- 2 days ago
The Last Leg - Season 34 - Episode 04
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:02One more time, y'all!
00:04Thank you for lettin' us be ourselves
00:06So don't mind me if I repeat myself
00:08These simple lines be good for your health
00:11Keep them trying rhymes on the shelf
00:13Live my life like you just don't care
00:15Five and I believe is never scared
00:18Raise the noise, it's the moment they fear
00:20Get up, you still appear for my dear
00:22Get up, throw your hands in the air
00:25Get up, and shit right there
00:27Get up, get up, get up
00:38Check out the news, take a deep breath
00:40and try not to break a sweat
00:42It's Friday, we're live, and it's time for The Last Leg
00:47Tonight on the show, we'll check out
00:49what happened when Andrew got seized
00:51Find out whether social media's gonna get yanked
00:55and see who nudged what at the Winter Olympics
00:57Plus we'll be joined by comedians Bridget Christie
01:00and Chloe Petz
01:01on the show that always pushes its luck
01:20Oh, g'day, hello, oh
01:26Save it, there's a lot coming
01:28G'day, I'm Adam Hills, welcome to The Last Leg
01:30the show that's really glad we don't pre-record
01:32earlier in the week
01:36With me as always with the pride of Dartmoor
01:38Josh Whittacombe
01:39and the man who genuinely said on Wednesday
01:41and I quote
01:42I still reckon this Andrew thing's gonna escalate
01:48Alex Crystal Ball Brooker
01:58Crystal Ball Brooker sounds like another of my disabilities
02:06It's very delicate
02:08We will cover the biggest news of the year in a second
02:11but before we get there
02:13It's February
02:16I mean, I can't imagine it getting any bigger than what happened yesterday
02:19but Josh, you have had a big week of your own, right?
02:22Yes
02:22Oh, yes, I've been up to quite a lot
02:25I framed a man for a crime he didn't commit, actually
02:32I set up an email address, andypandyatgmail.com
02:36Sent a few emails to Jeffrey Epstein
02:38and I tell you what, it snowballed all right
02:40No, I didn't
02:42No, I went skiing
02:44I went on a skiing holiday for the first time, Adam
02:47Yes
02:48And I was, I'd never skied before, I'm 42
02:52I'm shocked to hear you've never skied before
02:56And I was excellent
03:01Would you like to see video proof of this?
03:03So, the, all right
03:08That sounded like you just, someone reacted to you saying you were going to strip
03:12Oh, yes
03:13I'll see a little bit of that
03:14My instructor's in
03:17So, my daughter, who's eight, is in the kind of pink trousers
03:21And then in between us is the instructor
03:24And then I'm the one, the third one coming down
03:26So, you'll see the kind of speed I'm cutting down the slopes
03:29Okay
03:33So, here I go, as you can see
03:36Absolutely nailing it
03:38Look at that
03:39Look at that speed
03:43Look at me go
03:45Look, wait for it
03:47Yeah
03:48Yes
03:58I love the fact that the instructor's gone
04:00Do you know what?
04:01I'm just going to let the eight-year-old go on their own
04:03And look after this little guy
04:05I had a feeling it wasn't going to be great
04:07When you described your daughter as wearing trousers
04:12That genuinely is the worst thing to happen to winter sports since Tonya Harding
04:16And much like Tonya Harding, the people next to you have got gammy legs
04:21I, uh, genuinely, obviously they've played that at ten times slower than it should have
04:26Uh, it was tough
04:27It's tough skiing
04:29Really?
04:30Have you ever put ski boots on?
04:31You can bet
04:31Well, it's wrong two people to ask that actually
04:33I've got on
04:34So, what is what you're about to say about the ski boots?
04:38Do you know what?
04:38It's tough to move your foot
04:42You should try driving in one
04:46But it wasn't only your feet that struggled at the altitude
04:49No
04:49I
04:50So, the altitude, the atmosphere changed my hair
04:54Genuinely, I just, I looked in the mirror
04:56Like, in an afternoon, I had this haircut
04:59Which I've never had
05:03The irony is
05:05It looks like a ski slope
05:08You know, I look like one of those Tories that's just moved to reform
05:14You know, like in the films when Shrek becomes human for a little bit
05:22We were trying to work out who you look like
05:23My first thought was this guy from the Winter Olympics
05:28But, no, I think this is the perfect look-alike
05:42So, that's our poll tonight
05:44Who do you think Josh looks like in that photo?
05:46What?
05:47Messages on Instagram with the hashtag Joshalike
05:50Or on WhatsApp using the number 07956175908
05:53Or you can scan the QR code on the screen
05:55You can also ask us any questions about the news
05:58Using the hashtag IsItOK?
06:00Look, let's not muck about
06:01Let's jump straight into the big story
06:03Emma said
06:04Is it OK that Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor has finally been arrested?
06:08Now
06:09At 9.55am yesterday
06:12The big story for this week's show
06:14Was going to be the upcoming by-election in Gorton and Denton
06:22That's the sound of a relieved crowd
06:28You should have heard the relieved co-hosts
06:31At 10am yesterday, it was announced that the Andrew formerly known as Prince
06:35Had been arrested at his Sandringham estate for misconduct in public office
06:38By 10.05, Gorton and Denton started to sound like Andrew's new cellmates
06:45Lads, is this the ultimate case of fuck around and find out?
