- 18 minutes ago
After Granny chases off an IRS agent, Mr. Drysdale tells him the story of how the Clampetts came to be rich and move to Beverly Hills.
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00:00Come and listen to my story about a man named Jed
00:02A poor mountaineer barely kept his family fed
00:05And then one day he was shooting at some food
00:07And up through the ground come a bubbling crude
00:11Oil, that is, black gold, Texas tea
00:16Well, the first thing you know, old Jed's a millionaire
00:18The kinfolk said, Jed, move away from there
00:21Said, California is the place you ought to be
00:24So they loaded up the truck and they moved to Beverly
00:26Hills, that is, swimming pools, movie stars
00:31The Beverly Hillbilly
01:07You hear me, mister?
01:09You get going and get going, thanks
01:11Now, madam, I don't think you understand
01:13I'm from the Internal Revenue Service
01:15That's the Department of the...
01:18Pop in that puddle jumper and cut mud out of here
01:21But I only want to talk about Mr. Kleinfeld's return
01:23He ain't going nowhere
01:26And if you keep hanging around here, you ain't going nowhere neither
01:31Now, see here, madam, I insist
01:39I'll be back
01:40I'll be waiting
01:46What's all the ruckus, Granny? Who was that?
01:48That blame Revenue
01:49Well, you sure?
01:51Came right out and admitted it himself
01:53Hmm, well, we don't want no trouble with the law
01:55And besides, you said you were going to stop running your steel
01:57I ain't been
01:58But I don't want no Revenue or snooping around
02:01They're the lowest form of varmints
02:03Even he was ashamed of being one
02:05What?
02:06Called it the Infernal Revenue Service
02:12Internal Revenue Service?
02:13That's right
02:15Well, sit down, sit down
02:17Thank you
02:19Well, now, it's a pleasure to have you visit my struggling little bank
02:22You're right?
02:24You?
02:30Here we are
02:32Yes, it's always a pleasure to see you splendid chaps in the Internal Revenue Service
02:38You know, I was just, I was just talking to my tax man yesterday
02:43Aspen?
02:43No
02:45Mr. Drysdale
02:47I'm not here to talk about your income tax return
02:51You're not?
02:52No
02:53But your tax man did handle the return for Mr. J.D. Clampett
02:57Right?
02:58Oh, yes, yes
02:59Mr. Clampett is my largest depositor
03:01Wonderful man
03:02Salt of the earth
03:03Honest as a day is long
03:05Lovely family
03:06Mr. Drysdale
03:07I was just fired on by a member of that lovely family
03:13Fired on, you mean shot on?
03:14With a double-barrel 12-gauge shotgun
03:17Wielded expertly by a little old lady
03:19No bigger than this
03:20Granny
03:21Now, Mr. Lannan, you, you have to understand these people
03:25Oh, I understood her fine
03:26What I don't understand is this
03:28How can a man show an income of millions for last year
03:31And not one red penny for all the years previous?
03:34Oh, well, well, I, I can explain that
03:37Well, the Treasury Department will appreciate it
03:39Now, this is the beautiful mansion you just visited, right?
03:45Well, I would hardly call it a visit
03:48Skirmish might be a better word
03:50This is the house, yes
03:52Hey, Mr. Lannan
03:53Would you believe that eight months ago
03:55They lived here?
03:57No, frankly, I wouldn't
03:59Now, give you my word
04:00The poorest, most uninformed people imaginable
04:03If I would an oil company try to explore their swamp
04:06Old Jed's daughter hit him with a rock
04:07Thought he was a revenuer
04:17What'd you got there?
04:18Stranger
04:20Where'd you get him?
04:21I'd be in him with a rock
04:23What for?
04:24He was skulking around down by the slough
04:26Figured he might be a revenuer
04:28He's no revenuer
04:30Then can I keep him?
04:33Of course not
04:34Well, I called him
04:35Don't matter
04:36Well, he won't be no trouble
04:38I could keep him out in the smokehouse
04:39Ellie Mae, you can't keep people like they were dogs and cats
04:44Who's that?
04:45Some feller Ellie found nosing around
04:48Being with a rock, so it'd be easier to tote
04:51There are fellas from the Petroleum Company
04:54What's a Petroleum?
04:55I don't know
04:56He asked me if he could do some wildcatting down by the slough
05:00I said, help yourself
05:01We're glad to get rid of the critters
05:03What'd he say?
05:04Just kind of laughed
05:05The laughs on him
05:07There ain't no wildcats down there at that slough
05:09Heck no
05:10It's too full of oil
05:14Are you trying to tell me they didn't know oil was valuable?
