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00:01Do you want to know a secret?
00:03Us Brits love the costas.
00:06We are Spies!
00:08We are sun worshippers.
00:10Loads of fun.
00:11Cat's out of the bag now, Linda.
00:13But it really is.
00:14And with over 300 days of that glorious sunshine a year,
00:18it sure beats the cold and grey of the old UK.
00:21Ah, this is a lie.
00:23Living that dream can be blooming hard graft.
00:26Misty!
00:27My left, you're right.
00:29Stress level.
00:30Through the roof.
00:32But at the end of the working day...
00:34Girl power.
00:35Girl power, come on Sam.
00:36Forward.
00:37Booyah!
00:38The quality of life on the costas...
00:40I did it!
00:43...is priceless.
00:45Peace and love, cheers.
00:47That's why there will always be...
00:49Hold your horses.
00:51Easy go on.
00:52She floats in the weather.
00:53Sun sees Sam, what more could you ask for?
00:56Bargain-loving Brits in the sun.
00:59Today on the costas...
01:03I'm on my last pack of bacon.
01:05You'll probably need to go and get some more eggs shortly.
01:09And probably some more tomatoes.
01:11Landlords Graham and Kay bite off more than they can chew with their breakfast relaunch.
01:15Starting on the bottom and I haven't even cleaned or swept or wiped the tables down the bottom yet.
01:19Loved up Val gets the Spanish Inquisition from her oldest maids...
01:23Who is this new boy in your life?
01:25Well he is a toy boy.
01:26He is ten years young.
01:27Is he?
01:28Is he?
01:29Whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop.
01:30And we go back to a milestone year for wheeler dealer Jojo determined to get her ex-pat empire off the stocks.
01:39I'll have a go at selling anything. I'll sell snow to Eskimos.
01:48They have chosen to do these bloody roadworks today.
01:51Language.
01:52This is Graham.
01:54This is Kay.
01:55Kay's 67.
01:58Graham's my tie-by.
02:00He's 57 nearly.
02:02We've been together now for seven years.
02:04No, it's not. It's just under six.
02:06Oh, okay. You feel like seven.
02:09Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
02:10Charming.
02:11It's an important day for these Benel Madden and bar owners.
02:15Here you go, boo.
02:18Doesn't time fly when you're enjoying yourself?
02:20Yeah.
02:21Breakfast is back on the menu with a special promotion.
02:25Today we're going to do a 50% discount on all food.
02:28Doesn't that include drinks?
02:29In a small print.
02:31And hopefully that if that brings people in,
02:34they'll enjoy what they have and come back again then for full-price breakfast.
02:39It's the first week Kay's newly configured kitchen in their second bar next door's been put through its paces.
02:45Okay, so this is my kitchen.
02:49The menu is definitely, typically British.
02:52All my breakfast ingredients are in the fridge at the moment, apart from the eggs which are there.
02:55We're in a very big expat area and when holidaymakers come over they want their bacon and eggs and they want their Sunday lunch.
03:03Beans, tomatoes.
03:04There's a small English breakfast, a large English breakfast and then it's things like beans on toast, cheese on toast.
03:11The bacon is in the fridge, my sausages and my hash browns are in the freezer.
03:15I have a supplier who supplies me with my bacon, my sausage, my hash browns.
03:19The only thing is, um, the beans are quite expensive.
03:24But I, I, I...
03:25There's 57 varieties of them.
03:26Yeah.
03:27So yeah, that's it.
03:29I'm ready to go.
03:30I'll bet.
03:31The kitchen's been closed almost 12 months.
03:33I suffer with Crohn's disease.
03:36I was diagnosed back in 2006 and over the years it got worse and worse and worse.
03:42A year ago we went to Bournemouth for a friend's surprise 60th birthday party.
03:49We were only there for a couple of days.
03:50And when we were in the airport coming home I was taken ill and taken into Bournemouth Hospital.
03:55Um, subsequently I spent about three months over in the UK and ended up having, um, major surgery.
04:01Graham was obviously over here with the bar.
04:05He had to come back because there was nobody else to run the bar.
04:09So the only choice we had was to close the kitchen.
04:13Both Kay's health and profits have taken a beating.
04:16It's only sort of now that, um, I feel that I'm able to start up again.
04:21So we're starting gradually just doing breakfast.
04:24I could have done my staying in bed this morning too.
04:27No chance of taking their relaunch lying down.
04:29Um, yeah, to get the customers here you've got to compete with everybody else.
04:34I think our breakfasts are very competitive prices, yes.
04:38Um, we've, we've looked at other places.
04:40We've been there, haven't we?
04:41We've been there.
04:43I've just got to fill this one.
04:46There's no salt in it.
04:47Graham did put a, a post out on social media as an introductory offer of 50% off the breakfast.
04:53With bills mounting, they need to claw back the morning crowd.
04:57I mean, if I did 12.15, I'd be happy.
05:00Mm.
05:00But, I mean, the more we can get in there, the better, obviously.
05:04Yeah, it's word of mouth.
05:05Yeah.
05:06Hello.
05:07Hi.
05:08Okay.
05:09Can you sit anywhere, isn't it?
05:09You can sit anywhere, yeah?
05:11You here for breakfast, yes?
05:12Yeah.
05:12Okay, no problem.
05:14Running a bar is, it's a combination of things, isn't it?
05:16It's very hard work.
05:18It's the hour, it's more than anything, isn't it?
05:19So there's your breakfast menu.
05:21Lovely, thank you.
05:22I'll give you a minute to have a look at it and come back to you.
05:25It's a struggle at times, isn't it?
