- 10 minutes ago
The Bear - Season 5 Episode 100 - (special) Gary
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01:06Oh, my God.
01:09Let's fucking go.
01:11Yeah.
01:12Do this.
01:13Okay, you better be home by 5.15.
01:19No problemo, babe.
01:20No problemo, babe.
01:25Yo, stop, stop.
01:27You're gonna wake up the whole fucking neighborhood.
01:29Be fucking on time.
01:30Shit, I forgot.
01:31Are you fucking kidding me?
01:31Yeah, I'm sorry.
01:32You gotta give me a sec.
01:34Motherfucker, damn it.
01:36Fucking.
01:37Oh, yeah.
01:38There it is.
01:39There it is.
01:40You get in the fucking car.
01:42Tell me to go in that car.
01:43Get in the fucking car.
01:44Get in the car.
01:49Let's go.
01:50There's just nothing loud yet, all right?
01:53Just...
01:53Why are you slamming that for me?
01:55Why do you have to...
01:55Just fucking shut it.
01:57You slam it?
01:58Don't say you didn't when you did.
01:59Michael, I did this.
02:01You guys show me again?
02:02Yeah.
02:03Exactly.
02:08I hated that.
02:10How terrible is that fucking filth?
02:12You got it from fucking Go-Go's.
02:14That is pretty good.
02:14What is it?
02:15Hazelette?
02:15You know they're debit only now?
02:17What if you don't have a debit card, right?
02:19Then you're fucked if you don't have a debit card.
02:20You got the debit card.
02:21You gotta pay a fucking fee.
02:22It's like they fuck you in the ass either way.
02:24Yeah, because if they do the credit card,
02:25then they gotta pay a percentage of the credit card.
02:28I understand, but why fuck the customer?
02:29It's just for no reason.
02:34I gotta tell you, Mike,
02:35it's kind of like a little bit of a glass half-empty kind of
02:39energy you're working with for this mission.
02:41Double-O fucking suck my dick?
02:42What do you mean a mission?
02:43Yo, we're fucking transporting some goods across state lines.
02:45I'm taking a fucking tape box to Gary, Indiana.
02:48Gary fucking Indiana.
02:49That's where we're going.
02:50What's in the box?
02:51I don't know what's in the fucking box.
02:52It's taped.
02:53I just said it's taped.
02:54You can tell me.
02:58All right.
02:59Fair enough.
02:59I don't need to know.
03:00You're a fucking donkey.
03:01That's what you fucking are.
03:02That's what you are.
03:03Fucking all.
03:03You don't even know what you're fucking taking.
03:04You're just fucking moving, donkey.
03:06Fucking packing old donkey.
03:08I am a donkey.
03:08Yeah.
03:09You ever see what a donkey's packing downstairs?
03:12You ever see that donkey downstairs?
03:18What's happening?
03:19We're still here.
03:20Is that Jimmy?
03:21Me?
03:23Mate.
04:00What are you doing?
04:01Good.
04:02Didn't I say stay in the car?
04:04What?
04:04Man, I said stay in the car.
04:05Why can't you just stay in the fucking car?
04:07You didn't say stay in the car.
04:08You didn't hear me say stay in the car?
04:10You didn't say it.
04:11I didn't hear you say it because you didn't say it.
04:12It's too much, Rich.
04:14Fucking dog.
04:15Huh?
04:16I'm not a fucking dog.
04:17You can't fucking tell me where to go and when to do it.
04:21Yo, look what I made last night.
04:26You made a fucking...
04:28Did you make that?
04:29Yeah, I made this.
04:30Tunes for Gary.
04:32Come on, baby.
04:33Let's do this.
04:35Oh!
04:36Oh!
04:37Oh!
04:37Oh!
04:39I am gradual with the volume.
04:41Just turn it off.
04:42This is gradual with the volume.
04:43That's exactly what I did.
04:44I swear to God.
04:45Stop it.
04:46Stop it.
04:47Pull this fucking car over and fucking leave you here.
04:49You understand?
04:49This is not...
04:50This is not gradual with the speaker.
04:53Like that.
04:55That's not what I did.
04:56I know how to...
04:57I respect the fucking car.
05:00Now I want you to respect the fucking music.
05:02This is not useless.
05:24Good gracious.
05:29Yeah, there he is.
05:31There he is! There he is!
05:34Stop. Don't fucking touch me. Stop. Stop.
05:39Want to hear some fun facts about Gary?
05:41Can't wait.
05:42Guess the population?
05:4570,000.
05:47Uh, it is a rust belt city.
05:50It was once known as Magic City.
05:53It was once also known as the City of the Century.
05:56City of the Century.
05:5754% female.
05:58For those of us in the car that are, you know, not married, that might be a pretty fun fact.
06:05Obviously, John Cougar, Mellencamp.
06:07Michael Jackson, you fucking orangutan.
06:09Michael Jackson's from Gary.
06:10The whole Jackson 5 for that man.
06:11He could have fucking said Tito before fucking John Cougar and Mellencamp.
06:14Alright.
06:15Oh shit, Coney King does a piece of puff.
06:17What?
06:18Coney King does a piece of puff.
06:19I thought that was just a Chicago thing.
06:23You trying to tell me you're not at all excited about traveling more?
06:26Traveling?
06:26Yeah.
06:27You're not just tired of the same old, same old.
06:29This is what I'm talking about, Michael.
06:31This is a fucking mission.
06:32Jimmy's entrusting us with some more responsibility.
06:34We've got the fucking open road ahead of us.
06:36You know, there's a lot of, you know, positive things about this day.
06:40Responsibility, huh?
06:41Yeah.
06:42Yeah.
06:42Feeling respected?
06:44Yeah.
06:45Yeah.
06:46I think the time you'll come to find that this is a, maybe a potentially transformative
06:50day.
06:51Come on.
06:53We're on a great day.
06:54Bop down to Gary.
06:56Little bada bing, bada boom.
06:57Bop, bap, bap.
06:58We're fucking home by 5.15.
07:00The latest.
07:015.15, why 5.15?
