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00:03Hello, darling. Can I help?
00:06Well, you could let me wash the sleep out me eyes, yeah.
00:08What, I'm spoiled that lovely come to bed, look.
00:11Why don't you come in and join me? There's loads of room in the bath.
00:14Going a bit over the top, aren't you?
00:16You're gonna set that wild husband on me, are you?
00:18He might have to be told, yeah.
00:20Hit me with his handbag, will he?
00:31Marvellous, innit? There's me dying to get in the bathroom,
00:33there's the bloke I'm frightened of, singing his head off like he ain't got a care in the world.
00:36Well, he's kind of like that, isn't he? Occupational hazard to him.
00:38Yeah, probably don't give a toss whether he's caught or not.
00:40Well, I don't suppose he'd be that pleased about it,
00:42but remember the old saying, if you can't serve your time, don't do the crime?
00:45Well, I wish he'd serve his time somewhere else.
00:47He's just asked me to have a bath with him.
00:50I told him you wouldn't like it.
00:52And what'd he say to that?
00:53Said something about you eating him with your handbag.
00:58Dad, I'm late for school, then. I can't get in the bathroom.
01:00Well, join the queue, darling. Den, you're gonna have to sort this out.
01:04Look, I talked to him yesterday, right? He reckons an habit he picked up in the nick,
01:06getting up early for his ablutions.
01:08Well, don't worry, he'll be gone in a couple of days.
01:09If he's not, I will be.
01:10You don't think I'm any happier about this situation than you are?
01:12Well, get rid of him.
01:14You know, up until now, I thought Roley was the only poodle around here.
01:20Oh.
01:27I thought you'd come round this house that'd soon cure you.
01:32I've got unemployed husband, an invalid mother and a pregnant daughter
01:34all lying upstairs, snoring their heads off.
01:38Shell!
01:39Mr Wonderful's here.
01:43Oh, dear.
01:44Do you know, I can't take much more of this.
01:46What bad is that, is it?
01:47Oh, bollocks.
01:48Honestly, you must be mad giving up your freedom
01:51for the responsibilities of marriage and a family.
01:53Well, no, Shell's going to be the making of me, isn't she?
01:56Yeah, well, I'll be sure of luck.
01:58Your life hasn't exactly been a bed of roses either, has it?
02:01I'd better go to work before I break down and cry on your shoulder.
02:05Oh, love.
02:06Listen, don't forget,
02:06the welfare officer's coming round later, yeah?
02:08Tell her I'll have to see you.
02:09Yeah, tell her.
02:10Glad you, Mum.
02:11You needed that.
02:13What's the matter?
02:13Don't you like her?
02:14She's all right.
02:16She makes me look at reality
02:17when all I want to do is run away from it.
02:20What do you do, mainly so early?
02:21Well, I've got more reality for you to look at, haven't I?
02:24I mean, what are we going to do?
02:26About what?
02:26Well, me not getting that job.
02:28It was only on medical grounds, weren't it?
02:31I mean, hundreds of kids get asthma and they get over it.
02:33They get good jobs too.
02:35I mean, some become athletes and footballers.
02:36Yeah, but I'm not a kid, am I?
02:38I'll make us a cup of tea.
02:44Mate, I expected something to turn up, wouldn't it?
02:47It's the first time I've ever looked for work, seriously.
02:49I mean, I'm a lot younger than your dad.
02:51Somebody's going to want me, aren't they?
02:53So what are we going to do in the meantime?
02:54Well, I'll stay on at the pub.
02:55That's why I come here so early.
02:57I want to get all this off your chest first, so...
03:00There's something I want to get off my chest too.
03:07Like what?
03:10I'm terrified of having this baby.
03:13Are you?
03:14Oh!
03:17I always thought you was really calm about that and that.
03:20What are you scared of?
03:22The pain.
03:23What newbie?
03:25Yeah.
03:26Yeah, just lucky I'm not a woman, I suppose.
03:29I'm not a woman either, am I?
03:30I'm just a stupid schoolgirl.
03:32Oh, God, I must have been mad.
03:35I'm a virgin to a mother in one fell swoop.
03:37Shel.
03:40Did you love him?
03:42No.
03:43Of course I didn't.
03:44Do you...
03:45Do you still think about him?
03:49Yeah.
03:50Yeah, I do.
03:52That must that must die.
03:53Got us to think about.
03:55That scares me too.
03:57Why, you're not scared of me, are you?
03:59I'm not scared of you.
04:00It's...
04:01Look at us.
04:02We're just a couple of out-of-work kids with a baby on the way.
04:05But I'm not a kid, show.
04:06I told you, you can be proud of me one day.
04:08You don't have to prove yourself to me.