05:26Yeah.
05:26You do sort of snap at each other, but you've got to have it in the back of your head all
05:31the time, you know, that, hang on a second, you know, this is, this is not personal, this
05:36is stress.
05:38Yeah.
05:38But can they up the heat in the kitchen without their stress levels reaching boiling point?
05:47Hiya, sweetheart, you okay?
05:49I'm just heading off now to meet the girls.
05:52Well, today, I've got a busy day, actually, I'm meeting up with some friends.
05:56So, um, if you want to pop down a little bit later, when we've had a chance to have
06:00a good gym wagon, something to eat.
06:02So we're meeting for lunch, and I'm really, really looking forward to seeing him again
06:06and having a nice catch-up.
06:08And then, uh, we'll head off to, to the pool.
06:11Is that okay?
06:12In Albia, cosmetic queen of the costas Val has a rare day off, um, poolside.
06:18Later on, I'm also going with my, the new love of my life, Richard.
06:22Um, I'm going to support him at this pool.
06:25He plays pool in a league on a, on a Thursday.
06:30And, uh, I'm going to support him.
06:32Oh, that pool.
06:33Gotcha.
06:34Great.
06:35See you later.
06:36Bye.
06:38It's almost karaoke King Richard and Val's first anniversary, and they're marking the occasion
06:43down the pool hall.
06:45Ha!
06:45Who said romance was dead?
06:46Well, this is Richard, and, um, yeah, that was when he was a virgin on me, on me trips.
06:52So everybody gets welcomed as a virgin when they're on their very first trip with me.
06:57Are we in the honeymoon phase?
06:59Uh, yeah, we don't live together, and we, we have our own homes.
07:03Um, so, um, we don't see each other all the while because we're both very, very busy working.
07:09So, you know, um, we probably see each other two or three times a week.
07:14Val's seizing this rare window to mark their milestone together.
07:20I went to his, um, presentation.
07:22He's got some awards for his, um, his pool.
07:26And, um, yeah, that was a picture then, and I've got some of him actually getting his, um,
07:31awards.
07:31Yeah.
07:32So he's very, he's very good at pool.
07:33Very good.
07:34You got skills, Val?
07:36I think we're going to have a little friendly first.
07:38He's going to show me a few tricks, I think, because I'm not very good.
07:41I can't remember the last time I had a pool cue in my hands, but it's a long time ago.
07:46I'm always told I never hold the cue properly.
07:48I think I'll just whack it at the table and hope the balls go in the holes.
07:52Holes?
07:53Pops?
07:53With a cord.
07:54Yeah.
07:55It's pockets, Val.
07:58Before their big night, a chance reunion with old pals here on holiday.
08:02Hiya, girls.
08:03Hiya.
08:04Hiya.
08:04Good to see ya.
08:06And he and Sue are sisters, so we're childhood friends.
08:12We've been friends since the word dot.
08:14Youngery.
08:16Getting that way.
08:17Oh, I am.
08:17With 60 years' worth of stories to catch up on, you might need longer than a lunch.
08:22I'm going to introduce him to Richard.
08:24He's a nice fella.
08:25I think they will, I think they will like him.
08:28I think they will.
08:29Who are you trying to convince, Val?
08:30Police Gabby Oars.
08:32He's a bit of a charmer.
08:35Yeah, a bit of a charmer.
08:36But is he charming enough to win over Val's best buddies?
08:42Coming up.
08:43I didn't expect so many people to come all at the same time, so I'm trying to get everything
08:49done as quick as I can.
08:51Landlords Kay and Graeme's breakfast promotion piles on an extra helping of pressure.
08:55Smalls, sorry about the wait.
08:57I'm sorry, thank you.
08:58I'll bring you some knives and forks now, and I'll bring you a toast.
09:00I'll give you a little face on.
09:02Oh, hi, hi.
09:03And wheeler dealer Jojo's determined to win over Brits looking for a bargain in her backroom
09:08mini-mart.
09:10Gotta love a sausage.
09:19To me, to you.
09:21To me, no, to you.
09:22Very, very stressed.
09:24Relocating to the costas is no mean feat.
09:27Working in the heat, it is draining.
09:29I just have to muddle through it.
09:31So, sweat a bit.
09:34A life in the sun isn't all sangria and siestas.
09:38And don't bring him back.
09:39Taking the plunge...
09:40Woo-hoo!
09:41...takes a lot of hard work.
09:43From glitz and glam to this.
09:45Morning, now, how are you?
09:50Come in.
09:51I'll take you out of the shop.
09:53I've just come some black pudding.
09:55One grafter who's always had to find creative ways to make ends meet is savvy saleswoman Jojo.
10:01Did you like the white pudding that I got you last time?
10:04It's a bit different to black pudding, but just as nice.
10:06It's nice, yeah.
10:08It's good.
10:09And we're stepping back to 2021, when she was selling the best of British in her bargain basement.
10:14Sorry, bargain garage.
10:16Right, there's your black pudding, and you know you liked the white pudding last time.
10:21I'll give you a little free sample, okay?
10:23There you go, no worries.
10:25Super, super.
10:26I do all the English stock.
10:27They are things that you just can't get over here.
10:30That one's five euros.
10:32Oh, my God.
10:32That sounds like a bargain.
10:34It doesn't matter, right?
10:35I'll see you again soon when the black pudding runs out.
10:39I'll let you know when the pie's coming.
10:41Yeah, I can just be sitting here watching telly, and someone knocks on the door and say,
10:45you've got to stop everything you're doing and just serve them.
10:47Everyone comes.
10:48It's like a community.
