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00:01Previously on Desperate Housewives
00:03I booked our room at the motel.
00:04I don't want to be alone tonight.
00:06Neither do I.
00:07Affairs got serious.
00:09If you got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
00:12You're showering alone tonight.
00:14I love you. Yeah, I said it.
00:16An ex-lover.
00:17Wait, wait, what are you doing?
00:18Just letting you know I'm here for you.
00:20Let's just say he was grateful. Very grateful.
00:23Spun out of control.
00:25You're fired.
00:27And when a crime was committed.
00:30A neighbor was suspected.
00:32Everybody thinks I'm the perv who attacked Julie.
00:34Just in case someone should try to come in here and hurt you.
00:36Do you know where your father and I keep the gun?
00:38But it was the victim.
00:39What were you thinking, dating a married man?
00:41Who had secrets.
00:42Hey Julie, I miss you.
00:51It is in our nature to judge the people around us.
00:56We judge the way strangers dress.
01:00The way our neighbors tend their lawns.
01:04And the way our friends act in public.
01:10Yes, we make these judgments all the time.
01:16Never thinking that one day we may be judged ourselves.
01:22Ow!
01:23Girls, what are you doing?
01:32Oh, for Pete's sake.
01:34What did I tell you about sledding down the staircase?
01:37Not to use the good suitcase?
01:39Besides that, don't do it at all.
01:41What are we supposed to do?
01:43You won't let us play on the roof anymore.
01:48Hey, Laura.
01:49What happened?
01:50Don't worry, she's okay.
01:52These two knuckleheads decided to sled down the staircase.
01:55Why would you let them do that?
01:56No, don't blame me.
01:57I wasn't even in the room.
01:58You left the girls unsupervised?
02:00Well, they were playing.
02:03Come on, I can't watch them every second.
02:05Why not?
02:06I look after Juanita when she's at my house and she goes home without a scratch.
02:10Only because she's indestructible.
02:12Honey, do that thing where you run into the wall.
02:15Watch.
02:16It's hilarious.
02:17You're pretty cavalier considering your carelessness almost killed my daughter.
02:26I gotta say, Laura, you're kind of a wet blanket since you quit smoking.
02:31Why don't you try a pipe?
02:33And I've gotta say, Gabby, I think you're a lousy mother.
02:39Did you just say that to my face?
02:41Yes, and I'm afraid I won't be bringing my daughter here anymore.
02:44The safety and well-being of my child must come first.
02:47Fine.
02:48Juanita only had Rachel over because she felt sorry for her.
02:51It was a pity play date.
02:53And of course this means Rachel won't be attending Juanita's birthday party.
02:59More cake for us!
03:00Beat it!
03:01Let's go, sweetie.
03:04Yes, it's in our nature to judge those around us.
03:09It's also in our nature...
03:11You know, if you'd taught your kid how to tuck and roll on impact, we wouldn't even be having this conversation!
03:16To blame someone else for our mistakes.
03:20It had been two weeks since Julie Meyer had been attacked.
03:37And when she came home from the hospital, the residents of Wisteria Lane were there to welcome her back.
03:47She was greeted by children who came with signs,
03:51housewives,
03:53housewives who came with desserts,
03:57and old friends who came with flowers.
04:04Also in the crowd was a new friend who came with an agenda.
04:10Great, Julie.
04:13I'm so glad you guys came.
04:15See you later.
04:16Bye.
04:17Bye.
04:24Hey, Julie.
04:26Welcome home.
04:27I've been so worried about you.
04:33Is there someplace we can go we can talk?
04:36No.
04:37We're not doing this anymore.
04:40Julie, please.
04:41Dominic.
04:43I'm sorry.
04:44It's over.
04:45Hey, Mrs. McCluskey.
04:48You're going after the pizza.
05:01Wait.
05:03Hi.
05:04I'm so sorry I'm late.
05:05I have three parties this weekend and I'm up to my elbows in canapes.
05:09Why isn't Katherine helping you?
05:11I had to let her go.
05:12What?
05:13You're kidding.
05:14She started working this event and she went berserk.
05:17And then when I fired her, she intentionally scratched my car.
05:21Wow.
05:22I flipped her the bird the other day after she cut me off.
05:24Won't make that mistake again.