06:50Well
06:50Sorry, I've never heard you say that phrase before
06:56Well, I mean
06:56Guys, is this a case of chat shit get banged, right?
07:03Let me throw it out there, right?
07:05This is
07:07Netflix and chill
07:08I've run out of them
07:11Um
07:11Well, yeah
07:12I mean, it must have been weird for him to see handcuffs that weren't fluffy
07:18But I genuinely
07:19When somebody said to me
07:22Andrew's been arrested
07:23And they'd have asked me
07:24What for?
07:26Misconduct in a public office wouldn't have been in my first 100 years
07:29I bet you even when they told him, he was like
07:32What, nothing else?
07:36If someone said to me
07:37What is misconduct in a public office?
07:39I go
07:39Has he photocopied his arms?
07:44Let's not rule it out
07:46Let's not rule it out
07:47He's ate someone's lunch in the fridge
07:49Police attended Andrew's estate at 8am yesterday
07:52And what we're calling
07:53It's a royal knock at the door
07:55Apparently you're up to 15 police in attendance
07:58In one car
08:00It's like clowns
08:02I bet you
08:03Before they went and done the arrest
08:05They were all sat there
08:06Just going to each other
08:06Tell you what
08:07I wonder who's going to play me in The Crown
08:12I mean, 15 seems heavy-handed
08:14But maybe they were just told
08:16They were visiting an estate
08:17To arrest an unemployed single dad
08:18With criminal connections
08:20What's worse for Andrew
08:21It was his 66th birthday
08:24I know
08:25Fee said
08:26Is it okay to wonder
08:26If he thought strippers
08:27Had been ordered for his birthday?
08:41He did he didn't know how to feel about it because he booked an escape room for his birthday
08:47This is harder than I thought
08:48All I've got is a bucket and a badge
08:51Do you reckon when he opened the door they still went, surprise?
08:55But this is the thing
08:56But this is the thing
08:57My thing is
08:57It's like
08:58I was wondering
08:59Does Andrew
09:00Does he have two birthdays?
09:02Like the king
09:03So they're not going to have to like go and arrest him again in June
09:07And go
09:07By the way
09:08This is your official arrest
09:10All of this raises so many questions
09:12Will there be a mug shot?
09:13If so
09:14Will he turn side on to make it look like a stamp?
09:18Will he be formally interviewed?
09:20If so
09:21Can it be by Emily Maitlis?
09:23Will he go to jail?
09:25If so
09:25Will he be serving at his brother's pleasure?
09:30And look
09:31Jail won't be too much of a stretch for Andrew
09:32Because he's used to arriving in a massive building
09:34And saying
09:35What wing will I be sleeping in?
09:37I bet
09:37I bet you he's watching Shawshank Redemption now
09:40Just planning
09:41To tunnel out behind a poster of a sloppy Giuseppe
09:45By the way
09:46Sloppy Giuseppe is not someone you want to meet in prison
09:51The Guardian reported that police have been assessing allegations
09:54That Andrew shared sensitive information
09:56With the billionaire child sex offender Jeffrey Epstein
09:58When he was a UK trade envoy
10:00Which makes me wonder
10:01Are we focusing on the wrong part of the sentence?
10:05Because surely the important words are
10:06With the billionaire child sex offender
10:09Not the other
10:10Hours after the arrest
10:11The King released a statement saying
10:12Quote
10:13I have learned with the deepest concern
10:15The news about Andrew Mountbatten Windsor
10:18I'm going to say it
10:19Any statement you issue about your brother
10:21In which you have to use his full name
10:22Is not a good statement
10:24He finished by saying
10:25Let me say clearly
10:26The law must take its course
10:28I thought it was interesting
10:29That the King didn't say
10:30The news about my brother
10:32Yeah
10:33I just surely
10:34I mean I'm sure he's thought this many times
10:37But especially this week
10:38King Charles must have sat there just going
10:40How was he mum's favourite?
10:51But this is what they
10:52This is the mad thing
10:53Because they've just changed his name
10:56And they're basically going
10:57Oh he's no longer associated with us
10:58But to be all serious
11:00Like the Queen and Prince Philip
11:03They put the money up
11:04For him to settle that case situation
11:07I don't know what the legal way to say that is Adam
11:09Yeah
11:10And then also the Queen's
11:11Who pushed for him to have this job
11:13And now basically
11:14The royals
11:15Want less to do with him
11:17Than Brooklyn does with his own parents
11:22Meanwhile the family of Virginia Giffray
11:24Released a statement saying
11:26Today our broken hearts have been lifted
11:27At the news that no one is above the law
11:29Not even royalty
11:30The statement ended with the phrase
11:31He was never a prince
11:32To survivors everywhere
11:34Virginia did this for you
11:35And look
11:36This may well be the first domino to fall
11:37In all of the rich and powerful men
11:39Named in the Epstein files
11:40But
11:40If Andrew is found guilty
11:42Let's hope he's not just a mascot
11:43Who takes the hit for everybody else
11:45Because
11:45It's very hard to believe
11:47That of all the people named in those files
11:49Andrew is the only person
11:51Who may have done anything wrong
11:53Ironically
11:53Andrew's sister Princess Anne
11:55Yesterday
11:55Visited a prison in Leeds
12:02Presumably to do a recce
12:05So if someone was to escape
12:07How would they do it?
