- 14 hours ago
Age of Attraction - Season 1 - Episode 08
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TVTranscript
00:00:13I
00:00:14Excited very excited. I've been waiting for this forever
00:00:25I
00:00:26Haven't really felt like this about anyone. I am 38 years. You know, I
00:00:35Am 22 trying to roll with that whole age is just a number thing
00:00:42I really don't know if you're ready for this one. You ready? I'm 60
00:00:50Oh
00:00:50My gosh
00:00:5230 40 56. Yeah, he's 33 years older than me
00:00:57Jorge's literally the same age as my parents
00:01:03I never want to be surprised about something you've done. I came here with you not to feel alone
00:01:10I feel like you're not attracted to me
00:01:14We're kind of in a friend zone right now
00:01:16Okay
00:01:18Is he the right person? Did I pick the right person?
00:01:22Okay, I'm really done talking
00:01:24Can I get this mic off me please?
00:01:27This connection is not gonna be easy to find
00:01:31And I know I won't find this again
00:01:38Starting tomorrow you are getting visitors your friends your families
00:01:44Hi
00:01:46I've never dated anyone this much older
00:01:49I hope it works out well for them, but it's weird. It's weird being 23
00:01:53Mm-hmm
00:01:54And potentially having two immediate children
00:01:58Yeah
00:01:59I'm leaving everybody
00:02:01And everything I've worked for
00:02:03What the fuck am I doing?
00:02:05I'm just exhausted and I'm overwhelmed because I feel like I can't be myself with you
00:02:13Integrating a 22 year old girl into my life is definitely concerning
00:02:19Is there a future with us?
00:02:21I play my desire
00:02:22It's decision time
00:02:24Do you commit to taking this leap together?
00:02:27Play my desire
00:02:29Or do you choose a different path?
00:02:31Alone
00:02:35It sucks
00:02:52Did you get everything out of the bathroom?
00:02:55But I'll check the other rooms
00:02:57You work on your
00:02:59I think you need to get a garment bag
00:03:01Yeah
00:03:02I feel nervous anxious
00:03:05This is the last time I'm going to see her before the commitment ceremony
00:03:09Everything I can do, I did
00:03:11I'm super nervous about
00:03:14My alone time and you know, what is that alone time going to lead me to
00:03:18Think
00:03:20Part of me wants to commit to Vanessa
00:03:23And then part of me is like, is this right?
00:03:26Is this up and down too much for us to handle, you know
00:03:31And my fear of commitment continues to be my fear of commitment, right?
00:03:36And so that's
00:03:39It's a scary thought
00:03:41How are you doing?
00:03:42I got all your stuff ready for you
00:03:43Thank you
00:03:45How are you feeling?
00:03:46Okay, how are you?
00:03:47I'm good
00:03:50I'm sad, I don't want you to leave
00:03:51I don't even know what to say
00:03:54I know
00:03:56It's been fun
00:04:17I feel like we're breaking off
00:04:19This is like a breakup
00:04:22I don't know what to say
00:04:25What if I cry?
00:04:29Don't
00:04:29Don't cry?
00:04:31No
00:04:31Okay
00:04:31You'll be okay
00:04:34You look amazing
00:04:35Thanks
00:04:38No
00:04:42You're okay
00:04:44You're okay?
00:04:46You're okay?
00:04:46Mm-hmm
00:04:46You're okay?
00:04:47Yeah
00:04:48Promise?
00:04:49Mm-hmm
00:04:51I'm here for you
00:04:54Yeah
00:04:55Okay
00:04:57I just have PTSD, I think
00:05:00What?
00:05:01I don't know
00:05:01Just with like the history of my relationships not working out, you know
00:05:06And I feel like this is just another
00:05:09A failed attempt, you know
00:05:12Like it's not you
00:05:13I don't want to project it on you
00:05:15It's not you at all
00:05:16It's just
00:05:17I've just put myself out there before and
00:05:20Only to get hurt
00:05:22And I just hope like this doesn't have the same outcome
00:05:25That's scary
00:05:34Coming into this with Logan
00:05:35I had so many reservations because I had been so hurt before
00:05:40So there is this guard up like I'll be okay, I'll be okay, you know
00:05:44And maybe I won't be okay
00:05:46I just hope I chose right this time and I picked the right person and I feel like you are
00:05:52and
00:05:53I hope that you feel the same about me
00:05:56Yeah, I mean, I do
00:05:58It's really scary to
00:06:01Not put yourself out there for this many years
00:06:04Get this close to someone
00:06:06Only for
00:06:08Yourself to be devastated all over again
00:06:11And for the whole world to see
00:06:13Let's see
00:06:14Yeah, okay, okay, take care of yourself to see an older woman with a man 20 years younger like that's
00:06:21rare
00:06:21It's very rare and it's like am I delusional to think that it would even work?
00:06:27You know am I delusional to put my heart out there?
00:06:31I mean, he's like in the prime of his life right now, honestly
00:06:40And why would he give that up for someone 20 years older than him?
00:06:44I'll hold out, I'll hold out, I'll hold out
00:06:49But I hope you'll prove me wrong
00:06:59You're leaving
00:07:00I know, I'm just trying to make sure I don't forget anything
00:07:03But you're forgetting me
00:07:06I think that we need this little bit of separation because we haven't had it
00:07:10And this is the first time that I think I'm going to be able to look at this from the
00:07:14outside
00:07:15Make a clear decision
00:07:17Clearly me and leah have had ups and downs since we moved in together
00:07:20But at the same time there's been much blessings from this relationship
00:07:24Even during the difficult times the care and the love for each other has always been constant and
00:07:29I think that it's very clear that I care so much for her
00:07:35So the question is is that does the good outweigh the bad and and are these good moments enough to
00:07:41continue in this relationship?
