00:00Hello, I'm Penelope Towns, and this is my home, Towns Hall.
00:26Slightly run down, I know.
00:28But I'm not worried. Soon it's going to be fixed and fabulous again.
00:32You see, Mummy's getting married today.
00:35Everything's going to change, because Mummy's dreadfully in love with Bubbles.
00:39And he's going to restore the hall to its former glory.
00:43Hi, Penelope! Raining in here, too, huh?
00:47Really? I hadn't noticed.
00:49Oh, I hope it stops before the wedding!
00:54Yes, there are paying guests. Americans, in case you haven't noticed.
00:59Well, I guess they haven't stolen the silverware, like those Australians.
01:04But after today, no more yes-sir and no-ma'am.
01:07Mummy and I will be free again, and happy.
01:11Yoo-hoo, Penelope!
01:13Marcia and Sophie, I can't stand them. They're so insincere and hypocritical.
01:18Marcia, Sophie, it's so good to see you. Come in.
01:21Penelope, I'm so pleased your mother has found a new banker.
01:24I mean, a husband.
01:26Thank you, Marcia.
01:27Your mummy's in love. It must be such a relief.
01:30At last, they'll have the money to pay for your school fees.
01:33Yes. Isn't this another way of watering the flowers?
01:38Yes. In-house irrigation.
01:42Hello, Lady Towns. You must be so happy.
01:45Yes.
01:46All these flowers, they are so beautiful.
01:49It's like a funeral parlour.
01:52Miss Penelope?
01:53Yes, Marcia?
01:54Be a dear and go up to the attic. We need some more ravassers.
01:56Look in that old trunk.
02:00Won't be long.
02:01Can't wait. I miss you already.
02:11I just don't like the attic.
02:19Come on, let's go.
02:49Come on, Penelope. You're not scared.
03:19See? I'm not scared.
03:49Come on.
04:20I'm in the attic!
04:36Dad, we're free!
04:41Anyone got a can opener?
04:44See you in the attic, son.
04:50Don't worry about us, mate.
04:52We've been stuck inside that tiny opal for about 130 years and we've gone a bit troppo.
04:56I tell you what, mate, we've been looking forward to this moment.
04:59I can't wait to smell the eucalyptus in the water.
05:02I've been dreaming about the sunshine.
05:05And the way the hot wind comes off the desert round about sunset.
05:09Dad!
05:10On the dawn chorus. I can't wait to hear that carillon call.
05:14Dad, I don't think we're in Australia.
05:20I don't know how to tell you this, son, but...
05:23I don't think we're in Australia.
05:25Where are we?
05:27Ayee.
05:28Ayee?
05:29Where's that, Dad?
05:30I've never heard of it.
05:32Hey, where are you going?
05:34Don't be scared. We're just a couple of genies.
05:37No wonder we forgot to tell her.
05:40You've rubbed the earth, bleeding your hand.
05:43You're everywhere.
05:45You've rubbed the earth, bleeding your hand.
05:48You're everywhere.
05:51He's our commander.
05:54I must be dreaming.
05:56What my son was trying to say...
05:58Get away from me!
06:00You're gonna be...
06:06You're gonna be a trophy.
06:08Two people, in the attic, from Australia, sticking their heads out.
06:11Calm down, take a deep breath.
06:13Back to the silverware.
06:14No, not those Australians.
06:16So, the two heads were poking through this door.
06:20There's something weird going on in there.
06:22Right.
06:24Stand back.
06:25Be careful, Rossi.
06:35There ain't any Australians here.
06:37But...
06:38I think you can have a lie down before the wedding.
06:40You're a bit overexcited.
06:42There was a man, and a little boy.
06:44Of course there was.
06:49Really, Mummy, I'm all right.
06:51Get some rest now.
06:53You're my maid of honour, and I want you to look especially beautiful.
06:56Don't you worry, my dears.
06:57Lord Accrington Smythe will make all our wishes come true.
07:00Now you get some rest.
07:03Ah, there you are.
07:05Here she is, Dad.
07:09You grabbed the opal in your hand.
07:11Your every wish is our command.
07:14Wow, what's that?
07:18What do you want?
07:19Fine, I have to get to school quick.
