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Gaymer Series
EastSiders Gay Theme TV Series

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Transcript
00:00Hillary, what are you doing out there?
00:11It's not even 10 a.m.
00:12I always do my son's salutations in the morning.
00:14God!
00:16Since when?
00:17And you make coffee.
00:18Who are you?
00:19I'm your sister, and I miss you.
00:22Why do you always spend the night at Tom's?
00:24Because there's only one dead here.
00:25I always used to let you crash my slumber parties.
00:28Yeah, your friends held me down and put makeup on me.
00:30It's why I'm gay.
00:33Hillary, it's been almost a month.
00:37Which is why I am looking at apartments this afternoon.
00:41Okay, what's going on?
00:43Well, I met someone.
00:46Oh, shit.
00:49Hi, Ian.
00:51Hey.
00:52You're not gay, are you?
00:54Tell me you're at least bi.
00:56No, he's straight.
00:58He's straight enough.
00:59This actually makes a lot of sense.
01:03Hi.
01:04Hey.
01:05Hi.
01:06Hi.
01:07Hi.
01:08How you doing?
01:09Hey.
01:10Hi.
01:11Thanks for being by talking to a guy at your service.
01:12Hi.
01:13Hi.
01:14How you doing?
01:15Hey.
01:16Hi.
01:17Thanks for being by talking to a guy at your service.
01:19Hi.
01:20I know you guys said not to bring anything, but I can just put it down.
01:24So, I swear to God this is not what it looks like.
01:27It's a dick.
01:28Hey, girl.
01:29Hi.
01:30Has anybody shown up yet?
01:31Am I the first one here?
01:32What can I help with?
01:33It's about how all of the different ways that being queer has actually affected society
01:39in ways that people don't even understand.
01:41Wait, don't you have somebody here?
01:43No, not today.
01:44Let's go.
01:45Let's go.
01:46Shh!
01:47Should we be writing these down?
01:49I should probably leave.
01:50We should say thank you for the delving.
01:55This one is from Leslie.
01:57Oh, great.
01:58I didn't know your size, ladies, so I guessed.
02:00Thanks, Leslie.
02:01I'm just going to put that with the rest.
02:03You're welcome.
02:04Actually, thank all of you for coming and supporting us.
02:08We're so excited.
02:09Thank you, Stephanie, for organizing the party.
02:12Yay, Stephanie.
02:13Thank you, Darla, for making the cake in the shape of a vagina.
02:16So amazing.
02:17I was inspired by Georgia O'Keeffe.
02:19More like Georgia O'Keeffe.
02:23Looks delicious.
02:24Can't wait to dig into that, you know?
02:26I mean, drunk.
02:27As he should be.
02:28We should all be drunk.
02:29I propose a toast.
02:31To eight years.
02:32Cheers.
02:33Two kids.
02:34And finally fucking getting married.
02:37About time.
02:38About time.
02:39Cheers.
02:40Yeah, about time.
02:41Cheers.
02:42I don't know why anyone gets married.
02:46Hey you.
02:47Hey.
02:48How's life?
02:49Good.
02:50Good.
02:51I'm writing a lot.
02:52That's great.
02:53Hey, listen.
02:54Have you guys been tested recently?
02:55Not since the GRE.
02:56Smart arse.
02:57Um, well, look, you should probably get tested.
02:58What is that?
02:59It turns out I have gone over here.
03:00It's not a big deal or anything.
03:01This is it.
03:02testers recently?
03:04No sense the GRE.
03:06Smart arse.
03:08Um, well, look, you should probably get tested.
03:10What is that?
03:12It turns out I've gone over here.
03:14It's not a big deal or anything.
03:30This is it!
03:32Oh, my God!
03:34That's a big deal!
03:36Echo! Echo! Echo!
03:38Echo!
03:40I'll leave you guys to check it out.
03:42What do you think?
03:44I mean,
03:46it's great,
03:48but how much is it?
03:50A lot, probably.
03:52Aren't you,
03:54you know, kind of broke?
