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00:00:16Hello there everybody and you're all very welcome to the show and I hope that you enjoy what happens
00:00:20here over the next hour or so. And to find out who our first guest is let me hand you
00:00:25over to
00:00:25our emcee for the evening, the beautiful Fred Cook. Tommy our first guest is Mr Niall Horan.
00:00:39How are you fellas? Good to see you.
00:00:43Are you anything to Bishop James Horan? Weirdly enough no. I could be though. It's a long line
00:00:52of Horan's out there somewhere. Where in the country are you from? From Mullingar.
00:00:57Good time. Great time. What was it like growing up there? How old are you? I'm 32, 33 this year.
00:01:05It was great. Really? Yeah well we didn't have a ton. My father worked at Tesco for 30 odd years
00:01:16and just had lived in a you know two up two down. Yeah. How's an estate like? How's an estate?
00:01:22Great. Yeah yeah and we grew up there and yeah big it's a very very middle of Ireland market town
00:01:32upbringing which I'm sure you can relate to yourself. Well when I grew up in a housing estate as well
00:01:37and
00:01:37what I remembered and what I loved about it maybe I wasn't aware of at the time was just the
00:01:43community
00:01:44of kids outside the front door. Yeah. So did you have that as well? Absolutely. Well that's all we knew
00:01:51you
00:01:51know we didn't we didn't have loads but we didn't need it either we didn't know anything different
00:01:57and yeah just very very normal stuff. Get up in the morning, go to school. My father worked at Tesco
00:02:03so he'd
00:02:04get the the milk delivery man to drop off a pint a little pint of Avonmore and put it on
00:02:10the doorstep
00:02:11so when I get up for school because he was working at night yeah I'd come down in the morning
00:02:14and he
00:02:15would bring in deliveries in Tesco and then I get up in the morning school and then recite a couple
00:02:22of
00:02:22your DVDs back to front on the way to on the way to school. Filth? Filth? I was 14 Tommy.
00:02:30Oh Lord blesses and save us mate. Sorry about that. Yeah yeah yeah. A different kind of curriculum.
00:02:36Yeah very different to what I went in to learn that morning yeah. But yeah just go to school in
00:02:42CBS
00:02:43and Mullingar. Walk there, walk back, come in do your homework, watch The Simpsons home and away.
00:02:51Yeah. Extenders. Who else who else was at home when you were going to play brothers and sisters and stuff?
00:02:56Yeah an older brother I mean my parents split when we were when I was four five maybe and then
00:03:03was kind
00:03:03of a jump between the two for a while yeah. Right okay. But as I got older I just I
00:03:10felt like I was quite
00:03:11emotionally aware like I just I feel like I understood all right well they just don't love each other
00:03:17and you know what I mean like and I remember thinking that and I'm being nearly all right
00:03:22with it you know I had the weekends with my father we go across to England we support Derby County.
00:03:28What? Funnily enough you're not the first man that ever gave that reaction
00:03:34and we'd go across. Never mind being parents separating when you were five. How do you end up supporting Derby?
00:03:42Well he's, my father's 66 this year and early 70s Brian Clough, he was the manager at Derby.
00:03:51Yeah yeah. We got promoted, we won the league back-to-back promotions and he was you know the
00:03:56king at the time and it was my father listening on the wireless and it was either Leeds United or
00:04:01it
00:04:01was Derby County which you know and thankfully he picked Derby County but sometimes I thank him for it.
00:04:07Yeah but then we would he'd bring us across you know whatever money he had was spent at Derby County
00:04:13and to this day is still the same he's over there every other week. The schlepping around the UK I've
00:04:20done to watch that team. Time with Dad. Yeah. That sounds brilliant. That was great like the the memories of
00:04:29those days you know he that's what he had you know to give us was big football and days out
00:04:35you know
00:04:37and great trips that we went on and things like that we loved it and just having that having as
00:04:42we're
00:04:43going back to what we're saying having a bit of that balance was was good you know my mother lived
00:04:48out
00:04:48in the countryside and then I was getting to an age where I wanted to be in town with the
00:04:51lads and
00:04:52yeah school was in town and you know things like that so I I just kind of wanted to be
00:04:59in town a
00:04:59little bit more um but we found you know it was it worked itself out they always do they're all
00:05:04there's hardships but yeah they tend to work well some of the time they work themselves out. What are
00:05:09the hardships do you think? Well them figuring it out okay I'd imagine yeah yeah like how to be
00:05:17not together yeah having two kids I was only five six something like that and then I'm learning
00:05:27about me and they're that can be god knows yeah yeah that's that's a conversation that's the lesson
00:05:34happened um I imagine though that coming back from matches with Dad and back into school on Monday
00:05:43you must have been like a legend because who else had who else has that experience of going to see
00:05:50English football matches? Well I felt like that to be honest yeah like I did because you know I've been
00:05:55going to Premier League at this point when I was a child I went to my first Derby game when
00:05:58I was about
00:06:00six and uh coming back and having seen Steven Gerrard playing. Did fellas ever hit you? Never for
00:06:08supporting Derby? No no never. Did people ever try and persuade you what are you doing? Oh no they
00:06:12say that and then give me the reaction you gave me but uh yeah you know it was yeah I
00:06:19felt I felt like
00:06:19about this is what I have you know I can sing a little bit at this I'm the fellow that
00:06:24goes across
00:06:25to England every week and wears a Derby county jersey to gold football jersey day. When did you notice the
00:06:32the singing thing has been uh something that other people noticed? Um when I was uh early primary
00:06:42school like little carol services that we'd have in the hall and um I remember I got I had a
00:06:48teacher
00:06:49called Ann Caulfield Miss Caulfield who I still speak to to this day um she was my ended up being
00:06:55my third
00:06:55class teacher but she was ahead of it she was the woman that played the piano and sorted out everyone's
00:07:00solo parts and the away in a manger and things like that and she would give them to me. Give
00:07:05us a
00:07:05give us a blast of it there. Away here. It's a bit deeper these days. A manger no crib for
00:07:14a bed.