07:03It's just the thing with Tiff that she's got superstition about.
07:05Superstition about what?
07:06Her mom went into labor at 5.15 and she got it in her head that she's gonna, you know,
07:11the same thing's gonna happen to her.
07:12It's the stupidest fucking thing I've ever heard in my life.
07:14I can't.
07:14Why would the same thing?
07:15I know.
07:16Literally, how many minutes are in a fucking day?
07:17There's like thousands of fucking minutes in a day.
07:19Why would it happen in the same time?
07:20Michael, I'm not saying that this makes any kind of sense at all.
07:22So we need to be back by 5.15 because her fucking mother spit her out?
07:25It's a non, it's a non-issue.
07:26It's a non-issue.
07:27It's a non-issue.
07:28Well, it is a fucking issue if you're saying we gotta be back by 5.15.
07:31We'll be back by 5.15.
07:32That's why I'm saying it's a non-issue.
07:37You'd rather be at the fucking serving beefs all day?
07:41Like an open road.
07:45Where's my Kansas City, baby?
07:48And I'm a Kansas City one.
07:53Well, I might take the train.
07:56I might take the plane.
07:58But if I have to walk, I'm going just the same.
08:01Going to Kansas City.
08:04Kansas City, here I come.
08:09They got some crazy little women there.
08:13And I'm gonna give me one.
08:15Welcome to Indiana.
08:17There you go.
08:17You're a fucking world traveler, Rich. Congratulations.
08:20Let's go.
08:21Yeah, you feel different?
08:25Ah, yeah!
08:36City of magic.
08:38City of the century.
08:41You think this happened overnight?
08:43Oh, yeah.
08:43They just flipped a switch.
08:45They just went...
08:46Flipped a switch.
08:51Definitely don't feel like Chicago.
08:53And the same thing.
08:55And the same thing here I come.
08:57Ha, ha, ha.
08:59It's about 35 minutes away.
09:01Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
09:03I don't know what to say.
09:05She'll change quick.
09:08They got some crazy little women there, and I'm gonna give me one.
09:16They got some crazy little women there, and I'm gonna give me one.
09:27Call it, Jimmy.
09:32Just...
09:43Hey, hi, hon. Hey.
09:45How you feeling?
09:47Uh, um, you know, I think I'm good.
09:51What do you mean?
09:52I don't know. I'm not sure how to describe it.
09:55It's just like, it's like...
09:56What?
09:57It's like, I feel like I have to shit really bad,
09:59but I don't know.
10:00I can't tell if this is what the doctor said to look out for.
10:03Okay.
10:05Uh...
10:05Contraction?
10:06You think it's like Braxton Hicks?
10:09Uh, yeah, probably.
10:11But, you know, I'll be okay.
10:12It's not close to 515 yet, so...
10:14Yeah?
10:14Yeah, don't worry. I'm okay.
10:16Okay.
10:16Did you do the drop-off?
10:18Uh, almost.
10:19Uh-huh.
10:20Well, I'm proud of you. I'm really proud of you.
10:21How's the drive? Are you having fun?
10:23Yeah. Yeah, we're having a good time.
10:26And how about Mikey? Is he okay?
10:28Yeah, he's good.
10:29Okay, that's great.
10:30But don't smoke any cigarettes, though, honey. Promise me, right?
10:33Okay.
10:33Listen, I'm gonna call you back, okay?
10:35Just try me if you need anything, okay?
10:36I love you.
10:37Okay, I love you so much.
10:39What's up? What'd he say?
10:41He said he'd let us know in a few hours.
10:45Let us know.
10:47What's up for you?
10:49Like, three? Four?
10:50Richie, I didn't say it. He said...
10:53He had hours to killing Gary. You still feeling respected?
10:57Fuck it. It's just...
10:59I don't know. Let's get something to eat.
11:02You see that?
11:03It's Michael Jackson's house.
11:06Huh.
11:06Yeah.
11:08Shimmo!
11:18Lock the door.
11:20Reach in there.
11:24What are these names? Teddy Pendergrass?
11:26Yes, we are.
11:28Oh, a little TP.
11:29Yes, I love Teddy.
11:30The romantic hot dog place you got here.
11:33Oh.
11:36I listen to the old school music.
11:38Yeah.
11:38I'm right there with you.
11:39Yeah.
11:40And you know what they're saying.
11:41Yeah.
11:42Yeah.
11:44Hi, welcome to Clowning King.
11:46Appreciate you.
11:46Yo, Mike, this is Alicia.
11:47How are you, Alicia?
11:48Nice to meet you.
11:49Mike, how are you?
11:50I'll be your server. Just let me know if you need anything.
11:52Appreciate it.
11:53I got you eliminated.
11:57Welcome.
11:59You're missing out.
12:00You're missing out, huh?
12:01Yeah.
12:02Yeah.
12:03How long you worked here?
12:04I've been working here five years.
12:06Five years?
12:06Yeah.
12:07Yeah.
12:07It's business pretty good.
12:08It's great.
12:09I love it.
12:10You love it?
12:10What do you love about it?
12:11I like working with people for public.
12:14That's the answer right there.
12:15Michael hates people.
12:16Oh, man.
12:18I believe what he says.
12:19I don't like crowds.
12:20I don't hate people, but I just don't like crowds.
12:23You cook at home?
12:25You like the truth?
12:26Yeah, only the truth.
12:27No.
12:28Yeah.
12:28When I leave here, I don't want to go stand in front of a stove with you.
12:32That's it, huh?
12:32Y'all cook at home?
12:34A little bit.
12:35Sometimes I write out some pots and pans, but I don't know.
12:37Not too much.
12:38I don't really cook at the restaurant, though, so.
12:40What kind of restaurant?
12:41Similar to this.
12:42Okay.
12:42Do the cook?
12:44I do some cooking from time to time.
12:46Yeah.
12:46What do you do?
12:47What do I do at the restaurant?
12:49Yeah.
12:50Yeah, what do you do?
12:51Uh, I guess I'm a bit like, uh, I don't know how you say it, like, like, kind of a
12:54bit of a song and dance, man.