03:56I mean, yeah, I'm majorly in debt.
03:58So what are we doing here?
04:00I believe in asking the universe for what you really want.
04:04It's never really worked out for me.
04:06Maybe we should just drive around to look for signs.
04:08Maybe this is a sign.
04:10What is?
04:12Ian?
04:14Have you thought about us maybe moving in together?
04:16I mean,
04:18because neither of us could afford a place like this on our own,
04:20but together?
04:22Uh, no.
04:24Not, not really. Not yet.
04:26I, I don't really think about things.
04:28This is a perfect loft for a cool young couple.
04:30I mean, you could stay here for two, maybe three years
04:32while you get your landscaping business to take off,
04:34and I go back to school,
04:36and then we probably need a bigger space,
04:38because let's be honest,
04:39neither of us are getting any younger,
04:40you especially.
04:42I mean, I'm not thinking about kids or anything,
04:44but, yeah,
04:46we should probably start thinking about thinking about kids.
04:50We've been dating a month.
04:52That's a really long time.
04:54Don't you think?
04:56I don't think.
04:57What are you talking about?
04:58You're a very thoughtful person.
05:00I want you to close your eyes.
05:04I want you to imagine growing old with me.
05:13Hey.
05:14Hey, what's up?
05:16Not much. Just got off work.
05:18How about you?
05:20Just sitting around.
05:22Um...
05:24I have something to tell you.
05:26Yeah, me too.
05:28You go first?
05:29I think you should go first.
05:30No, you should go first.
05:31I'm shitting blood.
05:33What?
05:35I'm not going to say it again.
05:36I need to go.
05:37I've got to look up the closest STD clinic on my phone.
05:48Hey.
05:49Hi.
05:50Just let me grab my keys.
05:51Do not come in.
05:52I don't want to alarm you, but I have two small children in the car.
05:56Do you have a flu or something?
05:57I'm babysitting my niece and nephew today.
05:58And I thought it would be nice if the four of us went to the park.
06:03That sounds very nice to me.
06:04That sounds very nice to me.
06:05Harrison bites, just fair warning.
06:06I'm used to it.
06:07One sec.
06:08Parents are almost universally cool about it.
06:09This is Los Angeles.
06:10Yeah.
06:11Yeah.
06:12Yeah.
06:13Yeah.
06:14Yeah.
06:15Yeah.
06:16Yeah.
06:17Yeah.
06:18Yeah.
06:19Yeah.
06:20Yeah.
06:21Yeah.
06:22Yeah.
06:23Yeah.
06:24Yeah.
06:25Yeah.
06:26Yeah.
06:27Yeah.
06:28Yeah.
06:29Yeah.
06:30Yeah.
06:31Yeah.
06:32Yeah.
06:33Well, this is Los Angeles.
06:34Occasionally you get an asshole, but it just might be assholes.
06:37This is Los Angeles.
06:39How long have you been in practice?
06:42I'm counting residency....five years.
06:46You two are trying to figure out how old I am.
06:50Five years?
06:53Never done anything that long.
06:56When did you start working with wood?
06:58When I was 11.
07:00Early bloomer.
07:02Summer camp.
07:04I'm kidding.
07:06I started making furniture last year.
07:10I just put the first few things I made up on Etsy,
07:13and things really started taking off, so...
07:16What did you do before that?
07:18Graphic design.
07:20That's what I studied in college.
07:22I was an interior designer for a little while.
07:24Translator.
07:26Did a little print modeling.
07:28Translator?
07:30Yeah, I'm a military brat.
07:32Where are you from?
07:34The internet.
07:36Remember?
07:37Really?
07:38Yeah.
07:43New Orleans.
07:45New Orleans?
07:46Originally.
07:48Nothing.
07:49I've always wanted to go there.
07:51Yeah, man.
07:52Missed that city.
07:54South, not so much.
07:58Moved out here with a bunch of friends,
08:00so at least I have a little piece of home with me.
08:02That's great.
08:04Yeah.
