- 1 day ago
مسلسل After Life مترجم - Episode 2
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00:11I don't want you to grieve forever I mean grieve a bit I want everyone in floods at
00:17the funeral but don't spiral don't obsess keep going get up don't mope about in bed
00:24all day get out open the curtains enjoy the Sun while you can
01:03hungry if you could open a tin I'd be dead now but you can't can you because you're useless
01:14who's useless who's useless you are you are you're useless good girl
01:44you still want me to put it through the door then no you can give it to me just a
01:48postcard from Mike
01:49and Beth whoever they are friends what does it say just says they're in a great time and once had
01:57diarrhea good well let's hope you're still my postman when I'm blind go on
02:14well we went to that nice Greek restaurant that we usually go to you know that one at the top
02:18of
02:18the road well Sheila was in a terrible mood again oh I'm going mad you're only mad if they answer
02:29back
02:30he does answer back what does he say depends what I ask him of course your mum
02:45my wife oh sorry Stan was my husband I'm Anne I'm Tony nice to meet you
03:07he seems nice does he agree of course never disagreed with me once not in 48 years
03:20I didn't get that long
03:45I met a nice lady in the graveyard dad
03:49don't tell Lisa fuck me she's more your age
03:58bit of Viagra Bob's your uncle
04:04is he
04:06always nice to chat
04:08right here we go at last sorry about that oh hi
04:13right cup of tea two sugars right let's get you sorted give you a wee comb
04:21don't look too bad actually do that
04:23it's nice out there today get out in the garden later on eh
04:29I don't know how you do it
04:31what
04:32stay sane
04:34he doesn't know what you're going on about does he
04:36he didn't remember you I bet
04:38he doesn't know he's alive
04:40what is the point what do you mean what is the point they helped us when they
04:44could now they can't he can't even help himself so I do
04:48no I know but is it for the best we don't know what they're feeling do we
04:52they don't know so just in case be nice to them eh
05:02my dad's completely gone now I feel bad that I resent having to visit him every day but I know
05:09I'd feel bad if I didn't visit him every day and then when I do visit him every day I
05:12feel bad when I leave because it was so depressing
05:15I know I know I'm not thinking straight but I don't want to think straight because when I do
05:19I got even more fucking depressed because I just want to sleep you know I haven't
05:26sorry am I boring you
05:28I just got into an argument on twitter with this absolute moron medical student and now he's decided to block
05:33me because he couldn't take it
05:36it's pathetic
05:37it is yeah
05:40love to meet him
05:42yeah
05:43I'll fucking give him a good hiding
05:55I'll have to buy some smack
05:57yep
05:58how much to get for that then
06:00just a
06:01it's like a little bag
06:04I might join you one day
06:07yeah anytime
06:08tonight
06:09er
06:11how do you mean
06:12I want to try heroin tonight
06:15what you really
06:16yeah
06:18why not
06:18fuck it
06:21how much for one try
06:22er
06:24one try one hit
06:25what do you want exactly
06:26not injecting it
06:28I can't stand needles
06:29also AIDS
06:30I don't want to die of that
06:31you only get AIDS if you share needles
06:33anyway these days you don't really die of it so
06:36so
06:37everything moves on doesn't it
06:39even AIDS
06:42yeah it's probably best if you smoke a bit in a joint it's no big deal
06:45chasing the dragon
06:48yeah
06:49yeah
06:50okay
06:50get me er
06:5420 quid's worth
06:56just want a little taster
06:57okay
06:58bring it around at
06:597
07:00yeah
07:01yep
07:02do you know where I live
07:03yeah
07:03and
07:05keep it
07:06alright
07:07okay
07:20you ready jabber
07:21one minute
07:34get a lovely little handful of his neck
07:37like a pug
07:40you alright
07:43how's it going
07:44I'm still alone
07:45angry and pain
07:47I can't wait to end it all
07:48you
07:49I'm fine thanks
07:50well look if you're not killing yourself tonight