07:21What?
07:22As I was saying, I'm a genie, and this is my son.
07:24I'm a junior genie.
07:26I'm a junior genie.
07:28I'm a junior genie.
07:29I'm a junior genie.
07:31I'm a junior genie.
07:32And you're our master.
07:33Your every wish is our command.
07:35You have one complete day of unlimited wishing.
07:37Then you have to send us to Australia and set us free.
07:39It's pretty straightforward.
07:41Any questions?
07:48Genies live in lamps, don't they?
07:50Yeah, I used to live in a lamp.
07:51A lovely lamp it was, too, but I got banished.
07:54Why?
07:55You know the Great Wall of China?
07:57It was supposed to be in Egypt.
07:59So there was a small indiscretion with the Grand Magician's wife.
08:05And out popped the young bloke.
08:07Well, the Grand Magician was so cheesed off that he stuck us in the middle of an opal,
08:10in the middle of a mine,
08:12in the middle of a desert,
08:13in the middle of...
08:15that great southern land.
08:19So what are you doing here in the middle of Wiltshire?
08:21Well, it's a long story.
08:22I've got time.
08:24Okay.
08:25We've been stuck inside that opal for 134 years,
08:27nine months, six days, 18 hours, 37 and a half minutes,
08:30not that we're counting.
08:31And last time we were out we were in Australia
08:33and our master was a palmy gent by the name of Claude Towns.
08:36I'll have you know that Sir Claude Towns was my great-great-great-grandfather.
08:41Oh. Well, Claudie wasn't too bad a bloke for a palm.
08:47Very disrespectful.
08:49Anyway, I'm not sure that I believe your genie.
08:54Fair enough.
08:56No skin off my nose.
08:58If you don't believe we're genies, you won't win me wishes then.
09:02Maybe you could do us a favour and say,
09:04I wish you were both back in Australia
09:07and we'll be off like a bucket of prawns in the sun.
09:09You won't hear from us again.
09:12Adele at the air.
09:13Yes, just a minute.
09:15Just say it, mate, and we'll be gone.
09:18I think I'd like you to hang around, just to be sure.
09:23Is that a wish?
09:25Yes.
09:29What are you doing?
09:32Just hanging around.
09:33That was your wish.
09:36Penelope, are you all right?
09:37Yes, coming.
09:39Look, I wish you'd just disappear.
09:42I understand that you'd like me to go away,
09:44but I was hoping we could have a chat.
09:48I wasn't talking to you.
09:50Oh, to whom were you talking?
09:52She was talking to us.
09:54Will you be quiet?
09:56I'm sorry, I...
09:57Penelope, are you all right?
10:00Yes, come in.
10:02Thank you.
10:03It's all right, I understand.
10:04Marriage can be very stressful for everyone concerned.
10:07That's why I was rather hoping that we could have a bit of a father-son,
10:10a mother and daughter, a bit of a chat.
10:13It's just the bloke your mum's marrying.
10:15Will you be quiet?
10:17I'm sorry, I'm not talking to you.
10:19It's all right, I understand.
10:20You know, Penelope,
10:21you probably think of me as a bit of an old fuddy-duddy,
10:23a bit of a square,
10:25but I'm really quite him.
10:27As a matter of fact, I'm a bit of a cool dude.
10:29So you should all feel that you're losing a mummy
10:31rather than that you're gaining a daddy.
10:33And I will be that daddy,
10:35and therefore I will love you and be there for you
10:37in a very caring, sharing sort of way.
10:39So we should be very positive and upbeat about the whole thing.
10:41Do you know where I'm coming from?
10:43Oh, I'm thrilled you and mummy are getting married.
10:46And I think you'll make a smashing daddy.
10:48Really? Oh, thank you, Penelope.
10:50Oh, I'm so happy. That's exactly what I needed to hear.
10:52I've been so worried, so uptight about the whole thing.
10:55If I was you, I'd be worried too.
10:57Will you be quiet?
10:59It's all right. It's cool.
11:01I know you're not talking to me.
11:03Being a teenager isn't easy, and I can dig that.
11:06Well, I'm glad we've had this little chat.
11:11Penelope, I'll see you in church then.
11:17Bye, Penelope.
