Baylen Out Loud - Season 2 Episode 07- Did I Mention That I Have Tourette.
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00:00You just did it, four.
00:05Okay, six, we're good.
00:07Six, that was three, three and three, we're good.
00:10Your father's having a lot of influence on our lives right now.
00:16I don't think they 100% trust us.
00:20You don't think so?
00:21Whether it's the venues or what career I want to go into.
00:25Ho, ho, ho your ass out the door, bitch.
00:28I asked Baelin to have a conversation with her father.
00:33You don't want Baelin to go communicate for you every time there's a concern.
00:39How do you feel about having a conversation with Alan?
00:46Your mom and I want to celebrate your engagement.
00:48Like an engagement party?
00:50Absolutely.
00:51So where is this party going to be?
00:53Right in the backyard.
00:53This is definitely Alan's way of saying, hey, the backyard could definitely be a wedding
01:00spot for you guys.
01:03So how was your trip to Roanoke?
01:04We went and saw a wedding venue.
01:07Close to them?
01:08Yeah.
01:09Okay.
01:10Colin invited them.
01:10I wish my parents were a little bit more involved because I feel like Colin inviting his family
01:16to the wedding venue that they toured stripped them of it a little bit, of experiencing that
01:20with their daughter.
01:26Hi.
01:27Hi.
01:28Today's Van Collins engagement party.
01:31You're bald, Chuck.
01:33Just in case you weren't aware already.
01:34And it's looking pretty amazing.
01:37This is so beautiful.
01:38And if they want to have a wedding in the backyard, I would build 10 times better than this to have
01:43these guys have an amazing day.
01:45I mean, I could really picture the wedding back here.
01:48Could you?
01:49Yeah.
01:50We have to announce our wedding venue and I'm second guessing it.
01:55Where we will be having our wedding will be at...
02:01At the film.
02:04JV does crystal meth with Joe Biden.
02:16Okay, keep talking.
02:17I'm just...
02:19Where we will be having our wedding will be at...
02:24An amazing, beautiful venue on top of a mountain.
02:36And it's a place where Balin feels the most comfortable to take freely.
02:43It's beautiful.
02:44I have Tourette's Syndrome, stupid.
02:46What mountain?
02:46You all will be there.
02:47What mountain will we be on?
02:48It's close to Roanoke.
02:50Okay.
02:51Near my family.
02:52We're happy that we found the right one.
02:54We have finally decided where we're going to get married.
02:58The seclusion.
02:59Oh, this is phenomenal.
03:05This venue is a gorgeous private wedding venue on top of a flippin' mountain.
03:10We did consider the backyard today as an option.
03:15I didn't know that it could look like that.
03:16It transformed overnight.
03:19But we just couldn't deny the views.
03:22It's so opened and I feel really comfortable taking freely there.
03:27As excited as we are, I'm still a little bit worried that I might have disappointed my dad.
03:33Thank you guys for coming.
03:37Okay.
03:37Thank God.
03:40How's your dad doing?
03:41Is your dad holding it together?
03:42No, Mom.
03:42We're out of here.
03:44Hey, congratulations on finally picking one.
03:46Yep.
03:48I think they made a perfect choice for this venue because they picked one in Roanoke, closer to Colin's family, our family.
03:55Congratulations, dear.
03:58I'm not losing a son.
04:00I'm gaining a dog.
04:01And so, um, I'm just so, so blessed to have both of them in my life.
04:09I do think Al must be a little bit disappointed that they didn't choose this as their venue.
04:17And ironically, I was kind of coming around a little bit myself, especially after seeing his idea of the engagement party come to fruition.
04:27I need to know more.
04:29But definitely more questions than answers in terms of the venue announcement.
04:35Hey, Dad.
04:41What are you doing, bae?
04:42I just came to tell you that it meant a lot to me today.
04:46Everything that you did.
04:47The alpacas.
04:48Oh, my gosh.
04:48Like, I didn't expect the alpacas.
04:50Like, I mean, you put me in full-blown happiness tears.
04:53What means more to me is you set up for yourself and are brave enough to say,
05:00I made my own decision and this is what I want, right?
05:05And that you didn't worry about my feelings.
05:07You worry about your own, right?
05:09Well, I do worry about yours.
05:11Well, listen, mine are in the background.
05:15Think of it like this, okay?
05:17As a dad or as a parent, I've walked beside you and I've watched you grow into your own person.
