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The Claudia Winkleman Show - Season 1 Episode 7
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FunTranscript
00:00Hello, how are you? Thank you. Good
00:04Quite giggly
00:06This is when we put the best bits of the show together. Have you watched any of it? I watched
00:12one, okay
00:17Only because I go to bed early. No, so do I
00:31I
00:54Always happen just screaming every single day of my life
01:00Just
01:02I'm not gonna lie. I'm shit myself, Claudia. No
01:07Rachel your best friend is
01:10Your biggest fan, which I'm sure you get this a lot when I was growing up and One Direction was
01:15getting very popular
01:16I was getting into Les Miserables, so I wasn't really me, too
01:23And my best friend when I was a kid I've known her since I was one
01:26Oh, her name is Carly, and she had a cardboard cut out of you in her bedroom
01:32So when we had sleepovers, do you know who watched me sleep?
01:35Oh
01:37It's all coming back
01:40It's all coming back to me now
01:42It really is
01:44Quite intense to see you in the flesh
01:47Thank you all so much for coming because Jimmy you got in from Australia literally this morning
01:53Well, I flew from Australia but via los angeles. Oh
01:57So it was I went I'm basically trying to prove flat earthers wrong
02:03How do you deal with it? What's the answer Lisa? What's your do you have an answer you get on
02:08the plane drugs?
02:12But what he's supposed to eat I can't travel anywhere I can't go to Manchester I get jet lag I've
02:17never yeah, it's true
02:18I've never moved I don't think you're supposed to eat I think you're not supposed to eat you know when
02:23to eat on the plane
02:24Right, I don't eat plain food
02:25You don't I do if I'm hungry
02:31That's how food works I
02:35I
02:35Read once that you love meat. I always know I always travel with like biltong. It's like cured sort of
02:44And when you say like do you take a sliver or are you taking a bag? I take like a
02:48big big bag
02:50Just to get me free. Yeah, I think sort of fatty bag of sort of old meat
02:58What's happening
02:59I think you can get like prepackaged stuff in supermarkets. It's terrible
03:03I feel like I need a visual of it. I don't know what it looks like
03:05I go to like a South Africa like a South Africa
03:06It's the store like it's still Africa themed store, but does the meat is it odiferous like does it smell
03:14really bad?
03:15I don't think it smells bad, but I think other people might think it smells bad. I don't know. Just
03:20curious
03:20You know, yeah, it smells good. You do your meat eater. I love meat. Yeah, listen
03:26I'll bring you to this of Africa themed shop
03:30This is the worst episode of first
03:35Chase infinity the best name on the sofa the best name I think I've ever heard
03:41Your parents very clever. How did they put it together?
03:44they they had watched Batman forever and Nicole Kidman played a character named Chase Meridian and they were like regardless
03:50of anything
03:51Her name is gonna be chased because they were obsessed with Nicole Kidman in in that movie
03:55And then infinity comes from a toy story to infinity and beyond and I've just gone by chase infinity since
04:00I was ten
04:01So that's that's how they sort of decided what you were gonna do
04:05Before they even met kind of crazy literally crazy how that happened
04:09But yeah, and what's your sister called her name is Dolce and she's into fashion. She went to school for
04:15Is that all you have to do
04:20Would have given my kids different names
04:25Rita thank you for coming because you've come from very far, but you love London used to live here. I
04:30do love London
04:31Yes
04:31I went to drama school here at lambda very long time ago, but it was super fun
04:36And it was it was you know, like you're living in England you're in London. I saw so much theater
04:42It was absolutely fantastic
04:44Yeah, so when you come back and you like I remember this little shop or I want to have this
04:49soup from here
04:50Oh, no, no, you have to understand like I was on a student's budget and so in in America
04:55We have this thing called the freshman 10 which is when you go off to college you immediately gain 10
05:00pounds
05:01And I definitely had that because my diet was like mcdiddies mcvitties
05:05Did I say mcdiddies?
05:06I like mcdiddies
05:07Guys, we're going to mcdiddies
05:09Mcdiddies?
