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00:00Thank you for listening.
00:31Look at it.
00:32Bread's too big.
00:33What?
00:33What's that?
00:34British bread.
00:35British bread.
00:35Eat something.
00:37Work at the fork, eh?
00:38With the British bread that's been the same size as Adam was a lad,
00:41or this piece of foreign tat, you bud.
00:42Cut it up.
00:43Cut the bread off.
00:43Yeah, Leanne, eat something.
00:45You, stop that.
00:46Eat the object.
00:47It must have popped in, it pops up toasted.
00:48It's a labour-saving device.
00:49It's hardly open-heart surgery.
00:51Leanne, get this straight.
00:52You are not leaving this house without some food inside you.
00:54Give her some of that.
00:54I don't want any.
00:55Eat it.
00:56You made a mistake.
00:57Does it matter?
00:58Yes, because in all our marriage,
01:00you have never once admitted to making a mistake.
01:01And now I feel I have definitive proof.
01:03A toast that does not toast the bread that we eat.
01:06Have you or have you not made a mistake?
01:07Yes.
01:08And do you want to know why I made a mistake?
01:10No, I don't, but I'm pretty sure.
01:12In fact, I'm certain it'll be my fault.
01:13Yes, because when it comes to decisions like that, Eddie, you are nowhere to be seen.
01:18You'd sooner leave it all up to me.
01:19Will you stop that?
01:20And then, when something goes wrong, you can blame me for it.
01:22I'll leave it to you because you ignore everything I say anyway.
01:25That's because you've never made a sensible suggestion in your entire life.
01:29It's only winding you up.
01:33It was only, you know, I...
01:42There for Bo to see her.
01:44Hello.
01:44Bo to see her.
01:45She had a chariot like you.
01:47I used to read about her at school.
01:50I don't know whether they married her.
01:53All right, Paddy, see you later.
02:08Melbourne, do you know it?
02:10Yeah, yeah, get in.
02:12Eddie McAvoy.
02:15Yeah?
02:16We were at school together.
02:18It's Bob.
02:20Bob Hewitt.
02:22Hewitt!
02:22Yeah!
02:23I'm married!
02:29So, how long have you been on the cabs?
02:31Oh, years.
02:32Is it your own?
02:33Uh, yeah.
02:35And three others.
02:36Oh, doing all right then.
02:38Well, I don't really need to put on the road myself.
02:40I just like keeping the drivers on their toes, you know.
02:43Where to?
02:43In the Melville.
02:44Right, meter stays off.
02:46No, I mean...
02:47I'm minting, mate. Don't worry about it.
02:49Oh, if you say so.
02:54I don't know all about you, Eddie.
02:57You were crap at maths and science, but you were good at English and you liked the school
03:01trip, so you're going to be a travel writer one day, yeah?
03:04How would you know that?
03:05Pat told me.
03:07Pat?
03:07Pat?
03:07Yeah, Pat Tinsy.
03:10Pat Tinsy?
03:11We're married, Eddie.
03:13No.
03:14Yeah, yeah, we run the Melville together.
03:16Pat Tinsy.
03:24It's all right, mate.
03:26Oh, well.
03:26It's all right.
03:31Hey, listen.
03:32She would love to see you.
03:34I can't, mate.
03:35And you know, she's kept all that stuff you wrote.
03:37Uh, I'll be there in five.
03:39You're having me on.
03:40Swear to God.
03:42Tinsy and I?
03:43Yeah, we've got a charity do, so we'll keep it with leukaemia.
03:45Pop them down.
03:46I might just do that.
03:48Great.
03:48See you later.
03:49All right, cheers.
03:50Cheers.
03:50Yeah, all right.
03:56Is that where you bought these?
03:57Because you want me to come and see Pat bloody Dean, is he?
03:59No, I swear, no.
04:01I've got nothing to wear.
04:03Um, what about that dress you bought for Ricky and Rita's wedding?
04:06Can't wait that for a do in a pub.
04:08Of course you can.
04:09I want you to look good.
04:12For a change?
04:14You know, you're always...
04:18I mean...
04:18What?
04:19What do you mean?
04:20Well, sometimes you don't do yourself justice.
04:24I see.
04:26It's because Pat bloody Tinsy always does herself justice.
04:31Pig.
04:35Will you come?
04:37Yes.
04:37I'm not letting you go and see Pat bloody Tinsy on your own, am I?
04:40Of course I'm coming.
04:41Well?
04:42It's half six.
04:44I've got two hours.
04:45Exactly.
04:46Exactly.
04:48Exactly.
04:49Exactly.
04:50Exactly.
04:52Exactly.
04:54Exactly.
05:19Why won't you go?
05:20I don't want to.
05:21You were up for it an hour ago.
05:22I changed my mind.
05:23I'm sorry, Margie, but you're bang out of order.
05:25I go everywhere with you.
05:26You don't even ask.
05:27You just assume I'm going and I go.
05:28You don't do it for me.
05:29You do it for the Yale when you get there.
05:30I do it for you.
05:32Sorry.