05:33That is far more important to me than being something that I want you to be.
05:39I want you to be you.
05:41I want you to be all the things that you dream about.
05:45Don't be the things that I want you to be.
05:47You be the things for you, okay?
05:49I am very excited that you guys picked an amazing spot.
05:55Me too.
05:56And I'm looking forward to being there, okay?
05:59I'm excited to show you guys pictures because it's really beautiful.
06:03Honey, honey, you mean the world to me, okay?
06:07Enjoy the rest of your day.
06:08Stop crying, all right?
06:09Stop crying.
06:12It's a huge relief feeling my dad's reassurance.
06:16All right, let's go back and see all your buddies that traveled a long way, okay?
06:19Even though today went well, me and Colin are still trying to talk to my dad about boundaries going forward.
06:26It's an uncomfortable conversation to be had, but it's something that needs to happen for me and Colin to start building a relationship and life together.
06:33We just need to find the right time.
06:37Thank you for having us.
06:38Congrats once again.
06:40Thank you for coming.
06:42So now that we have the wedding venue out of the way, really it's pedal to the floor and we are...
06:53Pedal to the middle, bitch.
06:55...going full speed into this wedding planning.
06:58See you, Travis.
06:59Thank you for coming.
06:59We only have 11 months until our wedding and there's a lot of stuff to do in a short amount of time.
07:05We've got a lot of vendors to find out.
07:07Bye, Sunny D.
07:08So, are you ready for this?
07:11Are you ready for this?
07:14You ready for this?
07:16Are you ready for this?
07:21Yeah?
07:22Take a s*** off the ass.
07:25I'd rather not.
07:26I love you.
07:27Throw that in the lingerie room, please.
07:48Nah.
07:49And then come stand over here.
07:51I'm going to have you dry these.
07:54Maybe Burke will dry the dishes.
07:56See me!
07:57Or a party, huh?
07:59I think yesterday's party was a major success.
08:01When I went to bed, there were still things going on.
08:03Like, the bonfire is still smoldering outside.
08:07And since the party went so late, we didn't get a chance to discuss the wedding venue with Bay and Colin.
08:12But we're hoping that we get more information soon.
08:16Dad, how do you feel about the wedding not being in the backyard?
08:18I feel a little bit of relief that I don't have six months' worth of projects to work on.
08:24Like, just to do this was a lot of work.
08:26It's a big commitment.
08:27And that doesn't mean that you didn't want to do it.
08:28But now you can be like, okay, they found something that's better.
08:31I mean, we still need to, like, look more into it or whatever.
08:34And she sent me the link to the venue.
08:37Do you want to see it?
08:38Oh, so she gave you the name.
08:40I was waiting for the text.
08:42I was like, are we going to get a name to this place?
08:44Mountain Top.
08:45Mountain Top Venues.
08:46I'm not scared to listen.
08:48Okay.
08:49To me, time frame.
08:50That would give me an idea, like, what month.
08:52Or to be picked a day.
08:54Let's kind of start at that.
08:57We know nothing about budget.
08:58We know nothing if this is a five-course meal or if this is a buffet.
09:01We don't know if we're inviting the great aunts or if we're cutting the line at brothers and sisters.
09:06We really know nothing.
09:11My God.
09:12This is, like, where she'd, like, get ready and hang out afterwards.
09:16Is this where the ceremony happens?
09:18Yeah, it has to be.
09:18Is this the ceremony?
09:20Wait, is this where Colin would ride in on the stallion?
09:24Okay.
09:24Same thing.
09:25I'm going to bet you that price tag right there is gigantic.
09:29I'm kind of taken aback, like, wow.
09:32Oh, my gosh, that's nice.
09:34It's pivotal in their pending marriage that they learn how to budget and save money now.
09:41The venue is stunning, but I'm thinking cha-ching.
09:46Yeah.
09:47So now that the venue's finally been revealed, and obviously you and Balen have already talked about, like, you being maid of honor and whatever.
09:55How much do you feel like you can do being there?
09:58I can't just drive down the road and see you, you know?
10:00So it's kind of like I feel bad that I can't be here sometimes.
10:03I don't want to miss dress shopping with Bae, and I don't want to miss picking her veil out and a pair of shoes, and I don't want to miss that.
10:11So it's like I would never want to miss Balen's pivotal moments in her life.
10:17Never.
10:17But with my schedule and anxiety and OCD and traveling and coming back here and unpacking and doing all the things and then going back and getting back into my real life, I don't know.