12:13Exactly how high are these walls?
12:16She smuggled in some drugs
12:17So that he could trade them at a later date
12:21Andrew there's three grams of spice
12:22Under a light fitting
12:27There's a burner phone in the toilet system
12:30The king on the other hand
12:32Was at London Fashion Week yesterday
12:34This candid snap of him
12:36With Stella McCartney
12:37Looks like he was breaking
12:38The Andrew news to her
12:42In real time
12:43And you're not going to believe it
12:45It was his birthday
12:49He's going
12:50She's hidden spice in the light
12:53I'll tell you what though
12:54The king had a great day
12:56He said they're going
12:57I'll tell you what
12:58Andrew would have loved this
13:00He'd have loved this
13:01It's orange jumpsuits in this season
13:02He'd have been awesome
13:03The only way the king
13:04Could have had a better day
13:05At London Fashion Week
13:06Is if the fashion
13:07Had turned out to be big gloves
13:12He's asking Stella McCartney
13:13She could make a custom pair for
13:15Look it's got to be annoying
13:17For Andrew too
13:17Because he's just moved
13:18Into a new place
13:19He's probably signed
13:20A 12 month contract
13:21With Sky
13:22Plus who's going to look
13:23After his massive horse
13:40I love that even the horse
13:42Watch the distance themselves
13:46Social media obviously
13:47Went into overdrive
13:48And let's be honest
13:48It was only a matter of time
13:49Before someone did this
13:50Poignant drawing
13:57I've just got an image
13:58Of Paddington offering him cigarettes
14:01And Andrew pulling some
14:02Out of his arse
14:02Going no
14:03I keep mine in here
14:05For later
14:07And look
14:07Just when we thought yesterday
14:08That the story had no more
14:09Left to give
14:10Andrew was photographed
14:11In the back of the car
14:12As he left the police station
14:13You've all seen it
14:16In this now iconic image
14:21You know when you've accidentally
14:22Text someone
14:23That you're slagging off
14:27I think
14:28I know there's not much
14:29Praise given to Andrew
14:30But you've got to respect
14:31A man who drops
14:32Existency
14:33For a police interrogation
14:37The worst thing
14:38Was it was an Uber pool
14:41So far or not
14:42You've used the word
14:43Spice and ecstasy
14:44And I've never seen you
14:45More uncomfortable
14:47To be fair to Andrew
14:48People do say
14:49You end up looking
14:50Like your dad
14:56And look
14:57We've all been
14:57We've all been caught
14:58In awkward photos
14:59I mean like this one
15:00That was taken
15:00Of Josh and Alex
15:01Arriving at the studios
15:02Today
15:07That's the ecstasy
15:08In the spot
15:11The government
15:11The government
15:12Are now said
15:13To be considering
15:13Removing Andrew
15:14From the line of succession
15:15Because he's still
15:16Eighth in line
15:17To the throne
15:18Thing is though
15:19If he goes to prison
15:20And he's queuing for the bog
15:21He might only be
15:22Third in line
15:22For the throne
15:23So they say
15:24Can you imagine
15:26If he's in prison
15:27And king
15:28And the king's speech
15:30Is done
15:30With his one phone call
15:34And he's like
15:35I'm going to keep it short
15:36There's some really
15:37Scary guys behind me
15:43I've seen a few
15:44Anastasia
15:47Look if ever
15:48There was a chance
15:49That Andrew might be king
15:49It's now gone
15:50Like he's not going
15:51To get to live in a castle
15:52He's not going to
15:52Get to wear the crown
15:53He certainly won't
15:54Get to be on a stand
15:55So um
15:56We've made this one
15:57Up for him
16:02And look
16:03You know
16:04At the end of the day
16:04All of the
16:05Everything that went on yesterday
16:06He still missed out
16:08On his birthday
16:09Yeah
16:09He didn't get to
16:09Celebrate his birthday
16:10He got home
16:11At like
16:11You know
16:11After 11 hours
16:12I'm sure they weren't
16:13Celebrating then
16:13No exactly
16:14So we thought
16:15We'd do something for him
16:16Like obviously
16:17All of this broke yesterday
16:18We haven't had a lot of time
16:19To get a cake together
16:19But we've managed
16:20To get a cake together
16:21For him
16:21And I'm just hearing
16:22From our producers
16:23That it has just arrived
16:24So let's bring out the cake
16:27And let's sing
16:30For he's a pervy old fellow
16:33For he's a pervy old fellow
16:36For he's a pervy old fellow
16:41And so say all of us
16:43I think we need to be quicker
16:44So say all of us
16:46So say all of us
16:48For he's a pervy old fellow
16:50For he's a pervy old fellow
16:52For he's a pervy old fellow
16:55Stop, I need to say this last bit.
16:57Subject to what happens in court.
17:06Um...
17:06There you go.
17:07Thanks for you.
17:09Thanks, Fergie.
17:10Good luck with the new job.
17:15All right, let's bring out tonight's guests.
17:16Two comedians who are making their first appearance on The Last Leg,
17:19and boy, have they chosen the right week to do it.
17:21Please welcome Bridget Christie and Chloe Petz.
17:34All right?
17:35Hello, mate.
17:36Hello.
17:37Happy Prince Andrew Arrest Day!
17:40Happy Prince Andrew Arrest Day!
