- 2 days ago
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🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Obviously, to say the show-off didn't go as planned would be an understatement.
00:09But what else can you say when you see a poor girl laying there with her foot on backwards?
00:18Devastating. Not just for Crystal and Courtney and Hiddletooth, but for the entire cheer immunity.
00:24Why are you smiling? Am I? I must have something funny bang around the back of my head. Let's start again.
00:32Hang on. My heart goes out to Courtney and her entire team. I feel that smile now!
00:40As soon as I saw that poor girl's foot blow up and heard the doctor vomit, I knew it wasn't good.
00:44Unfortunately, it took the ambulance about 26 minutes to arrive, and in an emergency, every second counts.
00:50When I suffered my head injury...
00:52We lost about 18 minutes of precious time.
01:03Doctors say that's maybe the reason I still can't say the word.
01:09Catastrophic.
01:11That's the word I was thinking of.
01:13Let's go. Okay. Let's go. Let's go.
01:16Five, six, seven, eight.
01:18Had we made it to cheer camp with ten cheerleaders, we would have gotten the automatic bid to Daytona.
01:23But instead, we did what we call in cheer,
01:25the mat at our show-off.
01:28So now we gotta qualify the old-fashioned way.
01:31By going through the entire cheer season and mastering the necessary skills.
01:35But we can, we will, we must.
01:37I am gonna draw some flames on this poop, though, so we remember what happened on that day.
01:43All right. Everybody gather round. We all here except Crystal?
01:47I don't see Sally, anyway.
01:49Oh, she's not coming. She fell into the sour apple vat at her job at the candy button factory.
01:53So she called in Green.
01:55Wow. Okay. We'll see her back after her quarantine ends.
02:00And I know we're all devastated about what happened to Crystal,
02:02but we have got to put that behind us.
02:04The good news is we're gonna replace Crystal,
02:06and we're gonna recruit even better cheerleaders.
02:08Yeah, we will.
02:10How are we gonna do that?
02:11We're gonna perform at Media Day.
02:14That's when teams from all the other schools in the conference get together
02:17to promote their programs in front of local media.
02:20It is an opportunity to show off my team and recruit more cheerleaders.
02:24And this year, Hayatleston is hosting the four schools that make up the conference.
02:28Matarday St. Bernard, East South Oklahoma Junior College,
02:31Totborough City State, and of course, Hedlestown.
02:34And together, we are known as the Meth Conference.
02:38And I believe that most of the meth heads will be coming here later this week.
02:43Wait, we're performing so soon, there's still pieces of Crystal's ankle on the mat?
02:46Honey, what happened to Crystal happens all the time in cheer?
02:49That happens all the time?
02:50Nope. See ya.
02:51Yeah, Coach, I only have pet insurance, so if I get injured, they're gonna put me down.
02:55Okay, what I meant was that stuff never happens.
02:58But stuff that never happens happens all the time in cheer.
03:01Sometimes you just talk and hope the right words come out.
03:04We will nail our routine in front of the local media.
03:07The word's gonna get out, and we will attract the top talent from the greater meth area.
03:11And get this, since we're the only school in the conference with a competitive cheer program,
03:15we have no competition.
03:17Any questions?
03:18I have one.
03:19Yes, ma'am.
03:20When's DeMarcus going to apologize?
03:23What are you implying?
03:27I'm not implying anything.
03:28It's your fault Crystal broke.
03:29How would you know you were asleep?
03:31Okay, what are you impo-
03:36DeMarcus?
03:37I wasn't asleep when I saw you bail on the catch.
03:39Peaches.
03:40Speaking of bail, shouldn't you be checking in with your parole officer?
03:42I think your ankle brace is blowing up.
03:44Oh yeah, I can detect when I'm about to beat someone's ass.
03:47Now there's a line between tomfoolery and jackassery and y'all are walking it.
03:50Now if something bad happens to one of us, it's actually on each of us.
03:53The word apologize is not in the list of words or phrases that DeMarcus uses to express himself.
03:58Besides, I was just doing my thing.
04:00I mean, of course it's DeMarcus' fault, but right now I gotta lift him up as a team.
04:05So I don't want to see any more finger pointing.
04:07Yeah, hear that?
04:08She doesn't want to see any more finger pointing.
04:10Understand?
04:11Do you know whose fault it was when the Titanic went down?
