00:00five reasons i hate you replay edition no that's just kidding raiders edition five reasons i hate
00:05you let's do this all right let's start right off the top here it's the one we've teased all week
00:11and i think i'll thank figgy fig for this one because last week when we were doing five reasons
00:16i hate you for the cardinals i accidentally said rich gannon when i meant jonathan gannon and figgy
00:21texted me and said hey you can do rich gannon next week he's a raider legend yeah he's also a former
00:26cbs analyst rich gannon sass new bff when i'm a new bff i've liked him since i was a player
00:35i love how you're contesting me not on the bff part but on the new part he was uh he uh he was doing
00:41a game when i was still playing in the league and he knew who i was i was always uh because i had
00:46played against him and everything and i always uh i just i formed a rapport with him when we did the
00:51production meeting this is why i hate rich gannon yeah um 2020 week six yeah texans titans texans
00:59take the lead that was the covid year texans take the lead in that game 36 to 29 on a deshaun watson
01:06to brandon cook's fourth and goal touchdown yes i'm watching this i'm like god they're having all
01:10the same problems in goal to go that this texans team had they're running they're running right up
01:15into the line they convert on fourth down they take a 36 to 29 lead if you kick the extra point
01:20you're up eight yeah romeo crinnell there's like a minute 50 to go in the game romeo crinnell chooses
01:24to go for two because you win the game there yeah you go up nine the game is a game a high scoring game
01:29you go for not boom and they don't convert rich gannon thinks it's the dumbest thing he's ever seen
01:37because he's got this stupid card in his pocket everybody has these things it says right here
01:42when to go for two right and you look at it it says you go for two or when you kick the extra
01:47point and if you're up by seven every coach in the national football league greg has one of these
01:51in their back pocket the guy up in the booth that spots for the the play caller and the head coach
01:56and they have them i just don't understand everyone's talking about this new wave of analytics and hiring
02:01all these experts and these computer guys i just think you make a big mistake you're on the roads a
02:06divisional game you score a touchdown kick the extra point and make it eight and you'd be feeling the
02:11same way even if the conversion attempt was good absolutely we'll see about that i think uh i don't
02:18know yeah and the thing about that is i feel like sometimes analytics gets introduced under those
02:23discussions um about whether to go for two or not in certain situations where there's common sense
02:29arguments on either side of it for we don't have to bring in we don't have to drag analytics into it
02:33i think with gannon it was more a matter of like hey they obviously they have a different chart you
02:38know it's not like they're i well i think gannon believing that there's one standard chart and
02:43that's what the it's the exact same for everybody else um is uh no there's room for there's room for
02:49different charts they would not have gone for two if there was anything more than two minutes left
02:54and they they wouldn't have gone for the texans wouldn't have gone for two in the third quarter
02:58after scoring they're trying to win the game yeah there's difference it's trying to win the game
03:02because a lot of coaches feel like and again old school more so than if i can win the game right now
03:07right now i'm gonna make it a two possession game by going up nine that for in the eyes of a lot of
03:14people is not applicable in that instance in the last two minutes of the game that's why he sounds
03:18stupid to me in there and that's why i hate him for purposes of this segment and by the way by the way
03:22if they kick if they kick the extra point if they can't sorry i know he's your friend they if they
03:27kick the extra point and they go up eight yeah this is a game as you pointed out it's being played
03:31in the 30s and derrick henry's on the other side yeah they're getting the two derrick henry who uh
03:36they're getting the two what year was this 2020 that was before he had established his freakish streak
03:42no it was it it was during he established it in 2019 he started killing when it started okay
03:48yeah yeah you know what all you had to do is mention derrick henry right and uh yep gannon
03:52that was the right decision yeah yeah you took over two yeah stupid here is a difference of opinion
03:57in this segment he was being stupid he's not stupid he was being stupid right there uh reason
04:03number four five reasons i hate the raiders mark davis cuts his hair with a spoon and a fishbowl
04:08puts a fishbowl on his head or uh some sort of you know pasta bowl and then takes a spoon
04:14and takes two hours he's like give me the dunce cap yeah that's what i want yeah yeah give me the
04:20that is a cuisine art he might be a good owner i have no idea i mean his his franchise stinks
04:24and they've they've not been good in a long long time but just if you change the haircut around i
04:29think people would lay off has he ever done what was the last he's he's done a pretty good job of
04:34avoiding really bad comments though right for a guy that looks like and you know if he'd been born
04:41into uh any other family uh if he'd been adopted or something because he was one of l's you know
04:47you know just made a little mistake here um rising above anything other than uh what maybe
