- 2 months ago
Holden arranges the swiping of two torpedoes from a supply base so the Sea Tiger can go into action, but just as they get their opportunity for their first combat engagement, the Captain is stricken with a seeming case of appendicitis.
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00:00The
00:30It was 0900 on the morning of May 16th
00:40as we pulled into the Navy Supply Center on Koo Sing Island.
00:44We were still a sea tiger with no claws,
00:46which meant our torpedo tubes were bare.
00:51Well, almost.
00:52But I was determined to get some torpedoes and get into the war.
00:56Hold on, lines!
01:05Captain?
01:08Sir, uh, I have been giving the situation regarding our torpedoes a great deal of thought.
01:14Spare me, Mr. Holden.
01:15Well, sir, it seems to me that what this situation calls for
01:18is a creative look at the free enterprise system.
01:21Seems to me Barney and Clyde are a similar philosophy.
01:23You don't remember what happened then.
01:25Well, of course I do, sir, but they were a bit too creative.
01:27There is a limit, you know.
01:28I know. It's reassuring to know that you know.
01:30I just haven't found mine yet.
01:32It may surprise you, Mr. Holden,
01:33but there are isolated cases in military history
01:36where supplies have been obtained through the proper channels.
01:39No, you're kidding.
01:41So if it's all the same to you, I'd just like to try my best shot.
01:46Well, sir, you are the captain.
01:48But don't be disappointed
01:49if your best shot turns out to be just a blank.
01:52Proper channels, in this case, led me to a dead end.
01:56Captain No Way Sawyer.
01:58My only hope was that the reliably unreliable Mr. Holden
02:00was maneuvering through channels of his own.
02:03This is a supply center sermon, not a trading post.
02:07You cannot have two torpedoes for five nurses.
02:11It just doesn't work that way.
02:12Well, I understand, sir.
02:16I didn't mean to imply...
02:18The issuing of ammunition and materiel
02:20is authorized by ComSubPAC on a need-to-have basis.
02:24Now, if ComSubPAC won't give you any torpedoes,
02:28then they must be saving them for fighting submarines
02:31that do need them.
02:31Are you all right, sir?
02:33Oh, oh, yeah. Yes, sir.
02:34I, uh...
02:35And since ComSubPAC has not assigned me any Army nurses,
02:40it follows that I must not need them,
02:42which I don't.
02:44Which I don't.
02:49Captain Sawyer.
02:52Well, of course I want it in writing.
02:54You think I was going to memorize 300 serial numbers?
02:57What's the problem, sailor?
02:58This company, sir, it keeps slipping out.
03:03Oh, yeah? Well, let me give it a try.
03:05Gee, thanks, Lieutenant.
03:07Hey, who gets these babies, anyway?
03:09Oh, the 207.
03:11The 207? Well, that's my boat.
03:13Yes, sir.
03:13Hey, the good old 207.
03:17Stand by. He's starting to, uh, with the flags.
03:20Here it comes.
03:21Two...
03:22Two...
03:22Oh...
03:23Seven...
03:23Seven...
03:24No!
03:28Got it.
03:38Gee, thanks, Lieutenant.
03:39You know, that's the first time I've ever had an officer help me in my truck.
03:43Well, I'm a very helpful fellow.
03:45As a matter of fact, I'm headed back to the 207 right now.
03:47I'll be glad to show you the way.
03:48Hey, great.
03:49All right, then do it.
03:51I've just got one more thing to say to you, Sherman.
03:54Sir, I've heard about your crew's reputation for scavenging.
03:57You have?
04:00I understand half the Asiatic fleet once went a whole month without toilet paper because of your shenanigans.
04:06Oh, sir, I can assure you that was a mistake of requisition.
04:11The, uh, Gleir is murder, sir.
04:13My eyes just aren't used to that kind of light.
04:16In the submarine, we don't see that, that, that much daylight.
04:18You're not all right, are you, Sherman?
04:20I'm fine.
04:21You were saying something, sir?
04:22I was saying that that type of thievery is not going to happen here.
04:25Oh, yes, yes.
04:26Do I make myself clear?
04:27Loud and clear, sir.
04:28I assure you, we won't touch your toilet paper.
