- il y a 2 jours
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AmusantTranscription
00:00How's it going on YouTube? Friends, I've been making videos on YouTube for several years now.
00:04And when you're a YouTuber, well, you receive lots of messages from your subscribers on social media.
00:08And personally, well, it's mostly on Instagram.
00:11Most of the time, it's lovely little words of support, and thank you for that, it's really appreciated.
00:15But sometimes, well, it's you who send me slightly weird messages.
00:19So what I did was, over time, I wrote down people's usernames in my phone.
00:23who had sent me the strangest DMs.
00:25And today, we're going to rediscover them together.
00:28So why rediscover it, huh?
00:31Well, because it's actually been so long since I last opened this notes page
00:33that I have more or less forgotten what was inside.
00:36And so, as a result, well, that means that today is going to be a surprise for both you and me.
00:41Just a quick note before we start, all the usernames that will be displayed in this video
00:44These are modified versions of the official usernames for privacy reasons, right?
00:47So there's no point in looking for them on Instagram because, well, it's not them.
00:50There you go, that way we avoid any excesses, right?
00:52And now that that's out of the way, less talk, more DMs, let's go!
00:58So to start guys, we're going to check the DMs of the person responsible for creating this list, okay?
01:05Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce Mr. Kabil Deter.
01:09Kabil Deter, my friends, is what I like to call a gourmand.
01:12In other words, when he likes something on Instagram, he likes to save it to look at again later.
01:17Except, instead of adding it to his favorites, what he does is send them to me in a DM.
01:23Except, what a huge mistake!
01:25But I read all my homework assignments!
01:26And this is what he sent me.
01:28And guys, this is just one video among many.
01:41Because afterwards, he only sends me videos like that, actually.
01:44Single cheating mom isn't attractive.
01:52Kabil.
01:52My dear, my dear Kabil Deter.
01:54Actually, why, why don't you just add this to your favorites like everyone else?
01:59Why are you only sending me pictures of asses?
02:02That's it!
02:02Nothing but breasts, nothing but breasts, nothing but breasts, nothing but breasts!
02:05And where do you order the books?
02:06But why not?
02:07You know, you know, between two wanks, huh.
02:10Should we put our book ticket in the DM?
02:12Bro, you have plenty of websites for that.
02:14Why are you sending them to me via DM?
02:16Like, in your head, you're thinking, oh yeah, Henri's gonna love that, you know, ah ah ah ah!
02:20In fact, what devastates me is that, forced to do his thing, he looked at our messages on my profile.
02:25That's a real pain in the ass, man!
02:27So, that's the first profile, then.
02:29In itself, it's quite short, but it's very telling.
02:31And we had to start the video with Kabil Deter, because if this list exists, it's your fault.
02:36Okay, next profile!
02:38Louis!
02:39So, what does Louis have to tell us?
02:40Pec, biceps, converging chest press, 4x10, 34.3 kilos, incline press, 3x10, 10 kilos, a drumstick!
02:4812 seconds later.
02:49Legs, shoulders, abs, arms, oh yeah, really, he has a push-pull legs workout, and he noted all his pairs for me.
02:55But damn, that's a pain in the ass!
02:57But I look like I'm in an Excel spreadsheet!
02:58I don't know, write it down in a notebook, on your note!
03:01And besides, you know why, me?
03:02Send this to a bodybuilding YouTuber, it will be more coherent.
03:05Then, when you look at the pairs, I don't mean to be rude, but for example, well, max 17,
03:08I think we're dealing with someone who's just started bodybuilding, but who wants to do it well.
03:12and who takes notes in order to then be able to progress.
03:14And that's good, that way you have a starting point A, and from there you'll progress little by little.
03:17But at least you know where you stand.
03:19And if you ever decide to start weight training too, well, I encourage you to do like Louis,
03:22by taking notes on your performance, that way you have a record of your progress.
03:26That's it, that was Coach Henry for you.
03:27Okay, next person!
03:29Yacine!