00:07:17You're welcome. The little Lord Jesus laid down his sweet head. Thank you. God you do have a lovely voice
00:07:30nice. It's a bit deeper than it was back then though mind you. Beautiful sound it's gorgeous um so
00:07:37your teacher is the first person that you actually kind of. Yeah and I um yeah and I played Oliver
00:07:42in
00:07:43in Oliver um in about fourth class fifth class or something like that maybe fourth class and uh and
00:07:50then I went to secondary school and I went to uh like a very a CBS sort of generally quite
00:07:55like Gaelic
00:07:56football led and um things like that and yeah I can this is where I started to get a little
00:08:02bit
00:08:02like lost a little bit because I wasn't I mean I'm not the biggest lad of all time and and
00:08:07I was very
00:08:07small then and you know I was one of those fellas that if you gave me a ball I'd look
00:08:11like I knew what
00:08:11I was doing with it. Don't put someone near me though. Solo artist. Yes correct. If I could just stand
00:08:19over there in the corner and you all stay away from me uh but uh yeah I just I did
00:08:24I was a bit of a
00:08:25coward in that sense that I didn't uh I didn't fit in in that. I was mates with all the
00:08:31lads that played.
00:08:32Yeah yeah. It was no good himself um and then I had this teacher um Georgina Ainskopf she was my
00:08:38French teacher from first year I'm still very pally with her now and she kind of she was on the
00:08:44arts
00:08:44of your side um and just kind of started putting on she knew that I was into it and um
00:08:51she started
00:08:52putting on talent shows and how did she know that you were into it? I don't know maybe someone was
00:08:59telling her or maybe I was singing on the off chance and she heard me or do you remember what
00:09:03type of
00:09:03music you were into back then? Well I grew up on a lot of like again I was kind of
00:09:08different to kids my
00:09:09age then and now that we're talking about them it was quite different um I was into like the Eagles
00:09:14and um anything Laurel Canyon in the 70s and what the f**k? I don't know what kind of a model
00:09:21upbringing
00:09:22the Eagles in Derby County this fella's a mad limit but yeah I uh we got into that I had
00:09:30a vinyl
00:09:30player at home and it was just like I remember little like Lionel Richie singles on vinyl at home
00:09:38and things like that and that like that whose house was this in this is mom's house this was a
00:09:44now a
00:09:45shared record player it seemed uh it was a shared collection of theirs and they had the the you
00:09:49know the the vinyl boxes with the yeah the clips on them my mother still has actually I was looking
00:09:54through them recently some crackers in there um so yeah it was just that's what I was brought up on
00:10:01so I was kind of old heads young shoulders I suppose in that sense
00:10:08it's a good quirky isn't it yeah it's interesting yeah so what happened then with the
00:10:15with the did you go to university after school or anything no I finished fifth year and then went
00:10:20on the x-factor and I should probably know this should I I don't know I don't know I'm sure
00:10:28there's a lot let me get this right you play end up playing for Westmeath is that where the Tories
00:10:32go
00:10:32yeah if they corner forward I know you know you're nothing to the bishop in the airport at all
00:10:40went in the x-factor when I was 16 and uh never had a leave insert or anything like that
00:10:46and how does that how does the move to london and never moved and that was it now that's for
00:10:51people
00:10:51who are very familiar with your story they probably take that stuff for granted that's jaw dropping to
00:10:56me uh how did you get on the x-factor well I made it through a few rounds no were
00:11:01they going around
00:11:03mullingar looking for sad kids in
00:11:08part of an outreach program
00:11:13him yeah we'll have him the sad little in the derby jersey
00:11:20he's no friends with the sad eyes he can only play football by himself he'd be perfect
00:11:28i went over they were doing it was the first year they'd done uh auditions in ireland
00:11:33and i just was watching the previous season then one christmas and my
00:11:39that french teacher georgina basically forced me to fill in
00:11:42uh a form for it and um and i just went for it
00:11:50when you're from when you're from little towns like that you feel like that is so far removed
00:11:56that the self-belief nearly you nearly have to be born with a self-belief
00:12:02so off up to dublin for the yeah it's cued with about 10 000 people outside croke park at
00:12:07five in the morning and went through uh five four or five rounds before you get to the television part
00:12:13of it and then all of a sudden you're in front of you're on a tv set and you're you're
00:12:18there and i'm
00:12:19this is my first basically outside of a school talent show this is my first now experience of
00:12:26anything this is into the that the thunder dome where it happens where the people scream and yeah
00:12:31like you know you've seen it yourself like a crowd get up
00:12:35very scary i wouldn't say it was the best thing and i've ever done
00:12:38who went over to england which i basically went to my own then because you used to go over
00:12:43um went over to london there's a round in wembley arena it was like called boot camp got through
00:12:50that round anyway then they pulled they pulled all the men's boys category back on the stage
00:12:57and then Simon Cowell uh named out five people and uh we were now a band and then
00:13:08that was basically it then i barely came home after that and what was the idea the idea is that
00:13:13uh we put you five lads together and you were you must have some sort of an awareness oh there's
00:13:22a
00:13:22boy band thing bubbling here well i i'd spent a bit of time with these lads over the week we
00:13:29were
00:13:29a similar age we were there for a week sitting out in steps anyway no four english i was the
00:13:34only irish