17:43Happy...
17:43Happy...
17:48Happy Prince Andrew Arrest Day!
17:50Happy Prince Andrew Arrest Day, everyone.
17:52Normally we don't all hump as, it's a special occasion.
17:55Look, obviously the big question is, first question is, have you ever had a disappointing
17:59birthday?
18:01Um, well, I've never been arrested for sharing trade secrets with a known paedophile whilst
18:06in public office, if that's what you're implying.
18:10I've only had good birthdays, so my last birthday I went to Disneyland, and on my birthday I did like
18:16a character brunch breakfast, and I was a bit nervous because Captain Hook's there and he was obviously a bit
18:21of a wrong one, but then I was thinking that's, that's kind of thematically relevant, because he had his own
18:26dealings with the underage on an island.
18:28LAUGHTER
18:31LAUGHTER
18:31So, you heard it here first, Captain Hook is on the Epstein files.
18:35LAUGHTER
18:36Hey, hey, hey, don't have a go at the disabled on this show.
18:39LAUGHTER
18:41Fine, allegedly.
18:42LAUGHTER
18:44I had my 30th in a Wetherspoons, and I got there before everyone else, and everyone was two hours late,
18:53so I was just on my own.
18:54Oh.
18:55LAUGHTER
18:55Very depressing.
18:57Wow.
18:59LAUGHTER
18:59Even Andrew went, oh.
19:01LAUGHTER
19:03Now, Chloe, you're on tour at the moment, and I bring that up for a couple of reasons, one, to
19:08let everyone know you're on tour, but also because your tour poster, on your tour poster, your hair looks remarkably
19:12like Josh's from earlier on in the show.
19:16LAUGHTER
19:17LAUGHTER
19:20Every...
19:21APPLAUSE
19:22You were at altitude as well.
19:25APPLAUSE
19:27Everyone was, um...
19:28Yeah, everyone was very surprised by Josh's haircut, but it's just a classic lesbian haircut.
19:33LAUGHTER
19:34I would...
19:35I would urge you not to go to East London with your hair like that, or a lot of ladies
19:39that look like me will try and kiss you on the lips.
19:41LAUGHTER
19:42Be very careful.
19:43And why am I not going?
19:45LAUGHTER
19:46You do dress like a lesbian, Josh.
19:48You what, sorry?
19:49You dress like a lesbian.
19:50LAUGHTER
19:52LAUGHTER
19:53I've...
19:53I've got to be clear on this, I do fail one of the key criteria.
19:56LAUGHTER
19:58Which is...
20:00Well...
20:00LAUGHTER
20:02I'm a man.
20:03I'm a man.
20:05I'm a man.
20:05You fancy women, that's close enough.
20:07Yeah.
20:07Yeah.
20:08You've brought along a lookalike of Josh, though.
20:11Well, I've met a lot of horses that...
20:13LAUGHTER
20:16You what?
20:16Have we got a photo?
20:17I think you've got a...
20:19LAUGHTER
20:22Yeah, I can see it.
20:23I can see it.
20:24Shall we get her back on to Prince Andrew?
20:27LAUGHTER
20:29You've copped it more than him tonight.
20:31LAUGHTER
20:31Look, it's been a bit of deja vu for us, uh, this week,
20:34cos it was only a few weeks ago,
20:36we wrote a song to Farewell Peter Mandelson
20:38for his association with Jeffrey Epstein.
20:40And, look, here we are tonight, doing the same for Andrew.
20:42So, much like Westlife did for Barry Manilow,
20:45we're repurposing the same song, uh,
20:47with a slightly different twist.
20:48So, to do that, over to you, Charlie Baker.
20:52APPLAUSE
21:00Being entitled all your life
21:05Lovely house, two kids, a wife
21:09But you were brought undone
21:11Cos you had a weird response
21:13When Maitlis asked why
21:15You were friends with a nonce
21:1866 just yesterday
21:22But this year there'll be no soiree
21:27Not so long ago
21:29You were perving at G-strings
21:32Now you might go down
21:34And you're serving on D-Wing
21:36Oh, Andy
21:38Well, they came and they ruined your birthday
21:42And they took you away
21:45Oh, Andy
21:47Well, who would you want as a cellmate
21:52Perhaps you could bonk with Mandy
22:08We'll have more last week for you after the break
22:09We'll weigh in on the social media ban
22:12We'll check in on the Winter Olympics
22:13And we'll make a prediction for Gorton and Denton
22:14Plus, we want to know
22:15Who does Josh look like in this photo?
