- 1 year ago
El Presidente | Stool Scenes
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00:00Oh, Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree.
00:04Well, you know, it's the holiday season,
00:06and, you know, the presents are already starting to arrive.
00:09Look at this.
00:10Ah, I think everyone else is away today,
00:13but I'm the only one here from the Mets aliens.
00:15It says,
00:17two Mets aliens from SC.
00:21You know, could be Santa Claus,
00:23or I know somebody else has the initials SC.
00:26So let's see what we got.
00:29Uh-oh.
00:32Oh, look, it's Juan Soto.
00:41Yes, I think this is what Mets fans all wanted.
00:49We were at dinner.
00:50Me and Clemmer and Tommy all saw the news,
00:52and we all reacted.
00:54Me and Clemmer ran out to a restaurant.
00:56That's when you saw the video of Clemmer
00:58running down the streets like a maniac,
00:59being like, we got Juan Soto, we got Ted Williams, and...
01:02Juan Soto, 765.
01:06765, 15 years.
01:09Unbelievable.
01:10Cohen steps up.
01:12Uncle Stevie steps up.
01:14The Mets got Juan Soto.
01:16We got Ted Williams.
01:24This is a dream.
01:25This is a dream.
01:26We got Ted Williams.
01:27We got Juan Soto.
01:28Oh, my God.
01:31Phil is tedious right now.
01:33We just found out the news.
01:34We hugged him and hugged Phil again.
01:36Oh, God.
01:37What do you think?
01:38Tell Phil.
01:39We got Juan Soto.
01:44Did you see the Clemmer video?
01:46Yeah, that freaked me out.
01:48That literally was like, that is my...
01:50My video was like, you went to go be fans,
01:53like, the fans of Sewer Rats,
01:55and if I signed 750 and saw that,
01:58reverse it.
01:59Look, look.
02:00That's what I would reverse it.
02:02If Juan Soto saw that, I would reverse it.
02:05The video was great.
02:06Excitement.
02:07You also...
02:08Me, it fucked you.
02:10Why?
02:11Because you started off going this,
02:12and you stop it.
02:13Okay, go, go, go.
02:14No, I was like, are we on?
02:15Are we on?
02:16I don't know why he didn't edit.
02:17And then after he posted it, I didn't watch it.
02:18I'm like, probably shouldn't watch it.
02:20He fucked you.
02:22I go all genuine.
02:23People think I'm lying.
02:24I wasn't.
02:25I was that excited.
02:26I mean, it's the biggest reason signing in 25 years.
02:28By any team.
02:29It's a big deal.
02:30And you kept saying that Soto was going to go to the Yankees.
02:32That's why I was so surprised.
02:34You kept telling me it's done.
02:35No, he's had a good pitching set.
02:37So what happened?
02:38Why didn't he go to the...
02:39You kept telling him he was going to go to the Yankees.
02:40I'm like, what happened?
02:41What do you mean?
02:42You have a crooked criminal owner
02:45who should be in jail.
02:47You got George Starks?
02:48Starks was actually convicted.
02:49He's dead.
02:50Did you believe that?
02:51That's disgusting.
02:52That's disgusting.
02:53Oh my God.
02:54I had it broken to me from Meek.
02:56Just sitting across the table being like, it happened.
02:58Him and Klemmer ran outside hugging each other.
03:01A couple of soy boys.
03:05It happened.
03:06Oh my God.
03:07It happened.
03:08And then Klemmer's running around.
03:09His hair looks like he just got electrocuted.
03:10But I'm glad he's gone.
03:12Well, and Soto's a mercenary.
03:14He's not a team guy.
03:15And the Yankees are going to build a better roster without him.
03:17We already got Max Friedman.
03:18We're going to get Kyle Tucker, Cody Ballinger.
03:20So Meek, Tommy Smokes, myself, Casey Smith, and Sidney.
03:25We're doing Rat Race.
03:26And Meek gets the alert.
