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00:00Previously on Celebs Go Dating.
00:03I need to break those.
00:04I could snob your face off.
00:07Our celebs got hot and horny with their chosen plus ones in the canaries.
00:11Listen, I'm down for daddy.
00:13But then the agents dropped a beefy barbecue bombshell.
00:16We would like to introduce you to some new faces.
00:20No way! Oh my God!
00:23Killeen, James and Lucinda went straight out on dates with their fresh fitties.
00:28This is powerful. Wow.
00:30And wasted no time getting cosy.
00:34If you don't ask, you don't get it.
00:36And tonight...
00:37We're here!
00:39The remaining dates get wet.
00:41I'm tired of seeing all, not staring at you too much.
00:43But then it's crunch time.
00:45This is where shit gets real.
00:47As the celebs get face-to-face feedback from their dates.
00:50The sexual chemistry wasn't there.
00:52I want somebody who's going to give me everything.
00:55Greedy.
00:56And face arse-clinching decisions.
00:58I just wanted a bit more bath.
01:00I'm going to say no.
01:01As our celebs!
01:02Sexy, baby!
01:03I might be asexual.
01:04Go!
01:05You've got a great body.
01:06Dating!
01:07I always pick pricks.
01:09That might be why you're single, Carl.
01:15Welcome to Celebs Go Dating, where it's our last day in tenors.
01:20In a room full of people I love for you.
01:24And with half the celebs decompressing after yesterday's canary aisle curveball,
01:28David, Gabs and Stephen are waiting to find out what the agents have planned for this morning's date.
01:33I actually really enjoyed yesterday at the barbecue.
01:36Yeah.
01:37Sounds like morale's high.
01:39And then there was obviously that lovely twist.
01:41There's such lying bastards.
01:43Ah, that's more like it.
01:44When Joelle came in and straight away just more sauce.
01:48Like that.
01:48And more confidence.
01:50How you do it?
01:52Big Friends fan, was he Gabs?
01:54Yours is really pretty.
01:56Yeah.
01:57I think she's got, like, a cool vibe about her.
02:00She just looked effortlessly, like, cool.
02:02So, did you know what I mean?
02:03Yeah.
02:04We'll see, won't we?
02:06Everything okay, Stephen?
02:07To be honest, the last two dates I've been on haven't exactly gone swimmingly,
02:11so I'm a little bit apprehensive about what the agents might have planned for the next one.
02:17Oh, Jesus.
02:19Oh, God, what?
02:20Anna's message me.
02:21Here we go.
02:23Hi, guys.
02:24Hope you packed your swimmers, because David, Gabby and Stephen,
02:27you are off to get wet and wild at the water park along with your dates.
02:32Have fun.
02:33I know you're going to, and I cannot wait to see how you guys all get along.
02:38A water park?
02:39Wet and wild, baby.
02:41Is this your idea of health?
02:45It'll be fun.
02:46It's not very sexy, but then, do you know what I mean?
02:50Because I'm not like a drying dog.
02:52Well, if you can lick your own balls, I doubt you'll have any complaints from your date.
02:59So while half the celebs head off in search of slip and slide vibes at the water park...
03:04Come on, guys.
03:06Let's get wet.
03:07Let's get soaking wet.
03:09Back inside, Lucinda is making another kind of splash with less chlorine and more protein,
03:14as the rest of them digest last night's surprise date.
03:20How did your dates go last night, by the way?
03:22Look, I mean, it was pretty sexy.
03:24Resist?
03:25I'm not going to lie.
03:26Did you kiss?
03:27We did.
03:28I suppose I just couldn't resist.
03:31Because he had these big, gorgeous, chunky lips.
03:34And do you know what?
03:35I felt desired.
03:37Really?
03:37Yeah.
03:38Oh.
03:39What about you?
03:40How did yours go for you?
03:41Yeah, how did your date go?
03:42A nice guy, and he'd be lovely for someone, but it's just not for me.
03:46I mean, and I'm not saying that Steve's going to be the one all the way through,
03:49but I think at the moment, sexual chemistry and just chemistry is there.
03:56Best bring your lab coat and goggles next time, Steve.
03:59From my date situation, I actually didn't go in for the kiss.
04:04What?
04:04Solely because I thought it was inappropriate having just dropped the tongue into Scarlet.
04:08Ruggerbuggas are so romantic, aren't they?
04:12I dropped the tongue in.
04:13Keats has got nothing on my lines.
04:15Keats actually loved dropping his tongue into Fanny.
04:18That was his wife's name, FYI.
04:20Grow up.
04:21I get wet before you.
04:25And across the island, we're moving from Keats to our very own Byron of Bolton.
04:30Oh, my God, we're here.
04:36What?
04:37Yes, you are, Potsy.
04:39And look, he's waiting for you.
04:40It's your newest fan.
04:42Fan.
04:43Stephen's date, Clara.
04:44And Gabby's match, Joelle.
04:46Looking cool.
04:48Oh, my...
04:49Hi!
04:51Oh, Jesus, they're all dolled up.
04:53Yeah, I look like Brits abroad.
04:54Hi, guys.
04:56You's not ready for a splish slash.
04:58They are when you're pretty like that.
05:00Time to get wet, wild and sexy, baby.
05:06Getting wet and wild.
05:07We are getting wet and wild in there.
05:09We absolutely are.
05:19Somewhere out of my depth, but being at a water park is definitely keeping my mind off of what might
05:24otherwise be nerves.
05:25So much fun, so much fun.
05:30We're in the wave pool, and we're getting wavy, baby.
05:34Getting wavy and wet.
05:35When I first heard date at a water park, I thought, oh, my God.
05:41Are you ready?