04:14Everyone on that boat.
04:16Steve, why don't you just let me handle it?
04:17Yeah, can you just let her handle it?
04:19Hi Captain.
04:20I know it's hard to perform after an accident like we had, but we can, we must, and we will.
04:26All right?
04:27Any more questions?
04:28Just one.
04:29Yes ma'am.
04:30Uh, we suck in a parade.
04:32First of all, that's not a question.
04:34And yeah, okay, we had a setback.
04:36But we do not suck in a parade.
04:39We're about one month and three good cheerleaders away from suck in a parade.
04:43Speaking of which, we're gonna cut all the potty words out of this, right?
04:46I just, I feel like people at my church may watch.
04:49There she is.
04:50Hey baby.
04:51Hey, I was gonna pitch we stay in.
04:53Maybe watch one of your shows where the housewives scream at each other, which somehow relaxes you?
04:57I wish I could, but I gotta go talk to Crystal's parents.
04:59But I am bringing this over as a small gesture.
05:02You're going with grapes and strawberries for breaking their kid?
05:04Feels a little bit more like a tropical fruit situation to me.
05:06It's gonna be fine.
05:07I've had this conversation a hundred times.
05:10Cheer's a dangerous sport.
05:11I mean, no offense, but my athletes don't have the benefit of pads or helmets.
05:14I was wearing a helmet when I got hit.
05:16Doctors left part of that helmet in my head.
05:19Well, I know baby, I've been to the airport with you.
05:21Be still.
05:23Okay.
05:24All right.
05:25I think this is gonna be real quick.
05:27They've been in cheer their whole lives and they know the rest.
05:29All right, well, would you hurry back?
05:31Because I was looking forward to hanging out.
05:33I know, baby.
05:35I'm that fool around.
05:36I cracked the code!
05:39Smart hand looks good leaving the room.
05:40God gave with both hands right there.
05:43I am shattered.
05:44It's a bad word.
05:46Choice.
05:47I was so saddened by what happened to Crystal.
05:50I mean, she is like a daughter to me.
05:53She is by far our favorite child.
05:56In fact, if we'd hide her first, we would have stopped trying.
05:59And we're gonna miss our baby girl.
06:01But I want you to know that even though you're not gonna be performing,
06:03honey, you are always a member of our team.
06:05And in our heart.
06:06What do you mean that she won't be performing?
06:08Because her foot's on backwards.
06:10But you told us the documentary would be about her.
06:14Hm?
06:15We expect her to be in every single routine now.
06:18And to make it to Daytona.
06:20Come on now.
06:21Y'all seem like reasonable people.
06:23They are not reasonable people.
06:29They are not reasonable people.
06:36All right, he comes through here.
06:37Got a tumbling pass, tumbling pass.
06:39He can take her forward in the stomach.
06:42Hey, what are you doing with my dolls?
06:44I'm using your toys to come up with a performance for meeting day that includes Crystal,
06:53which was a lot easier when she could move.
06:56Come here.
06:57Let me give you my famous PG-13 foot massage.
06:59Oh, baby, I don't have time, honey.
07:00No?
07:01No?
07:02You don't have time for this?
07:03Oh, no.
07:04Well, now you can't stop until one of us dies.
07:07I miss you.
07:08I know, baby.
07:09Ever since we stopped working at the same school, I only get to see you ten hours a day,
07:14and seven of those are sleeping.
07:15If I'm lucky, twenty minutes of none your business.
07:19Unfortunately, that's gonna get worse before it gets better,
07:21because DeMarcus broke my flyer.
07:23Well, I'm gonna give you two pieces of advice.
07:25One, do not push DeMarcus too hard.
07:28He will leave you.
07:29And two, under no circumstances, unbox my Stretch Armstrong action figure.
07:33That is our retirement.
07:34Okay, noted.
07:35And I appreciate your opinions, Coach,
07:37but my team responds to tough love, they do.
07:40DeMarcus ain't gonna respond to tough love.
07:42You know who does, though.
07:44Me?
07:45That's right.
07:46So get to work on those calves.
07:47Mmm.
07:49Oh.
07:50Oh.
07:51Oh, no, he's serious.
07:52Oh, no.
07:53The magic fingers?
07:55Calf rubbing always leads to none your business.
07:58Oh, no.