05:10But that was mcdiddies
05:11We all did that in freshman year
05:14McDonald's
05:17I'll have the double ditty
05:19I'll have the double ditty and an STD test
05:22But mcdiddies was also mcdonald's because it was like french fries or mcdiddies
05:26That was my diet and my buddy loved it. Yeah, you were like, thank you. I will yes exactly give
05:32me more please
05:33Russell
05:34For you Bristol or London?
05:37Well, I'm from Bristol. So I you know, I prefer Bristol, but it's no I like I like London
05:42I'm a fan. I I got I got mugged here once it was the most but it was the most
05:47middle-class mugging
05:49So a friend of mine had she'd just given birth
05:51So I've got some cupcakes so I'm carrying these cupcakes up this hill and this kid's probably about 15
05:56Really pasty looking kid just stands in front of me goes, oi
06:02You better give me one of them cupcakes
06:06Suddenly kind of went you can't have them that's my friend. She's just given birth this kid suddenly went. I'm
06:12sorry tell a congratulation
06:14You said this is such a beautiful moment of like
06:19You kind of go from fear to like, yeah
06:22And I like it
06:24We have unbelievable news because Dan you are moving to London. Yeah
06:34Yes, I have a place here that is I will be here as much as I possibly can with within
06:41legal bounds
06:43You lived here before I did I lived here in my early had a very bad relationship
06:48I'm sorry needed to come here because that's where notting hill was the movie
06:56And I was like, I don't know I'm 21 years old anything's possible. I'm gonna move to London and find
07:02myself
07:02So I found a little apartment. Yeah, and it was great. And it was I moved in and I'm a
07:08I'd like to be clean
07:10I'm spraying everywhere. I don't know who was in here before it was kind of dirty
07:15I'm hearing rumors from the people downstairs that it might have been a a mother-daughter
07:22Sex duo got it
07:25Sexy probably had way more sex in there than I did anyway
07:29I'm cleaning
07:30I pull the bed from the wall at this point. I had taken my gloves off
07:36And I'm now you know when you're in cleaning mode. It doesn't you're not really fishing. So I'm reaching down
07:41the side of the bed
07:44I'm gonna tell you what I found and then you tell me what you think it is. Okay. Okay, so
07:49I grabbed it
07:50I just say the weirdest game show I've ever been on
07:53I'm into it slips out of my hands. Oh, what do you mean? Oh hell it was a
08:00Yeah, phallic shaped perfume bottle
08:04Wrapped in a condom. Oh and tied at the end. Oh
08:09And slippery
08:15I love giant was it your flat
08:19Finally someone found it
08:24What do you think it was? What perfume?
08:26It's a sex toy, isn't it? No, not perfume
08:29It was perfume until someone turned it into something else. Why else would it be mean have a condom? Well,
08:34maybe because it was cold
08:38I don't you ask
08:43Anna, uh you wrote a brilliant book. Oh, I better get it some water. Yes
08:47Called unqualified where you talk about the professions that one should avoid
08:52Yes in in dating list some of the things we should not go near number one
08:57Magician, correct
09:00Somebody who was tricking you. I don't know they won't let you in on their secrets
09:05I had a boy that they're gonna bore you rigid with a pack of cards
09:10Take my bra off. I don't give a shit
09:12Yeah, number two athlete professional athlete
09:17For the normal reasons cheating and whatnot, but also because
09:22I think you're gonna have to do some ego lifting
09:25Yeah, you know, oh the rookie isn't that good or and they're gonna want a smoothie as soon as your
09:31knee gets better
09:32Yeah, number three chef
09:35Um, I do think it's an environment when I was waiting tables where uh, it felt like anger
09:44Wasn't managed was celebrated. I don't think you can leave that mentality at work. Yeah
09:49Um, I think there's only one in the list of
09:53Professions you should date. Yep. And what is that please? That is a woodworker a canoe
09:59Somebody who makes canoes by the coast cop and solitary he's sad
10:07He's sad he's been lonely and he's but he's carving that canoe and sanding it
10:13I imagine he's quite thorough. Oh, yeah. Yes
10:26Sorry, um, you know what we've got an army of in the audience
10:30Woodworkers they're right there. No
10:43Quiet heroes. Yes
10:46Liam, I think you are the speaker of the woodworkers. Is that right? I think so. Yeah, okay. Um, have
10:52you ever made a canoe?