12:56There you go.
12:56There you go.
12:57I don't know, public relations, forward-facing, you know.
13:08Cousin, what do you think of the name Annie?
13:13Cousin.
13:15Throw some names at me you like.
13:20Hit me.
13:23Call me crazy, but I actually like the name Althea.
13:26Althea?
13:27Althea.
13:28Althea sounds like the name of, like, somebody that's getting their ass kicked off.
13:31Nah.
13:32Althea?
13:32Althea's strong.
13:36Sounds like a nerd.
13:37Man, Althea.
13:39I'll see ya.
13:42I'll see ya later.
13:46I'll see ya around noon.
13:48I'll see ya.
13:49I'll see ya when I get back from, uh, from social studies.
13:54I'll see ya for dinner.
13:58I'll see ya when I see ya.
14:14I met this, uh, this Eva that I liked once.
14:18Eva.
14:34Oh, look at these little fuckers.
14:36Oh, these little fuckers are about to get it.
14:40What's up, girls?
14:40Oh, we're gonna fucking-
14:42Okay.
14:43Yeah, sure.
14:44All right, you little fuckers.
14:47You ready to get some?
14:48That's my second favorite sport right here.
14:52Hey, we got Knicks.
14:55Hey, what's your score of that game right there?
14:58Well, you guys hooping and you picking daisies.
15:00Let me and my boy get one of you, we run threes.
15:03Which one?
15:03All right, come on, Daffodil.
15:05You ready to win?
15:06Yeah?
15:07Come here, young buck.
15:07What's going on?
15:08I'm Mikey.
15:09What's up, buddy?
15:10How are you?
15:11Oh, we gonna have balls like that?
15:12Y'all want five points?
15:13What's up, Mikey?
15:14What's up?
15:14All right, let's run.
15:15I don't even need to warm up.
15:17All right, boys.
15:18Come on, Rich.
15:18Let's go.
15:19Oh, shit.
15:20It's time for a little silken Swede.
15:23Y'all about to get some?
15:24You sure you don't need to stretch?
15:25I don't need to stretch.
15:26I'm about to stretch you, boy.
15:27Hold on.
15:27Let's wait for him.
15:28You ready?
15:28Yeah.
15:29Hey, good luck, youngsters.
15:31Let's go.
15:31Hold on.
15:33Come on.
15:34Come on.
15:35Come on.
15:37I don't know.
15:37I'm sorry.
15:38Where were you?
15:39All right, play, play, play.
15:40I got things.
15:40Go out there.
15:41Stay with him.
15:42Stay in front.
15:42Oh, okay.
15:44Oh.
15:45Haha.
15:45That's gonna hurt.
15:47Let's go.
15:47Yeah.
15:48It's man game now.
15:49It's different.
15:50Let's go.
15:50Haha.
15:52You know it's the orange circle, right?
15:55It's the orange circle.
15:56You want to try to get it in that orange circle.
15:59Everyone's afraid of contact out here.
16:00Go to the basket.
16:02That ain't happening.
16:03Don't be afraid.
16:04Come on.
16:04It was.
16:07Good for you.
16:08Mike.
16:08Every dog has his day.
16:09All right.
16:10Bring it down there again.
16:11It's because I'm covering three guys, Rich.
16:13Let's go.
16:13Play ball.
16:14Haha.
16:16Oh, yeah.
16:19It's every time he's beating you in the back fucking door.
16:22Yo.
16:23Keep the fucking door shut.
16:24Do not let him, do not let him get behind you.
16:26It's, it's a motherfucker.
16:28All right, let's go.
16:29Nice play.
16:30Oh.
16:30Where you going?
16:32Yeah.
16:33That's what I'm talking about.
16:34Hey, you got it.
16:35It's one.
16:35That's one.
16:36Let's go.
16:37Hey, come on.
16:38Yup.
16:39Hit one down for you.
16:41That's a good shot, boy.
16:42Banks fucking open.
16:43All day long.
16:44You see it?
16:44Hey, hey, hey.
16:46It's a shot that fucking counts, right?
16:48Let's go.
16:48Play defense, hot shot.
16:51Hands up.
16:53Let's go.
16:55You all right?
16:56Hey, roll up.
16:57You all right?
16:58You all right?
16:58You all right?
16:59Let's go.
16:59Play ball.
17:00Check up.
17:00Check up.
17:01He's crying.
17:02I tell you what, they breed him soft out here in Indiana.
17:05Huh?
17:05It ain't the eighties.
17:06It ain't the eighties.
17:08It ain't the eighties.
17:09Let's go.
17:10Yeah, I don't like your eyes.
17:10Did you change your diaper before the game?
17:12Like, do you, or do you just play?
17:13What do you got?
17:14A swimmer on?
17:15You play with a swimmer on?
17:17Let's go.
17:18Next basket wins.
17:19No.
17:19Set a bone.
17:20Yes, sir.
17:21Yes, sir.
17:23Yes, baby.
17:24Yes, baby.
17:24Let's fucking go.
17:25You see that screen?
17:26Yes.
17:26I'm a fucking lion.
17:27I love it.
17:28I love you, boy.
17:29All day.
17:30Hey, good shit.
17:31Good shit, youngsters.
17:32Good shit.
17:33Look at that.
17:33Look at what he's doing.
17:35Hey, young buck, you're not so bad.
17:37You just miss a back.
17:37How do you miss a back door there?
17:39You see the back of his head?
17:40You got a cut to the back.
17:41And you're not passing the ball.
17:42Exactly.
17:42And that's what I've been trying to tell you.
17:43You guys are fucking garbage.
17:45The Indiana guys are fucking garbage.
17:47Hey, shut your old bitch ass up.
17:49Oh.
17:49You're negative.
17:51You're negative.
17:52You know what, actually?
17:53Don't get...
17:53No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
17:56It's all right.
17:56Let him play.
17:56Let him play.
17:57We love you.
17:58We love you.
17:58Yo, your fucking Nikes look like fucking moccasins.
18:07Fellas, let's be real.
18:08Gary in the end.
18:18Hey, you got tall boys?