00:07:48Thank you for being you
00:07:50Thank you for making me a better person
00:07:52You're welcome
00:07:54You're seriously
00:07:58Why are you looking at me like that?
00:08:00Because you're leaving
00:08:03We didn't even get to dance yet
00:08:09Yeah
00:08:12We have a lot of thinking we both have a lot of thinking to do
00:08:14I know
00:08:15I
00:08:21I'm gonna miss
00:08:24I'm gonna miss you a little bit
00:08:25I might miss you too
00:08:26I think more than you think
00:08:30You're not gonna be able to sleep now because you're thinking about me
00:08:32Maybe I don't know about that
00:08:34What?
00:08:35I might be able to sleep
00:08:36No you won't
00:08:38Give me my kiss
00:08:42It's like bittersweet this morning
00:08:43All right, I'll see you
00:08:45I'll see you
00:08:45With the commitment ceremony coming up
00:08:47It's gonna be difficult
00:08:48We're still debating on how we're even gonna make it work here, right?
00:08:52Let alone commit to each other
00:08:54I know he likes me and we're leaving off in a great space right now
00:08:59But yeah, I don't want to put any pressure on it
00:09:02Because I don't know
00:09:03I don't know what the future holds for us
00:09:05Because the words won't buffer anymore
00:09:10How are you feeling?
00:09:13About what?
00:09:14Leaving
00:09:14Mm-hmm
00:09:15I feel like I've been the one that brings up, you know, some of the more challenging things and
00:09:21We don't know how
00:09:22Yeah
00:09:23We're gonna communicate after this
00:09:25Like we've only
00:09:27Ever been in this bubble
00:09:28So like we don't know what it's like to text or call or
00:09:32I've never done long distance before
00:09:34So those things naturally I feel like are are things that I'm thinking about
00:09:39Yeah, I'm glad you brought it
00:09:42Um, up because I just wasn't even thinking about it that way at all
00:09:47I think I'm just someone that is very realistic
00:09:50Yeah
00:09:50And you know
00:09:52Yeah, no, I understand
00:09:53I know that this has to end at some point
00:09:54And just, you know, I mean, I wish we could stay in this little bubble forever
00:10:02But, you know, we have to say goodbye
00:10:05The fact that the next time I am going to see Andrew is a commitment ceremony
00:10:10Gives me a little bit of anxiety, honestly
00:10:14I know he's in his head and I don't blame him too much because
00:10:18Those doubts were in the back of my mind
00:10:20I just wasn't really vocalizing them
00:10:22There is a part of me that's afraid that
00:10:25The age gap between Andrew and I will just be too much
00:10:29And yeah, I have a fear that ultimately that will just
00:10:33Be too overwhelming for both of us
00:10:43Okay
00:10:46Bye bye
00:10:48See ya
00:10:49See ya
00:10:51See ya
00:10:55Bye bye
00:10:57Bye bye
00:10:58Bye bye
00:11:00Bye bye
00:11:03Bye bye
00:11:06Bye bye
00:11:08Bye bye
00:11:16Bye bye
00:11:17Bye bye
00:11:18Bye bye
00:11:27Oh.
00:11:27More of that.
00:11:29Aww.
00:11:43Is that beautiful?
00:11:44Mm-hmm.
00:11:46Well, I will think of you every time I look at them.
00:11:50I was thinking about that this time away.
00:11:55I love supporting you,
00:11:57and I love being here for you when...
00:12:03you're going through some shit,
00:12:05so I'll be thinking about you.
00:12:09Um...
00:12:09I'm gonna have some time just to, like, think
00:12:13and get myself, like, more centered.
00:12:16Mm-hmm.
00:12:17Um...
00:12:17And...
00:12:19I'm gonna miss you for sure.
00:12:20We've gotten so close in such a short period of time,
00:12:24and living together was amazing.
00:12:27Um...
00:12:27I'm gonna miss that for sure.
00:12:30But I think this time apart is gonna be good for us,
00:12:33even though I hate saying goodbye.
00:12:37Um...
00:12:38So I'm glad I have these.
00:12:42I'm there with you.
00:12:44Okay.
00:12:49Well, thanks for being everything for me.
00:12:51Mm-hmm.
00:12:52And...
00:12:55Don't miss me too much.
00:12:57Impossible.
00:13:00I am in love with Theresa.
00:13:02The way she's allowed me to open up
00:13:05and be vulnerable
00:13:06and not put on a facade,
00:13:08which I've done in the past,
00:13:09and just the joy she brings me,
00:13:11like, when I wake up and I see her,
00:13:12and, like, that sense of home,
00:13:14it feels good.
00:13:16Mm-hmm.
00:13:17I love you.
00:13:18Am I hoping that we come out on the same page
00:13:22and even a little stronger?
00:13:23Yeah, and I think that's a possibility.
00:13:29But there's a chance that...
00:13:31It's gonna be weird.
00:13:33I don't know.
00:13:36She...
00:13:37just...
00:13:38gets way too in her head,
00:13:41and...
00:13:41she might be a different person
00:13:43when I see her again.
00:13:45Goodbye.
00:13:46Okay, goodbye.
00:13:56I have a huge, huge decision to make.
00:14:03There's no denying
00:14:04that we had a true and real connection
00:14:07from the beginning.
00:14:08Time is gonna let you down.
00:14:15However,
00:14:16I still have some doubts.
00:14:21Is this just the final call?
00:14:26It's a huge commitment
00:14:28to say that this person,
00:14:33who's 27 years younger than me,
00:14:35is my boyfriend.
00:14:38And that I'm going to commit
00:14:40to going forward with this
00:14:42and opening this up to the world.
00:14:48I don't know if...
00:14:50I have the strength to see this through.