08:05We have this big Mardi Gras party every year.
08:07My friend Ella's down in K-Town.
08:09It's huge.
08:10Baby and a king cake, all that shit.
08:12I'll take you.
08:14When's Mardi Gras?
08:16February 17th.
08:18That's...
08:20a few months from now.
08:22What are you up to this Friday?
08:24Or is that too much of a commitment for you?
08:26I, um...
08:28I don't know.
08:32Harrison, get away from the birds!
08:34Sorry, I'll be right back.
08:36Harrison, get away from the birds!
08:38Sorry, I'll be right back.
08:50They go out with these guys, the guys dump them,
08:52and then all of a sudden I'm the one who's supposed to make them feel better.
08:54That's happened to me.
08:55That's happened to me before.
08:56Over and over.
08:57I'm tired of it.
08:58I know.
08:59You make them feel like the wrong bars.
09:01I'm really sorry that some dude bro broke your little straight girl heart,
09:05but it doesn't mean that I am going to eat your pussy.
09:07Oh, fuck you.
09:08Yes, it does.
09:09Of course it does.
09:10Maybe.
09:11I'm 33 years old.
09:12Why am I still putting up with this shit?
09:13Maybe she's bisexual.
09:14Oh, Stephanie, do not start.
09:15No, I'm just saying for some people, sexuality is a very fluid thing.
09:18Thanks.
09:19Yes, if you're doing it right, there usually is a lot of fluid involved.
09:23Alright, gross.
09:25Alright, gross, Toni, you're making my party gross.
09:28Sorry, sorry for talking about sex at your vibrator party.
09:31It's bridal shower, you guys just made it dirty.
09:34I'm just saying.
09:35God, you are starting.
09:36And no, really, most women have a propensity towards bisexuality.
09:39Okay, that's misogynistic and not true.
09:42Oh, everybody shut the fuck up.
09:44Back me up here, V.
09:45Don't drag me into this.
09:47You dated that guy before, Brie?
09:49Um, for like a week.
09:50I'm just saying.
09:51Okay, really?
09:52Alright, this is Los Angeles and we're all grown-ups, okay?
09:55So whoever I might have fucked does not change the fact that I've only ever been in love with women
10:00and I'm only ever going to marry this one.
10:02Cheers.
10:05Sexuals are always trying to get you on their team.
10:07They are.
10:08I'm already on everybody's team.
10:10Alright, alright.
10:11Can we talk about literally anything else?
10:13Apparently not.
10:14There you are.
10:15Hey.
10:16Somebody else could do that.
10:17I know.
10:18I just, I kinda like scrubbing.
10:19Obviously.
10:20Come on.
10:21I think that's pretty clean.
10:22I still need to take this out.
10:23Come on.
10:24Just come with me a few minutes.
10:25There's no people here.
10:26Exactly.
10:27I don't think it's really the time.
10:30Do you actually know how long it's been?
10:31I don't know.
10:32What?
10:33What?
10:34What?
10:35What?
10:36What?
10:37What?
10:38What?
10:39What?
10:40What?
10:41What?
10:42What?
10:43What?
10:44What?
10:45What?
10:47What?
10:48What?
10:49What?
10:50What?
10:51I don't think it's really the time.
10:52Do you actually know how long it's been?
10:54What?
10:55What?
10:56What?
10:57Do you?
10:58Three months?
11:00Six.
11:01Shit.
11:03Yeah.
11:08Hey, hey, now, not until you're married.
11:14Hey, let me get that coffee.
11:16Thanks.
11:17Dump it back here.
11:24How did the two of you do it?
11:26What?
11:27Keep things so fresh.
11:29I mean, I don't want to sound like a stereotype,
11:31but Jamie and I were dead in the water after six months.
11:35Eight years, you know, you gotta stay inventive.
11:37In the bedroom?
11:38In everything.
11:40Didn't you guys have an open relationship for a while?
11:43Technically, we still do.
11:45I'll keep that in mind.
11:51This is taking forever.
