Dave, Doni, and Doni's Dog

Beasley Digital

8 months ago

Transcript

00:00Dave, I have a vocabulary question for you.

00:03Vocabulary?

00:04Yes.

00:05Do you know what a prepuce is?

00:06Say it again.

00:08Prepuce.

00:09I do not.

00:10I did not either until I read the box on my dog's medication and I was like, wish I'd

00:16known this word a long time ago so I could stop saying stuff like, so there's a problem

00:21with his, you know, the pink part, like inside of his junk.

00:26Like I'm talking to the vet like this because I didn't know about the word prepuce.

00:31My dog Biscuit is a small dog and I was like, hey, I feel like that's sticking out a little

00:37bit and it's not going back in.

00:39So this is on like Friday going into 4th of July weekend when this started.

00:43So I call the vet and then they're like, oh, we can't get them in.

00:46You're going to have to take them to an emergency clinic.

00:48Well, I have one already.

00:50So I called them and they were like, okay, you know, here's what you need to do.

00:55So you need to get some lube and you need to help work it back in.

01:01So a prepuce is a dog's ding dong.

01:05Yes, but like the inner part that just pops out on occasion, right?

01:09So we're talking about the full on the red rocket.

01:11The thing that looks like a lipstick.

01:13Yes, the lipstick is the prepuce.

01:16So they informed me that on my Friday night I can go get some lube.

01:22And I was like, are you talking about like a vino hand lotion?

01:25And they're like, no, not.

01:28All right.

01:28So I'm a little foggy today.

01:31No, I like I had a cup.

01:33I had a few beers last night.

01:35So like the whole beginning of this conversation, I was only like 50% there.

01:41Okay.

01:41So now I have your full attention.

01:43Yes.

01:45So a dog's prepuce is his dog ding dong.

01:49And that's the thing that sticks out of.

01:51Correct.

01:52Thank you for the visual.

01:53Sticky out.

01:53Yes.

01:54Right.

01:55Right.

01:55Okay.

01:56So your dog biscuit.

01:58Right.

01:59His ding dong stuck out.

02:01Yes.

02:01And wouldn't go back in.

02:03Not fully.

02:04Just a little bit.

02:04So he had a stuck out doggy ding dong.

02:06Yes.

02:07So like how long, like 10 minutes or like 10 hours?

02:10No, for, for probably it was closer to a day when I was like that thing, he's been messing

02:15with it and that thing hasn't gone back in.

02:17And then I got worried because I was like, I would think it could dry out.

02:19Like it's supposed to stay moist and tucked away and it's not so gross, but you're right.

02:24But no, I, they go out and then they come back in.

02:27I don't know why they go out.

02:28Right.

02:29Well, they go out for the same reason that the stork visits people.

02:33You know what I'm saying?

02:34And like, that's, that's part of their mating process.

02:38That's why that comes out.

02:39I only had female dogs.

02:41Right.

02:41So Lloyd was a boy, but that's another story.

02:46Lloyd was a girl, but that's another story.

02:48That's another story.

02:49He was still a good boy.

02:50Okay.

02:51So may I tell you, Dave, I did not know for years that Dave's dog was actually female.

02:56Lloyd.

02:56He's a good boy.

02:57Sorry.

02:58Okay.

02:58But that's okay.

02:58That's another story.

02:59It's another story.

03:00Okay.

03:00So, okay.

03:02So I'm very interested in this.

03:03Right.

03:04So your dog's ding dong, lupus, what's it called?

03:08Prupus?

03:09Now I'm prepuce.

03:11Your dog's prepuce is stuck out and it won't go back in.

03:14Correct.

03:14So you call the vet and they say, we were closed or we can't help you or we're busy.

03:17They say to either, like, I'm going to have to bring him in.

03:20They're like, is he still, you know, urinating?

03:22And I'm like, yes.

03:23And it doesn't seem to be hurting him any, but I'm concerned about his prepuce, like drying

03:27out.

03:27That can't be good.

03:28That doesn't normally happen.

03:29And so they tell me I need to get some lube, not hand lotion, straight up lube.

03:34Like the lady was seriously like, nope, I'm talking about, do you have any KY?