04:12It's me I'm worried about.
04:14Hey.
04:19He's racing on telly this afternoon.
04:21Could you get hold of a sporting life for me?
04:23That's all been solved by now.
04:25Won't one of your mates have one?
04:27I'll see what I can do.
04:28Don't be too long now, will you?
04:30That's half the fun of the Gigi, sorting through the runners and the riders.
04:34Horses are like villains, you know.
04:35It's a good idea to team up with one that's got a bit of form.
04:39Well, I don't know how you can concentrate with all that lot going on out there.
04:41No, nothing concentrates the mind like three 50 quid doubles and a 50 quid treble.
04:45You see, I look on it as an art form.
04:48Cracking a safe or picking a winner requires a lot of creative effort.
04:52You need a lot of bottle.
04:54Oh.
04:54Yeah, it takes the same guts to go out on a big bank blag as it does to put a
04:58thousand
04:58quid on a horse.
05:00Yeah, I suppose so, yeah.
05:02If it didn't, you and all the other mindless mugs around here would be at it too, wouldn't
05:05you?
05:06My old man used to say to me, son, bet biggest when the odds are longest.
05:11Yeah, well, I value my liberty a little bit too much.
05:13Liberty?
05:14Liberty to do what?
05:16Scratch around pulling pints for all the pathetic punters down there?
05:19It suits me.
05:20It suits you because you've got no ambition.
05:22You've got no imagination.
05:23You don't want to be a folk hero like me.
05:26Folk hero?
05:27It's a bit strong, isn't it?
05:28Yeah.
05:29The train robbers were folk heroes.
05:31Last of the cowboys.
05:33Yeah, they've got 30 years, if I remember rightly.
05:36So how are you going to get your name up in lights around here?
05:39Why else are you treating me like royalty?
05:41Because I don't happen to want to have my ear holes chucked off.
05:43Well, there is that to consider, but you've got to admit there's a lot of romance in my business.
05:48I don't think I'd put you down as a romantic soul, no.
05:50Hurry up with that sport in life, will you?
05:52Yeah, can't wait to declare war on them boogies.
05:54Look, I'm not that happy about you treating me like your messenger boy.
05:56Just go and get the paper.
05:58And I'm not keen on you having to pop up my missus either.
06:00You're doing what you're told to do, little man.
06:02You're in way over your head, yeah?
06:05So you just keep schtum to good boy.
06:11What did you want to see me about?
06:13Look, we don't want to be disturbed.
06:15What's this?
06:16Has my luck changed?
06:17Am I being invited to an orgy or something?
06:19It's an orgy all right, mate.
06:21An orgy of fear.
06:22It's this protection money business.
06:24We're all frightened out of our wits.
06:26But they haven't been around lately, have they?
06:27No, that's the whole point of this meeting.
06:30I wish I had one team.
06:31All this waiting and wandering makes your flesh creep.
06:35Yeah, I know how you feel.
06:36Well, I don't seem to have worried you.
06:37I mean, you hit one of them, didn't you?
06:38That's why we've asked you to come here.
06:40Oh, they worry me, all right.
06:41I'm terrified what they might do to Cassie.
06:44So you're no braver than the rest of us?
06:46Oh, hell no one can be brave under these circumstances.
06:49Fear is their trademark, isn't it?
06:51That's why they haven't been around.
06:52They want to give us plenty of time to think about it.
06:55Look, what I did to that man was just on the spur of the moment.
06:59If I'd had time to think, I don't suppose I would have done it.
07:02These men are evil, but you're worse.
07:04You're all cowards.
07:06Mehmet wants to go to the police and to hell with the consequences.
07:09Look, I told you that's no good.
07:10Why is it no good? It's better than this.
07:12Look for the hundredth time, this is London, not Nicosia.
07:14There's a thousand muggers running loose out there.
07:17And all the law's got time to do is to protect the old-age pensioners
07:19who keep getting mugged and robbed.
07:21Exactly.
07:22But you're entitled to protection like everybody else.
07:24What happens when we open the cab business, eh?
07:27How much are they going to want from it?
07:28That's what we're here to talk about.
07:30Talk? What good is talk, for God's sake?
07:32I'll take the knife to their throat.
07:34Seriously, what do you think, Tony?
07:35Well, all right, all right.
07:37I don't know what...
07:40What is this?
07:41It's siesta time.
07:42Haven't you lot got a living to get?
07:45We're having a private meeting.
07:46Well, the only meeting I'm interested in is a race on this afternoon
07:49to tell you, then it's your sporting life, mate.
07:50Yeah, but you don't bet.
07:51I don't know how to ride a bicycle,
07:52but if you want to borrow me bicycle clips,
07:53I wouldn't stand here arguing about it.