11:53Yeah, this must be really uncomfortable for you.
11:56I'm so sorry that you have to suffer alone, Cal.
11:59I just don't understand it.
12:00I mean, how is this even medically possible?
12:02Well, apparently, certain people just never display symptoms.
12:06Great.
12:07Seriously?
12:08Are you serious?
12:10You're in an ist.
12:12It vibrated in my pocket.
12:13Shut up.
12:14I had no idea.
12:15I didn't.
12:16It's off.
12:17Put it on.
12:18Calvin F?
12:19I'm up.
12:20Oh, fuck me.
12:21Well, that's how you got into this mess in the first place now, isn't it?
12:38Can you confirm your date of birth?
12:39December 23rd, 1985.
12:41Aw, just a little baby.
12:42And you're experiencing symptoms?
12:45Yes.
12:46It's fucking awful.
12:48Well, don't worry.
12:49We'll run some tests and we'll get you treated today, okay?
12:52Great.
12:53Have you ever tested positive for HIV?
12:54No.
12:55When was the last time you had an HIV test?
12:58Six months ago.
13:00And how many sexual partners have you had in those six months?
13:04Eight.
13:05A nine.
13:06I think, no, ten.
13:07I think it's probably ten.
13:09Are we sticking with ten?
13:10Ten.
13:11Okay, let me erase eight and nine and leave it at ten.
13:13Have you performed oral sex?
13:15Yes.
13:16Have you received oral sex?
13:17Yes.
13:18Has there been rimming?
13:19Yes.
13:20Sounds like you're having a lot of fun.
13:21Do not feel shame.
13:23Would you call yourself a top or a bottom?
13:26These are all really personal questions.
13:29This is not a party.
13:31We're not having chit-chat.
13:32I'm filling out your STD profile, okay?
13:34Why don't you be honest with me?
13:36Let's take a deep breath.
13:38What do you call yourself?
13:40On the top or bottom spectrum?
13:43Just put first.
13:45It's not true, but put it.
13:48Now, it says here you do not want an HIV test.
13:51No, I don't think so.
13:54Maybe we should consider the HIV test.
13:56Okay, I mean, I guess if you think that.
13:59Yeah, I think it'd be a good idea.
14:01We're already doing the blood and the urine,
14:03and we're gonna do a rectal exam.
14:05Rectal exam?
14:06Your boyfriend's here, right?
14:07The one that's shitting blood?
14:08Yeah.
14:09So let's go with that rectal.
14:11Okay.
14:12We will get you treatment today as well.
14:16Do you use protection when you have sex?
14:18We do.
14:19We didn't used to, but we do now.
14:21My boyfriend's in the lobby.
14:22Oh, that's so romantic.
14:24It's nice partners coming to the STD clinic together.
14:27So let's start with the rapid HIV test, okay?
14:31I spend most of my day trying to get these child-sized gloves onto my hands.
14:36Okay, could you give me your fuck you finger, please?
14:43Let's turn the volume on that way down.
14:46Just gonna feel a little prick, okay?
14:48Which I can assure you is a sentence you will never hear me say outside of these four walls.
14:53Okay.
14:54Okay.
14:55That's good.
14:56I need a little cotton here.
14:59Just gonna be a minute.
15:05One dot.
15:06One dot?
15:07What does that mean?
15:08It means you did not have HIV.
15:09Congratulations.
15:10Would you like a card that says that?
15:12Actually, yeah, I would.
15:14Okay.
15:15Here, go fill this out.
15:17Sure.
15:24And then pee in this.
15:25Not here.
15:28Hey, Sue!
15:32Hi.
15:33Hi.
15:34You gonna go potty?
15:35I gotta pee.
15:36You ready?
15:37I guess so.
15:38Squeeze them out.
15:39Let's go.
15:40Good luck with that.
15:42There's a water fountain on the way from here.
15:43Let's see.
15:47Good game.
15:50Oh, God.
15:55Wow.
15:56Wow.
15:57You are...
15:58Yeah, I am.
