00:00CM Punk takes a shot at AEW… again.
00:04John Cena ruins wrestling.
00:07But intentionally this time.
00:08A former WWE star sentenced to 5 years in prison.
00:12And my review of WWE Raw.
00:14I'm Oli Davis, and this is the WrestleTalk News.
00:21Former UFC Heavyweight Champion Cain Velasquez, who had an unceremonious run in WWE from 2019
00:27to kind of 2020, has been sentenced to 5 years in prison.
00:32The case was as tragic as it was complex.
00:34In February 2022, Velasquez learned that his son had been sexually molested.
00:39Velasquez allegedly chased after the man he believed to have been the perpetrator, and
00:44shot at the man through the window of his car.
00:46He missed his intended target, and hit the man's stepfather, causing him non-life threatening
00:51injuries.
00:52In court on the 24th March, Velasquez pleaded no contest to the attempted murder charge.
00:58Despite the Deputy DA asking for 30 years to life, F4WOnline is reporting that Velasquez
01:03was sentenced to 5 years in prison, but will receive credit for more than 3 and a half
01:08years of time served.
01:10Because he was incarcerated for 8 months following the initial shooting, and him wearing an ankle
01:14monitor since, his lawyers apparently believe he'll serve one more year in prison.
01:19Oddly, during that period that might be counted as time served, Velasquez won a trios match
01:24in the Mexican wrestling promotion AAA, teaming with Pagano and Blue Demon Jr to defeat La
01:29Empresa and Taurus in a show in December 2022, 7 months after the alleged offence took place.
01:36Prior to then, he made his wrestling debut with AAA in August 2019.
01:40Two months later, he started his weird run in WWE, debuting on the first ever episode
01:45of SmackDown on Fox, the one where Brock Lesnar squashed Kofi Kingston.
01:48Velasquez was to be Lesnar's first title feud, who was taking revenge for Rey Mysterio
01:53after Brock had beaten up his son Dominik.
01:56Back before Dominik was a big piece of trash, Lesnar then beat Velasquez at the Saudi Arabian
02:01pay-per-view Crown Jewel later that month.
02:03Velasquez had one more match at a house show after that, but got injured and never got
02:07to enter the January's Royal Rumble.
02:09He was released by WWE as part of the first wave of pandemic cuts in April 2020.
02:15Just as WrestleVotes reported several weeks ago, legendary WWE tag team The Natural Disasters
02:20have been officially announced as inductees into this year's Hall of Fame class.
02:24The ringer broke the news that Earthquake, real name John Tenter, and Typhoon, real name
02:28Fred Ottman, will join Triple H, Michelle McCool and Lex Luger in this year's ceremony,
02:33which takes place on the Friday before WrestleMania 41.
02:36Maybe proving wrestling actually only has one royal family, Typhoon is married to Dusty
02:41Rhodes' sister, making him Cody's real life uncle.
02:45He also wrestled under the gimmicks Tugboat and, infamously, The Shockmaster, who they
02:50are presumably holding off to headline his own class one day.
02:53Earthquake sadly passed in 2006.
03:23I am playing a French man, and a French man would have a vape.
03:27Anyway, you said I had to do a lot of thinking, and I've done a lot of it since then, and
03:31it all adds up to one thing.
03:32You're getting on that plane.
03:33It's just that the French like to vape, and as a French man, I would also like to vape.
03:40That's just a stereotype, Luke.
03:42I think you just want to vape.
03:43No, I don't want to vape.
03:44I'm a committed actor.
03:45But you're just saying this to make me go.
03:46I'm saying that because it's true.
03:47If that plane leaves and you're not on it, you'll regret it.
03:53Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but you will for the rest of your life.
03:56I said I would never watch Wrestlemania without you.
03:59Then you won't.
04:00I'll be watching it on the telly.
04:01You there, small boy, do you have a vape?
04:04Luke, have you ever heard of Fume?
04:06Fume?
04:07Yes, Fume is an award-winning flavored air device that draws flavor to your mouth, not
04:12your lungs.
04:13It's a great way to satisfy your aura of fixation with non-toxic flavors, free from nicotine
04:17or vapor, and it's safe to use anywhere.
04:19Fume's design is also more than just flavor.
04:21It's an awesome fidget tool with magnets and clicks that can calm anxiety.
04:24You'll love how Fume feels.
04:25Premium quality, sleek design, and perfect for taking with you on the go.
04:29Flavored air isn't like vaping.
04:31If vapor was compared to sticky soda, Fume cores are close to herbal teas.
04:35Fume has lots of delicious flavors to choose from, like crisp mint and orange vanilla.