10:29It's 500 things.
10:30Like, I just can't shut my mind off.
10:33You shouldn't have to miss it.
10:34Yeah, I wouldn't have to miss that.
10:35As far as I'm concerned, that's not an option.
10:37You missing it is not an option.
10:38But the reality is that this is really difficult for you.
10:43I'm super thankful that Sammy was able to make it here for the engagement party, although I feel like it's going to be a minute before we see her again, even though she wants to be here.
10:56She's a little bit into kind of like a dark place with some of her anxious thoughts and OCD, and I think that she really needs to work on herself right now.
11:09Maybe for a little while, the ends won't justify the means.
11:14Seeing the venue, though, made me excited because I at least have a blueprint for sakes.
11:19Oh, my gosh.
11:20I know.
11:21We're all just grateful to hear a location and a place.
11:26I don't want to overwhelm Balin.
11:29I do know how quickly Balin can get overstressed and overwhelmed and all the overs, and that can lead down a slippery slope of not good.
11:40But the clock is ticking.
11:42It's really time that we start to talk through a few things, wetting, so that we can get a jump on some stuff.
11:49We're in therapy right now discussing Dad.
11:58Oh, gosh.
11:59Colin really wants a relationship with Dad, and he's scared.
12:02I know they have the best intentions for us.
12:09However, I'm going to make whatever decision I'm going to make, and I don't care what anybody else has to say.
12:15The engagement party at my parents' house yesterday was genuinely so incredible.
12:43The opaca surprise, Sammy and all my friends making it,
12:47the excitement I got from my dad with our wedding venue.
12:51However, yesterday's high has been tanked
12:54after reading some comments on social media.
12:57I got a couple, and what I mean by a couple, a lot of couple,
13:01of not nice comments towards my body.
13:07Social media is hard, especially when you're reading comments
13:10and those type of things, and it's like,
13:11oh my God, I had no idea you're pregnant, congratulations.
13:15What? I'm sorry, there was never an announcement.
13:19That's not happening.
13:22Hey, what are you doing?
13:24Laundry.
13:25Yeah, fun times.
13:29Loved these shorts, but it just won't fit,
13:32and neither will those.
13:35What's going on?
13:37Nothing fits.
13:38My jeans don't fit.
13:40My jean shorts don't fit.
13:42Is it from the new medication you've been trying out?
13:45Is weight gain one of the side effects?
13:48Yep.
13:49The number one side effect.
13:51On top of, like, being, like, scared to go to the gym
13:54because of my germs.
13:55I've gained 18 pounds that I cannot lose.
14:01It's definitely frustrating because I really do like this medication.
14:06Just throw them away.
14:07I'm never going to fit in them.
14:09This medication is intended to treat my mood.
14:12I feel better.
14:14I sleep better.
14:16But at the end of the day, with the weight gain,
14:18it's definitely affecting my self-confidence.
14:20Do I keep these?
14:22Yes.
14:23So how do you think yesterday was with the whole engagement party and everything?
14:27I think it went lovely.
14:29I'm just really excited that your parents were there.
14:31Speaking of my parents, my mom told me that my dad had about four or five glasses of the spiked lemonade.
14:40That's hilarious because he probably hasn't had that amount of alcohol.
14:46In his life?
14:47Since he was probably 18.
14:49Them explosions!
14:53So, yeah, he had no idea.
14:55He didn't feel anything or anything.
14:59What comes next?
15:00Like, which steps in wedding planning?
15:03Save the dates, RSVPs.
15:06When do we pick out the cake?
15:07I don't know.
15:09I am very stressed between wedding planning, budgeting, and pretty much everything that comes with it.
15:19And with that, makes my OCD worse.
15:22I'm seeing my mom later, so it's probably a good time to gauge her thoughts.
15:26Because I'm already overwhelmed.
15:30I really want to get in shape before the wedding.
15:33And I know that I want to get in shape before the wedding as well.
15:36Why don't we find an avenue or way that we can work out together?
15:43I know, without you touching gym equipment.
15:46You suck.
15:46If you do some research and find a class that you want to do, I'll do it with you.
15:51Okay.
15:54And that's a scary statement, because I don't know what the hell you're going to find.
16:00I have a great idea for a workout we can do together.
16:03Yeah, that means it's probably going to be something like Pilates or...
16:06Something more exciting.
16:08I'm sure.
16:09Dick.