07:59Oh, no.
08:00Oh, no.
08:01Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
08:02Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
08:05All right.
08:06Everybody gather round.
08:07Come here.
08:08Uh, do you think you could, uh, hurry up, please?
08:11I can.
08:12But I won't be responsible for what happens if I do.
08:17My name is Miss Dot.
08:19The way to remember that is there are two dots in Miss Dot,
08:21one on the eye and one is my name.
08:23I have many jobs.
08:26Just like this tape.
08:28It can prevent injuries, set bones, hang pictures.
08:33I even used it once to close a blouse
08:35so my back privates wouldn't show.
08:37One, two, three, four.
08:39Ow, ow.
08:40Seven, eight.
08:41Ow, ow.
08:42Three, four.
08:43Ow, ow.
08:44Seven, eight.
08:45Ow!
08:46What is your problem?
08:47I will tell you what his problem is.
08:49He's barely trying.
08:50Yeah, I'm busting my ass here.
08:51Hey, stay in your lane.
08:52DeMarcus, why did you stop?
08:53Because it's stupid.
08:54Okay, you don't tell me what's stupid.
08:55I know stupid.
08:58Okay.
08:59Oh, I'm stuck.
09:01Yeah, I'm stuck.
09:02This routine is just weird and sad.
09:04You don't tell me what's weird and sad.
09:05I know weird and sad.
09:07Oh, no.
09:09Ah.
09:10Okay.
09:11Come on.
09:12Ah, this is worse.
09:13I'm your coach.
09:15And you need to respect me.
09:16Do you understand that?
09:17Look, I'm just saying.
09:18If you want to attract new talent, forget about Crystal.
09:20Ah.
09:21You let me do my thing.
09:22There is no media day without me.
09:24Well, there's still a Dia, and you ain't gonna be Dia.
09:28Like I said, you just keep talking and hope the right words come.
09:33You're benched.
09:34Steven, you're in for DeMarcus.
09:36Oh, come on.
09:37Yeah, just a sec.
09:38Cheer is like a pyramid.
09:40You need a strong foundation.
09:42Well, actually, I'd be at the top.
09:43But I was a base, so it's like a little confused.
09:45Okay.
09:46My point is, we need to put our best possible team out there on media day.
09:49And that's why I thank Yezu Christos.
09:51We have no competition.
09:52Hey, Tam.
09:53I was in pieces over what happened to Crystal.
09:57Are you smiling?
09:58Your eyes are real squinty.
10:00I'm smiling because of the good news.
10:02Well, what good news?
10:05They transferred Sammy Davis Senior Junior College into your conference.
10:10It's now meth.
10:12And we're the ssssss.
10:13Isn't that fun?
10:14That is so much fun.
10:17Okay.
10:18I'm gonna let you go.
10:19When you talk to your husband, you tell him I said,
10:21thank you for making this happen.
10:23Oh, we're gonna talk about it a lot.
10:26Guess I'll see you at media day.
10:28See you there.
10:39Booney?
10:40Hmm?
10:41Did you have Sammy Davis Senior Junior transferred into our conference?
10:43I sure did.
10:44Thought it would be a nice way for us to spend a little more time together.
10:47But based off the way you're squeezing my battle armor He-Man,
10:50I'm guessing I was wrong.
10:51Booney, I don't want to have to go up against my old school
10:55when I'm trying to say I have the best cheer program in the conference.
10:58Leave it.
10:59Here is my whole thought process.
11:01I want to see more of my wife.
11:03I'm a little bit hungry.
11:04I'm gonna enter us in the conference and I'm gonna make chili.
11:06And quite honestly, I feel like I nailed the situation.
11:08Baby, I appreciate the sentiment. I do.
11:10But maybe next time, when you get a big idea, you just run it past me before the thoughts start processing.
11:15I'm sorry, baby. I see that now.
11:16Okay.
11:17I think honestly it probably just was a little bit of my head injury.
11:20Okay. I'm sorry. Okay.
11:24I'm sorry. You know I understand.
11:26Sometimes when Courtney gets mad, I play the head injury card.
11:31And if that doesn't work, I play the head injury card.
11:34Yeah.
11:35Just so he's safe.
11:36Okay.
11:37I'm so excited about this season. We have got a great group of kids and one middle-aged man.