22:17Message us on WhatsApp or Instagram
22:19Use the hashtag Joshalike
22:20We'll see you in a little bit
22:36Welcome back to Last Leg
22:37We're filmed by Bridget Christie and Chloe Petz
22:39We didn't get to ask you about Prince Andrew
22:42About what you've made of it all this week
22:43Oh
22:44Andrew, sorry, Andrew
22:45Well, I mean, I think you do have to look at the parents
22:49No, because if you look at all these men
22:53They're egomaniacs and they have a sense of entitlement
22:56And I don't think that just comes in adulthood
22:58Yeah
22:59And I think that
23:00I do
23:00I think we're too easy on little boys
23:03I think we need to be much harder on them
23:06Yeah
23:07Crueler
23:09So that they feel less good about themselves
23:11I mean, I'm convinced
23:12No, it's true
23:13Honestly, I was at a birthday party the other day
23:15Yeah
23:16And it was my friend's eight-year-old daughter
23:20And it was time for the cake
23:22And then her little brother came out
23:23He was about three
23:25Well, and I'm sorry about this
23:26It's not very nice
23:27But he came out holding a poo on a plate
23:30Oh
23:31Disgusting
23:31I thought, oh, the shit's going to hit the fan here
23:34Anyway
23:35And they'd have an argument that morning
23:37He starts singing
23:38Also, he wasn't dressed properly
23:40So there was only two candles in it as well
23:43And she was eight
23:44I mean, what a loser
23:45Anyway
23:47And then he sings her this song
23:48Happy birthday to you
23:49I've made you up
23:50Who I know it's disgusting
23:51But I hate you too
23:52Oh
23:53Horrendous
23:54Awful
23:54And he wasn't
23:55And also, I've got a bee in my bonnet
23:57About
23:57I don't understand why we make allowances
23:59For little children's bad behaviour
24:01And old people's bad behaviour
24:04So like, oh, he's only three
24:06I know he's brought in a poo on a plate
24:07But he's only three
24:08And I know granny's racist
24:09But she's 90
24:10I mean
24:12No, but it's true
24:15Why do we do that?
24:18It's crazy
24:20And also
24:22I'm 54
24:22And I'm not allowed to put on a plate
24:24And be racist at a party
24:26Am I?
24:27I found that out the hard way
24:30But my point is
24:32My point is
24:34That the mum
24:35I thought the mum
24:35Was going to go mad about it
24:37But she didn't
24:37She just went
24:38Oh dear
24:39Shall we put that in the toilet
24:40Where it belongs?
24:41I've forgotten his name
24:42I'm so traumatised by it
24:43Adolf probably
24:44Anyway
24:45And I was like
24:46Oh, this is awful
24:47And I don't think she would have been
24:48If it was a little girl
24:50I think she would have been
24:50Much harder
24:52On the girl
24:52Because we encourage girls
24:53To be caring
24:54And nice
24:55And nurturing
24:55We don't
24:56And I think it is precisely
24:58Because we tolerate
24:59Little boys
25:00Pooing on plates
25:01At their big sisters birthday parties
25:03That Donald Trump
25:04Is the president
25:05Of the United States
25:17And that Andrew's
25:18Incredible
25:18Andrew's gotten away with it
25:19I mean it starts
25:20I think it must have started when he was little
25:22Your thoughts?
25:22Um
25:23I just liked that it happened on his birthday
25:27Because I'm pretty sure that the arresting officer must have been a gay man
25:32Right
25:33To have that level of drama and chaos
25:37Just sat round in the briefing like
25:39We shouldn't do it on his birthday should we?
25:41Yeah
25:43And then they definitely plan to get one of those big cakes
25:47Right
25:47And then the arresting officer will jump out of it and be like
25:50Come on Prince you're going to the slammer
25:54Alright let's move on to other news now
25:56And there has been other news apparently
25:59The boss of Meta Mark Zuckerberg was in court in America this week
26:03To answer claims that social media platforms are engineered to exploit young people's brains
26:07Do we think social media apps have affected our brains?
26:11Leave a comment below
26:14Uh yeah 100%
26:17I personally can't get TikTok because I know that it would absolutely take over my life
26:22And the good thing for me about not having TikTok is it gives me loads of time to go on
26:27Instagram Reels
26:31But I think the thing about me is it kind of doesn't matter if I get rid of the apps
26:35anyway
26:35It's the phone that I'm addicted to
26:37Yeah
26:37Because if I didn't have like Instagram or TikTok I'd just be sat there like scrolling the Tesco club card
26:42app
26:42I did this I genuinely I locked off you can get this thing where you locked off all my distracting
26:48apps
26:49And then I found myself bored on a train I was like I wonder which town has Uber
26:56So I just went on my Uber app and typed in different towns to see if it worked and I
27:01was like I am addicted to this
27:03So there's talk of a social media ban for children under 16 how do we feel about that?
27:08Definitely I would do that because it affect genuinely to be serious
27:13It you can feel it yourself. It affects you. I've never gone on social media and left feeling happier
27:20I always feel worse. I feel more antsy. I feel more anxious. Do you disagree Bridget?
27:25I'm sorry. I think that any parent
27:28I think that if you've got children you want them to be on social media even more because it means
27:34that you don't have to talk to them as much
27:45I think they should be on it more
27:48I think all these politicians say no, we've got a banner. They obviously don't spend any time with their children
27:52at all
27:54Okay, over Christmas my daughter made me a pasta dish that from a recipe from tik-tok and then played
28:01me a labby sifre song that had gone viral on Instagram
28:04Yeah, and I was eating this amazing dinner listening to the music going social media is awesome. Yeah, but like
28:10recipes and music existed before social media
28:20All right, let's move on to the Winter Olympics now as GB racked up their third gold medal last night
28:25GB's curlers made it through to the final which will take place tomorrow. They're going to take on Canada
28:30Geocast said is it okay that the most badass thing about Canada is that they're cheating at curling
28:37So this week the Swedish curling team accused the Canadian team of double touching the stone which sounds very much
28:43like an Australian euphemism for ruining the toilet
28:47Oh mate, I think I just double touch the stone
28:51Didn't Prince Andrew double touch the stone?
