00:00Social media is everywhere.
00:02Sometimes I feel like I literally can't escape it, especially when it comes to dating.
00:07Before I go on a date, the very first thing I do is look at someone's profile, and it's
00:11hard for me not to judge them based off of their presence and the content that they post.
00:15Even though my social media presence is a big part of who I am, I wonder if it's being
00:19perceived the way I want it to be.
00:21Before a date, I find myself studying my own profile through their eyes.
00:25Do you ever do that?
00:26A lot of people use social media as a highlight reel, where everything has to be polished
00:31and curated.
00:32My friend Sydney posts freely on her Instagram and doesn't adhere to the societal expectations
00:37of what the feed should look like.
00:38I'm often being very silly and putting myself out there in a joking way.
00:44So what happens when it comes to dating?
00:46At what point do you let a guy follow you?
00:49So I panic when they first follow me and I'm like, oh my god, no, no, because it's like
00:54I put pictures of me painting my face in different colors and just things that I don't really
00:59want them to see immediately.
01:01But I always accept within 24 hours because I just feel like nowadays it's a little suspicious
01:05and a little kind of like what's going on if you just don't accept their request.
01:09So I do accept.
01:10If I'm going to be intimate with somebody and they really want to get to know me as a friend
01:13and we're really going to connect on a deeper level, I want them to get to know a more sensitive
01:17side of me before they kind of know my silly, goofing, you know, other persona.
01:22A lot of people use Instagram as this highlight reel.
01:24And I kind of just do the opposite and I just post imperfection.
01:28At the end of the day, you know, I like the image of me.
01:30And that's what social media is, it's just another form of expressing yourself.
01:33I want to express myself.
01:34I get this kind of urge to post and I get this, I come up with this caption that seems
01:39funny
01:39and silly and not like I'm taking life too seriously to me and to me I'm like, okay,
01:43I got to put it out there, like that's funny and I hope people enjoy it and at the end
01:47of the day I just have to remember like it's me and you like me or not, so.
01:51I think it's awesome that instead of trying to present a particular image out to the world,
01:55Sydney Postwood makes her feel happy.
01:57Although she may be insecure about it at first, getting to know someone she's dating and allowing
02:02them to see her full self-expression can be a way to connect on a deeper level.
02:06Like Sydney, my friend Andrew uses social media to show a side of himself that might not always
02:11come across immediately.
02:13But unlike her, he doesn't always get to choose when that side is shown.
02:17With 140,000 followers, Andrew's in the public eye.
02:21And with that comes a lot of misconceptions of who he truly is.
02:24What would I see if I saw you on social?
02:27I think you would like think definitely, what comes to mind is like definitely I'm like a
02:31lot more like extra.
02:32People would think I have like this like wild personality because of like my social media,
02:36but then like you meet me and we sit down and I'm like a little bit more like calm and
02:40relaxed.
02:41Have you ever considered not having Instagram on your dating profile?
02:44I feel like it's something that people are going to look me up and look it up, so I would
02:48rather get it out of the way.
02:50Like they see like a luxury lifestyle and a lot of people I feel like in the past, like
02:54even with friends, like I feel like you see for your money or all that different stuff
02:57or to go to events or be friends with like people I'm friends with or all different like
03:01Or to get followers.
03:02Yeah.
03:03Has your social media presence in terms of dating hurt you or helped you?
03:06I've known Tiffany Trump since I was three and I feel like just associating to that last
03:12name even though we've been family friends and it has nothing to do with my political
03:16views people will especially gay guys will jump to assume like like oh you're associated
03:22to Trump like that's like a huge no.
03:24I feel like worse than anything else on my social media.
03:28Seeing Andrew's online presence and then talking with him in person just goes to show that you
03:32can't gauge someone through their social media alone.
03:34But what happens when a person's social media presence is an accurate depiction of who
03:39they are?
03:39My friend Laura uses her Instagram to publicly tell her journey of her body positivity and
03:44to educate her followers about sex.
03:46My social media is really dedicated to my own personal definitions of body image and self-confidence.
03:53It's very public.
03:54It garners a lot of DMs from random people.
03:58Do you think that who you are as a person is very closely aligned with who you are on social
04:03media?
04:03I would say that it's maybe about 80% spot on.
04:07People are not seeing the like other side of what my personality is.
04:12In person I'm kind of like just kind of weird and silly and just kind of jokey and that doesn't
04:17usually come across in text and it doesn't usually come across in photos.
04:21What do you think if someone were to look at your profile what is the biggest misconception
04:24they might have of you?
04:25She has no problems.
04:27She's figured it out.
04:28There's never a bad confident day.
04:31There's never a bad body image day.
04:33She's not sad.
04:34Do you feel like your social media persona has helped you or hurt you in terms of your
04:37dating life?
04:38It's kind of 50-50.
04:40Because on my social media I'm so bold and confident and talk a lot about like body image
04:46and sex education people get really intimidated by me.
04:49On my social media I talk a lot about sex education and I am pretty open about not necessarily
04:54my personal sex life but about like my knowledge within the sex industry.
04:59People who go on my social media and want to date me are often like I wouldn't even know
05:05what to do in bed with you.
05:06I'm like the things I want?
05:07The things you want?
05:08Do you wish that people wouldn't see your social media before they went on a date with
05:11you?
05:12No actually.
05:13I kind of like when people see my social media first because it is a very easy way for people
05:19to be like oh okay I get it.
05:21Like I get who she is immediately without having to like condense my entire bio.
05:26I love how open Laura is on social media.
05:28Talking to her reminded me that we all need to be a little less judgmental.
05:32So when you're getting to know someone before or after the first date remember that social
05:37media does not paint the whole picture.
05:39It's an outlet for fun and for self expression.
05:42So take it with a grain of salt and make time to get to know someone in real life.
05:47We'll see you next time.
05:48Bye.
05:49Bye.