15:59Oh, my God.
16:00You're a dirty little...
16:01Yeah, I am.
16:02That was...
16:03Seriously, that was probably the best.
16:04The best sex you ever had?
16:05Yes.
16:06Yeah, I know what I'm doing down there.
16:07I got a BFA.
16:08You got a BFA?
16:09Yeah, butt-fucking-award.
16:10From the academy.
16:12I got a talented boyfriend.
16:13Yeah, you do.
16:14Look at you.
16:15You're so smooth.
16:16You're like a slutty baby.
16:18I have to work tonight.
16:19Are you fetishizing me?
16:20Baby.
16:21Don't stop.
16:22I have a secret.
16:23I used to be into bears.
16:26Exclusively.
16:27I still am.
16:28Hey.
16:29Does it bother you that I'm not all like, rawr, woof, sup bro all the time?
16:37Because sometimes I get that it might be a problem for you.
16:42Ugh.
16:43No.
16:44Of course not.
16:45I mean, we could both, like, not be the center of attention all the time.
16:52Well, it's not my fault if I upstage you.
16:55I'm not worried about that.
16:56You've never upstaged me.
16:58So, are you saying you want to take turns being the man?
17:01Because I can...
17:02No.
17:03I don't...
17:04I'm always a man.
17:05Oh.
17:06Okay, Jess Bono.
17:07You're just the butches.
17:08I'm not a butch.
17:09I'm saying, like, we could not always be putting on a show.
17:14That's what I mean.
17:15That's what I mean.
17:16What?
17:20Are you accusing me of being dramatic?
17:22Possibly.
17:24Okay.
17:25Let me show you how to do that.
17:26It's all on the wrist.
17:27Do not tell me how to pop my wrist in my own home.
17:30I'll show you dramatic.
17:31Oh, yeah.
17:33Oh, no.
17:34The big, gross bear man's having his way with me.
17:36Yeah.
17:37Here, little boy.
17:38Oh, no.
17:39Stop, that's creepy.
17:40No, keep going, actually.
17:41Oh.
17:42Hey, Ian.
17:43It's Hillary.
17:44Hey, Ian.
17:45Hi, Ian.
17:47Um, I know I left you about 14 messages,
17:51but, um, you know, 15's the charm, you know?
17:55Just want to make sure you didn't fall or hurt yourself.
17:57I'm out, um, on the water.
17:59It's beautiful.
18:00You should totally come out.
18:01Can you call me back?
18:02Maybe you can meet me out.
18:03Because I've got an extra...
18:05an extra seat.
18:07Why are you calling me back?
18:08Like, you've never not answered your phone like this before.
18:11It's just, it's getting to be a bit much, you know?
18:13I mean, it's like, how am I supposed to take this?
18:15I mean, other than, like, the fact that, you know,
18:16you're just totally rejecting me.
18:21Jesus Christ.
18:24Jesus Christ.
18:26Hey, Ian.
18:27How are you?
18:28I know we haven't really talked much through.
18:30I don't know.
18:31It's been a couple hours.
18:33Hey, sis.
18:34Ian won't call me back.
18:35I'm done trying.
18:36How many messages have too many messages?
18:37One.
18:38Hillary.
18:39What are you up to?
18:40Can you make me some soup?
18:41Just sitting around.
18:42I'm at the doctor's office.
18:43Why?
18:44Routine physical.
18:45Aren't you fancy now that you have insurance?
18:46Huh?
18:47Oh, yeah.
18:48I'm fancy.
18:49Then why are you getting a physical?
18:50I'm getting tested, okay?
18:51You don't think that Tom is fooling around on you again, do you?
18:54Because I will fuck him up.
18:55No.
18:56Are you fooling around on him again?
18:57No.
18:58Then why are you getting a physical?
18:59I've got to go.
19:00They're calling me.
19:01I've got to go.
19:02We can put it on the fridge next to yours.
19:12I can't believe this is happening.
19:13Yeah, I know, Jared is the one.
19:15I know.
19:16And that Jared is the one.