10:54Yeah, uh, and I'm very thorough
11:00Standing and standing
11:03What do you think about as you're standing? Yeah, do you think about love all the time?
11:10For the rest of you any professions you'd steer clear of actors
11:16Olivia, I think if you own or created an app
11:20I think it's
11:21What about the man who created wordle for his girlfriend? It's so wrong. Oh, I didn't know that story
11:26Okay, he not him but other but all the other ones you don't want an app created ones all the
11:30ones that are coming to mind
11:34Do you know I keep on thinking where you're like a woodworker, but it's got like a story
11:37I'm like you need to read the bible
11:46Yeah, yeah the album is called the sound of a woman right the sound of a woman I think is
11:53just
11:53Shhh
11:54Exactly
11:55I say that quite a lot
11:56My husband has an idea
12:10We've even heard that a lot
12:23Years ago in the noise i'll never do it justice, but she saw it with
12:26It was so just and you can sort of see it happening as he's walking down various women
12:34He's just sort of gliding down the street causing various noises
12:38Um, I could do something, but it's filthy do it. Just do it right now before
12:43No, no, no
12:45I was just making conversation
13:02I can't
13:03I'll tell you what I can do I can do an extraordinary but it's audio only
13:09horse impression
13:11Do you want to go around the back so that we can only hear you?
13:15And I have used it in foreplay
13:21Are you ready?
13:24It's audio just imagine wedding night 28 years guys
13:29Ready are you coming to bed?
13:32Yes, I get pretend hooves on I don't
13:35Are you ready?
13:46We all would
13:50That is the sound of a woman
13:55Just to be clear
13:58What a man
14:01Go am you're doing all of these shows and you also would like to adopt a dog
14:06I bought a house finally on the ladder. I have a garden lovely
14:09I was like I'll obviously I'll rescue a dog because that's what you do. Are you adopt?
14:13Also, I'm adopted myself, so I feel it's only fair to pay it forward
14:15Yeah, I know
14:23I'm a rescue I'm a rescue dog
14:27So I would always rescue I would never buy new
14:31I'm
14:32Shame on you for having your own children claudia
14:34You should have done
14:37How dare you
14:38So anyway, I went I rang up and it is so hard
14:42And now I'll probably get rinsed for saying this
14:45But like I was like a blah blah blah I want to adopt a little
14:47And they were like yeah, do you have a car?
14:49And I was like no I said I have access to an e-scooter
14:54And they were like oh do you don't have a car?
14:55And I was like they're like you can't adopt a dog
14:58And I was like what am I driving it to?
14:59It's piano lessons
15:02I like the fact that I'm just like us we're having a chat and Rafe looks like help me
15:08I want to talk about my play
15:11Wait, I'm going to talk to you about your play. I don't want you to panic and run away screaming.
15:16I'm staying here. Yeah, good boy. Thank you
15:19The good boy was too much
15:23As I said I was like I'm uncomfortable
15:27There'll be an opening night there will be a red carpet
15:31Do you guys like a red carpet look at olivia's face straight away? It's it's disgusting, isn't it?