05:26I think she needs help.
05:27I think she's a drama queen.
05:28But if she is in trouble and we don't do anything,
05:31it could be Mary Alice all over again.
05:33I don't know.
05:34Susan, what do you think?
05:35Well, I know she's going through a rough time,
05:37but I have trouble feeling sorry for her.
05:39I get that.
05:40After that stunt she pulled at your wedding.
05:42True.
05:43And did you tell him about Katherine hitting on Mike?
05:46What?
05:47When did that happen?
05:54He didn't mention it, didn't he?
05:57Of course.
05:58Yeah.
05:59We laugh about it all the time.
06:01Oh, then look, there's Mike now and I could use good laugh.
06:06Would you excuse me?
06:10Sweetie, can I talk to you a second?
06:13If it was no big deal, why didn't you just tell me?
06:15Julie was in the hospital.
06:17I didn't tell you because I, crazy me, thought it might upset you.
06:20And here's why I'm upset.
06:21Because now I realize that Katherine is not hurting.
06:23She's plotting.
06:24So I'm going to go over there right now.
06:26Susan, you do not want to pour gasoline on this fire.
06:28Well, you're right.
06:29I want to pour gasoline on Katherine.
06:31And if you love me at all, you'll give me a match and an alibi.
06:33Honey, let her have her lies.
06:35Let her plot.
06:36You got nothing to worry about.
06:38You mean everything to me and Katherine means nothing.
06:43Well, that's sweet.
06:47I'm going to go tell her you said that.
06:48Get back here.
06:56Hey.
06:58You want to talk about this?
06:59Yeah, sure.
07:00Let's have a nice father-son chat about how you're cheating on mom.
07:03Do you know how stupid I felt?
07:08I got into a huge fight with Julie because I thought she was lying to me.
07:12That she was just telling me she had a boyfriend to blow me off.
07:15And I followed her home and it turns out she does have a boyfriend.
07:19You.
07:22I'm sorry.
07:25And for what it's worth, it's over.
07:28If I ever see you two together again...
07:35I'm going to tell mom.
07:42You want to tell your mother?
07:44Come on.
07:45Let's go. Right now.
07:46Come on.
07:48What?
07:50You think you can dangle that axe over my head?
07:53Then go for it.
07:55So you want mom to know...
07:58You want to destroy her life?
08:01Your mom finding out that I had an affair won't destroy her.
08:04Her finding out that you knew about it?
08:05Yeah, that will.
08:07Yeah, I'm the bad guy.
08:11You think your mom's the perfect one in this marriage?
08:15There you two are.
08:17They're bringing out a cake for Julie.
08:18Everything okay out here?
08:26Yeah.
08:29Just having a little father-son chat.
08:31That's my boys.
08:33Oh, come on. They're cutting the cake.
08:48Come in.
08:55Hey, Karen.
08:56Lynette, when you've needed a favor from me, have I ever let you down?
09:01Last month we needed a sitter for Penny, but you didn't want to miss Oktoberfest.
09:05And just last Thursday...
09:06Okay, new way in.
09:08I've got a problem with Roy. He's been kind of down lately.
09:10Oh, what's wrong?
09:12He lives on a fixed income and he can't afford to pay for nice dinners.
09:15But when I pay, he sulks. He says I'm keeping him.
09:18Hell, at his age, he should be glad to have something keeping him besides formaldehyde.
09:23You know what I mean?
09:25And the favor would be?
09:27I was thinking maybe you and Tom could hire him for a few hours a week as a handyman.
09:32You know, so he'd have a little walking around money.
09:36Gee, oh no.
09:39Okay, girl talk time.
09:40When Roy's spirits are drooping, the problem is global.
09:45You get the picture?
09:47Getting the picture isn't the problem, it's getting rid of it.
09:50Oh, come on. Try him for one week.
09:52I'm only hesitant because he's your boyfriend.
09:55And I'd hate to risk straining a good friendship.
09:57Well, if I were that good a friend, would I be putting you in this awkward position?
10:01Excellent point.
10:05He's hired.
10:06Thanks. You'll never know what you've done for my sex life.
10:12Good.
10:22I love it that you do that.
10:24What?
10:26When I first brought you here, you didn't want to set foot in this room.
10:29And now you get sad every time we have to leave.