05:34Right.
05:34Do you want me to go on me own?
05:38Do you want me to go on me own?
05:40Yes.
05:41Right.
05:41I'm going on me own.
05:43I'm going to get rat-arsed.
05:44Totally bloody rat-arsed.
05:46And I'll take up where I left off with her.
05:48Because she was mad about me.
05:49Bloody mad about me.
06:02Need some money.
06:04In my purse.
06:06Where?
06:07In my bag.
06:10In my bag.
06:34Did he find out that he was from?
06:36He did, yeah.
06:37From there, yeah?
06:41Look.
06:44You're going to have to start putting your light now.
06:45Oh, she's from God.
06:46She's still looking nice and nice.
06:48She's back to me.
06:49She's back to me for a week.
06:50She can't bloody come in, isn't she?
06:52Yeah.
06:53It would be great that she'd just...
06:54She's still having a blessing.
06:55Little Calumnius.
06:56She's doing a little right for me.
06:59I know.
07:00I know.
07:01Dark clouds, when we first set off,
07:04turned to driving rain by the time we reached Grasmere.
07:08And as we picked our way up to the tarn,
07:11hail stones the size of golf balls ricocheted all around us.
07:16Fortunately, we had the effervescent Pat Tinsley of Form 5A
07:21to keep our spirits up.
07:23Oh, Pat!
07:27Oh, my God.
07:31Wow.
07:33I don't believe it.
07:41Look at us all.
07:43Joan Jenkins, Jackie Rooney, Big Carlo.
07:48Oh, dear.
07:53Do you remember the old bandstand in the park?
07:57Think about it twice a day.
08:02Why didn't you...
08:06I suspected you too much.
08:08I wish you hadn't.
08:11Wanted to.
08:19Why didn't you tell me?
08:21Girls didn't, then.
08:23You had your fun, though.
08:25They're a bit bigger than they were, aren't they?
08:27Hey, everybody.
08:28Sit down, bingo.
08:29It's a nice and ten minutes.
08:32Four taxes.
08:33What?
08:34Bob says you got four taxes.
08:36Oh, yeah.
08:37Oh.
08:38I always thought there was nothing down for you, Eddie.
08:40Did you?
08:41Yeah.
08:42How wrong can you be?
08:49It's still a tits, man.
08:56Yeah, I did.
08:57I gave him you last week, and I said you were home for a day.
09:00I'm sick.
09:01I'm catching you.
09:01I know.
09:02I can't tell you, Bob.
09:03I can't tell you, Bob.
09:03I can't tell you.
09:03My battery.
09:04I want them.
09:05Go and tell him.
09:06Go and tell him, OK?
09:08I can't tell you.
09:11Why not?
09:11Why not?
09:12What will you tell him?
09:13Mum, will you tell him?
09:14He's been in my room again, and it's a battery's out of my MP3 playoff.
09:17And my batteries?
09:18No, he's always stupid.
09:19I'm always having to.
09:20End of the day, Mike.
09:21You're not going, my rude.
09:22Look, Vinny, you shouldn't have given me the batteries back.
09:24I said, I agree.
09:25There's a point.
09:25It's a whole point.
09:26My rude.
09:27He's lied to me.
09:28Oh, he's fixed up.
09:28So pretentious.
09:29What's wrong?
09:31Mum, what's wrong?
09:35That's a panic attack.
09:43Don't tell you, Dad.
09:49You know, I was working last night in a club.
09:50There was only 14 people in to see me.
09:53The manager said, don't worry, Billy, there's a coach coming soon.
09:55And when it came, they all got on it and went.
09:59Two fat ladies, number 88.
10:02I've got a fat wife.
10:03She was baptised at SeaWorld.
10:05She'd just been done for drugs.
10:07Oh, I, they found four pounds of cracking her knickers.
10:09Two and four, 24.
10:12You know, I've been married three times.
10:14My first wife died of eating boys and mushrooms,
10:16and my second wife died of a fractured skull.
10:19She wouldn't eat her mushrooms.
10:21You know, last time I got married,
10:22her parents promised me four acres of land and a cow.
10:26And I never got the land.
10:29On its own, number six.
10:32Right, we've just got two less to come up here, fellas,
10:34where they can all see you.
10:35And let's give them a round of applause.
10:37Here they come, Tweedledee and Tweedledum.
10:41He said to me in the bar earlier,
10:42I said to him, I said,
10:43if that belly were on a woman, she'd be pregnant.
10:45He said, it has been, and she is.
10:49Tell me, do you talk to your wife
10:51after you've made mad and passionate love?
10:54Uh, um, I do.
10:57If there's a phone, Andy.
10:58Well, here we go for a bottle of the finest Bulgarian brandy.
11:03Three and seven, 37.
11:06And it looks like we've got a winner in, German.
11:09Yes!
11:11Congratulations.
11:12There you are, sir.
11:14And now, ladies and gentlemen,
11:16to get this little lad off on a plane to Florida,
11:19we come to the star of our auction.
11:22Now, I've seen quite a few people weighing these balls up.