10:49They all come.
10:49They can knock on the door.
10:50Have a cup of coffee while they're buying their sausages or bacon.
10:54They are things that you just can't get over here.
10:57Baked beans are always good sellers.
10:59You could be onto something.
11:00Catering for Brits who miss our favourite foods.
11:04Curries.
11:04People love their curries.
11:06Jams.
11:08Sauces.
11:09They just can't get enough.
11:10So long as they love it enough to keep that till ringing.
11:13When I moved in this house, it's rent to buy.
11:16I pay the $4.50 a month and that eventually comes off the mortgage.
11:19So I'm hoping to buy this house outright.
11:22That's a lot of curries.
11:25Want a few things today?
11:27Yes, I'd like to order some bacon and stuff like that if you'd like.
11:29Yeah?
11:30Okay.
11:31Rob buys in bulk from me.
11:32I buy a big pack of bacon and a big pack of sausages.
11:35And Robert make lots of lovely meals with it, won't you?
11:39Bargain bangers.
11:40Don't mind if I do.
11:42I know I'm the cheapest on bread and I'm the cheapest on bacon.
11:45A lot of people come to me for my bacon and my sausages.
11:49Gotta love a sausage.
11:51Ooh, with mash and onion gravy.
11:53Yes.
11:53I think that's about all that I need today.
11:55I just naturally like selling to people.
11:59And I make it work.
12:00I make it work living in Spain.
12:01I'm surviving.
12:03To thrive, not just survive, Jojo has a plan.
12:13Shall I show you a moment?
12:14Is it a small breakfast, large breakfast or something?
12:16Small breakfast, please.
12:16Small breakfast with beans or tomatoes?
12:18Beans, please.
12:19Beans, okay.
12:20Half-price brekkies have gone down a treat in Benham, Maddena.
12:23Can we have a small breakfast?
12:24One small.
12:26The kitchen's been closed for just shy of a year,
12:29so it's vital landlords Kay and Graham get those bums on seats.
12:33Okay, thanks very much.
12:35I mean, there was one time when I thought,
12:37oh, are we going to have many come in at all?
12:39And then they sort of come in and I thought, oh, that's not too bad.
12:42And then they just kept coming and kept coming and kept coming.
12:45Hanging on to new customers once their promotion's over will be harder.
12:49No worries. It's all right. No worries.
12:50You got wired by?
12:52Yes. Yeah.
12:53It's an awkward one.
12:54It's because our suppliers' costs have gone up,
12:57which means our costs have gone up,
13:00but people still want a cheap breakfast.
13:02Okay.
13:02Yeah?
13:03Terrace is full.
13:04Oh, right, okay.
13:05You're starting on the bottom,
13:06and I haven't even cleaned or swept or wiped the tables down the bottom yet.
13:08Well, they were a bit small weight then.
13:11I didn't expect so many people to come all at the same time,
13:14so I'm trying to get everything done as quick as I can.
13:18But I'm pleased that we have got this many people and hopefully, you know, some of them decide to come back.
13:25So it's good in that way.
13:27I just got to see to my eggs and then it is.
13:30Don't overdo it, Kay.
13:31Crohn's has a lot of side effects, and one of them is something they call polymyalgia,
13:38which is inflammation of the muscles, so I get a lot of muscle pain in my arms, my legs, my chest, across my shoulders.
13:44I have a little bit of a backlog at the moment, but I'm sure we'll make that up soon.
13:50I think the worst part is trying to deal with the pain.
13:53I tend to get pain every day.
13:55I take a lot of painkillers, but my attitude to it is I won't let it rule me.
14:02It's beans, beans are good for your heart.
14:04The more you eat, the more you fart.
14:07I don't want to stop being who I am or doing what I'm doing because I've got this.
14:12I don't want to be sitting in the corner just thinking, right, I'm ill, I can't do this, I can't do that.
14:16I'm small, sorry about the wait.
14:18I'll bring you some knives and forks now, and I'll bring you toast.
14:21You try to work through it.
14:23I'm on my last pack of bacon.
14:26You'll probably need to go and get some more eggs shortly, and probably some more tomatoes.
14:32I think it is a good thing that the kitchen's back open and seeing her in there is, yeah, it's good.
14:38OK, he's not the only one who's been through the mill.
14:42Back in 2009, I got diagnosed with bowel cancer.
14:47The tumour had grown so much that I had to have stoma fitted.
14:52Went into a hospital, had the operation, stoma fitted.
14:55I was back at work in six weeks.
14:57In the full, full, full working days.
15:00About six years after that, I had an arse attack, and then that was followed by another one at the hospital.
15:14I ended up doing a double hyperpass.
15:18That hurt a little bit.
15:20It took me out of work for five, six weeks.
15:22It weren't long before I was back.
15:24You just carry on.
15:25Those were tomatoes.
15:35Their first food service in almost 12 months has kept the catering couple on their toes.
15:40So, that's on the last one, isn't it?
15:42Yeah, so I'm going to worry about that for a minute.
15:46But Kay's cooked up some surprise R&R for Graham, if they ever get on top of the breakfast rush.
15:52This is Harry, my gorgeous Harry.
16:09Harry loves people.
16:11Harry loves other dogs.
16:13He loves his walks.
16:14Don't you, Harry?
16:15You love walking.
16:16And he goes in the pool and he goes swimming.
16:19Harry, look.
16:22When we first got him as a puppy, he ate the house.
16:30He ate nine remote controls.
16:33He ate all the irrigation.
16:35All the door frames.
16:38Didn't you?
16:38Telephones.
16:40He was a nightmare.