04:39With flavored air, you can satisfy your aura of fixation through a passive diffusion system
04:42that utilizes no electronics, vapor, or combustion.
04:45Fume has already helped over 300,000 people build better habits.
04:48Try Fume today, and if you order the Journey Pack using our code WrestleTalk, you'll get
04:51a free Fume topper, an awesome accessory to level up your experience.
04:55Go to tryfume.com forward slash WrestleTalk, or scan the QR code on screen.
04:59Ho ho ho, now I can feel really French.
05:02Okay.
05:03Right, Luke, can you just let me finish?
05:05One day you'll understand that the problems of three little people trying to watch WrestleMania,
05:09they don't head out to Hell Beats.
05:11It's looking at you, kid.
05:14Yes.
05:15I'm ready.
05:17God bless you, Sullivan.
05:23Don't touch me, Luke.
05:25Now it's time for my review of Monday Night Raw… in about 5 minutes.
05:30This was only the second time ever that Raw was broadcast live at a European hour coming
05:35from Scotland.
05:36But instead, I didn't watch this week's episode live, because I was instead catching
05:40up with the White Lotus.
05:43Where the bad thing happened.
05:47I made a mistake, I should've just watched the wrestling.
05:51The wrestling doesn't have the bad thing.
05:53By White Lotus standards, John Cena's latest heel promo was wonderfully tame.
05:57Like there wasn't a single bit of incest in the whole thing.
06:00That's my benchmark now, White Lotus has broken me.
06:03Just like the previous week's episode, Cena opened the show and continued his diatribe
06:07on the You People.
06:09And in a way, I enjoyed this week's even more.
06:12Firstly, it was more succinct.
06:14I love the long pauses for crowd reactions in Belgium, but this was a much punchier 10
06:19minute promo before Cody interrupted.
06:21Half the length of the last Raw.
06:22And all that without that goddamn kid taking up all that time and going into business for
06:26himself.
06:27B, it was really well structured.
06:29He said after all these years of Cena absorbing our reactions to him, he knows us more than
06:34we know ourselves.
06:36He masterfully started a speech designed to get the crowd to chant WOT, and then pointed
06:41that out to them.
06:42In one of the best, most immediate, self-reflecting shutdowns of the WOT chant I've ever heard.
06:47I bet that goddamn kid was chanting WOT at home too.
06:50And Roman numeral III had more substance, with John laying out his brilliantly cartoonish
06:56supervillain motivation.
06:58Because we all love wrestling so much, he's going to ruin wrestling.
07:03He's going to win the 17th world title and take it home with him.
07:07Not just erasing Ric Flair's name from the record books, but also meaning he will be
07:11the last real champion, and everyone after him will just have a toy belt.
07:17A toy belt just like we used to criticise his old spinner belts.
07:22We bought this on ourselves.
07:24But mostly that goddamn kid did.
07:27This was where Cody interrupted.
07:28I said last week I wanted a bit more fire from him.
07:31I feel even more strongly about that here.
07:33He came out high-fiving fans with a big smile on his face, and again kind of brushed past
07:38the Elimination Chamber angle and said the real affront is what he just said about the
07:44WWE title.
07:45Which, I'll give them the benefit of the doubt, might be intentionally, ironically
07:50very old John Cena, where he'd no sell the anger his character should often be feeling
07:55so he can play up to the crowd as a one-dimensional babyface.
07:59Cody challenged him to a fight right there, but Cena walked away.
08:02Mate, just slap him.
08:04Pat McAfee was back on commentary, presumably because we voted for Brexit.
08:07He bought a kilt.
08:08After two weeks of undercard filler matches, easily beating Austin Theory and Grayson Waller,
08:13Jey Uso now had to take them both on, in a tag team match with a mystery tag team partner.
08:20Raw is in Scotland.
08:22No other Scottish wrestlers are appearing on this show, which can only mean one thing
08:27his name and he appears are believing Jimmy Uso.
08:33When Jimmy just popped up alongside Jey in mid-heat, you could almost hear the crowd
08:37sigh.
08:38I mean, I guess that makes sense.
08:40And on paper, it is a big deal.
08:42This is the first time that Uso's legendary WWE tag team have done a straight brotherly
08:48tag in almost two years, as opposed to a non-straight brotherly tag.
08:53But while they haven't been doing direct tags, they have been teaming quite regularly
09:04in other combinations since last October, at Crown Jewel, at Survivor Series, on SmackDown.
09:10So emotionally, it didn't really register, particularly with so much Joe Hendry speculation.
09:16I said his name.
09:17Jimmy was there to mostly get worked over, they hit a 1D on Theory for the win.
09:21And just like every week for the past six, Gunther then attacked them both.