28:54The Canadian athlete was accused of letting go of the stone then giving it a tiny extra flick with his
28:59finger which is not allowed
29:01His response was to tell the Swedish curler to and I quote fuck off
29:06I know
29:07It's the most exciting thing to happen to curling
29:10I mean
29:14Who would have thought the great rivalry of our times would be between the firebrands of Sweden and Canada?
29:19I I love the fact that somebody told someone else to fuck off while they're both holding brooms
29:27But what this is why I mean you don't you
29:30Canada you don't want to mess with Sweden because you know now all the flat-packed furniture that's getting sent
29:37to Canada
29:37That's going to have one screw missing
29:39Yeah
29:42How did World War Three start and you go well it's between Canada and Sweden
29:48Oh should you start the bombing first?
29:52Oh no after you eh?
29:54Finally Chinese skier Eileen
29:56Is this your audition tape?
29:59For Hello Hello
30:02Finally Chinese skier Eileen Gu gave one of the best answers of all time at the Winter Olympics to a
30:07journalist this week who asked whether her two silver medals could be seen as a loss
30:12Do you see these as two silvers gained or two goals lost?
30:19I'm the most decorated free skier, female free skier in history. I think that's an answer in and of itself
30:24Um
30:26How do I say this?
30:28Winning a medal at the Olympics is a life-changing experience for every athlete
30:33Doing it five times is exponentially harder because every medal is equally hard for me
30:39But everybody else's expectations rise, right?
30:42And so the two medals lost situation
30:46To be quite frank with you, I think is kind of a ridiculous perspective to take
30:50Um, I'm showcasing my best skiing
30:53I'm doing things that quite literally have never been done before
30:56And so I think that is more than good enough
30:59But thank you
31:02Yes!
31:03Yes!
31:05And Phil
31:08Me and you
31:10How many times have we had the conversation?
31:13You know, do we see it as a foot lost or a silver one gained?
31:19You were fired up by that, Chloe?
31:21Yeah, absolutely
31:22That was astounding
31:23And that was her like under the intense pressure of media scrutiny
31:27Like that was so eloquent and beautiful
31:29Big up her
31:30Also, Eileen Gu is one of the highest paid female athletes on the planet
31:35She won two silvers in skiing and gold in the freestyle verbal smackdown
31:40As I mentioned earlier, the big story of the week was going to be the Gorton and Denton by-election
31:44It does take place next Thursday
31:46And is being seen as a massive test for Keir Starmer's leadership
31:49We should have the results of the by-election for you next Friday
31:51Unless another royal is arrested
31:53But...
31:57I have to cross fingers using two hands
32:03This week though, we thought we'd try to predict the winner of what you called the Mancunian candidate
32:16Now, we've taken our inspiration from the Winter Olympics for this predictor
32:21And just genuinely people accuse us of bias no matter what it is that we're doing
32:26So this week, Josh and Alex will randomly choose helmets to put on our skiers
32:31Each helmet will represent a different party
32:33We are doing this clearly, fairly and above board
32:36Just like FIFA
32:38We've got 11 candidates up there
32:40Alex, pull out a helmet, I'll tell you which candidate and party it's for
32:44Happily, this is the Conservative Party
32:48The Conservative Party, their candidate is Charlotte Cadden
32:51She spent 30 years as a police officer, so she's used to dressing in blue
32:55This is the Communist League
32:58The Communist League
32:59The candidate is Hugo Wills
33:01They are an exceedingly left-wing political party
33:03And not, as I thought, a supergroup made up of members of the Communards and Human League
33:08The Social Democratic Party
33:11Social Democratic Party, the SDP, Sebastian Moore
33:14Volunteers at a food bank and at 29 is a millennial
33:17Which means if you don't vote for him, he'll say it's totes cringe
33:21Rejoin EU
33:22Rejoin EU
33:23Joseph Omar from the Rejoin EU Party
33:27Wonder what their policies are
33:29I guess we'll never know
33:31Oh, the Green Party
33:33Sorry, I broke the hat
33:34Oh, the hat's broken
33:35Green Party, it's Hannah Spencer
33:36That's because it's not been made from good plastic
33:41She's a police officer
33:42No, she's a plumber by trade, so let's hope she can end the leaks in Westminster
33:46Reform
33:47Reform
33:49Matt Goodwin, former GB News presenter who ate his own book live on air after losing a bet
33:53And it's not the only time words have come out of his ass
33:58Advance UK
34:00Nick Buckley is a candidate
34:01I don't know much about him, but he's got a subheading on his Wikipedia page that says
34:04And I quote, views about women
34:08Draw your own
34:09Libertarian
34:10Libertarian
34:11That is Dan Clark is against digital ID cards and wants to roll back the arm of the state
34:15Just like Andrew Mountbatten-Winsor, but for very different reasons
34:19Labour
34:20The candidate is Angeliki Stoyer
34:23She's a Labour candidate, or as she's known in Manchester, can't believe it's not Burnham
34:28Liberal Democrats
34:30Jackie Peercy, a normal competent woman who's lived in the area for years
34:34So she's not going to win
34:36We're finding a monster raving loony party
34:38Monster raving loony party
34:42Their candidate is Sir Oinkalot
34:46Whose slogan is genuinely
34:47Think big, vote pig
34:50Alright, I'm going to count down
34:52I'm going to ask you to lift the barrier
34:54And the winner will be the skier who goes the furthest once they get off the edge
34:58I'm glad you're asking me to do this on live TV
35:00That's great
35:00Three, two, one, go
35:03Woah
35:04Woah
35:04And it
35:06I'm going to say
35:08Oh my god
35:10Is you okay?