11:25My balls are massive.
11:26That's why I look so young.
11:27The weight of them pulls all the wrinkles out of me face.
11:30Now, this is one of a set of seven in the whole wide world.
11:35Uh-huh.
11:35Autographed by champions and fully authentic gaiting.
11:39So, we'll start me off at 300 pounds.
11:41300.
11:42300.
11:42Really?
11:43350, anybody?
11:45400.
11:45400 pounds from our stand-up bingo champ.
11:48Who'll give me 450?
11:49450.
11:50450 pounds from a bottle that's bigger.
11:52Who'll give me 500 pounds?
11:54500.
11:55Oh, now, here come the bigoties.
11:56You'll be bullied, Andy.
11:58550.
11:59Who is it?
12:00600.
12:01Sammy Nesbitt.
12:02Bids, plenty, buys, nothing.
12:03Oh, piss and wind.
12:04No, he's not.
12:06Sammy Nesbitt's a stand-up blow.
12:07700.
12:08If you go up to 5,000, I'll not miss it.
12:10800.
12:11900.
12:141,000 pounds, Lane Gatlin.
12:16We've got up to 2,000 at least.
12:17I know this guy's all about bragging rights.
12:191,100.
12:20Fantastic.
12:201,200.
12:211,300.
12:22Look at Big Bob.
12:22You know they won't let anyone else have it now.
12:241,300.
12:251,300.
12:251,400.
12:271,400 pounds.
12:28Anybody?
12:281,400.
12:291,400 pounds from our bingo champ.
12:32Any advance on 1,400?
12:34Come on, let's make it 1,500.
12:36Anybody?
12:37Let's make it a nice 1,500.
12:39Anybody?
12:401,400.
12:421,400.
12:421,400 going once.
12:431,400 going twice.
12:46Sold to the bingo champion of 1,400.
12:50Yay!
12:51Thank you very much, everybody.
12:59How do you want to pay, mate?
13:02My son with leukemia.
13:03You have made him so, so happy.
13:06He wants to thank you.
13:09No, no.
13:10That's all right, mate.
13:11Yeah.
13:12No, look, I can't really hear you.
13:14No, it's all right.
13:16No, it's my pleasure.
13:18All right.
13:19All right, love.
13:19It's just overwhelming.
13:21Is it going to be cash, mate?
13:27Can I pay over the credit card?
13:37If I'm passing, I'll, uh...
13:41If you come round here and Bob's away, you know what'll happen, don't you?
13:48Yeah.
13:51Could you do that, Tamarji?
13:54Oh, my God.
13:57You couldn't.
13:59And even if you could, you'd never get away with it.
14:02Because you're a terrible liar.
14:07And that's one of the things I loved about you.
14:37Are you getting in?
14:40Eddie, are you getting in?
14:52First love, eh?
14:55Missing the last bus, walking three miles home and not giving a damn.
14:59Because we had that extra half hour with the phone calls at end.
15:04Oh, no, you put it down.
15:05No, you put the phone down.
15:06No, you put it down.
15:08Yeah.
15:09I loved the bits, Ken.
15:12I love Margie, too, but, you know, not, not, like, so intense, you know.
15:19Put that down to being older and wiser.
15:22Wiser, yeah.
15:29You're Margie waiting up for you, is she?
15:32Do you think you'll never love like that again, Ken?
15:35When, like, you know, when you fall in love, like, as a teenager.
15:39Do you ever love like that again?
15:42I mean, maybe next time it's deeper, yeah.
15:47You know, more mature, like.
15:49Yeah, less intense, but deeper.
15:51I mean, that's just bullshit, you know.
15:53You know, you just never equals that first time, time again.
15:59What?
15:59You say something.
16:01It's Margie waiting up.
16:03Oh, dear.
16:06I never, never missed the last bus once when I was caught in Margie, hadn't I?
16:13Never missed the last bus.
16:14You had a taxi.
16:16Yeah, here.
16:17Look.
16:19Here.
16:21Have a look at this.
16:23How much are these?
16:25How much are these worth, eh?
16:27I don't know.
16:28Come on, have a guess.
16:3020, 30 quid.
16:31Oh, look.
16:33They're signed by all the greats.
16:35There's one of only seven sets in the entire world.
16:38I'd say a museum is a bit for these.
16:41How much?
16:43150.
16:45Come on.
16:47I don't know.
16:48I don't know if you had two.
16:51Five grand's worth or something like that, yeah?
16:54Or at least...
16:55Get you home.
16:57Get you to bed, son.
17:03Here you go.
17:06Why must I be a teenager in love?
17:11That's 12 quid to you.
17:12Yeah.
17:13Look at that.
17:14Have a drink, mate.
17:16Have a drink on me.
17:17You sure?
17:18I've had a great night, yeah.
17:23Mind how you're going.
17:24All right.
17:24Sound.
17:25Sound.
17:26All right.
17:27All right, mate.
17:36Oh, shit.
17:38Oh, no.
17:44Come here.
17:46Come here.
17:46Come here.