03:28Meek and I freak out.
03:30Running on the streets.
03:31I'm still, we get this guy 15 years.
03:33There's no opt-outs.
03:35To have the Mets have a guy like this.
03:36He's going to break every team record.
03:38He's going to the Hall of Fame wearing a Mets hat.
03:39This is incredible.
03:41It's the biggest freezing signing in 20 years.
03:43He's on my team.
03:44But your actual video.
03:46Yes.
03:47What was the response to it?
03:48Some people liked it.
03:49Some people didn't.
03:50Witt didn't like it.
03:51I don't care what the response was.
03:52I was happy.
03:53I had fun.
03:54The Mets got the biggest freezing in 20 years.
03:56If you're not excited about that, then why do you watch sports?
03:58It's a night I'll never forget for multiple reasons.
04:00Happy we got one Soto.
04:01Happy Tommy was sad that night.
04:02Seeing his reaction was something.
04:04Yeah, tell me about Tommy.
04:06Well, after we came back to the restaurant,
04:08Tommy was like, I got to go make my video now.
04:10And it was a very depressing video for him.
04:12I don't think it fully set in for him yet.
04:14Might in a few days.
04:15All right.
04:16Well, Juan Soto to the Mets.
04:19That's not bad enough.
04:21I had that news break to me while at dinner with Meek, Phil, and Clemmer.
04:26In New Orleans.
04:28So that's unfortunate.
04:31I think we were pretty respectful.
04:33He was kind of down.
04:34But Meek and I didn't rub it in his face too bad.
04:37I don't think.
04:38I think we actually were pretty decent.
04:39Fuck Juan Soto.
04:40Money hungry, greedy piece of shit.
04:43Hope he has a terrible career.
04:44I will be rooting for injuries.
04:46Fuck Scott Boris.
04:48Fuck Steve Cohen.
04:49Shouldn't even be allowed to own a team, quite frankly.
04:51Largest SEC fine in history.
04:54Tommy Smokes is out there wishing that he'd die.
04:57Practically.
04:58Tommy Smokes is feeling it right now.
05:00I'm not going to really blame Hal.
05:02Like, if you're right there, then, you know,
05:04you blame Juan Soto for being a money hungry piece of shit.
05:07If that's the case and he just chose the Mets for a fucking extra $10 million,
05:11then he's a piece of shit.
05:12I hate him.
05:13It's too much money for a guy who's going to be DH-ing in six years anyway.
05:17We've got to go get a bunch of other players now.
05:19I hope Juan Soto has a terrible career.
05:22I hate him.
05:23What was your reaction last night?
05:26Were you awake for it?
05:27Well, let me tell you.
05:28I was at the Devils game, and I saw a tweet from Andy Martino
05:32who said that he's going to the Dodgers 15 years, 750, heavily back-loaded.
05:40This is only after reporting on Saturday night that Soto of the Mets is nearly dead.
05:46And he says, he goes,
05:48this is the problem, the Mets just aren't the place, a star destination.
05:52And that's the Mets Francis had to start dealing with.
05:56It's hard to believe this guy actually works for SNY.
05:59And then what happened?
06:00Yeah, so he's asking you what your reaction is to Juan Soto,
06:03and you're just going after Andy Martino.
06:04Well, I actually tweeted, well, there it is.
06:07And then the tweet got deleted.
06:10Devils lost.
06:11He texted me, Soto to Mets, and then that your order got fucked up at the diner.
06:16Then I went to a diner after a Mets game.
06:19I was pretty upset.
06:20I was at a concert last night when I found out.
06:22Some guy came up to me and in my ear was like,
06:25Juan Soto just signed with the Mets.
06:28And I was like, just now?
06:30He was like, just now?
06:32And I was like, are you serious?
06:33Are you fucking with me?
06:35He's like, I'm serious.
06:36I'm going to kill myself.
06:39And then I had to check.
06:40That's how I found out.
06:41I was pretty upset.