35:10Yeah, I'm fine
35:12Oh my god
35:13It's number two
35:15I fell off
35:17I was so excited I fell off
35:32So according to our poll, the libertarian candidate Dan Clark is going to win Gordon and Benson
35:40Best episode ever
35:41Best episode ever
35:42Best episode ever
35:42Best episode ever
35:48You know what?
35:50I'm better on the ski slopes
35:5314 years waiting for you to get a limp
35:57We'll have our last link for you after the break
35:59We'll ask whether aliens are real
36:00We'll meet this week's mystery guest
36:02And we'll find out if Josh is okay
36:04Plus we want to know who does he look like in this photo
36:06Message us on WhatsApp
36:07Are you okay?
36:08Oh my god
36:08You've torn through your jeans
36:10Oh no!
36:13Hashtag at Joshalike
36:14We'll see you in a bit
36:28Welcome back to The Last Leg
36:30We're joined by Bridget Christie and Chloe Petz
36:32We've asked you tonight who Josh looks like in this photo
36:36Andy said
36:37My dog
36:44Can we add the RSPCA to that please?
36:47Johnny said Claire Balding
36:52And Hallie said
36:53This llama
37:03Alright, back to the news
37:04Is it okay that Barack Obama said aliens are real this week?
37:09I don't know if you've seen this
37:10He was answering quick fire questions on the podcast
37:12And he gave this intriguing answer
37:15Are aliens real?
37:18They're real but I haven't seen them
37:20And they're not being kept in
37:24Area 51
37:25There's no underground
37:26Facility
37:28Unless there's this enormous conspiracy
37:31And they hid it from the President of the United States
37:36What about Area 52?
37:40So he knows they're real
37:42Yep
37:42But he hasn't seen them
37:43Yep
37:44The only explanation for that
37:45Is a blind date kind of scenario
37:47Where he's sat there
37:49There's three aliens on the other side of the screen
37:50And he's just asking them questions
37:53He never picked one because they kept coming out with all sorts of innuendo
37:59So
37:59Obama later issued a statement saying
38:01Statistically the universe is so vast that the odds are good there's life out there
38:04But the distances between solar systems are so great that the chances we've been visited by aliens is low
38:09And I saw no evidence during my presidency that extraterrestrials have made contact with us
38:14I think if President Obama had revealed aliens were real and we were putting it in part three
38:22Yeah
38:23That would show quite how much we do want to talk about Prince Andrew
38:27I also think that if aliens were real we would know by now because Trump would have told us
38:32Right?
38:33I mean like the aliens are real and they find me very attractive
38:38But funnily enough, overnight Donald Trump announced he's now going to direct the defence departments
38:42To release government files relating to the existence of UFOs and aliens
38:46Oh, for all the Epstein files? Come on man
38:49Yeah, but wait till you find out that there's a leak in it and Prince Andrew's been feeding secrets to
38:55the aliens
38:58Thingy, I mean
38:59Will he be redacting any aliens in those files?
39:06Look, it's been a big year for conspiracy theorists
39:09First it's revealed the world is being run by a cabal of pedophiles
39:12Now it turns out there might be aliens as well
39:15I mean next week we'll be interviewing the Loch Ness Monster and hear the new song from Tupac
39:21Alright, it's time to bring on this week's mystery guest
39:23Bridget and Chloe have to work out how they're connected to the news
39:25Can we have the mystery guest please?
39:30Mysterious guest
39:40Okay, so who is the mystery guest?
39:42This is Brenda. Brenda was in the news this week
39:45But the question is why? Can we have the dramatic lighting change please?
39:51Was Brenda in the news? Because
39:53A. She was reunited with her prosthetic leg ten months after losing it in the sea
39:58Because it finally washed up on a beach in East Yorkshire
40:01Was it? Because she was reunited with her prosthetic leg ten months after checking it into the cloakroom at the
40:07O2 arena
40:08And losing her ticket she eventually found the ticket in a pocket and they returned the leg
40:14Or is it? Because see she was reunited with her prosthetic leg ten months after picking up someone else's in
40:21the changing rooms of a disabled line dancing session
40:24Eventually she found the person in a leg amnesty
40:28Okay
40:28A leg amnesty
40:30A leg amnesty
40:30A leg amnesty
40:31Do you not think that's a real thing?
40:33Have you been on this show before Chloe?
40:36The green room is a leg amnesty at the end
40:39Or sometimes we just all put them in a bowl
40:46I do like the idea of a leg amnesty box
40:49I think I think whatever happens we know that Brenda is a messy as fuck
40:55That is cool
40:56Yeah
40:57Wow
40:57Okay
40:58Oh
40:59Should we ask some questions?
41:01Well just
41:01We have time
41:02Well what was the concert?
41:06Okay
41:08We'll reveal the mystery guys
41:10Get out Brenda, what's the point?
