- 4 weeks ago
HUSH No More w/ Dr. Vanessa
#DomesticViolenceAwareness #BreakTheSilence #HUSHNoMore
What happens when a marriage that lasted nearly five decades is marked not by safety and love, but by pain, control, and abuse? In this courageous episode, we explore the hidden realities of domestic violence and the strength it takes to walk away—even after many years.
Join Dr. Vanessa Guyton and special guest Karol Brown-Jones as Karol shares her powerful story of surviving 48 years in an abusive marriage and the difficult journey of choosing herself, reclaiming her voice, and leaving the relationship.
This conversation offers hope to survivors and insight to families, friends, and communities who want to better support those experiencing abuse.
No matter how long you’ve stayed, you still have the right to leave, heal, and begin again. hushnomore.org
#HUSHNoMore #DomesticViolenceAwareness #SurvivorStrong #BreakTheSilence #HealingAfterAbuse #EveryoneHasTheRightToTellItAndHeal #HUSHNoMorewithDrVanessaAsk
#DomesticViolenceAwareness #BreakTheSilence #HUSHNoMore
What happens when a marriage that lasted nearly five decades is marked not by safety and love, but by pain, control, and abuse? In this courageous episode, we explore the hidden realities of domestic violence and the strength it takes to walk away—even after many years.
Join Dr. Vanessa Guyton and special guest Karol Brown-Jones as Karol shares her powerful story of surviving 48 years in an abusive marriage and the difficult journey of choosing herself, reclaiming her voice, and leaving the relationship.
This conversation offers hope to survivors and insight to families, friends, and communities who want to better support those experiencing abuse.
No matter how long you’ve stayed, you still have the right to leave, heal, and begin again. hushnomore.org
#HUSHNoMore #DomesticViolenceAwareness #SurvivorStrong #BreakTheSilence #HealingAfterAbuse #EveryoneHasTheRightToTellItAndHeal #HUSHNoMorewithDrVanessaAsk
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TVTranscript
00:02hey y'all i am back with another episode of hush no more with dr vanessa i love being on
00:11this show
00:11because i meet so many amazing survivors i meet advocates i meet people that's just doing some
00:16amazing things in our community so i love the show and i'm so glad that you all take the time
00:22to join us each week because it's important to have this the safe space to talk about things
00:27that's going on in our community and what i want to talk about real quickly is ctr media network
00:32because they're sponsoring us y'all so if you get a chance to check out ctr media network if you
00:37want
00:37to start a podcast they are phenomenal dr tina ramsey is phenomenal and i have really enjoyed
00:44being part of the ctr media network family so i encourage you to pop in see what's going on all
00:50of their podcasts and tv shows are really phenomenal and they're all family based so i encourage you to
00:57join all right so today we're going to get in it because i am excited to talk about this topic
01:04about survivors and believing survivors so i'm going to bring on my amazing guest it is rowena
01:13hello beautiful how are you today hi i think we got a delay and we tested it it is still
01:25act funny but
01:26thank you for joining us um i think the topic we believe survivors is so important and it's also the
01:33name of your organization so that's why i really wanted you to come on today and can you tell the
01:38audience a little bit about you who is rowena sure um so my name is rowena i am a 20
01:47-year army veteran
01:47i retired from the army reserve in 2020 i know i don't look it but i did um i served
01:54on two deployments
01:56um one to iraq and one to kuwait and um i've been an hr professional ever since i've always
02:03kind of been an advocate i'm a single mom to two girls one who is 20 and another who is
02:1112
02:11um been serving as an hr professional in both the civilian world and the military world for my entire
02:18career um and i love it and like you mentioned i am the founder of a a non-profit for
02:25believing
02:26survivors of sexual assault and domestic violence and just making sure that they know that we believe
02:32them i love it the couture curator she said thank you for your service so thank you for your service
02:38ma'am and for serving our country and army is always the way so one team one fight who i
02:44had to throw that
02:45plug in so why was it so important what defining moment said i need to do something because people
02:54do not believe survivors what made you do that i i think for me the the turning point really came
03:01which
03:01which probably came with a lot of military survivors in the military community was vanessa gian
03:07um in that case and i think that for me seeing military members seeing women seeing men
03:17have to go through hoops and in all these other things just to to prove their case and to have
03:24people
03:24leaders believe them um i think that's where it kind of started for me um i remember i actually had
03:32a male who reached out when the vanessa gian case happened and he's in the military he served um in
03:38the
03:38military and and he mentioned to me you know rowena there's so much i want to share there's so much
03:44i