17:50Come here.
17:51Hey.
18:05John Spence, Cliff Snowballs, and Mark Williams.
18:17You all right, Ed?
18:19Yeah, just looking for Steve Davis.
18:24Interesting.
18:26You've got all the others, Barham, what's Davis?
18:30That old sign?
18:32Yeah.
18:33How much?
18:34£1,400.
18:36Hey, hey, 50 years from now, mate, he's been on Antiques Vogue Show.
18:42So how, how much does your granddad pay for them?
18:46What else they are? £1,400?
18:49Hey, whoo, your granddad was very...
18:52Pissed.
18:52...stute.
19:20Sorry.
19:21What's good?
19:22God, wait.
19:25Come on.
19:26Come on.
19:26Oh, shit.
19:27Come on.
19:28Please, Austin.
19:30No.
19:47Eddie?
19:50Eddie?
19:52Eddie?
19:54Eddie!
19:55Wake up and go to bed.
20:01Yeah.
20:03Oh.
20:06Get those things out of my kitchen.
20:07Hmm.
20:10Hmm.
20:28We'll talk in the morning.
20:31Yeah.
20:39Oh, God.
20:43Oh.
20:45Oh!
20:48Oh.
20:51Oh.
20:52Oh, yeah.
20:56this should be fun
21:01how much you pay for the snook balls
21:03just let me come round with you
21:06don't be stupid
21:08where you left them
21:10there's one ball missing you know
21:12interesting it isn't
21:14I need to find it
21:15how was she
21:18Pat
21:19recognise her okay
21:21haven't changed a bit
21:23no no I've got to go
21:25I don't want you to go out straight away
21:26I need to talk to you
21:27sorry I was pissed I made a racket I lost me keys
21:30if it's alright with you can we hold the bollock until later Margie
21:32when I've got a school run a kid in a wheelchair
21:34and I don't want to let her down
21:35what makes you think
21:35I've known you too long
21:37I'm going to wait to reply by the way
21:38provocation
21:39when I got pissed I was angry with you
21:40bye
21:45I've been bored to see us bad books
21:48it's Boudicare
21:49oh right
21:50oh right
21:50well with Boudicare
21:53attack is the best form of defence you see
21:55you can't let her sit you down in a corner
21:57you've got to keep moving
21:58slamming doors and things
22:06you alright love?
22:07yeah fine
22:08oh thank god for that
22:12bloody what are you doing mate?
22:13bloody mate
22:15right
22:16I think you're going to be late to school love
22:18phone home
22:19I don't want anybody worrying
22:20sorry I'm so sorry
22:21what the bloody hell are you doing?
22:22we were stopped
22:23I know I know
22:24it's an iron van I was late breaking it
22:26it's my fault I'll put my hands up to it
22:27you don't have to mate
22:28there doesn't seem to be any damage though does there?
22:32don't like a tank please
22:39I'm good
22:40me neither
22:42I haven't been funny
22:43have you had a drink?
22:50you alright Andy?
22:51yeah no worries love
22:52did you phone home?
22:53yeah
22:54my dad's coming
23:01yeah
23:17your passenger alright?
23:19yeah I know she's all fastened in
23:20yeah
23:21it was my fault
23:22the taxi was stopped
23:24it's a hire van and I underestimated stopping distance
23:27you know
23:27it's all down to me
23:29I'll still need a word though
23:30sure
23:31yeah
23:32been doing this job for a long time
23:35and when I smell mint on a driver's breath
23:49what's it say?
23:51it says you're over
23:51not much
23:53but you're over
23:58Dave
24:00Dave
24:02Paul
24:03Dave
24:09where is she?
24:11doctors
24:12Claire
24:12hmm?
24:14Diana
24:14what?
24:16well we have a tie team
24:18Diana and Dave have three bases
24:20two omelets
24:21so Paul are you really a party?
24:24yes
24:24yes I am yes
24:25to her
24:26facial hair
24:27it's freedom
24:29so what next?
24:31I'll refer you to a specialist clinic
24:33how long will that take?
24:34it won't be too long
24:35they've got to keep the waiting times down these days
24:37or they lose the funding
24:39comforting
24:41have you
24:42talked to your husband about it?
24:43not yet
24:45he's not a man who can take that sort of news
24:48go
24:49oh yeah
24:50Paul's dad said that he might be interested in them to nook balls
24:53nice one
24:53see how much you'll offer
24:55what do you pay for him?
24:56no drawing business
24:57whoa dad
24:58this egg's still running
24:59it's a cheese
25:00no it's the egg
25:03what's wrong?
25:04nothing
25:05you've been to the doctor
25:06right is this safe to eat mum?
25:08it's not cooked
25:09why have you been to the doctor?
25:12I don't know
25:14why the doctor?
25:15sore throat
25:16that's not like you
25:17isn't it?
25:19well we're bored to see you don't go to the doctor with a sore throat
25:21but he's human
25:32good day?
25:36yeah
25:38you?