16:09I don't know if I want to get Punky a black tux.
16:31No, we got to get him pink.
16:33Oh, my God.
16:36Hi.
16:37Thanks for inviting me to shop with you.
16:40Look at the sock burglar.
16:41Okay, what are we doing?
16:42I'm shopping for Tootie, Punky, and Falaf.
16:45I'm definitely craving a little bit more involvement in the wedding planning preparations.
16:50And this is not exactly what I had in mind.
16:56We're getting a lot of dog clothes.
16:57No, you're on a budget.
16:58You're getting married, so you're on a budget.
17:02Do they have shopping carts?
17:03Oh, yes, of course.
17:05Do you not have a wedding budget?
17:07I have a toy list.
17:10Bailen.
17:11Okay, do I put the llamas back?
17:12You're worrying me.
17:14I know you want the most expensive wedding in the whole world, and we're filling our shirt with dog toys.
17:19Falaf's going to love that.
17:20What do you think I need to do?
17:22Mom, I don't know.
17:23I don't know either.
17:24I'm this way.
17:25I don't come shop.
17:25What about a wedding coordinator?
17:26I know it's like an extra cost for a wedding coordinator, but somebody that knows what they're doing.
17:32What are you doing?
17:33This truly is not the best place to discuss the wedding.
17:37Nothing wedding is going to be accomplished here today.
17:40I think either one, she's completely clueless, or two, she would just rather not think about it.
17:49Oh, my God, they spin!
17:51What do you think the reality is of Sammy coming back to helping me plan my wedding in person?
17:57Oh, it's not happening anytime soon.
17:59No, she's not in a good spot with traveling.
18:03Because her anxiety is a little bit at a peak.
18:05And I don't want to stress her out.
18:07I think what's important is for you to decide.
18:11Marlene Dooley, them explosions.
18:15How you want to utilize people.
18:17Like sending out and making Save the Dates.
18:20There's so much.
18:21Like, I know that that's next, and I know that I'm going to need help writing down everyone's addresses.
18:25Yes, I can help you with that.
18:28But you can't do Save the Dates until you have a guest list.
18:31Until the guest list is 100% final?
18:33But we're picking out dog dresses.
18:35You need to have the numbers.
18:36We'll back away.
18:37You need to have, like, the numbers situated.
18:41It's super, super important that I have my mom help me with all the ins and outs of wedding planning,
18:47because it can get stressful and overwhelming, and those type of things make my tics worse.
18:52I could see fluffing on on this for, like, six years.
18:56I didn't put that back.
18:57What the, is this a leg?
18:59So, to be able to have her time means the world to me.
19:03Can you just start with one?
19:06No.
19:07So, what's the latest with couples counseling?
19:10What?
19:11Nothing.
19:11Wait, bad?
19:13Nothing, what's going on?
19:14We're just having some conversations.
19:17I'm feeling, are you acting weird?
19:20Um.
19:22I'm reluctant to tell my mom that dad's been brought up in therapy,
19:26because I just don't know what she's going to say, or what she's going to think.
19:31Are you acting weird?
19:34Because we're in therapy right now discussing dad.
19:37Oh, gosh.
19:38Mm-hmm.
19:38Why are you discussing dad?
19:39We're working on coming up with a way to bring up to dad that me and Colin kind of want to, like, take things our own way, if that makes any sense.
19:56No, it doesn't help, help your mom out.
20:03I've been putting off talking to my parents because things were so good at the engagement party.
20:09But I know it's better to rip that Band-Aid off now, hmm, and tell my mom first to see what she thinks.
20:15I just hope I'm not making things worse for Colin by sharing this with my mom.
20:27Me and Colin kind of want to, like, take things our own way, if that makes any sense.
20:34No, it doesn't help, help your mom out.
20:39We had initially presented the idea of premarital counseling to Bay and Colin to work on their relationship.
20:46So it has been a little bit surprising to find out that they have been talking about Colin and Alan's relationship.
20:54Colin really wants a relationship with dad, like that bond and that relationship with him.
21:00And he's scared.
21:01He's scared after the initial, I mean, who wouldn't be?
21:07I do feel kind of bad that Colin still feels that way.
21:11And I don't want him to, and your dad does not want him to feel any kind of way.
21:15Do you think that we should even bring it up?
21:18Honestly.
21:19I don't know that it necessarily has to be my dad, dad, dad.
21:24I think it needs to be boundaries in general.
