00:00Whatever Darnell Wright doesn't know, he's confident about one thing.
00:04He's a five mother f***er.
00:06Now, Darnell is a bona fide, proud, unrelenting womanizer who is convinced that every woman's happiness lies in between his legs.
00:13He's a bit of a jezen.
00:15Now, Darnell and his friend T have just been promoted as business partners in a hot night club called Chocolate City, which is weird because it's in L.A.
00:22Nonetheless, Darnell's life is on the up and up.
00:24And that's why he felt it was perfectly fine to play childhood mind games with the lovely, successful real estate tycoon, Brandy Webb.
00:31And when the tried and true good old fashioned street sexual harassment, I mean, cat calling doesn't work on this highly evolved goddess of a human being.
00:38Darnell resorts to doing what us guys do best when we're trying to GTD, lie like a panda after a bamboo ultimate feast.
00:45So he invites Brandy to the reopening of Chocolate City because the service there is five star stellar.
00:50I'll be sitting at my bar just sitting there, make room for the drunk muck.
00:53And as if he's playing the weird game of whore chess with himself, he invites every woman he's Chinooking to be there.
00:59And it's shocked that Brandy Webb graced the club with her presence.
01:02And I say grace because whenever someone has Shatner lighting, also known as Ibar, like this, you know that person is not to be f***ed with.
01:10Damn, I told myself I wouldn't curse this breakdown, but sh**.
01:12And speaking of caca, the not so vigorously douchebagged dude make a bet that Darnell would, um, hold on, this is the mid-90s, so let me get the correct verbiage.
01:20Ah, here it is.
01:21Hit those skins or knock Brandy's boots before, I don't know, midnight or something.
01:26It's like a really f***ed up version of Cinderella.
01:28F***ing Cinderella.
01:29I don't give a f*** if she lose a glass slipper.
01:31But in walks Darnell's long-time love, the gorgeous Mia Williams.
01:35Mia is the woman that got away and turns out to be the backstory as to why no woman can measure up to Darnell's mother besides the moral and cooler than the other side of the pillow, Mia.
01:44But instead of pursuing a healthy relationship with Mia, he's got a bet to win.
01:49This motherf***ing horseback rider ain't got no damn business horseback riding.
01:52He's showing up at her workplace, ain't got no business being there.
01:55Until Brandy opens up to him and tells him why she's not to be f***ed with.
02:01Because I cannot be hurt.
02:04And he's all like, alright baby, I love you.
02:06However, Brandy failed to mention what happened to the last man who played games with her heart.
02:11Oh yeah, she cancelled his life subscription, then went out to eat to celebrate his unaliveness.
02:15No biggie.
02:16Darnell calls T to glow.
02:18He's won the bet.
02:19But Brandy doesn't know anything about no bet.
02:21And she thinks she's found her king.
02:23But instead of T'Challa, she got burger.
02:25Yep, Darnell has gotten all he needs out of Brandy, which is two words that start with butt and rhymes with meat.
02:30So Darnell's like, thanks for the ass, baby.
02:32See you never.
02:32And Brandy's like, oh, on second thought, I wouldn't mind seeing this n***a electrocuted.
02:36Oh hey, after, I'll treat myself to some pineapple slices.
02:38So Brandy takes a page out of the Fatal Attraction book.
02:41What are you doing here, Brandy?
02:42Good morning.
02:43And gets her doing proper from his ass.
02:46Move it.
02:49But his friends T and Mia save Darnell.
02:52He wakes up in the hospital and gets to repair his relationship with Mia and have a happy life.
02:56And Brandy ends up in the mental hospital jail or something.
03:00Moral of the story, lie down with dogs, you're going to get f***ed over.
03:03I don't know, the movie is written by a guy.
03:05So yeah, the end.
03:06And follow for more.
03:06If you enjoyed this review, I have way more fun on my YouTube channel.
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