25:40yeah
26:06the things you tell a stranger on a bus
26:10you've got breast cancer he said
26:11I said thanks very much
26:14courageous bloody death
26:15I don't want to hear things like that
26:18I want to hear about people crying and shaking with fear
26:21I can match that
26:22for a brave struggle against cancer it's said
26:24but struggle's not brave at all
26:26the brave thing is not to struggle
26:27to accept it
26:28to lay down and die
26:30and who's going to do that?
26:31you've got breast cancer he said
26:32rose thou art sick
26:33crying and shaking with fear
26:35the invisible worm
26:36that flies in the night
26:37in the howling storm
26:39after a brave struggle against cancer
26:41has found out thy bed of crimson joy
26:44and his dark secret love
26:47does their life destroy
26:49it won't mean much to you now girls
26:52sister kevin said
26:55but one day
26:57when you're older
26:58it's a poem about cancer
27:00I realise that now
27:02you're nearly flattened by a storm
27:04you've got breast cancer he said
27:05you survive
27:06you spring back up again
27:08but this little thing
27:10that blew on the storm
27:12has fastened onto you
27:13and it's eating away
27:16I knew he'd come to see me
27:17just before the op
27:18so I made myself look nice
27:20looked up into his eyes
27:22simpered
27:23I had to make him one to fuck me
27:25you see
27:25so he wouldn't leave a big scar
27:29two kids
27:31aww
27:31how old?
27:32fifteen and seventeen
27:34at least they're nearly reared
27:35they can manage without you
27:38I didn't breastfeed
27:40I had to carry on working
27:42so God goes
27:43I gave you those tits
27:44to feed those kids
27:45and you
27:46you lazy decadent cow
27:47you didn't use them
27:48so have some of this
27:49never mind about Iraq
27:51never mind about famine
27:52and disease
27:53I'm checking up on redundant tits
27:55I lie awake while he sleeps
27:58how can he sleep
27:59when he's partly to blame
28:01if I'd married someone with money
28:03there would have been less stress
28:04and they say stress is a cause
28:05you can get wonderful wigs these days
28:06and he's supposed to love me
28:07isn't he
28:08so why doesn't he say I'll have it
28:09why doesn't he just take it
28:10from me
28:11okay
28:12you say he doesn't know
28:14why doesn't he know
28:16if he had it
28:17I'd know
28:18I know every inch of his body
28:19and he does nothing
28:20and he does nothing
28:21but he just sleeps on
28:23in blissful
28:24bloody ignorance
28:41how'd you throw up
28:45can't you sleep
28:47no
28:48how'd you throw up
28:49it's fine
28:51everything's fine
28:58why can't you sleep
29:02I know
29:02all right
29:10the carriage awaits
29:11you bastard
29:12dad
29:13you shouldn't be on the road
29:14you felt that breathalyzer didn't you
29:15I hadn't had a drink
29:16he wasn't for going
29:17without some drunk like you
29:18picking her up
29:19and crashing
29:20I was stopped
29:20and someone shot to be from behind
29:22you felt the breathalyzer
29:23with my daughter
29:23in the back
29:24you're a danger to everybody
29:25you shouldn't be on the road
29:26I don't know what you're talking about
29:27oh don't I
29:32oh no no
29:32please don't
29:33please don't
29:34look
29:35this is an only cost you money
29:37me time
29:38money
29:38please don't
29:39oh please
29:40look
29:41I'll sue you
29:42I'll sue you if you carry on
29:44please
29:44oh please
29:45no no don't
29:46don't carry on please
29:47please
29:47oh
29:50that'll keep you off the street
29:52I'll be around with the bill
29:54you'll be around with the bill
29:56yeah
29:56is that the bill from the garage
29:58or the bill from the dentist
29:59oh
30:01oh
30:08it's gonna cost you
30:09a few hundred quid I'm afraid
30:11I wonder where
30:13what
30:14no wonder you wear a mask
30:16mask
30:33it's not right
30:34cheers
30:34Cheers.
30:51No.
30:58I thought it was you.
31:01My son wept when I told him what a kind man you are.
31:04That's all right. I just did some shopping with her wife.
31:06Oh, you must be so proud of him, must I?
31:09Nobody in my entire life has ever helped me like he did.
31:13My boy wept with joy when I told him about those snooker balls.
31:17Please, don't mention it. Don't mention it.
31:19I've got to get a move on.
31:21Time's money when this thing's not moving.
31:23If ever I can do anything for you.
31:25Yeah, I'll contact you. Don't worry about that. Nice to see you.
31:28Come on, Margie.
31:30Come on, come on, hurry up.
31:35How much?
31:37What?
31:38How much did you pay for those snooker balls?
31:41Okay, more than what I paid for them if I sold them tomorrow.
31:44Over a hundred?
31:45Yeah.
31:46Over two hundred?
31:48No.
31:55I thought I could work here, on the radio, you know, if I get banned.
31:59Think again.
32:00Anybody near Southern Cemetery need to pick up at the widow's rest to come into town.
32:07You can't do it, Ed.
32:08I've been with you ten years.