05:42Yeah, go on.
05:42Paddle in.
05:43Baby!
05:44Here we go!
05:46I'm running.
05:47But getting tossed around in the waves, we've found.
05:51What a treat.
05:52Oh, my God!
05:54Get out!
06:04Hasn't seen a pair of trousers all week, and he's worried about a lost bucket hat.
06:08Jesus!
06:10Thanks, love.
06:15Let's go, Gary!
06:17An action-packed date is so what I needed.
06:19Literally, the only thing I've got to worry about is everything staying in place.
06:23Well, just in case things didn't stay in place, Joelle's got himself a good viewpoint.
06:29But, wow, Joelle is looking fit.
06:44Oh, how cute is this?
06:48Oh, my God, and champagne.
06:51Lovely stuff.
06:52Oh, it's a good one as well.
06:53How did you find today, though?
06:55Fun.
06:56I was nervous about the slide, to be fair, at first, just because I didn't know what I was
07:00going to look like when I came out of it.
07:02I was like, I've done my makeup and everything.
07:04Oh, just like that.
07:06Don't judge him.
07:06He's probably nervous.
07:07Joelle is hot.
07:09He is sexy.
07:11And I'm actually a bit nervous, to be honest.
07:14What is your type?
07:15I need someone that's confident.
07:17Yeah.
07:18And driven, and just got a bit about them.
07:23Eyes north, Joelle.
07:24Eyes north.
07:26First initial attraction has to be there 100%.
07:29Yeah.
07:29Everything else kind of follows after.
07:31So, like, when I seen you, I was just like, 100%.
07:34You didn't even ask me again.
07:35I'm down 100%.
07:36I love that.
07:37Well, this is all going swimmingly so far.
07:40How old are you, by the way?
07:41I'm 25.
07:42Oh, shit.
07:43Oh, well, it was nice while it lasted.
07:45Oh, is that an issue, though?
07:47Well, I mean, like, 25 is, like, the first year that I went on Love Island,
07:51and my life has changed so much since then.
07:54Sure has.
07:54You've now got Bobby B talking over your poolside date on a Spanish island
07:58rather than Ian Sterling.
08:03And from bougie daybeds and bubbly to sticky sun loungers and screaming,
08:08as David gets to know Fan in the family fun zone.
08:11Well, at least he's been reunited with his beloved bucket hat.
08:15Sorry, do you want to read?
08:16Thank you so much.
08:18You're welcome.
08:20Cheers to that.
08:21Cheers.
08:22Cheers.
08:23So, talk to me.
08:25Give me a bio.
08:26Hi, fam from Birmingham.
08:28Salon owner.
08:28Yeah.
08:29I'm one of 11.
08:3011?
08:3111.
08:32Oh, my God.
08:33My mum and dad didn't have a telly.
08:35They just had a creaky bed.
08:35Yeah, yeah, yeah.
08:36Freaky double bed.
08:38He's fit.
08:40Tick.
08:40He's flirty.
08:42Tick.
08:43And he's filthy.
08:44Tick.
08:45This is getting off to a very good start.
08:48Am I your usual tie?
08:52A long sip of a cocktail is never a great sign.
08:57I like, like, I like your vibe.
08:59I like your personality.
09:00I think it's really funny.
09:01Oh, thank you.
09:03Fancy return the compliment?
09:05What's your usual tie?
09:06No, OK.
09:07Do you know what?
09:08I'd say, like, usually tall, older.
09:12And I know you're shorter and younger.
09:14Shots fired.
09:16Well.
09:16I may call it three in other places.
09:17Oh, is it?
09:18Like what?
09:19Well, I'm not shorter and younger down there.
09:21Oh, OK.
09:23Call it shrunk, bro.
09:25Oh, lovely.
09:27Warm, slightly fizzy and tastes like piss.
09:30Meanwhile, after successfully avoiding any wedgie-based incidents on the slides,
09:35can Stephen finally manage to pull a successful date out of his arse
09:38as he settles down to get to know Clara?
09:42Shall we do a cheers?
09:43Cheers.
09:44Nice to meet you.
09:45Nice to meet you.
09:46Are you not an orange juice fan?
09:48It's a bit sharp.
09:49OK.
09:50You're fair sweet, I think.
09:51Yes, you're in here, Stephen.
09:53Just go with it, bruv.
09:56More bitter.
09:57Ah.
09:57Bitter.
09:58OK, cool.
09:59What would be an example of that?
10:00Dark chocolate.
10:01OK.
10:02I was going to make a really bad joke about my personality,
10:04but hopefully not.
10:08Beer is not something I want to be.
10:10That's not a bad joke.
10:11It's a dad joke.
10:12It wasn't a joke at all, was it?
10:14Fair enough, I am a dad.
10:16Listen, I was making dad jokes long before I had a kid.
10:19I've dived in headfirst with the dad jokes,
10:21and they seem to be going really well.
10:23Clara seems to be quite receptive.
10:25Things are relatively awkward, but, like, all is going all right so far.
10:30How's life?
10:31Life is all right, you know?
10:32Mm-hmm.
10:32I mean, why would you not want to come to a water park on a first date?
10:36Jump in a bikini, be half naked, go down some slides.
10:40I mean, I wouldn't normally get naked until, you know, quite a few dates along,
10:44but today I made an exception.
10:46Whoa, she is primed in on the professor.
10:49Come on, Stephen.
10:50No dad jokes this time.
10:51Think sexy.
10:53Great way to test the waters.
10:55There's a dad joke for you.
10:55There you go.
10:56Keep dropping them, it's fine.
10:57OK, better wordplay pun stuff, but why don't you just flirt?
11:01What have you learnt from this experience so far?