03:30Bro, you have too much energy in your videos, shut your mouth a little, okay?
03:33Ah yeah, like that!
03:34The worst part, guys, is that I don't understand it, it's because they follow me.
03:36So, I don't know, do they like me or not?
03:38But you know what?
03:40Well, it's very convenient that they tell me I'm bursting with energy.
03:42Maybe it's because I drink Oli!
03:45Ah, the look on those four-legged faces, you didn't see that coming, Yacine!
03:48For those who don't know, Oli is a beverage brand that offers a healthier alternative to soda.
03:53and a classic energy drink, with a compocline, designed for enjoyment.
03:57without feeling too guilty.
03:58No sugar, no taurine, natural flavorings,
04:00and in the energy range, a special caffeine, Newcaf.
04:03It lasts longer and avoids the post-coffee crash that leaves you in a state of complete collapse.
04:07Besides that, it's also more environmentally friendly.
04:08because in a single container, that's also 50 fewer cans in the bin.
04:12And now, watch out, because for Halloween, Oli is bringing out the nut.
04:16With a new flavor, the tangerine tarantula,
04:18and the return of the great classics: apples, granates, piranha,
04:21cherry cheetah and blood orange bat,
04:23and as a bonus, beware, the goodies, which glow in the dark.
04:26Drink me if you don't want me to haunt you!
04:31Everything is available in a bundle with a thermoshaker or as a set to try everything.
04:34And thanks to my codes that are displayed right here,
04:36You will benefit from discounts on all your purchases.
04:39For those who are interested, I'll leave the link in the description.
04:41A big thank you to Oli for their support.
04:42And now, what's your next message?
04:44And preferably, one who doesn't insult me, please.
04:47Amir!
04:47Show me what you sent me.
04:49Lean Proteins, Chicken Breast, Turkey Breast, Lean Beef...
04:52Damn, it's a shopping list.
04:55Okay, so, after being your favorite porn site,
04:59Here I am now, shopping list.
05:01You know, it's really funny, because the common myth about YouTubers,
05:04It's like, "Yeah, you must have loads of girls in your DMs, etc."
05:07Brother, it's been a disaster for the past hour.
05:09Furthermore, I believe, wait, let me see.
05:11I'll take a look at the list.
05:11Guys, there isn't a single girl.
05:13Ah, yes, yes, yes, yes.
05:14There is one, there is one.
05:14In fact, that'll be the next one, by the way.
05:15Here we go.
05:16Simone!
05:17It's a post-war name, that's the thing.
05:19After that, my name is Henri.
05:20I kind of like a CSC, but oh well.
05:22So, what did she write to me?
05:23"Hey, buy me a car, I really need one."
05:28Do you know what I drive?
05:30A Suzuki Inis.
05:31Personally, I have a small can of food.
05:34If I were to buy an additional car,
05:37It wouldn't be for someone else, would it?
05:38So, yes, I know you're judging, okay?
05:40But in Paris, it's easier to have a small can of food.
05:43that you can walk into a wall like that.
05:45The worst part is that she writes
05:45"You don't follow each other on Instagram."
05:48So, she doesn't even follow me!
05:50It's just someone who came across my Instagram profile
05:52and who thought to himself, "Ah, him!"
05:54"Ah, a sugar daddy, for sure."
05:56Well, I'll answer him.
05:57"Hi, Simone."
05:58"No, sorry."
05:59"The Ursaf took everything from me."
06:01"Next person."
06:02"Maxime!"
06:03So, he left me a voice message.
06:04"Henri, please, I know that every time, you give me views,
06:07"But please, just do me a favor."
06:08"Actually, you have an Instagram page called ***."
06:11"And each time, I ask them if it's possible for them to give me two cushions,"
06:15Because my cushions are smashed to bits on the floor, in exchange for an ad.
06:17"Except they tell me I don't have enough subscribers,"
06:19that I don't have enough... »
06:20"Actually, I don't have much influence."
06:22"So, I wanted to know."