21:26And I think that we want to do everything that we can do to make him feel comfortable.
21:32You and Colin come to the house.
21:35Barbecue.
21:36Vanania!
21:37It'll just be one more step of showing him.
21:39You're done.
21:40You know?
21:41Like, okay, I don't want to get hurt.
21:43I don't think my dad's overstepping by chiming in.
21:45He just wants what's best for his kids and wants to make sure that we're all taken care of.
21:52However, I love Colin, and I want to support Colin, and I understand where he's coming from with my dad.
22:00Thanks for taking those from me.
22:02Do you want me to take this?
22:03No.
22:04Your dad can have a lighthearted conversation and be like, Colin, like, we're good.
22:10You're loved.
22:11Knowing the ways that Colin and my dad have clashed before, I would just like it to be less intense and have to just two people having a conversation.
22:24But I have no idea how the conversation is going to go.
22:27This is making me really anxious to think about.
22:29Are we ready to go shopping?
22:34Okay, where do we go?
22:37Happy hell in that day.
22:39Yeehaw.
22:52Okay, this is it.
22:54Turn left.
22:56Okay.
22:57We're here.
22:58Where are we?
23:00You're sure just going to have to find out when we get inside, sweetheart.
23:06I have no idea where Baylen's taking me today.
23:09Dickville.
23:10It's supposed to...
23:12It's supposed...
23:12Colin.
23:17Dickville.
23:18Okay.
23:18Your mom goes to Dickville.
23:19I'm sorry, Marlene.
23:22Baylen and I both want to get in better shape for the wedding.
23:24This is supposed to be a workout class, but knowing her, it's not something like pole dancing or something, right?
23:31I'm not pole dancing, so absolutely not.
23:38I just saw a sign that said yoga.
23:39Please, no.
23:42Don't worry.
23:43It's a sport you've already done, and I'm sure you're really good at it.
23:46Somehow, that doesn't make me feel any better at all.
23:51Ride the horse.
23:53Like, dude, we're already late.
23:55Let's go.
23:56Ride the horse.
23:57What the f*** is this?
24:03Ride the horse.
24:08Okay, everyone, so we're going to start with a warm-up, get our body loose.
24:11We're riding horse heads on a stick.
24:14How is this a workout?
24:16Oh, it's a legit sport.
24:17It's a sport.
24:18I don't...
24:19Saw it on social media.
24:21There is a U.S. championship for this f***.
24:24Think about it.
24:24Horseback riding is like the same thing, but we are the horse.
24:27So instead of the horse jumping over the barrels, we are jumping over the barrels.
24:31So technically, it's a great exercise for us instead of horsies.
24:36Yeah.
24:37What horse do you want?
24:38What horse do you want?
24:40You pick.
24:43How you doing?
24:43My name's Greg.
24:44Nice to meet you all.
24:44Nice to meet you.
24:45Nice to meet you.
24:45Ride the horse.
24:46Nice to meet you.
24:47Going to a hobby horse class is different than going to the gym with my OCD,
24:51because when I go to the gym, I have a specific fear of germs,
24:55put germs on the equipment, germs not being wiped down.
24:58We all have our own horse.
25:00So compared going to the gym, it's one thing you're touching versus 20 things you're touching.
25:06What exactly is this?
25:08So, you know, we're doing fitness a long time.
25:10We're going to have a cardio workout, but it's inspired by the hobby horse.
25:14So...
25:14I learned about Colin riding a hobby horse around his house naked.
25:20Actually, from his mom, she showed me a photo.
25:24I just did it butt-ass naked before every shower.
25:28I just thought you would like it and it would bring back memories.
25:33Everybody, if we can line up in rows, please.
25:35You get in the middle.
25:36Okay, I'm getting in the middle.
25:39Ride the horse.
25:40Today, we're going to have a fitness class inspired by hobby horses.
25:44We're going to go over some movements.
25:46The walk, the trot.
25:48Dick.
25:49Moo, bitch.
25:51As we raise our knee up, our toes are pointed downward.
25:54Woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo-hoo.
25:55Keep going a couple more times.
25:56Eat a bag of dicks.
25:57I'm watching.
25:58Did I mention I have Tourette's, anybody?
26:01I feel really comfortable in the hobby horse class.
26:08It's just really nice to be able to tick and not be judged or looked at or stared at or talked about.
26:14I mean, we're all standing here holding horse heads,
26:16so I feel like these people are willing to go with anything.
26:20Right here.