11:03Very little based on current evidence.
11:06Erm, that I might be asexual.
11:09Really?
11:09Fuck's sake, I'll go get your towel, mate.
11:25Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating, where at the water park,
11:28Gabby is attempting to resist the temptations of her toy boy Joelle
11:32after discovering how young he is.
11:34I mean, gripping a wine glass like a sippy cup, it's a bit of a giveaway.
11:38What are you like as a boyfriend?
11:40I feel like I'm just...
11:41Because I feel like you're cheeky and you're, like, very confident,
11:43so I can imagine, sorry to tarnish you with the same brush,
11:47but when you go out, I can imagine you to just be, like, active with the girls.
11:51No, no, no, I'm not interested in all of that.
11:53No?
11:54No, if I go out with my friends, I'm just looking to just kind of chill,
11:57enjoy the night, like, when I like something,
12:00or, like, I like someone, what, I want a goal for someone,
12:02100%, I don't believe in doing things half-heartedly,
12:05it's just pointless, it's just a waste of everyone's time.
12:06That's what I'm saying, I'm just, I'm too, I think I'm too honest
12:08for my own good sometimes.
12:10I came into this looking for someone older,
12:13but they've given me a 25-year-old,
12:15but I'm having a nice time with Joelle,
12:17so this is the problem, so confusing.
12:20I'm letting you know that I'm fully 100%
12:23liking you, do you know what I mean?
12:24A lip fight, I can't.
12:26I can't even hold it.
12:28So, from a complete flirted masterclass,
12:31over to a complete flippin' mess,
12:33and unsurprisingly, there appears to still be something
12:36on Clara's mind.
12:38So what makes you think that you might be asexual?
12:42Oh, no, just I've not felt anything
12:44throughout this process yet, it was,
12:47yeah, it's just been...
12:48Oh, Stephen.
12:51But you haven't been single for that long, right?
12:53No, six months, six months.
12:55It's just such a weird thing as well,
12:56when you haven't dated for years.
13:00Like, this is me out of my comfort zone.
13:01So, to explain, right, I'm at a point in life
13:04where I'm a year now having been diagnosed as autistic,
13:07which is obviously something I haven't caught later on in life,
13:10it's been there the whole time.
13:11Yeah.
13:11And I remember someone saying to me when I was 16,
13:13what's wrong?
13:13You never have any expression on your face.
13:16But, actually, I can be really enthusiastic and happy.
13:20And look like that.
13:21Yeah, be like, you haven't had a good time.
13:22That's what I felt yesterday when we walked in.
13:23Absolutely.
13:23Because that's what your face looked like.
13:25Oh, really?
13:25Yeah.
13:26It's been really easy to talk to Clara,
13:28and I've really enjoyed talking to her.
13:29I hope she feels similarly.
13:31Look, I don't know if this is heading anywhere
13:32or where it's heading if it is,
13:34but this is the most relaxed I've felt on a date thus far.
13:37This is more like it, mate.
13:39Progress from Pro Green.
13:41You need to have a backstory, right?
13:43Like, people need to understand where you came from
13:45and how you got to where you got to.
13:47It's the same kind of thing with my story.
13:50My mum died when I was nine.
13:52Of breast cancer.
13:53And then my sister died when I was 28.
13:55Of breast cancer as well.
13:56So I lost both of them.
13:58So, although I can talk about it and I'm fine,
14:00there's days where I'm like, I want my mum.
14:02Like, there's an unexplainable feeling.
14:04I want that.
14:05You know, like, that comfort, that love,
14:08that safety, that security.
14:10And I think it can only really, like, come from that person.
14:13So, on those days, I give myself the space to feel like that.
14:16That's good.
14:17I relate to the...
14:18Like, my dad wasn't very present,
14:20but he was one of the most prominent in my thoughts.
14:22Always.
14:23We really bonded in the times we did have together.
14:26And, yeah, I really get that, wanting to talk to them.
14:31So, as Stephen and Clara get deep...
14:34..at the shallower end of the dating pool,
14:36David and fans still have work to do
14:38if they're going to crack on with some heavy petting.
14:40How's your dates been going with Tom?
14:42Yeah, he's a really nice lad.
14:44Yeah.
14:44He's a really, really nice boy.
14:45Obviously, we're very different.
14:46Obviously, Tom's from Poland.
14:48Yeah, yeah, yeah.
14:48I'm not Jamaican heritage.
14:50You've got gravy and potatoes on the one side...
14:52Yeah.
14:52..and jerk chicken on the other.
14:53I do.
14:54I enjoy jerk chicken.
14:56I enjoy gravy.
14:57That's my man.
14:58All meat and no veg.
15:00What do you prefer?
15:01Just say jerk chicken, Dave.
15:03I mean, you can't ask me that
15:04because I'm a northerness of course.
15:06I love gravy.
15:07Maybe if you take those,
15:08a bit of jerk chicken on the side, then.
15:11Maybe a bit of cold sauce.
15:13Not cold sauce.
15:15Not cold sauce.
15:16I got that when I worked in MAGA.
15:18Nothing like a spot of herpes chat
15:19to ruin a man's appetite.
15:22What am I talking about, bringing up cold sauce?
15:25I mean, me and Van are having a great time.
15:27I really think I need to change the direction of this chat.
15:30No, I'm joking.
15:31That is an absolute joke.
15:32God, I shouldn't be drinking these.
15:34But you're going to carry on sipping it anyway.
15:44Right, that's making me feel ill.
15:46Someone give that child a dummy to shut it up
15:48and you can give the baby some milk while you're at it.
15:57Meanwhile, judging from the fact she's now horizontal,
16:00I'm guessing Gabby's attempts at resisting young gun Joelle's
16:03bulging biceps isn't going to plan.