32:10Pick up required at corner of Clyde Road and Baltimore Road to go to the Crescent Sulfur.
32:14Echo 5 just dropping on my chest of cheese.
32:16Yours, Echo 5.
32:17Well, who should I say?
32:18Charlie's widow?
32:19The tattooed single mum?
32:20The ex-con who I get a grant for?
32:23Party of three at Old Trafford to Victoria Station.
32:25Desperate to catch train.
32:26Echo 12 base.
32:27I can be there in fifteen minutes.
32:29Affirmative Echo 12.
32:30We tell them five.
32:30Out.
32:32You need money.
32:33Oh.
32:35Ever so blue.
32:36Two forty-five.
32:37Here, Doc.
32:40Will it win?
32:42Do in Hanspring, son.
32:48It's off the boss's lab.
32:49He was a barman going out with a barmaid.
32:51His brother's mate.
32:52It's a stable lab at Newmarket.
32:54Almost the horsey's mouth, then.
32:55Bloody hell, Eddie.
32:56What?
32:57I can't take this.
32:59Why not?
33:00It's fifty quid.
33:02Yeah?
33:02What's up with you?
33:04I'm a friend of Margie's.
33:05But I know your circumstances.
33:07I cannot believe this.
33:08You don't want to jump in the Samaritans, right?
33:09I'm trying to do you a favour.
33:11Not have an argument with you.
33:12I might go for a pint later.
33:14Buy a newspaper.
33:16I might be treating myself to a packet of polos.
33:17You gonna stick your nose into that and all?
33:19Just take the bloody bet, will you?
33:24Balloon Rage wins.
33:25Grass monkey.
33:26Second place.
33:27Handler.
33:27You may dream of running on for third ahead of ever so blue.
33:30And see the bow.
33:31Happy girl was not placed in the bid at two to one.
33:33I'm disappointed.
33:34Thanks, mate.
33:35With a show of bidding here, try and turn the solution for seven to four.
33:38They have an image consultant.
33:39Don't tell Margie.
33:40The radio at five to one.
33:42Suited and good, it is a thirteen to two chance robot runner at nine to one.
33:46We are going to fine you five hundred pounds and ban you from driving for a year.
33:51How do you intend to pay the fine?
33:54Slowly.
33:55And the pit will.
33:55Of course he.
34:23Who looked at the entry commander at 930 on the tower?
34:48That's not fluid.
34:49Nope.
34:50It's not good or bad.
34:51It's often very good.
34:55Is your husband with you?
34:57No.
34:58Why should he be?
34:59Nope.
35:00It's just that some women bring their husbands with them.
35:03He's not here.
35:05Right.
35:07We'll take that away.
35:08You get dressed.
35:09And we'll see you in half an hour or so.
35:11Right.
35:15I watch my son squeeze a spot and I think,
35:18why can't I do it to this?
35:20Why can't I just squeeze this lump out of me?
35:34Did they ask you if you had come with your husband?
35:36No.
35:38Oh.
35:40I haven't got a lump or anything.
35:41The boob job that went a bit wrong.
35:44It's a present from my boyfriend.
35:45We went out to Spain and I had it done there.
35:52I'm sorry I couldn't be a little bit more serious for you.
35:56Mrs. McAvoy.
36:04I've got two options.
36:06One, kill myself.
36:08Two, kill the wife.
36:10You couldn't tell the truth.
36:13That's worse than option one and two combined.
36:15It's not, Ed.
36:17Tell her the truth.
36:18The whole truth.
36:19And nothing but the truth.
36:20And tell her today and get it done with.
36:25Please, God.
36:26Make something catastrophic happen.
36:29Give me a good day to bury bad news.
36:44I'm sorry, Mrs. McAvoy.
36:46No.
36:47No, I'm sorry because it's inconclusive.
36:49We can't tell either way.
36:52We can't repeat the biopsy because you're too tender.
36:55We're going to have to do it again in a week or two.
36:59I thought...
37:00I know.
37:01But it's inconclusive.
37:02I'm sorry.
37:05I'm not bold to see you.
37:24Cane Street?
37:25There.
37:26You want the flats?
37:27Yeah, moving in.
37:28That building there.
37:29Right.
37:29Thanks.
37:30Good luck.
37:31You two.
37:35Excuse me.
37:37What do you mean, you two?
37:38What?
37:39I said good luck.
37:40You said you two.
37:41Yeah.
37:42Why?
37:43That's what you say, innit?
37:44Are you a gypsy?
37:46No.
37:49You all right?
37:51What?
38:07Yeah.
38:08Yeah, meIELU.
38:08thinking how are you doing wrong?
38:11And I grew strong, and I learned how to get along.
38:15And so you're back, you're not a phase.
38:19I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face.
38:23I should have changed that stupid lock.
38:26I should have made you give your keys.
38:28If I'd have known for just one second, you'd be back to bother me.
38:32Go on, now go.
38:34Walk out the door.
38:36Just turn around now.
38:38You're not welcome anymore.
38:41But you're the one who's trying to hurt you.
38:53I've got all my life to live.