18:20No tall boys.
18:22Just regular boys, like you.
18:28What do we got here?
18:30Hey, yo, yo, yo.
18:30Why are you creeping?
18:35Come on, give me some of that O.E.
18:37Don't focus some of that.
18:40Drink your beer and get out.
18:41Okay, okay.
18:42Don't drink beer in store.
18:44Yo.
18:45I feel sorry for your mother.
18:46No!
18:47Come on.
18:48What'd you say about my mama?
18:50Sorry about my friend.
18:54Two, please.
18:56Let me get a scratch card.
18:59Crescent kick is a defensive maneuver.
19:01That's just, you know, clearing space.
19:03Just a fucking...
19:04Snap kick is for speed.
19:07Don't even see that fucker coming.
19:09But then if you need power, then you know,
19:11it's just fucking side kick.
19:12Bah!
19:12All day.
19:13Break a fucker's knee, right?
19:14Bah!
19:15That's it.
19:16Let's help that shit.
19:17Want me to tell you what the move is, though?
19:18Yeah.
19:19Look, dude.
19:19I don't want to fight you at all.
19:20I'm just going home.
19:21That's it.
19:22Fucking back kick.
19:24Right?
19:25Back kick.
19:26I was getting there.
19:26Fucking power's out.
19:27Ding dong, motherfucker.
19:31Oh, be careful there.
19:32Be careful.
19:32Don't get it on the list.
19:33Hey, I'm so sorry about...
19:34Boom!
19:35Fuck out!
19:36And it's like so many...
19:37It's like a fucking mule.
19:38Like, think about a mule like that.
19:39It's these big...
19:40You're actually generating force with, like,
19:42the big fucking muscle.
19:43Whoa!
19:44You know what I'm saying?
19:45Yeah.
19:45It's because you're already going this direction,
19:47then you come in that direction.
19:48Yeah.
19:48Yeah, just even, like, the sight of it.
19:50You know what I mean?
19:50Yeah.
19:51Fuck yeah.
20:02Why are we starving?
20:06Christmas custom.
20:11Woohoo!
20:39Yes sir, yes sir, you're fucking unbelievable.
20:49You got fucking magic power, dawg.
21:00Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
21:07Oh, yes sir, just for you.
21:21Ah, ah, super.
21:24Super.
21:25Will you love her by your side?
21:27Then you know you're gonna have a lot of pleasure.
21:29Don't you worry about a thing if you start to dance and sing
21:33and she'll come up on you.
21:35Yo.
21:36And when that rhythm finally hit you and the beat that you do,
21:40you see that sign?
21:42Huh?
21:42Cousin, you see that sign right over there?
21:44Yeah.
21:49I think...
21:51Did you see it before?
21:53What are you talking about?
21:53I'm saying there's no way.
21:58The two of us are sitting here for over an hour
22:01and neither of us have seen that fuckin' sign right there.
22:06Yeah, Rich, it's a fuckin' sign.
22:09I think that bar just appeared.
22:11What the fuck?
22:11Yo, for real?
22:12Shut the fuck up.
22:13For real though?
22:14I think that bar just fuckin' appeared.
22:16Michael.
22:17Okay, the bar just fuckin' appeared, Rich.
22:19You don't think that's crazy?
22:21It's a fuckin' bar.
22:23It's a sign.
22:26It's a sign.
22:27It's a sign.
22:27Open.
22:28That sign's a sign.
22:31That sign is a sign.
22:33We're goin' in there.
22:51Just sit the fuck down.
22:56I hate that.
22:58Don't hit the fuck.
22:59What are you doin'?
23:00What are you doin'?
23:00What are you doin'?
23:04Hey, Richie, get in the fuckin' car!
23:12Rich!
23:13Sir, can you please step out of the vehicle?
23:16Sir, please, I'm not gonna ask you again.
23:17Please step out of the vehicle.
23:19License and registrate.
23:20Okay, that's it!
23:21Put your vagina where I can see it!
23:23Put your vagina right where I can see it!
23:26There's fuckin' houses!
23:27Stop!
23:27Yo!
23:28Yo, come on!
23:29Wait, come on, we're not goin'!
23:30Yo, come on, let's just go!
23:31I'm not doin' that fuckin' bar!
23:32I'm not doin' that fuckin' bar!
23:33No!
23:33Just a little shot of rhythm and blues, and we come back!
23:35I'm not doin' it!
23:36No!
23:36You fuckin' here!
23:37You fuckin' do a shot of fuckin' cocaine!
23:40You think you can fight a fuckin' tiger?
23:42Come on!
23:43Stop!
23:44It's fuckin' terrible!
23:45What's terrible?
23:46I'm, like, genuinely inspired here, and you're just shittin' all over my fuckin' dreams!
23:51It's terrible!
23:52I hope you feel good about yourself right now!
23:55Why are you pressuring me?
23:56Come on!
23:58Alright, fuck you!
24:00I'm goin' in!
24:01You're goin' in?
24:02I'm goin' in!
24:04Oh, shh!
24:06Yo!
24:07I'm good?
24:08How do I look?
24:09You look like a fuckin' barbarian, dude!
24:11You look like my father!
24:13Alright, I'm goin' in!
24:14Yo!
24:16Punk, if you need me to!
24:18Yeah!
24:19Alright!
24:21You'll fuckin' see!
24:23You'll fuckin' see!
24:26You're gonna remember this fuckin' day!
24:42That's a fuckin' sign!
24:43Alright!
24:50We've gotta go, boys!
24:52We've gottaلي!
24:55Wait!
24:58Wait!
24:59Wait!
25:00Wait!
25:02Wait!
25:34I used to be a stick-up kid, so I think of all the devious things I did.
25:38I used to roll up, cause there's a hole up.
25:40Ain't nothing funny, stop smiling, still don't nothing move but the money.
25:43But now I've learned to earn cause I'm righteous.
25:46I feel great, so maybe I might just search for a nine to five.
25:50Hey.
25:51Hey.
25:53You Mike?
25:56Yeah.
25:59Is it true?
26:01What's that?