16:05You've got a great body.
16:06Thank you very much.
16:07I know.
16:08Thank you, I'll take it.
16:10Yeah, you do.
16:12Very good.
16:13I don't know, you look really good, though.
16:15See them ocean blue eyes.
16:17I'm kind of like, they're crazy.
16:20They're like, crazy, crazy.
16:21I'm even trying to, you know, not stare at you too much.
16:24Yeah, you look like you're really straining, mate.
16:27The date is going so well.
16:29There's so much chemistry.
16:31And I'm enjoying Joelle's company.
16:33But I have to keep reminding myself that he's 25.
16:36And I need to make sure that this isn't just about getting sexy.
16:41Anyway, five years' time, go.
16:42Uh-oh, serious question alert.
16:44Look sharp, Joelle.
16:46About five years' time, I just see myself, like, I guess with my chosen women.
16:51But also, like, I just want to have, like, my business up and running,
16:54a whole piece of little ones running around.
16:56As long as I'm happy, and I'm happy with just everyone around me and what I'm doing,
17:00I'm good.
17:01I love that.
17:02That's a great actor.
17:03Fuck, he's good.
17:07So as Gabby looks set to fall back into her old habits,
17:10Stephen is finally getting to grips with a new one,
17:13holding a conversation with a woman.
17:16You've been really open, though.
17:17I've been told that I need to be more open by two people I've sat with.
17:23So you... Have you been on two dates?
17:25Mm-hm.
17:27Would you want to see me again?
17:28Come on, Pro-G, you can do this!
17:31No dad jokes, please.
17:33Yeah.
17:34Would you?
17:34Yeah.
17:35How about you?
17:36I would want to see you again.
17:38OK.
17:39Phew.
17:44I feel like it's been a really nice conversation.
17:46I've enjoyed talking to you.
17:48It's felt like the right side of challenging.
17:51Now seal the deal, PG, and get on over there and give her a snog.
17:55It's been really nice.
17:56We're going to see each other again.
17:57Yeah, sweet.
17:58Or just limp double high-five instead.
18:00Baby steps, Stephen.
18:02Baby steps.
18:02Talking with Clara was really fun.
18:04It was easy.
18:05And I feel like I was more open.
18:07I'm feeling good.
18:08It was a really nice date.
18:10We had a really good chat.
18:12Yeah, I think it was really cute.
18:13And he said that he does want to see me again.
18:15So that was like a little bit of affirmation
18:17that maybe we're moving back from asexual
18:21back to maybe heterosexual.
18:23Who knows?
18:24It's really refreshing to be able to sit down and just go,
18:26I'm a work in progress.
18:27No excuses.
18:28I'm accountable and culpable and responsible,
18:30but I am still very much...
18:33Asexual, bisexual, omnisexual, pansexual?
18:36Up for anything sexual?
18:38Clueless.
18:38Yeah, I'd probably agree with that.
18:43I wouldn't worry, though,
18:44as David's not exactly been smashing it out of the park
18:46with his yummy brummie either.
18:48Although maybe whatever they've just chucked down their necks
18:50may help things along.
18:56If only that baby had a swear jar,
18:59he'd be set for life by the end of this date.
19:01Would you say you're quite forward?
19:03I am very forward.
19:04OK.
19:05I sort of just say what I'm thinking.
19:06OK.
19:06I'm very much like Blum.
19:08That's nice.
19:09I think it depends in certain situations.
19:12I think when it comes to a situation with a boy,
19:14I'm not very forward.
19:16Like, I think I'd rather then just be like,
19:19come here.
19:19Do you know what I mean?
19:20Or something like...
19:21Yeah, yeah, yeah.
19:22Get on your knees now.
19:23Oh, my God.
19:24Oh, my fucking God.
19:27They've set the swear jar off again.
19:31Oh, my God.
19:32You've got a very nice, calming energy about you.
19:35I actually feel like we're quite similar.
19:38Yeah, I know what you mean.
19:39I think we're very cheeky, we're fun.
19:41We can both hold our own.
19:43I like that.
19:44You've got that, like, charm, charisma.
19:46That was a nice compliment.
19:49You're welcome.
19:50How do you feel the date's gone?
19:52For you or the couple with the newborn?
19:54I feel like it's gone very natural.
19:56Yeah, yeah, yeah.
19:57No, I think it's been really, really good.
20:00I would definitely want to see you again.
20:02Yes, David.
20:03But does Fan want to let you have a sip on his strongbow?
20:06Good.
20:06I'd want to see you again.
20:08Well, yeah.
20:08Cheers to that.
20:10Get in.
20:15Oh, a sign of things to come, Dave.
20:17Do you know what?
20:18That went so good with Fan.
20:20Literally, right, nice.
20:24Come on, then.
20:25Let's get you back.
20:27David made me feel really comfortable.
20:30I feel like we got on really well.
20:31I mean, it's not very often I've told someone to get on their knees and they're still sat in front
20:34of me.
20:35So, yeah.
20:38Both dates went really, really well and now I'm kind of like, where am I going with this?
20:44Like, who am I picking?
20:45Like, where is it actually going to go?
20:47It could be either.
20:48It could be both.
20:50We could do a three-way date.
20:52That'd be sexy.
20:54As long as it's not within 500 yards of the family splash zone, David, you can feel your boots, mate.
21:02And talking of hanging around the kids' area, how is Gabby getting on with her toy boy, Joelle?
21:08To be fair, I'm looking forward to another date.
21:11I feel like today was good.
21:13OK.
21:14I mean, I'm hoping you're looking forward to another date.
21:17Yeah.