16:45Hey.
16:46So, it's turned out a most beautiful dog, but we had to go through a lot of heartache, eh?
17:00Here she comes, serviced with a smile.
17:03You look lovely today, darling.
17:04In Albia, love struck vows, taking a leap of faith, inviting her oldest mates to meet her new fling, Richard.
17:11I've just arrived at the restaurant.
17:14I've known Annie and Sue for, I would say, 60 years.
17:19Richard said the other way we came here.
17:21And he went, I ain't going there again.
17:22I had to cook my own dinner.
17:23They bring it out.
17:24They're not just here to dine out on childhood stories.
17:29I've tried to spend time with them, but because I'm so busy, it's been a little bit difficult.
17:34It's my busiest time of year.
17:36So, but yeah, looking forward to a lovely lunch today.
17:39Oh, nice.
17:41Lovely.
17:41See, I would have enjoyed that, but she's very fattening.
17:47Will her choice of fella go down well with her most fierce and loyal critics?
17:51Who's this new boy in your life?
17:53Boy?
17:56Well, he is a toy boy.
17:58He is 10 years young.
17:59Is he?
17:59Yeah, his name's Richard, and he's a, he's from Bristol.
18:05Oh, is he?
18:05Yeah.
18:06That's where we're going.
18:07Yeah.
18:08Yeah, and yeah, because I went over in the summer.
18:11I met his mum and dad.
18:12Sounds promising.
18:14I think the mum was only 18 when she had Richard.
18:18She's nine years older than me by the time he was born.
18:20So he said, you're near me mum's edge, and then you are mine.
18:23Yeah, right.
18:24Okay.
18:25Cheeky.
18:26Time to redeem yourself, Richard.
18:27If you can win over Val's mate with that gift of the gab.
18:31I think you're in there.
18:32Ah, here's Richard now.
18:34Oh, here he is.
18:35Hiya.
18:36How are you?
18:37Hiya.
18:38Are you all right?
18:40Your wife.
18:40This is Sue, and this is Annie.
18:44Your child.
18:44Yeah, pleased to meet you.
18:47May I sit?
18:48Of course, of course.
18:50Richard's a very caring person.
18:53He looks after me.
18:54He likes to look after me.
18:56Very hardworking as well.
18:57Very hardworking.
18:59And I respect that, because I'm a hard worker.
19:01I understand your childhood friends.
19:03Yes.
19:04We've known Val since we were very small.
19:06Well, I'm only six months older than Val.
19:10And I met him at a party, and we ended up sitting at the bar together.
19:16And then just by accident, after a few more glasses of wine, we fell into each other's faces.
19:23Yeah, that's how it happened.
19:25And the rest is history.
19:27Time will tell whether Val's friends fall for his charms so easily.
19:31Lovely to meet you both.
19:32I hope your report on me hasn't been too scathing.
19:34No, it's all, it's all, you're absolutely charming.
19:38Richard seems a really lovely, genuine kind of guy.
19:43And I just wish them both every happiness.
19:47She deserves it, yeah.
19:49Right, time to go?
19:50I think it is, isn't it?
19:51Yeah, yeah, lovely to see you.
19:52I'll try and catch it with you tomorrow when I get back.
19:56Yeah, so it was nice to introduce Richard to the girls.
19:59I think they approved.
20:01I think they did, anyway.
20:03I hope so.
20:04I did my best.
20:05Yeah.
20:06Yeah, I am me and that's what you get.
20:08See you tomorrow at some point.
20:09God bless.
20:10Bye.
20:11So we're now off to Paul.
20:13Richard's going to show me a few moves, I believe.
20:16And then we're going to, I'm going to support him when he wins the match.
20:22And I'm sure you'll win.
20:24Yeah.
20:25I'll do my best.
20:26More importantly, can Val win over Richard's makes as well as he did hers?
20:31Coming up.
20:35How have we done?
20:36I haven't got a clue.
20:38Landlords Graham and Kay find out if their breakfast bonanza's broken even or just broken there.
20:44I feel shattered.
20:46Cheap as chips.
20:47And accommodating Jojo will do whatever it takes to get her new delivery service off the ground.
20:53As long as you need me, I'll be here.
20:55What can I say?
20:56That is superb.
21:07Packing up all her English food that she loves.
21:10She loves baggots.
21:12Baggot mad.
21:13She's only human.
21:15We're revisiting food flogger Jojo and the time she launched her new taste at home delivery service.
21:21You know, Jojo, give it a go.
21:23I've got a delivery to do this afternoon at Alameda.
21:28Passada, it's another campsite.
21:30A little old couple.
21:31If this latest idea catches on with the expats, she could be quids in.
21:36They're proper old school.
21:38They like a bit of a paste.
21:40The home comforts of England, really, that they can't get.
21:43Cushty.
21:44Everyone calls me Delgail anyway.
21:46I'll have a go at selling anything.
21:48I'll sell snow to Eskimos.
21:51Moistu, Moistu.
21:52I think I'm just a bit of a wheeler and dealer.
21:55You know, if I could buy something for a fiver and sell it for a tenner, that's what I like doing.
22:00Because everyone likes a bargain in Spain.
22:03I sort of give them that bargain.
22:04I'm not running a charity by any means, but I'm a lot cheaper than the local stores.
22:09That's heavy, that box.
22:13That lot comes to 42 euros.
22:15Cheap as chips.
22:17Delivering value and expat favourites.
22:19There could be mileage in this new venture.
22:23Yeah, I always keep within a five-kilometre radius, really.
22:26If I go beyond that, I have to charge because it's petrol.
