- 13 hours ago
High Hoops - Season 2 - Episode 04: The Two Queens Zone
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00:00MUSIC
00:18CHOP, CHOP, CHOP, CHOP, CHOP, CHOP, CHOP
00:22OK, so this might take a bit of explaining.
00:30but it's gonna have to be quick
00:36sorry about this
00:39here comes the rewind
00:45so me and jess are currently having a free throw comp
00:48just a bit of fun that i absolutely must win
00:57oh yeah that's five all mifa next one to miss loses stay at the obvious much
01:04yes i do nyla now i'm going to score
01:10now ether will miss and lose the bet we made ether what bet how about whichever team loses
01:20has to change their team's name to the losers for a whole week
01:28hurry up and lose mifa like i'm gonna miss
01:50so now everyone's calling us the losers and there's nothing we can do about it
01:55you kids exaggerate a billion times a day i'm sure it's not everyone
02:08at least it's just for a week but what if it sticks it took ages for the vipers to put
02:14respect
02:14on our names and now it's gone thanks to jessica and me i suppose but i just need to smash
02:22this
02:22loser tag this jessica and his eggs if it's a fight you're after we've got a battle reenactment
02:30as part of interactive history week no thanks sounds well weird there is nothing weird about
02:36playing a historical character in full costume to educate your fellow students it's like you can't
02:42see himself your brother is using his big history brain to play the queen's special little advisor
02:48just special advisor mum stop adding little the lads think it sounds daft but they'll change their tune
02:55when they see my venetian breeches think i'll wear my own breeches thank you i'm awesome being myself
03:03yourself yourself you mean a loser
03:08sign up will you love not many people have and jim's nervous because mr holt's on holiday and left
03:14him in charge you'll be the boss of everyone if you play queen victoria victoria jim this whole week's
03:21about queen elizabeth the first who's he oh no connor lecturing coming elizabeth the first ruled over
03:28this country's golden age she inspired my sweet threads revitalized art and literature her ships
03:35defeated the mighty spanish armada in an epic battle this could go on for a while she kept her own
03:42cousin mary queen of scots prisoner for 18 years which seems harsh but family can be annoying rude
03:53but she does sound like a legend and this boaty battle thingy that's on friday yeah thursday jim we're
04:02recreating queen elizabeth's epic victory on the playing fields so this queen elizabeth person gets
04:10to be connor's boss have their own captive and win a battle in front of the entire school
04:16the vipers are winners say it
04:29sign me up jim i'm playing a queen
04:34um which queen was that again you know what connor said the prison one with the cousin
04:42oh and make sure there's a jail cell and that jessica plays the other cousin
04:47of her cousin right
05:00i can play that thing with my nose you know that's gross the queen commands the following
05:06students take part in history week please don't hang up please don't hang up please don't hang up
05:10please don't hang up clang up clang up what i said please and ben
05:15everyone wants a bit of ben
05:21i thought we'd be happy i got you out of lessons not when you have us pushing an actual pretend
05:25well
05:25which i notice you're not doing uh william cecil doesn't do manual labor
05:31who my incredibly high achieving character let's just pretend not this week it's not the whole point
05:38of interactive learning is living like it's real don't you want to win the battle for your queen
05:44to recreate the sights the sounds the smells smells oh and that job smells isn't a job
05:52clang it revise queenie to make it one then oh make us king while you're at it
05:57she didn't have a king prince then my hair's too good to be anything less
06:04if i do this you two take part
06:08and admit that history and by association me are very cool
06:16i'm taking that as a yes
06:20ta-da
06:23bow before your queen
06:24first job bowing lessons for everyone
06:27i've been called a loser 15 times today
06:30twice by teachers
06:32all thanks to you
06:34thanks to your majesty
06:35actually
06:37Aoife your stupid bet could mean we're known as the losers forever
06:41we won't
06:42watch this
06:43boy
06:45your queen requires fizzy drinks
06:52that was impressive
06:54that's nothing
06:55chair girl
06:57i wish to sit down
07:01i forgot i sent chair girl to go get more chairs
07:04my point is
07:06everyone has to do what the queen says this week