00:15:02It's cheers to this journey
00:15:03that we've had.
00:15:05Cheers.
00:15:05Cheers to a big decision.
00:15:06A very big decision coming.
00:15:16How do you feel?
00:15:19I know how I feel about you.
00:15:22I know that that doesn't always make everything
00:15:25A-okay and easy.
00:15:27I do understand the logistics of where we are
00:15:30in life.
00:15:32Geographical challenges,
00:15:34other challenges as well.
00:15:35So, you know,
00:15:37it's time to take all that into consideration.
00:15:40Yeah.
00:15:41You know, this whole time,
00:15:42we've kind of been like,
00:15:43oh, we're in a fairy tale,
00:15:45and everything is perfectly smooth,
00:15:46and we're having no challenges.
00:15:48Which was true.
00:15:49It was true,
00:15:50up until these last few days.
00:15:52So, the fact that we're
00:15:54taking this time apart now
00:15:57has me
00:15:59a little bit unsure
00:16:03about my decision.
00:16:06A lot of questions have come up
00:16:08that I just have been ignoring,
00:16:09and I think I've been putting them off
00:16:11because I didn't want to ruin anything
00:16:14or have anything be different
00:16:15than what it was.
00:16:17So, like, while it is confusing
00:16:22and it's scary,
00:16:23I know that this time apart
00:16:25will end up benefiting both of us
00:16:29because my decision will be grounded
00:16:31and, like, it will be thoughtful.
00:16:35Yeah.
00:16:37And I respect that.
00:16:41I definitely think her concerns are valid,
00:16:44but one thing that I've done
00:16:46the last few days
00:16:48is try to truly focus on
00:16:50her feelings and her emotions,
00:16:53and I've taken myself out of it a little bit,
00:16:56and obviously,
00:16:57we're going to have some time apart
00:16:58to where, you know,
00:17:00I'm going to have to think that through
00:17:02on my side as well.
00:17:03And what does that look like?
00:17:05Because it's a big commitment,
00:17:08and can she handle it?
00:17:09See?
00:17:11We're probably just at different stages in life.
00:17:13I have my voice.
00:17:15How will that match?
00:17:16There's so many question marks.
00:17:19I'd be lying to you
00:17:21if I didn't say I was a little bit nervous.
00:17:23If it's not too late.
00:17:29If it's not too late.
00:17:33How could you feel?
00:17:34If it's not too late.
00:17:56so today is the commitment ceremony i feel confident but i don't know how she's been
00:18:05feeling i don't know if she let the thoughts get to her or the stress of her kids get to
00:18:10her
00:18:14you know i support her and i'm here for her and my family supports you know our relationship
00:18:21but i'm worried that teresa hasn't bought in because of a lot of factors that i can't control
00:18:33i'm fully committed to teresa
00:18:44and i hope she's ready to take that leap with me
00:19:01my feelings are getting much stronger every day for john i have to admit that you know i am
00:19:07falling for him it's almost been too good to be true but there's also a piece of me that still
00:19:14has doubts
00:19:21this age gap difference is huge and yeah i'm scared
00:19:31i have the option of walking away today
00:19:36and you know i'd be walking away from a lot i know that i will regret not having him in
00:19:43my life
00:19:44but i don't know if it's going to be too much should we just
00:19:52take the easy route and go our separate ways and go back to our lives the way they were
00:19:59i don't know if i'm ready for this
00:20:02a final teardrop
00:20:33we've gone through a lot of hard stuff early on
00:20:37that i'm thankful for we had to be there for each other and that says something i've never
00:20:42been able to be there for someone i was never in the right headspace for it i was never open
00:20:46to
00:20:47receive this and to support someone like i've supported you i feel lucky that i get to show up for
00:20:55you
00:20:56i'm confident in this i'm confident in what we've built i know what we have and it's the feeling
00:21:04it's the immediate sense of calmness that you bring me whenever i see you
00:21:12us being able to laugh during the most serious moments
00:21:17most intimate moments i'm looking forward to
00:21:24that next step and we'll get there with the age thing
00:21:30i need you to believe that age is just a number but also believe in me that every day i'm
00:21:36going to show
00:21:36up and work on this together
00:21:44when i decided to take this journey to find someone to share my life with
00:21:52yourself i said to myself that i was ready when i met you you drew me in with your smile
00:22:01your energy and your steadiness
00:22:06you made me laugh
00:22:09and you made me feel better than i ever had in the past
00:22:16but for whatever reason there was still something holding me back
00:22:23when you met my kids and i didn't tell them your age
00:22:27it wasn't because i was ashamed it was because i was scared
00:22:33scared because if i spoke it it would be real
00:22:38scared because of the things we might face from the world
00:22:45knowing that the world is not fair and that there is a double standard
00:22:51against women who date younger men
00:22:54so it got me thinking maybe it would be better if i walked away
00:23:00before it got to be too difficult
00:23:05and
00:23:08too real
00:23:10i'm kidding
00:23:15it's a lot
00:23:20really scary thing for me
00:23:23if i let myself
00:23:28be totally vulnerable
00:23:31with you
00:23:33and the world
00:23:35it's the hugest risk i will ever have taken
00:23:44i just didn't see this coming
00:23:55just told what we needed from what we were feeling
00:24:01i mean we've shared some amazing times together
00:24:06and you've been really patient
00:24:07and very understanding
00:24:14but i just worry that it's too much
00:24:20you're not up for the fight
00:24:23i mean i'm a fighter
00:24:26i'm also just trying to protect myself
00:24:29and to protect you
00:24:33i don't know what to say
00:24:36there's a letter
00:24:37that my kids wrote to you
00:24:40that i want to read
00:24:49all right
00:24:50dear john
00:24:51it was really nice meeting you
00:24:53and watching you
00:24:54and our mom together
00:25:00she just seemed so happy
00:25:02and we haven't seen her like that in a while
