cops who don't really get on.
30:59Yeah.
30:59Because, obviously, we're from other ends of the scale.
31:01I might be described as a dinosaur.
31:03Yeah.
31:04And Chris is a go-getting, young, bright thing.
31:07Your wife's in charge.
31:08Your actual wife's in charge.
31:09My actual wife is the boss.
31:10And so, if she says, jump, you say, how high?
31:13Exactly.
31:14But it's great to have her around because she's also very frank
31:16and she can say, you're not really going to do it like that.
31:18Yeah.
31:19Okay.
31:19And she makes sure that I try to not overact too much.
31:22What does your wife's...
31:23Because your wife really is the boss, isn't she?
31:24Yeah.
31:25She really is the boss.
31:26What does she say to you that other people in charge don't?
31:30That's terrible.
31:31She'll say, that's terrible.
31:32You can't do it like that.
31:33Right.
31:33I don't believe that for a second.
31:34No, because, of course, your character moonlighted in season one as a chauffeur.
31:39Yeah, but that really happened to me.
31:41This is how it all started.
31:43I was going to the BAFTAs on one occasion.
31:46Yes, sir.
31:48And I fell into conversation, as I do with the driver,
31:50and the guy started chatting to me.
31:51And every time we passed a bit, a street, he'd say,
31:55you know, there was a terrible mudder up this street here where this happened.
31:58And down there, there was a terrible stabbing and all that.
32:00But what is it?
32:01I said, are you ex-army?
32:04He said, no, I'm a detective.
32:05I mean, I work for the Met.
32:08But I said, what are you doing driving us to the BAFTAs?
32:13And he said that the BAFTAs use a lot of detectives
32:17because they're all trained with a fast driving.
32:20Yeah, and reversing away from trouble.
32:22With a Sweeney driving.
32:23Yeah, yeah.
32:24And he said, it's good money.
32:25And I thought, this is a brilliant way to start a show.
32:28So that's the first scene in the first season.
32:30And is that where that idea came from then?
32:32Or were you already together, though, making the show?
32:34No, that was before we'd done it.
32:37And so you wanted to work together anyhow.
32:41Yeah.
32:41Right.
32:42And then somebody, your wife said, look, this has to happen.
32:45But you didn't know what.
32:47You just knew that you had to find a vehicle for it.
32:49We had both.
32:50Well, obviously, you're married to Elaine.
32:52Elaine, I'd worked with Elaine on Vera years before.
32:54Did you get some best with Elaine?
32:55You or you?
32:56Oh, definitely Peter.
32:59She's the best.
33:01She is.
33:01Me and her have the same haircut.
33:03Clearly we're friends.
33:03Yeah, you do, actually.
33:04You really do.
33:05No, we all love Peter.
33:08So.
33:10Can she go further with you because you're her husband?
33:13Yeah.
33:14As to you because you're not her husband?
33:17Yes, but I would listen to anything Elaine told me.
33:20Right.
33:20It just so happens that it's all, you're amazing.
33:22Right.
33:24Elaine's becoming legendary.
33:25Yes, she'll be horrified.
33:27She's going to love this.
33:28She'll be absolutely horrified that we mention that.
33:31Let's hear it for Elaine, everybody.
33:34And also Peter Cabanet.
33:37First jump out.
33:39Purple record, season two, it's out now and it's killer.
33:43Okay, okay, what have we got?
33:46So far, we've got the Pet Shop Boys, Bjork and the Divine Comedy.
33:51Oh, we're just singing.
33:53Yeah, that's right, Gov, yeah.
33:55Thanks, Oz.
33:55No, no, no, that's no good.
33:57No, you tell the Pet Shop Boys they'll be needed for questioning.
34:01Gov, they're not going to like that.
34:02The Pet Shop Boys haven't said a word to anyone for years.
34:06Look.
34:09Chris.
34:11Chris, you've come from a council estate in Warrington.
34:14I mean, I know that.
34:15But look at you, look at you now.
34:17You've got big house, you've got flash cars,
34:19you've got gorgeous girls, much too pretty for you.
34:22You've got articles in the newspaper slagging you off.
34:25You're a star.
34:27Now, you go out there and you tell the Pet Shop Boys that you want an interview.
34:33Well, okay, Gov, but only if during your interview you answer the question about why you always get your kit
34:38off in Prime Suspect.
34:44All right, still to come on TFI Unplugged, Ali McCoyst and Dodgy.
34:49But that's more TFI goal from the one, the only Pet Shop...
34:52I don't want to hear that but if you're in Japan, and only if you must find them standing in
35:15your way.
35:37Our next guest is a whole seven feet of wrestling legend.
35:42He's here to tell us about AEW All In London,
35:46which will be taken over Wembley in August.
35:49So please welcome to our big show,
35:51a man with all the height and all the fight,
35:54it's Paul White!