22:30Fortunately, Clive and Linda are just ten minutes away.
22:35Oh, from this delivery, I'll make about a tenner.
22:37And that covers my fuel and it covers all the food again and it gives me a little bit of money in my pocket.
22:43How you doing?
22:44Got your food.
22:45You might make 50 quid for yourself in a day, which is a good day's wage out in Spain.
22:49Got all your good bits.
22:51I've even got your parsnips.
22:52Oh, just what we want?
22:54Wow.
22:55For Jojo's idea to work, she has to go the extra mile.
22:59Right, I've got you some mushy peas.
23:00Who mushy peas?
23:02Your favourite, apparently.
23:03Oh, yeah.
23:04It's paying off with Linda.
23:05And I've got your faggots.
23:07Oh, me faggots.
23:09Lovely.
23:10Jo, that is lovely.
23:11Now, what do we owe you, my love?
23:13It's 42.50.
23:15Call it 40 for cash.
23:17So long as you're not out of pocket, Jojo.
23:19We use Jojo's service because we've got no transport, we can't get to the shops.
23:24She delivers to us, so we're very, very lucky.
23:28As long as you need me, I'll be here.
23:30All right.
23:31What can I say?
23:31That is superb.
23:33Oh.
23:34All right, we'll take it easy.
23:35I've got to get back.
23:36Your delivery service could be a runaway success.
23:39Right, see you later, darling.
23:41Take care.
23:41Thanks everyone so much, Jojo.
23:42No worries.
23:43Bye.
23:44It wasn't just a good year for business.
23:46Another milestone needed marking.
23:49I'm off-ski.
23:50I'm going to have a glass of wine.
23:51I deserve it.
23:53Your 50th deserve bringing out the fancy stuff.
24:01Is it to the left?
24:02To the left, yeah.
24:03You've never been here, have you?
24:04No, that's what's said.
24:05I don't know what it is.
24:07Pool shark Richards queued up a pre-anniversary date with a difference for Val.
24:12Now we're in Alfaz del Pee to have a practice of pool.
24:16Well, that's a big step.
24:18And then Richard is going to be playing his game.
24:21So Val, this is where I play pool.
24:23I know you haven't been to see me play here before, but this is the pool table.
24:27Yeah.
24:28That is the bar.
24:29Yeah, I worked that one out, yeah.
24:31Hardly racking up favour.
24:33Thought this was a friendly warm-up before Val meets your mates at tonight's match.
24:37Well, we're top of the league.
24:39We've got the best players in our team in the league.
24:42We're going to win the league.
24:43So I'm ultimately confident.
24:46I'll let you break.
24:48Hey, you might not get shot.
24:50Oh, me too, sure, Richard.
24:52Big head.
24:53I'm excited for Val to see that I've got skills that she's not seen before.
24:58Oh, hello.
25:06All right, Val, pocket your pride and play on rich.
25:10I'll be as lucky mascot, won't I, tonight.
25:14So I'm sure he'll win, hands down.
25:16Whether he beats me is another story.
25:19A comedy of errors.
25:25Don't leave this for me.
25:30Why do you open your mouth when you're having a shot?
25:35Oh, that was close.
25:37With seven reds on the base, you need a break, Val.
25:40My pool skills are non-existent, really.
25:42I mean, I have played pool in the past, but it's been a long, long time.
25:46Straight down the middle.
25:48Hey!
25:52Oh, he's beat me.
25:54Chalking up to experience, eh?
25:56Oh, I tried to pop away for you.
25:57Oh, would I have got two more?
26:00Would I have got two more?
26:01No, you wouldn't.
26:02You wouldn't.
26:03Would I?
26:04Good spin there, Rich.
26:05Hmm.
26:07Oh, he's very good.
26:08He's very good.
26:09I wouldn't expect anything less.
26:10Because I know he's a good player.
26:13Yeah.
26:13So, he just needs to prove that to me, really.
26:17That's love for you.
26:19But there's one sport where Val reigns victorious.
26:22All my details are on here.
26:24My name's Val.
26:25And my telephone number and everything.
26:27This is for November.
26:29Okay.
26:30She's great at selling cosmetics.
26:32I'm far better at that than playing with balls.
26:36You can message me.
26:37Can you leave that here?
26:38So, if somebody take a look at it and like something?
26:41Yes, of course.
26:42She never switches off.
26:44I wouldn't be number one if I did, would I?
26:46An undefeated champ.
26:48But will Rich score tonight?
26:50Time to rack and roll.
26:52When Benidorm's sweethearts Val and Rich first met,
26:58they fell into each other's lips in a bar.
27:01Spain is romantic.
27:03The atmosphere, the sun, the way of life.
27:07It's just relaxing.
27:08You've got me.
27:09And I've got my husband.
27:11You're not the only ones who are in the mood for amor on the costas.
27:16My best chat-up line for when I see someone in Benidorm is,
27:18are you an artist?
27:19Because you're great at drawing me in.
27:21I bet their face was a picture after that.
27:23We don't do chat-up lines.
27:24We just get the chat-up lines to us, do we?
27:26Still then, Pam?
27:28Ah, I've got one for you.
27:30Do you come here often?
27:31No.
27:31Do you know what would look good on you?
27:33What?
27:33Me.
27:35Oh, dear.
27:36Question is, would any of these Corkers get you feeling caliente on the costas?
27:40What happens in Benidorm?
27:42Stares in Benidorm.
27:43Understood, Kerry.
27:44Understood.
27:45Grab your coat, you leave it.
27:47Moving on.
27:48Any other gems?
27:50We've been married 44 years.