11:21Penelope, give me five.
11:35Is that the bloke your mum's going to marry?
11:37That's right. They're in love.
11:39How can anyone love Boobie?
11:41I think there's a few sheep short in the top paddy.
11:44You two are the rudest people I've ever met.
11:47I've never been so embarrassed.
11:49Miss Penelope, be a dear and take some coffee to Mr and Mrs Hemingway.
11:53Oh, Mossie, they're so boring.
11:55Well, everyone has to be pitied. Take me, now.
11:58Her ladyship owes me £3,131.47 in back salary till last Friday,
12:05but I never mention it.
12:07So I've noticed.
12:09Because I know my place.
12:11I know Lord Applington-Smyth and her ladyship will see me right once they're married.
12:15Now be a dear and help with our paying guests.
12:18I wish they'd just go and jump in a lake.
12:20Your wish.
12:21Is he up yet?
12:38That was just great!
12:40I really feel as if I've found myself...
12:43Oh, Diana, you've got to try that sometime.
12:46You should put it in your brochure. Oh, yeah.
12:48Yes, I've heard it's very popular in California.
12:54A coffee?
12:55Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
12:58I have done her weddings, you know.
13:00But this is meant to be a traditional English wedding.
13:03That's why we're having presents.
13:05A present for Dulu is not traditional British fare.
13:09Everyone has curry nowadays.
13:11But you don't have curry sauce with plum pudding.
13:14Everything under control, Mossie.
13:16Oh, yes, my lady.
13:18Don't you worry about a thing.
13:19This is going to be one of the happiest days of your life.
13:23Yes.
13:40I love you.
13:43I always heard that.
13:46She's getting married to Boobie.
13:48Oh.
13:49Oh.
14:08These up, mate? You'll wear it out.
14:12Now, I've been thinking.
14:14I'm not saying I believe that you are a genius,
14:16but if you were,
14:17well, then, if I wish for a beautiful day for Mummy's wedding,
14:20would you be able to do that?
14:22Oh, yeah.
14:23She'll be able to rustle up a few rays for you.
14:26Well, then, I wish it were a beautiful day.
14:41That should make my mother happy.
14:42She'll never be happy if she has to marry that Boobie bloke.
14:46Bubbles.
14:47His friends call him Bubbles.
14:48And he happens to be one of the richest men in England.
14:51And Mummy's going to be very, very happy.
14:54So there.
14:55Yeah, well, she's only doing it for you.
14:57Oh, don't be ridiculous.
14:59Mummy's in love.
15:01If you could be a fly on the wall right now,
15:03you'd see how unhappy your mother really is.
15:05Oh, is that so?
15:07Well, I wish I were, then, so I could prove you wrong.
15:12No!
15:17It's a beautiful day, after all, my lady.
15:21Tricked me.
15:23Tell me, Your Ladyship, how do you feel about curried ice cream?
15:27I was thinking about my first wedding.
15:30How different it was.
15:33How happy I felt.
15:35Exactly.
15:36I think curried pudding's taking it a bit too far.
15:40I don't think I can go through with it, Morsom.
15:43Oh, but it's too late now to get a new caterer.
15:45Besides your husband-to-be, he loves curry.
15:48I don't love him, Morsom.
15:51I don't think I can go through with it.
15:53Your Ladyship, you have no choice in the matter.
15:57It's too late.
15:59The guests be already on their way.
16:01The curried hors d'oeuvres are being prepared as we speak.
16:05You have to marry Lord Aprington Smythe.
16:09For the sake of Townshall.
16:12For Miss Penelope.
16:15I did not know.
16:19Get out of here!
16:29Hi, Pen.
16:30Thanks.
16:32That was great, Dad.
16:34I think I want to be alone.
16:45Ouch!
16:50I was expecting it to be cold and wet.
16:52Still perfect weather for a curry, eh, Edward?
16:55Oh, yes.
16:56I'm a bit of a connoisseur.
16:58I love a curry.
16:59Especially the pineapple bits.
17:02I thought Miss Penelope was with you, my lady.
17:15Come on, Dad.
17:18Oh, they're cold.
17:37It's them.
17:44It's them.
17:46It's them.
18:12He's going to walk down the aisle.