15:37Well, when you've got all those people
15:39Screaming at you
15:41My reaction is to want to cry or run away
15:44And so like I can't I can't sort like it sort of all that energy gets put down and under
15:49my dress my like right knee is quivering like that
15:51Yeah, it's
15:53But it's like it's no, but it can be scary
15:55Oh 100% and I don't know there isn't at least
16:00When I my first red carpet was in the year 2004 scary movie and it felt confusing
16:06I'm sure some of those photos. I am really like, you know caught
16:12Caught like I know I don't belong
16:16Uh here on this red carpet and I think you guys know that too
16:20That's always the feeling of like
16:23Imposter syndrome. Yes, I feel like it's just a necessary evil, you know
16:28I mean like you've got to do the red carpet to get into the venue to quaff the free champagne
16:32Yeah, it's the tax
16:37Yeah
16:39So true
16:40In my life and i'm 54 i've never met anybody who likes a red carpet and then
16:47Rafe
16:48In my life i meet you yeah, i've got evidence let's have a look exhibit one please
16:57He has a lot i know what you're thinking you guys it's a one-off
17:03Buckle up his is number two
17:08He's enjoying himself that's nothing
17:12Let's have number three
17:20And finally as we're all going oh and it's uncomfortable and they're saying my name
17:26Rafe finds ladies and gentlemen
17:36So why why do you love it you come out of the car you're wearing a suit you've got something
17:41I don't know you're just ready and they're shouting rape rape and you're like i've come along
17:44You know what happens you can make that rape rape or what i met the name and you
17:51Suddenly a boredom factor kicks in
17:57And you entertain yourself to get through the fucking thing
18:03That's a great strategy
18:09Dawn and i my friend dawn french and i once thought we'd be really daring and we got
18:14An ecstasy tablet oh
18:16And we thought we could take well i think it was something with a rabbit on it it was about
18:20that big
18:22And we thought one day i said well be alone it became such a matter of planning as to when
18:29we could take half
18:32An ecstasy tablet and so we kept it and kept it on dawn's mantelpiece like that and then one day
18:38just about six months later
18:40When we've gone okay right we're ready we had water we had we didn't know what to expect
18:46The pill had gone no
18:50Your dog was looking lively that day
18:54And it was quite a relief yeah thank god we don't do that anymore
18:58Yeah no drugs for us the dog was out in the garden jumping up and down
19:03Having sex with the trap
19:07Where did you first meet him where did i first meet riz Ahmed
19:11For legal purposes i've been asked to frame this story
19:16To go back like 20 years could be a little bit more
19:19Um and i'm from coventry i still live there and i before i did this had different vocations
19:26Mm-hmm um one of my vocations was
19:32Selling tulips let's go with that
19:35Let's go with that
19:36What beautiful tulips they were right yeah i was a florist people really like the flowers every time they
19:41There's their brother this flower is the best flower i ever smell in my whole life okay
19:47I was in an alleyway with my still best friend till this day and a gentleman comes running into the
19:52alleyway
19:53And when you're selling tulips late at night you know everyone's on edge
19:55Go with it guys
19:59I looked down the alleyway and there's riz Ahmed
20:03But i didn't know it was riz Ahmed and riz Ahmed was a little bit nervous about the the activity
20:07of floristry in this particular alleyway
20:10But to his credit riz decided to venture down there to me and my friend and said my brothers
20:15Um i'm about to spit some bars in the students union would you like to join me and i looked
20:21at my friend and said probably not man these tulips ain't gonna sell themselves
20:24My friend who's a good person he's a good geezer he said no we should support this guy he looks
20:31kind of stressed
20:32So we accompanied him to the students union this is oscar-winning riz Ahmed 20 years ago and he performed
20:39Quite okayish rap music
20:42To a group of six people in coventry students union
20:47And 10 years later when i started doing like comedy and silly stuff like that he messaged me and he
20:52goes
20:52But can i ask you a question
20:55I said yeah he said did you used to sell tulips
21:01In an alleyway in coventry and i said who are you the police go away
21:07And that's the story of how me and riz Ahmed
21:09I mean
21:14Josh could you try and explain to dan who who who mr blobby is okay it's quite so there's
21:24Bear in mind this took four hours in the podcast right i need it in 15 to 30 seconds
21:29There's a man called noel edmonds he had a saturday night tv show and he used to prank people it
21:35was huge it was the biggest show
21:36On british tv massive and he thought a good way of doing that would be to dress as a fake
21:40character
21:40So they made mr blobby
21:42Which was a seven foot rubber and pink thing that went blobby blobby blobby