07:08ultimate girl boss
07:10exactly
07:10so when i and my royal teamies win the battle it'll be like the loser thing never even happened
07:17in a way
07:19we'll all be queens
07:21yes queen
07:22but only me though
07:24technically
07:27so
07:28what do we do then
07:30i'm so glad she asked
07:34nyla with your no-nonsense toughness
07:37your queen commands you to be chief jailer
07:40an executioner
07:41an executioner
07:43one jail your majesty
07:46where's my executioner's weapons
07:49weapons weapons
07:50a toilet brush
07:53you do have an axe but i lost it
07:55i'll find it don't rush me
07:58and char
07:59your wicked style makes you a perfect lady-in-waiting
08:03this dress would look adobe on you
08:06and hide your mossy feet
08:08she's right
08:10they're enormous
08:13zara
08:13you'll be designing and making ships
08:16for the battle
08:17because of my keen interest in naval warfare
08:19my design credentials
08:21my geometry scores
08:24yeah
08:25all of that
08:28it was the only job left wasn't it
08:31oh and she'd make some stocks
08:34ready for when we chop jessica's head off
08:40ifa
08:42why are all the clothes with your name on so
08:46raggedy
08:47jim
08:48who's mary queen of scots
08:51the one you wanted to play
08:52the queen with the cousin
08:54the prison
08:55one
08:57who
08:58i explained this
09:01queen elizabeth had a scottish cousin
09:03mary queen of scots
09:04who wanted to be queen of england too
09:06so elizabeth threw her in jail
09:09and she was never let out
09:11never
09:13so i've gone from being the queen of winning everything
09:16to being stuck in that thing all week
09:18no no no of course not
09:20you get beheaded on wednesday
09:23headless is a bold look
09:25but i can work with it
09:27the battle's on thursday
09:28how am i supposed to beat spain without a head
09:31you won't
09:32whoever's playing queen elizabeth
09:34will
09:35the queen with the cousin
09:43oh mefa
09:45the bars really suit you
09:46knowingly she's right
09:48i'm totally pulling this off
09:49i wasn't going to get involved
09:51but then jim said how much you wanted me to play your cousin
09:54oh great
09:55it's my fault
09:56again
09:56how could i refuse such a kind offer from my favourite loser
10:01you're still our queen
10:02actually losers
10:04i'm the queen you work for
10:05and i've got lots of work for you to do
10:07so you'll be coming with me
10:09take her away jailer
10:10do i have to
10:11um your majesty
10:15yes please
10:16find my axe
10:18enjoy it while it lasts
10:20because i'm totally not taking this lying down
10:22what
10:24kind of think you are
10:26cuz
10:27would this be any more humiliating
10:33turns out the answer was a very soggy yes
10:39says here mary queen of scots
10:41was well treated in prison
10:45the queen thought throwing wet sponges at her would be more fun
10:49she was right
10:50great work gang
10:54they literally never miss
10:56how big must my face be
11:08are we allowed to be in mr holt's office
11:11i can go where i please because i am queen
11:15of course
11:16my uh my apologies your majesty
11:18what do you want from me
11:20a favor your majesty
11:23if you could make my friend ben royalty
11:25that would mean a lot to me personally
11:29and i have been a loyal servant for many years
11:32and you are
11:34william cecil
11:35your special advisor
11:38fine
11:38tell jim to make ben king of spain
11:41he can lose the battle to me
11:43small detail
11:44the spanish king wasn't actually at the battle
11:47it looks better if i beat the king
11:49so make that happen
11:50okay
11:51tell him to cry when he loses
11:54that's not historically accurate
11:57isn't it your job to do whatever your queen demands
11:59well yes yes your majesty
12:04good then stand on one leg
12:13now flap your arms like a swan
12:18but make a noise like a cow
12:26i'm going to enjoy this
12:27i don't suppose now would be a good time to ask you to appoint a minister of smells
12:32i mean
12:35i mean
12:41where are you going in such a hurry
12:43to resign from my exalted position as special advisor for a majesty
12:47you
12:47same thing
12:48just way less nerdy
12:49there they are
12:51my two saviors
12:52so about that jim
12:54i'm trying to save the viper's reputation
12:56i thought this would be a disaster
12:57but you got so many people involved
12:59i feel like i should be paying you
13:00i can't know
13:01because i'm saving up for a new gold tracksuit
13:04that's great
13:05jim but
13:06yeah but listen
13:07mr holt will be well impressed if i pull this off
13:09and so will i
13:10yes
13:11we can't resign now
13:13he seems so