07:54I'll lend it to you.
07:55So come on, mate, then it's your sporting life.
07:56There you go.
07:57Cheers.
07:57Thanks a lot.
07:58Cheer up.
07:59Might never happen.
07:59Soon be Christmas.
08:02Get ready.
08:04To play.
08:06What's the day?
08:09Thanks, Dan.
08:10Took your time.
08:12I'll give you a shower when I've picked me Gigi's.
08:15Yes.
08:16Much cleaner.
08:17Hello.
08:18Here's a try, too.
08:19Hello, Dr. Legg.
08:21Should be talking to you by rights for turning down Lofty.
08:24I mean, he had his heart set on that job.
08:25I wouldn't have asked my opinion if I hadn't been worried.
08:28He'd never have stood it, Pauline.
08:29The pressure would have made him ill.
08:31Yes, I know the feeling.
08:32I'm sure you do.
08:33And what are we going to do about that?
08:34What are we going to do?
08:35Same as always.
08:36Carry on regardless,
08:38unless, of course, you've got your magic wand with you.
08:40Yeah, I'll be ready this afternoon.
08:41Thanks.
08:42Look, whatever you do,
08:44don't say take it easy,
08:45because that's the one thing guaranteed to send me screaming up the wall.
08:49Half of that's an orange is petty, please.
08:51Oh, yes, and some bananas.
08:52Four, please.
08:53Busy man like you.
08:54Shouldn't be doing his own shopping, Doctor.
08:55Oh, I'm not too proud to do a few chores occasionally.
08:58Wouldn't tell that to some of them else chauvinists around here.
09:00Like my old man, for instance.
09:02Actually, the shopping's just an excuse to have a chat with the Pharaoh.
09:04All right, what's up, Doc?
09:06It's Pauline.
09:07I'm worried about her.
09:08My sister.
09:09Ain't nothing wrong with her, is there?
09:10Nothing organically wrong with her, Pete, no.
09:11It's a mental and nervous state I'm concerned with.
09:14Oh, liveries, mother.
09:15Drive anyone going to twist.
09:16Well, leave off, Cat.
09:17I ain't no laughing matter.
09:18I'd like you to relieve her of the pressure.
09:20Look, Doc,
09:20there's nothing in this world I wouldn't do with my sister.
09:22Nothing.
09:22No, me and all.
09:23I'd have got Arthur last time he was out of work.
09:25And how'd it wind up?
09:26Finished all of it myself.
09:27Well, it's not Arthur's fault, poor man.
09:29Unemployment is a curse.
09:31It's like an illness in itself.
09:33When the breadwinner loses his job,
09:35the whole family loses his dignity.
09:37Yeah, well, I can't see my sister losing her dignity.
09:39She's proud like our old mum.
09:40No, it's not her losing her dignity, young lady, Mark.
09:42It's losing her strength and her stamina.
09:44I mean, she's doing two shifts a day at the laundret now.
09:47And she's got Lou and Michelle to worry about.
09:49Well, you fart me now, Doctor.
09:51What can we do?
09:52Well, a couple of pairs of broad shoulders would do for starters.
09:55What if you popped in and saw her from time to time?
09:57Take to the pub.
09:59Perhaps occasionally you could take Lou off her hands.
10:02Oh, yeah.
10:02I hope you don't think I'm not doing my family duty, Doc.
10:05Pete, this is not a criticism of you.
10:07It's a cry for help.
10:09Before it's too late.
10:11Sorry, Lou.
10:13Excuse me.
10:14I'm just popping out for five minutes.
10:16Make sure it is only five minutes.
10:17I've got a lunch date, remember?
10:19I'm keeping eye on him.
10:20I don't want him straying upstairs.
10:23Oh, Den, I can't take much more of this.
10:25You are not the only one.
10:29Hello, darling.
10:30You're not usually an early drinker, are you?
10:33Here.
10:33You're not following yours truly down the rocky road to ruin, are you?
10:36You don't look much like a ruin to me.
10:38I wish I looked half as good.
10:39Well, for that little compliment, you can have a drink on the house.
10:42What do you want?
10:42Oh, thanks.
10:43Just an orange juice, please.
10:46Actually, I've come to have a heart-to-heart with Andy.
10:48Oh, I want love grand, eh?
10:50You tell me.
10:51We seem to love each other as much as Tom and Jerry at the moment.
10:53Well, you know what to do about it, don't you?
10:55Take your mind off it.
10:55What's that?
10:56Work.
10:57You finish the day knackered, you ain't got time to worry.
10:59Yeah.
11:00Where can I find work?
11:01Here.
11:02Where?
