- 2 days ago
S1Ep1
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:02Hey, everybody, and thanks so much for coming to this very impromptu meeting that I just called.
00:06Hey, you, how are you? Good to see you again.
00:08This is my first day.
00:10Ah, yes, you're Jeannie's replacement, thank God.
00:13Uh, I'm Jeannie.
00:16Hey, you nut.
00:18Listen, I'm sorry, it's hard to keep up with the turnover here, really.
00:20I mean, can you blame me? This is my fourth dot-com in two years.
00:24Anyway, I'm heading out for the weekend off to my hometown to receive what they call the Spread Your Wings
00:29Award.
00:30How embarrassing for being the most successful, well-adjusted person to come from there, blah, blah, blah.
00:36Anyway, I promise when I get back, I will have everybody's name memorized.
00:40Especially you, person between Quan and Jeannie.
00:45I'm Jeannie.
00:46Okay, people, let's pick a name and stick with it.
00:58On track, this is Marcy. Can I help you?
01:00Hi. Oh, hi. I was just calling. I need to double-check some directions.
01:04I'm heading to Clark, my hometown.
01:07Getting the Spread Your Wings Award.
01:09It's like their highest honor, I don't even know.
01:11But anyway, I'm presently on the 10 freeway.
01:14Well, basically, you just stay on that for another, oh, 18 hours.
01:18Wow, 18 hours.
01:19Well, at least my bra will make it.
01:22Ha!
01:23Well, glad to help, and thanks for calling on.
01:25Actually, I'm looking forward to going home to see my mom.
01:28Oh, I've been so caught up with work lately.
01:30I haven't been home for a few years, and I really miss her.
01:33But hey, I'm not going to bore you with that mushy mother-daughter stuff.
01:37And this is from a woman who, when I was five and made her an ashtray out of clay,
01:41loved me so much that she took up smoking just so she could use it.
01:46I mean, I guess what I'm trying to say is I just miss someone who's there for me always, you
01:50know?
01:52Really there.
01:55Marcy?
01:56Still here.
01:58And then there's my sister.
02:00Oh!
02:02Man, no man.
02:11Man, no man, no man.
02:42All right.
02:43Anybody home?
02:44Ellen!
02:45Mom?
02:45Hi!
02:46Oh my gosh!
02:48Oh!
02:49Oh my gosh!
02:51I'm not even counting the seconds though!
02:53I'm not even counting the seconds of the car!
02:55I just pinch myself!
02:56Oh, and then you pinch me instead.
02:58All right, well.
02:59Wow, something smells wonderful.
03:03Well, we got a new carpet.
03:07No, more of a meaty smell.
03:14Oh, my London broil.
03:16Oh, you guys visit.
03:19I'll be right back.
03:21Oh, the gang's all here.
03:25I'm so happy you're home.
03:27I'm so happy.
03:27Wow, to be home, Kathy, you look great.
03:30Well, I have a new boyfriend.
03:31Oh, again, okay, good.
03:34His name is Donald, and Ellen, he's wonderful.
03:37Nothing like the last guy.
03:38Oh, Cesar, what happened to him?
03:41He was deported back to Ecuador.
03:45And he stole around $3,000 from Mom.
03:47Oh, Lord, oh, well, well, could have been more.
03:52It was, it was $4,000.
03:56And then, of course, before him, I was seeing Rudy.
03:59Yeah, she told me about Rudy.
04:00She called him the one that got away.
04:02Oh, no, they found him.
04:06He's back in prison now.
04:09Kathy, uh...
04:10Anyway, I could really get serious with this guy Donald.
04:13He's a lot like you.
04:14He has his own business.
04:16Oh.
04:16Well, you really think he's got his feet on the ground?
04:19He's all that and a bag of chips.
04:20Ah.
04:22Well, you know how I love chips.
04:25Besides, it turns out I'm not such an expert on relationships after all.
04:29What happened?