00:13:35who were the other lads like Harry Styles Liam Payne Zayn Malik Louis Tomlinson
00:13:42so they're all lads from the north of the midlands in the north of england yeah i was the only
00:13:46irish
00:13:46did you win the competition no we came third okay um and then then the x-factor finished and then
00:13:54it was
00:13:56right we're a band now this is and we luckily enough from from the jump
00:14:02got on very well like we were we were like kids on christmas morning like you know and we felt
00:14:08like
00:14:08we were in we've been in the same class um and you're so you're all around 17 18 now yeah
00:14:14i was
00:14:14yeah just gone 17 and um and then it just kicked off out of made this song called what makes
00:14:23you
00:14:23beautiful and then went to we went on like a promotional trip i remember the first time i ever
00:14:29thought wow because you feel a bit of madness around the uk around ireland and then we went on
00:14:35promotional trip to uh we went to stockholm milan berlin and amsterdam i think four days in a row and
00:14:47just
00:14:47turning up in these places that i never even thought i'd go near and seeing this madness going on like
00:14:56stuff you could only you've seen in movies um was that was when i was like oh wow this is
00:15:05this is some
00:15:06different stuff going on here um when did you start earning money when did like when did unusual lumps
00:15:14of money come in you go okay i remember getting a a merch deal come in one time the first
00:15:20one
00:15:22and i remember you know what our manager were got help with a um like a financial advisor um
00:15:31accounting scenario and this person was very good explained it all in layman's terms yeah because i
00:15:37probably failed business it's a junior cert um and just not looking at it and i've seen that figure
00:15:47before somewhere and maybe on the telly or something um and i don't want to know anything about future
00:15:54monies but i'd like to know that amount at that time and what what it meant to you so you
00:16:00could tell
00:16:01me how much it was for well it was you know 500 grand and you were how old seven eight
00:16:10eighteen
00:16:13what the and you're like i like like you could nearly laugh at it now because i just can't
00:16:22like the hairs on my neck have gone yeah i've stood up at the idea of the story you've been
00:16:28telling me and
00:16:2917 17. do you start crying no but i just remember being how how is this even real like
00:16:47and not what do i do with it you know like so i just put this lock it away in
00:16:54a room somewhere
00:16:57um and just i remember the first thing i want to do is sort out the family obviously like that
00:17:03was a
00:17:03given but like just being at first just being in shock and just be like
00:17:10like i'd probably have this money for the rest of my life like it's like your communion money
00:17:14much bigger obviously but you know what i mean like you at the time you feel like i must
00:17:20hold on and and rightly so like when you it's it's like it's i don't even have to describe it
00:17:27to
00:17:27you like you're questioning me on it and i actually don't even know how to like yeah
00:17:32so the rocket takes off and you fly around space for a while five years
00:17:43how how do you cope with that stopping like are you half delighted it stops when it stops or
00:17:51what what happens to you when you realize all right lads we're done here yeah um
00:18:00i remember just like it it's we knew it was coming to an end about a year out you have
00:18:06to plan
00:18:07obviously right we're not going to make another album we're not going to make another tour so it was
00:18:11a slow but you're still going no it's not going to it's not going to stop yeah no this'll all
00:18:16just
00:18:16the engines and start back up and the rocket will take off again um and um and i just remember
00:18:25being
00:18:25like just sad it was over um just because it was a great we had a great time i mean
00:18:31like traveling the
00:18:33world planted you know for two for two or three of those years we were playing to an average of
00:18:39about
00:18:3965 000 people at night like for in every corner of the globe but i was just loving it like
00:18:45i was
00:18:46just having the greatest time ever can you tell me um when you walk out in front of a crowd
00:18:50that big
00:18:50and uh it's a a fairly high percentage of screaming young ones
00:18:59i mean how do you cope with ordinary women after that no i mean um what's the what what's the
00:19:04physical
00:19:05how does that affect your body what happens to your body what what's the physical feeling of that
00:19:09noise in you tell you what before i go into the feeling like i always wanted to make sure that
00:19:16like
00:19:16the lads will tell you this if you were to question about it like i never wanted to look i
00:19:21won't never
00:19:21wanted that to be normal to me because if you go on a stadium tour for six months of the
00:19:28year
00:19:29all over the planet and that you allow that to become normal you've lost the plot and i just
00:19:36told myself that i was always going to enjoy it and i and i still to this day like tell
00:19:41myself just like
00:19:42take it all look into the eyes of the people look around but you could feel
00:19:47you know you could feel that energy that is just
00:19:50i can't like people always say what's that what is that like people always ask me and i still can't
00:19:55really
00:19:58tell you it's just like the it feels like every drop of blood in your body just rush to the
00:20:02front
00:20:03and every time are you in control your body when it happens
00:20:10yeah because you know you have a job to do it you know you can relate to this where you
00:20:15might be
00:20:15nervous for something or like i was very nervous coming out here to chat to you today because i
00:20:20grew up living and breathing every word to come out your mouth
00:20:24um young kids wouldn't even say that to me
00:20:31but i like i i'm just when i sit down in the chair that i know i i'm here for
00:20:37a reason