04:35I'm sorry.
04:38Who?
04:41I've got six ships waiting out there to be loaded.
04:44The gentleman loaded with supplies last week.
04:47Move it in.
04:56Hold on to those lines, men.
04:58Come on, ease it in there.
05:01The torpedo's not your laundry.
05:03Ease it up.
05:04Easy.
05:05Get that nose down.
05:06Keep it coming on the nose slowly.
05:08Okay, you got it.
05:14And don't call again.
05:17Sorry about those torpedoes, Sherman, but my hands are tied.
05:20Well, that's all right, sir.
05:21I understand.
05:22Calm, sub-pack.
05:23Beautiful island you have here.
05:25It's a cruddy island.
05:27Well, I suppose any land looks good to a submariner, sir.
05:30Sherman, just between you and me.
05:33What's it really like?
05:35Sailing aboard a submarine with five nests.
05:39Tight, sir.
05:40Very tight.
05:43There you go.
05:49We didn't waste any time leaving Koo Sing.
05:52I had a feeling things could get a little sticky
05:54when the Admiral found out about his two missing tin fish.
05:58Over all lines.
06:00All clear behind us, sir.
06:03Mr. Holden?
06:05One of these days, you're going to go too far.
06:08Shall I confine myself to quarters again, sir?
06:11No, I get the feeling you enjoy it too much.
06:15Sir, you know, Mr. Watson was not present during the...
06:19the, uh...
06:20theft.
06:21I believe that's the word you're looking for.
06:23That's pretty good.
06:25See, it was my feeling that, uh,
06:26all by the book should not be made aware of all the details.
06:29You know how sensitive he is.
06:30He might want to give those torpedoes back.
06:33Maybe we should, sir.
06:34Oh, I intend to.
06:36In fact, at this very moment,
06:37I have Hunko looking for the...
06:39theft.
06:40But that must take about six months.
06:43That's right.
06:44Captain, what's wrong?
06:51I have a little stomachache.
06:55Stovall comes on watch in three minutes.
06:57Would you mind taking over until he comes up?
06:59Not at all, sir.
07:00I think I'll see if Sickbay has something.
07:02You know, it's probably just butterflies, sir.
07:04The excitement of going into combat.
07:07It's nothing to be ashamed of, though.
07:08I get them myself.
07:09Yes, as a laundry officer,
07:10the pressure must be intense.
07:12Well, carry on, Mr. Holden.
07:16And in your brief command up here,
07:17try, oh, try,
07:20to keep our necks out of the wringer.
07:22Aye, aye, sir.
07:22My dog, what's doing?
07:39Well, sir, since you made me acting pharmacist,
07:41mate, I'm trying to brush up on things,
07:42you know, just in case.
07:43That's a good idea.
07:44You got anything for a stomachache?
07:46Stomachache.
07:47Let me look that up for you, sir.
07:50Let's see now.
07:51That's, yeah, that's S.
07:54Captain, what's wrong?
07:56Take it easy, sir.
07:57I'll help you.
07:59Nurses!
08:00To the Sickbay!
08:01Major Hayward!
08:02Nurses!
08:04Hurry!
08:06Now, don't panic, sir.
08:07What's wrong?
08:08It's the captain.
08:10That's all right, Major.
08:11I did a good job.
08:12All right, just fly back, Captain.
08:13We better check him out.
08:15Just relax, Captain.
08:18Where does it hurt, Captain?
08:20My stomach.
08:22Ah!
08:22Will you cut that out?
08:23I'm going to be a little.
08:26Is there anything I can do?
08:27Is he all right?
08:28We don't know yet.
08:29Under stomachache, it says you should first lie the patient in a prone position.
08:32Excuse me, sailor.
08:34Claire, what's his pressure?
08:35130 over 80.
08:36Is there anything I can do?
08:38Uh, why don't you get some sleep, sir?
08:39We'll call you as soon as we know something.
08:41Respiration, 22.
08:42Pulse 108.
08:43Temperature.
08:44100.2.
08:45Patient suffering from severe generalized pain in the abdominal region.
08:48Melissa, Major.
08:49I'm perfect.
08:50Patient, weak, skin color normal, disposition, lousy.