21:18I am.
21:19I'm happy that we're kind of, like, on the same page, I guess.
21:21Mm-hmm.
21:22But I feel like we're just missing one more thing, though.
21:24What?
21:24I think I know.
21:26What are you?
21:30What a smooth bastard.
21:39That was a good kiss.
21:40I'll give you that.
21:41Yeah, I mean, there's nothing better than a good kiss.
21:44100%.
21:47From the moment Joelle spoke to me, there was already something there.
21:55I don't think the date could have gone any better, and it ended with a kiss a couple times.
21:59Oh, I'm smiling.
22:00I'm a happy man.
22:03He made me feel nervous, but in a good way.
22:06And comfortable in a good way.
22:08And honestly, he's impressed me a lot.
22:12He's fit.
22:14Coming up!
22:16You have a big decision to make.
22:19The agents drop an absolute stinker.
22:21This will be a little bit of a squeaky bum moment.
22:25She's mad, miss.
22:27There's no point chasing if he's not there.
22:29I'm going to say no.
22:32Fuck.
22:33My heart.
22:33If you would like to continue to see Colleen, please stand up now.
22:50Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating, where judging by those happy slow-motion walks,
22:55the celebs have been invited somewhere fun by the agents.
22:59Sunset drinks by the beach.
23:01End of tennis send-off party.
23:02Oh, maybe a game of musical chairs.
23:05What a sun-pissed bunch of beauties.
23:08A big welcome to you all for our last day in paradise together.
23:12Oh.
23:13Yes.
23:13But I'm glad that you all look relaxed and happy.
23:17Well, we want to end this trip with a bang.
23:21So do they.
23:22It's the whole reason they're here.
23:23This is where shit gets real.
23:26Why do I get the impression this party might be about to receive some unwelcome guests?
23:31Oh.
23:31My.
23:32God.
23:33My bumhole is twitching like a schnauzer's nose at Christmas.
23:38Why is there so many chairs?
23:40What the fuck is going on here?
23:42Now, at the start of this trip, we set out that the purpose was to focus solely on your
23:48datees, without the noise and the distraction of everyday life.
23:53So, have you been dating with intent?
23:57Have connections been formed?
23:59It's time for some radical honesty.
24:05We're not going to be the ones giving it to you.
24:08Right?
24:08As you can see, there are 12 seats in front of you.
24:11So I think you might know who will be filling them.
24:14Well, I'm guessing it ain't going to be the England team and Tommy Tuchel for a World Cup
24:18team photo, is it?
24:19Oh, my God.
24:20So this is a huge moment for our celebs and what this entire trip has been about, and
24:24that is face-to-face feedback.
24:26In a few minutes, we'll get a chance to learn what they've learned, if anything, from this
24:30entire experience.
24:31This will be a little bit of a squeaky bomb moment.
24:36I am so nervous about going into this feedback because I genuinely, hand on my heart, don't
24:41know what they're going to say.
24:43And, yeah, I mean, no-one likes hearing criticism about themselves, do they?
24:50I need a drink right now.
24:52I could pretend I'm not a little bit nervous, but I'm about to get feedback in front of people.
24:58Why would I be pricking it?
24:59I'm not pricking it.
25:00Of course I'm not pricking it.
25:02Gabby looks like she doesn't know whether to faint or follow through.
25:06I've done both today.
25:07Best put them out of their misery and bring on the day tease.
25:09Make you sweat like a fever On your knees, a believer
25:16So sweat, sweat I hope you got your hallelujah saved up now
25:24Hi, guys.
25:25Good to see you.
25:27Hello.
25:28Some eye-banging already going down at 12 o'clock?
25:30Eyes up, Joelle.
25:32OK, guys.
25:33Over the last week, you wonderful bunch have, of course, been dating our celebrities.
25:38And now, it is decision time.
25:44Do you want to continue dating our celebrities for romantic intentions back in the UK?
25:51Celebrities, the initial decisions are in the hands of the deities.
25:57Well, butter my bum cheeks and tickle my perineum.
26:00I did not see that coming.
26:02For the first time ever, we're shifting the power and control
26:06and taking the decision-making power away from the celebs.
26:10We want to see if they've put in enough effort,
26:13made a good enough impression for their deities to want to see them again in the UK.
26:17First up, we have the gorgeous David.
26:23Here we go.
26:24The best legs in the UK.
26:26In the world, Carla, thank you.
26:29Don't pull me down.
26:31There's Fan looking a little nervy.
26:34And David's first date was with fireman Thomas.
26:36Let's have a nice spice, yeah.
26:38Who had the hots for the pots but made him a little too hot in the gob.
26:41Oh, my God.
26:42And the reef knows how to turn the heat up.
26:44They're trying to get you to get your hauls out.
26:45But despite the early warning sirens,
26:48the spark reignited for long enough to arrange a second date.
26:52Yeah, I think it'd be nice to see each other.
26:55Tomas and Fan.
27:01If you would love to date David again back in the UK,
27:06please stand up.
27:11Oh, Jesus, please, God, no.
27:19Oh, come on.
27:21Hurry up.
27:25Oh, thanks fuck for that.
27:27My Sphinx has just sent you a thank you card, chaps.
27:36I've got to say there's only space for two gay guys in the village,
27:39and it's me and David.
27:40Sorry.
27:41Meow.
27:42Watch out, Tomas.
27:43We're retorting coming from Fan.
27:45Keep your claws at home, babe.
27:48Not so good.
27:49Good effort.
27:49Along with me, Pat Butcher, sir.
27:51Better.
27:52R.I.P. Pat.
27:54Keep going.
27:55Keep going.
27:56Dave's so excited.
