00:00What?
00:03Hello, I'm Alan Cumming, and this is Extraordinary Readings of Ordinary Things.
00:22Disinfectant wipes.
00:25Kills 99.9% of viruses and bacteria.
00:29It's that 0.1% that concerns me.
00:32Kills Staph E. coli.
00:34Is Staph like the infection that's kind of...
00:37Oh, you can just wipe this over your area.
00:41To disinfect and deodorise hard, non-porous surfaces.
00:45Wipe surface.
00:47Use enough wipes for treated surface to remain visibly wet for four minutes.
00:52Let surface dry.
00:54For highly soiled surfaces.
00:56Clean...
00:57We've got to stop this.
00:59It's too dirty.
01:00One of those tube things that you wear in the pool.
01:03Warning.
01:04To avoid danger of suffocation, keep this bag away from babies and children.
01:09Do not use in cribs.
01:11Not the MTV series, I imagine.
01:14Snoop D-L-double-G.
01:15Beds, carriages or playpens.
01:18This bag is not a toy.
01:20Discard bag and any other packing materials immediately after removing product.
01:25Do not reuse this bag.
01:27Reuse the bag.
01:29Put your dog's feces into a plastic bag.
01:35Flaxseed.
01:36The interesting thing and little known fact about flaxseed is that Trader's host Alan
01:40Cumming has it in his vegan protein shake every day.
01:44That's how you get these guns.
01:46Milling flaxseeds is like opening a treasure chest.
01:49In order to maintain the integrity of the wholesome...
01:52I can't believe I'm talking about this flaxseeds integrity.
01:57Also, what I love about this flaxseed, it's an employee owned company.
02:03Liberté.
02:04Egalité.
02:05Fraternité.
02:06Toilet paper.
02:07Is that what you say in America?
02:08Toilet paper?
02:09Yeah.
02:10I call it loo roll.
02:11That's right.
02:12Anyway.
02:13Toilet paper.
02:14Or loo roll.
02:15Smooth tear.
02:16Trusted softness.
02:17Better tear.
02:18I know I've been looking for a better tear for years.
02:20If you already know what I've been looking for a better tear for years.
02:25If you are interested in additional roll extenders, please call.
02:30I am interested.
02:31My castle's very big.
02:33I could do with an extender or two.
02:35Next thing is these.
02:37Bubbly sort of prickly things.
02:39They look a bit like when you draw cells.
02:44But they're sort of like...
02:46What are they?
02:47LED spiky balls.
02:49They light up.
02:50How do they light up?
02:51What?
02:53Do not attempt to remove the batteries or you will die.
02:58How long does it last?
03:00A Taylor Swift album.
03:04This is the vinyl version of Fearless.
03:07Taylor's version.
03:09I just want to look at a section of the lyrics.
03:14We're driving down the road.
03:16I wonder if you know I'm trying so hard not to get caught up now.
03:21But you're just so cool.
03:23Run your hands through your hair, absentmindedly making me want you.
03:28I'm not sure if that means he's running his hands through his hair absentmindedly,
03:34or if Taylor is absentmindedly wanting him.
03:40Maybe that's the glory of Taylor.
03:42It could be both things.
03:44You've been watching extraordinary readings of Ordinary Things with me,
03:50The Traitor's Alan Cumming.
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