08:56What does he have?
08:58Appendicitis?
08:59Sure looks that way.
09:00We can't rule out diverticulitis.
09:02Oh, excuse me.
09:03How do you spell that?
09:04D-I-V-E-R.
09:06Lieutenant.
09:07How about gastritis?
09:08That's with a G.
09:10It also could be a spasmer of the colon.
09:11Well, without a complete blood workup, we can't really offer more than a guess.
09:15I'm getting up.
09:17Sir, I don't think that would be such a good idea.
09:19How many for appendicitis?
09:20Oh, my God.
09:24They're voting.
09:27It is the democratic way, sir.
09:29Congratulations, Captain.
09:30It's unanimous.
09:32Captain!
09:33We've just intercepted a message from an Air Force patrol plane.
09:36What happened to you, sir?
09:37You look terrible.
09:38It's all right, Mr. Watson.
09:39Where is it going?
09:40A Japanese oil tanker, the Nina Maru, has been sighted 70 miles due east of us.
09:47Did you hear that, everyone?
09:49Tiger's going after a tanker.
09:52Oh, Captain, don't be foolish.
09:54Appendicitis has nothing to mess around with.
09:56Appendicitis?
09:57How did it get to be appendicitis?
09:59By unanimous vote.
10:01Captain, we're going to have to get you to a complete medical facility.
10:05The longer we wait, the riskier it gets.
10:07Right.
10:08You know that, Captain.
10:08I agree.
10:09I'll have gossip on the radio right away.
10:11We'll find out the location of the nearest hospital ship.
10:13Mr. Holden, no.
10:14You'll do no such thing.
10:15Mr. Watson, set course for that tanker.
10:17This mission is yours.
10:18Take over.
10:19Oh, yes, sir.
10:21Captain, I knew you were stubborn, but I didn't realize you were stupid.
10:25Captain, please.
10:27Appendicitis can be very serious.
10:29If it became acute, we all know what that means.
10:32Uh, what does that mean?
10:34We would have to operate.
10:36Mr. Watson, you have your orders.
10:38Go ahead.
10:40Yes, sir.
10:41You can count on me, sir.
10:43This is the moment they prepared us for at the academy.
10:49I'll get that tanker for you, sir.
10:50There was a hospital ship due west, but on my orders, we proceeded on a course due east, hoping
10:58to find that Japanese tanker, Nina Maru.
11:01My crew deserved the chance to sink its first ship, and I wasn't about to deprive them of
11:06it just because of my condition.
11:07They say the appendix is a useless appendage.
11:10And that's exactly what I felt like, lying in that bunk, weak and helpless.
11:14Mr. Watson, any sign of the Nina Maru?
11:18Negative, sir.
11:18But we're closing in fast.
11:22Nick.
11:24Nick, he needs a doctor.
11:25This is very serious.
11:26Can't you get Lieutenant Watson to call off this chase?
11:29You saw the man in action.
11:30He invented gung-ho.
11:32Yeah, but you're very persuasive.
11:33Can't you talk sense to him?
11:35Talking sense to Lieutenant Watson is like convincing a lovesick salmon to swim downstream.
11:41But I will try.
11:49Helmsman, let full rudder set new course.
11:51Zero, nine, seven.
11:53Planesman, ten degrees.
11:54Up, bubble.
11:55Level at eight zero feet.
11:59Lieutenant Watson, I must say I really admire the way you've taken over.
12:03Command of the Sea Tag.
12:06What do you want, Holden?
12:07Did you ever stop to think that if you dropped Commander Sherman off on a hospital ship, you
12:12would really be the captain, huh?
12:17Won't work, Holden.
12:20This is the control room.
12:22About the conning power?
12:23Nah, Lieutenant, you know what I mean.
12:26Holden, I am not, repeat, not turning this boat around.
12:31I have my orders.
12:33The Sea Tiger is going in for its first kill.
12:40In case you haven't heard, appendicitis can do a little killing of its own.
12:45Mr. Holden, I'm sure that you wouldn't understand.
12:49But the captain gave me an order.
12:51And in my book, a direct order is a direct order.
12:56Well, I think it's about time you tossed your book into the bilge.
12:59The captain isn't thinking straight.
