- 16 minutes ago
Category
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Short filmTranscript
00:07how does the Dorothy Parker saying go she actually didn't say that what is it I know you know it
00:13come on I like to have a martini two at the very most three I'm under the table and four
00:25I'm under
00:25the host Spanish nut mix
00:55your your house is incredible oh thank you right now I want to burn it all down become a minimalist
01:02no it's this is the best kind of clutter is that your book I uh can't wait to hear your
01:12thoughts
01:12well I can't wait to read it this is cute to ask for mine
01:22how are you feeling about classes starting tomorrow fine I think yeah do you know all the
01:28shortcuts the labyrinthine intricacies how intricate is it well do you have an idea yet no I tried to
01:36get my photo taken the other day but I couldn't find the office do you want me to take you
01:40there
01:40tomorrow I could give you the underground tour that would that would be amazing oh shit
01:56hello hello
01:59oh how's it going man oh John uh we didn't expect you uh this is Vlad Vlad this is John
02:05you can
02:06check my hand but I don't think cancellation can be spread through skin-to-skin contact oh no I don't
02:10I don't care I'm just messing with no it's none of my business uh honestly I'm I'm actually star
02:17shark I'm a huge fan of your criticism come on don't bullshit me no your book on Ashbury's first
02:21collection that book is so fucking good man well thanks I appreciate that what are you doing home
02:28John ah may I uh steal this one for a second yeah I should I should get going oh no
02:33don't go we
02:34haven't unpacked yet I I should be home for bedtime oh you sweet modern fathers I don't think John helped
02:39with bedtime ever how was your little one uh she's three she's uh a beast I love three you can
02:46still
02:47control them with your body yeah well yeah it's better than two two almost killed Cynthia literally
02:55uh well I'll I can I'll walk you out sure yeah good okay yeah you too
03:21that hair is growing from your chin again
03:22heads up fuck wasn't there yesterday we need to talk nope listen uh no you're not even supposed
03:30to be here stop acting like a teenage girl don't denigrate teenage girls I've had some time to
03:37reflect I don't care stop I'm cleaning just sit down I'm hungry I drank that martini on an empty
03:45stomach I'll make you a sandwich sit down
03:56I'm sorry what are you sorry about I'm sorry that I made you upset
04:06sorry that I was rude and dismissive and dismissive and patriarchal oh he doesn't like that sorry that
04:14I was taking you for granted but I've been thinking about it okay and I realized all we need to
04:20do is
04:21delay the hearing until the end of the year that's it and then I'll retire before the hearing can happen
04:26and I'll get my full pension and it'll be done so do you think we can figure out how to
04:31make that
04:31happen you figure it out I need your help
04:36Florence even saw me on campus I think the stick up her ass would come out of her mouth
04:43you know Lila joined the case as a complainant when last week
04:52so I just I think it's in your best interest to help me push it back you could reach out
04:58to David
05:06we talked to Sid this afternoon why isn't she answering my calls she's just acting out
05:19and then I was also thinking Spanish for because grad programs require written proficiency smart and then
05:28um weightlifting for my anxiety also smart um for my English requirement I was thinking creative nonfiction
05:36with Cynthia Tong
05:40I thought you were taking women in American fiction with me
05:43right but oh but of course I do you you want to write essays
05:47no yeah I've been trying yeah it's very smart because um my class is so full in the fall
05:54students worming their way in off the wait list better to take it in spring when the students are abroad
06:00that's what I was thinking absolutely take her class love to give new teachers a boost
06:08come in
06:11am I interrupting oh I have to go anyway no no wait wait uh flat this is Edwina my best
06:18and favorite
06:19student Edwina this is Professor Vlidinsky what please hi hi I'm okay bye bye bye hi hi um so you
06:29came for
06:29the tour um after you okay hey you you did not give me your book last night