11:03In the pub?
11:03Yeah.
11:04Dinner time's in the odd evening.
11:06But, I mean, I haven't had much experience.
11:08Do you think I could go?
11:09Yeah, of course you could.
11:10You could do it standing on your head.
11:11Think what a treat it would be for the customers, eh?
11:13Why don't you have a word we name her?
11:15See if she can fit your house in.
11:16Mm, I suppose so.
11:17Well, you think about it, darling.
11:19Cheers.
11:22Blimey, this is a win-double.
11:24You come to see me twice for one day?
11:25You still haven't bought anything, now, have you?
11:27Well, that's why I'm here.
11:28Next time you're in the betting shop, stick us on three fifty-pound win doubles and a
11:31fifty-pound win treble.
11:32I've written the names of the horses down there and there's the dough.
11:34Three fifties and a fifty?
11:35Have you gone potty?
11:36This ain't your game.
11:38Let me be the judge of that, eh?
11:39Just do us a favour and do the honours.
11:40Whatever you say, buwana.
11:42Hey, and while you're here, I could use a favour.
11:44Or rather, we could.
11:45I'm sorry, mate.
11:46I banked on my takings last night.
11:47No, no, no.
11:47It's nothing to do with that.
11:49It's about this meeting we had today.
11:50It's about the firm.
11:51We want them off our backs.
11:53Well, I'm sure you do.
11:54But how can I help?
11:54Well, we thought you could use your influence, like, and have a word with them.
11:57You've got more sway than we have.
11:59I think we should go to the police, bring them to justice.
12:01There ain't no justice in this world, mate.
12:03We're not in this part of it, anyway.
12:03What do you mean?
12:04The police won't touch you?
12:05They've got to catch them first, and to do that, people like you have got to talk.
12:08Oh, talk?
12:09I'm not afraid.
12:09Yeah, you talk and they don't forget, because these people have got very long memories.
12:12They don't forgive and forget, you know.
12:13Can't you make them forget about us for a while?
12:15I mean, we're small fried.
12:16Dinner tenner a week.
12:17Hallie, you're a businessman.
12:18You can add up, can't you?
12:19210 pounds comes with a very large wedge every week.
12:23Can't you put in a word for us?
12:24Do you think you've got problems?
12:25If I told you my problems, your toes would curl up.
12:27I know people make this look like a brownie pack.
12:30All right, I'll see what I can do.
12:32I think about it.
12:34Here you go, Mosh.
12:35Thank you, Mosh.
12:36You're going to be bugged off your feet, lovely, aren't you, with Angie going out and no Wixie?
12:42Do they pay extra for days like these?
12:44No chance, Doc.
12:45Maybe I should be on double time, eh?
12:47He's really busy at the moment, and all.
12:48The place needs to be crawling with old Bill.
12:50Maybe they made it their local or something, eh?
12:52Well, look, just because you work for friends, you know, you don't want to let them take liberties with you.
12:56You can be too willing, you know.
12:58Where is Wixie, anyway?
13:00I'll then give him a few days off.
13:01Oh, like me.
13:02I'm going on holiday soon.
13:03Yeah, that's nice.
13:04Yeah, that's what you need, lofty holiday.
13:07I'll go and put in a word for you.
13:08No, don't do that, eh?
13:10There's a bit of an atmosphere around here today.
13:12You only make it worse, eh?
13:13It'll be all right.
13:14I'm very discreet.
13:15No, don't...
13:17Let's launch your new career in style, eh?
13:20Here, I'm going to have lunch with a licensed picture, so I might as well get myself in the mood,
13:23eh?
13:23Why not?
13:24What are you celebrating, then?
13:25Deb's here's going to be our new barmaid.
13:28Do you want a glass, Doc?
13:29Oh, I never touch the stuff.
13:30Tomato juice only for me.
13:31I'm very glad to hear your news, Debbie.
13:34Thank you, Doc.
13:34Yeah, especially as I was just coming to have a word with Angie about the subject.
13:38What subject's that, sweetheart?
13:39Well, it don't matter so much now, but I was going to ask you if you could go a bit
13:43easier on lofty.
13:45Doc, if lofty takes it much easier, he'll be in a permanent trance.
13:49Well, he seems overworked to me.
13:50I mean, the strain that's written all over him.
13:53What strain?
13:54I mean, it's the atmosphere around here.
13:56You all seem to be living on your nerves.
13:58Look, if I can help you in any way, don't hesitate to confide with me.
14:03I mean, after all, what are friends for?
14:05Oh, Doc.
14:07I choose friends who can mind their own business.
14:09Do you know what I mean?
14:11All right.
14:12Be like that if you want to.