26:20Boom.
26:21Toes pointed downward.
26:23Try to look up right.
26:25Don't look at the horse.
26:26This horse.
26:28Yeah.
26:29Keep going.
26:30Six, five, four.
26:30What's the horse?
26:31Four, three.
26:32Yeah, it's pretty humiliating to be in the front row with a stick between your legs and a horse on the other end.
26:38Woo!
26:42Yeehaw.
26:42All right, next, we're going to go from a canter to a flying change, similar to a skip.
26:48Got it.
26:50Yeah.
26:51Ride the horse.
26:54I was taking it serious.
26:55It's called a workout class.
26:57It's called you work out in the workout class.
26:59I was worked out.
27:01How many laps are you doing?
27:02I'm having flashbacks.
27:03We're going to gallop.
27:09Jump.
27:10Jump.
27:11Jump.
27:14Ooh.
27:15Grace, look at that.
27:20Oh, I don't know.
27:21Sweet.
27:23All right, everyone, that is class.
27:25Let me collect the horses.
27:28Back in the stalls.
27:29They've got to be boarded.
27:30I don't think that going to hobby horse classes on a consistent basis is going to help you lose weight.
27:39I guarantee you, I probably burned less than 100 calories in that class.
27:43Did everyone have fun?
27:44Yeah.
27:45Woo!
27:47Let me catch my breath for a second.
27:49So what'd you think?
27:52Ride the horse.
27:53Yeah, I mean...
27:55It was something that I'll never forget, I can tell you that.
27:58Uh-huh.
28:00I would probably not take this class again, just because there's a lot of running all past.
28:09But it's fine.
28:09I'll think long and hard next time before we pick another sport.
28:13Go rat, take...
28:14So, speaking of things that we don't want to do, we still need to have that conversation
28:21with your father.
28:22So, are we still going to have that conversation, or no?
28:27I don't know.
28:30I have a feeling it's not going to end well.
28:34But my mom has asked me how couples therapy is going, and I told her that dad has come
28:43up.
28:43How did that conversation go?
28:46Just about as well as I thought it would be.
28:48I mean, I think it's okay to discuss something about what happens in couples counseling.
28:56But when it's something like this that we've kind of went back and forth on, and it's kind
29:03of a big deal, and it involves her parents.
29:06I just wish she would have, like, brought it up to me first or something.
29:11I know they have the best intentions for us.
29:15However...
29:17You just don't want to hear you should do this job.
29:20I'm just saying it's hard to hear from somebody.
29:23That you should do the same thing over and over again?
29:26No, that I, like, if I get a job offer that doesn't have health care, don't take it, even
29:32if that's something that I want to do.
29:33So that's hard to hear as the person that is now trying to take over the reins from him.
29:39And I don't care who it upsets.
29:41I'm going to do what's best for me and what I think is best for the both of us.
29:45That's it.
29:47I'm headed into a completely different career path for me outside of the military.
29:52And I wish I had, like, their trust more and to be able to make these types of decisions.
30:00So I think that it's important that we all sit down and have a conversation together
30:07just so we can talk through this at their house.
30:12Okay.
30:13I mean, I'm fine with having a low-key conversation.
30:18All right?
30:19But I'm going to make whatever decision I'm going to make, and I don't care what anybody
30:23else has to say.
30:24They've got to figure out finance, budget, and I think that we need to, like, confront
30:31that head-on.
30:32And I know that he still has some feelings about yours and his relationship.
30:38I'm not surprised that I've come up in their therapy sessions, but I am curious to know why.
30:43You're almost done?
30:58Oh, you're done.
30:59Yeah, it looks good.
31:00Oh, good stuff.
31:01They should be here any moment, I think.
31:03Did you just talk to her?
31:04Did you get a text?
31:05Yeah, they're on their way.
31:06Yeah.
31:06She was like, who's all going to be there?
31:08And I was like, oh, just your dad and I, because the boys are golfing and Beck's at a
31:12sleepover.
31:14Holla.
31:15Bailen and Colin are coming over tonight to talk about the wedding planning and also
31:19some things that have come up in therapy.
31:22It's kind of actually nice that the boys aren't here, because, like, you can talk.
31:25We can talk.
31:26I mean, I know, obviously, the intention is to talk about wedding stuff a lot, because
31:32we've got to start this.
31:34I mean, this is pathetic.
31:34They've got to figure out finance, budget, like, I don't even know.