05:18Even when the oil company geologists told them
05:20They didn't understand
05:23Mr. Clampett
05:23That swamp of yours is full of oil
05:26I could have told you that
05:27Well, my company would like to pump it out
05:29Yeah, I'd like that too
05:31But I just can't afford to have it done
05:34Oh, no, no
05:34You don't understand
05:35You see, you wouldn't have to pay for it
05:37Oh, I don't take favors from strangers
05:41No, no, no, Mr. Clampett
05:42You see, you're a very rich man
05:46Stranger, if money was skunk oil
05:48A hound dog couldn't smell me
05:50But it's a swamp
05:52My company will buy that land
05:54Why, they'll raise so many derricks down there
05:56That, son, I gotta be honest with you
05:57You couldn't raise turnips down there
06:00He's right
06:01That ground looks black and rich
06:03But it's so greasy
06:04You can just squeeze the oil out of it
06:07But that's what my company wants
06:10Maybe you better sit down for a spell
06:14Why, even after Mr. Clampett sold his swamp
06:17He didn't know how much money he'd gotten
06:19Until his cousin Pearl heard the news
06:21And came rushing over
06:23Ezra, stop this thing
06:25Stop it
06:25Hold on, Ezra
06:27Hail and protect us
06:32Oh, Ezra
06:39You think they hit us, kid?
06:41Oh, but I think they sure want the chicken house
06:46Oh, I'm sure sorry about the chicken house
06:49But nobody got hurt
06:54Jampro, I told you to get rid of them worn-out breaks
06:58I did, Ma
06:59That's how come we ain't got none
07:02Get on out and lift the chicken house back on his foundation
07:07Jed?
07:08Jed, Ellie Mae came running over to my place
07:11And she said you sold the swamp to some oil company
07:15Well, yeah, I guess I did
07:19What did they pay you for it?
07:22Well, they ain't paid me nothing yet
07:24That rooster fellow said he'd bring the money later
07:26How much they gonna pay you?
07:29Well, he said I'd depend some on how much oil they could pump up
07:33Well, he must have mentioned some figure
07:35What was it?
07:36Well, now, Pearl, you know that old swamp weren't worth
07:39Shucks
07:40Jed, Clampett, you got slicked and you're ashamed to admit it
07:43That's just what I told you
07:45Granny, how much they gonna pay him?
07:47All right, I'll tell you
07:48He said it'd run somewhere between $25 and $100
07:50$25 and $100?
07:52I know it don't sound like much
07:54But Mr. Brewster seemed to set great store
07:56By the fact he's gonna pay me in some new kind of dollar
07:59There ain't no new kind of dollar
08:02Well, it's new to me
08:03I've heard of gold dollars, silver dollars, paper dollars
08:06But he said he's gonna pay me in, uh
08:08What do you call them, Granny?
08:11Million dollars
08:14Yeah, that's it
08:16Million dollars
08:18Well, he wrote the whole thing out on this piece of paper
08:21Here, you can see for yourself
08:22I don't know nothing about that
08:24Let's see here
08:27Thanks in heaven
08:30Granny, give me the jug
08:33It's empty, but I'll fit some
08:34I'll go, Granny
08:39Jed
08:39Jed
08:43You're a millionaire
08:45A millionaire
08:46Yeah, that's what that Brewster fella kept calling me
08:49I didn't know just how to take it
08:51You mean, you're rich
08:54Me?
08:54The richest man in these hills
08:57Maybe in the whole state
08:58Oh, Jed
09:00You can have anything you want
09:02Do anything you want
09:04Go any place you want
09:06Yeah, that's another thing he kept saying
09:09He said he reckoned I'd be moving away from here soon
09:11What do you think, Pearl?
09:13You think I ought to move?
09:15Jed
09:16How can you even ask?
09:18Look around you
09:20You're eight miles from your nearest neighbor
09:22You're overrun with skunks
09:24Possums
09:25Coyotes
09:26Bobcats
09:27You use kerosene lamps for light
09:29You cook on a wood stove
09:30Summer and winter
09:31You're drinking homemade moonshine
09:34Washing with homemade lye soap
09:36And your bathroom is 50 feet from the house
09:39And you ask should you move?
09:44Yeah, I reckon you're right
09:47Man'd be a dang fool to leave all this
10:00You know, Mr. Drysdale
10:02In the Internal Revenue Service
10:03We hear some pretty wild stories
10:05But this corn-pone-de-caviar saga of Jed Clampett tops everything
10:09Well, if you think it's been unbelievable so far
10:12Wait until you hear the rest of it
10:13What I can't understand is
10:15How a man so insulated from the rest of the world
10:17Ever heard about Beverly Hills, California?