03:44want to say but because i'm a male i'm not able to say it because i know i won't be
03:50taken seriously and
03:52i've had females in the military um who have come to me as well say you know i've you know
03:57i'm at
03:58higher rank or no one will believe me because i'm a pfc and this person is a senior leader so
04:05i think
04:06that's kind of what triggered me to to start the non-profit was hearing the different stories of
04:12military women um and men and veteran women and men as well that have struggled to come forward
04:19struggle to seek help because they're just scared of not being believed and on top of the challenges
04:24that we already faced with the military with seeking help you know that's just another roadblock
04:30that we have so i just started it because i wanted to let people know and let survivors know that
04:36if no
04:36one else believes them that we believe them the reason why to me you are so impactful is because
04:43you're not a survivor of military sexual trauma right and i think sometimes people feel like they
04:48have to be a survivor in order to help but you're an ally and do people ever do you ever
04:55talk about
04:55that like tell people that you're not a survivor but you're standing with them as an ally
05:00oh absolutely um i i tell them that all the time um whenever we start a conversation i always start
05:06with
05:07you know i am not a survivor of sexual assault i can't imagine that pain i can't imagine that trauma
05:14that you're going through um but i just want to let you know that you know whatever you need whatever
05:18kind of resource that you need or help you need um i'm here to support whenever they do share i
05:23do let
05:24them know that it is a safe space when they do share i also let them know that i have
05:32very many close close
05:34friends who i work with and who i partner with who are actually survivors of sexual assault who don't
05:40mind telling their story who are open now about sharing their story um one of them is a very good
05:48friend of mine named olivia and she is a senior enlisted person in the air force and she shares her
05:54story all the time about being a survivor of sexual assault and i think that having a survivor reach out
06:01to
06:01her and seeing the the things that she's accomplished even as a survivor and even struggling as a
06:08survivor um it kind of has them relate to her so i definitely have people that i have them reach
06:13out to
06:14but i think for me the main thing is just letting them know that even though i don't know
06:19what you're going through i still will always stand with you in and believe you um no matter no matter
06:25what yeah i honor you for that because sometimes people feel like they can't that they don't know what
06:31it's an experience they don't know what to say or what to do and you are an example of that
06:35um the
06:36couture creator said the stats for male sexual assault are astounding they really are and i'm
06:41glad rowena that you said that men come forward to you as well and they struggle with being believed
06:47definitely feel like they not always believe in women so it's not just the men and i see it all
06:53the
06:53time i am a survivor of military sexual trauma which most of my community know and i didn't tell because
06:59i definitely felt like i wouldn't be believed um because it was the post commander's driver and he
07:06was a staff sergeant i was private and he was the like the number one soldier on post like everybody
07:12loved him they weren't gonna believe me and i was in his room so i didn't tell but i really
07:18wish that
07:18i would have had an organization like yours to say hey come forward i believe you even if you don't
07:23report i believe you and so that's really big for me um so and that's why i talk about it
07:29all the time
07:30because we don't come forward for you talking to so many victims what have you noticed as a trend why
07:37people say they don't come forward there's actually two trends that i notice when people don't come
07:49forward the first one is especially in the military culture especially when i was going through and for
07:56several of my counterparts um who are going through at the same time the military teaches you that
08:04you can't report anything that you can't share anything that you have to keep everything to
08:11yourself because if you report it will make you look weak it will ruin your career it will have you
08:18lose
08:18your security clearance if you're in some of those positions that require security clearance so in your
08:23mind you're already ingrained to believe that i don't want to seek help i don't want to appear a victim
08:30i don't want to appear so i'm not going to share um at all so that's one i think it's
08:35just a culture
08:36that's ingrained in us to to make us believe that we shouldn't seek help because it could be a career
08:41stopper or a showstopper i think number two a lot of people don't report or or don't share or some
08:49of the
08:49trends that i'm seeing is just kind of what we're talking about today is that no one believes them um
08:56you
08:56can have that psc that i've talked to that will say that she was sexually assaulted by a lieutenant
09:02colonel or a colonel so who you're going to believe are you going to believe a lieutenant colonel or