07:52are you still okay to look after George
07:53yeah
07:54what time do you say
07:55er
07:56about 5
07:57I've got a thing with Jill
07:58it'll only be a couple of hours
07:59I'll be back by 7
08:007
08:01by 7
08:02I need to
08:03I've got a thing at 7
08:05yeah
08:07okay
08:07and what were you doing with his neck
08:09just showing
08:10Sandy the ropes
08:11the consistency
08:13which is not like neck at all
08:15it's more like breast
08:16or scrotum
08:17well you're not touching them
08:19you alright with that
08:21yeah fine
08:22nodding
08:24you alright with that
08:24yeah
08:25why wouldn't she be alright
08:26with me grabbing his neck
08:28these days
08:28it's a minefield
08:31are you going to do that story
08:32by the way
08:32yeah
08:32we're off to do it now
08:33come on
08:35is that how you carried round
08:36when you were young
08:40see you later
08:40see ya
08:42see ya
08:50wow
09:05lost for words
09:06it's just
09:10how long did it take you to
09:12master the double nostril recorder
09:15a few hours a day for a few weeks
09:16wasn't it
09:17oh yeah
09:18blimey did me head in
09:19all worth it now though
09:23yeah
09:23yeah
09:24cool
09:25I haven't got a job
09:26no
09:27no
09:27because I've got lots of time
09:29you use it wisely
09:31funny because it was only this morning
09:33I was thinking my life
09:34was worthless
09:35and I should definitely kill myself
09:37and then
09:39makes you think doesn't it
09:41yeah
09:45get a picture
09:47recorders in
09:49stick them up there
09:50there you go
09:52fuck me
09:55cheers then
09:56thanks
09:56thank you
10:09that was funny
10:11was it though
10:13a fat kid who still lives at home with his mum
10:15no job
10:16so he shoves recorders up his nose
10:18and he wants the world to know
10:19why would people rather be famous for being shit than not famous at all
10:22when did that start
10:23it's just a bit of a laugh
10:25we do these stories so people read them and go oh that's interesting
10:28like a road accident
10:30when you slow down on the motorway you go oh that's interesting oh I wish I hadn't looked
10:35good how you play two at the same time
10:41what were you talking to the mother about
10:42asking if I could call her
10:44why
10:44what do you mean why
10:46why would you need to call her
10:47for a date
10:49you ask the fat kid's mum at on a date
10:51yeah
10:52unbelievable
10:52why
10:54unprofessional embarrassing
10:55for who
10:56for me
10:57for her probably
10:58oh she said yes
11:00seems odd
11:01you meet a woman who wants to get her fat kid in the paper
11:03and you hit on her immediately
11:04I've got a very high sex drive
11:06okay we'll never say those words again
11:15oh
11:16it's coming this way
11:18be very still
11:20and it might not see us
11:24no we're done for
11:26it's stopping
11:30all right
11:31hey
11:37do you have weird dreams
11:41um
11:43sometimes
11:43sometimes
11:44yeah
11:46what about you
11:47not at the moment
11:48I don't have any dreams at the moment
11:49because I'm not sleeping
11:50but even if I did
11:51I wouldn't tell them to anyone
11:53because there is nothing more boring
11:55than someone telling you a dream they had
11:57see what you think of this then
11:59she's going to tell us anyway
12:00I was looking in the mirror
12:02and I look really weird
12:03and I could pull my hair out
12:05I know how you feel
12:06and so I tried my teeth and my teeth were loose
12:10but then it wasn't me
12:12it was a baby
12:13what the hell does that mean
12:14wow
12:15you had that dream with the baby and the teeth and the hair
12:17wow
12:18I don't know if it was Freud or Jung
12:20that said if you have that dream
12:21and then tell other people about it
12:23you're really fucking boring
12:24rude
12:27make a good column though
12:28wouldn't it dreams
12:28no
12:29I tell you what would be good though
12:30as I say I haven't been sleeping
12:31so if you could come round every night
12:33and talk to me for five minutes
12:34and then sneak out as I slip into a coma
12:37that would be really good
12:40thought of another good feature for the paper actually
12:42fantasy dinner party guests