10:31Well, it's now our place.
10:36It's not what I would have chosen, but it's growing on me.
10:43I'm sorry. I thought you checked out.
10:46That's okay. We're just going. Tips on the dresser.
10:49Well, thank you, sir.
10:50Thanks.
10:58Excuse me.
11:00I seem to have lost an earring. A little pearl stud.
11:03I can help you look for it.
11:07Hello?
11:11Oh, hi, Orson.
11:13No, I told you your gray suit is at the Taylor's.
11:17Where am I now?
11:19Oh, at the supermarket, getting us something for dinner.
11:23Oh, you already did all the shopping.
11:25Well, great. I will just put all this food away and come straight home.
11:30Bye.
11:32Found it.
11:34It was buried in the sheets.
11:36Thank you very much. Let me get you a little something.
11:38Oh, my wallet's here somewhere.
11:44That's all right. I'm sure you're eager to get home to your husband.
12:01Oh, okay. Well, thanks for letting me know.
12:05What's wrong?
12:06Heidi Bremmer just informed me her kid can't come on Saturday.
12:10She and Don are going to the nursing home to visit his mother.
12:13So why are you mad?
12:15Because it's a lie. Heidi hates his mother.
12:17She wouldn't cross the street to visit that drooling fossil.
12:20And that's the third cancellation I've gotten today, and every excuse has been a crock.
12:24Why would people lie to get out of a kid's party?
12:27Because Laura Miller's out there spreading her poison.
12:29She's telling every woman in the PTA their kids aren't safe in my house.
12:33And those house frow cronies of hers are laughing it up.
12:37Juanita will be heartbroken if no one comes to her party.
12:39Oh, no, no, no. They'll come.
12:41We just have to build it, that's all.
12:44This is about to cost me money, isn't it?
12:46Carlos, there are women out there who think I'm a bad mother.
12:49It is your job to support me. Now just shut up and fork over some cash.
12:53Wouldn't it be easier to just watch the kids while they play?
12:58Did you just say that to my face?
13:02Here. Take the whole wallet.
13:09Voila. Grilled langoustine. Your favorite.
13:13How very thoughtful of you, Orson.
13:15Well, they weren't easy to find.
13:17The man at one store tried to sell me shrimp.
13:19And when I tried to explain the difference, he gave me an argument.
13:24What is it? We're service people these days.
13:26They used to be polite and deferential.
13:29Now they just sneer right in your face.
13:32It's intolerable.
13:34Well, I wouldn't let it spoil a nice dinner.
13:36Sorry. I had a very irksome encounter myself today.
13:39Really? Where?
13:41At a cafe.
13:43I was having lunch and this waitress was rude and superior.
13:51Superior? To you?
13:53Well, you should have whipped out a copy of your best-selling cookbook like you did last week in the food court at the mall.
13:58Well, I doubt this woman would have been impressed.
14:01Really? Well, you sure put that pretzel vendor in his place.
14:04I was so startled. I didn't know what to say. I just let it go.
14:07Well, is this a cafe you frequent often?
14:11As often as I can.
14:14Well, next time you're in there, I think you should clear the air.
14:17Demand a little courtesy.
14:19Thank you, Orson. I think I may do that tomorrow.
14:24This is nice, isn't it? Sharing a meal, talking about our days.
14:27Why don't you pass on that cafe tomorrow and let me make you a nice salad or an omelet.
14:34Thank you, dear. But tomorrow I'm planning on having something a bit spicier.
14:39Lynette, look what Roy did.
14:45Open, closed, open, closed. We don't need to use that spatula anymore.
14:49That's great. So, Roy, since you're so ingenious, how about you build some flower boxes for our bedroom windows?
14:58Well, our window if you want, but not the kids.
15:01Why not?
15:02Because they'll never water them.
15:03Well, I'll remind them.
15:05They can't keep a goldfish alive for more than one day. What makes you think they're going to take better care of geraniums?
15:10I don't know. I just know we're getting flower boxes.
15:13So, Roy, you could go ahead and get those started.
15:16Are you good with this, Mr. Scarvo?
15:22Sure. What the hell.
15:24Okay. I'll go measure the windows.
15:26Thanks, Roy.
15:31What was that?
15:32What?