09:06colonel that has these high accolades or are you going to believe that psc just just entered the
09:10military two weeks ago so i think for me it's intimidation um it's fear of reprisal when a lot of
09:18these survivors try to go speak up so i think it's just twofold i think it's the fear of reprisal
09:23um and i think it's the fear of
09:26survivors not being believed but i also think it's just the military culture that has you believe that
09:32it's not okay to seek help because it will ruin your career and you will appear um as being weak
09:38so
09:39i can speak and say for myself you know and for other women that i've talked to especially as
09:43a woman of of color um i keep a lot of things or they mention they keep a lot of
09:49things to themselves
09:50because we're dealt with a double-edged sword and we have to appear strong against our kind of parts
09:56so we often just keep everything to ourselves and struggle internally but that's some of the trends
10:00that i've seen so far thank you for sharing um i often wonder if because the culture is definitely a
10:07culture i know the military has tried to change the culture right by instituting programs for victim
10:13my advocates sexual assault response coordinators like they really tried but the culture is there
10:18right and and we know is there even though they say that it's not but i wonder if it's more
10:24individuals
10:26i think the military really want to try to change the culture but it's a challenge because you got
10:33people in there that are predators yeah i don't care what you say predators you have individuals that
10:40there that they sucked it up and drove on so they want you to do the same thing like they'll
10:45say hey
10:46i don't understand what you complaining for so there is a they've tried to figure out about our security
10:52clearances and for those who don't understand you have to have a security clearance to do certain
10:56jobs to get certain positions right so that is big even though they say that that's not true
11:02um it still happens and we also see that senior leaders are not held accountable
11:09when they do not go to jail they do not get discharged and those are the things that i really
11:15see like why would i come forward and put myself through all of this when nothing's going to happen
11:19you're not holding individuals right now you know and that was big i saw that a lot i saw because
11:24we're
11:25buddies i'm not going to do anything to you i'm going to let you off um that type of culture
11:29taking care
11:30of our own um i mean that and when you see that this person was sexually assaulted and they reported
11:37and their name was drug in the mud and they didn't get the support they needed that makes you not
11:43report as well because you saw what happened to the other individual and so those are some of the things
11:48that i actually have seen and experienced in at very high levels and i don't think people really
11:54understand that but those are some of the things that people don't come forward for um the katori
11:59creator she said it is a challenge to deal with those who use a system and take the focus off
12:03those
12:03who really need help and resources andy um it's a system
12:11and i think the system it has changed a lot over the years it's still changing like you said but
12:19before you know often when you have a sexual assault case the focus is used to be really on
12:26the predator you used to always see um you know not support for the predator but you used to always
12:34see the the victim blaming or you used to always see um the command crowding around and supporting the
12:41predator or the predator's name is the one that's all over the military base but you really don't see
12:48the support for the victim when they come forward outside of that victim advocate of course and
12:54in the sarc so i think it's really changed more over the years to focus on making sure that we
13:01support
13:02the survivor as a victim but support the survivor that we support them and provide them with the
13:08resources um and taking kind of the shift off of the predator and making it be more about supporting
13:14in standing with survivors so i think that that's definitely a shift that i've seen over the past
13:18few years too as well i think it's difficult when the survivor has to prove that it happened
13:26but the predator right the offender doesn't have to prove that they didn't do it's like automatic the
13:34survivor is on the defense they're having to prove that it happened to them and people
13:39people do take sides and that's a difficult place to be in i think and so how do we shift
13:46that and
13:46not only in the military that's in the civilian world as well that's what's really wrong yeah people
13:50say like that person didn't do it especially if they famous if they high ranking if they have money
13:56people swear that people don't crimes and i know people gonna get mad at me but you can't tell me
14:02that
14:03michael jackson wasn't guilty he rich and nobody don't think he did nothing and i don't care what
14:07y'all say with the movie out but it is really hard for people to come forward when you have
14:12a society
14:13that does not believe victims and and i get mad i was like how did you know was you there