06:43He was never that good.
06:44Well, I ordered a plain hamburger with fries,
06:48and this guy comes out there with it dripping from cheese.
06:53But what about Soto?
06:54I think it's great.
06:55I think this is the anniversary of Gary Carter, 40 years,
06:59and I think it's the same impact on the Mets.
07:02Today sucks, no doubt.
07:04It's 50-50 the whole way.
07:05I feel like Yankees-Mets, if you think the Red Sox had a chance, Blue Jays, no.
07:09It was always those two teams.
07:11Fucking Cohen just doesn't stop.
07:14I don't know.
07:15The shitty part is I don't know what to do with Plan B.
07:18I just have no idea.
07:20Done.
07:21Look, the Mets are now the off-season champs.
07:23They win every off-season, all the pressure's on them.
07:27Uncle Stevie is a criminal and a crook.
07:29I personally could never root for an owner
07:31who allegedly has defrauded millions of Americans
07:35and has made his money screwing over the common man like you watching this.
07:39That's who Steve Cohen makes his money off of.
07:41He watches and he says, I'm going to take advantage of these people.
07:44Steve Cohen, allegedly, scumbag, largest fraud in SEC history.
07:47I would never be able to root for a guy like that.
07:49But I'm happy the Mets got their guy.
07:51Also, those same grace, I truly believe if he went to Boston,
07:54it would be the worst moment in my life.
07:56So, listen, the Mets isn't that much better,
08:00but Boston having to deal with him in the division and here, this company,
08:05that would have been, to me, the worst.
08:07I know for Tommy, he thinks the Mets basically are the Red Sox in his life.
08:10That's not how I operate.
08:12So, at least he's not in Boston.
08:15But this sucks.
08:17This guy brought Juan Soto to the Mets.
08:20This guy is Ted Williams.
08:22This is amazing.
08:23The Mets are...
08:24Listen to this line.
08:27Hopefully we get Alonzo.
08:29Who am I forgetting? Who am I forgetting in the Mets?
08:31Obviously Soto.
08:33You got Alvarez catching.
08:34Like this, oh, Vientos.
08:36I mean, stacked lineup, but he's got to get some more pitching, though.
08:38We need an ace.
08:39New York baseball has changed forever now.
08:40A player of that caliber going from the Mets, from the Yankees to the Mets,
08:43after the Yankees were in the World Series, it just doesn't happen.
08:46But it did happen, so now baseball in New York changed forever.
08:49KFC's on Twitter, I think this, like, Met fans on Twitter acting like it's over
08:53and, like, the Mets just own, like, the Yankees were just in the World Series.
08:56To be clear.
08:57Like, they've been to a World Series more recently.
08:59They've certainly had a lot more success more recently.
09:02They signed a big free agent.
09:03I'm not knocking that, but to act like this has, you know,
09:05completely upended the balance of power in New York is crazy.
09:09It's just a bad year.
09:10Just a really bad year.
09:11Everything's been bad.
09:14Lost the World Series in devastating fashion and errors.
09:17Now Juan Soto's a Mets, even worse, a Met.
09:23Iowa State's, I mean, maybe they'll salvage something.
09:26Probably not, because Ryan Day's a fucking pussy.
09:28They'll lose.
09:30Oh, my God, the Giants are, like, the worst team ever.
09:33And we're going to have the number one or two pick
09:35in, like, the worst quarterback class ever.
09:37Raiders will probably get the first pick.
09:38They'll get Chouinard.
09:39We'll get nothing.
09:40And the story goes on.
09:43The worst combination of teams right now through sports.
09:47It's up there, man.
09:48Like, Yankees, because now what the Yankees are going to do is
09:51they're going to try to, like, spend the Soto money on, like,
09:54Max Freed and, like, Alonzo.
09:57Alonzo, who's also a pussy.
09:58Gigantic pussy.
10:00Bregman, who, like, the most, like, Yankees thing of all time would be
10:04Bregman obviously was, like, a star beating us in World Series
10:07or playoffs, whatever, for years.