15:33He just went over my head to yours.
15:35I knew I liked that guy the minute he walked in.
15:38Look.
15:41Open, closed, open, closed.
15:46What's up?
15:49Would you like a pizza?
15:51Hi, Laura.
15:52Kirsten.
15:53Heidi.
15:54Hi.
15:55Gabrielle.
15:56I'm glad you're here, Laura. I wanted to apologize.
15:58Things got a little heated the other day, and I think we both said some things we didn't mean.
16:02I appreciate that, Gabrielle.
16:04Good.
16:05Well, now that that's behind us, if Rachel would like to come to Juanita's birthday party, we'd love to have her.
16:13Sorry, but I'm still not comfortable with that.
16:15Oh, that's a shame.
16:17We're going to have face painting, and cotton candy machine, and a clown.
16:23A clown? Where's the clown?
16:25Oh, not here, sweetie. He'll be at Juanita's birthday party on Saturday. The one your mommy won't let you go to.
16:30I want to go.
16:32Rachel will talk about it later.
16:36What are you doing, Gabby?
16:37Oh, I'm sorry. She asked me a question. I just answered it.
16:41For example, if she were to ask me if we were having a bouncy house, I'd have to say, just the biggest bouncy house you've ever seen.
16:48Bouncy house? I love that house!
16:51Is the clown going to be in the bouncy house?
16:53Maybe, but you'll never know.
16:56Gabrielle, please.
16:57You're right. I'm sorry. This is cruel.
17:01Come on, Juanita. We've got to buy bananas.
17:04The people at your party are going to want something to feed the monkey.
17:07A monkey? A monkey? A monkey?
17:09A monkey? A monkey?
17:11We'll talk about it later. We'll talk about it later.
17:14Let's go!
17:18Excuse me.
17:19Did you need something in your room?
17:23No, I'm not checked in. I came here to see you.
17:30I don't have any weed, lady.
17:33Sorry?
17:34All you ladies with a nice car thinks anyone who talks like this must have ganja to sell.
17:40I am not here to buy ganja. I came about yesterday.
17:44I appreciated you finding my earring, but I didn't care for your attitude.
17:48It was very insulting.
17:51Did I say one crossword to you?
17:53You didn't need to. Your disdain was perfectly clear from the look you gave me.
17:59And there it is again.
18:02I have 12 rooms to do. I don't have time to argue.
18:05Fine. Then I'll help.
18:10Let it... please.
18:11I won't look at you no more, okay?
18:14I'm just saying you shouldn't make snap judgments about people.
18:18You see I'm having an affair and you just assume I'm a bad person.
18:22Kind of dope fiend.
18:24If you knew more about my marriage, you'd see me very differently.
18:28I don't need to know about your marriage.
18:31If you're going to form opinions about it, then yes, you do.
18:35My husband is a controlling ex-con.
18:37I begged him for it to worse, but he won't let me go. I'm practically his prisoner.
18:43Your husband's a good man.
18:45You know nothing about him.
18:47I know he does your shopping for you.
18:49When you lied to him on the phone, told him you were at the grocery store,
18:53he said he already went.
18:55And your point is?
18:57You know what I would give to have a man do my shopping for me?
19:00Make my life a little bit easier?
19:02And you're not even grateful.
19:04You're just sneaking off here to do the nasty with your boyfriend.
19:07Who are you to judge me? You can't even make hospital corners.
19:11What do you want me to say, lady, huh?
19:13Your cheating's not a sin when you do it in pearls.
19:17Now, unless you want to start on the toilet, I think we're done.
19:20Wow. These flower boxes are really coming along. If you have a moment, no rush, would you hang this bird house for me? I was thinking on that big tree.
19:30Got it.
19:31Oh, thanks.
19:32Roy, over there. That tree.
19:33Yeah, I was talking to Tom about it this morning and he wants it over here.
19:34Okay.
19:35Well, that's probably because he forgot the sprinklers go off over there. So, do me a favor and hang it in.
19:37Wow, these flower boxes are really coming along. If you have a moment, no rush, would you hang this bird house for me? I was thinking on that big tree.
19:44Got it.
19:45Oh, thanks. Roy, over there. That tree.
19:51Yeah, I was talking to Tom about it this morning and he wants it over here.