38:57I've got all my love to give.
38:59What are you doing?
39:00Hey, what are you doing?
39:02Cleaning.
39:03Everything's filthy.
39:04No one in germs.
39:06And I bloody want to be able to get sick.
39:07And I've been doing some thinking.
39:08And we're going away on holidays.
39:09It's years since we went away on holidays.
39:11And that's ridiculous.
39:12You're working, I'm working.
39:13We've only got two kids.
39:14So how is it we can never afford a bloody holiday?
39:16And when we get back, there's going to be some changes made around here.
39:18You and the kids are going to have to do a bit more around the house instead of depending
39:21on me all the time.
39:21It's ludicrous the way you all defend on me.
39:23It's better than me.
39:24You wouldn't be able to cope.
39:25None of you would be able to cope.
39:27Hey, hey, hey, hey.
39:29Hey.
39:30Hey.
39:32What is it, eh?
39:34Eh?
39:36I'm going to pause.
39:39What are you doing, home?
39:41What?
39:42Home?
39:43Come to tell you something?
39:45What?
39:49You haven't changed much either.
39:52I said Pat Bloody Tindy hadn't changed much.
39:55I should have said you haven't changed either.
39:57No, Eddie.
39:59You said Pat Bloody Tindy hadn't changed a bit.
40:03I haven't changed much, but she hasn't changed one tiny bit.
40:08For God's sake, woman, you've got me frightened.
40:10You opened me mouth.
40:37Hello, Eddie.
40:39Hello, Pat.
40:41Bob's away, Ed.
40:43So if you come in...
40:44Yeah.
40:58Oh.
41:00A lot of money.
41:02Wet sales, food sales, that.
41:04Till floats, cash for cleaners.
41:06Don't see it as money when I'm doing the account.
41:09What are you doing with them?
41:10Oh, erm...
41:12That man that I outbid for them.
41:14Sammy Nesbitt?
41:15Yeah.
41:16Yeah, he wanted them for his kids.
41:17His son, yeah.
41:18Yeah, well, I felt bad about that patent.
41:21Well, I've decided that if he wants them for 1,300, that's his last bid, 1,300.
41:26If he wants them for that, he can have them for that, and I'll, you know, I'll stand the
41:29£100 loss.
41:31That's good of you.
41:33Oh, it's nothing.
41:35I've lost Steve Davis.
41:36I'll have to replace him, of course, but, er...
41:38He don't want them.
41:40He phoned the next day.
41:42Said, thank God there was someone there more pissed than me.
41:45Right.
41:47That's, er...
41:48Settled things then.
41:50I'm...
41:50Ease me conscience a bit, you know.
41:54Are you skinned, Eddie?
41:59Yeah.
42:03I haven't got four cabs.
42:06I haven't got one.
42:08Because the one I had, I've just lost.
42:10I can't afford to spend £14.
42:13Never mind £1,400 on bloody snooker balls.
42:17I did it to impress you.
42:20I can't tell Margie, because she's going for the menopause.
42:24Even if she wasn't going for the menopause, she'd explode.
42:27But at least then it'll be conventional weapons.
42:28But because she's going through this bloody menopause,
42:30she's going to go nuclear.
42:32She'll know, of course, she'll know.
42:33I mean, you might spend a couple of hundred when you're bevied,
42:36but...
42:37If you spend £1,400, you're more than bevied,
42:39it means you're...
42:42you're trying to impress a woman.
42:44And she'll know it.
42:46She'll just...
42:47She'll just know it.
42:57I'm upstairs.
43:13I'm upstairs.
43:29We used to talk about you in school.
43:34Look at him from the nose up, I'd say.
43:39Isn't he handsome?
43:41Isn't he rugged?
43:44But it's his mouth and chin, they'd say, and it's the mouth you kiss.
43:51That's all right, I'd say.
43:56Because when you're kissing his mouth, you're looking at the good bits.
44:09It's okay.
44:12Bob's in the dirt.
44:15Oh.
44:26Sorry.
44:29Oh, I'm sorry.
44:32I'm sorry, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm...
44:47Eddie!
45:09Bob knows I'll stray.
45:11I've got needs.
45:14And he don't want me to stray with anyone special.
45:19Hence you.
45:49I've got something to tell you.
45:51A snap.
45:52Go on.
45:55No, you go first.
45:56You go first.
45:58I'll tear down the pub.
45:59You won't find it so easy to kill me in a public place.
46:13What are you having?
46:14Water.
46:15Can I have a drink?
46:16Water's a drink.
46:17I have a proper drink.
46:19Large whiskey and soda.
46:20Aye.
46:22All right.
46:43Well?
46:45Drink.
46:46It's for you.
46:48Yeah, right.
46:49Maldi, I've planned this.
46:51You can have a drink.
46:52You can have several drinks.
46:53You get nice and mellow and then I'm going to tell you.
46:55I can't drink.
46:56Oh, shit.
47:01Why can't you drink?
47:06Drink that.
47:10What are you going to tell me?
47:12Drink it.