14:13I'll apologise later.
14:15Is there anything wrong, Angie?
14:17No, no.
14:19I mean, Den's a bit edgy lately.
14:20Must be the male menopause, eh?
14:24Oh, Doc, I've been looking to you everywhere.
14:26We're becoming quite a lady of leisure, aren't we?
14:28What's happened to the laundrette job?
14:29You know perfectly well.
14:30Me nerves won't stand up to it at the moment.
14:32Well, that makes two of you, doesn't it?
14:33Nervous? I don't follow.
14:34Pauline is very nearly at the end of her tether, and now she's got to do your shift as well.
14:38Oh, I can't help that.
14:39I mean, I'm sorry for Pauline and all that, but I've got myself to worry about.
14:42With respect, Doc, I can see what Pauline's got to worry about, but what's worrying you?
14:46Well, I'm surprised you should ask me that, being me doctor and all.
14:49Oh, there's Nick disappearing again.
14:50There's all me money gone missing.
14:52Oh, there's so much.
14:53And which way to turn?
14:54Well, perhaps if you gave Pauline a hand again, it might help you to see things in perspective.
14:57Oh, I can't think about that.
14:58Not at all to me holiday, at least.
15:00What holiday?
15:01Well, I've asked the counsellor to fix me up for the week or two at the seaside.
15:03I'm entitled, you know.
15:04And Pauline is entitled to a damn sight more consideration than you're showing.
15:07Oh, she looks all right to me.
15:09Well, she may look all right to you, but I can assure you she's very nearly reached breaking point.
15:12She needs your help, Doc.
15:14Oh, don't talk to me about helping people.
15:15I've just offered to help Angie.
15:16She jumped down me throat.
15:18Help Angie?
15:18What do you mean?
15:18Oh, there's something fishy going on at that pub.
15:21A right den of iniquity that place is fast becoming.
15:23Help me in.
15:33Bloody police.
15:34They want shooting, the lot of them.
15:36Oh, don't mind me.
15:37It's unbelievable, isn't it?
15:39I mean, the streets are crowded with criminals, and they pick on an innocent bloke like me.
15:43Where do you work?
15:44Where do you live?
15:45There's been a lot of criminal activity in the area, sir, of a serious nature, sir.
15:48Only doing their job, Mr. Fowler.
15:50Well, they're lucky to have a job, missus.
15:51I wish I had one.
15:52That's just what Michelle and I were discussing jobs.
15:54She says she wants to be a children's nanny.
15:56Well, what's wrong with that?
15:57Don't you approve?
15:57Well, it's just that all the young mothers want to do that at first.
15:59I think it's got something to do with the maternal instinct.
16:02Mrs. Woods thinks I should carry on my education, even if I'm married.
16:05I thought we were keeping quiet about that one.
16:07Oh, there's no need.
16:08No reason to keep it a secret.
16:10Michelle says Alofty's not the father of the baby.
16:12They'll have to take her word for it.
16:13That means that he's got no responsibility towards the baby.
16:17So she won't lose out of it?
16:18Everything that she's entitled to, she'll get.
16:20Fertility grant, full-time education grant.
16:22She'll be assessed as a single parent till she gets married,
16:24and then she'll be classed as a married woman.
16:27Do you want to go back to school?
16:28I don't want to go back to my old school.
16:30No.
16:31We thought it better all round if she went to a further education college.
16:34Is that what you want?
16:35I mean, what about bringing up the kiddie?
16:37Oh, she can combine the two.
16:39Lots of people do.
16:41Well, she needs to carry on with her education, Mr. Fowler.
16:44They'll give her a better chance of getting a job.
16:46Do you know, my old mum couldn't tell the difference between a fraction and a decimal.
16:51But that didn't stop her bringing up a family.
16:53We've got to do that gas job, Scud.
16:56Oh, er, a nice little piece of props, yeah.
16:58If you don't mind, my mate here will go upstairs to suss the job out.
17:01Well, I'll show you what's going to be done, all right?
17:03Er, yeah, er, follow me.
17:09You can go out the top of the stairs.
17:11When you get to the top, turn right, OK?
17:13Well, Will's going upstairs dressed in his uniform, but he ain't coming down again, got it?
17:16He's going to be your mate instead.
17:18Yeah, I've got it.
17:18Will's going to be stopping up there for a few hours, and it's safe to leave, OK?
17:21Yeah, OK.
17:22Oi, Ben!
17:25Lofty!
17:26Serve the punters, please!
17:27I've only got one pair of bands, Steve.
17:29Well, then you'll have to sprout wings, aren't you?
17:31I'll be very busy out the bank.
17:32Busy?
17:32Who will?
17:33Whenever you mind.