26:02You're one of the goalies for the Blackhawks?
26:09Yeah?
26:10An e-bug?
26:13That's right.
26:16What is that?
26:17What's an e-bug?
26:19It's an emergency backup goalie.
26:23Yeah.
26:24I, like, never play, but I'm with the squad.
26:27That's cool.
26:28Mm.
26:29That's cool.
26:33Yeah, your buddy told us about you.
26:36Yeah.
26:37I bet he did.
26:39He also said, um, tell you to put your big boy pants on.
26:45And join us in the bar.
26:48Sounds about right.
26:50Oh, boy.
26:51Just a messenger.
26:52I got it.
26:53Okay.
26:53It's pretty fun, though.
26:54Okay.
26:55I think you'll like it.
26:55Okay.
26:56Here we come.
27:14Okay, okay, okay, okay.
27:16So, I, one time, after a night out, uh, I got a ride home, but they took me to the
27:22wrong
27:22house, and I was too embarrassed to tell them that I knocked on the door of the house and,
27:28and convinced them to let me just come inside for a little bit.
27:32It's a fact.
27:33It's a fact.
27:34It's a fact.
27:35It's a fact.
27:36It's a fact.
27:36It's a fact.
27:39It's a fact.
27:51You guys are fucking good.
27:52All right.
27:53Can I take another crack at this?
27:55All right.
27:56Okay.
27:57Um, my senior year, uh, I was doing pretty well in school, but with fucking maths, I'm with
28:04my fucking lambium, you know?
28:06So, my grandma, yo, you see this?
28:10Fucking great.
28:13Um, so, my grandma, she gave me an ultimatum.
28:17She was like, you gotta get a math tutor.
28:19And so, she told me about this lady, Roxolano, who sang in her church choir, who, she was,
28:25like, uh, a math professor for Cooks County Community.
28:30And I was like, no fucking way, grandma.
28:32I don't want to fucking do this.
28:33I don't want to do the math tutor with some fucking 90-year-old, like, you know, fucking
28:37babushka.
28:37Like, yeah, you know what I'm saying?
28:39Like, so, but she was like, listen, you gotta do it or you gotta move out.
28:43So, come Thursday, 7.30, I'm at this dude's house, eating his fucking mom's golden lasagne,
28:50you know?
28:51Okay.
28:51And I realized, like, I gotta be at, uh, at Roxolana's, this Tudor's, you know, in, like,
28:57five minutes.
28:57So, I fucking down my cranberry juice, and I fucking sprint over there, bah, bah, bah,
29:02bah, bah, bah, bah, bah, knock on the door.
29:04And this fucking woman that opens the door, I swear to God, like, straight out of Sports
29:09Illustrated fucking swimsuit issue.
29:12This is the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen up to this point.
29:16Jet black hair, long, all the way down, just kissing kind of the top of her butt, you know?
29:21And we get in, what, what, what, what, what?
29:25You guys willing to factor fix me yet, or you wanna hear more of the story?
29:29You wanna hear the story?
29:30Yeah, you wanna hear the story, okay.
29:32All right, so we get in there, we're talking math, and all of a sudden, I feel my entire
29:38insides just turn to liquid.
29:41And I gotta take a shit, like, bad.
29:44But I know that she got one little bathroom right there, this tiny thing, and I know if
29:48I go in there, she's gonna hear everything, you know?
29:52And I'm just like, I mean, on the outside, I'm cool as a cucumber, you know, we're talking
29:57math, and on the inside, I'm just like, come on, asshole, don't you fucking fail me now,
30:01baby.
30:02And somehow, by the grace of God, I make it through this fucking tutor session, right?
30:09That's not helpful.
30:12So, Roxanne, a pleasure to meet you, I'll see you next Thursday, you know, blah, blah,
30:15blah.
30:16I get outside, and I'm like, yes, I'm gonna fucking make it.
30:19I start to walk, quickly back up, back down, and it just comes out, that's it.
30:25And it's just like, that's what's happening, and I'm just, I start to pull my drawers down,
30:31my pants down.
30:32I look like one of those photographs of the guys that just discovered oil, you know,
30:36like, stuff is gurgling, I can't tell what's coming up.
30:39And it's just like, so mud, and shit, and everywhere, and it's, I'm like, I have this
30:47incredible feeling of relief, right?
30:49Until I see her little porch light come on, and time slows down, and I see her doorknob
30:55turn, and open, and I look at her, and she looks at me very quickly, and then she quickly
31:01looks away, and I just fucking take off through the hedges, and I'm just fucking running.
31:09I'm just heading right back to Michael's house, and I'm covered with brambles, and my balls
31:13are slapping on either side, and I just got, like, a trail behind me, and I just can't
31:19stop laughing, and I'm crying with laughter, because I know in six blocks down fucking
31:23Milwaukee, I'm gonna be at this dude's house, and I'm gonna tell him this story, and this
31:27motherfucker is gonna love it.
31:29Factor fiction!
31:34Sadly, sadly, it is a bad.
31:36Sadly, it is a fucking bad movie.
31:43I'm alright, I'm alright, this is what's on me, I subject you guys to it.
31:47Alright, hold on, I'll be right back, I'll be right back.
32:00You know I know, right?
32:02Yes.
32:04Huh.
32:07You know I know, you're not a goalie for the next one.
32:10Ah, yes.
32:12That's total bullshit.
32:14Yeah.
32:14Mm-hmm.
32:19What gave you away?
32:24Something in your eyes.
32:25Yeah.
32:26Fair.
32:27Fair.
32:30You prefer Mike?
32:32Mikey?
32:32Michael?
32:34It's gotta be your call.
32:37Yeah.
32:38No preference.
32:40Preference?
32:40Up to the customer.
32:42Mm-hmm.
32:44How about you?
32:45What's your name?
32:46Can you tell me?
32:48Guess.
32:49Guess?
32:51Oh man, I definitely...
32:54Bridget, I don't know.
32:55What?
32:57Oh boy.
32:58Shonda.
32:59Shit.
32:59Shit.
33:00Shit.
33:01Shit.