00:25:10give me a second
00:25:14we don't know exactly what the age difference is
00:25:17but it doesn't matter to us
00:25:19after seeing you two together
00:25:22we just want her to be happy
00:25:26and you clearly do that
00:25:27so we support your relationship
00:25:30and are excited for whatever comes next
00:25:34love lauren, richard, and michael
00:25:45i just need to know if you believe that
00:25:48if you're up for that challenge
00:25:53and you believe and trust your kids
00:25:57that they support you
00:26:00i need you to wake up every morning
00:26:03and see and believe
00:26:06and trust that your kids support this
00:26:10and that whatever comes after that
00:26:11we can, you know, go to battle
00:26:15but it's up to you
00:26:18i've said the whole time
00:26:20the ball's in your court
00:26:21on if you believe that
00:26:27i mean it makes me feel a lot more confident
00:26:30and happy to know that
00:26:32they wrote that to you
00:26:35i had no idea what it said
00:26:38and so i don't want to walk away
00:26:43in fact i want to walk
00:26:45towards something with you
00:26:48and i don't know exactly what that will be
00:26:50or what that will look like
00:26:53but i think together
00:26:55you know, we can navigate it
00:26:58and i think if you are able to support
00:27:02me and my crazy anxiety
00:27:09you know, we can make this into something really special
00:27:15i think so too
00:27:16and i will be able at some point
00:27:21to maybe scream it from the mountaintop
00:27:27but right now
00:27:30i'm just going to
00:27:32promise you
00:27:34and commit to you
00:27:36to continue
00:27:37to build our relationship
00:27:39into something real
00:27:41and something really great
00:27:49i accept
00:27:52hilarious
00:27:54i'm excited for
00:27:56whatever's next
00:27:58and
00:27:59i'm thankful
00:27:59for this experience
00:28:01and
00:28:03i want to continue
00:28:04falling in love with you
00:28:08so do i
00:28:09i love you
00:28:11i love you too
00:28:13i love you too much
00:28:14to let you go
00:28:16i'm good because you don't have to
00:28:18good answer
00:28:34all your dreams
00:28:37and all your fears
00:28:40you think those worlds collide
00:28:46i'm feeling a little nervous
00:28:49i have confidence in derek
00:28:51and i have confidence in our relationship
00:28:53but
00:28:54i still have a lot of fears
00:28:56about my own future
00:28:58ring it on the bell
00:29:00i just want to help
00:29:02i just want to know
00:29:04i mean i'm 23
00:29:06i never imagined
00:29:07that i would be moving across the country
00:29:10moving for a man
00:29:12who has children
00:29:13and i think the fear
00:29:15is just coming from a place
00:29:16of not having experience
00:29:18in being in that sort of relationship
00:29:21or being with somebody who has kids
00:29:26this is a big decision
00:29:29essentially i either walk away
00:29:32without derek
00:29:33and i go back to my life in seattle
00:29:35or
00:29:35i leave with derek
00:29:37and
00:29:38i get something extremely different
00:29:40than anything i could have ever imagined
00:29:43when you let the love
00:29:45inside
00:29:46i'm conflicted it's like
00:29:48do i risk it all
00:29:49and change everything i know
00:29:51for a man
00:29:52and for a relationship
00:29:53or
00:29:53do i make the hard decision to end it
00:29:56but you can't find a way
00:29:59to let me in
00:30:02not in a million years
00:30:04did i ever think
00:30:05that i would come into this experience
00:30:07and find such a real
00:30:09genuine
00:30:10authentic connection
00:30:12and you say
00:30:13oh
00:30:14i don't wanna know
00:30:17it feels like i'm getting married
00:30:18honestly
00:30:19there's a lot weighing on it
00:30:22you know
00:30:22there's a whole life change
00:30:23that she has to consider
00:30:24the last conversation
00:30:26we had
00:30:27she definitely has some question marks
00:30:29and the nerves are there
00:30:30she's scared
00:30:31and giving up her life
00:30:33possibly changing her career
00:30:35i know that's a lot
00:30:37i'm wanting to be sympathetic
00:30:39and empathetic to that
00:30:40but i want her in dallas with me
00:30:42but i'm not sure
00:30:43that our relationship
00:30:45at this time
00:30:46is strong enough for her
00:30:48to make that change
00:30:49i just wanna know
00:30:53why you can't find a way
00:30:55to let me in
00:30:58thank you
00:31:02from the first date
00:31:03i didn't know exactly what it was
00:31:05but i knew i was
00:31:06extremely comfortable with it
00:31:07i felt at ease
00:31:09at peace
00:31:10from just
00:31:10a quick conversation
00:31:12like honestly
00:31:14that moment i knew
00:31:16like deep down that
00:31:17i didn't
00:31:19want to even explore
00:31:20any other options
00:31:21at the retreat
00:31:24and you know
00:31:25we continued on
00:31:26moved in
00:31:29and you know
00:31:30yeah there were some nerves
00:31:31it's not easy to think i'm gonna move in with someone that i just met
00:31:35but through that process i thought that it would be great
00:31:39but i was wrong like it was much better than i could have even imagined
00:31:44so for me you know the journey all the last and all the good times the challenges and tough conversations
00:31:53were just as important i feel like we've grown every point alone is right
00:32:00from the first day
00:32:02from the first day i knew that you were special
00:32:05despite our 20 year age gap i'm certain that my greatest blessing was meeting you
00:32:13i've always thought about and dreamed about the man i would end up with but you are far better
00:32:23than anybody i could have imagined
00:32:28and now i can't imagine
00:32:31a future without you in it
00:32:38i've been confident in your character
00:32:40since our first date
00:32:44but after moving in
00:32:46i'm certain that you were one of the best men
00:32:50that i've ever met
00:32:59it's been an honor
00:33:01to share this journey with you
00:33:04and the closer we get
00:33:07the more i know
00:33:08and the more i see
00:33:09just how great of a man that you are
00:33:11and i feel like i'm the luckiest girl in the whole world to have found you here
00:33:38many people spend their whole lives looking for what we found here