17:33But you're only standing out there rabbiting, aren't you?
17:36Rabbiting.
17:36Look, it's a very important conversation out here.
17:38Oh, what's important about the gas man?
17:40Let me worry about that.
17:41Just move your arm, all right?
17:43Yeah, it's fine.
17:44Yeah, it's fine.
17:44Sorry, sorry.
17:45There's more wooden tops out there than there is at Ibrie on a Saturday afternoon.
17:48Yeah, and the bigger the villain, the better the class of copper that goes looking for him.
17:51Looks like we're going to have to stay stunned for a while.
17:53Well, how do you mean?
17:54Well, it's much too hot for us to go visit your little tradesman friends, innit?
17:58Ain't they going to be pleased about that?
17:59No, I thought you were told, sir, Jass.
18:00No, excuse me.
18:02Lofty, please!
18:02Get a move on.
18:04When we go, I'll be leaving an envelope for you.
18:06Contains a little present.
18:07Mark of appreciation for services rendered like.
18:10Oh, ain't they nice?
18:11Yeah.
18:11Ain't that nice?
18:13But then we're nice people.
18:14Ain't we?
18:15Uh, different class, man.
18:16Any danger, Dan.
18:18Different class.
18:19Yeah, sorry, Speedy.
18:20I was just saying that gas was a different class to electricity.
18:23Yeah, well, I've been trying to examine a gas in a glass of lager,
18:26but all I've seen to be seeing is, you know, scotch mist.
18:28Well, I'm sorry, Speedy.
18:29It's coming up for it.
18:30On the house?
18:30Yeah.
18:31Tricky job they're doing, is it, then?
18:33Tricky, isn't it?
18:34The gas job?
18:35No, it's just a little longer.
18:37Oh, I thought a boiler was about to explode or something, you know?
18:40Right.
18:41Oh, you're like a cat on hot bricks, my old son.
18:43Look, let me buy you a pint.
18:44Might calm you down a bit.
18:45My mate's finished now, so we'll be off, Gav.
18:47Er, thanks, but no thanks.
18:48I'll get the rest of your party later.
18:50Yeah.
18:50Thanks a lot.
18:52See you then, Gav.
18:53Yeah, be lucky.
18:54And one last thing before you go.
18:56Yeah, what's that?
18:57Your flies are undone.
18:59Is there ever so good of you to help us out like this, girls?
19:01Oh, don't be silly.
19:02You've helped me a hundred times.
19:04Anyway, it gives me a chance to talk Mary into coming to our sexy underwear party.
19:07Cash, I won't have to strip, will I?
19:10Hello, Paulie.
19:11Hello, Doc.
19:11Dr Legg says you weren't feeling too well.
19:15Hello, Kathy, Mary, what are you doing here?
19:17The girls are giving me hand, all right?
19:19And I've just been a bit run down lately.
19:21Well, there's no need to make me feel guilty.
19:23I mean, I'm on the sick list too, you know.
19:25There might be no blokes here anyway.
19:27It's an imparling.
19:28Well, what's the point?
19:29There's a load of women sitting round in sexy underwear, then.
19:32It's a silly, silly.
19:33It's a sales promotion.
19:35It's exciting here, isn't it?
19:36Exciting.
19:38I'm taking me holiday in the nick of time from the sound of it.
19:40It's getting more like Sodom and Gomorrah round here every day.
19:43Which reminds me, Mary, word with you.
19:47Over here, if you don't mind.
19:53What is it?
19:54I just want you to tell me it ain't true.
19:57What's not true?
19:58Oh, I don't know how to put it.
20:00Come on, Doc, spit it out.
20:01You're not often at a loss for words.
20:02Well, is it true that you're going to start to entertain visitors?
20:08I'm going to do what?
20:09I heard you're talking to Andy in the cab.
20:11Bold as brass.
20:12Well, you heard wrong, didn't you?
20:14Don't you dare insult me again, all right?
20:17Weekend away at the two, eh?
20:18Jan's going to love it.
20:20Service is rendered, eh?
20:21So he's gone.
20:22Yeah, and so's my old son.
20:23Oh, you've taken some risk in your time, mate.
20:25This time I thought you'd bet off more than you, could you?
20:27Yes, how did I?
20:29I waited here all lunchtime.
20:30I'm sorry, love.
20:31I can't get away.
20:32It's a wonder I'm not legless by now.
20:34I've been drinking champagne with Angie.
20:35Champagne, eh?
20:36Mm, celebrate my new job.
20:38I'm going to be barmaid here.
20:39Ah, good for you.
20:41Oh, you don't mind?
20:42Why should I mind, eh?
20:44Anyway, what's come on you then, waiting for me?