11:52Meth and football just go together, you know. And I got a real fast team this year.
11:57So I'm excited to introduce some speed into the mix. We're gonna be cooking.
12:02Uh, also, I look forward to getting with the Huddlestone cheer coach.
12:07She's my wife. I can make that joke.
12:09I was actually referring to a different middle-aged man.
12:11I'm a 17th year sophomore, but I am in the shape of my life.
12:15I've got a three pack. Can't tell because boy cheerleaders aren't allowed to wear midriffs like the girls.
12:20And I'd show you, but, uh, if there's one thing I learned in the rental car business, you've got to keep your shirt on.
12:26And I'm with my girl Tina. And the cops are on me. And I realized that that's not even my car.
12:33I got, like, three felonies in the glove compartment. And that's not even Tina.
12:39But, uh, yeah, cheers. Chill.
12:42I do not like drama. And this year, there's, like, a lot of drama on the cheer team.
12:47Last year, I got along with everybody.
12:49When I say hi, don't you say what? Hi, don't what?
12:52What's my goal this season? To be the first man that throws a cheerleader onto the moon.
12:56I'd like to thank all of my followers who made the hashtag white. Videos go viral.
13:02I love you, Crystal!
13:07But I cannot endorse this trend.
13:11Well, the good news is we still have a couple of openings.
13:14So if you want to be a part of a team that is coached by a 14-time national champion,
13:18then you look no further than Hedlinson Junior College.
13:21How do you feel about your old school joining your division?
13:24Well, we're not here to talk about my old school. We're here to talk about the unique opportunity.
13:27Hi! Tammy?
13:30Oh, I haven't seen you since you got fired from your old school, unjustly.
13:35Look who it is. Oh, it's my little Tammy.
13:38I don't want to make this about me.
13:41I miss you so much.
13:43I know, honey. I miss you.
13:45This is my former assistant coach, Tammy Istini.
13:48Are we gonna see some cheer today?
13:50Well, you know, media day isn't the time to do, like, a big show.
13:53So I'm just gonna give you a little taste of what's to come this season at Hedlston.
13:56Uh, cheerpetizer, if you will.
13:58Uh-oh.
13:59I made a booboo.
14:01What?
14:02You know little isn't in my DNA.
14:04Hmm.
14:058 Yes, dude.
14:06Oh, you're trying
14:10to maintain your DNA a lot of power.
14:14I'll have no more an experience.
14:17How you're living to my best life.
14:18Be your pick my bones.
14:19My face will play
14:33One plus one thing
14:34Means we want another ring ring
14:37Hello.
14:37Hey.
14:38Someone please bring us a phone.
14:39Hello.
14:40I'm sorry.
14:41I'm thinking of a voice.
14:42You can't keep up on
14:44Cause the real slime never stops
14:46Cause take a wild kiss
14:47You just been outcast
14:49We're black and white going on
14:52We have arrived now there's no turning back
14:55To be honest, I'm not that impressed.
14:58And show off who we are
15:01Baby, let's see
15:03All the time
15:04And show off who we are
15:08On the roof of the fire
15:10And let's know off who we are
15:13You're a boss.
15:18I feel terrible I'll put you in this position
15:19I-I just thought it'd be fun if we could work together
15:22Is it fine?
15:23At the moment it is not
15:25Well, don't feel bad for me
15:26I know what I'm doing
15:27You know?
15:29If I need you, I know where to find you
15:31Yes, ma'am
15:33It was inappropriate of me to put my team in this conference
15:36And more inappropriate of me to say
15:38I would be getting with the huddlestone cheer coach
15:40Because that will definitely not be happening tonight
15:43All right, buttons, round up!
15:44We're not going on after that, right?
15:46Why wouldn't we?
15:47Because we saw the parade
15:48You see what you did to her?
15:50Listen up, y'all
15:51We're not gonna worry about that
15:52Cause we're here to show people in our conference
15:54That's what it means to be a button
15:55Now when I look at this team
15:57I see grit, determination, heart
15:59That's the stuff of champions
16:01That's what I know people are going to want to be a part of
16:03So we are going to go out there
16:05And we're going to kick some ass
16:07See?
16:08You talk enough and the right words come
16:10Buttons on three
16:11One, two, three
16:13Buttons!
16:14Showtime, baby!
16:16Where do you think you're going?