00:20:37so i actually right this thing in my hand what it's a g cut right play that and then you're
00:20:43off you know
00:20:44lovely um join us after the break and Niall is going to stay with us
00:21:05so the thing which i was asking you about um when it when you all when you all have an
00:21:13awareness okay this is
00:21:17um coming to an end
00:21:21was part of you glad to kind of okay let's see what's next i'm so young um yeah i think
00:21:28there's
00:21:28there's a fine line there of fear and excitement of what's next like luckily enough i've gotten it you
00:21:34know i got into the writing side of things and i fancy myself to go into a room and try
00:21:40and write a tune
00:21:40um and felt like if i did that enough something's gonna happen well fingers crossed and um straight
00:21:48away then like i didn't want to go home and sit down again another footballer analogy like it
00:21:54they're like don't know what to do with themselves after they've retired or something like it felt like
00:21:57but you're like 25 26 or something what was i 22? was i 22? jesus christ yeah go on i
00:22:04don't know what it
00:22:04was i was 23 maybe um and uh i was excited about the prospect of making an album i think
00:22:12people knew me
00:22:15and knew what type of music i was going to make so i wasn't going to shock anyone with coming
00:22:19out
00:22:19with some sort of mad tones but um i was excited about that but i was also a fear like
00:22:24of like
00:22:26at 22 this could be it you know what i mean like the last five years could have been everything
00:22:30and by the way it would have been enough a hell of a five years but at that time
00:22:35you're catastrophizing everything do you know what i mean you're 22 you don't you know nothing
00:22:39really though you've seen a bit of the world and had to grow up a lot faster than your average
00:22:4216 17 18 19 year old um but you're still going this could be this could be it now like
00:22:51um yeah
00:22:54i know my knowledge of pop bands isn't great was Liam in your band yeah
00:23:05um so people i'm sure everybody but maybe some people my age you don't know Liam
00:23:10passed away was it last year yeah
00:23:19uh
00:23:23sorry for your loss thanks
00:23:41i know you must have been shocked but were you surprised
00:23:46um shock was definitely the first thing um i had was playing a gig in
00:23:53Buenos Aires about two weeks previous and he would he was in Buenos Aires for some reason
00:24:00and we met up and we had a chat he came around to my hotel room in the daytime and
00:24:07and we had a coffee and then he came to the gig and um
00:24:14i came to the gig that night then he was in the dressing room before and then
00:24:20yeah he came to the show geez it was great to see Liam uh tour ends then i finished in
00:24:26Colombia then
00:24:26about a week later went home i was only home about after a big long stint in the road end
00:24:32of the tour
00:24:34and then i was just at home one night i don't know what day of the week it was can't
00:24:38remember um
00:24:39um and just looked down at my phone i had gotten a text i was just about to go to
00:24:43sleep and you know
00:24:44and the phone lights up and you have a look one last look
00:24:47and i was just
00:24:52pure
00:24:55shock and i knew he'd had a couple of issues but i wasn't because i wasn't around him like i
00:25:04was
00:25:05previous years all the time i didn't realize to what extent or anything like that um
00:25:11um i knew there was some stuff going on but i wasn't aware of the depth um and then you
00:25:17go
00:25:18through how why the stages of grief that i probably really haven't like touched the sides on yet you
00:25:28know i grew up with this fella and um all of a sudden just it's no more it's just it's
00:25:36such a strange
00:25:37thing you go through like what could i have done if i'd known more if should i have dug more
00:25:41into
00:25:41it like could i talk to other people to get an angle on it like you go through all sorts
00:25:51of stuff
00:25:51and because i'd seen him the couple of weeks previous and i was a bit kind of like jesus yeah
00:26:01and i imagine you have uh great memories of when you were having the crack and everyone was safe
00:26:13so as i can be thinking of sometimes when somebody
00:26:20self-destructs or something in a way
00:26:25you can kind of see patterns that uh that's what i was asking about the and the shock um
00:26:36but that's that the surprise maybe wasn't as big as the shock or something
00:26:40yeah i think still just looking down at your phone that's shock and like then stupidly turning on sky news
00:26:51and then going and then the next channel and cnn and bbc and rt news and and the whole world
00:27:01was
00:27:02talking about it like it's it's the biggest breaking news on the planet at that minute and
00:27:10it's i found it like because i was in the pictures with him on sky news i found that very
00:27:17weird
00:27:19well your man beside me it's him there you know that's that's a strange one um i don't think
00:27:27i've like i don't think i've got my head around that at all really as i said i've known that
00:27:32i shared
00:27:33a room with him at one of those stages that at the x factor like i've known him since i
00:27:38was 16 years old
00:27:39and all of a sudden he's 32 and yeah i also just like kept thinking of his little son and
00:27:48things like that was was there part of the coverage that you found very distasteful and hard to deal
00:27:53with yeah there's a lot of judgment stuff going on um you know the way people love to
00:28:02these days give out about other people and be the moral authority yeah um was that difficult to
00:28:08or were you or were you good at avoiding it i have to say after i made the mistake of
00:28:12turning on the first
00:28:13time because that when i first turned it on it was the shock the fans you know on the tv
00:28:19people
00:28:20that worked with us doing interviews it was all that stuff and then
00:28:27like i just remember going no i'm not i'm not doing that i can't go any further than this because