00:33:45if i were to leave here without you i may regret it for the rest of my life
00:33:52but if we were to stay together
00:33:56my life would look wildly different than i ever anticipated
00:34:04i would be sacrificing my entire life in seattle
00:34:09my friends
00:34:10my support
00:34:12and everything i've built over the last four years
00:34:21but
00:34:23today
00:34:24today
00:34:24i'm putting the unknowns aside
00:34:27and i'm trusting my heart
00:34:30so
00:34:31i am one hundred percent committed
00:34:34to moving to dallas
00:34:37and starting
00:34:39our dreams together
00:34:42outside of all of this
00:34:48yeah
00:34:49that was
00:34:49a lot
00:34:52but i promise
00:34:53i'm always gonna put in the work
00:34:57i'm always gonna try
00:34:59i'll always protect you
00:35:01and i'll always protect your heart
00:35:03Pfeiffer i truly love you
00:35:06so
00:35:06this is
00:35:08my gift to you
00:35:12it's a key
00:35:13to our place
00:35:14that's been my place
00:35:15thank you
00:35:17that means the world to me
00:35:19truly
00:35:19absolutely
00:35:21i don't want you to be alone
00:35:22and i don't want you in dallas
00:35:23in a separate place
00:35:24literally
00:35:25my place is our place
00:35:26i feel like the luckiest person in the whole world
00:35:30and i have this whole time
00:35:32it makes two of us big
00:35:58i think i just got one more breath
00:36:01broken heart is beating out of my chest
00:36:05tired of running i just need some rest
00:36:09i came here to be able to open my heart up to find someone that i want to spend my
00:36:15life with you know
00:36:15when i think about my future i just want to be happily married to a wonderful guy
00:36:29i'm like a hopeless romantic you know so i would like for this to work out with chris
00:36:40i'm like a hopeless romantic you know so i would like for this to work out with chris
00:36:49i'm not sure
00:36:50i can't give up hope regardless
00:36:53don't have any blood
00:36:56i feel very uneasy
00:36:58clearly me and leah have love for each other
00:36:59because we have been on an emotional rollercoaster
00:37:02if we didn't have love for each other as soon as it got really dark we wouldn't be here anymore
00:37:06the question was and still is are we in love
00:37:12leah is somebody that i have built such a connection with and a care for that i want to
00:37:18look past what we've dealt with and try to move forward
00:37:22at the same time i'm trying to figure out am i ready for this or am i not
00:37:29because it's a decision that will affect me forever
00:37:34logic emotions my head my gut which one do i listen to and there's so many voices
00:37:40whether it's outside or in our own heads that are telling us to do a certain thing
00:37:44and i'm trying to just ignore everything that society says should happen
00:37:48and listen to what i know is true which is the the voice in my heart telling me what is
00:37:53right
00:37:59you look good you look beautiful
00:38:09prior to this retreat i was praying that god would send me my person
00:38:15and i was really hoping well maybe they'll be at this retreat
00:38:19and then i met you and then from our first conversation
00:38:24i knew we had something special and our first gift was fire
00:38:29you lit something inside of me that i thought was gone
00:38:35i know we've had our fair share of ups and downs
00:38:40but for me the good times outweigh the bad
00:38:49you challenged me to do and be better and i thank you for that
00:38:56thank you for hearing seeing and always telling me to just be me
00:39:04thank you from day one we've talked about being honest and being open and i think that
00:39:13the most important thing i want to highlight is just how honest and open you've allowed me to feel
00:39:20you've challenged me you've helped me grow and i hope i've done the same
00:39:25i can't thank you enough for the experiences that we have lived
00:39:36we've had ups and downs and there's no doubting that
00:39:40there has been difficult times and there's been beautiful times
00:39:44and i want to remember both
00:39:50i think that we do need to continue to be honest with each other
00:39:55and
00:39:57you know we've talked about our age difference many times
00:40:02and maybe the age gap was harder than we thought but here we are and i think we've both made
00:40:11a decision
00:40:11that will impact our lives and our families and i just hope and pray that's the right one
00:40:19i think i just wanted you to be able to see what i see and i wanted to show you
00:40:25the world i want to see more with you
00:40:29and i want to get you out of your comfort zone
00:40:31you know and i do want to challenge you in all the ways that i can and i love it
00:40:37when you challenge me too
00:40:38i can see myself growing with you building with you
00:40:42um i know it's not easy
00:40:45i understand that we weren't at our best
00:40:50and it's like i want to see you be at your best
00:40:52and me at my best and see how we can be our best together
00:40:58i would like to commit to you
00:41:05excuse me
00:41:09so
00:41:11wow
00:41:20so we've talked about our differences and we laid out what we want out of a partner
00:41:26from day one i think we both want to have a family i think we both want to settle down
00:41:30i think maybe
00:41:31we want it at different paces i do think that the age difference did cause an unnecessary pressure
00:41:36on both of us and put us in a situation where
00:41:41for the first time in my life i felt like it was hard for me to be myself
00:41:57and that's why ultimately i feel that this partnership is not right
00:42:15and ultimately i can't move forward with something that i don't feel is 100% right
00:42:22i don't feel like that's fair to you i don't feel like that's fair to your family or mine
00:42:27so i am deciding to end this relationship here
00:42:38honestly i will cherish every single freaking moment and experience
00:42:44and i hope that this isn't the end of a friendship that i truly value
00:42:50i do
00:42:51i just seriously thank you
00:42:52you're welcome
00:42:54and you are a beautiful person inside and out
00:42:58can i have a hug
00:43:10It's nice meeting you.