10:09He'll come to the Yankees and be bad.
10:11I feel like I sound like Frank now.
10:12I literally sound like he's going to go to the Yankees and be shitty.
10:15I know it's frowned upon.
10:17I'm rooting for Juan Soto to get hurt every year.
10:20I'm rooting for you to get hurt every year.
10:22Okay, I wasn't even talking to you, Meek.
10:24Yeah, nothing serious.
10:26Like, little injuries for Juan Soto, that nagging injuries that he just,
10:29nothing serious that's going to affect him long term.
10:31He gets back, and then, again, another hamstring.
10:34Just little things like that.
10:35I'm just hoping for little nagging injuries for Soto,
10:39and I have no problem saying that.
10:41I think he's a bad guy.
10:42He's the stripper who makes you fall in love, and we fell for it.
10:46We were like, oh, we fell for it.
10:48He loves us.
10:50He's a mercenary.
10:51He was always going to take the most money.
10:52Not a scumbag, a bad guy, and he's probably 31 years old.
10:55I mean, it's hilarious on Twitter.
10:58Like, Yankees fans, what they're doing on Twitter right now is they're,
11:01like, making compilations of Juan Soto misplaying foul balls.
11:05Making errors.
11:06But yesterday, they were like, this is the best baseball player ever.
11:09Also, that becomes too much.
11:10I'm saying he's greedy.
11:11He's so rich.
11:12It's like, yeah, how do you think you guys have been getting players forever?
11:14Like, welcome to the game.
11:17The evil empire is no longer evil.
11:19They're just the Yankees now.
11:21It's like, yeah, you have history, but here's the thing.
11:24Juan Soto doesn't go, fuck.
11:26He doesn't even care about the Yankees.
11:27It's a met city now.
11:28Met city, baby.
11:29Yep.
11:30It's crazy hearing Yankees fans be like, oh, he's only in it for the money.
11:33That's all your heroes growing up.
11:35I'm not kidding.
11:36I never liked him that much.
11:37I never liked him that much.
11:38Blame your GM.
11:39Don't blame the player.
11:41The owner offered him $760 million.
11:43I don't blame Hal.
11:44I don't blame Cashman.
11:45He should have security guards throw his family out for no reason.
11:47Oh, yeah.
11:48And now we're having all these leaks, the Boris and Soto leaks,
11:50because they want to not have their client look like a money-hungry pig that he is.
11:54And he's 31 years old.
11:55He's not 31.
11:56He's 26.
11:57He's 31 years old.
11:58And he's going to haunt you in the next 15 years, you and your shitty organization.
12:01How does it play four times a year, you freak?
12:07They're already celebrating World Series.
12:09They haven't won it.
12:10Thoughts, guys?
12:11Both poverty-side franchises.
12:13Oh, I mean.
12:18Yeah, what are your thoughts?
12:19They don't even have, like, any pitches.
12:23Worst reliever is their number two starting pitcher.
12:26We kicked the golf team as your number two.
12:29But once Soto wins you it, that's what it is.
12:31I forgot the offseason ended on December 12th.
12:35I see that.
12:36Naturally come back.
12:37No, it's not, because you're not going to get anyone.
12:38We're not going to get anyone?
12:39Okay.
12:40Who are you going to get?
12:41Bring back Sean Mania?
12:42We have the greatest owner in baseball right there, Uncle Stevie.
12:45Such a great owner.
12:46He's accomplished so much.
12:48He's done so many good things.
12:50Just got one Soto, so that's pretty good.
12:52Yeah, it's great.
12:53It's awesome.
12:54No wins yet.
12:55No wins?
12:56What do you mean, no wins?
12:57What has he done?
12:58What have you done in the last, like, 20 years?
13:01More than the Mets.
13:0215 years, say.
13:03More than the Mets.
13:0415 years?
13:05More than the Mets?
13:06Not really.