00:28:33i've got a funeral to go to and and things like that i can't be like worrying about what they're
00:28:39going to say next because like i have my own grief to deal with like how am i going to
00:28:46deal with this
00:28:47this the the phases of and then um
00:28:53um yeah like if there's all that stuff is kind of irrelevant to me because i've like i i also
00:29:01have
00:29:01memories i get i want to think about them in that way then rather than yeah the crap they're going
00:29:07to
00:29:11talk i feel it off you you know the sadness of it i think it's because i just haven't wrapped
00:29:16my own
00:29:16head around it it's a weird thing to be going through at 30 something that someone two weeks
00:29:23older than you can just be here today gone tomorrow
00:29:32um how many albums have you released since one direction just about released me fourth
00:29:40um which i'm very excited about have you said that before each album well funnily enough
00:29:49i am though look because i i got but seriously this time i am exhausted no i am because i
00:29:54like like
00:29:56you're you grab when you graft so hard and you write so many shite songs and sure
00:30:00you have to go through the the mincer on every album that you write um create sound create a feeling
00:30:09create a mood like when you when you get to the clear water and you start getting on a bit
00:30:14of a roll
00:30:14it's a it's a nice little nice feeling i also used to get i'm enjoying it more now than ever
00:30:20my solo stuff because i obviously i went through a period of like had a big my first album had
00:30:26a big
00:30:27song that came out called slow hands and and this town did really well as well and uh and then
00:30:32you're
00:30:32feeling like you just like everything has to be as big as that and uh and then that was probably
00:30:37the
00:30:37case on my second album um and and now i'm just having toured in 24 i learned so much off
00:30:46it like
00:30:46just right so i didn't have a massive massive massive worldwide smash but this arena is full
00:30:55and i have to take something from that i also think making music i didn't realize how much of a
00:31:01milestone turning 30 was going to be for me um i i i do feel like a diff like nearly
00:31:09like a different
00:31:09person since i turned 30 like things have changed my life and i think about things differently
00:31:14you know the way i go about my music the way i think about the world of music the way
00:31:21i think about
00:31:22just life in general has changed a lot and i'm comfortable at home
00:31:27in my you know in my home life and things are just
00:31:34in a nice little spot at the moment do you need kids i don't not yet would you like to
00:31:39i'd love to
00:31:39yeah um you know i another tour man you know like you go another album another tour yeah i don't
00:31:48know
00:31:48but yeah i would um i suppose the most in in terms of getting older and stuff like that and
00:31:53the way you
00:31:53think about things is that niall horan solo is and has to be it's a different thing altogether than
00:32:04one direction do you mean it's like you're you're that was that particular thing it couldn't have been
00:32:10more successful yeah this is another thing and it has its own journey and to compare one to the other
00:32:15is you're not giving this a chance to develop if you're always comparing it to that correct
00:32:19um like i know that no matter do you know it's a great it's certainly a comfort as well it
00:32:26stops
00:32:26the chasing to know that anything you do from this point onwards will never be as big as that
00:32:32sure do you know what i mean yeah it's like right well i know i don't have to chase that
00:32:35because that's
00:32:38impossible and uh and just enjoy the fact that i've got arenas full of people coming out to see it's
00:32:46mind-boggling honestly i stand there every night and not even filling you with crap like i genuinely
00:32:51like can't believe what's going on yeah but harry's doing slain jesus just let you know slain's on sale
00:32:59today i'm coming yeah that's i mean that's something you mind yourself as well in terms of comparing
00:33:09to the other lads i mean like what harry's at is amazing delight for him like he was
00:33:18you know he always had that edge to him that you know um and that that was his thing and
00:33:24and the fans
00:33:25love them and um what he's produced since i mean it's not like you can just no they can't be
00:33:31crap you
00:33:32know like quality there you know you don't you don't do stadiums and become one of the biggest
00:33:39artists on the planet without quality so um i'm absolutely delighted for him good man um
00:33:46do you have a connection with golf am i imagining that yeah
00:33:50do you own golf or something i do yes did you buy golf i do uh no i have a
00:33:56golf management company
00:33:57what you know did you like you must be you spent the whole time just going what
00:34:05derby county if you told me if you told me that you know uh the one direction finished and i
00:34:13did the
00:34:13thing i always wanted to do i bought derby county from your dad i wouldn't do that
00:34:20um a golf management company i have uh i'm obsessed by the game really i have been since i was
00:34:28a young
00:34:28lad like i always felt like young lads that were about to turn pro and young ones were just were
00:34:34weren't very been or been looked after very well or like didn't know where they were on a tuesday when
00:34:40they were meant to be taking off on a thursday and it's kind of all up in the air and
00:34:44there was
00:34:44this you know a lot of these big companies kind of taking on every player and hope one of them
00:34:49sticks
00:34:49kind of thing and i just felt like with what i have with my management company it's boutique
00:34:57we have everything in-house in terms of what you you could translate it if you know what i mean
00:35:02yeah
00:35:02and um whether that be travel commercial you know the only thing we didn't have was people who