09:25Jey somehow slipped when sending up a spear, which I'm assuming was a kayfabe planned
09:29spot to show how he's not ready for Gunther, playing off his botched dive from last week.
09:33And then Jimmy chased Gunther off.
09:35Backstage, it was Jimmy who showed the fire, telling Jey he needs to find the old Jey Uso.
09:42He then walked right round the corner into Gunther, slapped him and set up a match for
09:46next week, implying that Gunther, the World Heavyweight Champion, was just sneakily eavesdropping
09:52behind the corner.
09:55Despite Liv Morgan trying to interfere, Lyra of Alkiria rolled up Raquel Rodriguez to retain
09:59her Intercontinental title.
10:01Bayley made the save from the post-match Judgment Day beatdown, likely continuing the worthless
10:05trend of if you lose a No. 1 contender's match for the women's IC belt, you'll
10:10probably get the match after the winner anyway.
10:12Adam Pearce explained contract law that you can't just sign a document not intended
10:15for you and then it becomes yours.
10:17But Rhea Ripley does have a rematch for the women's title.
10:20This brought out Ripley, Io Sky and Bianca Belair, who were all arguing again.
10:24Pearce booked Ripley's rematch against Io next week with Belair as the special guest
10:28referee, which will be a fun clash of dynamics.
10:31The segment then broke down into a brawl of contrived three-way spots, sacrificing the
10:35intensity of last week's segment for choreographed moves.
10:38The New Day demanded a tag title match at Mania backstage, I forgot they had turned
10:43heel.
10:44WWE's new best act.
10:47El Grande Americano, who is definitely not Chad Gable.
10:52Chad Gable's been signed off with a doctor's note.
10:54Cough.
10:55Cough.
10:56WWE had a lot of fun with the parody, billing him from the Gulf of America, playing an AI-generated
11:01video package pretending he's this legendary Mexican wrestling figure, and having him do
11:05Chad's thank you catchphrase, but as Gracias.
11:09And then, just like his Kurt Angle spirit animal, Grande Americano seamlessly blended
11:14a comedy gimmick with great in-ring wrestling.
11:17He had a very good match with Dragon Lee, who he heelishly beat by pulling off his mask
11:21and making him tap in the ankle lock.
11:24With the three-way now official for WrestleMania and, far more importantly, his appearance
11:28on Stephanie McMahon's new interview series Stephanie's Place is coming up, CM Punk came
11:32out to cut a promo and dunk on AEW, with a line about his opponents Roman Reigns and
11:37Seth Rollins, but really about the Young Bucks and Hangman Page, which he said in his
11:42infamous Brawlout 2022 promo.
11:44But the more things change, the more they stay the same.
11:47I work with children.
11:49The reason Seth and Roman are children, he claimed, was because they're taking this
11:53all personally.
11:54While he's all about the business.
11:57Which is why he's got a triple threat match at WrestleMania with no stakes.
12:04Based on a personal blood feud.
12:07It doesn't quite make sense.
12:08Which is why this is probably a tease that some A5 Wagyu is going to be added.
12:13By which I mean very high quality steaks.
12:15He teased still maybe getting what he wanted, which was a WrestleMania main event.
12:20He brought up that Paul Heyman still owes him that favour.
12:23Something that could be added into the contract for the signing on this Friday's SmackDown
12:28in London.
12:29Which the Scottish crowd booed, but Punk handled it way better than Seth in Belgium last week.
12:34Punk finished on the fantastic line that he was the person to bring both Reigns and
12:38Rollins into WWE, and now he'll be the one to take them out.
12:43And the main event saw Brom Breaker defending his IC title against Penta.
12:47The match was so much fun to watch, because it was just all the coolest moves.
12:51But like the worst of Raw in 2024, it was all really just a backdrop to less interesting
12:56Judgment Day drama.
12:58Dom had been trying to recruit Penta earlier in the night, so he tried to impress Penta
13:02by causing him to lose via interference DQ.
13:05Finn Balor suddenly appeared to attack Brom with a chair in the post-match.
13:08He briefly looked like he was going to hit Dom too, but instead he gave him the chair
13:12to continue the beatdown.
13:14But Dom, much to Finn's frustration, gave the chair to Penta, who superkicked it into
13:18him.
13:19Judgment Day ended up standing tall for a change, which will reportedly lead to a Brom
13:23vs Penta vs Finn vs Dom four way for the IC title at WrestleMania.
13:28It was very weird there was no Drew McIntyre on this show.
13:31This week's Raw is 68%.
13:34Now go watch the brand new episode of me vs Luke in 2K25's MyGM mode by clicking the
13:40video onscreen now!
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