33:01Fuck, I don't know.
33:01Sherry.
33:02Sherry, okay.
33:04Sherry from Gary.
33:05Oh hey, that's the first I've ever heard that before.
33:08Hey.
33:13You don't wanna play the game, huh?
33:15Yeah.
33:17I don't know if that one's for me.
33:19I mean, you...
33:21You wanna go?
33:23It's...
33:24Sure, I'll go.
33:25Yeah?
33:26Yeah.
33:28Yeah.
33:28Fact or fiction?
33:30Michael?
33:32Okay.
33:33Uh...
33:35Ask me a question.
33:37You from here?
33:39No.
33:40No.
33:41No.
33:42No.
33:44No.
33:45I am not from Indiana.
33:48Okay.
33:49I am from Portland.
33:51Maine, not Oregon.
33:53Okay.
33:56What are you doing here?
33:59Needed to start over.
34:01Okay.
34:01Needed to get away from someone, something.
34:05Got in my 88 Honda Accord and started driving west, and my car broke down not too far from here.
34:11My mom's favorite movie was Love in the Afternoon, starring Gary Cooper.
34:17She always said she would have named me Gary if I was a boy, so I saw the sign and
34:20I was like,
34:22alright, ma.
34:24Stayed one night, it was quiet.
34:28I like a ghost town, you know what I mean?
34:29Mm-hmm.
34:32Capstan.
34:33Mm-hmm.
34:34Work at this jazz joint, jazz joint down on Broadway called Dirties.
34:39Dirties?
34:39Yeah, I worked at the bar.
34:40You like it?
34:41It's great.
34:42Why?
34:45Come on, what's not to like about a diving jazz and blues joint in Gary and Deanna?
34:55Uh, let's see.
34:57That is a fact.
35:01Fiction.
35:02No, really?
35:03Yeah.
35:03Fuck.
35:05Fuck.
35:07That Gary Cooper shit, that was suspect as a motherfucker.
35:10No, that's real.
35:10No, that's real.
35:11No, it's not.
35:11Well, fuck.
35:14Tiff, it's me.
35:15It's Richie.
35:16Wait a minute.
35:17I can barely hear you.
35:18Tiff, it's me.
35:19Richard.
35:20No, that's real.
35:21Where are you?
35:22I'm in fucking Gary.
35:24It's so loud there.
35:25It's going so good.
35:26You sound like you're in a bar.
35:28Are you in a bar?
35:29We're in a bar.
35:30Why are you in a bar?
35:32Because the clients.
35:34Why are you in a bar?
35:36The clients from Jimmy.
35:38Tiff, it's going so fucking good.
35:40Look at me.
35:41Mikey's so smooth.
35:42He's so fucking smooth.
35:44I can't really.
35:44Mikey is so smooth.
35:46Okay.
35:47We're having such a good time.
35:48Okay.
35:49Can you hear me?
35:50Because I'm here.
35:51Please do.
35:52Hello?
35:53How are you feeling?
35:56Do it again?
35:58Yeah?
35:59Alright.
36:00I was born and raised right the fuck here in Gary, Indiana.
36:02I lived here my whole life.
36:03I loved to travel.
36:05Gone everywhere.
36:06But I lived here my whole life.
36:08I love trains.
36:09Do not put me on a boat.
36:12Let's see.
36:12I got two older sisters.
36:14They got a different dad who I thought was Santa Claus when I was 11 years old.
36:18I'm not shitting about that one.
36:21I had ovarian cancer when I was 22.
36:24Yeah.
36:26My mom is okay.
36:27My dad is not.
36:31We have a three-legged dog named Lucky.
36:34He's a cool student dad.
36:37And I studied to be an arborist.
36:40An arborist?
36:40Yeah.
36:42You like trees.
36:43I do.
36:44You do?
36:44Why?
36:44What do you like trees?
36:48They're quiet.
36:49Sturdy.
36:49Reliable.
36:50They're always there when you need them.
36:51Yeah.
36:53And they're pretty.
36:58That's a fucking fact.
37:02Maybe.
37:05Maybe.
37:05It's a fact.
37:07Maybe, maybe not.
37:09What makes you say it's a fact?
37:11You just...
37:12I don't know.
37:13You're just speaking from your heart.
37:15Right?
37:22What are you looking for, Michael?
37:33Anything?
37:33Anything?
37:46Here you are, Sarah.
37:56You just called me Sarah.
38:00Tell me why.
38:01Tell me why.
38:04You're what he fucking calls me.
38:07Okay, so...
38:08It's 317 right now.
38:10I got enough time to be home by 515, right?
38:13Yeah.
38:17Oh, if the train isn't running.
38:20What happens with the train?
38:21You'll get caught behind.
38:23It is...
38:25Jason Jones.
38:26Oh.
38:27You'll...
38:28Okay.
38:28Alright, thanks.
38:30Did you leave yourself a buffer?
38:32That's the kind of whole operation, you know?
38:34Wow.
38:34So you like work for him?
38:36Yeah.
38:37I mean, I'm...
38:38I'm self-employed, you know?
38:40Yeah.
38:41Yeah.
38:41So you're the boss.
38:44Yeah, I guess.
38:45I'm the boss.
38:46And a lot of people depend on you, huh?
38:49I depend on a lot of people.
38:53I bet you're a good leader.
38:57Mm-hmm.
39:01People like...
39:04Like people say things about me.
39:07Then what do they say?
39:10They say that I don't finish things.
39:16Fact or fiction, Michael?
39:22You mind if I do a poem?
39:25I know you're gonna be you.
39:30Yes.
39:31That's...
39:32That's the coolest thing you've ever heard.
39:37Do you plan to be there for you?
39:39Yeah, yeah.
39:40No, I'm gonna be back.
39:40We're just down here, one, two, wrapping up some business, and then I'll be back up there.
39:45Put my catcher's mitt on.
39:46Ready to fucking go.
39:48Yeah, yeah.
39:49Yeah, yeah.
39:50I can't tell you that.
39:51You're like a birthday witch.
39:52No, no, no.
39:52I would tell you, but my wife's got all...