13:15happy
13:15like clangor with a mouldy potato
13:18oi jails can't move
13:19ow
13:20do you have to be so rough
13:22if i'm going to play a character
13:24might as well commit to it
13:25well that's just given me a wee beastie of an idea
13:32king of spain
13:34you're not happy
13:35not
13:36which is spanish
13:38for no
13:39you wanted to be royalty
13:41well obviously
13:42i'm fluent in spanglish
13:44and handsome enough
13:46you still have a better job than clangor
13:49yeah
14:09you did this to me
14:16my loyal subject
14:18as you know
14:19i am the best queen that ever lived
14:22you may now applaud
14:25please
14:27please
14:27take this opportunity to learn more about how incredible i am
14:31how brilliant life was
14:33because of me
14:34and make sure to book your tickets for this battle with the spanish armada
14:38join us live
14:39for the naval takedown of the 16th century
14:42when queen elizabeth's english fleet takes on the mighty spanish armada
14:47which i will win
14:49for you
14:50my loyal subjects
15:05i love a good bagpipe
15:11is anyone hungry
15:13cause you're talking
15:14pure mints by the way
15:17guards
15:18seize her
15:19and take me well
15:20i'm already in jail you're dozy wheelers are queen
15:25she has a point you much
15:27you can tell who's got the brains in this family eh
15:31silence
15:31i order you to
15:34freedom
15:37you two
15:38come with me
15:45being this
15:46i'm wearing my own hair from now on
15:48but the real queen's hair was burnt amber
15:50with a hint of orangutan
15:52i'm the real queen
15:53you're the losers
15:55and you can find me better clothes too
15:57more modern ones
15:58and you
16:00stop building boats
16:02but
16:03i'm a boat builder
16:04now you're a jail builder
16:05i need one with no leg holes
16:07or head holes
16:08a plain box then
16:11it's what a loser deserves
16:13no one will be calling us that after what ether just did
16:19on second thought
16:22maybe not a plain box after all
16:25loser viper jail
16:26so much for the name not sticking
16:28jessica forced me to make it
16:30and then she arrested me as a traitor
16:32us two
16:33i totally did
16:35because traitors are losers
16:37now where's my minister of smells
16:42i thought you were a horse
16:44i got promoted for a special mission
16:46go put your pocket cheese in the viper's loser cell
16:49pocket cheese
16:51smells worse than collars fee
16:53oi
16:54thanks
16:55oh before i forget
16:58as you were so funny earlier
17:00you can be my new jester too
17:02and i'll do a funny dance
17:05like she's gonna do that
17:07it's going really well mr holt
17:08and it looks like ether's about to perform a new character
17:11listen
17:17jiggity dee
17:18jiggity doo
17:19jiggity da
17:20what's it
17:21do
17:25what
17:26no no i i didn't get it either
17:28but the kids were loving it
17:31ether
17:33i can't wait for tomorrow's executions
17:37there's only meant to be one
17:38four stinky losers
17:40four executions
17:41and did i mention we're going to film them for the school website
17:45she can't do that
17:47can she do that
17:48i totally can
17:49she totally can
17:50i emailed mr holt about it
17:51and he thinks it's such a good idea
17:54so now everyone can watch me winning
17:56and you losing
17:58forever
18:01and i can still smell the pocket cheese
18:07no one could take you two
18:09heathen's getting her eggs chopped off tomorrow
18:11so she is
18:12that'll be fun
18:16we're selling tickets
18:19i can't let her humiliate us like this
18:21we'll be known as losers forever
18:24losers losers losers losers losers
18:26i just want to show the lads that history could be cool
18:29but jessica keeps rewriting it
18:31maybe we could do that too
18:33rewrite history
18:34think about it
18:35think about it
18:35jessica losing the battle
18:36would be a crazy plot twist
18:38everyone would be talking about it
18:47i do like that
18:50but it does go against my principle of
18:52doing anything not historically accurate
18:55did mary queen of scots really wear this ridiculous thing
18:58no wonder nobody voted for her
19:06i'm in
19:07yes
19:08and i've got the perfect plan
19:10first i sneak out of myself
19:13using a devious lie
19:15and while the vipers gain support
19:17to the revolution
19:18mary queen of scots is busy
19:21looking at memes as she often did in 1567
19:24on her wooden phone
19:32don't care if it's not practical
19:34i want a gold boat
19:36gold
19:38and then we plot to overthrow the evil queen
19:53what's that
19:57secret meeting
19:58who put that there
20:05connor
20:15pretty clever if i say so myself
20:17and i do
20:18okay