21:47And then you know
21:49Yeah go on yeah yeah
21:52So that's just to be clear noel is on the left
21:55Very good
21:55And um
21:59And then the problem was that mr blobby became so popular
22:05Popular yeah yeah with the with the british public that he uh became absolutely bone chilling
22:13If this creature showed up at my house i would call the police
22:17So that mr blobby he became so popular he got a number one single yeah right christmas
22:23What do you mean he went to things to mr blobby exactly yeah
22:27And then he became so popular they opened a string of mr blobby theme
22:31Yeah that's our mickey mouse yeah
22:44Rita yes a slight bone to pick with you all right you enjoy camping yeah
22:49I love camping so do you mean camping as in we're coming pitch up the tent and bring me a
22:55pet giraffe or are you
22:59Or you're like driving and you're making a stove yes we have one of those vans that is
23:06You know kitted out with a bed and a kitchen and everything and there's nothing better than cooking in the
23:11outdoors
23:12It is so fantastic like i don't know there's something about being under the stars and there's a lovely little
23:20Lovely toilet in there so it's very civilized it's very civilized is it one of those where you have that
23:25blue liquid you have
23:27No they're very high tech now oh are they very very high tech so you know what i mean is
23:32that weird
23:33Exactly he's great and then you're terrible
23:38Working away your shame no it's beautiful and it's really really great
23:44Yeah but it is that sometimes you're like
23:47Is there a friend coming in in a minute she's making the horse noises
23:52I can't kill the move
23:55Lisa your character valerie uh takes part in traitors uh-huh and
24:00I know and
24:03And valerie's uh stint on traitors was inspired a little bit by somebody on the uk traders yes it was
24:12On linda linda
24:19Because for those who haven't um seen and they i'll just explain linda was the person who and i said
24:27traitors
24:27You'll meet each other later and looked at me and nodded
24:32And there was a bit of linda in it wasn't there a bit yeah oh my god
24:36Yeah we had valerie someone saying like well i think he's a traitor and says oh no i can tell
24:42you a hundred percent he's a faithful
24:45How do you know just i have a i have a feeling i mean you know don't you wish we
24:50knew who the traitor was
24:52I don't think so stressful yeah i love the fact that it was based on linda and i think it's
24:57only right that you meet her
24:58But oh yes linda
25:00Hello
25:02Bye
25:19I love seeing you i just somehow wanted linda and lisa together even just for a minute but
25:29Linda in your wildest dreams when that happened and you looked at me and went got it
25:36Did you ever think that then the mighty lisa kudrow would use you as inspiration in her amazing show
25:48Crazy on our show she was voted out like that night
25:59Long time they took a very long time because you're very charming ladies and gentlemen linda
26:19We're all still alive
26:20Yes, we are i just i just i couldn't help it when i watched i was like oh hold on
26:28a minute
26:28Yeah i know but they didn't vote her out sorry none of them are here so i can say not
26:34bright
26:39Um niall i found out some other information about you which i'm obsessed more information about me
26:44For vogue you went through your beauty routine oh jeez
26:51Look at that all right and by the way it would not fit on these cards not even
26:57It's a small font
26:59Hi
27:02There are 22 steps wait one you light a candle to set the tone
27:10Give me a minute go on i'll give her a half an hour
27:14There's a cold water splash pardon number nine is you play with big silver balls
27:23There are so many tell me what you actually do i do quite a few of them to be fair
27:28i'm quite i'm quite
27:29A big into the skin care do the ice water in the morning three or four dunks
27:35Actually i'm gonna action all the time
27:38We've got it a couple of moisturizers and like a serum a moisturizer as to have a spray
27:45Well it's like a cold plunge for your face yeah it's fucking he's actually 72 years old yeah
27:54I'm so impressed i'm used to dealing with lads who cleaned their face with a scrub daddy
27:58I've never
28:07Guys what are you doing in the morning
28:09Look by the way look how immaculate that skin is
28:12Like i wash my face
28:16Sometimes you know sometimes some mornings is hard
28:19My wife puts that um is it like a blackhead strip what is that blackheads i don't know what it
28:25is but
28:25Every time is every time she puts it on she insists that she's the one to take it off
28:31And when she peels it she does the same thing every time she peels it looks at it and says
28:35disgusting
28:38So satisfying just so you know yeah very satisfying though
28:41Does she rip it off like quick or slow it depends on the mood
28:45Got it got it i think what i'm my plan is to um
28:50Two-step skin care and then just eventually got a gorgeous korean facelift yeah
28:55Wow how how we can all be doing it