18:14I'll have to do it.
18:45Excuse me.
18:54Into which holy estate
18:57These two persons present
18:59Come now to be joined.
19:03Therefore, if any man
19:06Could show any just cause
19:08Why they may not lawfully be joined together
19:13Let him now speak
19:15Or else hereafter
19:18Forever hold his peace.
19:23I object!
19:31I'm really sorry, Mummy.
19:32Don't say another word.
19:39I have never been so humiliated in my whole life!
19:43I beg your pardon.
19:45No worries.
19:48Aren't you going to introduce us, Pen?
19:53Do you know this gentleman?
19:56Um, yes.
19:59Well, sort of.
20:01He's a G...
20:02UN... Australian.
20:05And his name is...
20:07Um...
20:09Bruce.
20:12Bruce.
20:14Did I?
20:15And this is Bruce's son...
20:19Barry!
20:20Just call me Bess.
20:21Are you in charge of the marquee, Bruce?
20:23Uh...
20:24Take it down, please.
20:25We won't be needing it now.
20:27Come with me, young lady.
20:29I wish you'd do as she says.
20:31Bruce.
20:41Whatever will they think of next?
20:51Turned out to be a nice day after all.
20:56Thank you, darling.
21:00Somehow...
21:02You did the wrong thing at the right time.
21:06The question now is...
21:09How on earth are we going to keep the town's wall?
21:12Don't worry. Something will turn up.
21:27Hi, Pen.
21:30I'm proud of you, mate.
21:32Thank you.
21:33But it wasn't such a hard decision.
21:35After all, we don't need Bubble's money anymore, do we?
21:39You don't?
21:40Not when I've got you.
21:42Ah.
21:43I don't just have you for one day.
21:45I can have you for as long as I like, can't I?
21:48Strictly speaking, I suppose that is technically true.
21:51And I can have as many wishes as I want.
21:54Really? Is that so?
21:56I don't even have to set you free if I don't feel like it.
21:59Looks like she's onto us, Dad.
22:00I wouldn't say that, son.
22:01Can't even hold the opal, can you?
22:03I don't know what you mean.
22:04Give me your hand.
22:17Looks like she's onto us, son.
22:22A genie cannot hold his own lamp.
22:24Or in your case, opal.
22:26Only a human can hold it.
22:28See?
22:29It's in the genie book.
22:31I've got the opal, so I've got you.
22:33Forever.
22:37Fair enough, pet.
22:39So anyway, I was thinking,
22:41have you ever been to Australia?
22:42It's beautiful this time of year.
22:43I have no intention of going to Australia.
22:45I wouldn't be seen dead down there.
22:47The very idea of it makes me sick.
22:49So you just don't like Australia?
22:52I guess we'll have to accept, son,
22:54that we're never going to see our beloved homeland again.
22:57I want to make some wishes now.
22:59I want to be rich.
23:00I want to be a woman of property.
23:03The old I want to be rich wish.
23:07How much would you like to be worth?
23:09I won't be greedy.
23:10Say, 20 million pounds?
23:14Yes, master.
23:31These are the deeds to the property?
23:35Property?
23:36What property?
23:38The property you've just inherited down under.
23:43Down under what?
23:44Here in Australia, silly.
23:46500 square miles.
23:48Isn't it exciting?
23:51How much is it worth?
23:5220 million pounds.
23:55How much is it worth?
23:5620 million pounds.
24:00G'day, pet.
24:03She's not quite our rememberer,
24:05but a couple of coats of paint, a wish or two,
24:08she'll be right as rain.
24:09No worries.
24:15No!
24:17No!
24:24I'm the genie, you're the master.
24:26That's right.
24:27I'm the master, you're my genie.
24:30You belong to me.
24:31Yes!
24:32I've served a lot of masters throughout history.
24:37Now I want to go back home where I can be free.
24:41Then you come along with the opal in your hand.
24:45Now your every wish is my command.
24:49That's right.
24:50Genie, genie from down under.
24:54Make my wish come true.
24:57Dream on.
24:59Genie, genie from down under.
25:03I wish you'd do what I want you to.
25:06Ah, yeah, all right then.
25:11Genie from down under.
25:15Ah, yeah.