19:56Okay. Well, that's probably because he forgot the sprinklers go off over there. So, do me a favor and hang it in that tree. Thank you.
20:19Because she's telling me she wants it on the other side of the yard.
20:22Roy.
20:23Gotta go.
20:25Boy, you're everywhere. We should get you a bell.
20:29Why are you calling Tom?
20:30To make sure he's okay with where you want to hang this thing. I mean,
20:34he is the man of the house.
20:37Okay. I know, since you're using a cell phone, you know what century it is.
20:41But just to clarify, you don't have to keep checking with Tom. I make plenty of decisions around here.
20:47I noticed. I just prefer to treat the guy with a little respect.
20:53Excuse me?
20:54Just because you like crunching his walnuts doesn't mean I do.
20:58I beg your pardon? His walnuts are completely intact. And you know what?
21:02I think we are done here. You can go.
21:05Fine. As soon as I hang this birdhouse.
21:08Oh, and he said he doesn't care where it is, so you win. Again.
21:11This isn't about winning and I just fired you so you can go home.
21:17No. I promised Tom I'd do this and I'm doing it.
21:20You know...
21:21I'd clean that up. But you just fired me.
21:31Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I thought you saw me.
21:36No, uh, no, no. It's okay. I was just...
21:51Yeah, I should have realized I'm sorry.
21:57I guess you heard that after it happened some people thought that...
22:03Oh, um, I know it wasn't you, Danny.
22:06Hey, that night we argued, you said you were seeing a guy.
22:18You think maybe he had something to do with it?
22:20Um, I thought about it. But no. He's not that kind of guy.
22:27So you have no idea?
22:29I wish I did. I haven't been able to sleep.
22:33Every time I'm about to close my eyes, I'm afraid I'll be there when I wake up.
22:38You know what? I think I might have something to help.
22:59Thank you all for volunteering.
23:02Here's the thing. Whoever attacked Julie is still out there.
23:04So it's up to us to look out for each other.
23:07Which is where the neighborhood watch comes in.
23:11So Susan's gonna talk to you about patrol duty.
23:13Susan?
23:19Susan.
23:27What is she patrolling for?
23:28These tonsils?
23:34Um, we still need people for 9 to midnight on Thursday. Any volunteers?
23:43I'll check runway.
23:48Um, okay. We have Mona Clark.
23:52And...
23:53Irma Pritchett.
23:57No one else?
23:58Okay, meeting adjourned.
24:03There's coffee back in the kitchen.
24:10This bridge has got a clogged shower drain, and I promised I'd fix it for her.
24:13Mmm.
24:18I don't think she saw that one. You wanna do it again?
24:20I'll see you at home.
24:22Susan.
24:23A word.
24:27Did you not see my hand up?
24:29I was trying to volunteer.
24:30I saw.
24:32I was just trying to pick the people who I thought could best protect our neighborhood.
24:35So you picked Irma Pritchett?
24:36Her son is in a nursing home.
24:37Yes, Catherine. Irma is old.
24:38But she's not a big fat liar.
24:40Excuse me?
24:42Well, are you not going around saying that my husband hit on you?
24:44Susan.
24:45Susan.
24:46I know you're under a terrible strain, but do you really think it's a good idea to air your dirty laundry in front of all these people?
25:06You're the one with dirty laundry.
25:07My laundry is clean, folded, and thin.
25:09I don't know what to say.
25:10I don't know what to say.
25:11I don't know what to say.
25:12You're the one with dirty laundry.
25:13My laundry is clean, folded, and put away, you loon.
25:16Um, girls?
25:18Everything all right here?
25:20No.
25:21It's not.
25:22First she calls me a liar.
25:25And now I'm a loon.
25:26Okay.
25:27You all heard the things she was saying.
25:29You saw the way she acted at my wedding.
25:30Not everyone was invited to your wedding.
25:33Geez, Mona.
25:34You're like a dog with a bone.
25:35Let it go.
25:36I understand why you're upset.
25:38I'd be on edge too if my marriage were having problems.
25:41Okay, Mike and I are perfectly happy.
25:43And the only problem we have is you.
25:45So stay out of our lies or you'll be sorry.
25:49Well, if you two are so happy, then where did he just disappear to?
25:53Ugh, he's snaking a lady's drain, okay?