36:16I feel like Gandalf when he went into Frodo's house.
36:19Yeah, on a good day.
36:21Oh, my goodness.
36:24The chair's about!
36:27All right.
36:27How are you, big show?
36:29I'm good.
36:29I'm scared to cough or I'll have to take the chair home.
36:31Yeah, oh, my gosh.
36:33Well, we're not going to stop you.
36:34By the way, you take anything you damn well like, it's fine.
36:37I have heard that when you were choosing a new toilet for your bathroom...
36:42Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.
36:44It had to pass the 23 golf ball flush test.
36:49Well, it wasn't it past the test.
36:50It was the salesman that told me about this that hooked me.
36:54It's called a big job.
36:56I'm not getting paid for this, by the way,
36:57but if you want to pay me for it, I'm happy to endorse it.
36:59By the way, why wouldn't you employ big show?
37:01I don't know.
37:02To advertise your big show?
37:03Well, we don't want to employ that guy.
37:05We want to employ Paul White
37:06because we don't own the name to the other guy.
37:09I didn't mean that.
37:10There you go.
37:11Big show who?
37:12But this is your big show here.
37:13Yeah, okay, fair enough.
37:14All right, anyway, somewhere I'm getting paid.
37:17No, that was the thing when the guy was selling me the toilet at Home Depot.
37:20He goes, oh, yeah, I've got to show you the big John.
37:22And I went, the what?
37:23The big John?
37:24He goes, yeah, it's bigger.
37:25I mean, the seat's bigger.
37:27Yeah.
37:28It's taller.
37:29Yes.
37:29Like, you would sit on it and your little feet would dangle.
37:31Yeah.
37:32You know, but he says, he goes, it'll flush two dozen golf balls.
37:35And I said, really?
37:38This is a real thing.
37:40I said, because I'm going to go home and I have a golf bag with range balls in it.
37:43I'm just saying, I don't know how they got in my bag.
37:45I'm not saying I stole range balls.
37:47You're saying.
37:49And I said, sure enough, I put golf balls in there and hit the mixer.
37:51And I was like, okay, this works.
37:53Wow.
37:54This works.
37:55But here's the one thing I will say about it, because the toilet seat is set up to where
38:02it fits the seam of the bowl when it closes, when you're sitting on it, and it's a wider
38:07seat.
38:08And if you have a bigger bum, you can create a vacuum effect.
38:15So you don't want to be sitting down when you hit the mixer, because it will frighten
38:21you.
38:21Kind of like being on an airplane bathroom, if you've ever been out there, whoosh, do you
38:25like that?
38:25Like, I think the first time it scared me a little bit.
38:27I think it took my soul with it.
38:29So from now on, we take care of business, shut the lid, and then walk away.
38:32So many questions.
38:33I mean, I know you're here to promote AEW All in London, but there's so many questions
38:37just about this particular conversation.
38:39Yeah.
38:40Hey, everybody poo.
38:41Everybody does number two, right?
38:42Isn't that the book?
38:43But I'm thinking, you know.
38:44I might do three and four as well, but anyway.
38:46No, I'm kidding.
38:46I'm kidding.
38:47I'm kidding.
38:47Okay.
38:48You eat a lot less than you did.
38:49When you were at 538 pounds or whatever it was.
38:51Yeah.
38:52Good.
38:52Wow.
38:52You did your research.
38:53I did my research.
38:54I like that.
38:55Nowadays.
38:56That was a quarter ton of fun.
38:57Yeah.
38:57And so give us like a typical day's menu.
39:01Back in the day when I was wrestling, running hard, traveling, doing all that, and the amount
39:05of food I was eating, I was probably eating 12,000, 13,000 calories a day.
39:10You fought against Hulk Hogan?
39:12Yes.
39:12You fought against the Rock?
39:13I'm grateful.
39:14Yeah, of course you are.
39:14I'm grateful because I came into this business.
39:16I was young.
39:17I was 21 years old, and I was working with Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Ric Flair, Arne Anderson.
39:22And there were guys that I grew up as a kid watching that now I'm competing with, they're
39:27mentors, they're friends.
39:29What about Hulk Hogan?
39:30You do a mean impression of Hulk Hogan?
39:32I do.
39:33It was a risky move because when you do an impersonation of someone, they can either like
39:37it or they can hate it.
39:38And wrestling was very hard to get into back when I tried because you had to know someone.
39:43Someone had to vouch for you.
39:44It was kind of like getting into a crime family.
39:46You know, because nobody wanted to bring in somebody that wasn't part of the fold or
39:50wouldn't do well.
39:51So my first thing was my buddy, who didn't know anything about wrestling, he was, hey,
39:55do your Hulk impersonation.
39:56I said, well, let me tell you something, brother.
39:58I've been to the top of the mountain, dude.
40:00So what are you going to do when the largest pythons in the world come for you?