39:55She's all superstitious about a lot of this stuff, and she was like, she wouldn't want
39:58me to care.
39:58Consider that stuff.
39:59We're having a girl.
40:00I can't tell you we're having a girl.
40:02Yeah, yeah.
40:06You...
40:07I'm okay.
40:08No.
40:14There was this, um...
40:18When I was a kid, you know?
40:20Yeah.
40:20My mom, she used to do this thing where, like, when she was, like, on, like, the perfect
40:25mixture of, like, all kinds of fucking things in her system, you know?
40:28Just, like, perfect.
40:29She'd, like, come into my room in the middle of the night, you know?
40:32And she'd, like, scratch my bag, and she had, like, the longest nails, and she just...
40:36You know?
40:36And she used to...
40:37She used to walk me through my day, you know?
40:39Like...
40:40And, like, the most fucking minute details, you know?
40:42Like, like, describing every little fucking bit of fabric of the fucking day, you know?
40:46Like, what we were gonna eat when we were gonna wake up, what I was gonna wear,
40:48what was gonna be on the radio, like, every fucking thing, you know?
40:51And just, like...
40:53It would make me feel, like...
40:55I don't know, like, it would just make me feel so relaxed.
40:57Yeah, yeah, yeah.
41:00And, like, no matter what was gonna happen that day, it didn't matter, like, fucking test
41:03or some shit bag I had to fucking deal with.
41:05Like, I knew that, and she had planned it for me.
41:08It was great.
41:08And I remember there was just one time, I was like,
41:11Hey, Ma...
41:13Hey, Ma, will you come in and tell me about my day tomorrow?
41:15And she was like...
41:17She, like, got angry, you know?
41:18And she was like...
41:19She was like, Mike, you...
41:21The fucking difference does it make?
41:22It's just a day.
41:26Like...
41:28I did...
41:28I just didn't understand how that could be, like...
41:32Like, how that could be the same person, you know?
41:34Yeah.
41:36That's... that's so scary.
41:38Yeah.
41:42Yeah, she shouldn't have done that.
41:45I think she tried her best.
41:47Can I sit with you?
41:50Yeah, I wish you would.
41:55Come on in, the water's fine.
41:56Oh, boy.
41:59His first impulse was the fucking movie.
42:02You know what I'm saying?
42:03You know what I'm saying?
42:04The one without the narration?
42:06Yeah.
42:06That's the one.
42:07Okay.
42:07Okay?
42:09I gotta call my uncle.
42:10Call him!
42:11Call him!
42:12Let's all...
42:12Everyone call their uncle.
42:14Jimmy, it's Rich.
42:15Where the fuck are you?
42:17Uh...
42:18Call me back.
42:20It's just like...
42:23You know, this way of seeing the world, you know?
42:25Like, this perspective, you know?
42:26This lens that I've always had.
42:27Like, these things that just bother people
42:29and hurt people
42:30and make them frustrated or furious, you know?
42:33Like, to me, it just...
42:35I never got it.
42:36Like, it didn't affect me like that.
42:37It doesn't matter.
42:37No, it doesn't fucking matter.
42:39Nothing fucking matters.
42:40Nothing fucking matters.
42:41Nothing fucking matters.
42:42And I get that, right?
42:43Yeah.
42:43It's meaningless, so why...
42:46And then...
42:46When I'd go on that trip,
42:48like, I could catch this groove, you know?
42:49Sometimes for, like, weeks at a time, you know?
42:51Like, sometimes for months,
42:52and I just, like, have this, like, bliss, you know?
42:55Mm-hmm.
42:56And yeah, I know I'm, like...
42:57Like...
42:58I'm, like, all fucking, like, babbling and shit,
43:00like, here in a fucking bathroom,
43:01like a fucking baby,
43:02but I could be...
43:03Like, I could be a fucking blast.
43:05I can be a blast.
43:05Like, I can share it, you know?
43:07And then...
43:08All of a sudden, like, out of nowhere,
43:09those same thoughts,
43:10like, this kind of meaninglessness of it all,
43:13you know?
43:14I...
43:16It, like, makes me sad.
43:17Yeah.
43:19Nothing matters, it sets you free,
43:20but then where are you, right?
43:22It's the same thing.
43:23You know where.
43:23It's the same thing, you know?
43:24And I'm, like...
43:26Like, so sad.
43:27Like, I'm fucking drowning, you know?
43:28Look!
43:28My jaw feels fucking like a million fucking pounds,
43:30and I...
43:31It's like, I don't wanna...
43:33That sounds exhausting.
43:37You must be really tired.
43:44Get out of here!
43:47Oh my God!
43:54Oh my God!
43:55Bye!
43:57Bye!
44:02Sorry!
44:04Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.
45:04Come on, come on, come on.
45:08Come on, come on, come on, come on.
45:08Okay, I heard you.
45:09Cousin, I'm coming.
45:11Fuck, man.
45:13That's...
45:31Hey, I'll come back.
45:40Okay.
45:42Okay.
45:49Okay.
45:51Okay.
46:01Okay.
46:05Okay.
46:17Okay.
46:21Hey, let's hit it.
46:21Yo, Cousin.
46:22It's a good time.
46:23We gotta go.
46:24You look like fucking Ronald McDonald.
46:26What's going on?
46:26No.
46:29Yo, your phone is dead, huh?
46:31Michael, come on.
46:32What's the name on the phone?
46:32What is it, a capital crime?
46:33What's the problem?
46:34Yo, Cousin, we got this meat in ten.
46:35Where's the fire?
46:36Where's the fire?
46:37We're going, we're going.
46:38Okay.
46:39Okay.
46:40Okay.
46:42Hey, let's hit it.
46:43Yeah.
46:44Yo, we're out of here.
46:46What about my turn?
46:47Good to meet you guys.
46:47Good to meet you guys.
46:48Right?
46:49It's been a pleasure to meet you all.
46:50Wow, wow, wow, wow.
46:50Hang on, hang on.
46:52Hey, we're in America though, right?
46:53Last time I checked, Gary Indiana is in the sovereign United States.