12:44brilliant eh
12:45pick your top five favourite people and why
12:47why indeed
12:48who would yours be
12:49five people dead or alive
12:51dead
12:52who though
12:53doesn't matter as long as they're all dead
12:54oh
12:55I know mine
12:56of course you do
12:56number one James Corden
12:58fuck me
12:59we could do that carpool karaoke
13:00could you do carpool kamikaze
13:02that man can do anything
13:03and does
13:04I know the cool kids don't like him
13:06but he never stops working
13:07as a chauffeur mainly
13:08he's a grafter like me
13:10princess Diana
13:12she'd know how she died
13:13you know what happened
13:14so we'll be able to sort that out once and for all
13:17so you've brought this poor woman back to life
13:19so you can quiz her about how she died
13:21the dead always want to tell their story so they can be at peace
13:25she's not at peace
13:25she's in a room with you and James fucking Corden
13:27Mr. Bean
13:28fictional
13:29hilarious more like
13:30you've invited multi-millionaire Rowan Atkinson
13:33right
13:34along to a dinner party with you
13:35a dead woman
13:36and James Corden
13:38and you expect him to stay in character for three hours as Mr. fucking Bean
13:42it's up to me who I invite
13:46Kevin Hart
13:47funniest man in the world
13:48that's four innit
13:50yeah
13:51Michael Jackson
13:53James Corden would come
13:55if Jacko walked in
13:56just fucking drench everyone
13:58you need to grow up
14:02worst
14:03dinner party ever
14:07oh
14:08good
14:09busy?
14:11trying to be
14:12just watching from office doesn't look like you are
14:13you mean we're watching there bothering us
14:15while we're trying to work
14:16can you do what I asked you to do please
14:17you're meant to be teaching Sandy
14:19she's learning a lot
14:22please
14:30right
14:31it's going
14:32no come on
14:33yeah
14:33this is stupid
14:35you're gonna get hurt
14:36why?
14:37because you're old
14:37I'm not old
14:38no do it
14:39I'm old
14:39come on
14:40look I'm drunk
14:41I know but that's good if you're drunk
14:42no it's stupid
14:43no drunk people don't get hurt
14:44they sort of bounce
14:44right come on
14:45if I fall on you
14:46I'm not taking you to A&E
14:48no
14:48right go
14:49go
14:51oh
14:52oh
14:52oh
14:52oh
14:55yes
14:55yes
14:56yes
14:56let go
14:57let go
14:57let go
15:08so what sort of journalism are you interested in
15:12you don't have to babysit me
15:15I'm happy to just sit here
15:17I like peace and quiet
15:19I live at home with my mum, dad, brother and sister
15:21so the house can be quite full of life
15:25oh
15:26what
15:27sorry
15:28what
15:29what's the matter
15:31you're sad
15:32it's fine
15:34seriously
15:35I was married for 25 years
15:37it was brilliant
15:38now it's over
15:40it's not your problem
15:42did you not want any kids
15:43no
15:44annoying little fuckers
15:50you can still be happy
15:51I'll try but stop crying
15:53because people think I've said something awful
15:55you can't be
15:56okay
15:57okay
15:57see this is why I don't want kids
15:59they're too snotty and pathetic
16:03oh
16:04he's going to eat
16:05watch this
16:27he told you to watch me eating any
16:28yeah
16:30thought
16:30it's fine
16:33no exactly
16:33I put the food in my gob
16:35I chew it
16:36I swallow it
16:36just like everyone else
16:37but from here
16:38it looks like that super photography
16:40when they sort of magnify
16:42a snail
16:43like 1,000 times
16:44eating a cabbage
16:46nothing like that
16:47you'd never catch me eating cabbages
16:48my granddad never used to eat cabbages
16:50did he die of diabetes
16:52like he's going to
16:53no bowel cancer
16:57do you get any fibre in your diet
16:58yeah loads
16:59what fruit and veg
17:00I don't have five a day
17:02how many portions of fruit and veg do you have a day
17:03ten
17:04potatoes don't count
17:05none then
17:24oh my god Tony
17:28you're such a dick
17:32that's really good
17:33thanks
17:34I like to think that I helped
17:35yeah
17:36yeah that bit
17:37you can sign that bit
17:39yeah
17:40where I jumped
17:47hey alright
17:48good
17:48alright George
17:49so I'll be back about 7