40:07Hulk's eyes got really big, and he goes, you've got a dollar sign on your forehead,
40:11brother.
40:11I said, well, please show it to me because I is broke.
40:15Well, there was room for a giant then, and there's been room for a giant on our show.
40:18It's been great to meet you.
40:19Thank you so much.
40:20People have been so excited about you coming in.
40:21And I've got to tell you, a serious compliment, wow on the research.
40:26Wow.
40:27I mean, a lot of times, I mean, I've done a lot of these interviews, but my goodness,
40:31man, this has been fantastic and a true pleasure.
40:34Well, it's an honor and a privilege, so there you go.
40:36Well, thank you very much.
40:37Can we hear it, please, for Paul White?
40:43Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Mike Tyson.
40:46I'm welcome.
41:00Okay, okay, okay.
41:01Okay, he's in there somewhere.
41:02Mike.
41:05Oh, come on, man.
41:07Eddie, come on, man.
41:10okay okay guys okay respect okay Mike are you in there uh yes Chris yes I am
41:17all right still to come Ali McQuist and Dodgy perform live not together
41:22Ali's gonna be on Dodgy gonna perform live I mean technically they will be able to perform
41:27live but she won't be singing the old won't be singing but first some people are singing
41:31tfi girl from
42:06Oh, I love that song.
42:07Eurythmics and 17 again from January 2000.
42:12If it ain't our chief football correspondent,
42:14the award-winning Ali McCoy.
42:19Ali, which award did you win this week?
42:21Sports Youngness.
42:26Ali, that makes you our star of the week.
42:32Deep joy. Deep joy.
42:34Now, that is an honour.
42:35I am thrilled.
42:36I've never been happier to receive the star of the week award.
42:40However, I've got to be honest,
42:42I don't think I fully deserve it.
42:44Oh, what?
42:45No, no.
42:46How come?
42:46I think there's only one person should win it, Chris.
42:49Who? Who? Who?
42:51I'm going to tell you who.
42:53Joe at reception.
42:54Oh!
42:56Shall we re-award?
42:57Let's do it.
42:58Please welcome Joe from reception!
43:12You're officially this week's star of the week.
43:14Tell us what happened to you.
43:16So, Saturday, we got up, done our chores,
43:21and we said, let's go and get some Turkish food Saturday night.
43:25So, we were standing in the restaurant,
43:27and I was like, can you see what I'm going?
43:28It is her.
43:30I'm sure it's her.
43:31So, the wife's going, I don't know.
43:33I'm not sure.
43:33She ain't got her glasses on.
43:34I was like, no, but it is her.
43:36I'm sure.
43:36So, I was like, oh, here we go.
43:38Here we go.
43:39So, it was like, just go and ask her.
43:40Just go and ask her.
43:42So, she came round the corner,
43:44tapped me on the shoulder, and was like,
43:46oh, my God, it is you.
43:47Joe from reception!
43:50Here we go!
43:52Whoa!
43:53Your mum and dad would have been so proud.
43:55They would have been so proud.
43:56They're looking down on me, so proud.
43:57Because you used to watch the show together, didn't you?
43:59Yeah, yeah, yeah.
44:00And you said, one day, what did you say to them?
44:01One day.
44:02One day, I'll make it on television.
44:04Yeah!
44:04I've done it!
44:06I've done it!
44:07I've done it!
44:08All right, well, you have won the right to tell.
44:10Everybody watch on the show next week.
44:11So, coming up on TFI Friday next week.
44:14Whoa!
44:17We have absolutely no idea!
44:22Bye, he's done it!
44:24Yeah!
44:27Staying out for the summer
44:29Playing games in the rain
44:33Hills and the fortune
44:36Got me fooled again
44:40See, I work in a factory
44:42I don't want to be made
44:46Got these debts to pay for
44:50They're gonna have to wait
44:55If I ever see you again
44:58I will tell you why
45:01I was low and insecure
45:05I didn't want to make you cry
45:10Well, my good's and bad
45:12It's just my luck
45:14That you're not on my side
45:17So, what happens now?
45:20Where did you go?
45:21But with these feelings
45:24Staying out for the summer
45:37And love's worth lying
45:39The pockets I've never met
45:43They've got me working all hours
45:46I ain't gained nothing yet
45:52If I ever see you again
45:55I will tell you why
45:58I was low and insecure
46:02I didn't want to make you cry
46:10Well, my good's done bad
46:13It's just my luck
46:14You're not by my side
46:17So, what happens now?
46:20Where did you go?
46:21With these feelings I rise
46:25Staying out for the summer
46:28Playing games in the rain
46:32Builds and the fortune
46:34We'll be the same again
46:39Staying out for the summer
46:42Staying out for the summer
46:44The summer lasts forever
46:48The summer lasts forever
46:58Staying out for the summer
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