20:46Normally, you wouldn't give me the time of day.
20:47I'm just dying to know what you spoke to Roy about.
20:50Well, if you must know, I said I thought he was using you to fill in his career.
20:54In what way?
20:55Well, our wife wouldn't do these promotion prospects any harm, would it?
20:59I also said I thought he was an old-fashioned son.
21:03Do you know, that's just the way I've been feeling about myself.
21:06That's why I took the job here.
21:07Come again?
21:08I said I'm becoming an old-fashioned son, son.
21:12You, Debs, never.
21:14A quick and a pain of legs like you, my love, I wouldn't call him old-fashioned either.
21:18That's because you still fancy me.
21:20Hey, Dad, you can't get in your old age or something.
21:23Why, what's that?
21:24Well, there's another bog tucked away upstairs, and he's even uglier than the last one.
21:27Sharon, walls have ears.
21:28That's all right.
21:29Pete knows all our business.
21:30Here, enough about the walls, if you don't mind, mate.
21:32I'll be thick, not that thick.
21:34He'll be gone in a couple of hours.
21:36Hey, Pete, are you up to spend the evening at your place with him?
21:38Yeah, sure, Twiggle.
21:39Use it like home from home, mate.
21:40Well, can you use Kelvin as chaperone?
21:42Yeah, and thanks for being so nice to Mum.
21:44Nice to her.
21:45I'll flatten her when I get hold of her.
21:46Well, it's really sweet for you to book a proper holiday.
21:48She's going to love it.
21:49How did you find out about that?
21:50I saw an envelope on the table, I know.
21:53Then goes my weekend with you.
21:55Home with that.
21:56Yes, but he's on me.
21:58Oi, farm and cinema.
21:59Come on, darling.
22:00Keep going.
22:00I'm your best friend.
22:01Excuse me, Gat.
22:03What's your game, eh?
22:04What you plan?
22:04Are you going at last time?
22:05You don't come back till supper.
22:07Here.
22:08Do you know that meal was cooked by Sue and Ali?
22:09It was smashing.
22:10I have a good mind to do a deal with him.
22:12They can cook the pub grab.
22:13Sod, Sue and Ali.
22:14Where you been?
22:14That's what I want to know.
22:15Getting away from you and your blasted bank robber friends.
22:17Keep your noise down.
22:18Oh, what's the matter?
22:19Afraid the gorilla upstairs, my dear?
22:21He's already done it.
22:22He must have shut your mouth before I shut it for you permanently.
22:25Come on, what's all the shouting about?
22:26Oh, it's all right, darling.
22:27It's just Prince Charming here being his usual happy little self.
22:30Come on, Dad, not in front of everyone.
22:31It's not me, it's her.
22:32She started out in the pub.
22:34That's why I brought her around here.
22:35Yeah, you're so masterful, aren't you?
22:37He's my hero.
22:38Mind you, you well bottled out with a lodger, didn't you?
22:40Yes, he knocked you down a pig or two, didn't he?
22:44Have you looked at yourself lately?
22:45Look at that tassy old blouse.
22:46I'm going to stop them, Pete.
22:47They're destroying that, kid.
22:48Look, leave it, cat.
22:49I know how you feel, but leave it.
22:51We'll sort it out later, aren't you?
22:52Well, we can't all be like your precious Lady Mac, can we?
22:56So get naughty.
22:57Stop it.
23:07Hello, young lovers.
23:09All right, are we?
23:12What am I going to do?
23:14Look, you've both been having a bit of strain the last couple of days, mate.
23:17It's what you're going to do about Sharon, that's Maury.
23:19Sharon, what's she got to do with it?
23:21Everything, I should say.
23:22Everything.
23:23You and Angie will still be tearing each other to pieces when you're 70,
23:25but it's not fair on Sharon, is it?
23:27I'm telling you, Jane, it's going to be a flurry of time compared
23:29and she'll be off on her bike and gone.
23:31Yeah, well, I've had about as much as a man can take you one day.
23:42I'll be back.
23:43Come on, let's have some serving.
23:45Look, Deb's just gone.
23:46Lou, she'll be back in a couple of minutes and Deb's only a few yards away.
23:49Yeah, don't remind me.
23:51Listen, that little girl's too prim and proper for you.
23:53And as for him, he's turned this place into a lunatic asylum lately.
23:56Angie, if I go with you tonight, I'll just put me in a bloody straitjacket.
23:59Oh, dear, don't tell me you've bottled out and all, have you?
24:03I think I've had enough sight for one week, don't you?
24:05Yeah, and he's not as tough as he seems.
24:07He's been as weak as a kid in the last couple of days.
24:09Why, what's up?