04:56fired bus driver or something yeah yeah haircut i couldn't see him holding a job no that's a great
05:02point yeah yeah he um he does surround himself with attractive women quite a bit which i think
05:07throws people off he must be charming yeah he must be yeah he must have that gift of yeah every
05:12press conference i've seen i'm like that guy's really charming yeah at haircut number three
05:16raider legend john gruden i'll give you another reason apparently he pays a boatload of money for
05:21that haircut does he really yes he flies this he flies somebody in for it you're kidding i do not i
05:27am not kidding i would not kid about mark david i trust you i trust you uh number three five
05:33reasons i hate you raider legend john gruden will not return my texts yeah what the hell
05:38what the he probably you know what probably got something against irish people you know he's kind
05:45of wired that way probably so yeah yeah yeah yeah racist um that's not what got him in trouble
05:52with the emails and everything that was something else but there was both oh it was both uh homophobic
05:57and racial at least what they perceived as racial there's arguments gotcha i didn't know he checked
06:01both boxes okay um so yeah raider legend john gruden who i met in a very impromptu situation at a
06:09po'boy restaurant in new orleans and he promised he'd call you he told he he bought i didn't ask for
06:15his number i told him you and i like playing some of his audio on our show because we find him to be
06:19entertaining and informative and he said well why don't i uh why don't i come on the show and just
06:24talk to you guys in person i you don't have to play the audio anymore and i said that would be great
06:29he said here's i never asked stop being such a tease john gruden all right five reasons i hate
06:37you he's number three reason number two you know who's on the raiders life of lotto
06:43lonnie johnson jr is a las vegas raider all right yeah lonnie johnson jr one of two failed
06:52second round picks of the houston texans back in 2019 can you name the other one they were picked in
06:58back-to-back picks in the second round that was titus howard in the first round and then they
07:03took an offensive lineman and lonnie johnson in the second who's the other who's the other max
07:07oh sharp sharpening yeah max sharpening so yeah that's uh i feel bad i wish my max sharpening would
07:13have made it uh lonnie johnson would have made it yeah well lonnie lonnie was a guy that um he just
07:19couldn't he couldn't figure things out uh and uh and but he had a he had that web series that didn't
07:26make him look any better life of lotto life of lotto in which one episode was 15 minutes of him
07:31arguing with his personal trainer about why he was showing up the wrong day yeah yeah he had showed up
07:38at the wrong time and like losing the argument uh basically the trainer's showing him like no here's
07:43you texting me saying that uh that you understood what time you were supposed to be here and there
07:48was like no production value to it at all it was basically just someone walking around the
07:51camcorder following lonnie johnson around the whole time um yeah mark davis he's had like three
07:57barbers since he got out of college he said and there was one instance in which he needed a haircut
08:02so he traveled 500 miles to get to his barber that he's being asked about it goes to show you how
08:07ridiculous his haircut is i can't believe that any of his barbers would i mean if that's a i mean
08:13he's given they're giving him exactly what he wants he's probably their highest paying and highest
08:19tipping customer i would imagine yeah um all right number number one lonnie johnson number two number
08:25one the raider staff is as nepo baby as nepo gets you know p carroll brought his two sons with him
08:32to the raiders to coach on the offensive side of the football the side but both sides are really failing
08:38if we're being honest but the offensive side is the side where chip kelly got fired his son brennan is
08:43the run game coordinator and o-line coach and his son nate is the assistant qb coach and in charge of
08:50game management oh that sounds made up yeah that sounds like the the role that they gave tony khan
08:56with jackson bill like hey you're in charge of undrafted free agents yeah game management is part of his
09:03title the the deuce gruden one is one of the most interesting ones because he just looks like uh a tiny
09:09he looks roided up i'm sure it's all natural but he's that big yeah he's um but he's very very
09:15he's not tall at all no but he's massive like you would not mess with him he's their strength you
09:20would not make a short joke in front of him or anything no he's massive but it's weird because
09:25he looks enough like gruden that you're like i think gruden's on the sauce yeah is that john
09:29gruden that's right no it's his ridiculously large son nepo babies on the offensive staff
09:35and in the strength room i don't know the whole thing about deuce gruden is like
09:39this guy knows lifting weights i'll tell you that much nepo baby oh yeah of reason number three
09:46yeah it's reasons they hate him five reasons i hate you yeah that's right all right that was
09:52fine i don't think deuce gruden's even that much shorter than his dad it's just that he's so wide
09:57he's yoked that he looks shorter yeah he's wide he's as wide as he is tall he's a barrel and it's
10:01all muscle yeah all right that was five reasons i hate you uh raiders edition
Comments