20:19this is kind of cool
20:21and a plot to overthrow the queen is entirely accurate historically speaking
20:26you're ruining it
20:28clangily speaking
20:29i'll go drum up more support
20:33when jessica tries to execute me and the vipers
20:36i'll give the signal to our supporters
20:37they'll set us free
20:39and everyone will follow us to the battle
20:41where the vipers will show the entire school how to win
20:44with style
20:45why should i go along with this
20:48because i'll make you look good
20:52i don't need help with that
20:54he does
20:56jessica's just trying to beat you quickly so she can do a boring speech
20:59i'll give you a hero's death
21:02pure hollywood
21:04what about me
21:05what do i get
21:08pocket jeez
21:09i'm sure the king is in need for a master of smells
21:14nothing can stop me now
21:18scottish queen appreciates your support
21:24it's all very exciting
21:26oh mr holt wants me to film the event for him
21:28that's good isn't it
21:29if it's not historically accurate
21:31he'll make me do all the rubbish jobs no one else wants
21:33like what
21:35lunchtime detentions
21:36spell checking graffiti
21:38stopping birds doing the toilet on his car
21:41what's that hawkey
21:42you're so hungry
21:43you could eat 50 pigeons
21:47i wouldn't have time to coach bouncy ball
21:49it's going to be great jim
21:51especially with ephra and connor helping out
21:53well mainly connor
22:00isn't that right connor
22:02how do you know i'm here
22:04because i'm your mum
22:05and also you breathe really loudly
22:09there's a lot resting on this for jim
22:11and the vipers
22:12it is gonna go well isn't it
22:16only if i can get to ephra on time
22:24merry queen of scots
22:26aka ephra queen of losers
22:30not for long
22:31i hereby sent you
22:33i reject your sentence
22:35now now is the time to rise up against this evil queen
22:40follow me into the battle
22:42and i will defeat the spanish king
22:44for you
22:46my people
22:47now who's with me
22:52i said
22:54who's with me
22:57seriously who's with me
23:03looks like your little revolution has failed
23:08we can't get the history wrong
23:10connor said we'd lose jim as a coach
23:12we'll have no choice
23:29and this is where we came in
23:30CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP!
23:45CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP!
23:45CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP!
23:46CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CHOP! CH
24:00Does this mean that he was right?
24:03That history and Connor can be cool?
24:07All right, but we can never tell him.
24:09Agreed.
24:22Where's Aoife?
24:25Jessica's won again.
24:27And we've lost.
24:28We're officially the losers.
24:31Forever.
24:33This really is the worst of times.
24:36But the best of times for a round-up.
24:41So it all started when we had to call ourselves the losers
24:44because someone made a bet.
24:46It doesn't matter who.
24:48So then I tried to change the past in more ways than one.
24:51But then I'd realised we'd lose Jim and nobody wanted that.
24:54So now Jessica's going to win again.
24:57And we're going to be stuck with these stupid nicknames forever.
25:01Losers!
25:02Losers!
25:03Losers!
25:05Unless...
25:07Guys, it's not over.
25:09Yes, it is.
25:10The battle's just beginning.
25:12Like, our battle's just beginning.
25:14What are you going on about?
25:15I was wrong.
25:17We can't change what's happened,
25:19but we can change what does happen.
25:23Starting now.
25:24How?
25:25Jessica wins, like, always.
25:29But she doesn't.
25:33Queen Elizabeth does.
25:48Yes!
25:49Come on, smash them!
25:51Oh, no, no, no, no.
25:52What?
25:53Oh!
25:55Oh, here you are, Mr Holt.
25:58Jessica's Queen Elizabeth is just about to defeat Ben's Spanish king.
26:03Oh, no!
26:03Oh, not king.
26:06Duke.
26:06Very well-dressed Duke with the king's hat on.
26:10I thought Aoife would have at least come out to watch.
26:13Well, how?
26:14She's not got her head.
26:15Oh, yeah.
26:16Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
26:27Uh-oh!
26:28Oh!
26:28Just save her queen.
26:31What?
26:32No, this is good.
26:34No matter what, Queen Elizabeth will win.
26:37Oh, oh, oh.
26:38Right, vipers.
26:39Time to show everyone who the real queens of Midvale are.
26:42Charles!
26:45you have to lose to me lie down nah not my style smells master let's go out in
26:52glory
27:27very cool that's how winning's done halty baby viper style
27:35you can cut that last bit out right but it's a live stream did she just call me halty baby
27:43it'll grow on him
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