24:10Come upstairs and I tell you.
24:14Andy, you can let me go.
24:22No, he's not here.
24:23And don't ever call again.
24:25Listen, I'm not playing goose for you all night.
24:27Look, we've just invited you round to take the heat off us.
24:30It looks better to me mum and dad.
24:31Oh, yeah.
24:32And what are you going to do when you want to warm things up?
24:34Well, I shall quite simply give my best mate the elbow one off.
24:38You planning to use hand signals?
24:39Or have you got something more obvious in mind?
24:41Don't worry, you are going to be well off the premises by the time the fun starts.
24:44Oh, speaking of the devil.
24:48Parents, I'm sick of them. Sick to death of them.
24:51Oh, I know exactly what you mean.
24:52I had enough around my dad this morning.
24:54Do you know, he's turning into a right impicked husband.
24:56He even wears the apron to do the washing up now.
24:58Yeah, well, it's not me round with them so much.
24:59It's those two fighting all the time.
25:01I'm not going to put up with it any longer.
25:03Well, Shannon, you could do worse than look for your real ones, you know.
25:05Oh, hang on. I don't want to fly in the nest, just yet.
25:06No, no, I'm serious.
25:07In some ways, you're luckier than me and him.
25:09At least you've got another set somewhere if you want to trade this lot in.
25:11Here, have a look at Kelvin's bought us.
25:13What's that?
25:14Oh, she's only a public and store, but she doesn't know booze from her bum.
25:16It's Bacardi, rum.
25:18Come on, let's have something that will loosen us up.
25:20No, thanks.
25:20I've seen what that stuff does to me mum.
25:22Oh, well, come on in, Ian.
25:23It's me and you.
25:24Hey, you can't drink it if you want to be a chef.
25:26Well, what's that got to do with it?
25:27Well, it's like publicans, innit?
25:29The wine's always available when you want it.
25:31Yeah, um, I suppose Shannon's right.
25:34I'll give it a miss.
25:35Oh, well, suit yourselves.
25:36All the more for me.
25:40Just the two men I want to see.
25:43Do you know that thing you asked me to look into?
25:45I've got some news for you.
25:46About the good news I got for you.
25:48You don't want to hear that first.
25:49What good news?
25:50Well, the bet I put on for you today.
25:52Oh, the bet.
25:54Listen to him.
25:55It comes to 1,238 quid less tax.
25:58Want to count it?
25:59Well, well, well.
26:00What a turn up for the book, eh?
26:02Drinks are on me, gentlemen.
26:03No, no, they're on me.
26:04I had a few quid on those horses of yours too, you know.
26:06And I feel out of place with all these nouveau rich men around me.
26:09Well, I've got some news that's going to make you a 10 quid a week better off.
26:11Oh?
26:12You know those unwelcome visits?
26:13Well, they won't be calling on you again.
26:14No?
26:15Not in the foreseeable future, anyway.
26:16Oh, how do you do it, Dan?
26:18I mean, first of yours, it's a nerdies.
26:20I'm beginning to see Mr Dennis watching a new light.
26:22What?
26:22My hero, you mean?
26:26Dan, you're a bum.
26:29Excuse me, gentlemen.
26:33Well, I'm glad I got a daughter, not a son.
26:36Oh, I'm sorry, mate.
26:37I forgot.
26:37Scotch?
26:38Yeah, it's all right.
26:39And do you know what?
26:39You're an even bigger bum than I said you were this morning.
26:42You said I was a pussycat this morning.
26:44Bum, pussycat, what's the difference?
26:46All I know is I'm ashamed to call you my dad.
26:49Have you been drinking, Carol?
26:50What if I have?
26:52What's that got to do with anything?
26:53I have never hit you in my life, but by God, this is the closest you've ever come.
26:58Typical.
26:59I'm supposed to be the mindless teenager and you're supposed to be the big adult, but who wants
27:03to use violence?
27:04Now, listen.
27:06Listen, good.
27:08I'm taking you home to your mother.
27:10And if she can't talk some sense into you, you can get out of my life for good.
27:14You can go to sea or you can go to hell, man, for all I care.
27:19Now, move.
27:24Have you got a minute?
27:25Calm, I'm off to you.
27:26Can't you see I'm busy?
27:27Yeah, there's something I've been meaning to ask you.
27:29No, no, no, no.
27:29Just because you're getting married doesn't mean to say you're entitled to a rice.
27:32No, no, no.
27:33It's about the gas man.
27:34What about the gas man?
27:36Well, he come to do a job upstairs, didn't he?
27:38Ten out of ten for observation, makers, makers.
27:40Well, you ain't got no gas upstairs.
27:42Thanks.