04:30We broke up.
04:31Who broke up?
04:33Ellen.
04:34Oh.
04:35Oh, I'm so sorry.
04:37Yeah.
04:37Oh, I liked her so.
04:41She had such nice teeth.
04:42Yeah.
04:45Yep, well, she took those with her.
04:47Oh.
05:02Your old room.
05:04Yeah, didn't have a clue, huh, Mom?
05:10Hey, thanks.
05:11Listen, I've been giving this a lot of thought.
05:13What would you say about moving back to California with me?
05:15Oh, gosh, California.
05:17Yeah.
05:18Leave Catherine here all by herself?
05:20Oh, well, you know, Catherine's not going to live here forever, for all we know.
05:23What did she tell you?
05:25Is she seeing someone?
05:26Ellen, don't give her money.
05:29Come on, really, Mom.
05:30Don't you get lonely?
05:31Who can you get lonely in Clark?
05:34Birds wake you up in the morning.
05:36Their neighbors are your friends.
05:38Your friends are like family.
05:40You don't have to lock your doors at night.
05:42Yeah, sure, now that Rudy's back in the slammer.
05:44Oh, my God.
05:46Oh, guess who I ran into at the bank today?
05:49Oh, okay.
05:50New topic.
05:51Who?
05:52Ed Munn.
05:53My old economics teacher.
05:54Yeah.
05:54Oh.
05:55He's the one who organized the entire carnival.
05:57Oh, you didn't tell me there was going to be a carnival.
06:00Well, that's where they're giving you the Spread Your Wings Award, honey.
06:03It's all part of Ellen Day.
06:05Oh.
06:07Oh.
06:09I should probably make an appearance.
06:13Also, he wants you to come by and lecture his economics class.
06:17I know your old prom date's eager to see you, too.
06:20He's a teacher there now.
06:22Rusty Carnook is a teacher?
06:23Yeah.
06:24Just look at you two on prom night.
06:26You were never more radiant.
06:34What, was I back around 9.30 that night?
06:36You're right in time for the bionic woman.
06:48Mr. Munn?
06:50Ellen?
06:52As I live and breathe, is it really you?
06:55Oh, like I'd send a clone.
06:58Big hug.
07:00Oh, there she is.
07:02Rusty, hey.
07:11You look wonderful.
07:14So do you.
07:14I miss a perm, but still.
07:16Nice.
07:18So are you married?
07:19Don't tell me somebody got there before me.
07:22No, no, I'm single.
07:24So there's still a chance.
07:26Uh, not, no, not really.
07:29I'm gay.
07:31Really?
07:34Hey, gay are you?
07:37Congratulations.
07:39Thanks.
07:39You actually may be the first person to congratulate me for that.
07:43Oh, well, congratulations.
07:44Oh, that's okay.
07:45Congratulations.
07:46That's a congratulations.
07:49Yeah, no need to harp on it.
07:51Say, you know who else is gay is Bunny Hofstetter, the P.E. teacher.
07:55Yeah, P.E. teacher.
07:56Huh, that's different.
07:59Yeah, you know, I have a great idea.
08:01Okay.
08:04Attention, Miss Hofstetter.
08:06Please report to the teacher's lounge.
08:07That's not necessary.
08:08That's not necessary.
08:09It's no trouble.
08:10Sure.
08:10Ellen, please.
08:11Bunny Hofstetter, on the run to Mr. Munn.
08:14Hop to it, Bunny.
08:17She hates that.
08:18Yeah, I can imagine.
08:19Oh, I'm sorry.
08:20Now, Ellen, this is Meg Saxon.
08:22She's our homemaking teacher.
08:24Oh, wow.
08:24Homemaking.
08:25I thought they kind of stopped teaching that in high school.
08:27No, they kind of didn't.
08:30It's still a very popular course.
08:32Yeah.
08:33Hey, got milk?
08:37No.
08:42Oh, she's from Canada.