13:01Isn't that obvious?
13:02Perfectly rational to me.
13:03The Three Stooges seem rational to you.
13:05That's all, Mr. Holden.
13:07Our discussion is over.
13:12Excuse me, Mr. Watson, but the man and I think that...
13:14Yes, sir.
13:15A direct order is a direct order, sir.
13:18Cotton, I made you some soup and toast.
13:21Oh.
13:23No thanks, Gallardo.
13:24I'm not hungry.
13:25Sorry.
13:26Gallardo.
13:31Captain, I am really worried about you.
13:34No, no, don't worry about me.
13:35I'm fine.
13:36Fine.
13:37No problem.
13:37You should be in the hospital.
13:40Can't I convince you to turn this boat around?
13:43You worked on it, you probably could.
13:49His temperature is 100.6 and he's still in severe pain.
13:52I think we should prepare for surgery.
13:53I'll prepare the sterilizer.
14:02Do you have any chloroform?
14:05I don't know, ma'am.
14:07We have to knock him out somehow.
14:09Let me see your supplies.
14:11Captain, they're serious.
14:13They're really going to operate.
14:15Sir, how do I get through to you?
14:16You have got to call off Killer Watson and abort this mission.
14:20I don't understand you, Mr. Holden.
14:21You're not consistent.
14:22Your philosophy is always to avoid the war.
14:24Why did you appropriate the torpedoes in the first place?
14:27It was a challenge, something I had to do.
14:29Like climbing my own Mount Everest.
14:31Besides, I'd never stop, uh, appropriated anything that weighed 2,000 pounds.
14:37And now you obviously regret it, right?
14:39Of course I do.
14:40I happen to think that a life, a human life, yours, is worth a whole lot more than 30,000 gallons of crude oil.
14:48Well, that's where our value is different.
14:51We're at war, Mr. Holden.
14:52Every gun that gets through could be responsible for another American casualty.
14:56I don't know all those other guys.
14:58I just know you.
14:59Sir, we're picking something up on Sonar.
15:02And I'm taking her up.
15:03Jackpot!
15:12It's the Nina Maru.
15:15It's the Nina Maru, sir.
15:16And her belly is loaded.
15:17Good work, Mr. Watson.
15:19Prepare to attack.
15:20You can't jump around like that.
15:22You must stay down, sir.
15:24Radio room, con.
15:25Contact the comm sub-pack immediately and request permission to engage the enemy.
15:29Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
15:30You're right.
15:30We can't radio sub-pack.
15:31We have still in total years.
15:33I can't believe I did that.
15:40Hold that message!
15:42We'll go for a starboard side.
15:45Horwich, does radio have an answer yet?
15:47Radio con, do we have an answer?
15:49You're lucky I was able to stop gossiping in time.
15:51You what?
15:52Skipper, you don't radio headquarters until afterwards.
15:55What if you miss?
15:57It'll go on your record.
15:58You think they're going to give you your own command if you can't hit a tanker?
16:01Range, 3,000 yards.
16:04Mr. Watson, we better go.
16:07Okay, Holden.
16:08Just next time, let me do it.
16:11I'm in command.
16:14Sure.
16:16Commander, I order you back into bed.
16:17I'll be just a minute.
16:18Please, sir, come down.
16:20Acting?
16:20What's our range, Mr. Watson?
16:22Women are forbidden in the conning tower.
16:23No, I must get him out of here.
16:25I just want to take one look.
16:26Range, 2,000 yards and closing.
16:28Sir, the acting captain was doing a fine job.
16:31Now, why don't you just go back...
16:32Ready, torpedo tube one.
16:33Set depth for five feet.
16:35Ready, torpedo tube one.
16:36Set depth for five feet.
16:37You should be in bed, sir.
16:39He's right, sir.
16:40Let's go.
16:40We're getting too close.
16:41Slow in just a one-third.
16:43Please, sir, let me.
16:44Let him.
16:46Oh, you're going to get a chill, sir.
16:48Don't jostle that appendix.
16:49You're getting me mad now.
16:51Viejo, cabeza dura.
16:52Te voy a amarar a la cama.
16:54He's driving me crazy.
16:55I know.
