Felony Ham Heist

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a woman in Ohio who has been charged with a felony after she was caught stealing over $9,000 worth of deli meats from the grocery store where she worked.

Transcript

00:00so a grocery store employee at bolivar ohio with a hankering for lunch meat is facing felony

00:11theft charges i assume she's a bigger lady okay how much lunch meat dollar wise do you think this

00:21woman managed to eat managed to eat eat eat uh how much is like lunch meat is cheap right out of it

00:32because i've been in i know this story i already know the story too well let okay break it down

00:37this way say like a package of lunch meat is we'll just say it's like four bucks okay i'm gonna give

00:42you it was mainly ham but a little bit of salami too but mainly ham an insane amount 250 bucks

00:519 200 i just can't stop once i pop ham ma'am where's our all of our hams well i think you

01:04can tell by the glistening face i have i understand you got into some ham but ma'am we had nine

01:15thousand dollars worth of ham and 250 dollars worth of salami it's not here anymore where

01:22where is it i told you months ago that i could not be dressed around the ham let alone the salami

01:28problem i got that's that's god i'm just starting to dip my toe in the salami game i get it so you

01:34took our ham where is the ham so i didn't take your ham no i i dined on your ham for months and

01:42months and i've been eating ham since i started here oh and that's it oh so so bit by bit i thought

01:50it was a one time i thought it was one time for a long period of time ham's been going missing at

01:57this giant eagle store in ohio i'm as confused as you guys are we're not as confused i don't know

02:06who would have taken you know you really you got some honey glaze on your face do i yeah i'm as

02:12confused as you guys are i don't know where it is you smell like ham well that's just my natural

02:19i just don't seem to say that about me go eat a rice cake well that's genetically different from

02:37pigs so of course i smell like ham you and your pilates yeah why don't you go do some kind of

02:45yoga pose rice cake chick first to point your long slender fingers

02:50yeah don't just squish you with my salsa chance so um they finally realized they'd been missing

02:59ham for a long time oh man and um when they questioned her she admitted yes she had been

03:05eating ham every day after eight years look i'm gonna shoot straight eight years eight years

03:12i've been living this long because i feel better it feels so much better get this off my shoulders

03:18i knew it was like 25 000 pounds of ham just weighing down on me i couldn't believe i got away

03:24with it as long as i did no one noticed i got to four thousand dollars worth of ham and i just said

03:32oh they must not care they must just not care they didn't and they obviously didn't i'm like

03:40where are you guys have you seen all of the ham some beast must have wandered in off the streets

03:47oh my god you're right just don't throw it off with several loaves of it she admitted she'd been

03:53eating slices and slices of ham every day for eight years and she also dipped into salami too

03:59so she would have the ham maybe just just cut off like a couple little slices

04:05yeah one for me yeah i ate one slice of ham every minute for the last 20 years of my employment

04:11so excuse me sir you wanted uh one pound of ham so it's one pound of ham for you so half a pound

04:20for me you got insider tip someone else gay sold her down the river probably your skinny bitch

04:27co-worker yeah exactly i know it was you bitch listen you and i are the only ones in the ham room

04:33i know you fingered me

04:35um so she admitted to the theft late friday after questioning from the loss prevention manager

04:45how they calculated so sure that it wasn't that skinny bitch you ate nine thousand dollars worth of

04:51ham oh she's a vegan sir she's never touched the ham jeez she's not even uh around the ham ma'am oh man

04:58so um they calculated that to be worth about ninety two hundred dollars and um because it was a high

05:06amount she's been charged with felony theft before i knew it i just got in too deep sometimes you go

05:12all in on ham sometimes you win sometimes you lose does she go to prison for this what's felony

05:18theft yeah like you're in prison for ham yeah what are you in here for what do you think i'm in here

05:23for i don't know i'm in here for the ham heist of the century

05:26ham heist of the century it is though it is it really it kind of is she ate 1900 pounds

05:37got away with two full pigs under the radar too

05:41nine years

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