14:22i struggle with that all the time like i struggle with especially in the civilian sector like with
14:27the celebrities i struggle a lot with that because there's so many times that we just don't want to
14:33believe that this person could actually do that and then we take the focus off the person who's actually
14:39going through it and put more of the focus on the celebrity because there's no way that someone like
14:45bill cosby who was a huxtables you know could have done anything that he did there's no way that p
14:51diddy
14:52because he was so popular could have done anything that he did and i think that um i guess that's
14:59another reason why i do feel it's important to believe survivors because i want to to put more
15:06of them and support more of them rather than focusing on the status of the perpetrator or not believing that
15:17perpetrator could actually do it or standing with the perpetrator because there's no way that someone
15:24who makes all this money or there's no way that someone who's high ranking could could possibly do
15:29anything like this so i think that's kind of been my focus too as well as making sure it's more
15:34on
15:34providing support for the survivor than the focus on what this perpetrator has or doesn't have so
15:42that's kind of what my thought process has been too as well when you said bill cosby um my family
15:48um i was at my grandma's house and it was a whole discussion about that bill cosby was innocent right
15:53they got mad and i was like what i didn't like was the way they did bill cosby by releasing
16:00the
16:00deposition when they told him that it wasn't but he admitted he admitted to drugging and raping them
16:04with so so you got by him and people still did not believe them they blamed them oh she wanted
16:14it
16:14they know how bill cosby was and they just wanted to be around a superstar they set him up and
16:20i'm like
16:20the man admitted that this was things that he did but even with evidence sometimes in our society they
16:26still don't believe survivors and i'm like what we got cases where they don't pay the victim off
16:32because they were guilty so they paid off right and they still will not believe and so i want to
16:40have
16:40a show where we talk about switching that switching that up where we're looking at loving on them you
16:46know and giving them that support right um when you you had mentioned p diddy how did you feel when
16:52that
16:52case came out um so p diddy was actually one that from the beginning i kind of had suspicions and
17:09and
17:09thoughts on um on the things that he was doing and then even going back to
17:16to bill cosby um sometimes we rely on the creditability of the people who actually speak
17:25out and saying well this person you know she's done drugs she's done alcohol she's not credible at all
17:33so i think some some of the survivors that came out against bill cosby um people in society said they
17:40weren't credible because look at their history look at the history of janice dickerson who was the famous
17:44model she's a crazy woman you know i think for a lot of survivors including was cited including my
17:51parents they didn't believe bill cosby until the african-american model beverly johnson came out
17:59and said that she did it so i think with that um with p diddy
18:18with p diddy like i really just felt um
18:26um i really just felt like sorrow and sadness for for passing and i think that even before the video
18:45was shown everyone said that
18:51everyone ruined her name i guess and everyone tarnished her name and everyone made it seem like
18:58she was really like only after money and she was only after what he could provide to her so there's
19:04no
19:05way that he could have done anything like that and it just breaks my heart that that's the mentality
19:12you know that society has towards like a lot of survivors it doesn't take you don't believe them
19:18until you actually have to see proof and that's unfortunate and that's the society that i actually
19:26see sometimes is that no one really believed cassie until they saw the video of p diddy um and what
19:32he did
19:33to her but she's spoken out numerous times but no action was taken and you know the video was shown
19:41so i
19:41think that's the struggle that a lot of survivors have like um i was drunk you know in this man's
19:49room or this woman's room there's no way anybody's going to believe me because i was drunk or even for
19:54tomorrow because my genes were too tight there's no way that my perpetrator could have taken off my
20:00genes so i'm not going to speak out because it was my fault and i think a lot of survivors
20:04believe that
20:05it's their fault and there's no way they can no one else will believe them so
20:11i think that's how i felt with p daddy was that she had to go through hoops just to have
20:17people
20:18believe her and it didn't work until the video came out so
20:24what i've realized there's a lot of things when it goes a lot of times power and control the more
20:31money you
20:32have the more power that you have over somebody um they also go after victims that people wouldn't
20:37believe so if there are if they're a prostitute if they're a drug addict if their dancer or if they've
20:45had a shaky history those are the ones too that they target because they know people wouldn't believe
