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  • 5 years ago
Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a new app that helps users pick the perfect shade of lipstick by matching it with their nipple color and James downloads it to see his results.

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Fun
Transcript
00:00all right ladies listen up here you may not have been picking your lipstick correctly
00:10because they say if you want the perfect lipstick for you match your nipple cover
00:16color cover color color match the color of your nipples yeah because it's like you're
00:22like the natural skin tone lips or something nipples and lipstick beauty magazines have
00:29tried it out the majority of people saying it works i must have heard this somewhere because i
00:36knew that it was going to be nipples and lipstick nipples and lipstick so i don't know i want to go
00:42to a makeup store and lift up my shirt what's your shade oh my god james would be thrown out so fast
00:56it would be amazing to watch yeah well when lisa said the lips and the nipples are the same color
01:00i thought we did a story saying that the lips and the nipples well we did the gums and the girl part
01:06oh maybe that's what it was yeah we did that yeah the girl's gums are the same color as their insides
01:12i think the inside makes sense because it's just made of the same stuff as your butthole too
01:16i'm sorry what the inside of your mouth is uh same tissue as as your butt as your butthole
01:23nice
01:24you're just dropping tons of science
01:28that's the way that you just answered that like you were being like in your courtroom
01:34say it again
01:37for the court
01:39ladies and gentlemen of the tree it's the same color as
01:43that's the same material your lips and gums and stuff
01:48wait a second what you're saying let me just get this for the record
01:50the same color as girls bits yes well and then the same material yes your inside of your mouth
01:58is the same material as your butthole a black listener said uh that doesn't apply to black
02:04people oh man nipple and lipstick thing doesn't apply to black people so what what are you supposed
02:09to do if you're black dave i have no idea chuck damn it i've not looked into it before you need
02:13the answers but anyway this woman that made this discovery she actually invented an app for this
02:17called nip lips um they scan you scan your nip download it right now james it's a color matching
02:24app you scan your nip and it matches the right color for you can we look up uh black girls nipples
02:30well i guess we can um no because i just what why isn't it work i have to know why it's not working
02:37i think they really botched the name of this app too they could have called it nipples
02:42you don't like nip lips okay let's take a look here i'm just trying to see
02:50we've got some black lady nipples
02:55oh my god if you search black lady nipples you get some graphic images as one might expect but
03:07well they're okay let's see if we can oh my god wow nipples and a dick uh yeah i wish i could see
03:19yeah like so that example right yeah so there's the nips and there's the lips
03:22they are so what they're saying is in this case that she should be wearing like a darker shade
03:29obviously you want to download the app which we don't suggest because they're probably just
03:33saving pictures of your nipples yeah they're saving those nipples they wait a second you don't put
03:40your nipples in this app that's what this app's all about yeah this nip lips yeah i've just signed
03:44in created account i'm about to scan my nipple and see what the color is telling me oh nice james nipples
03:48on nipples yes thank you james thank you james we've got a guy named james we now have a database filled
03:55with american nipples his perfect plan he's doing it he's doing it oh my god he is look oh he's
04:03zooming right in is his light on his light is on too he's giving it a good flash of course yeah you
04:08need a you need it to be well lit it's analyzing my nipple right now oh okay let's see what color
04:13will it tell you a name okay according to my scan yeah desert matte botanical desert matte botanical
04:21is the color of your nipple does it give a brand so they're suggesting i should go with a mesquite
04:25bean a tequila sunrise or a burnt adobe those are the three matches compared to my nipple scan
04:32and is it a lipstick company i'll show you i'll show you the colors because you can see the colors
04:38right here on the phone look at that yeah they're quite dark quite dark yeah i love it let's see what
04:44we got here it's very nice i already know the colors but let me see so that's the color the
04:49same my nipple would be and these are the colors they're recommending i use what's the where's the
04:54color that your nip is the top oh the top yeah it's quite dark yeah he has dark nipples you got
04:59some dark nips yeah he has dark nipples very mine is tall dark and handsome handsome yeah i'm
05:05definitely pinker than searching cactuses that's what comes up when i touch in the name of that color
05:11my favorite would be the tequila sunrise tequila sunrise you want to see what's the tequila sunrise
05:17yeah a little red looks like an old lady took over our computer
05:22black nipples and then they went to desert matte botanical color i wonder if it can tell that it's
05:38a nipple or if you took a picture of your lips if it would it would just match to the color
05:42whatever it's probably like my ball sack if i scan the color of my ball sack yeah like what
05:47what's the perfect match does your ball sack and your nipples the same color
05:50no i would say no no different colors no different colors
05:55what else you want to know what else i don't mean i didn't mean to ask you specifically i just was
06:03putting it out there as a question like i was just asking the world not just you chuck what else you
06:08want to know that was awesome yeah i don't know what color my taint is he answered honestly
06:15with conviction yeah you know i didn't i didn't mean sorry my nipples and my balls are different
06:23colors dave perfect man shade is the color of your sack
06:28have you ever had a man ask you that before never in my life not till now at least
06:36not till now but you know what i knew who the guy would be i knew it would be dave
06:46you get dave long enough and he's gonna ask you the color of your sack
06:51have you ever had a man ask you that you know what i bet i go my whole life and never i've never
07:04asked again i'm sure you're right i never even thought about it before that moment
07:09that's a funny that's a funny day at work i was asked today if my balls and my nipples matched
07:14by my cohort
07:17maybe that's the new does the curtains match the carpet
07:22yeah exactly
07:23yeah i answered honestly oh shoot

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