13:07Yeah, more than the Mets.
13:08How do you figure?
13:09How do you figure?
13:10They won more games, deeper in the playoffs.
13:11That's better.
13:12I don't know if your brain can-
13:13The Yankees have done more than the Mets in 15 years.
13:15I count pennants, and I count World Series titles.
13:18Yankees were such an accomplished organization.
13:22We're talking Mets-Yankees right now, yeah.
13:24So, Yankees have been better, yes or no?
13:25Yeah, I guess so.
13:26So, yeah, they have.
13:27I guess so, technically, if you count, like, LCS appearances and stuff.
13:29Little weak things like that.
13:30I thought you guys were above that.
13:31That's all.
13:32Well, no, no, but we're just talking Yankees-Mets.
13:33Okay.
13:34It's always World Series or Boss for the Yankees.
13:35We know that.
13:36Now we live in that world.
13:37How do you feel about the Yankees losing Soto?
13:40Yeah, it was tough.
13:41It was tough, obviously.
13:42But, yeah, now we're just going to have the best starting pitching staff in baseball.
13:47I mean, you already have.
13:48You'll be the second, right?
13:49We're going to keep adding more guys.
13:50So, I mean, our 1-2 is now, like, lethal.
13:54I think your 1-5 stacks up with-
13:56It's good.
13:57Except for the Dodgers, everybody.
13:58It's very good.
13:59And now we just have more money to spend.
14:00We'll go get another couple bats, another couple bullpen arms, probably.
14:04Probably good on starting pitching.
14:05Now, maybe they add another one.
14:06Who knows?
14:07Got a lot of money to spend.
14:09Well, you need offense.
14:10You need offense.
14:13I don't know.
14:14Clemmer's just screaming.
14:15I think he's on Pick Central, but I'm not exactly sure what's happening.
14:19But Clemmer loves yelling as loud as possible.
14:24As all of the new episodes of Surviving Barcelona are coming out,
14:26I don't want it to get lost in the sauce that Tommy John is the best underwear brand that we've got going.
14:30Okay?
14:31It's the best underwear that I've ever worn on my body.
14:32It's the best underwear that I've ever seen some of my coworkers wearing.
14:35I don't know.
14:36Sounds a little crazy.
14:37But Tommy John also has a lot of clothes.
14:40They have a lot of my shirts, my leggings I was wearing, my sports bras, everything.
14:43Rhea looked amazing in her sets every single day on Surviving Barcelona.
14:46It was just fantastic.
14:47And Tommy John is just wonderful to us.
14:49So we love them so much.
14:50And if you head to TommyJohn.com slash Barcelona,
14:53you'll get 40% off site-wide around the Christmas time.
14:57And just get yourself some for yourself.
15:00Get some for your family.
15:01Get some for everyone you know.
15:02Love, Tommy John.
15:04Last night, we heard the term.
15:06It's a man's game.
15:09What's the problem?
15:10You have a big mouth.
15:11How do I have a big mouth?
15:12I mean, would you forget the conversation we already had last night?
15:15Rico Bosco was saying he wanted to kill all the girls,
15:18and Rhea and Megan Making Money were right there and heard it.
15:21Bosco was right.
15:22We should have made this a man's game.
15:24He said that day one.
15:25He's like, what if we just said it's a man's game and got all the girls out first?
15:30We should have made this a man's game.
15:32I'm not above being the biggest spy of all time.
15:35I'll have a cup to adore.
15:36I will watch you through a crack.
15:38I'll try to read your lips,
15:40and you can definitely hear a bunch of bullshit.
15:51Rico said it the first day.
15:52We should get all the girls out first.
15:53It's a man's game.
15:54Rico did say we should gas all the girls from day one.
15:57We busted his balls about that.
15:59It obviously didn't happen.
16:00Yeah.
16:01If we're being in all fairness,
16:02it was a real strategy you threw out there.
16:04I'll tell you when I said it.