31:40There's just a lot, so I'm excited.
31:41You really think there's a budget?
31:42Well, I think that's the point, to ask some questions and find out.
31:45You've already said words that probably they've never heard before.
31:48Plan, budget.
31:51Talking with Bailen at the pet shop made me realize that she definitely is in a little
31:59bit over her head with this wedding planning.
32:01We know that they decided on a venue, and therefore they picked a date, which is next
32:07year, and that is only 11 months away.
32:09That's not a lot of time.
32:11They are going to need a little more help planning this event.
32:15Somebody like maybe myself.
32:17But help cost money, too.
32:18Yeah, that's true.
32:19So there, add that to the list.
32:22Mm-hmm.
32:23I'm excited.
32:25Yeah, me too.
32:25But I'm nervous, too, because it's like, let's not be unrealistic.
32:28Like, let's really, like, buckle down with all this and make sure that you're in the right
32:33realm with everything.
32:35If maybe you're not, now's a good time to pivot.
32:37You know, and be like, okay, well, maybe that won't work.
32:41Thank you for bringing that up, kind of a thing.
32:43Yeah.
32:44And I know that they've even had some things brought up, you know, since they started
32:51the premarital counseling.
32:55So I know they even have some stuff, like, if we even make it to that topic.
33:00I know that he still has some feelings about yours and his relationship and whatever.
33:07And I think that we need to, like, confront that head on.
33:10I hadn't told Alan until now that he had came up in their therapy session because I
33:19don't want his feelings to be prematurely hurt when maybe it's not as big of a deal as
33:26it would come across as being.
33:30It's kind of unsettling, but I'm not surprised that I've come up in their therapy sessions,
33:36but I am curious to know why.
33:38Nobody's here.
33:41Like, we can have a private conversation because the kids are not around.
33:44Whatever they want to talk about, I'm willing to talk about.
33:45Okay.
33:50Are you nervous at all to go, like, to my parents?
33:53This is a conversation that's needed to have been had for a long time.
34:01We've needed to have this conversation.
34:03I think it's really important for there to be boundaries.
34:10We're about to get married, and you don't want to wait and put it off.
34:16And the next thing you know, we have kids, and it gets to a point where it's too late to
34:23be able to set those boundaries.
34:24I'm going to just say that there's been a decision that's been made regarding my career
34:33choice, and I want to go into real estate.
34:37So let's be honest here.
34:39Let's be honest, bitch.
34:40I'm choosing a career field that your dad told me not to choose.
34:44When we take that chance, we just want you guys to be with us.
34:50I wouldn't even call it a chance.
34:52What would you call it?
34:54I would just call it a career, a decision.
34:58It's not a chance.
35:00When you go into something with that kind of a mindset, you're going to fail every single
35:03time.
35:04So how do you go into it?
35:07Saying that you're not going to fail.
35:11So what happens if you fail?
35:12Well, it's not a chance.
35:16I don't know.
35:19We're taking a chance.
35:21Exactly.
35:22We can fail at this conversation.
35:25I know we can.
35:30It's really important to me that Colin feels heard and seen and understood.
35:34It just feels like an impossible balance to deal with right now, though, between him and
35:39my parents.
35:39It feels very overwhelming to always be in the middle.
35:42You got what you're going to say figured out?
35:45Sure.
35:46All right.
35:48Here we go.
35:48We're finally here.
35:51My God.
35:52Are they bringing their dogs?
36:02I have no idea.
36:04Hi, guys.
36:05Hi.
36:07It is quiet here.
36:08Where's Toot?
36:10We didn't bring them because we have to go all the way back.
36:12No, doggies.
36:15Where?
36:15I'm not trying to say your dad loves Toot more than he loves you, but your dad loves
36:19toot.
36:19No, I was just wondering maybe I could go around like a teenager.
36:23I made her a hamburger.
36:27Alan and I don't always see eye to eye.
36:30We have different approaches, different opinions on things.
36:34Every decision that I make, it's, hey, you shouldn't do that, or hey, that's risky, or hey, like
36:39this.
36:40Ultimately, at the end of the day, like, I'm going to make whatever decision that I think
36:46is best for my life, regardless of what anybody else has to say about it.
36:49So, I'm glad you came, because we, all four of us, haven't had the opportunity to talk
36:57more about the wedding-ish plans.
37:00Mm, this is so good.
37:02What are some of the things that you guys have discussed?
37:05Or do you, like, I mean, do you have, like, notepads?