00:43:14Shh.
00:43:39It's nice meeting you.
00:43:44At least I gave my all.
00:43:48I was hoping to find my love here at the retreat, but I didn't.
00:43:54Overall, I think I've just learned who I am.
00:43:57And I'm a very strong, intelligent, beautiful woman.
00:44:00And my future partner will be happy to be with me.
00:44:04And I'm excited for him.
00:44:06No words left to say, cause I'll be okay.
00:44:12I'm strong enough.
00:44:27I'm definitely a little bit unsure.
00:44:33You know, the last few days, I've definitely been in my head.
00:44:37I mean, there's so much fear there.
00:44:40That the age gap will be too much.
00:44:42Where we're at in our lives will be too much.
00:44:44The timing.
00:44:45The distance.
00:44:46Come and drink this water.
00:44:49Cause my carpet overflows.
00:44:52Are we too far away from where the other person is in life?
00:44:57And I would be lying if I said that that still doesn't cross my mind every single day with Libby.
00:45:06There's definitely two sides going back and forth that's like, it's not gonna work.
00:45:12One's going off of previous experiences and all of the things that haven't worked.
00:45:18And then the other side of it is like, my heart.
00:45:21Can you see the shoes worn out of my feet?
00:45:28I'm a bit nervous going into this.
00:45:30Me and Andrew have been so solid this entire experience.
00:45:33I don't think I expected to get to this point this morning and be questioning things.
00:45:39Sit outside.
00:45:41But the past couple days, he's brought up the thing about him worrying about taking from my life.
00:45:49And the distance between us.
00:45:51So, I'm smiling a little bit too.
00:45:54Andrew's doubts are putting more ideas in my head.
00:45:58I'm like, wait, is he right?
00:46:00Is this gonna work?
00:46:02Every single time.
00:46:04His doubts have now become my doubts.
00:46:07And I think all of this is really starting to freak me out.
00:46:17I don't know how he's feeling.
00:46:19And I don't know if he's decided that the age difference, it's too much.
00:46:25So, I think it's very possible that Andrew's gonna break my heart on this mountain today.
00:46:29Every single time.
00:46:33And you missed the sun.
00:46:36I will sit outside.
00:46:39Wait for you.
00:46:41What's up?
00:46:43Thanks.
00:46:44Mm-hmm.
00:46:45You look handsome.
00:46:46It's true.
00:46:51I came here hoping to find something, but I don't think I truly believed that I would find something real.
00:47:02There's a part of me that wonders if this works when we're outside of the bubble that we've been living
00:47:09in.
00:47:11You're 22.
00:47:12I'm 38.
00:47:15That's a big gap.
00:47:18You know, your life is just getting started.
00:47:21You're figuring out who you are, what you want, where you're going.
00:47:28And I'm settled in the life that I've already built.
00:47:33The biggest fear for me is keeping you from your dreams, even though you're a part of mine.
00:47:47I understand what you mean, and obviously, I've been thinking about that, too.
00:47:52You know that sometimes it's hard for me to really express how I'm feeling with my words.
00:48:00And sometimes it's better and easier for me to write it out.
00:48:05So I wrote you something.
00:48:15Coming into this experience, I hoped for the best, but I truly never thought that I'd meet someone like you.
00:48:22You have everything that I've ever wanted in a guy, which is incredibly rare because that includes some outrageous things,
00:48:29like someone who will sing Taylor Swift with me and manifest.
00:48:33You challenged me to open up in ways I never have before and brought out a side of me that
00:48:39not many people get to see.
00:48:41I love the way you talk and care about your daughters and the way you protect them in every aspect
00:48:46shows what a great dad you are.
00:48:49Hearing about your experiences as a father has been one of the many things that drew me to you.
00:48:54With that being said, I know that that comes with a lot of weight and it's something that I don't
00:48:59take lightly.
00:48:59And I know that you're worried about our age gap and the fact that I'm 22 and you think that
00:49:08there's a possibility that you could be taking too much from my life.
00:49:14And it has me thinking the last couple of days about what it is that I really want.
00:49:21And I really feel like it would only be an addition to my life.
00:49:34I've had a lot of time to think as well.
00:49:40And the truth is, no matter how much I doubt the age gap, the distance, the timing,
00:49:53I don't doubt the way I feel when I'm with you.
00:50:00When we first got here, you asked me if I ever thought I could fall in love before the end
00:50:11of this.
00:50:13And I remember saying, I think someone could, but I didn't think I would be that someone.
00:50:25I was wrong.
00:50:29Because I have.
00:50:32And I do love you.
00:50:36You have opened up things in me I thought were shut down for good.
00:50:43But I've been waiting a long time for something like this.
00:50:49A really long time.
00:50:51And I feel like it's finally my turn.
00:50:55Like this might actually be my rom-com.
00:51:01Happy ending.
00:51:03I know, I'm so cheesy.
00:51:05No, I love it.
00:51:08I've been thinking a lot about what happens after this.
00:51:15And I don't know what your generation calls it these days.
00:51:23Hard launch.
00:51:26Soft launch.
00:51:27It's probably something way cooler than what I'm about to say.
00:51:34But I would really love to leave here with you as my girlfriend.
00:51:40Do you want to hard launch me?
00:51:42I want to hard launch you.
00:51:44I'm gonna need you to answer before I continue.
00:51:47Okay.
00:51:48Okay.
00:51:49I want to commit to you.
00:51:52And I want a relationship with you outside of here.
00:51:55Because I also love you too.