47:14What are you going to tell me?
47:16Is there something wrong with you?
47:23What?
47:27I've got a lump.
47:37Is it?
47:39I don't know.
48:02How long have you had it?
48:03A few days.
48:08I didn't say it.
48:18I can be strong.
48:24No, I mean it.
48:26I can be strong.
48:27Come on.
48:42You dirty, stinking, fashions bastard!
48:48Give her a chance.
48:50That's sure that I love her.
48:51But more than that, I'll fucking watch her.
48:54I love her.
48:55Which makes the prospect of losing her.
48:57I want the more I'm better off.
48:58You dirty, stinking, fashions bastard!
49:09I've got a dirty little secret.
49:11All boos and lies and shuffling off and I'll keep that secret because I'm weak.
49:19She could be dying.
49:22She could be dying.
49:24She keeps that secret because she's strong.
49:32I'm not worthy of it.
49:34I told you you're worthy of it.
49:50What have you done?
49:53It needs a plaster.
50:14You've got something to tell me.
50:18Oh, it's nothing.
50:40is it cancer
50:44we don't know yet
50:47you think it is though
50:48don't you
50:50because
50:51if you didn't think it was cancer
50:53then you won't be telling us
50:54you won't be worrying us
50:56we're telling you now
50:57because if it is cancer
50:59it'll be less of a shock
51:02and if it isn't cancer
51:03well then
51:04everyone's happy
51:07if it's not cancer
51:08we'll do something
51:09we'll go on holidays
51:09right
51:11right
51:13right
51:32Ken's here
51:32Ken?
51:34yeah
51:34the cab's off the road
51:36what's wrong with it?
51:37not sure
51:53now
51:54you got me number?
51:55yeah
51:55yeah
51:56I won't be far
51:56because I'm only going to be doing the hospitals
51:58if you need a cab
51:59give us a call
51:59I'll be there
52:00don't even think of getting one off the rank
52:01right?
52:02alright
52:07I'll be fine
52:08fine
52:09fucked up
52:10insecure
52:11neurotic
52:12emotional
52:13fine
52:19statistically
52:19one of us has got breast cancer already
52:21so if it's not me
52:21then who is it?
52:22who would you give it to?
52:24I lift a spoon to her mouth
52:26500 times a day on average
52:28God has given me a child
52:29that needs me so much
52:31he would not give me cancer too
52:38that door leads to two rooms
52:40in one of them
52:41there's a couch
52:42and a box of tissues
52:43it's the crying room
52:44if they take you into there
52:46you've got it
52:48did something
52:48I haven't done
52:49since I was a kid
52:50made a deal with God
52:54God is fair
52:55he'll give it to the one
52:56that's been footloose
52:57and fancy free
52:58the happy-go-luckiest
52:59that's only fair
53:02Mrs. McAvoy
53:21it's good news
53:22there's nothing to worry about
53:24it's just a cyst
53:47I said thanks very much
53:52I can match that
53:56he would not give me cancer too
54:00I did something I've done
54:01since I was a kid
54:05made a deal with God
54:09made a deal with God
54:18on the back
54:21got the all clear
54:23it's just a cyst
54:24yeah she's alright
54:25hey
54:27Peppa not come
54:28er
54:28paper
54:29yeah we're gonna see a show
54:31have a meal
54:31do we know a good Indian
54:33and don't say tonto
54:33hey
54:34hee hee hee
54:47leukaemia boy
54:48off to Florida
54:57£1,400 benefactor
55:00Eddie McAvoy
55:04I've got several other offences to be taken into consideration
55:19Alright
55:22Hello
55:24Right
55:32I didn't mean to buy them
55:33I was just showing off in front of Pat Tinsy
55:36I thought somebody would bid more but they didn't
55:38So I stuck with them
55:40Next day I were breathalysed and I was over
55:42So I've lost my licence, my job
55:44And I got a £500 fine to pay
55:45And there was a little girl in the cab at the time
55:47And her dad took off
55:49And did £460 worth of damage to the cab
55:51And £380 worth of damage to my teeth
55:53He knocked my little thing out
55:54Anyway
55:55What else?
55:56Oh yeah
55:56I tried to salvage something from the wreckage
55:58By putting £50 on all scored ever so blue
56:00And it's still running
56:01And I think that's the lot
56:06A few hours ago
56:10When we thought you were ill
56:12None of this mattered
56:13I'm asking you to look at it from the perspective of a few hours ago
56:18I'm not saying I want you ill
56:20Obviously I don't want you ill
56:23Thanks
56:25There is something to me credit
56:26What?
56:27I'd have got out of all this mess
56:28If I'd have had sex with Pat Tinsy
56:30But I couldn't
56:32Why not?
56:36Because I love you
56:54I'm so happy
57:00I'm so happy
57:08It's a marvellous night for a moon dance
57:13With the stars of your home in your eyes
57:17It's a fabulous night
57:28Steve Davis
57:33Got a little bugger
57:37I feel like the morning
57:39To the sound
57:59I feel like the morning
58:20The wind

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