27:57If you had trousers on, it'd take them off.
28:01This is madness.
28:03What have we signed up for?
28:05This is so mental.
28:08Hey, Tomas and Fan, you both stood up for David.
28:13We've got to hear from both of you to why you'd love, love to date David again back in the
28:20UK.
28:21I honestly feel like we've had an amazing date with David.
28:24We've had so much fun, and I feel like there's so much to discover about you that I'll be stupid
28:29not to try.
28:31Our date was like, you know, we had lots of laughs.
28:33We had a lot in common.
28:35Over time, that could blossom somewhere and be really nice.
28:38So, yeah, I'll leave that to your face.
28:43David, do you want to date Thomas or Fan back in the UK?
28:54I'm definitely attracted to you, Tomas, but I don't think the chemistry is there.
29:00Okay.
29:01Maybe you should have got more Frank Butcher, Tomas.
29:04I would like to date Fan again.
29:17Oh, can I sit down now?
29:20That was a tough decision, but I'm so glad that I picked Fan.
29:25There was just something about him, and I feel like I definitely need to explore that back in the UK.
29:31Lucinda.
29:32Lulu, you're up next.
29:33Yay!
29:38Lucinda's first holiday hook-up was with Larger Than Life Steve, on a date so bizarre no-one even thought
29:43to mention his moustache.
29:44You're like a unicorn, aren't you?
29:47I don't know about a unicorn, but...
29:49Yeah, like a one-off.
29:50Very rare.
29:51That's very kind.
29:53But her next date with Ken was less eccentric and more electric.
29:57I would say you're one of my times.
29:58I'm loving this.
30:00I'm loving this.
30:00I'm loving this.
30:00Come on, now.
30:04Stephen, Ken.
30:07If you would like to continue dating our Lucinda back in the UK, could I please invite you to stand
30:15up now?
30:17I hate this bit.
30:19Right, well, his tash is already fully erect, but will the legs follow suit?
30:29Yes, Ken, but what happened to Steve?
30:32Your pussy tickler get caught in something, mate.
30:34Oh!
30:36OK.
30:39Steve, I have to say, I'm good on about you guys.
30:42I'm quite surprised to see you sitting down.
30:44Lucinda and I got on really well.
30:45We had a great time talking, but I think it's like two magnets.
30:50If you get the same pole, they don't attract.
30:53There's like a gap and they can't get closer together.
30:56Yeah, it's no point chasing if he's not there.
30:58You're right.
30:58In the words of Mr Brunson, if it's not a hell, yes, it's a hell.
31:01No.
31:02He let you down with that.
31:03More energy, Paul.
31:04Ken.
31:05Yes.
31:07Have you found your Barbie?
31:09She's my warrior princess, you know?
31:11I think that was Zena, not Barbie.
31:13She was dressed amazing.
31:14She looked good.
31:15The vibe was just vibing, honestly.
31:17And my hands were misbehaving.
31:22I'm just going to stop touching her.
31:23He's had no problems with his magnets then.
31:25Were you okay with that, Lucinda?
31:26It was pretty saucy.
31:27Yeah, it was saucy.
31:28I mean, look at this man.
31:30I mean...
31:31Lucinda, do you want to date Ken back in the UK?
31:37Come on, Lucinda.
31:38Let's make this two out of two and give Ken the warrior prince title he clearly deserves.
31:43I do.
31:44She does know she's on Celebs Go Dating and not maths.
31:46Oh, Jesus Christ.
31:49I thought that was really cool how Ken stood up, claimed his territory and said his piece.
31:56And I'm kind of excited to see what happens.
31:58So, living in a dream of a world...
32:03Bye, Lily.
32:08Colleen?
32:09Yes.
32:09Please step forward.
32:10Brilliant.
32:11Colleen picked suave, smooth talker Steve to take to tennis.
32:15I have to say, and I don't want to blow smoke up your ass, unless you ask nicely.
32:21And a flirty start to the date...
32:24But I was very, very attracted to you.
32:27...led to a frisky finish.
32:33But her next date with happy chappy Andy wasn't quite so, er, romantic.
32:38I've got a little farm.
32:39What do you do on the farm?
32:41All the animal noises.
32:42That's more of a third date question, Andy.
32:44I've got horses and goats and ducks and chickens.
32:46I'm allergic to horses.
32:51Steve and Andy, if you would like to continue to see Colleen, please stand up now.
33:00Right, come on, chaps.
33:02Up you get.
33:04Come on.
33:06I can't look at my heart.
33:08Come on, lads.
33:09Got a break coming up.
33:10Up you get.
33:12Steve?
33:13Andy?
33:14Andy?
33:15Steve?
33:27Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating, where loose woman Colleen's been left hanging for an uncomfortably long time by Steve
33:33and Andy.
33:34Come on, fellas.
33:35One of you must want to date a Nolan sister again.
33:37OK, let me say that one more time.
33:39If you would like to continue to see Colleen...
33:44Please stand up.
33:46Right now.
33:50Don't let me down, guys.
33:51This is horrible.
33:52My arse always flapping about like Steve's tash.
34:00Oh, Colleen.
34:02Oh, Colleen.
34:02Bless her.
34:03That's Colleen.
34:04All right, so clearly you've made your intentions clear here.
34:07All right?
34:09This is awful.
34:10I literally want the ground to swallow me up.
34:14I'm mortified.
34:16I'm really hurt, actually, because I really did think that Steve would stand up, because I thought we had a
34:24great connection.
34:24So, Andy, you didn't stand up.
34:27What was the reason why?
34:28I think we had a lot of similarities, but a lot of differences between us as well.