26:00And yes, I realize how that sounded.
26:02Get your minds out of the gutter.
26:12Okay, Rachel.
26:14Have fun.
26:16Coco the clown will make you any balloon animal you want.
26:19You know, maybe I should stay for a little while.
26:21Oh, come on.
26:22I'm watching them.
26:23I've got everything under control.
26:25Will you be here?
26:26Can you believe her?
26:27I'm a good mom, aren't I?
26:28People trust me.
26:29Hey, I brought my kid, didn't I?
26:30Yes, you did.
26:31But wait, you're staying.
26:32I'll get us a drink.
26:33Hi, sweetie.
26:34What's the matter?
26:35Aren't you having a good time?
26:36The man is putting the monkey away.
26:37He said he was too tired to play anymore.
26:39Oh, I don't think so.
26:40That ape is on the clock to 4.
26:41Hey, what gives?
26:42Sorry, Mr. Phibbs did two shows yesterday.
26:43He needs a nap.
26:44No way.
26:45I paid for two hours of monkey.
26:46I want two hours of monkey.
26:47I want two hours of monkey.
26:48I want two hours of monkey.
26:49Okay.
26:50No way.
26:51I paid for two hours of monkey.
26:52I want two hours of monkey.
26:53Oh, you're going to be a good time.
26:54Oh, you're going to be a good time.
26:55Wait, wait, you're staying.
26:56I'll get us a drink.
26:57Hi, sweetie.
26:58What's the matter?
27:00Aren't you having a good time?
27:01The man is putting the monkey away.
27:02He said he was too tired to play anymore.
27:03Oh, I don't think so.
27:04He needs a nap.
27:05No way.
27:05I paid for two hours of monkey.
27:07I want two hours of monkey.
27:09Let him go.
27:10I can do the gig alone.
27:11No offense, Coco, but I need this to be the greatest party ever.
27:14And your act isn't exactly zinging the kids.
27:16Hey, I killed at your other kid's party.
27:19Those kids were three.
27:20These are seven-year-olds.
27:22It's a big time.
27:23Crappy balloon animals ain't gonna cut it.
27:24We need the monkey.
27:25Lady, he's tired.
27:27Well, then give him some banana-flavored coffee.
27:29You screw me on this, and I swear, Fids won't have a work in this town again.
27:34Come in.
27:45You called for a light bulb?
27:47The bedside lamp.
27:55I saw you pulling a hour ago.
27:58Your gentleman friend stand you up.
28:00Sorry to disappoint you, but he just called.
28:03He's on his way.
28:04Hmm.
28:05That's nice.
28:08Well, if you finish your magazine, there's a Bible in the nightstand.
28:14Tell me something.
28:15Did he cheat on you just once, or did he do it all the time?
28:21Who?
28:23I've been wondering what makes a woman so quick to judge anyone who has an affair.
28:27And I think I know.
28:28Your husband cheated on you, didn't he?
28:31My husband was the best man that I ever knew.
28:47But a good man wasn't good enough for me.
28:52I was like you.
28:55I wanted fun, excitement.
28:57So I found myself a boyfriend.
28:59Good looking guy.
29:02Sexy.
29:03And we had ourselves a real good time.
29:05You having a good time, lady?
29:06Yes, I am.
29:13Enjoy it while it lasts.
29:15It didn't last long for me.
29:17And when it was done, I had no husband and no boyfriend.
29:23So now I'm cleaning rooms.
29:28Every day I see women in here acting just as stupid as I was.
29:32I don't say a word to them.
29:34I just give them a look.
29:40Well, I'm sorry your affair ended so badly.
29:45That doesn't mean that mine will.
29:46You seem like a nice lady.
30:08Don't you ever feel guilty?
30:10No.
30:16Yes, all right.
30:20Yes, I feel guilty all the time.
30:25You don't know what it's like when I come home.
30:29And my husband's at the door.
30:33And there's such love in his eyes.
30:34Such hope.
30:39And I want to shake him and say, stop it.
30:42Stop loving me.
30:44I'm not worth it anymore.
30:46Don't you want to be worth it again?
30:54Hi, honey.
30:56I'm so sorry.
30:58Is there some kind of problem?
31:02No, sir.
31:04Just turning on a light.