10:19I can explain that in two words
10:21Cousin Pearl
10:23She's the one who had her sights set on California
10:27Oh, there you are, Jed
10:30You misunderstood me
10:32I meant you should move away
10:35And you know where I'd go if I was you?
10:37Where?
10:39California
10:40California?
10:42California?
10:42Yes, sir
10:42Beverly Hills, California
10:44I hear telly it's full of millionaires out there
10:48And movie stars, too
10:49In what?
10:51Movie stars
10:54Jed, remember the time that your pa took us to Eureka Springs to see the movie picture?
11:01Yeah
11:01Well, the actors that make their movie pictures live in Beverly Hills
11:08Go on
11:09Yes
11:12Well, doggie
11:13Wouldn't there be some living in the same neck of the woods with old-town necks?
11:19It shall work, and we could come visit you
11:24Yes
11:25Yes, it was Cousin Pearl who planted the idea of moving to Beverly Hills, but it was Mr. Brewster who
11:29made it possible
11:30Now, who's he?
11:32Vice President of the oil company that bought Mr. Clampett's land
11:35Yes, Brewster's often told me the story of that fateful evening
11:40Well, your cousin is right about that, Mr. Clampett
11:43Beverly Hills is a choice residential area, and lots of millionaires do settle there
11:48Folks like me, huh?
11:50Well, uh, millionaires
11:52And movie stars, too
11:54Oh, yeah, yeah
11:56Is Tom Mix there?
11:57No, I'm afraid Mr. Mix is dead
12:00Huh?
12:02Oh, yeah
12:03What's the matter with me?
12:06Remember Pearl? He got shot at the end of that picture
12:12Well, there are plenty of other movie stars, and that's where Jed wants to live
12:16Ain't it, Jed?
12:19I do like the notion of living in the hills
12:22Never could stand flat country
12:24Mr. Clampett, I think it only fair
12:27That is, well, I think you may have a wrong idea about Beverly Hills
12:32Is that where you live?
12:33No, my home is in Tulsa
12:35Well, see, maybe you could get us a place there in your neighborhood
12:41Mr. Clampett, let's not beat around the bush
12:43You will love Beverly Hills
12:47Then that's it
12:48Can you steer Jed onto a good place?
12:50No, I can get the bank out there to handle it for him
12:53He'd like a nice big place
12:56With plenty of room for his kinfolk to visit him
13:03Is the foreigner staying to supper?
13:06I'm ashamed to say I ain't asked him, how about it?
13:08Oh, I don't think so
13:10Oh, no trouble
13:11What you cooking tonight, Granny?
13:13Mustard greens and possum innards
13:16Did you hear that, Mr. Brewster?
13:19Very clever
13:20Can you change your mind?
13:22Uh, not this time
13:24Well, if you could happily come back tomorrow
13:27We'll be having leftovers
13:28That's the thing about possum innards
13:30He's just as good the second day
13:35What a family
13:36So, anyway, they packed up and came to Beverly Hills
13:40Well, it wasn't quite that simple
13:42Mr. Clampett had his problems
13:43With 25 million dollars, he had problems?
13:46Ah, yes
13:47The first one was his daughter
13:48She didn't want to leave her friends
13:50Friends?
13:51And I thought they lived in a completely unpopulated area
13:54They did
13:55Her friends were not the kind you and I have
14:00Now, I ain't gonna be here to look after you no more
14:03So you're gonna have to keep yourself out of trouble
14:06Watch out for them coyotes and them bobcats
14:09And them hunters with guns
14:11Stay out of folks' gardens
14:13Cause you know how it riles up Granny when you're getting hers
14:17Except in when we're gone
14:18You can have everything that's left
14:21I'm sorry there ain't gonna be room enough on a truck to take you along
14:26But maybe you wouldn't like California anyhow
14:32Maybe I ain't gonna like it either
14:35If I don't, then I'mma come and hightailin' it right back here
14:38And me and you will set up housekeeping all by ourselves
14:42Ellie? Ellie Mae?
14:44Yeah, Pa, over here
14:50You feelin' alright, Ellie? You didn't eat your supper
14:53Sure, Pa, I just wasn't hungry
14:56Cold? You're shaking like a sumac leaf
15:00No, Pa, I ain't cold
15:02I'm scared
15:04Scared?
15:06Why?
15:07There ain't nothin' in this woods can hurt you, even in the dark
15:11It ain't the woods or the dark
15:14It's goin' so far away
15:16I don't know what it's gonna be like out there in Beverly Hills
15:20Why, it's gonna be just like here
15:22Except we'll have things a lot nicer
15:26Will I go to school and wear fancy dresses like city girls
15:29And put powder on my face
15:32And get my hair all fixed up in one of them there beauty parlors?