27:52We haven't got a chat-up line.
27:54I've never had a chat-up line, I'm sorry.
27:57Well, you must have had one once, James, because it worked on Sue.
28:00And at 44 years married, that's not the only milestone worth celebrating.
28:04Hello!
28:11Happy birthday!
28:13Woo!
28:14You're grateful!
28:15Happy birthday!
28:17It's my birthday!
28:18Woo!
28:18Woo!
28:19Woo!
28:20So today is my birthday party.
28:24Everyone's coming, it's going to be great.
28:26I'm so excited about tonight.
28:28It's party girl Jojo's delayed 50th soiree,
28:32as she didn't get a chance to celebrate it last year.
28:35I really wanted a masquerade ball.
28:37I just really wanted that mystique of everyone turning up
28:40with a mask on and maybe a nice outfit.
28:45Ooh la la.
28:46Best mates Johnny and Bambi are on hand to help with party prep.
28:50I'm really grateful for friends like Bambi.
28:51She looked after me when I first come over, she really did.
28:54She took me under her wing, introduced me to everybody.
28:58If it wasn't for Bambi, I don't know that I would have made it out here.
29:01Yeah, everyone's getting here about 7.30,
29:03so do a quick reveal of everybody in their masquerade outfits.
29:08Me, I've got my beautiful wig.
29:10Lovely.
29:10Yeah, it should be quite funny.
29:11I don't think I'm going to fit through the door,
29:13but I can't wait to see it.
29:14I can't wait to see it.
29:15With only a couple of hours until guests arrive,
29:18a nosy at the dress will have to wait, Bambi.
29:21So I didn't want a 50 cake,
29:23so I've just got a red velvet one instead.
29:25Oh, that's nice.
29:26And I've got a 5-0 to go on top.
29:28Well, you're 51, love, but who's counting?
29:31I don't feel 50 anyway, or 51, so I'm just not good for it.
29:35If I could be 50 for another year,
29:37I can change some of the rubbish that happened last year
29:40and I could have a good year.
29:41Yes, my friend Bambi bought me
29:43a bottle of champagne for my birthday.
29:46I love being spoiled.
29:48Gally's spoiled me all the time,
29:49but I haven't got Gally to spoil me now,
29:51so if friends want to spoil me, let them.
29:53Husband Gary died from cancer
29:56just before they were due to start a new life in Spain.
30:00Gary would have loved this party.
30:02He would have been best dressed.
30:03I've dressed him in some horrendous clothes.
30:07He would have been Louis XIV, I'm telling you now,
30:09and he would have worn it well.
30:10He always looked good in a wig.
30:13Meanwhile, back in catering,
30:14how's the fine dining coming along for tonight's fancy do?
30:18That's really nice.
30:20Spaghetti bolognese.
30:22Nothing says French Revolution cuisine like spag bol.
30:26Just let them eat cake, Jojo.
30:34I feel shattered.
30:36Looking forward now to a bit of relaxation.
30:38Ben-O-Mad-Dinner Brits have eaten Kay and Graeme
30:41out of house and home
30:42with their half-price breakfast relaunch.
30:45Really, really good, really enjoyed it.
30:46Probably the best breakfast in the area, I would say.
30:48So spread the word, Daniel.
30:51It's been a good success, yes, the breakfast service.
30:53We've had a lot more people in than we expected.
30:56But have they hit their target of 12 to 15 covers?
31:00So how have we done?
31:02I haven't got a clue.
31:0331, 32, 33.
31:0533.
31:0633 breakfast.
31:07Yeah.
31:08Happy with that?
31:09Yeah.
31:10Yeah.
31:10Raise your cuppers and toast their successful relaunch.
31:13So now I've booked Graeme in and me in
31:17for a nice little massage
31:18and come back all refreshed for the evening, I hope.
31:24They're heading 40 minutes west to Monda
31:27to road test Reiki,
31:29a Japanese relaxation technique.
31:32Hi, I'm Holly.
31:33Nice to meet you.
31:33Hello, I'm Kay.
31:34Hello, how are you?
31:35Are you okay?
31:36It's a world away from dishing up bangers and beans.
31:39Just choose a seat each,
31:41and you just take your shoes off
31:43so you can get nice and comfortable.
31:45So tell me why you're here today.
31:49What's happening?
31:50We run a bar in Ben Ladiner.
31:52Yeah.
31:53It's been a bit of a stressful time,
31:54and I just thought that it would be nice
31:56to bring Graeme somewhere
31:58that you get a bit of relaxation
32:01before we go back to the bar.
32:03Okay.
32:03And today we're just going to do some breathing techniques
32:06to help calm your energy,
32:08your nervous system,
32:09bring you back in balance and harmony.
32:11Breathing.
32:12This is exercise I can get on board with.
32:17So the intention for any of my sessions
32:19is to help people feel more relaxed
32:22in balance with their energy,
32:25listen to your ears and what you can hear.
32:26Can you hear the birds?
32:28And just walk away feeling a new person.
32:35They're Sparco.
32:36I'm not sure how present they are,
32:37but they're certainly relaxed.
32:40I think it's very important
32:41to have time away from the bar.
32:43I know we don't have a lot of time away from the bar,
32:45but, I mean, maybe I shouldn't say this,
32:47but a couple of people have been talking
32:49to me about,
32:49oh, you're going to start doing Sunday lunch again.
32:51You're going to start doing Sunday lunch.
32:52And it's been something that's going around in my head.
32:55But Sunday is our day off.
32:57Hang about.
32:58Wasn't the point to improve your work-life balance, Kay?