34:32So, I wouldn't want to mislead you, and I know you're too intelligent, a lady, to have that happen, and
34:37I'm too respectful of you and myself to do that.
34:42Yeah.
34:43All right.
34:43Well said, Andy.
34:44So, Steve, we have to go to you.
34:47Why did you not stand up?
34:48Let's hope he's got two broken legs.
34:50Well, he will have when the loose women get hold of him.
34:53Me and Colleen, from the start, was an absolute hit emotionally.
35:00But the only thing for me, the sexual chemistry wasn't that.
35:05Oh, that's got to hurt.
35:08Colleen, how are you feeling?
35:10I thought me and Steve got on really, really, like, so well.
35:13Yeah.
35:13So well.
35:14Yeah.
35:15If there's no physical attraction whatsoever, there usually isn't a gift.
35:19She's got you there, pal.
35:26I hope that after this, that we can still be friends, and I would love to see her again.
35:32Don't push your luck, fella.
35:34He's digging himself a hole.
35:35I didn't come on here to meet a friend.
35:37I've got lots of male friends that I'd get on great with.
35:42Colleen, leave it with us.
35:45Yes.
35:45We are going to work hard.
35:46Yes.
35:47And we're going to find you your dream man.
35:48Yes.
35:49Yeah.
35:49All right.
35:49I'm going forward with a completely different perspective.
35:54You have to be transparent, and I guess that's what Steve and Andy were, and maybe I need
35:59to take a leaf out of their book, and from this moment forward, I'm going to be honest as they
36:05were.
36:06Gabby, it's your turn.
36:08Please stand up.
36:10Prior to Gabby's wetter-than-expected water park date with Joelle, she dated gym owner Carl, but his chat, or
36:17lack of it, didn't exactly flow her boat.
36:20Is there anything else you want to know about me?
36:25Oh, man.
36:27Until she eventually found the perfect solution to an awkward silence.
36:38Okay, Carl and Joelle, if you'd like to date Gabby back in the UK, please stand up.
36:46Well, this is a no-brainer.
36:49Yeah, man.
36:51Oh, God, surely Gabby's not going to get pied as well.
36:54The fuck?
36:58Woo!
36:59Oh, thank the Lord.
37:01How are you feeling, Gabby?
37:03I don't know.
37:04Obviously, it's a nice feeling, isn't it?
37:06I wouldn't know.
37:08Oh, Killeen.
37:09I don't know what you're smiling about, mate.
37:12Carl, could you please tell us why you stood up for Gabby?
37:16When we had the date, I was a little bit nervous, but then Gabby helped us out with that, and
37:20I thought that was really, like, short of personality a lot.
37:22Nice work, Gavs.
37:24Coming to you, Joelle.
37:26I'm not going to speak too much on our connection, because I feel like what's understood doesn't need to be
37:29explained.
37:30But Christ, he's good.
37:32My pants are just slipped off.
37:33Let me take some notes real quick.
37:36Let me write that.
37:39Wow, he's even given P-Dog a boner.
37:41Oh, God.
37:43I didn't want to stop kissing you.
37:45You didn't want to stop kissing me, so...
37:47It's too big to continue.
37:48Oh, my God!
37:57I think both of yous are amazing in different ways.
38:04Carl, I feel like there was so much potential when I first met you.
38:06I hope that I did make you feel comfortable, but I just wanted a bit more back, because it has
38:11to be both ways.
38:13And then, obviously, Joelle was, like, so fun.
38:17And you made me feel 10-10 from the moment I met you.
38:21I think there's potential there for us to find out more.
38:24So, I feel like it's only fair to give Joelle a second go.
38:30Joelle, come on down.
38:31Give her a little...
38:32Give her a sexy kiss.
38:34Give her a sexy kiss.
38:36A sexy kiss.
38:36A sexy kiss.
38:40Everything about you just feels so right.
38:44I had a really good first date with Joelle, so I am buzzing to see him again.
38:49See what's left.
38:52Paul, would you like to kiss Joelle?
38:54Yeah.
38:56Joelle, Paul would like to kiss.
38:59This is awkward.
39:00You don't want to go for a drink with Colleen, dear Carl.
39:02OK, James.
39:05James.
39:07James invited PT mum of two Scarlett to tennis after meeting her at the mixer.
39:12Do you like going to have a party or not, are you?
39:13No, not massively.
39:15And wasted no time in showing her his favourite workout.
39:18Like is it?
39:19The lip press.
39:23His second date was with Zara and there were few complaints from the big man.
39:27You look beautiful.
39:29Have you been here before?
39:30Must have been about 20.
39:31What's her last week?
39:33Let's move.
39:35Scarlett and Zara.
39:42If you would like to date James again, please, would you stand up?
39:48I'm used to playing in front of big crowds and big moments.
39:51But I'll be honest with you, I am very, very, very nervous at this point.
39:57Chill out, James.
39:58I reckon this is going to be a try and conversion.
40:04One down.
40:05Oh.
40:05Oh, and it's an unconverted try.
40:11OK.
40:13At least one person's dropped.
40:15Scarlett, why have you stayed sitting down?
40:18I've loved getting to know James.
40:20I think you're a kid.
40:21I really do.
40:22I just think, you know, our lifestyles aren't a match
40:26and I want somebody who's, you know, going to give me everything.
40:34How are you feeling about that?
40:36I mean, you've got to respect everyone's honesty, really.
40:38But ultimately, having listened to her story about her kids
40:42and how dedicated she is and what she wants
40:43and where she is in her life,
40:45which is to find someone to settle down straight away,
40:48my life, I do not think, would fit in with hers.
40:51I think what you've both done, actually, is very emotionally mature.
40:55I think that's very sensible.
40:56I think you are ruling with your head, not your heart.