16:56She's turning.
16:57Which way?
16:58Starboard.
16:59Turn with her.
16:59Left, full rudder.
17:00Right, full rudder.
17:01Left, right, full rudder.
17:02Right, right.
17:03Right, right.
17:04Get back to bed.
17:05Get back to bed.
17:06I'm sorry.
17:08This is crazy.
17:10Sure ain't like submarine school.
17:12Range 900.
17:14Stand by to fire one.
17:15Stand by to fire one.
17:16Will you fire, Mr. Watson?
17:17Will you fire, Mr. Watson?
17:19Will you fire, Mr. Watson?
17:20At what?
17:22Run away, sir.
17:28Bullseye!
17:29We got it!
17:30We did it, sir!
17:32At last.
17:34At last.
17:34We did it, sir!
17:36We're no longer virgins!
17:39I didn't say that.
17:42Broome, come on.
17:43Laugh it out.
17:44This is a happy occasion.
17:45I am laughing.
17:47Congratulations, Captain.
17:49Well, congratulations to you, Lieutenant.
17:52For once you didn't have any accidents.
17:55I can't believe I did that.
17:57I'm terribly sorry.
17:59I can't believe you did that either.
18:00Take it easy, Captain.
18:23Careful.
18:23Step by step.
18:24Slowly, slowly.
18:25All right, let's not push our luck.
18:31Ha, Captain, get back to bed.
18:34Radio control.
18:35Signal sub-pack that the Sea Tiger has scored a direct hit
18:38and sunk the Japanese tanker Nina Maru.
18:42Gossett, this is the captain. Disregard that message.
18:45Sir.
18:45Why?
18:46Did you ask permission to attack?
18:48Oh, no, sir.
18:49Mr. Holden said that I...
18:50You know better than the listener, Mr. Holden.
18:52Gossett, send this message.
18:55The Sea Tiger reports sighting the tanker Nina Maru
18:58breaking up on a coral reef.
19:00Breaking up on a coral reef?
19:02Sir, we scored a direct hit.
19:05Yes, but we can't tell them that we sunk it.
19:09But we know we did, right, men?
19:11Yes, sir!
19:12All right, let's get you to a hospital ship, right, Captain?
19:15Nonsense. I never felt better in my life.
19:23That's not funny, Mr. Holden.
19:25Mr. Holden.
19:29He's not joking.
19:33This man is in pain.
19:39I'm sorry. It seemed that you were joking.
19:42No, I'm sorry.
19:43Don't worry about it, Skipper.
19:44I just shouldn't eat any of that dumb tuna fish.
19:47Tuna fish?
19:48As in Gallardo's tuna fish surprise tuna fish?
19:52That no one will eat tuna fish?
19:55Except me for lunch.
19:56Me too, last night.
19:58Well, I'll be.
19:59Food poisoning.
20:02Food poisoning.
20:03Well, you both can't have appendicitis.
20:05Well, at least we don't have to operate.
20:08What a shame.
20:09I was sort of looking forward to that.
20:13Sir.
20:13Sir.
20:22Mm-hmm.
20:24Not bad, sailor.
20:25Captain, I've really got to hand it to you, sir.
20:36How's that?
20:37The way you handled that radio message to headquarters about the tanker breaking up on the coral reef.
20:42That was just beautiful.
20:45Thank you, Mr. Holden.
20:47Of course, I wasn't too bad either, if I do say so myself.
20:51Pilfering those torpedoes by making up the numbers for the submarine, that was pretty ingenious, wasn't it?
20:58When you think about it.
20:59When you think about it.
21:02You knew all along that I was going to take those babies, didn't you?
21:10That's why you stayed with Captain Sawyer so long, to keep him out of my hair.
21:14You did it to me again, didn't you?
21:24Good commander always knows what his men are up to.
21:31Captain, we've got a message from Captain Sawyer, sir.
21:34Oh, really?
21:36Congratulations on a well-placed coral reef.
21:39And remember, you still owe me two torpedoes.
21:41What does that mean, sir?
21:45I'll tell you what it means.
21:47It means that a good commander always knows what his men are up to.
21:52See you tomorrow.
21:59Yeah, entertain him.
22:01Go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go.
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