33:01I have said to Graham,
33:03if, if, a big if,
33:05I was to even consider doing Sunday lunch again,
33:09then we would have to change the day off
33:12because we do have to have a day off.
33:17Can't we have it on different days?
33:18No.
33:23If I feel I can do a bit more,
33:24then I'll do a bit more.
33:25Again, we're just looking at it one day at a time
33:27and see how it goes.
33:29Hopefully enough to build that up
33:31to get somebody else to...
33:32Yeah.
33:33...take your place.
33:34And then...
33:35That's what we're thinking, isn't it?
33:37That would be good.
33:38Yeah.
33:41The pennies finally dropped
33:43on the need to put themselves
33:44and Chrisley their health first.
33:49Do you reckon you're ready
33:49to go back to the hustle bus
33:51or are you ready to sleep?
33:53Oh, sleep would be good.
33:54Sleep would be good, yeah.
33:56Not before that late shift back at the bar.
33:58If they can stay upright.
34:00Good luck with everything.
34:01Thank you very much.
34:02It certainly wasn't what I expected.
34:03And I will pop down into your bar.
34:06All right.
34:06Have a drink.
34:07OK.
34:07It was good.
34:08It did make you feel relaxed, I think.
34:10Do you do a Sunday roast?
34:12Maybe in a few weeks' time.
34:13Yeah.
34:14Take care.
34:15Bye.
34:16Bye.
34:16Bye.
34:18Relaxed and ready for a busy shift in the bar,
34:20especially now your punters
34:22have lined their stomachs.
34:23I'll sit this one out
34:24and I'll inspect my eyelids.
34:30Coming up.
34:31Shut up, Richard.
34:32Oh, oh.
34:34It's cheerleader Val's turn
34:35to try and impress Richard's mates
34:37all side.
34:38The big-looking mascot,
34:39life-size.
34:42Lady Jojo Pompadour.
34:43That's me.
34:45And birthday girl Jojo
34:46prepares to make an entrance.
34:48It's not a pompadour French.
34:49Wait a minute.
34:50Let's get this right.
35:03So we were thinking
35:04we were going to have four players tonight.
35:06We were one short,
35:07but we're going to make the best of it.
35:09Fortunately, we got Val
35:10as our lucky mascot tonight.
35:12Quality time together scarce,
35:14so Val stands by her man
35:16down the Benidorm pool hall
35:17to meet his mates.
35:19They normally have four in the team,
35:21but one has let them down
35:23at the last minute
35:24and nobody else can step in
35:26unless they've been ready
35:26should be four days ago.
35:29So they're going to lose points
35:31and they're top of the league
35:32at the moment.
35:33I'd like to introduce my teammates,
35:35Phil,
35:35the best player in Benidorm,
35:36if you ask him.
35:39And Kevin is second best player in Benidorm.
35:44If you ask him, yeah, definitely.
35:44And where do you come?
35:46Seven for eight.
35:47The captain is concerned
35:52they could lose because of this.
35:54I'll be there, boys.
35:55Cheer you on.
35:56You've got no way you're going to lose.
35:57No way.
35:58We're going to need you tonight, love.
35:59Yeah, absolutely.
36:00I'm the big looking mascot,
36:02life-size.
36:04I'm looking forward
36:06to supporting Richard
36:07with his game, yeah.
36:08Yeah, it's not very often
36:09I do this because
36:10I'm just so busy,
36:12so I work day and night
36:14so it's very rare
36:16that I have a night
36:17that I can just go out
36:19and, you know, watch him.
36:21But will luck be a lady tonight?
36:24Not real, Jed.
36:26What I like about the pool league
36:27is the fact that
36:28it's a little piece of home.
36:30I used to play pool
36:31every Thursday
36:32in leagues back in the UK
36:34for 30 years.
36:36I don't know how much longer
36:42that's going to last
36:42because my back's going,
36:43the eyes are going.
36:45But I still enjoy the competition.
36:48I'm still, well, ranked
36:50as one of the better players
36:52here in the region,
36:53so I don't want to compete
36:55for as long as I can.
36:56While your body holds out
36:57by the sound of it.
37:00So every game matters
37:01for Richard.
37:02The score is not looking good
37:04at the moment
37:04due to the loss
37:06of one of our players
37:07and a couple of
37:09unfortunate results
37:10were up against it.
37:12Best we could hope
37:13for is a draw
37:14if we were playing.
37:19I'm not being very lucky
37:21as a mascot, am I?
37:26Maybe not in pool,
37:27but lucky in love.
37:29My life has never been better
37:30than it has been
37:31since I've been without.
37:34Yeah, she brings joy
37:35to my world
37:36in every possible way.
37:38I wish I could see
37:39more of her,
37:39but we're both busy people
37:40and that's just
37:41the way that is.
37:42Well cued, Phil.
37:43Lovely shot.
37:44Well done.
37:46She's an amazing girl.
37:47She's helped me
37:48in a number of ways.
37:50I'd like to think
37:51I'd help her too.
37:52Yes, you do.
37:55Yeah, and we're good
37:56for each other.
37:58Really pleased I met her.
37:59Yeah, she's my world.
38:03Shot, Rich.
38:04Oh, that was close.
38:06Ever the loyal supporter.
38:07Oh.
38:08Oh, dear.
38:14Bad luck, darling.
38:16Eh?
38:16Bad luck.
38:18Way he goes sometimes.
38:19Can't win them all,
38:20can you?
38:21Eh?
38:21I've had a fantastic day
38:24today.
38:25It's been great
38:25to spend some time
38:26with Val,
38:26quality time.