06:23"Basically, if you're willing to help me just by giving me two pillows,
06:26I'd be thrilled to recognize you.
06:28Guys, I have too many questions.
06:29Like, why does he have Amin's voice?
06:31We agree, I'm not crazy.
06:32But is everything alright?
06:33You can hear the fatigue in his voice.
06:35The guy can't take it anymore.
06:36He sleeps for 3 hours a night.
06:39So, my friend, perhaps I won't succeed
06:41to send you two free cushions from ***.
06:44But on the other hand, I've been working with Emma Matla for a while now.
06:48So, maybe, I don't know.
06:50Emma, if you ever watch this video,
06:52help her brother out.
06:55Believe it or not, the message dates back to 2020.
06:57This note is going back.
06:58But I remember that voiceover made me laugh so much
07:00that I had shared it on Twitter.
07:02And there were lots of people who responded.
07:03Go ahead, do it, it's obvious, he's in distress right now.
07:07I would need 3 stools from Besson Dumont while I'm at it.
07:11Come on, Henri, I've been sitting on the floor for 2 months.
07:13Can you do the same for me, please?
07:15From the start, I keep asking for the "take-away" guillem.
07:19Well yes, well yes, well.
07:20Obviously !
07:20I can help you !
07:21Everyone is going to submit their wishlist now.
07:23Yes, that's the problem.
07:24A little while ago, it was a car.
07:25Now there are two pillows.
07:26What's next?
07:27Oh no, guys, I can't, I can't.
07:29Okay, next profile.
07:30Hello, Henri, I'm pooping in this ear.
07:32I don't know how to pull your head.
07:35I wiped myself on the wall.
07:41My friends, every single day, I struggle not to fall into alcoholism.
07:47Next profile.
07:47So Ryan!
07:48Why did I write him down?
07:50Wait, these are anime.
07:52So why is he on the list?
07:53I understood why he was on the list.
07:55But why am I your pornoble, for fuck's sake!
08:24What did I do to deserve this?
08:26Guys, I know it's going to be very tempting to do it after this video, okay?
08:29But please, restrain yourself.
08:31Please don't send me any more stories from gluttons like that.
08:35Then I'll have to justify myself to my girlfriend.
08:37And it's going to be very complicated, okay?
08:39So let's stop, you asses!
08:40Okay guys, new girl profile.
08:42Historically, of everything we've seen, well, we certainly had the gold digger earlier who wanted a car.
08:45But normally, from everything I've seen, I think you can't get any worse than guys, okay?
08:48Let's go!
08:49Charline!
08:50I want you.
08:54In this video, I apologize if your boyfriend is excessively handsome, excessively charismatic,
09:01to the point where women are sending me this type of message.
09:04Oh, what a disaster!
09:05What is this all about?
09:07But she's not even following me!
09:08It's a fake.
09:09No, it's a fake, it's a fake, it's not possible.
09:11Regarding this type of message, in fake mode, without following you, etc.,
09:14I would have thought it would have been an OnlyFan or something like that.
09:16But that's not even it!
09:17The worst part is, it looks like a real profile!
09:19Wait, what?
09:20August 15, 2022, heart.
09:22June 18, 2021, baby.
09:24November 4, 2023, baby.
09:26Oops, what a blunder!
09:28Don't tell me that a married woman with two children sent me this.
09:34Well, listen, madam, I'm going to have to decline your offer, I'm sorry.
09:38Okay, next person.
09:39Oh yes, him!
09:41So guys, you know what? I'm not going to say anything.
09:42I'm just going to press play on its audio.
09:44My name is...
09:45I am 14 years old, I am taking my baccalaureate this year.
09:47Getting your baccalaureate at 14 isn't bad.
09:48I would like to become a content creator on YouTube.
09:51I want to create a series of videos, actually, where I call big YouTubers,
09:54such as you, your brother, or people like Michoui, Noxtac.
09:57It's actually a series of videos where I earn money all week.
10:00All the money, in fact, that I generate during the week, I invest completely in the lottery.