15:35Why, sure you will
15:38Then I ain't gone
15:41Granny?
15:43I want you to meet the Clampets under different circumstances
15:46You'll find them to be really charming people
15:49Uh, including Granny?
15:51Oh yes, this time you'll get a completely different reception
15:54I promise you
16:09I'll blast him before he gets through that gate
16:22I'll blast him before he gets through that gate
16:25That's putting it mildly
16:26The way he tells us, he just downright refused to budge
16:33Now, what's all this nonsense about you ain't goin' to California?
16:37Ain't no nonsense to it
16:40If the good lord hada wanted me in California, he'da put me in California
16:45Well, if he's just gettin' around to it
16:47The book says he moves in mysterious ways
16:51Well, if he moves me, I'll go
16:53But you and Big Jethro ain't a-budgin' me
16:58Granny, I guess your Beverly Hills sounds like the kind of place you'd like
17:01That Britcher fella says they got smogs out there
17:06What's a smog?
17:07Well, me and Jethro figured out that's a small hog
17:12And you heard what Pearl said
17:14Ain't got no snow out there
17:15You could run your steel year-round
17:17Run us the year-round here
17:19Yeah, but walkin' down through the snow to the steel
17:22Always makes you feel so miserable
17:25I might feel miserable walkin' down
17:28But the way I feel's comin' back makes up for it
17:33Hey, Beverly, Granny
17:35We've been plannin' and talkin' about this trip for days
17:38You never said you wouldn't go
17:40Never said I would, neither
17:42But that Britcher fella has bought us a house in them Beverly Hills
17:45He sent our $25 million to the bank out there
17:47Well, you just chase on out after it
17:50I'm stayin' right here
17:52And I ain't a-feared neither
17:56Granny, I ain't a-leavin' you here alone
17:58And I ain't a-budgin' out of this rocker
18:02Let her roll, Jethro
18:09Only a man of Jed Clampett's strength and authority could have handled Granny
18:14He'll be there when we get to the Clampett place, won't he?
18:16Oh, sure, you have nothing to worry about
18:19There's the entrance up ahead
18:21Yes, I know
18:27There's the car stoppin' at the gate, Granny
18:32They closed the gates since I left
18:34I'll get it
18:35You know, this reminds me of an experience I had when the Clampetts first moved in
18:39I was leaving, and found the gates closed
18:58Hello
19:00Mr. Clampett, can you hear me?
19:02Yeah, I can hear you
19:03Good, good, I need your help
19:10Sounds like you're inside the wall
19:12I am, would you let me out, please?
19:15Well, you bet I will
19:18You stay right where you are
19:19I'll get me an axe and have you out of there in no time
19:24He demolished ten feet of wall before I could stop him
19:32Granny, Mr. Trosdale's opened the gate
19:35Good, he's leadin' that revenuer right into a trap
20:05I wanna get it, Mr. Revenor
20:09We can't shoot him
20:10We ain't going to shoot nobody
20:12He ain't nobody
20:13Revenuers and buzzards don't count
20:15Go on inside and cook up some biddles
20:18Since when is a revenuer coming?
20:21Mr. Clampett, I'd like you to meet Mr. Landman
20:23I'd like you to meet Mr. Clampett
20:25How do you do, Mr. Landman?
20:26Since you're a friend of Mr. Drydale's here, I reckon you're welcome
20:29But as you can see, we don't cut the revenuers
20:32I'm not a revenuer, Mr. Clampett
20:34I guess back in the hills where you come from, I'd be a tax collector
20:38Back in the hills where I come from, you'd be a lot younger
20:40Oh? Was the climate that healthy?
20:43Oh, it's just you wouldn't have lived to get this old
20:48Ed, is the revenuer staying to supper?
20:50He ain't no revenuer
20:51Well, is the furriner staying to supper?
20:54How about it, Mr. Landman? You too, Mr. Drydale
20:57You're not by any chance cooking mustard greens and possum innards, are you?
21:01Not tonight
21:02Oh, we had them last night
21:04I'll stay
21:05I'll stay, me too
21:05Tonight we is having leftovers
21:11That's the thing about possum innards
21:12He's just as good the second day
21:38Well, now it's time to say goodbye to Jed and all his kin
21:41They would like to thank you folks for kindly dropping in
21:45You're all invited back next week to this locality
21:48To have a heaping helping of their hospitality
21:52Hillbilly, that is
21:53Set a spell
21:55Take your shoes off
21:56Y'all come back now
21:58Y'all come back now
22:08This has been a Filmways presentation
22:11So, once again
22:11Did I have an allocationία?
22:13Let's go to tomb in here
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