31:06There you are.
31:19Now, it's a kid's party.
31:22Are you still mad about Laura?
31:27Party's a success.
31:28Kids are having a great time.
31:29We're drinking margaritas.
31:31What's not to likey?
31:32You know what?
31:35You're right.
31:36I won.
31:37Laura and her stuck-up posse thought her kids weren't safe at my house.
31:41I've shown them the best time they're going to have all year.
31:45Gabby.
31:46I know they're loud.
31:47Kids, the dump's talking!
31:49No, I think that there's a problem.
31:51MJ?
31:51MJ, what's going on?
31:52The monkey's killing the clown.
32:03I've got to get my tranquilizer gun.
32:06I told you he needed a nap.
32:08He was already on edge, and then that damn clown popped a balloon in his face.
32:11Laura, I was here every minute.
32:27It's not my fault they sent us a homicidal monkey.
32:30The important part is the kids had a good time and created lifelong memories.
32:33Oh.
32:34Great, you forgot your goodie bag!
32:48So, I still don't get why you fired Roy.
32:51I mean, he was put in the birdhouse where you wanted it, right?
32:53It's not about that.
32:55He said I emasculate you.
32:57He said that?
32:58Well, not in those words.
33:00He went with a more colorful, nut-cracking analogy.
33:04He is funny.
33:05He is not funny, and this would be a really good place for you to jump in and tell me I'm not a castrating bitch.
33:11Sure.
33:12Just put down the knife first.
33:15Wow.
33:16We are not laughing at this at all, huh?
33:17No.
33:18Oh, come on.
33:19Babe, we're great.
33:20You know that.
33:21What do you care what he thinks?
33:24I don't care.
33:25It's just, it bugs me that he's judging me.
33:29What are you doing with that?
33:31I thought I'd barbecue some chicken.
33:33Mmm.
33:34It's almost dinner time, and that's still frozen.
33:36Just get some burgers from the garage.
33:39I got it.
33:55Hey, Roy.
33:56Can I talk to you?
33:57Sure thing, pal.
33:58Here, take a load off.
34:01If it's about me getting into it with your wife, though, I have to stop you first and say I'm sorry.
34:10Well, thanks.
34:11I mean, I know times have changed, but a man's still a man.
34:15And you deserve to have your wife respect you.
34:18She respects me plenty, Roy.
34:20Here's the thing you got to understand about Lynette.
34:31She grew up without her dad.
34:32Her mom was a drinker, so she had to be responsible for everyone.
34:36Yeah, well, that's rough.
34:38Yeah.
34:39It left her with this constant fear that everything could suddenly fall apart.
34:47And that's why she needs to control everything.
34:52Of course, she can't.
34:54Nobody can.
34:56But she can control me if I let her.
35:04So I do.
35:09Because it makes her feel safe.
35:14And that is my job as her husband.
35:20To make her feel safe.
35:22You're the best, Cavill.
35:34I'm going to try.
35:36Now, if you'll excuse me, I have hamburger to fetch.
35:48Stop beating yourself up.
35:50It wasn't that bad.
35:52Carlos, a monkey almost killed a clown.
35:56That is the definition of a bad children's party.
36:00Oh, man.
36:04Laura's right.
36:05I'm a terrible mom.
36:06Hey, come here.
36:11Look, I am no expert at raising children.
36:17All I know is when all those other kids ran screaming to their moms,
36:22Juanita jumped in the bouncy house and zipped it up, and Celia played dead.
36:26Those girls are smart.
36:27Yeah, they were quick on their feet, weren't they?
36:30Which they wouldn't be if you'd been hovering all over them their whole lives.
36:35They have learned to be independent and resourceful, and that is thanks to your negligence.
36:40Oh, that's so sweet.
36:41That better not be the good suitcase!
36:47Mom!
36:48Julie?
36:49Julie?
36:50Julie?
36:51Julie?
36:52Julie?
36:53Get my...
36:54He's on the job.
36:55What's going on?
36:56Somebody is outside.
36:57Oh, my God!
36:58What is that?
36:59It's a gun.
37:00Where did you get that?
37:01Give that to me.
37:02What are you thinking?
37:03Oh!
37:04It's loaded, right?
37:05I have a gun!
37:06I've called the police!