40:58And in this case, I think that's really important.
41:01Somebody did stand up.
41:02Why?
41:03Well, very handsome.
41:06Yeah, fancy.
41:07We had a great chat and I thought it was nice.
41:09It was light.
41:10It was fun.
41:11And that's what I'm about.
41:14James, in your heart of hearts,
41:15would you like to see Zara again back in the UK?
41:19Here we go.
41:20Easy.
41:22I think, for me, I'm going to say no.
41:24What the actual fuck?
41:26This guy's full of surprises, not to mention protein shakes.
41:29I felt that you and I had a physical connection.
41:32You know, I think you're very attractive,
41:33but I've sort of thought a bit more about what I want
41:37and I probably need something slightly different.
41:39I think the old me would have definitely said,
41:42go on another date.
41:44But I think in this process, you're meant to be serious.
41:47You're meant to focus on where there's longevity.
41:50So I had to be cutthroat.
41:55All right.
41:55Stephen, please step forward.
41:58Before dating Clara at the water park,
42:01Stephen kicked off his dating journey in tenors
42:03on a second date with Jane and wingman James.
42:06But his small talk was less sexy and more depressive.
42:10My dog died two years ago.
42:11Three years ago.
42:12Don't bring them in.
42:13You're talking about your dead dog now.
42:14So this is what goes on in my head.
42:16Stop your head.
42:18OK, so Jane and Clara.
42:21If you'd like to continue dating Stephen,
42:25stand up now.
42:29Oh, my stomach's churning.
42:31I might do a day even take my trousers off for this one,
42:33just in case.
42:38Oh, get in.
42:40Good work, Steve.
42:43This is what we like.
42:45So, Jane, we're going to start with you.
42:48So the first date was a double date.
42:51It was more like a hangout.
42:53The second was a party.
42:56So we've not had an actual one-on-one.
43:00So, yeah, that's why I'm standing.
43:01Clara, why did you stand up for Stephen?
43:04We went to the water park for our first date.
43:07So, obviously, I got to see him in his swimming trunk.
43:10So that's...
43:15Exactly.
43:17We had a really great date,
43:19and I just felt like we connected over a lot of different things.
43:22For me, I was able to be myself,
43:25which I don't think I always am.
43:27It just felt like a really safe space,
43:29and that was really nice.
43:31You just used a word that we love, and that was safe.
43:33You felt safe.
43:35Look at that.
43:36Look at this.
43:37She's orgasmic.
43:37Watch it. Safe. Safe.
43:40This is music to my ears.
43:42Feeling safe indicates a far deeper connection
43:45than just surface-level chat.
43:47It's the fundamentals for any successful and healthy relationship.
43:51I am so proud of Stephen.
43:54Stephen, would you like to see
43:56either of these two beautiful ladies
43:59when we return to the UK?
44:02This is not the easiest part of the process,
44:04having to make a decision which impacts two people,
44:08but a decision has to be made,
44:10and I think I know what decision I'm going to make.
44:12I would like to see you again.
44:14Claire.
44:15It's Clara, Steve.
44:16Sorry. Sorry.
44:18Her name's Jane.
44:20What a milestone for me.
44:21A second date.
44:24Sarah's got her shit together.
44:25She seems really cool, so let's see what happens.
44:28All right, well, that is a wrap on Tenerife.
44:31Woo!
44:32What a week.
44:33Yes, absolutely.
44:34Celebrities, we want to thank you
44:36for leaning into this experience.
44:37This is never an easy process.
44:39And for our new couples,
44:43we look forward to seeing you in London.
44:45Bye-bye.
44:46See you later.
44:46Bye-bye.
44:47See you later.
44:47So, with things tied up nicely
44:49with a tiny bow in tennis,
44:51or in David's case, a bow-ner,
44:54Jesus, guys, you're going to see each other
44:55in 30 minutes at check-in.
44:57Lucinda chose Ken,
44:58Gabby picked Joelle,
44:59and Stephen went for Clara.
45:04Oh, looks like Colleen's about to test Steve a new one.
45:07I'm not one from confrontation, Steve,
45:09but I didn't come on here to find friends,
45:11so piss off.
45:12Jesus, grab your popcorn, folks.
45:15I always pick pricks.
45:18Wouldn't have worked.
45:19So that's fine.
45:21Can I have a kiss?
45:22But if you ever say,
45:23I'm not physically attractive again,
45:25I'm wondering...
45:25You are physically...
45:26No, you said there's no physical...
45:28You said on the physical front.
45:31No, I didn't.
45:32Oh, watch it back.
45:34Yeah, watch it back,
45:35and also watch your back.
45:37Janet Street Porter's coming for you, mate.
45:39Anyway, nice seeing you.
45:41Right.
45:42Nice seeing you.
45:43Now, fuck off.
45:45It's how they should start off
45:46on all episodes of Loose Women.
45:48Tomorrow night.
45:49Dating and masturbating.
45:51And new celebrity.
45:52I feel like I'm good-looking enough not to lie.
45:54PK Humble arrives.
45:56You know what should I add to my dating roster?
45:58How many people are on this roster?
46:00Probably, like, 20 plus.
46:01So why the hell do you need our help?
46:03As our celebs...
46:04Ball bag.
46:05Ball bag?
46:06Ball bag.
46:07Girl!
46:08Look, I can pick up a singular new dog.
46:10And then he went with your sister.
46:12What?
46:13Dating!
46:14If I saw you at the bar,
46:16I'd buy you a champagne.
46:17I said I would have been...
46:19Eww!
46:19Eww!
46:20Eww!
46:20Eww!
46:21Eww!
46:23Eww!
46:32Eww!
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