06:38well I thought you'd never ask oh look at you coffee all ready to go well
06:49yes it's a nice photo
06:50mm-hmm I hate it hi a bit of a thirst trap don't you think it's okay desire is okay
07:00what are you working on now honestly I've had
07:03crippling writer's block for the past 15 years give me a break that's not a real thing no it is
07:08for
07:08me I've tried everything artist way microdosing ketamine no seriously I have nothing works okay well
07:16then how are we gonna get to going again who cares nobody thank you no that's why you should
07:23write because nobody cares whether you do or not because that makes it free or something
07:29mix of yours something secret dirty only for you
07:40I try to stay away from secret and dirty things these days
07:46how's that working for you
07:59trust me after the first week it'll be standing room only
08:09hey
08:10hey you started without me just warming up
08:22so are you coming to the faculty happy hour I try to I don't think so
08:29do you know the date for the hearing yet
08:33it's in the works do you know if it's this semester or next semester it's gonna be soon
08:40I'm just wondering because if we could delay until the end of the year
08:45John could retire and he'd be gone and the department could avoid a whole mess
08:51is this about Lila do you think you can help me no way there's zero percent chance I'm gonna intercede
09:00okay
09:03fine
09:07do you know what's interesting
09:11I've had the same email address at this college since 1996.
09:15me too what's interesting about that oh it's just interesting the the non-professional ways we used email back then
09:24and I was naive I was tenure track at the time but you were on my review for it weren't
09:29you
09:30you were weren't you when we were writing all these lovely sexy emails to each other and
09:37doing the other things obviously things that just to confirm your wife is still unaware of yes
09:51you're better than this well I thought I was but apparently I'm not sorry
10:07all right and I'll see what I can do
10:12thank you no you should know this was a disappointing conversation
10:24I think I'd let that pompous pencil of his twat little school mom fuck me
10:50she must be busy
10:59oh hi hello there sorry I'm uh running to get fee they charge extra if you're late oh yeah I
11:05remember
11:05that whole racket are you uh you coming to drink thing on friday probably not oh boo please come
11:27I remember when men used to put their hands behind their head in the playground with me when
11:32this kid was little they're just like peacocks when they're attracted to a woman they actually make
11:39themselves bigger hi david i got you a meeting with lynn no you know it's the only way i don't
11:49know that
11:50president president's wife so back door well it's the most effective way when are we going she only
11:56wants to meet with you but i can't talk i'm at an event
12:26i can't talk i'm at an event
12:52i used to be able to orgasm in a second
12:55i can't talk i'm at an event
12:56i can't talk i'm at an event
13:25i can't talk i'm at an event
14:03it's after eight oh thank you oh shit did you um speak to david i had a meeting with lynn
14:13today
14:21i'm good unfortunately yes one hit wonder i don't think so but i didn't think i was back
14:31then either good looking it's almost as hot as i was
14:42you smoking no
14:51this is the college president's house it's like the white house the college gives it to him
14:57of course the president is always someone who would ever need free housing in the first place
15:02but i don't see why i should i find the whole thing very disturbing insulting to women our age
15:10humiliating for you don't you think uh yes well lynn your face looks just fabulous what are you doing
15:20hearing like this would be such bad timing for the college is it ever bad timing for truth
15:26well these were consensual affairs i fucked a professor once he didn't call me after that
15:32night and i was devastated oh i am sorry statistics you were a statistic he taught statistics oh i'm not
15:40unhappy to have had the experience though because he was uncircumcised it was a different time wasn't
15:47it you remember what it was like for us it was a casting call it's good it's not like that
15:55anymore
15:56of course