37:07Discussed for what?
37:08For the wedding.
37:09Yeah.
37:10You're bald.
37:13The only thing that we have, we need to, like, 100% finish before the save the dates,
37:18which would be, like, our next steps, is the guest list.
37:21Because we've nailed in the coffin at least 120 people.
37:25120 people.
37:26That's a bad term to use.
37:30We nailed in the coffin, yeah.
37:32Nailed 120 people in the coffin.
37:34Coffin.
37:34Yeah.
37:35Deck.
37:36Do you have a budget?
37:37Have you looked at each other and said, hey, this is the amount of money that we want
37:42to spend, and how can we find a way to stay within that budget?
37:46Whatever it is, double it, and then double that.
37:49That's probably what it'll be.
37:51I'm not surprised at all that my parents are hitting us with a bunch of wedding questions.
37:55We're still in the dark about a lot of this, so they're great questions, but we have no
38:01idea how to answer them.
38:04We have sat down and talked about how much we want to put in.
38:07Okay.
38:07We haven't sat down and thought about how much we want to individually spend on, like,
38:11florists and makeup and hair.
38:12Because I've thought about getting one of my friends to do my makeup.
38:15Like, if it comes down to getting my makeup done and getting all my bridesmaids done
38:19is $15,000.
38:20I'm not going to pay for that when all of us can do our...
38:23By all means, we'll get their bride...
38:24$15,000?
38:25What is this?
38:26Reconstructive surgery?
38:27Well, that would be your part that you would pay.
38:30How the f*** is somebody going to make up and such it?
38:33That would be the part you guys pay.
38:36And then the horse for Colin would come out of your loan.
38:38Oh, f***.
38:41I feel like we're kind of, like, working, like, backwards.
38:44Like, we're figuring out all, like, the small stuff.
38:47Okay.
38:47And we don't have any of, like, the major stuff to do.
38:49You need a wedding planner.
38:49Like, the guest list or...
38:50We probably do.
38:52We've been discussing on whether we should get a wedding planner or not.
38:54Oh.
38:55And we were kind of waiting on that.
38:56I think after tonight, you probably should be on a yes checkbox.
38:59I mean, I'm even clueless.
39:00Okay.
39:01Because I'm feeling the stress for you guys.
39:04I'm not feeling no stress yet.
39:06If you just don't think about it.
39:08If you just don't think about it.
39:10I love that technique.
39:11Yeah, I'm learning in therapy.
39:12It's called procrastinating.
39:14It's called avoiding.
39:15No, no, no.
39:16It doesn't go away.
39:17It's not procrastinating.
39:17It's called avoidance.
39:18It's something I'm very f***ing good at.
39:21You are.
39:22Yup.
39:23Yeah.
39:23Yup.
39:25Oh, my gosh.
39:26Speaking of therapy.
39:27Speaking of therapy.
39:29Hold your dad.
39:31A little bit of what you said to me in the...
39:33Yeah, where am I at in therapy?
39:39I don't want to tell my dad that my dad's been brought up in therapy.
39:42I'm honestly freaking out because I have no idea what my parents are going to think when
39:50we finally put our feet down about boundaries, especially with Colin's career.
39:55I'm worried that this might go really, really bad.
39:59What's the deal?
40:00What am I doing?
40:01What am I doing?
40:04Uh, so...
40:06In therapy, we were talking about stressors and knowing that, like, whatever decision that
40:15I make is not only affecting me, but her.
40:18It's a long road to that dead end.
40:21This is why I hate confrontation,
40:23because it feels like there's so much to lose.
40:26If this doesn't work out, what are you going to do?
40:32Hi!
40:34How are you?
40:34We're really hoping that the wedding planner
40:36can help us with, one, everything.
40:39I want alpacas.
40:40Alpacas.
40:41A horse.
40:43Have you guys ever done a queso fountain?
40:45A queso fountain.
40:47Part of our job is educating them
40:50so that we can be like,
40:51okay, this is what reality is.
40:54In thinking about your budget,
40:56you're not going to love what I have to tell you.
41:02He always done a swim!
41:04If I'm going to want a horse in our wedding,
41:07do you want to work on your fear of horses?
41:11Do the exposure therapy today with the horses.
41:15I want to cry.
41:17It's okay.
41:17They can throw you off.
41:19They can kick you.
41:20Just everything about them is scary to me.
41:23Just everything about them is scary to me.
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