If LinkedIn Was Honest

Are you ready to become Dull Corp's next spreadsheet donkey?  #shorts #linkedin #jobsearch #jobs #funny #comedy #parody #youtubeshorts

Transcript

00:00Go ahead, type in your dream job.

00:04Project manager.

00:07Whoa, dream big.

00:10Hello, applicant. How would you like to be

00:13Dullcorp's next corporate spreadsheet donkey?

00:16I want to be a project manager. Who is she?

00:19This is how I make money.

00:21Desperate hiring managers pay me to show

00:24dead-end jobs to unqualified losers,

00:27which reminds me,

00:33I could show you better job listings

00:36for 300 face pages a month.

00:39I don't have any face pages. That's why I'm here.

00:42Well then, let's hear the woman out.

00:45Oh yes, very exciting.

00:47Entry-level job opening, requirements,

00:4930 years of experience, five Super Bowl rings,

00:52supernatural powers beyond human comprehension,

00:55proficiency in Excel, obviously,

00:57and the base pay is $15,000 to $500,000,

01:01depending on experience.

01:02I don't think I'm Dullcorp material.

01:05Now's not the time to be picky, donkey boy.

01:08Statistically, you'll need to apply to 200 jobs

01:11before this nightmare can end.

01:13Fine.