00:52:10So, there is one more thing.
00:52:13My daughters.
00:52:15They are the most important thing to me.
00:52:21With you, you make me feel safe.
00:52:25Make you feel safe to open up that box again.
00:52:31And I would really love for you to come to Baltimore.
00:52:35For you to meet my daughters.
00:52:37Because I do see you in my future forever.
00:52:45That means the world is coming from you.
00:52:48That's really sweet.
00:52:50I think that I know how important your daughters are to you.
00:52:56And I want you to know that I think that that's something that's equally important to me.
00:53:03And I think that if you were willing to open that part of your life to me.
00:53:10I would be happy to be a part of it.
00:53:15I really do love you.
00:53:20I really do love you too.
00:53:41I'm in a really good place in my life.
00:53:44I'm getting ready to turn 50 years old.
00:53:47I've never felt more comfortable in my body.
00:53:50Financially, spiritually, everything.
00:53:52And the one thing that is missing is love.
00:53:55And I know we'll see you soon.
00:53:59I thought I was never going to find love again.
00:54:02But Logan makes my heart feel full.
00:54:05And he gives me hope.
00:54:06And he makes me feel alive.
00:54:09There's no more goodbyes.
00:54:14I'll build it all with you.
00:54:17Logan and I have had a lot of ups and downs.
00:54:20We're finally at a really good place.
00:54:22Except for the question mark, is he ready for a commitment?
00:54:26Is Logan going to take a step forward and be ready for a commitment?
00:54:30Or is he ready to go back to his party boy lifestyle in Dallas?
00:54:35And I'll go back to Ohio and start over from square one.
00:54:46The thought of going home alone would just be devastating.
00:54:51I don't want this to end.
00:54:54There's been days when I've lost myself.
00:54:58I've obviously fallen in love with Vanessa.
00:55:00Our love feels so in sync.
00:55:04It feels like something that I really...
00:55:06To be honest, I didn't think I would find.
00:55:09If I could ride
00:55:13Would fuse my bones
00:55:16She loves me in a way that I haven't been loved before.
00:55:20It's crazy that she's 20 years older than me.
00:55:24But regardless of age, I don't know if I'm going to find anybody else like Vanessa.
00:55:32Going into the commitment ceremony, the unknown is, am I going to be able to give her what she truly
00:55:37wants?
00:55:38There's a chance that, you know, I get up there and see this woman that I've fallen in love with.
00:55:44And it's picture perfect.
00:55:46And there's a chance that I might not be able to meet those expectations.
00:55:50There's a chance that we walk away without each other.
00:56:00Hi.
00:56:01Hey.
00:56:02You look so cute.
00:56:04Good to see you.
00:56:04Yeah.
00:56:04I'm so nervous.
00:56:06Yeah, right?
00:56:07Yeah.
00:56:10Can I hold your hands?
00:56:12It helps me move our nerves.
00:56:16Logan, when I first met you, you were such a gentleman.
00:56:20We had an amazing conversation.
00:56:22And then we go out on our date.
00:56:26And you tell me you're worried about the optics of dating an older woman.
00:56:30And I'm like, what is up with this guy? I can't figure him out.
00:56:33So I was like, forget it, you know, but you did a few things that were really important to me.
00:56:44You apologize and you took accountability for your actions.
00:56:48And that meant a lot to me.
00:56:50So I decided I really want to give this guy a chance.
00:56:57Um, yeah.
00:57:00I feel that with you, I opened up more than anyone else I've ever opened up to in my life.
00:57:08I feel safe with you.
00:57:09And that's something that's so important to me.
00:57:13I was really in a dark time before I came here.
00:57:16You know, I lost my mom and it's been almost a year.
00:57:20And being with you, you brought light back into my life.
00:57:23And I'm happy that you're here.
00:57:26I'm happy to be here.
00:57:31Yeah, I mean, our journey has been everything but picture perfect.
00:57:38Despite the whirlwind, we found a connection.
00:57:42And I think, you know, you challenged me and you asked me the tough questions and wondered if I was
00:57:51ready for a commitment, ready for something serious, or I was just another flame for you.
00:57:58Yeah.
00:58:00But the reality is, you have made me into a better man.
00:58:05And going on this process with you, it was like nothing I could imagine.
00:58:11I'm glad after all those hardships that we landed in this place of peace and love and there's no more
00:58:18fighting.
00:58:18And I don't want to go back to my old life without you in it.
00:58:23So, that being said, I would like to bring you into my world and meet my family, meet my friends
00:58:31and be by my side.
00:58:32And, you know, as we move forward, I'm hoping you would do the same for me and allow me to
00:58:39meet your friends and your family and be a part of your world, because I really want you to be
00:58:44a part of my world.
00:58:56Is this the part you break up with me?
00:59:03Here's the thing.
00:59:11Our journey has had a lot of ups and downs.
00:59:15And the chaos that we've found is, it's, you know, is that toxic or was it healthy, right?
00:59:30And it's really made me question whether or not it's good for us, right?
00:59:41The time alone has made me realize that maybe I'm not the man for you.
00:59:53Maybe I'm not good enough for you.
00:59:55It's really questioning that.
01:00:02It's, it's, it has been difficult and I don't want to make promises that I can't keep.
01:00:18So, I need the promise ring back.
01:00:20It's my God.
01:00:53It's been a tough journey.
01:00:57My first instinct is always the correct instinct, and I should stick with my first gut instinct on someone.
01:01:05And maybe I was just trying to fit a square peg into a round hole, and my picker was wrong
01:01:12once again.
01:01:14Yeah, but during my alone time, I've also realized that maybe I don't have to be the perfect man.
01:01:31Maybe I just needed to be the guy that was there for you throughout all the good times, highs and
01:01:39lows.
