00:00If you could go back and give 18-year-old Carla Lane one piece of advice on her first day in the industry, what would it be?
00:05Oh, this is a good one.
00:07I would tell her to make content.
00:10Carla Lane early on did not make any content.
00:13Carla Lane worked for other people.
00:15Carla Lane got a paycheck and went home and was Carla.
00:20I wish I was smarter and had a content of me 18, 19, 20.
00:25But how could you have possibly known?
00:27But if I can go back and tell myself what information I have, that's what I would tell myself.
00:32Going with, bitch, I don't give a fuck what kind of phone you have, what kind of camera.
00:3620 years ago?
00:38Did you even have cell phones 20 years ago?
00:40We did.
00:41I had my first cell phone at 13.
00:43Okay.
00:44I remember because I still have the same phone number.
00:46Okay.
00:47God, how old was I when I got my cell phone?
00:49I don't even remember.
00:50I just remember I had a Thomas Guide in my car when I turned 16.
00:55That's what I remember.
00:56I go with, just imagine printing out the, um, what is it?
01:01MapQuest.
01:01Yes, MapQuest.
01:02Yeah, if you didn't print, if you forgot your MapQuest map at home, fuck it, you were lost.
01:08You were not finding your way home.
01:09You would have to find what is called a pay phone.
01:12You would have to have quarters, and you would have to call the persons that you were going to, and hopefully you would know their number by heart, or you would have it written down.
01:22You'd have to call them and be like, I'm on the corner of, I don't know.
01:26You'd have to go to somebody at a liquor store.
01:29Where are we?
01:30Can you give me directions to somewhere?
01:32Yeah, it's insane.
01:34And now, like, we can't, I can't go half the places without my phone.
01:37Oh, my God.
01:38And it's, and it's also, like, for traffic now, I'm like, what do you mean?
01:41I, if I go one way, it's going to be 20 minutes, and if I go the other way, it's going to be two hours.
01:46I, okay, so I got a new phone recently, and I left my phone at T-Mobile because it, like, was going to take, like, two hours to transfer all my content because I had so much.
01:54So I decided to, like, go home and, like, you know, go do something and then come back.
01:58And then I was like, I don't know how to get home from here.
02:01Like, without my GPS system, I was like, do I do a right?
02:04Do I do a left?
02:05I know I live over there, but how do, okay.
02:09Where's the freeway?
02:09I don't know.
02:10What if I get lost?
02:12How, I'll never find my way out of Thousand Oaks.
02:19Oh, my God.
02:20We're so useless.
02:21I go with, it's, it's interesting because it's, like, one of those, it's, like, if the power goes out, what the fuck are we going to do?
02:28Most of us are going to survive a few days and go with, oh, my God.
02:30I'm stuck.
02:31I can't leave my house.
02:32I don't know what to do.
02:33How do I charge my phone?
02:35You won't need your phone because the power is out, so you're not getting any reception.
02:39Congratulations to living in the Stone Age.
02:42Jesus Christ, what are we going to do?
02:43We're done for.
02:44Yeah.
02:44Just going to dig a hole and just live there.
02:47That's where I live now.
02:48You can find me in the hole.
02:50As long as you have your big MILF titties, you can find me.
02:52Exactly.
02:53There'll be many floating devices.
02:54If God sends, like, a huge flood.
03:01Where's Carla?
03:02I see her bobbing over there with those MILF titties.
03:05I got my MILF titties.
03:07I think I'm going to make it, Holly.
03:10Oh, man.
03:14Fuck.
03:14Fuck.
03:14Fuck.
03:14Fuck.
03:14Fuck.
03:14Fuck.
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03:16Fuck.
03:16Fuck.
03:16Fuck.
03:16Fuck.
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