37:07They'll be here any minute.
37:08I've called the police!
37:09They'll be here any minute!
37:10Oh!
37:11Oh, my God!
37:12I'm the police!
37:13I can't.
37:14I can't.
37:15I can't.
37:16I can't.
37:17I can't.
37:18I can't.
37:19I can't.
37:20I can't.
37:21I can't.
37:22I can't.
37:23I can't.
37:24I can't.
37:25I can't.
37:26I can't.
37:27I can't.
37:28Give that to me.
37:29Give that.
37:30What are you thinking?
37:31Oh!
37:32It's loaded, right?
37:33Catherine?
37:46You shot me!
37:52Oh my god, Catherine, the gun just went off.
37:55Are you alright?
37:55You tried to kill me!
37:57Okay, I just shot you.
37:58Let's not be throwing accusations around.
38:00It looks like it just grazed your shoulder.
38:02There's hardly any blood.
38:04What happened?
38:05Susan shot me!
38:06Called the police!
38:06I told you she was going to snap.
38:08It's always the pretty ones.
38:09It was an accident.
38:10Bob, I want you to be my lawyer.
38:12No, no, I called Bob as my lawyer.
38:15We heard a gun go off.
38:16Susan shot me!
38:19Susan!
38:20I didn't know it was her.
38:23What were you doing sneaking around my house?
38:25I was on neighborhood watch.
38:26You didn't have an assigned shift.
38:28Tom Scavo had to study.
38:29He asked me to fill in.
38:30Well, you should have checked with me.
38:33That's what I was trying to do when you shot me!
38:35All right, all right.
38:36Everybody, just calm down.
38:38I'm going to go call an ambulance.
38:41Perhaps we should unload this before someone else gets hurt.
38:46Breathe, dear.
38:46Susan just shot Catherine Mayfair.
38:58What?
38:59She's okay, but she's just freaked out.
39:02Huh?
39:03I never pegged Susan as a gun owner.
39:05Oh, crap.
39:09That's our gun.
39:09I gave it to Julie.
39:10What?
39:11Why?
39:12She was scared.
39:13She wanted protection.
39:15That gun is under our real name.
39:17If they trace that back to us...
39:19Well, we are not going to let that happen.
39:23You're going to jail for this.
39:25Everyone heard you threaten me at that meeting.
39:28I have witnesses.
39:29Oh, please.
39:30If I were going to kill you, I wouldn't do it in my own front yard.
39:33I'd sneak into your house and shoot you while you were asleep.
39:35Not that I would ever do that.
39:43Catherine, where are you going?
39:45Home.
39:46To call the police.
39:51Hey, Catherine.
39:53The ambulance is on its way, but I brought a first aid kit.
39:56Why don't you let me clean you up and then you can call?
40:00Ow!
40:01Ow!
40:03Just leave it.
40:04Hand me the phone.
40:05I want to call the police.
40:08Dumb move, Catherine.
40:10What?
40:13Listen to me.
40:15You a mic?
40:16I see it, too.
40:20Those looks he gives you, he's still crazy about you.
40:25I know.
40:27So?
40:28Use your head.
40:29You want to call the police and have the mother of his kid carted off to jail?
40:32Well, don't be stupid.
40:34High road all the way.
40:38That's a good point.
40:40Mm-hmm.
40:40And besides, you walk around with a bandage on your shoulder for a few days,
40:45she looks like a monster,
40:47and you come off looking like a saint.
40:49So how are we doing here?
40:56I'm fine.
41:02Yeah.
41:04I don't think we'll be needing that ambulance anymore, hmm?
41:07I'm telling you, you could totally see her eyes.
41:09So, am I going to jail?
41:13Nah, she's not calling anybody.
41:15She was a little worked up.
41:16We talked.
41:17It's gonna be okay.
41:19Okay, then.
41:20It is in our nature to judge the people around us.
41:32If they ignore our wishes,
41:34we believe they are disrespectful.
41:38If they don't watch their children,
41:42we conclude they are unfit parents.
41:45If we catch them cheating,
41:50we assume we know their reasons.
41:54But what happens when we finally stop for a moment to judge our own lives?
42:00It can be painful to step back and see what we've been doing.
42:11And even more painful to realize
42:14we have no intention
42:17of stopping.
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