38:28It's a shame
38:28the pool's not going
38:29our way,
38:29but, you know,
38:30you win some,
38:31you lose some.
38:31I've won the best one,
38:32that's all that matters
38:33to me.
38:33Aw, you big softie.
38:36From where I'm sitting,
38:38the scores on the doors
38:39are looking good.
38:46Outfit, wig,
38:49underskirt, mask, gloves, done.
38:52In Mahina,
38:53it's less than an hour
38:54until Jojo's 50th birthday
38:56masquerade ball.
38:58Here we go.
39:00A little taste
39:01of what it's going to look like
39:01when it's on.
39:02Beautiful feathers,
39:04gorgeous.
39:05I'm a sophisticated girl,
39:07don't you know?
39:10She's going as the French king
39:11Louis XV's famous mistress
39:14Madame de Pompadour.
39:15I'm not even sure
39:16if she is,
39:17but I'm just going to go
39:20as a lady of that era,
39:23I suppose.
39:24Lady Jojo Pompadour.
39:26Yes, that's me.
39:28Well, I've got about
39:29a half hour
39:30before everyone arrives.
39:31I need to get my wig sorted
39:32and my costume on.
39:35Listen, I'll get out
39:35of your boudoir
39:36and leave you to it.
39:37Meanwhile,
39:37best mate Bambi
39:38stuck in the scullery.
39:41I absolutely hate
39:42washing up.
39:43I hate jobs
39:44around the house.
39:45I find them so boring.
39:46I'd rather be doing
39:47something else
39:48like dancing
39:48or playing with my dogs.
39:49No dogs out tonight,
39:51but I can promise dancing.
39:53So where's your frock?
39:53I'm going to be wearing
39:55a green outfit.
39:57Fairy type creature,
39:59I think.
40:00Without the wings.
40:02Intriguing.
40:03And back in the 18th century...
40:06Ooh, I'm ready.
40:09Madame Pompadour
40:10to your rescue.
40:12Let's partay.
40:14And I am French.
40:17No, is Madame Pompadour French?
40:18Wait a minute.
40:19Let's get this right.
40:20Oui, oui.
40:21Ooh la la.
40:23I love the outfit.
40:24It's been in the wardrobe
40:25for a year,
40:26but it's all come together
40:27tonight for my birthday.
40:30Is it Trey's own gentlemanly
40:32to ask what lies beneath?
40:34I'm not stupid.
40:35I've got my trainers on.
40:37Woo-hoo!
40:38I'm partying.
40:39I'm dancing tonight.
40:42Your first guest
40:43didn't get the footwear memo.
40:46Oh, my God.
40:48Look at you.
40:49I love you.
40:50You look fantastic.
40:52Mwah.
40:53Entree.
40:54Woo, let's...
40:56Entree.
40:57Woo.
40:59And before you can say
41:00Où est la discothèque,
41:02Madame Jojo's glamorous
41:03masquerade ball
41:04is in full swing.
41:06Hop, hop, hop.
41:07Hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop.
41:10I'm actually...
41:11I've got sweat running
41:12down my nose.
41:14It's so heavy.
41:16You're not exactly
41:17dressed for the Spanish weather.
41:18What?
41:20How lovely, darling.
41:23And as things hot up,
41:24the revelers really start
41:25to let their wigs down.
41:28I want to sing.
41:29I want Tommy to sing.
41:31I want Ray to sing.
41:32I want Bambi and Johnny dancing.
41:34The party's going really well
41:36because we all know each other
41:37and we're having a lovely time.
41:39It's a fitting relaunch
41:40for Jojo
41:41with her new friends.
41:43Yay!
41:44Oh, it's so hot in my wig
41:47and my mask.
41:49That's why I'm glowing so much
41:51and my hair.
41:53Oh, God.
41:53Don't wear wigs, guys.
41:54It's no good for you.
41:55Wigs are no good.
41:58Noted.
41:59You may feel a hot mess,
42:00but I'd say
42:01your party's on fire.
42:02Do you know what?
42:09I've really enjoyed today.
42:10Some really great mates I've got.
42:12Bambi, Johnny, Rob.
42:14They're great people
42:15to have in Spain.
42:16Really enjoyed my night.
42:17Really enjoyed my birthday.
42:1950-51.
42:20Shh, shh.
42:21It's a 50-50.
42:23You guys can show yourself out now.
42:25We've got some partying to do.
42:28See you later.
42:29Remember to drink a pint of water
42:32before you go to bed.
42:34Oh, never mind.
42:37Next time on The Costas,
42:39a chip shop gets an urgent touch-up
42:41in Benidorm.
42:42When are you opening again?
42:43Smell it.
42:43There's no way.
42:44Ex-pat grandad Paul's
42:45got an important date to keep.
42:47It's a pressure day today.
42:48I want to be able to play
42:49with my grandchildren.
42:50And we look back
42:50when Ant organised
42:51an urgent animal rescue.
42:53Everything had been destroyed.
42:54All the cats were running loose.
42:59Nothing suggesting.
42:59I'mанеagoff.
43:00There's no way.
43:01Now, B.C.
43:02There's no way.
43:03There's no way.
43:04There are no drugs normal.
43:04There's no way.
43:05There's no way.
43:06There's no way.
43:07There's always a plan.
43:07Not bad.
43:08There's no way.
43:08There's no thingy.
43:09You are rolling.
43:09No way.
43:09There's no way.
43:10There's no way.
43:11Something new.
43:11There's no way.
43:12There's no way.
43:13Not bad.
43:13Everything has been ruined.
43:14Transcription by CastingWords
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