03:38And you need to try and work it back in there.

03:42So I had already looked it up on the internet because I was like, what the hell?

03:45Did they ask you if you had any KY?

03:47They did.

03:48That's like straight from the conversation.

03:50Did you say like, you bet.

03:51I got KY.

03:52Buckets.

03:53KY.

03:53I got KY advanced.

03:55Or like, I got super primo double, double ply KY.

03:59Right?

03:59You just don't know.

04:01So.

04:01My goodness.

04:02So, yeah, so.

04:03I can't believe like a veterinarian or somebody at the clinic asked you if you had any KY.

04:08Right now, there is a tube of KY in my side table next to my couch because I've been having

04:13to use that on my dog's prepuce.

04:16So.

04:17Okay.

04:17So they want you to go.

04:19I mean, sure, it sounds kind of gross and kind of sick and kind of disgusting, but.

04:24But it's your dog and you love your dog.

04:26Yes.

04:27And you have, it's like if it was a child.

04:28No matter how gross, disgusting or sick it may seem, it's a medical issue, whether human

04:34or dog.

04:34Yeah.

04:35And you need to help your dog.

04:36Yes.

04:36So I totally get it.

04:37And I would do anything to help my dog, Lloyd, or anybody's dog.

04:42So I get it.

04:43It's probably just not the most pleasant thing you ever had to do, but you had to do it.

04:48Fun.

04:48No, but I did.

04:49So I did do it.

04:51Yes.

04:51And did it work?

04:52So not, not the first time.

04:55So I got it somewhat in and then I had to do it again the next morning and I was able

05:02to get the rest of the way in, but then it poked back out again because he started looking

05:07at it and I was like, listen, buddy, this is not going to become a thing.

05:09So I got it back in a third time and then I stuck a donut.

05:14They have these blow up donuts instead of cones.

05:15They have blow up donuts.

05:16So we stuck a donut on his neck and that has helped out with the situation.

05:22But then it started doing it again and this time I noticed like a little pink patch on

05:26his belly.

05:26So I had to, I full on took him to the vet.

05:28Now he's on like steroids and antibiotics just to be on the safe side.

05:32And then there's a different ointment that has to be handled the same way.

05:37Like all I do is put stuff on my dog's lipstick and then wash my hands for like 10 minutes.

05:42The birthday song is not getting it done.

05:44I've never heard of that before.

05:46I've always had female dogs.

05:48I'm sure it's probably a relatively common problem with male dogs.

05:51I talked to my sister and she's like, what?

05:54We've had male dogs.

05:56Like our last two dogs have been male dogs.

05:57We've never had that problem.

05:59And I'm like, just lucky.

06:01Like according to the internet, trust me, if you Google it, there are a lot of dogs and

06:04it could have been worse because some of them I was like, I did not know it could extend

06:08that far.

06:09So at least there's that going for me.

06:11But I am like, I think I'm just going to get female dogs from now on.

06:15Is there any drugs or like, you know, like anti Viagra or like, uh, like, you know how

06:20they go, like they, you know, we play those commercials and they're like, side effects

06:24may include nausea, dehydration and, uh, extended.

06:29No, what, no.

06:29What's the erection erectional or what's it called?

06:32Erection dysfunction.

06:34Yes.

06:34Whatever.

06:34Yeah.

06:34But maybe there's dog pills that cause dog erection dysfunction.

06:38So I don't know, but the, one of the, they also gave me a third medication and it's like

06:42a sedative that helps lower his blood pressure, thus lowering the chances of him having, but

06:51I don't know that it was like erection based.

06:53You know what I mean?

06:54I don't, I don't like, he wasn't like running around, like, you know, and he's fixed to

06:58boot.

06:58So.

06:59So is he doing okay now?

07:00Is he doing better now?

07:01He's doing better.

07:02Cause I don't like sad dog stories.

07:03I know.

07:04Me either.

07:04Sometimes you have to go through a sad dog story to get to the end and the happy dog.

07:07Right.

07:08So are we close to the happy dog story ending?

07:10We are hoping for a happy ending.

07:12Okay.

07:13Oh my goodness.

07:14I gotta go.

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