00:35:09worked worked in golf but i knew a few people that worked in golf and you know curated a bit
00:35:14of it
00:35:14a bit of a team and since then we've we have a leona mcguire um great irish golfer and then
00:35:23we've
00:35:23had multiple multiple wins on different tours disabled tour a men's tour women's tour um brendan lawler
00:35:31from uh loud um on the disabled side and wins all over the world and yeah we're the only thing
00:35:40we
00:35:41don't have is a major championship we'd like that um what's the ring that you're wearing
00:35:51this is the a ring that my girlfriend got me about a year into
00:35:55us being together as underneath it has the coordinates of where we met and it just says
00:36:02x for x marks a spot that doesn't leave my finger i'm not even married and i'm afraid to lose
00:36:06it
00:36:09what's her name her name is emilia emilia and where is she from she's from just outside of birmingham
00:36:15south of birmingham yeah i'm gonna ask you one more question um about mullingar and going up there and
00:36:32thinking about it now
00:36:37and how your life has changed so much um and that your decency is still
00:36:49very very visible um
00:36:55is it a complicated thing meeting people in that you used to hang out with or thinking back or
00:37:02um
00:37:04i wouldn't say it's complicated no i think um i'd be very lucky to feel that they have the town
00:37:14has a
00:37:14sense of pride um over me and nearly an ownership over me you know uh which is um that's a
00:37:24great feeling
00:37:25like um i just loved it love that town uh the people in it the characters it's the kind of
00:37:33place you
00:37:33kind of you leave and then you just slot back into like um this country in general to be honest
00:37:41like
00:37:41you travel all over this place and just feels like one big pat on the back it's it's a nice
00:37:50it's a nice feeling the world knows what we're like it's isn't a kind of it's also kind of the
00:37:57way
00:37:57people say hello to you yeah yeah yeah it's kind of very you know i find it very funny but
00:38:04it's just so
00:38:04casual like you've never seen this person before Niall honestly that happens to me on a daily basis
00:38:11it's lovely it's kind of i remember being in a an irish pub in um just off wabash avenue in
00:38:19chicago
00:38:21and i walk in behind the bar and he goes oh Niall the fellow behind the bar i was like
00:38:25i said how's it going how you doing he goes i was in i was in i did my junior
00:38:29serve with your cousin
00:38:30robert that's all he said to me and then he just threw pints over the counter for the evening
00:38:36and i have that story 30 times over around the world yeah yeah i love that uh
00:38:44i'm the little irish fella in the music industry that i can i love waving the flag
00:38:51uh thanks for what sorry what gigs have you coming up here uh oh uh well i have an app
00:38:58my album is
00:38:59uh coming out um in june and then i'll be playing the tree arena in november for a couple of
00:39:06nights um
00:39:07and uh yeah i'm i'm very excited like as i said i get to travel the world play to different
00:39:12types of
00:39:13people but they're genuinely isn't a better crowd in the world than a home gig
00:39:17mashing thank you tommy thanks cheers
00:39:36welcome back to the third half everybody who's next freddie well tommy our next guest is felly speaks
00:39:51hello very pleased to meet you nice to meet you we've met before are you are you a poet i
00:39:59am a poet
00:40:00where did i meet you right here fairly speaks you weren't on your own last time i met you no
00:40:08i wasn't
00:40:08you were with the other mad one from mullingar or longford longford i'm from long you're longford and
00:40:15she's um tullamore tullamore were you performing together back then or something no i i performed
00:40:22a poem that i have in the leaving site that's right and you were just delighted that your brother had
00:40:27to
00:40:27study it yeah exactly yeah i got him how have you been since and what have you been up to
00:40:35oh
00:40:36big question it's been a few years um i've been wintering if that makes sense
00:40:44in many ways disintegrating into somebody else disintegration yeah just
00:40:55yeah what's that like hard it's become joyful now but it was really hard
00:41:04becoming another version of yourself or the next version of yourself
00:41:11why do you use language like that why do you say
00:41:15why do you say disintegrating into somebody else i i understand i i get an image when you say that
00:41:22but what do you mean
00:41:26i think i began to like spoil and that that's a visceral image but that's exactly what it felt like
00:41:36i
00:41:36felt like i was spoiling um and then becoming compost and then now a new thing had to grow out
00:41:45of that
00:41:46but disintegrating or beginning a process of spoiling feels a lot like death
00:41:56so you're letting you're letting go of an identity or an image or your place in the world or how
00:42:03people
00:42:03see you're kind of going especially when you're so you're quite young when you're on the show so
00:42:10imagine you still might be young yeah i think i'm still a bit young yeah just turned 30 a few
00:42:15months ago
00:42:18what led you to the desire to allow the disintegrating to happen
00:42:26i really enjoy growth
00:42:30painful or not i enjoy the idea of becoming and being more
00:42:38more and being more doesn't have to be bigger just new i enjoy development because i think there's
00:42:46always something there's always something there so on a practical level yeah what happened on a
00:42:53practical level sure housing crisis was one um i was living in dublin and then suddenly i couldn't
00:43:02find a place and i had to find how to be without a home base or what looks like a
00:43:09home base
00:43:12and then choosing what flight looks like while you're homeless is also like
00:43:16i'm not homeless like i was on the street um i won't i won't pretend to claim that but
00:43:22just homeless in terms of like suddenly you went going from having