20:51them and and people fall for it oh they were on drugs there was no way that this person raped
20:56them you
20:56know and so that is a pattern that people use to go after individuals like that and and it works
21:02it absolutely works and it just is crazy to me that that it works that well um and what i
21:10do like though
21:10when people come forward other victims will come forward when you have the courage to come forward
21:15others do right and others came forward about p diddy and people still didn't believe even men
21:20killed him he assaulted a lot of men and so people still do not believe that he did it um
21:28r kelly is
21:29another one um and so i pay attention how people don't listen to multiple victims not just one when
21:38you start getting multiple people coming forward and people don't believe it's like what is wrong with
21:43people yeah that's all i know i know i know it's so it's sad it's it really gets sad when
21:51you uh it
21:53really gets sad when you see that kind of things and those kind of things um even our president and
21:58you know i don't care i hush no more so sense to me if you want to but even he
22:02had allegations of
22:03sexual assault nobody cared they still voted him in you know the sexual harassment the way he talked to
22:09women yeah we know he was in them epstein files because he was on the island right along with
22:13everybody else but they just don't i don't know if it's that they don't care they don't believe
22:18or they don't want to believe they want to think the best of people sometimes that's not the good
22:22people and it just confuses me when individuals come forward and talk about people and how horrible
22:29they are and we don't do anything about it in our society yeah so this is strange to me but
22:36and i
22:36talk about them all i don't care who it is if i do i i don't care like it doesn't
22:43matter
22:43i do too i i i i have my thoughts on the one on on on that with the president
22:49but you know sometimes
22:50unfortunately with the climate and especially with the you know with the federal government
22:56you're still with the federal government i'm not
23:02and that's exactly why i'm not a sark i'm not a victim advocate i'm not a program that i'm not
23:08in
23:08a sexual assault program because i want to be able to say what i say period you know and i
23:12want to be
23:12able to support and i'll say yep i love the military i love the fact that i serve my country
23:18the best
23:18thing that i ever did but i will call out things that's not right yeah but and i don't ever
23:22regret
23:23going right here you know um what do you think about individuals who lie about being sexually assaulted
23:36um two to eight percent um and i always bring this up because somebody out there gonna hear this and
23:42say what about the people that lie right so let's talk about it about two to eight percent are false
23:47what do you think about that i i i think that it's unfortunate that those people um who do that
23:59you know report false claims i i think it's a detriment to those who actually want to come
24:04forward and who actually want to speak out and actually need the resources but i can't say
24:12that low percent two to eight percent is is small compared to the actual survivors who
24:24do decide to speak help and and and definitely small compared to those who don't decide to speak
24:31out and speak help so for anyone that that says to me you know well they've made false claims and
24:37and
24:37and and they've they've tarnished these people's names i'll say yes i understand that and yes
24:42that's unfortunate because it makes it unfortunate for people who actually need the help and need the
24:47assistance and want to report but now can't because everybody's going to think that this is just
24:54a false claim or just a lie so that two to eight percent compared to the large percent of those
25:00who are actually really assaulted and those who are assaulted and don't report is is small to me
25:07compared to you know those that that actually need the help and need the resources so that's kind of
25:12what i say to people when they tell me that i just i know it's out there but to me
25:18that's not
25:18that shouldn't be the focus on on on on supporting survivors of sexual assault it just shouldn't
25:25because then you take away the focus of of those who actually have claims that are true and put it
25:34back on the the two to eight percent of those that are false so they use them so i will
25:41tell you how i
25:42feel about it i i think if you come forward and lie about being sexually assaulted that you should be
25:49punished i think that you gave a testimony a false statement and i think that you messed it up for
25:56everybody else and i do not like it i do not approve of it and i'll call you out on
26:01it because you make
26:02the hard papers um and i when i'm training that's always the question well what about the ones who falsely
26:07reported so i'll address it because you have to address the elephant in the room and i'll tell
26:13them a story the about an investigation where it was the first serge we was in germany and she was
26:18the first sergeant she was cheating on her husband with another soldier and she got pregnant so she