41:12Sorry, sorry
41:13And we'll unveil a song for her as well
41:15Plus Josh will wrap up the last seven days
41:16We'll see you in a little bit
41:30Welcome back to The Last Leg
41:31We're joined by Bridget Christie and Chloe Petz
41:33Now before the break we challenged them to work out how this person was connected to the news
41:37Can we have the options again please?
41:40So was Brenda A reunited with her prosthetic leg after losing it in the sea and it finally washed up
41:46on a beach in East Yorkshire
41:48What she reunited with her prosthetic leg after checking it into the cloakroom at the O2 arena and losing her
41:53ticket
41:53She eventually found it and they returned the leg
41:55What she reunited with her prosthetic leg ten months after picking up someone else's in the changing rooms of a
42:00disabled line dancing session
42:02And she found it in a leg amnesty
42:04What are your thoughts?
42:06I wish it was all three
42:07But we think it is
42:09Lost at sea
42:10Lost at sea
42:32How?
42:33How?
42:34We all want to know how?
42:36Okay
42:36On my bucket list was to have a swim in the sea before I was 70
42:42So I joined the flamborough flippers and decided I was going to have this first dip with them for safety
42:49reasons
42:50Obviously
42:51I had a sea leg
42:53Don't laugh
42:54I had a sea leg on
42:55So you can just go to the water
42:58You're not supposed to actually swim with it
43:00You're supposed to just get there
43:01Take it off and then swim on
43:04Yeah
43:05Unfortunately they wanted photographs
43:06So we stood along
43:08Had a photograph done
43:10And at the last minute a big wave come and knocked me over
43:14And I fell backwards
43:15Leg went
43:17Off
43:18On its travels
43:19I fell on the floor
43:21But did nobody try and get the leg for you?
43:25Um
43:25Somebody apparently saw a leg
43:28Yeah
43:28But couldn't
43:30But couldn't actually get hold of it in time
43:33Because the wave was
43:35Took it off
43:36That's a shit lifeguard
43:37That's
43:38That is
43:38So you got the leg off the leg
43:40You'd forgotten about it
43:41Then what happened?
43:42Oh
43:42Ten months had gone by
43:44And I'd forgotten about it
43:45And thought
43:45Well I'm never gonna go to see it again
43:47Just thought I'd never see it again
43:49And then a fossil hunter
43:52Found it
43:54Ten months later
43:55And posted it on Facebook
43:57And one of the flamborough flippers
44:01Noticed it and remembered me
44:03And said
44:04Must be hers
44:05And they sent this
44:07They sent me a picture of this leg
44:10Embedded in clay
44:12And the fossil hunter dug it out
44:14In clay?
44:14Yeah, it was like in
44:15In like this bottom of the hill
44:18It was like just embedded in clay
44:19Your leg was in a cliff?
44:21Yeah in a cliff
44:22Yeah in a cliff
44:23It wasn't in a bottle
44:24It was a message
44:25It wasn't in a bottle
44:27It wasn't in a bottle
44:27No, it was in a cliff
44:28It was like washed up so hard
44:30Yeah
44:30It embedded itself in some clay
44:32Is the leg like
44:34Is it usable
44:35Is it?
44:36Probably
44:36Yeah
44:37Of course
44:37Is it like a shell
44:39Where if you put your ear to it
44:41You can hear the sea?
45:02I don't know
45:02Please thank Brenda
45:03Thanks very much
45:05Thank you
45:06Thank you
45:06Well done Brenda
45:11All right
45:12Very briefly
45:13We ask you who you think
45:14Josh looks like in this photo
45:16Ollie said
45:17A young Alan Bennett
45:20Katie said
45:21Princess Diana
45:24Kelly said
45:25Kelly said
45:26Gail Platt
45:31And Alex's mum
45:33Elaine Brooker said
45:34Peter Mandelson
45:40Jesus Christ mum
45:42All right
45:43We are about to end the show
45:45With a song about
45:45Brenda's prosthetic leg
45:46That was returned after
45:4710 months at sea
45:48But before we do
45:50Would you please thank our guests
45:51Bridget Christie
45:53And Chloe Petz
45:57And my co-host Josh Whittacam
45:59And Alex Brooker
46:02We'll be back next week
46:04With comedians
46:04Jason Manford
46:05Bella Hull
46:06And Lou Sanders
46:07Right now though
46:08We'd like to leave you with a song
46:09We wrote about
46:09Brenda Ogden's prosthetic leg
46:11That was discovered
46:12In a cliff last week
46:14After 10 months at sea
46:16And with Wuthering Heights
46:17Topping the box office
46:18We asked Kate Bush tribute act
46:20Moments of Pleasure
46:20To help us out
46:21Thanks for watching The Last Leg
46:23My name's Adam Hills
46:24See you next week
46:24For the next leg
46:46Thank you for the next leg
46:54You're attached to you
46:56I'm waterproof
46:57I'm waterproof
46:59I'm waterproof
47:00Day turned into night
47:02You went home
47:05When I was bobbing
47:06Out of sight
47:07You left behind
47:09Your withering
47:10Withering
47:11Withering
47:12Withering
47:12Stump in the cliff
47:13It's me, where's your knee, I've come home
47:17I'm so cold, shut me under your leg now
47:24In the cliff
47:25It's me, where's your knee, I've come home
47:29I'm so cold, shut me under your leg now
47:46I'm so cold, shut me under your leg now
Comments