10:03And actually, the title of the series is...
10:05I turned one euro into 100 million euros, because that's generally what people win when they play EuroMillions.
10:10The goal would be to have won the EuroMillions lottery with 10 million subscribers.
10:13That's why, in fact, I'm asking YouTubers if they're willing to feature my channel.
10:17My friend, he's young.
10:18I'm going to tread carefully.
10:19That's rubbish!
10:20He found the phone numbers of loads of YouTubers, through some leak I don't know.
10:24and he sends them a voice message so that the YouTubers can give his YouTube channel some support.
10:28And all the money he raises, he's going to put into the lottery.
10:32And he will earn 100 million euros.
10:34Because it's a sure thing, in fact, when you play the lottery, you win!
10:36And we YouTubers who helped him, naturally, we get nothing in return, right?
10:40Well yes, well yes, well even, you shouldn't take advantage either, asking for money, no, but aren't you ashamed?
10:44Honestly guys, I think that's the most ludicrous message I've ever received in 13 years of my career.
10:50My friend who sent me this voice message, I don't know if you'll come across this video,
10:54But all I can wish for you is all the success in the world.
10:56But, in this case, the idea was flawed.
10:58So, Henri with a...
11:00As for him, I have absolutely no idea why he's in the video.
11:03We'll look at that right away.
11:04Ah!
11:04Another foodie, eh!
11:07So, Henri, he is different from Kabyle d'Ether, in the sense that he doesn't send me lots of profiles.
11:12He only sent me one, and it was Mariona Varoth's.
11:16Mariona, who is a winner of Peking Express, and who is the runner-up of Miss France 2023.
11:21And actually, what didn't get me is that it's not just a crush, it's something that goes back a long time.
11:24That is to say, the first message dates from September 20, 2023.
11:27Then there is a long pause.
11:28And then, seven months later, on March 1, 2024, he sends me a photo of Mariona.
11:33Mariona, I don't know if you'll be passing by, but know that you are a very, very devoted fan.
11:36Next! DM!
11:37Okay, let's move on to the last person, and it's...
11:40François!
11:41And you know what they say? We save the best for last.
11:44So I'm eager to see what he sent us.
11:46We couldn't end up with a normal profile.
11:56No, it was a pain in the ass.
11:57Another gooner!
11:59No, but guys, actually, I have a theory.
12:07He's a big drumming fan.
12:08No, there must be another reason why he's sending me this.
12:10He thought to himself, yeah, Henri, he plays guitar.
12:13Maybe he wants to start a band, he's looking for someone to...
12:16No, he's just a wanker.
12:17Let's be very, very clear.
12:18In fact, at that point, so many people sent me profiles of girls.
12:22that I am officially listed in the sex chat.
12:26Please stop that.
12:27Mitty!
12:28You have a saved image in the bottom right corner of Instagram posts.
12:31That's what it's for.
12:32But anyway, as usual, since you don't listen to me and you don't respect me,
12:35I know this message will be ignored and that this is all I'll be receiving from the ladies on Instagram from now on.
12:39Disaster !
12:39Wait, but I have to answer him.
12:40Hey François, I saw that you were sending me a lot of videos and photos of girls.
12:43Why? Let's see what he says.
12:46No, guys, François answered me.
12:49Sorry, I got confused with my friend, but really, keep doing what you're doing.
12:52Have a good day from Quebec.
12:54François, tell that to others, not to me.
12:56That famous friend you send boobs and asses to, yes indeed!
13:00Say that you thought I would never see your message and that, as a result, you thought
13:03Yes, I can send Henri some butts!
13:05But well, listen, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt.
13:09It's possible he really did mistake my profile for his friend's.
13:13But you know what, I forgive him because he sent me some trolls.
13:16Well, forgive François, forgive me.
13:18Yes, pardon me!
13:19Until next time, subscribe and follow me on Instagram.
13:21Subscribe!
13:33Subscribe!
13:34Subscribe!
13:38Subscribe!
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