15:57lynn remember the last thing with a student happened more than 10 years ago john knows times have changed
16:05he would never do anything like that now you are just so contoured
16:11oh well i bought a device on sale i'll send you a link
16:21are you sure you can't control him
16:28absolutely
16:48might as well get it over with
16:53thank you
17:04hey
17:07wait wait
17:10hey sorry i just wanted when you came in the other day i didn't get in the camp
17:15you're pulling away from me
17:18bitch
17:27oh
17:31oh
17:48hey you guess what what we did it fucking win delayed until summer just like that
17:56i mean can you believe it you're fucking with me i'm not
18:02that's incredible i mean oh my god i can't believe it's over just like that that's outstanding
18:07that is outstanding oh look at you i'm very proud of you well i am desperately ashamed of myself but
18:15the end justifies the means maybe okay okay we're gonna celebrate these popular champers what are
18:22you doing i'm gonna well i had some plans but uh it means he had a date i will cancel
18:27no don't
18:28cancel don't cancel we can celebrate tomorrow sure i'm fully sure i also have some plans
18:38say thanks to your old boyfriend i'd take a look at your eyebrows if i were you
18:45appreciate that
18:59hi honey oh hello look lovely is this cashmere it's polyblast oh may i have a white wine please
19:09coming right up
19:26hi hi hi oh sorry sorry i touched you i just wanted to be sure you were here in the
19:33in the flesh
19:35as opposed to what oh in my dreams uh no no um i i just have been reading your book
19:43for the last
19:44couple of days so you've been very present in my mind oh it's wonderful but i i hope you know
19:51that
19:51well i i never mind being told by someone whose opinion i value so maybe we can have lunch sometime
19:58and discuss it if you enjoy lunch you love lunch lunch is one of my top three favorite meals uh
20:05but i can't i can't have lunch with you oh no i sorry i mean i can't have lunch until
20:11i've read
20:11your book oh it should be a you know reciprocal exchange uh of course there is a value in um
20:19in
20:23reciprocity where where's cynthia she eats a fee for dinner um bars are triggering for her so she'll pick me
20:31up
20:31you only have the one car who needs more than one car oh well that's what i thought when we
20:36first moved
20:36here and then what happened um uh should we should sit down sure yeah yeah no i don't think so
20:50i just think
20:50people are into it for the pot iris sex side kids i'm heading home to see the spawn before they
20:56go to sleep
20:58how is it wonderful she's arguing a case in front of the supreme court wow i thought it was a
21:06circuit court no it's the supreme one a circuit court is still impressive hey oh oh hi
21:18i just met your student she is exceptional oh you'll adore each other and and who is this
21:26we do not get i have been texting you for a half hour
21:36sorry okay i'm not drunk i'm not drunk more drunk than i am can we go uh yes i'm uh
21:43you know i'm just
21:44gonna go to the bathroom how's the book coming it's it's a memoir right oh uh man yeah i don't
21:55know
21:55right now right now it's kind of heavy i'm writing about this time when she was two and it was
22:02just uh
22:04hard oh great vlad was telling me
22:08he was don't worry a three is much better okay ready i'm gonna wait in the car
22:16okay okay well i look forward to reading you
22:30thank you
22:35what
22:56i'll see you soon yeah
23:12one benefit of the arrangement between john and myself is when he has a date he's gone for the night
23:18if he comes back can you read me another cause now i just got a piece
23:21okay there i am and i get a glorious undisturbed evening to myself
23:34john
23:38lynn
23:39steve
23:40john good to see you
23:41good to see you
23:42good to see you
23:58good news
24:00very good news and i i seriously can't thank you enough
24:02hi
24:05hi
24:06but
24:10we're gonna go join my husband
24:14fuck
24:15is everything okay
24:19no
24:21no
24:28no
24:29no
24:29no
24:30no
24:30no
24:34no
24:35no
24:36no
24:36no
24:43Oh, my God.
25:08Oh, my God.
26:03Oh, my God.
26:06Oh, my God.
26:45Oh, my God.
27:06Oh, my God.
27:40Oh, my God.
28:10Oh, my God.
28:36Oh, my God.
29:02Oh, my God.
29:02Oh, my God.
29:02Oh, my God.
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