08:43Yeah.
08:43Mm-hmm.
08:45You rang, people.
08:46Oh, Bunny.
08:49Bunny, this is Ellen.
08:51Nice to meet you.
08:52Hi, how are you?
08:53Nice to meet you.
08:53Yeah, okay.
08:55Well, I guess I'll check on the kids.
09:01You're welcome.
09:07This is funny.
09:08I was in a teacher's lounge, and I told them I was gay.
09:11And then they called you, and they thought we should meet somehow.
09:13I mean, how small-minded can you get?
09:16Oh, boy.
09:17So, free for dinner.
09:25Oh, gee, that's sweet and quick.
09:27But, um, I just, uh, got out of a relationship.
09:31Oh, hey, oh, loud and clear.
09:33Okay.
09:35Okay, well, I'll, uh, good meeting you, and I'll see you later.
09:38So, uh, how are we leaving it?
09:39You'll call me?
09:43Okay, class.
09:44Um, today we are going to put that away.
09:48We have a very, very special guest today.
09:51This young lady was an econ student of mine.
09:55Please welcome Ellen Richmond.
09:57Oh, thank you so much.
09:58Well, I'll be right back to you.
09:59Okay, thank you.
10:00Thanks so much.
10:01Wow.
10:02Well, uh, listen, I know you kids are itching to get out there and celebrate Ellen Day, so
10:08I'm not going to really talk to you.
10:10I'm more like a kick-it with you, you know?
10:13Um, you know, kind of old school, you know?
10:18You know?
10:19Well, because actually, this is my old school.
10:21So, uh, I'm basically, I'm just like you.
10:24I mean, sure, I'm richer, I'm wealthier, and I have more money.
10:28Oh, probably me.
10:30Hello?
10:32Hello?
10:33I can hardly...
10:34Oh, Kwan!
10:35Yes!
10:36Oh, that's better.
10:37Creed.
10:37They rock.
10:38Arms wide open.
10:40Arms wide open.
10:41It helps reception.
10:42Thanks.
10:45Yeah, hi.
10:46Oh, yes, I can...
10:47What kind of problem?
10:48Hold on.
10:49What?
10:50Just a second.
10:52Oh, there you go.
10:54Perfect.
10:54Okay.
10:55Oh, that's funny.
10:56It sounded like you said we're out of business.
10:59Okay, now it sounded like you said we are out of business, like you're emphasizing the
11:03word are.
11:05No, I think you're in denial.
11:08I see.
11:10I see.
11:12Okay.
11:18Kids?
11:20I'm exactly like you.
11:30Yeah, okay, great.
11:32Well, just let me know if you hear anything.
11:34Thanks.
11:35Ellen, there you are.
11:37Well, someone's an old gloomy Gus.
11:41Oh, yeah, I just got some bad news.
11:44Yeah?
11:45My business collapsed.
11:48Oh.
11:49Well, thank you, lucky stars.
11:50You weren't there at the time.
11:54No, the building is okay.
11:56There's just no business to go inside of it anymore.
11:58I lost my funding.
12:01What do you need?
12:02$16 million.
12:04I don't have that.
12:06But on Wednesday, there's a lottery drawing for $8.2 million.
12:10That would get us to half.
12:12Yeah, that would get us close.
12:13Of course, we would also have to win.
12:16Hey.
12:17Let's get your caricature done.
12:19Come on.
12:20I don't know why.
12:21I didn't think of that.
12:22Just follow along here.
12:23Okay.
12:24Hi.
12:24Hi.
12:24And what do you do for a living?
12:26Hobbies.
12:26Ask about hobbies.
12:28Hello?
12:29It's static.
12:30Can you hear?
12:30Hello?
12:33Where does somebody have to go around here to get good reception?
12:41Could you stop it at the top, please?
12:43Hey, Alan!
12:44Oh.
12:45You don't know how happy that makes me to hear that.
12:48First thing Monday.