16:17I didn't hear me take you off the bench
16:19You can't do this without the Marcus
16:23I don't think you understand what it means to be part of a team yet
16:25I understand y'all gonna embarrass yourselves without me
16:28We'll see who's embarrassed
16:38Five, six, seven, eight!
16:40Roll buttons, roll!
16:43Your attention please
16:44This is a fire
16:46Please walk slowly towards the nearest exit
16:48Go!
16:49And then go home
16:58You know I was hoping that Media Day would be a chance to get the word out
17:02And we'd be able to add to our team
17:04But like everything else lately the Lord had a different plan
17:07But I'll tell you what
17:08Even after everything my team was ready to go right back out there
17:11And that tells me one thing
17:13They do not set the f*** in a parade
17:17Hold on, sorry
17:18Oh, it's Tammy, hold on
17:20Hey girl, hey
17:21You sly dog
17:22You got another two members of my team to defect
17:25What are you talking about?
17:26I see grit
17:28I see determination
17:29I see heart
17:30That's the stuff of champions
17:32That's what I know people are going to want to be a part of
17:34If I was going to be betrayed by anybody
17:36I'm so glad it's you
17:38I hope they don't fall and break their knees
17:41Stop it!
17:42Anyway, I'll see you on the Mad Doll
17:49Listen up, I got good news y'all
17:51Because of Media Day
17:52We picked up two new cheerleaders who used to cheer for me
17:54At STSJC
17:56I want you to welcome them
17:57Come on in here, babies
18:01They're one of the team
18:02Let's make them feel at home
18:03Coach, I think it's
18:04I think it's only fair that they try out
18:06Uh, round off hands ring full?
18:08Yeah, I'm sure with a little more stretching it could work
18:20Alright, they're a part of the team now
18:22Y'all make them feel at home
18:24Hey, uh, coach
18:26Can I talk to you for a second?
18:27You're right in the middle of a practice, so
18:28I just wanted to say I'm sorry
18:32Well, don't just tell me, tell the team
18:34Y'all, DeMarcus is here, he has something he wants to say
18:37I am sorry
18:40That y'all didn't understand how important I was to this team
18:43I'm gonna kill him
18:44Sorry that I screwed up at the show off
18:50And that I broke Crystal
18:52Can I come back now?
18:53Come here to me
18:54We talked to you
18:55Listen, I know why you did that flip at the show off
18:58You thought everybody was looking at you
18:59You loved the attention
19:00And you're right, they are looking at you
19:01You're a star
19:03But you gotta make some space for the rest of this team
19:05And they have got to feel safe
19:06I don't think we can win without you, Buck
19:08I know you can't win by yourself, so
19:10You gonna be all in or all out?
19:16I'm all in
19:18Alright
19:19Now go make nice with the team
19:21Hey, Coach, by the way
19:22Yeah?
19:23Got some balls to learn a team go out there on media day
19:25I respect that in a moment
19:29Lord, enough messing around
19:30We got a long way to go before we get to Daytona
19:32100 laps
19:33Let's go
19:36I believe in tough love
19:38The tough part is easy
19:39That was abysmal
19:40Don't look at me
19:41Don't look at each other
19:42You are my shame
19:44It's the love that makes a difference
19:46Peaches, act like you just knocked over a sunglasses hut
19:49And the law's on your tail
19:50Cheer is about push and pull
19:52And as a coach, I know when to push my team
19:54And when to have someone pull the fire alarm
19:58Courtney and I, we got a shorthand
20:00If she texts me an emoji of a woman running
20:02Means she's running late
20:04If she texts me a peach in an eggplant
20:06Means we're going to the farmer's market
20:08Then none your business
20:10And on the rare occasion
20:12Where she sends me this
20:14That means she needs my help
20:17Even when we're not on the same team
20:23We are always on the same team
20:27Your attention please
20:29This is a fire
20:33Boop
20:35Your boy's going to the farmer's market
20:39Alright y'all, warm up's over
20:40Let me see some
20:41Let me see some
20:49That's how we roll
20:54Want to give one more try?
20:56Devastating
20:58I'm sorry, I'm sorry
21:00I've got the giggles now
21:02Just kidding
21:15It's not funny, Tammy
21:17Stop it
21:18It's not funny
21:19I'm sorry
21:22Look out
21:23Look out
21:35You
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