00:43:29everything everything nearly at my fingertips to just not so were you how were you earning money
00:43:34back then as an artist as a performing poet yeah and with do you have a sense that that
00:43:41stopped that dried up it didn't actually it didn't dry up i just
00:43:46that that couldn't materialize a house all of a sudden
00:43:51like while your house hunting doesn't currently in dublin anyway or in ireland doesn't matter how
00:43:57much money you have i i i don't agree with you because i i see these ads that the banks
00:44:01are doing
00:44:01and they're crying out for black performance poets from longford they're crying out for them
00:44:09all their ads say bring me your great idea and give you money for a house that'd be great
00:44:17i love that um so did you move somewhere yeah i lived in brussels for a couple of years
00:44:24and i went back and forth between brussels and dublin working in both spaces and
00:44:31yeah that was interesting because i got to be the same but more i got to figure out who i
00:44:40was when i
00:44:42wasn't constantly performing that was another thing because i think in my 20s i'd found so much
00:44:47of my identity and my value especially in being an artist in being in many ways some sort of a
00:44:57successful artist totally yeah and being applauded for that and then i had to learn the value of who i
00:45:04was outside of the thing that i thought gave me value so that was that was that was difficult
00:45:11do you do you have difficulty with feeling that's an interesting question
00:45:21difficulty is how in because you're quite a cerebral person i get you know everything is defined
00:45:27everything has a logical reason for it that you can verbalize interesting everything is uh and i would
00:45:33have the same tendency and i'm just wondering is there uh is the head a way of controlling the heart
00:45:44no i think i'm extremely balanced mind and heart i i find myself quite balanced actually i don't think i
00:45:56have difficulty with feeling i think i do take time to process feeling
00:46:02i used to have the habit of into intellectualizing feeling first yeah before feeling it but now i just
00:46:11excuse myself to take the time the day or the hours or the couple of weeks to feel
00:46:19what are you like in relationships oh interesting what kind of relationships uh i guess romantic ones huh
00:46:30intense
00:46:33and in houses
00:46:39anywhere you might be shopping centers
00:46:44a bit hazardous yeah but yeah i'm i think i'm loving
00:46:51because the only types of romantic relationships i allow require me to feel free as well as seen
00:46:59i'm in a new one actually
00:47:03a person in my generation would never use those words to describe a relationship
00:47:10why i don't know i i demand to be seen
00:47:16and heard
00:47:19i don't know it's just it's a different way of looking at them you know
00:47:27do you think that you uh had a strange childhood
00:47:34probably
00:47:38yeah
00:47:38yeah i think i grew up really quickly
00:47:43in many ways
00:47:48i think
00:47:50one like my primary school and secondary school for example was very multicultural
00:48:05the shock of being in an only white like majority white country until leaving longford actually
00:48:15longford was very
00:48:18melty potty
00:48:19mm-hmm for a long time for me
00:48:23and rough but the kind of rough that
00:48:26felt familiar
00:48:28i mean i moved i was moved to longford when i was like seven or eight so
00:48:34it's all i've really known through my childhood but
00:48:38the grit
00:48:41is familiar
00:48:45i had two younger brothers i'm the only girl child in my family
00:48:51so i also grew up quite
00:48:53in general rough around the edges
00:48:56but i also had a lot of joy
00:48:59as a child there's so much community i was in constant community for me like
00:49:07my favorite teacher miss fitz morris lived a seven minute walk from me she took me to my first
00:49:14poetry competition i remember the day i walked down there like i was like
00:49:1911 it was raining she dried me off in the sunroom drove me to carrick on shannon
00:49:25i got a little plaque it was great and then she drove me back home because my mom was working
00:49:32in duns like the ordinariness was very communal it's also why like i'm i feel very culture through
00:49:43and through culture very bloody culture like in every country i go to i'd rather the countryside
00:49:52yeah i like the weird smell of turf
00:49:58my brother can drive a tractor for god's sake it's just
00:50:04it's just home
00:50:07and i hadn't lived back home in 13 years i left when i was 17
00:50:17and i've moved back home to longford
00:50:20did you move back into the family home
00:50:21into your old room
00:50:26yeah what are the challenges of being at home now age 30 after an independent artistic
00:50:35international life it's been only a couple of days so it hasn't gotten bad
00:50:42but one it's already been a couple of days and you've already come to dublin to do a chat show
00:50:47escape bruce um but they're doting on me which is really sweet
00:50:57because i feel like i've been an adult for so long even though like i'm only 30 like but
00:51:05i feel like i get to be their child again
00:51:11which is nice
00:51:16that's a good positive to have about your mom and dad isn't it that you're you're
00:51:21is it moving you to say that hmm
00:51:27how come
00:51:45i was an like an assistant adult for a long time in the house thank you
00:51:55and i didn't mind it
00:52:01because i i find that
00:52:04i'm quite a capable person
00:52:11and capability often is not a respecter of your age especially when it's recognized in you
00:52:19and so you're pulled up by your capabilities
00:52:23and your vulnerabilities are not so much addressed or acknowledged
00:52:30i don't fault them for it we're an immigrant family in culture midlands island
00:52:43and as you find like i can be quite cerebral
00:52:48and so i i i can see what the problem is and i can manufacture the solution and address it
00:52:56and
00:52:57be emotionally intelligent enough to discuss and point out whose point of view to who and who