26:24lied and said that she was sexually assaulted once they did the investigation they realized that she was
26:28lying they put her out of the military and i was glad they put her out of the military but
26:33there are cases
26:34like that that makes it bad for everybody else so i always use that example so i don't say well
26:38no
26:38it's never happened because it has it happens but that's why we have an investigation you come forward
26:44you report investigation an investigation should start and i'll always say that leave it up to the
26:49investigation sometimes they it's unfounded and they can't find enough evidence to prove it but you have
26:56to let the system work and do the system always work no because a lot of times the investigation come
27:03back
27:04um found it and it did happen and it did happen but i always tell people two to eight percent
27:09is
27:10not that many people and you really want to look at it from a perspective of fairness and not just
27:16assume that somebody's lying that's the first thing people want to believe that that's somebody lying
27:21and i just don't understand that and and if i look i always say if i sexually assaulted somebody
27:26you think i'm gonna come to work and say yeah i did it you think i'm gonna tell the police
27:30i did it
27:30of course i just oh never mind it just boggles it just boggles my mind just some of the things
27:40that
27:41happen so yeah and so it just it frustrates me i like boggle my mind i don't really use that
27:46word
27:46but i do like that word because it do how it's like in our brains like how is this actually
27:51happening
27:51so yeah for for you what is something that you always say when a person comes to you and share
28:00their story and they tell you what is something you always say what is like your staple
28:07my staple is it's a safe space you know i'm not i'm not a counselor i'm not a sark i'm
28:14not a victim
28:15advocate i'm not in your chain of command i'm not your employer i'm not your supervisor i'm you know
28:22maybe your friend i may be your sorority sister or maybe nothing to you at all but just know you
28:29know
28:29whatever you tell me it stays with me if you want to get support and you want to get help
28:34i can
28:35definitely point you in the right direction and and show you who you need to talk to and tell you
28:42who
28:42you need to talk to and those people that i share with you are people that i trust and people
28:48that
28:48i know and people that i know will support and will continue to keep it safe until you're ready
28:55to share so for me that's my staple is everyone just wants to have you know sometimes a safe space
29:01sometimes they just want to vent sometimes they just want to share sometimes they just want to let
29:06it all out you know and they might not be ready to report but i let them know when they
29:10are
29:11you know you can let me know and i can help you and i can walk you through the process
29:15and i can
29:17you know share people who have been through the same thing that you have been because i haven't been
29:21but i know people and i just because i haven't been through it doesn't mean i won't support you so
29:26safe space is my number one go-to that i share whenever anyone comes to talk to me about anything
29:31like
29:31that yeah i think it's important so for people to hear that for those who haven't come forward
29:37like some of the things that we say and so for me i always say i honor you in this
29:42moment
29:42i honor you for trusting me those who chose me out in this world to say to say this to
29:50and so i honor
29:51you and i know it's not easy and so and then wherever the conversation goes from there then it goes
29:57but i
29:58think it gives them like support and confidence that whoa i made the right decision to come talk
30:02to dr vanessa because i know it's not you come for it and so i always want them to feel
30:08loved
30:09like i just want you to feel safe and loved when you're coming to share with me and that's what
30:14safe
30:15spaces yeah that's big yeah we just love okay all right um have you ever um talked to people about
30:22how do you respond like how do people how should people respond do you have an opinion on that
30:29when somebody come and tell them that they've been sexually assaulted
30:36um i always tell people don't don't let your emotions show i guess that's kind of the best thing
30:44um or don't let your emotions or your biases play a part in what that survivor is coming to you
30:52for
30:53so they might share gruesome details of what happened or they might share details that sometimes you may
31:01find hard to believe you know they might share details that they've never shared with anyone but don't
31:09don't don't rush to judgment don't rush to bias because really at that moment in time they consider
31:15you like i said a safe space and they consider you a listening ear so just listen and and that's
31:21it
31:21don't have reactions don't say things you know well you know i'm gonna go go fight this person
31:28per person we're gonna get you the help that you need or i'm going to tell this person here
31:39so they can help you start let them guide you bit listen so
31:48i always tell people you don't always have to have to be a good listener and to be a good