28:58I want it they just yank you up yeah they yank you up yeah yeah yank you right all right
29:03The problem is where did the folds go who cares where the folds okay goes into the back of your
29:07ears right
29:08I love my eyes on my head i want to so much plastic surgery when they cremate me i won't
29:11burn i'll just
29:22I just shrink amazing remember those crisp packets in the 90s you used to put in the oven they'd just
29:26shrink
29:27That would be me fingers crossed that's my goal yeah it's a good goal i like it
29:33I want my eyes on the top of my head
29:35I want my ass on my back that's what i want
29:40um jeff you've starred obviously in oscar-nominated wicked the biggest musical film in recent memory
29:50and i don't know whether this is true but please say it is that occasionally you would look down the
29:56lens and speak directly to the editor and say i like that take or is that true yes i would
30:02do takes
30:02i was trying to do a good job and sometimes as was my want to do i think is the
30:07phrase i would after a take
30:09i would go uh and he would go and cut okay
30:14jeff says uh myron karstein that's uh that's i say that's that's a good one just so you know our
30:19editor's called steve he's happy with any notes you have
30:23yeah that's your camera over there if you said something that you're particularly proud of you
30:28just say steve add yes i think i've been lively tonight steve and i say any any genuine moment
30:35that especially i like the spontaneous ones yes where there's a real connection which i've felt
30:41strongly with us so i say so far anything is uh good for the show fine thank you steve will
30:48take that
30:50i trust you completely steve james i love the fact we were chatting earlier and you said
30:56your favorite thing is when you're acting is watching the person who is acting right in front
30:59of like sometimes you're and i love when actually when you're so in awe yeah oh man sometimes like
31:05sometimes really good acting just makes it all seem seamless and all that kind of stuff sometimes
31:09you're working with somebody who's just does something so good you're like yeah oh my god
31:14and i was like that with your husband oh really not that we acted together but like i i would
31:19go in
31:20he's yeah no he wouldn't let me um we should say who your husband is just tell the group
31:27you're married too just so you know yes i'm sorry to have to tell you this but um you have
31:35all this
31:36and been married to tom hanks yes and and i yep he does deserve that
31:42i don't know why i do this thing sometimes when i get around famous people when they kind of go
31:47like hey what's up what are you going to get for lunch and they've just been totally normal and i'm
31:50like i feel so uncomfortable and i go into this weird sort of over like almost put on working class
31:58all right man i know i'm gonna get some chips or something i'm gonna get like i drive a punto
32:06how would you drive a ferrari you know brilliant i'm gonna get some bread with butter
32:12i'm gonna get some caviar and i don't know why that happens yeah of course i don't like it it's
32:17a bit like we know when you really fancy somebody yeah but early on you know with the first person
32:22i
32:23somebody so badly when i was 17 he was speak to me and i would just be sick
32:26i had that character in south park he was like everything right
32:33guzz before you got into comedy and before uh all of this you were a teacher
32:39i was a teacher what kind of a teacher were you a shit one
32:47i don't believe that i just don't believe that what do you believe i believe that
32:53you can see it that tracks yeah sure uh what did you teach well here's the thing
33:00so when you do your pgce yeah uh specializing teaching you you you do that in a specific
33:06subject or set of subjects i never got around to teaching those specific sets of subjects right
33:13so like i i was basically like a really good big brother forward slash that fun uncle around
33:19school and i would like to hope to think maybe that i had contributed in a positive way to the
33:24children of grace academy in coventry if i didn't and your favorite gcse's i apologize
33:29that is the plot to school of rock without the music yeah can i tell you something yeah your
33:35students loved you did they love me they loved you would you like to say hello to one no stop
33:39it
33:40i'm going to cry shut the front door i'm going to cry
33:42finran
33:44what
33:46hey with the car
33:50get another one
33:51get another one
33:52come in you y'all
33:58come in
33:59i know you bought all the brown ones
34:20left on the poor white kids at home in coventry have a seat on the sofa
34:32i've loved having a laugh with you but to hear their stories about how brilliant you were i don't
34:38want to embarrass you we've gone a bit um weird but but you were much better than you're saying
34:48because simran what did he do for you you know what as you see mr khan yeah in tv was
34:54just like