46:57Is it not, Vanessa?
46:58Yeah.
46:58Are we not in America?
46:59Everybody get a turn.
47:00Everybody gets a turn.
47:01All right.
47:01How great are you fucking people?
47:03How great is this fucking...
47:05This fucking place, this spot, this spot's got fucking heart.
47:08That's what I was trying to tell you.
47:09It's magic.
47:10This place is magic.
47:14All right.
47:16You know, we're just a pair of fucking wired and worried travelers and we fucking love it
47:20here.
47:21We thank you.
47:21We thank you, Gary fucking Indiana.
47:23We thank you.
47:25Magic.
47:26Magic.
47:27You know, I just want to take this opportunity because right now, my, uh,
47:32my fine furry cousin right there, my fucking best friend, any second now he's going to
47:39be a dad.
47:39Hey!
47:41Hey!
47:41Hey!
47:43Hey!
47:44Hey!
47:44Hey!
47:44Hey!
47:44Hey!
47:45Hey!
47:47Hey!
47:49Hey!
48:01Hey!
48:10Hey!
48:10Hey!
48:10Hey!
48:11Hey!
48:11He can't fucking wait.
48:13I mean, he's got this pride.
48:19You're glowing, Rich.
48:23You're glowing.
48:24I love you.
48:24It's my fucking boy.
48:25I love you.
48:26I love you.
48:27I love you.
48:27I love you so much.
48:30Look at him.
48:31He's going to be a dad.
48:32Look at him.
48:32Look at him.
48:33That's going to be a father.
48:34That right there is going to be a father, right?
48:37Fucking kid's going to end up abandoned and alone just like he was.
48:41But hey, shit.
48:42Hey, at least you went into it with a good fucking mindset.
48:45Right, kid?
48:45Huh?
48:46I mean, no, no, no, no, no.
48:47It's okay.
48:47No, I love it.
48:48That's the thing.
48:49That's the thing you got to know about Rich, man, is that the one thing that you can absolutely
48:54fucking depend on with this fucking guy is that if he is involved, he's going to fuck
48:59it up.
48:59I mean, he is going to fuck it up.
49:00And everybody knows it.
49:02I mean, nobody says it, right?
49:03Nobody says it.
49:04Because everybody's a fucking coward and a fucking liar.
49:07But this isn't going to be any fucking different.
49:09I mean, he's going to fuck this.
49:10Listen, his entire life is a fucking bed that he took a shit in the middle of and he just
49:14smears it.
49:15And that's what's beautiful.
49:16Look at him.
49:17It's beautiful.
49:18But he's got to fuck this up, too.
49:19Right?
49:20No, no, no, no, no, no.
49:21It's okay.
49:21It's okay.
49:22Everybody knows it.
49:23They don't say it.
49:24But look.
49:24Look.
49:25Ooh.
49:27Ooh.
49:28Look at his eyes.
49:28Look at those beady little fucking eyes.
49:30He knows it, too.
49:31That's the fucking thing.
49:32All right.
49:32He knows it, too.
49:33Well, all right, what?
49:34We got to go.
49:35We got to go.
49:35We got to.
49:36Where are we going?
49:38Where are we fucking going?
49:39Yo, we got this meme.
49:40Yeah, yeah, yeah.
49:40We got it.
49:41You know what you ought to do?
49:42You ought to get in the fucking truck and just start fucking driving.
49:45All right.
49:45Just fucking bolt, right?
49:47Just fucking.
49:47You want to do that kid of yours a favor?
49:49Just fucking bolt.
49:50Just fucking hit the fucking road and do not come back.
49:52You want to do him a favor, right?
49:54Okay.
49:54No, it's fine.
49:55It's fine.
49:55It doesn't matter.
49:56It doesn't matter.
49:57It's the truth.
49:58It's the truth.
49:59What?
49:59You going to be a good father?
50:00Is that what you got to be?
50:02Huh, Ronald McDonald?
50:03Are you going to be a good father?
50:04Are you going to be a good father?
50:06It doesn't matter.
50:07It doesn't matter.
50:08Just say it.
50:08Just say it.
50:09You're going to fuck it up, right?
50:10Come on.
50:10You're not mad.
50:11Don't be mad.
50:12You're not mad.
50:13You're not mad.
50:15Are you mad?
50:16Are you mad?
50:16You're not mad.
50:17You're not mad.
50:18No, just say it.
50:19Stop it.
50:20no no no no stop that he's telling the fucking truth finally he's telling the fucking truth
50:26say again you hate me you hate me rich you gotta fuck this up rich just say that and we'll
50:32go
50:34stop at least you're not lying anymore why are you doing this i love you why are you doing this
50:45i love you you're a coward rich you're a fucking coward i'm a coward you're a coward i'm a coward
51:08i'm a coward kid's gonna hate you rich
51:12kid's gonna
51:16this is
51:18no no no
51:23no no no
51:24no no no no no no no
52:48Hey, one of you Mikey?
52:56This is for Jimmy.
53:10What's in the box?
53:37What's in the box?
53:43What do, uh, what do plastic pump impellers do?
53:49They rotate.
53:59It's your own.
54:02Probably not.
54:05FedEx strikes are over.
54:33I don't know.
55:00I don't know.
55:02I don't know.
55:04I don't know.
55:08I don't know.
55:09I don't know.
55:09I don't know.
55:10I don't know.
55:38I don't know.
55:46I don't know.
55:46I don't know.
55:47I don't know.
55:54I don't know.
55:54I don't know.
55:55I don't know.
55:57I don't know.
55:57I don't know.
55:58I don't know.
56:00I don't know.
56:01I don't know.
56:01I don't know.
56:20I don't know.
56:22I don't know.
56:23I don't know.
56:23I don't know.
57:54How can the wind with its arms all around me
58:03Lost all away
58:05Then after
58:07Dream on
58:11On to the heart of the sunrise
58:18Sharp
58:21Distance
58:23How can the wind with so many around me
58:31Lost in the city
58:55And the wind with so many around me
58:56And the wind with so many around me
58:57And so many around me
58:57You
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