12:49Yes.
12:50Oh.
12:51And I have a good feeling about this one.
12:53I really do.
12:53Whatever they do, I'm sure the world needs it.
12:56Okay.
12:58Goodbye.
12:59Good news?
13:00Oh, great news.
13:01I think I got myself a job.
13:03That means I'm going to have to leave tonight to get back in time.
13:05But what a relief.
13:07Things were a little shaky for a while.
13:09Speaking of shaky.
13:11Remember when we used to do this?
13:12Yeah.
13:13You ever get in trouble?
13:14Hey, cut that out!
13:17So, uh, what do you do in L.A. for fun?
13:20Oh, God.
13:21Everything.
13:22Man.
13:24I see a lot of celebrities at that.
13:26I saw Ed Asner once.
13:28Is he as gruff in person as his persona?
13:33You know, he was in another car, so it may not have even been him.
13:39I bet it was.
13:40Yeah, maybe.
13:42You know what?
13:42This is my last day in Clark.
13:44Let's not talk about L.A.
13:45Stress.
13:47I hear you.
13:49I actually took some time off from teaching for a while there.
13:52Moved to Patterson.
13:54Managed the Home Depot.
13:55But when they said they were going to 24 hours, I said, buddy, there aren't enough hours in
14:01the day.
14:03It wasn't a great comeback, I know.
14:06But the point is, life's too short.
14:10Enough of that ego trip.
14:11I ripped off that orange vest.
14:13I tailed it right back to Clark.
14:17Oh, you've got a good thing going on here.
14:19You don't want to F this up.
14:21Ellen, you can say fudge.
14:26All right.
14:27What?
14:28You're going.
14:29You're going too far.
14:31Sounds like prom night.
14:35You're going to go crazy on me.
14:36Three-legged race.
14:37Three-legged race.
14:38Partner up, sisters.
14:39Three-legged race.
14:40Oh, wow.
14:41The three-legged race.
14:42I can't believe you all do that here still.
14:44What's next?
14:44A pie eating contest?
14:46I hope so.
14:47Just made 24 Dutch apple.
14:49Hey, I love Dutch apple.
14:50That is my favorite.
14:51I cannot say the right thing around that woman.
14:53Oh, my God, Ellen.
14:54There he is.
14:55There's Donald.
14:57Who's Donald?
14:58My guy.
14:59Right there by the cotton candy machine.
15:00Oh, wow.
15:01Catherine, you really downplayed his looks.
15:03He's gorgeous.
15:04I know.
15:05And he looks successful.
15:06I'd bring you over to meet him, but Mom's here,
15:08and I'm still trying to keep him out of her radar.
15:10And he's generous.
15:11He's a dream, Ellen.
15:12I'm so glad you like him.
15:14Donald has sold more cotton candy today than ever.
15:22He's beating the pants off the snow cone guy.
15:31Cutting candy?
15:32That's his business?
15:34He's a cotton candy guy?
15:36Do you know what one of those machines costs, Ellen?
15:38Uh-uh.
15:38Only a small fortune.
15:40Thank God for Mom, or he'd be renting one.
15:41Mom paid for his machine?
15:43She doesn't know, but yes, she contributed.
15:46This is not right.
15:47I knew you would do this.
15:48The glass is always half empty with you, Ellen.
15:51No, Catherine, there's no glass.
15:52You're drinking from the hose here.
15:55How do you do this to yourself?
15:57You deserve more than this.
15:58Well, it's not like I have you around all the time to talk to.
16:01And I know you're leaving right after the awards ceremony.
16:04Okay, but I could call you.
16:05I can call you from the car.
16:07The whole drive back, we can talk.
16:08I can call you next week.
16:09I want to spend more time with you, too.
16:11I really do.
16:11You do?
16:12Ellen!
16:13Ellen!
16:13Oh!
16:14There you are.
16:15Oh, okay?
16:16Yeah, that's the potato salad.