16:05It was in the morning during breakfast.
16:06Okay, okay.
16:07Before we even dropped off.
16:08Well, you understand why I'm now mean.
16:09A hundred percent.
16:10A hundred percent.
16:11We're just guys fucking around.
16:12I know.
16:13We were.
16:14We were fucking around.
16:15Well, you were.
16:16It's a man's game.
16:17Yes.
16:18I'm going to go shower.
16:20Yeah, it was a strategy, you know, early.
16:23I don't know if it was the best strategy,
16:25but it's a strategy.
16:27I think here's the thing.
16:28It's the hunted and the huntees.
16:30People I knew were hunting for me.
16:31They probably were like, let's get Rico out.
16:33So I just threw a suggestion out there.
16:35Let's get the girls out.
16:36You know?
16:37I don't know.
16:38They're good at puzzles.
16:39They're doing well so far.
16:40Circle the wagons.
16:41Make alliances.
16:42Yeah, right.
16:43See what happens, right?
16:44Yeah.
16:45Sometimes it works.
16:46Yeah.
16:47Hey, listen.
16:48It's a man's game.
16:49What was your take last night on Survivor
16:53when Rico said it's a man's game?
16:55Like, he said that at the beginning of the thing,
16:58and, you know, we heard about it.
17:01We all rolled our eyes about it,
17:02and then we just threw it back in his face
17:03for the rest of the game.
17:04Like, I've never repeated a line like that
17:06as much as I have with Matt.
17:07Like, it's just so, so annoying.
17:10He's the worst.
17:11He's the worst.
17:12I mean, there's no place for that.
17:15There's no place for saying that kind of thing.
17:17Those kind of true statements about women,
17:19I don't think that this is where we tell the truth, okay?
17:22Maybe you save that for another company,
17:25corporate America or something like that,
17:27but, God, we're not about to be telling
17:31hard facts of the truth about how things are
17:34and how things should be.
17:35Not in this program, not here.
17:37There's no space for it.
17:39Really, I knew it was successful.
17:41I didn't know there was a camera.
17:43All right.
17:44We got to keep that.
17:46Keep that on there.
17:47Before you leave, Robert,
17:48can I get your thoughts on your power rankings?
17:51Oh, for overall surviving power rankings?
17:53Yeah, yeah.
17:54I think Francis and Gilly
17:55were the number one and two so far,
17:57but now people are starting to kirk,
17:59and Kirk is starting to fire up.
18:01So I think as this thing goes on,
18:03you're going to see the cream of the crop
18:05rise to the top.
18:06Okay.
18:07All right, because surviving barstool
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18:26Just shut the...
18:27Truck drivers.
18:28Truck drivers.
18:29He never had a losing season.
18:31He took a Packers team that went
18:3312 years without a winning season.
18:35You showed him a nickel defense.
18:36He'd have a brain aneurysm.
18:37Well, they didn't play nickel defense.
18:39You got to compare errors.
18:41But if he grew up in this era,
18:43he'd figure the damn nickel defense out.
18:45No, he'd be comparable to like...
18:47Come on.
18:48Who?
18:49Drake Vanjie?
18:50He's the greatest basketball player ever, too.
18:52Everything he did now is...
18:54No.
18:55Vince Lombardi is the greatest coach ever.
18:57That's why they named the trophy after him.
18:58Hugh Jackson was a better coach than Vince Lombardi.
19:00Who?
19:05Are you on drugs?
19:08I mean...
19:09Are you on drugs?
19:12I mean...
19:13As Stephen A. Smith would say,
19:14lay off the weed.
19:19Vince Lombardi is the best coach ever.
19:22Period. End of story.
19:23Never had a losing season.
19:24What are you talking about?
19:25He thinks...
19:27I put maybe two of us, right?
19:29Oh, Don Shula?
19:31I put Vince Lombardi is the greatest coach ever.
19:33Oh, yeah. Fordham. Stand up.
19:36He went to Fordham!
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