34:54how he was in in school yeah i remember the first time i had him in a class yeah he
35:00goes
35:00oi simran call me out and i was like i thought i was in trouble right and he was like
35:06i can't be
35:07asked to do the presentation slide next button you sit there and you do it for me
35:11yes i was like safe right but then the thing is i was quite shy up until i had mr
35:19khan as my teacher
35:20and again he was that fun uncle vibes right where he made me feel comfortable and i started to gain
35:26a bit of confidence from that but even after he left knowing what he pursued was enough to inspire
35:33myself to pursue something different you know when you come from coventry and you come from a
35:39south asian background you're not always pushed to do something creative so now you know i went to
35:43uni i passed yeah you contributed more than you think oh come on
36:04i was a fan you were okay please tell us about mr khan why are you sweating so much
36:10i don't know what i'm allowed to say i'm not allowed to say in it
36:16brother got tulips in his inside pocket
36:20now you know what it is this guy he made us all feel like you can go out and do
36:24anything that you want
36:27coventry's coventry's going for tulips oh yeah like someone's going to come out of there so to
36:42see somebody go out and do it like i'll be the first one to say it and everyone in coventry
36:46has
36:46because it's back in like we're super proud of what you've done now we are nearly at the end of
36:59the
36:59show i cannot express this enough that we are deeply unqualified to answer questions but lovely
37:06people in the audience have questions and so anybody who has a question please um yes sir right yeah so
37:15hello my name is balder i've got a dating question i've just recently started dating no i'm married
37:27sorry sorry no i just recently started dating this girl and i think it's going really well you know
37:34but i'm afraid that maybe she's into like star signs no get out well
37:40oh is that a red flag when was when was she born i don't know but you know the irony
37:49is that we met
37:50filming a music video and she was literally in a star-shaped costume oh so i don't know like oh
37:57that
37:57feels like a classic sagittarius first of all we said we wouldn't bring this here
38:13said you were just coming to support me tonight
38:19why would that be why would that be a bad thing
38:23i i think somebody being into star signs is a big red flag for me this is going to go
38:30down badly
38:30if you'd made me guess i'd have guessed you're into star signs claudia is that true i could burst into
38:37two
38:38that's almost the most offensive thing that anybody has ever said to me
38:43let's go deep on this where is the trauma why do we not like star signs this was my last
38:50show i've talked about your podcast
38:59i've done everything i had to do i can i say this yeah but we won't put it out i
39:06think people who
39:07believe in star signs are thick
39:23yes here we go go on done my question is
39:27i want to tell people when they're being annoying to help them be less annoying um but then i look
39:34like a
39:35a bitch so what's the best way to handle this when you say people how many people are we talking
39:44about i mean i mean it happens every day like there's a lot of there's a lot of people i
39:47would like
39:48to tell that to well the adage would be if you meet three arseholes before noon you're the arsehole
40:06it's tough love
40:08i didn't know it was going to go this way would you like a gentler piece of advice no it's
40:17all right
40:19i think you've learned something yeah me too and that's what life's about
40:27i mainly do dick jokes okay no i like this jimmy as well wow what do you do i feel
40:35like i should
40:35and what do you do my best
40:49i'm training to be a therapist
40:54i mean i mean i'm not sure if it's the job for you
41:06everybody else um my question is what do you think is the the meaning of life
41:20i like it i i i i'm surprised by it and let's run with it rafe
41:30um
41:48good friendships enjoyment of food um acceptance of death
41:57be cool about death be cool about death yeah that's it wow
42:05that's really good thank you so much okay we've got one one final question
42:19oh
42:20Oh, my God!
42:23Oh, my God!
42:26Oh, my God!
42:30Oh, my God!
42:34Oh, my God!
42:36No!
42:37You people are fucking crazy.
42:42Yes, you in the pink, so...
42:43Oh, my God!
42:46Whoa!
42:46Oh, my God!
42:48Oh, my God!
42:49Oh, my God!
42:49Oh, my God!
42:49Oh, my God!
42:52What?
42:55Is that how we talked?
42:56Yeah.
42:56Have some respect.
42:57OK.
42:57Go on.
43:02Josh, would you like to answer that, please?
43:05Um, I think you should put the perfume bottle in something first.
43:10Oh, my God!
43:11Oh, my God!
43:12Oh!
43:14Thank you!
43:15Oh, my God!
43:16Thank you so much for watching!
43:18Good night!
43:19Good night!
43:20Mr. Fluffy!
43:22I'm so sorry!
43:25Bye!
43:29Bye!
43:29I'm so sorry!
43:33Go!
43:34Bye, Robbie!
43:35Go!
43:38That's what he does!
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