01:01:40Somebody that you could talk to and count on.
01:01:43Somebody that would always be there for you, just like your mom was before she left.
01:01:49And I think spending time with you, enjoying you, not realizing there was an age gap, has made me want
01:02:02to commit.
01:02:04Just let it go.
01:02:06What is happening?
01:02:09What?
01:02:10I don't want this journey to end.
01:02:13Oh my God.
01:02:14What is happening?
01:02:16And, you know, it's been a crazy rollercoaster of a ride, but I'm not getting off anytime soon, hey?
01:02:28I love the shit out of you.
01:02:31And, you know, I want to make a promise and a commitment.
01:02:37You're someone who deserves everything.
01:02:40What is happening?
01:02:42And someone who deserves the Kobe ring.
01:02:45Stop it.
01:02:46No.
01:02:48Is this really happening?
01:02:51Vanessa.
01:02:52Stop.
01:02:54I'm not ready to get off anytime soon.
01:02:57What's happening?
01:02:59So, you want to continue this journey and do life together?
01:03:11Yes, I do.
01:03:15Oh my God.
01:03:16I'm shaking.
01:03:20Oh my God.
01:03:21Oh my God.
01:03:23It's so pretty.
01:03:24So, let's do it.
01:03:25Oh my gosh.
01:03:26I fucking love you.
01:03:31Oh my God.
01:03:34Oh my goodness.
01:03:36You got red lipstick on you.
01:03:37Yeah, I know.
01:03:39Oh my God, I'm shaking.
01:03:41You tricked me so hard.
01:03:45When you started attacking me, I was like, oh, shit.
01:03:49Oh my God.
01:03:51Oh my God.
01:03:53Oh my God.
01:03:54Oh my God.
01:03:57Oh my God.
01:03:57Oh my God.
01:03:58Age doesn't matter for us.
01:04:00As crazy as it is to get engaged to somebody that's 20 years older than me, it's Vanessa.
01:04:10She's the one that has changed me and she's the one that's made me feel ways that I haven't felt
01:04:16before.
01:04:17So, you know, at the end of the day, it's what I wanted.
01:04:21I ran every scenario of what could happen when I was coming here, but the one scenario I didn't think
01:04:27of was finding the love of my life.
01:04:30I came into this experience with a complete open mind and I'm really super happy with how it ended.
01:04:44I did not think I was going to come into this experience and completely change my life.
01:04:50What was your name?
01:04:51Derek.
01:04:52Derek.
01:04:53I'm Pfeiffer.
01:04:53I love your eyes.
01:04:55Me too.
01:04:57It's so rare that you find somebody that you connect with like this and I never would have expected it
01:05:02to go this way, but I'm so grateful that it has.
01:05:07You want to give me?
01:05:09Yeah.
01:05:09Pfeiffer's definitely a person I've been looking for.
01:05:12She's humble.
01:05:13She's loving.
01:05:14All of those are like something that I've definitely wanted, but I honestly didn't know that it existed.
01:05:21I've always thought age was just a number and damn, yeah, this experience really proves that it's just that.
01:05:31I came here to try something completely unorthodox,
01:05:34to meet people from all different ages and if anyone said you're going to come here and you're going to
01:05:40fall for a guy that's 20 years younger than you, I'd be like, you're absolutely crazy.
01:05:47Romeo, Romeo.
01:05:48Romeo, Romeo.
01:05:49Come here for out there, Romeo.
01:05:50No way, isn't it supposed to be the opposite way?
01:05:52Like, I think you're supposed to be up here with your hair.
01:05:54But what Logan and I have is something really special.
01:05:57So, I am 49.
01:06:02I was going to guess 29.
01:06:08Why Vanessa?
01:06:09I mean, I could have connected with anybody else.
01:06:13There were 19 other women at the retreat, some closer in age to me, but I don't think I would
01:06:18love anybody else like the way I love Vanessa.
01:06:20She's one in a million.
01:06:22Where do we go from here, you know?
01:06:24Snacks is being joyous.
01:06:25Stop it.
01:06:27I thought I was going to go into the last years of my life alone.
01:06:32And now, here I am turning 50 and I'm in love.
01:06:44I got more than everything I've ever wanted out of this experience.
01:06:48I met somebody I never thought I would meet.
01:06:52One, go!
01:06:53Andrew does see me for the real me and not my age.
01:06:57He sees parts of me that a lot of people don't.
01:07:00And he just recognizes it and he appreciates it.
01:07:04I don't think I've ever had that before.
01:07:05I'm enjoying what we have right now.
01:07:08I'm waking up to you.
01:07:09Yeah, well, it's probably the nicest thing I'll ever say to you.
01:07:11But, like, the more I get to know you, the more I like you more.
01:07:15I really do feel like I got my rom-com happy ending.
01:07:19And I don't think I could have scripted it any better.
01:07:24I absolutely believe age is just a number because I never would have thought that I could connect with somebody
01:07:32that is 27 years old on this level.
01:07:38I'm going to go for it.
01:07:40I love Sarisa.
01:07:41I love how she makes me feel.
01:07:45And for seeing me for who I am and loving me and accepting me for the 27-year-old is
01:07:52a little more mature.
01:07:54It's the connection that counts, not the candles on the cake.
01:07:58Should I grab your ass?
01:07:59I love you.
01:08:04I love you.
01:08:25See it in the new light
01:08:46I'm gonna do it
01:08:49Oh
01:08:55I, I shouldn't know I can't.
01:09:52I, I shouldn't know I can't.
01:10:22I, I shouldn't know I can't.
01:10:52I, I shouldn't know I can't.
01:10:55I, I shouldn't know I can't.
01:11:15I, I shouldn't know I can't.
01:11:16I, I shouldn't know I can't.
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