19:17I can't believe.
19:19They're the one who's on the fridge next to yours.
19:22I can't believe this is happening.
19:25next to yours.
19:27I can't believe this is happening.
19:29Yeah, I know.
19:30And that Jared is the one that gave it to us.
19:32I mean, he has a master's degree.
19:34An MFA.
19:35Which is a master's degree.
19:36Still, fuck that guy.
19:39Or...
19:41You know, we could have given it to him.
19:44I mean, it's a possibility.
19:46It is a possibility.
19:49Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
19:51Don't do this. Don't do this.
19:55Just glad that we're here together.
19:58Of course.
20:00Mm.
20:01Hi.
20:02You guys into groups?
20:04Calvin F.
20:07Definitely.
20:12Oh, hi.
20:14Right this way.
20:25I don't know what I'm supposed to think.
20:30I mean, she's never home.
20:31I go by her office at lunch and she's not there.
20:33I mean, where the hell is she?
20:34Well, maybe she's at lunch.
20:36Why don't you just ask her?
20:37Because then she might tell me.
20:40Is that him?
20:41Yep.
20:42Answer it.
20:43No.
20:44He's a clinger.
20:45A what?
20:46He's clingy.
20:47He's cling wrap.
20:48He's like an octopus.
20:49You're a lesbian.
20:50You wouldn't understand.
20:51Because he likes you.
20:52You don't seriously think that she's cheating on you, do you?
20:55And technically, is it even possible for her to cheat?
20:57Yes.
20:58If we don't talk about it, yes.
21:00And...
21:01I don't know.
21:02There's nothing suspicious on her phone.
21:04You checked her phone?
21:05Yes, absolutely.
21:06You're like the NSA.
21:07You're crazy.
21:08Crazy.
21:09Says the guy who was dating a married man for three months.
21:12Technically, he wasn't married.
21:14You slept with both of them, didn't you?
21:16Don't be mean.
21:19Now he's texting me.
21:21See, this is exactly what I'm talking about.
21:23Nobody actually knows each other.
21:25We're all just wandering around in life.
21:28That guy Derek probably thinks that you're actually a really nice guy.
21:31Okay, you're high and you're crazy.
21:33So stop philosophizing.
21:35I'm not philosophizing.
21:36I have something to show you.
21:43I'm not crazy.
21:49I've been using the running app on her phone to track her movements.
21:53And she hasn't noticed?
21:54She hasn't noticed.
21:55She goes running three times a week and when she's in the shower,
21:58I look at the room from the last time and then I log in on the board.
22:01Yep.
22:02Nothing crazy about this.
22:03Yeah.
22:04She's going to the same residential address over and over again.
22:07Uh-oh.
22:09Maybe she has another family.
22:11Shut up.
22:12What am I supposed to do?
22:17Hi.
22:18Hi.
22:19Hi.
22:20You haven't been answering my calls.
22:21Yeah, I've sort of been seeing someone.
22:22So?
22:23I just thought...
22:24I don't know.
22:25It's really none of my business, is it?
22:26I guess not.
22:27Why did you call me?
22:28Maybe I'm sick of being such a nice guy.
22:29Maybe I'm sick of being such a nice guy.
22:30Please.
22:31You're a puppy dog.
22:32I mean, why did you call me?
22:33It's against the rules.
22:34I am not a puppy dog.
22:35I am not a puppy dog.
22:36I am a full grown dog.
22:37A mean one.
22:38Yes.
22:39You're a pit bull.
22:40Don't you ever call me again.
22:41Do you understand?
22:42Okay.
22:43Can I have your date of birth?
22:44December 23rd, 1985.
22:45Great.
22:46So just lie down on the table and pull your pants down.
22:48I'm not a puppy dog.
22:49I'm not a puppy dog.
22:50I'm not a puppy dog.
22:51I'm not a puppy dog.
22:52I'm a full grown dog.
22:53I'm a mean one.
22:54Yes.
22:55You're a pit bull.
22:56Don't you ever call me again.