17:51make sure it's 7
17:51I've got that
17:52thing
17:53ok no worries
17:54see you then
17:54yep
17:55be a good boy for Uncle Tony George
17:59maybe don't bring up the wanting to kill yourself thing
18:03as if I would
18:04sorry yeah I know I know
18:06ok
18:07what if he brings it up
18:10why would he bring it up
18:12he wouldn't
18:13it was a joke
18:15oh
18:17alright see you later
18:18tell her
18:23do you want a drink
18:25yes please
18:31whiskey
18:32hmm
18:34what have you got
18:35oh
18:37coke
18:45daddy says you're sad
18:46since Aunt Lisa died
18:48yep
18:49I'm sad too
18:51I dream about her sometimes
18:54me too
18:55why didn't the doctors make her better
18:59they tried
19:01why didn't Jesus save her
19:03because he's an arsehole
19:05don't tell your mum and dad I said that
19:07I won't
19:09you had your tea
19:10no
19:11hungry
19:12yeah
19:14should you go to the cafe
19:16yeah
19:16yeah
19:17come on then
19:20you got any money
19:21no
19:22loser
19:27what do you fancy
19:29fish fingers and beans
19:31good choice
19:32I think I'll have that
19:35what can I get for you
19:36we're both having the fish fingers and beans please
19:38that's only on the children's menu
19:40I'm afraid
19:40yeah I'm not very angry
19:42I can't let you order that
19:44what do you mean
19:46it's for children
19:47I can eat what children eat can't I
19:49yeah but it's only £4.99
19:51yeah I know
19:52because it's a smaller portion
19:54I'm paying child's prices
19:56but I'm getting a children's portion
19:58yeah but we made it cheaper
20:00because it's for kids
20:01I know
20:02because they're smaller
20:03and it's smaller because they're small
20:05it's not a concession
20:05it's not because they're unemployed
20:07is it
20:07and also
20:08an adult's paying
20:09so
20:09it's the rules
20:12is it
20:13hmm
20:14right
20:15well
20:16he'll have fish fingers and beans
20:18twice
20:20no but you're just going to eat one of them aren't you
20:22no
20:23so what are you ordering then
20:24as I said I'm not very hungry
20:25so I'll just get a coffee
20:32right for those for here Marley
20:41not good
20:42hmm
20:47hmm
21:05where's your fucking dad
21:09oh
21:10please don't be Julian
21:12please don't be Julian
21:14yes
21:17George
21:18I'm sorry
21:19that's alright
21:20see you there
21:20cheers
21:21there he is
21:22all alright
21:22see you tomorrow
21:23all alright
21:24yeah good
21:24yeah
21:24have a good time
21:27hey what are you doing here
21:29because
21:30it's come around to
21:31talk about getting started on the paper
21:34not this
21:35oh right
21:35yeah
21:36great
21:36exactly
21:37right
21:38got a takeaway
21:39it's drugs
21:40you don't need to answer
21:41what is
21:41and it's seven
21:42so go
21:43okay
21:44come in
21:45is that alright
21:46did you have fun
21:47why would you say drugs
22:16why would you say drugs
22:24I miss the earth so much, I miss my wife, it's lonely out in space, on such a timeless
22:52And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, no touchdown brings me round to get to find, I'm
23:00not the man that think I am at home, oh no, no, no, I'm a rocket man
23:09Rocket man, burning out his fuse out here alone
23:20And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, no touchdown brings me round to get to find, I'm
23:28not the man that think I am at home, oh no, no, no, I'm a rocket man
23:37Rocket man, burning out his fuse out here alone
23:48And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, no touchdown brings me round to get to find, I'm
23:56not the man that think I am at home, oh no, no, no, I'm a rocket man
24:05Rocket man, burning out his fuse out here alone
24:10And I think it's gonna be a long, long time
24:23And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
24:23no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
24:23no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
24:23no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
24:23no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
24:23no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
24:56You
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