00:53:06and so
00:53:10apart from
00:53:13co-mothering my brothers
00:53:17i i parented my parents
00:53:25why did they need parenting
00:53:27difficulties in their union
00:53:32and just
00:53:36trying to care for each one as
00:53:39they needed
00:53:43because there's this privilege also
00:53:45that they've given me where
00:53:50there's this really
00:53:53silly quote from
00:53:55i think it's precious
00:53:58it's this movie called precious it's this really black saying
00:54:01it says um since you have your degree you know everything
00:54:05while tears are streaming down her face
00:54:07so since they they afforded me to have my degree and everything
00:54:13i felt the need to use my mind on their behalf
00:54:17because i'd been given the privilege of
00:54:23learning psychology and sociology which is where i studied
00:54:28and study in english and understanding social dynamics and
00:54:33having the space and the privilege to
00:54:37ponder
00:54:41and to theorize and therapize
00:54:45and even the privilege to
00:54:49know that you need therapy and then get the therapy
00:54:52and then find the words and the terms to describe what is happening
00:54:58whereas they have the
00:55:02discomfort
00:55:04of just only experiencing the feeling of it
00:55:08so i felt compelled to put order
00:55:11on the chaos
00:55:14with no regard for my
00:55:17age or developmental time or milestone at that time
00:55:25so by the time i realized even that like oh
00:55:28i better mind myself
00:55:31i'd already taken such a hit
00:55:34and so coming back home is
00:55:37and not flinching
00:55:39and not tensing
00:55:41and not marking it as a personal failure
00:55:45is new
00:55:51how aware are they of all that
00:56:02i don't think so much
00:56:04that they are
00:56:06well they know now
00:56:07yeah yeah
00:56:08yeah i think i told everybody our business tonight
00:56:14yeah
00:56:18they have a i'd say they have a sense of it
00:56:20because they know because they you know
00:56:22i think parents always know
00:56:23yeah
00:56:24something anyway
00:56:27how's the writing going now
00:56:29good i'm trying long form
00:56:33so like prose pieces
00:56:34yeah
00:56:35i think i'm trying to write a book at the moment
00:56:39told the world now
00:56:41but i'm really excited about it
00:56:44because i've gone from spoken word poems
00:56:47poetry in general being my first
00:56:48kind of release
00:56:50or my first pen
00:56:53into writing plays
00:56:55the past couple of years i've been writing a lot of plays
00:56:58and now
00:57:00i'm writing a book
00:57:01and i didn't think i was the type of person that would ever write a book
00:57:04it just sounds like so much commitment
00:57:06but it just
00:57:09it just dropped
00:57:10i was like oh got the idea
00:57:11that's what it is
00:57:13what does the next short while hold for you do you think
00:57:16hmm
00:57:17i love probably
00:57:21healing roots with family
00:57:23building the life of my partner
00:57:26writing this book
00:57:28where's the partner
00:57:31he's in limerick
00:57:33he's in limerick
00:57:36is he not allowed to go home to longford with you
00:57:39he actually did actually
00:57:41when i got back
00:57:43he came back with me to
00:57:44he drove you to longford
00:57:46and then drove away
00:57:46yeah absolutely did
00:57:49he drove me to longford
00:57:50then we spent a couple of days in dublin and then he's off again
00:57:55well good luck with that in terms of
00:57:58being in different locations
00:57:59yeah
00:57:59i think i'm used to
00:58:01being in different locations
00:58:04yeah i find
00:58:05i've started to find joy in it
00:58:07the traveling
00:58:10hmm
00:58:11it's been great to talk to you again philly and thank you very much for coming on to the show
00:58:16thank you for having me
00:58:19thank you
00:58:21thank you
00:58:23and now ladies and gentlemen
00:58:25would you please welcome the scratch
00:58:26performing pulling teeth from their new album pull like a dog
00:58:53oh
00:58:55oh
00:59:08I was dressed and had a gathering on top of hell
00:59:10Like a brisket shepherd's morning
00:59:15Air so cold, you could crack it on a knee
00:59:18I'd train the eye like an eagle
00:59:19I'd wash the creatures me up on
00:59:22Sometimes you get lucky
00:59:25Sometimes I'll disappear back at the home
00:59:27I said, it's not too fucking
00:59:31Cause you're a fucking fool
00:59:36Don't fall down busy
00:59:38Just a good and shoot yourself busy
00:59:40He's an Irish man, yo
00:59:49Don't fall down busy
00:59:51Just a good and shoot yourself busy
00:59:53He's an Irish man, yo
00:59:57So stick your heart so big, you better, yo
01:00:02So bring your child up on a bed
01:00:04But you tend to bend down
01:00:05And shake your head to pictures
01:00:07You sing aloud that banner of a hand of a mother
01:00:11And string it to the bow of your soul
01:00:14From another brother
01:00:16Sometimes you get lucky
01:00:19Sometimes I'll disappear back at the home
01:00:21I said, it's not too fucking
01:00:24Cause you're lucky
01:00:30So strong and busy
01:00:32Just a good and shoot yourself busy
01:00:34He's an Irish man, yo
01:00:37I said, God bless him
01:00:44So strong and busy
01:00:45Just a good and shoot yourself busy
01:00:48He's an Irish man, yo
01:00:50Oh, girl, big sauce, I'm in blaze
01:00:51I'm a rusty old face, I'm a fireplace
01:00:53Jeff Black on a rack, cover the panic attack
01:00:56Now, please, for the righteous
01:00:58But not a single word or a rack that tells me
01:01:01You've stamped the courageous at all
01:01:03Just come apart, but you have to play the part
01:01:05So rise up, I say
01:01:07If you can't, you're not squatted
01:01:09And I say, bollocks
01:01:10Ask yourself what you truly want
01:01:12You'll be sad first, but sadly
01:01:14What are you so afraid of?
01:01:16What are you so afraid of?
01:01:44Those walls, walls and busy
01:01:46Just a good and shoot yourself busy
01:01:49He's an Irish man, yo
01:01:52So stick your hands off at the different area
01:01:54Oh, boy, boy, boy
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