16:18Listen, I have got a tent full of people
16:21over there just chomping at the bit
16:22to glimpse the woman of the hour.
16:24No.
16:24And, by the way, we only got an hour
16:26because the termite people want their tent back.
16:28Oh, okay.
16:29Yes, okay.
16:30Sorry.
16:31I'll see you later.
16:31It's good.
16:32Okay, bye.
16:34Sorry.
16:35It's all right.
16:35It's okay.
16:36You want to come with?
16:36Sure.
16:40Ladies and gentlemen,
16:41welcome to the 2001 Clark Chamber of Commerce
16:45Spread Your Wings Award Ceremony
16:47honoring our own Ellen Richmond.
16:56Lights.
16:58You gotta be a special lady
17:00Come on, come on.
17:03Cause you got me sitting on top of the world
17:07Sitting on top of the world
17:09Here she is, sitting on top of a car.
17:14Senior Parade, 1978.
17:17Back then, we thought she was special.
17:20But who knew we were right?
17:23Then a whole bunch of stuff happened
17:25that we don't have photos for.
17:31Spread her wings.
17:33Boy, has she.
17:35Let's hear it for Ellen Richmond.
17:40You know, I don't really have anything prepared to say
17:43so I guess I'll just wing it.
17:45But, um, uh, I don't know.
17:49I feel like you don't have to spread your wings
17:52and fly away to make something of yourselves.
17:54You know, I mean, there are a lot of successful animals
17:57that don't have any wings at all.
18:00The dog from Turner and Hooch
18:01Think about him, you know.
18:04Working with Tom Hanks
18:05That's nothing to sniff at, you know.
18:08I bet the dog did sniff at Tom Hanks
18:10a couple of times, you know.
18:12And he had to get him away.
18:14But, um
18:16And then, uh, monkeys
18:17Monkeys don't have wings at all.
18:19Well, in The Wizard of Oz they did.
18:21They did.
18:22Yeah, they were scary, weren't they, you know.
18:24You can be successful and scary.
18:26I've met those people.
18:27And, um
18:29Anyway
18:30I look out and I
18:31I see all the familiar faces
18:33and all these
18:35friendly smiles
18:36all the people who need me
18:38Mom
18:39Catherine
18:41How you doing, Bunny?
18:51I would love to stay
18:52I really would
18:53but I've got to get back to my job
18:55with all of its challenges
18:56and opportunities
18:57and
18:59migraines
18:59and
18:59panic 2am phone calls
19:01and
19:01should probably get some Zantac for the road
19:07Anyway
19:08Thank you so much, Clark
19:09Thank you so much
19:38Thank you
19:40Debbie. Oh, uh, hi. It's Ellen from Arcy. Ma'am, we have over 300 employees here. Can I help you
19:48in any way? Yes. Uh, okay. Um, I'm, I'm on my way back home to L.A. Well, it doesn't
19:56look like you are. We show your car isn't moving. Are you stuck? Yes. Yes, that's a good way to
20:03put it. I'm stuck. I feel just unsettled. You know, I had a wild weekend, got the Spread Your Wings
20:09awarded.
20:10I don't know. Marcy has the whole backstory on it, really. Ma'am, do you have a question involving a
20:17right or a left? Oh, uh, yes. Uh, do you think it's right that I just left? Look, lady, you
20:26need directions getting home or not? Nope. I guess I don't.
20:47Hello. I'm home. Oh, it's Ellen. Oh, my God. Oh, I knew you'd come back. I'm so glad you decided
20:57to stay. I know. I know. Mom and I were just going out for dinner.
21:03What? Yeah, we've got to go. Oh, good. I'll tag along. Fantastic. Oh, no, you can't. No. Uh, we only
21:09have reservations for two and what with Ellen Day, you'll never get in.
21:19Where is that liquor cabinet?
21:24No, it's true.
21:44No, I don't know.
21:45No, I don't know.
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