31:53support system
31:54you don't yeah i like that um i always say people don't want to hear your opinion
32:01like when people say well if i was if that was me i'll do this and i wouldn't do this
32:05and this
32:06it's all about love and kindness so how i always suggest that you respond is how can i help you
32:11what
32:11do you need from me and they may say just to listen they might say to go to the police
32:15they may say
32:16to help me find counseling found some resources and so i think it's important that we ask people how can
32:23i
32:23help you what do you need from me right and sometimes just to sit with them and that's okay
32:28you don't always have to ask and and just to love them and be a supporter so is there anything
32:36that you
32:36want to share with the audience before we get out of here like your last perspective and maybe something
32:41about um we believe you supporting our survivors
32:48yeah so my last perspective um is one vanessa i always like to thank you for providing these spaces
32:56for survivors i like to thank you for honoring i love that word that you use for honoring survivors
33:03and in supporting survivors and just from final words um from me it's just continuing to
33:10to believe survivors and sometimes that might not be easy you see sometimes that that means that you
33:21have to take the road less traveled you have to take dance against someone else you have to take a
33:27stance
33:27against everyone else but believed and that they have a space where they can come to um
33:37um for the non-profit i do need volunteers i am you have the email listed below so so if
33:50you are
33:50interested in volunteering just
33:56please feel free to reach out i'm in the mayor and b so that's all the work yet
34:01all right thank you so very much thank you for what you do for survivors it means a lot because
34:07survivors are not always heard and so thank you so very much and y'all she do need volunteers she
34:14do need support so we believe you supporting our survivors is a great organization and so reach out to
34:19her if you would like to support okay um i want to transition because tomorrow is denim day and for
34:26those who do not know um denim day is the day that we wear jeans in honor of survivors to
34:32support them
34:32there was a court case in italy where the offender got off because the judge said that
34:41there was no way that this person this this lady was sexually assaulted because her jeans were too tight
34:48and it was unfortunate
34:51so the parliament came and all the women in the parliament came and they wore jeans
34:56to demonstrate against the um the council and it's a really big day for us and it's something
35:04special so tomorrow we're asking you to wear jeans and to take a picture you could tag hush no more
35:10you
35:11could you could tag us you could do a hush a hashtag little hashtag a hashtag hush no more um
35:17but
35:17show up for survivors tomorrow if you are a survivor show up for yourself or show up for a family
35:23member
35:23or a friend when we see those showing up for us we're more likely to look at you as an
35:28ally and to
35:29be able to come to you for support so it means so much so tomorrow is denim day and i'm
35:36gonna have my
35:36cute jeans on so wear your jeans in honor of survivors i always say we're standing with survivors and
35:44would love to see you could tag my personal page to uh vanessa dine vanessa dunn guyton and
35:50just show out tomorrow in your jeans and be cute and this is for men and women because survivors uh
35:56are female and men okay so i really do appreciate you all and i look forward to hearing from you
36:03please share the podcast um support support us because we need the support we need survivors to
36:09know that we are here to love on them especially during sexual assault awareness month and so this
36:14is one of my business month of the year because it's big it's big that we advocate for those who
36:20can't advocate for themselves or stand beside those that are advocating for themselves and believe
36:26survivors please believe survivors um it's not for us to judge that's why you have a jury that's why they
36:33go and do an investigation it's not for us to make the decision about who is telling the truth or
36:38not
36:38it's about us to just stand and love and we lead with love and kindness and that is how we
36:43change
36:44the world um thank you um couture creator she said thanks a million for all you do and we appreciate
36:50you for being on tonight and just supporting us and supporting survivors so y'all know we are at
36:55hushnomore.org if you need support you can follow us on social media and i would love for you to
37:01be a guest
37:02if you are a survivor of military sexual trauma we are starting to get the names of survivors who
37:10would like to be in our documentary or in our book so you can go to bitly bitly h-n
37:16-m-m-s-t so hush
37:18nomore mst and fill out an application and we would love to have you on our documentary on our in
37:24our book
37:25because the story should be told thank you so much varinas for supporting us tonight and joining us
37:31it means a lot to me that you come on and y'all be safe peace and blessings to everyone
37:38and know
37:38that you have a right to tell it and you have a right to heal