22:58Do you understand?
22:59Okay.
23:06Can I have your date of birth?
23:07December 23rd, 1985.
23:09Great.
23:10So just lie down on the table and pull your pants down.
23:12Okay.
23:13So I'm just going to do a little 360 degree turn.
23:33Yeah.
23:35There's definitely some irritation.
23:38Okay.
23:39Here we go.
23:40Okay.
23:41Uh, have you performed oral sex?
23:45Yes.
23:46Have you received oral sex?
23:48Yes.
23:49Rimming?
23:50Depends on the situation.
23:52Are you typically a top or a bottom?
23:55You could have found all this stuff out on my profile in case you forgot.
23:58That's very funny because your boyfriend actually said the same thing.
24:02They're both really clever.
24:04We're going to treat you for gonorrhea, chlamydia and syphilis today.
24:08All three, huh?
24:09Well, no.
24:10I mean, it's probably only one of the three, but we won't know for sure until we get your
24:14test results back and we don't want you to live like this.
24:18No.
24:19Oh.
24:20Have you considered going on prep?
24:22No, not really.
24:24Maybe you should, you know, think about that because you are at a higher risk for HIV.
24:29Why?
24:30Because I'm gay?
24:31No, because you're, you know, you're slutty.
24:40Well, I would have, but my insurance sucks.
24:44Well, I suppose that's why you're here.
24:49Uh, make sure that you don't have sex for a week.
24:52What?
24:53I've been working for three days.
24:54Seriously?
24:55Well, typically it's actually a week, but I figured you couldn't make it that far.
25:00No.
25:01Make sure you fill out this form if you want to inform any of your past partners anonymously.
25:06I totally would have.
25:09Oh, yeah.
25:10You didn't even make that face at me.
25:13I wasn't making a face.
25:16Do we need to notify you or...?
25:19I think that this is considered a notification right now.
25:22Probably.
25:23I'm sorry.
25:25Are you also going to ask me all about my sexual history?
25:28No, I got it all right here in the form.
25:31You stand up and bend over for me.
25:35All right, there are two shots.
25:38One in each buttock.
25:39Okay?
25:40Pull down your pants and give me your left cheek first.
25:42This is going to hurt a lot.
25:43Okay?
25:44It's going to be sore for a couple days after.
25:46All right?
25:47And it's thick like a lotion.
25:48So after I put it in, I'm going to have to rub it for a while.
25:51Okay.
25:52Okay?
25:53You ready?
25:54There you go.
25:57Okay.
25:58So what do you do?
26:00I'm a photographer.
26:02You're a photographer?
26:03What do you take pictures of?
26:05You know Ann Gedds?
26:06Yeah.
26:07She takes pictures of the babies and the flowers.
26:09I like that stuff.
26:11You know?
26:12It's calming.
26:13Just a baby and a flower.
26:14You know what I mean?
26:15Like a newborn baby and a flower.
26:16I don't know.
26:17Yeah.
26:18I wonder what she gets the babies.
26:19Wait, where did she get the flowers that big?
26:20You know what I mean?
26:21Oh!
26:22Thanks for indulging me.
26:23On the shower.
26:24I know it's not really your thing.
26:27Sure.
26:28It's just that we got married so matter-of-factly, you know.
26:32You just kind of wanted something.
26:33What?
26:34I don't know, something more real.
26:39I mean, you're basically my life.
26:57I mean, you're basically my life, we have kids together, I guess it's as real as it gets, but...
27:04Where's the fanfare, you know?
27:11Do you want a white wedding?
27:14Oh, God, no. I'd rather redo the kitchen.
27:27I mean, are we different?
27:33No.
27:36Why should we be?
27:48Sorry we haven't been in the same schedule lately.
27:51Me too.
27:57You want to try one right now?
28:03Um, maybe tomorrow.
28:06I'm pretty exhausted from the party.
28:13You could just lay there and I can do everything.
28:27Sounds nice.
28:32Okay.
28:33All right.
29:03All right.
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