- 3 days ago
G'wed Season 3 Episode 6
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:06This Tuesday, our very own Amy Morris makes her debut in the Priscilla Presley musical.
00:13Priscilla, untold.
00:16However, her road to stardom has not been a smooth one.
00:20Nay, it has been paved with tragedy.
00:23At the tender age of five, she was cast in the school nativity, but not as Mary.
00:28Amy, that coveted role, went to arch acting nemesis, Millie James.
00:36Amy was cast as...
00:39Palm tree to...
00:41Fuming.
00:43I can see the performance.
00:45Trees don't talk.
00:47Yeah, well, this one does. And I'm still not as wooden as your Mary.
00:51To the year eight talent shop, when Amy stunned everyone with her performance of...
00:56Never enough!
00:59For me!
01:01For me!
01:05For me!
01:07And you, baby.
01:11But just hours before the show, Millie James as Nan tragically lost her brave battle with Parkinson's disease.
01:18For fuck's sake!
01:20And just like that, Amy's performance was forgotten.
01:24Year ten! And after absolutely no coercion, Mr Dunn cast Amy as Sandy in Greece.
01:31Racist against gingers, are you sir?
01:34Think gingers are too revolted to play a lead role, do you sir?
01:36No, no. It's yours.
01:39Finally, a chance to leap an unforgettable mark on that stage.
01:43But then, Mason Paddy got so nervous, he couldn't go on as Danny Zuko.
01:47For fuck's sake!
01:48So up stepped Millie James, to deliver another show and performance.
01:53You!
01:54Tell me more, tell me more, did she put up a fight?
01:59Shud-bop-bop, shud-bop-bop, shud-bop-bop, shud-bop-bop.
02:03But despite these tragedies, she has risen from the ashes like a liver puddle in a phoenix.
02:08And we are so happy for her.
02:11She really deserves this.
02:14Oh my goodness!
02:16Oh my goodness!
02:17Oh, give a fuck!
02:18Oh, I'm dead proud of you, Kim.
02:23You were fought so out for this.
02:25Thank you, girl.
02:26And even if you shit, I'll still give a sound an ovation.
02:28And if no one else joins in, I'll be ripping our chairs and smashing them over people's heads.
02:33You were?
02:44Boys!
02:46Amy's got her big musical.
02:47My Louise is on her way to playing for England.
02:50They're chasing their dreams, making things happen.
02:53And we're just sitting here, rotting.
02:55Do you know what, lads? You're spot on.
02:56Yes.
02:57I'm running out of time to scrounge one of your Mars arses here.
03:00Perfect.
03:01No, no, not just your Mars.
03:04Any older bird?
03:06Imagine I actually did it.
03:09Instant cult status.
03:10And I'd have achieved everything I had ever wanted at the tender age of 16.
03:16Listen, I'm not talking about older women's arses.
03:18I'm talking about dreams that actually matter.
03:21Dreams that make you proud to wake up in the morning.
03:23Look, school's nearly done, and we've got one shot to make something of ourselves.
03:28That's why I'm going to be making calls, emailing start-ups, and you lot should too.
03:32Because sometimes, it's just one phone call.
03:37One choice.
03:38That can change your life.
03:40Hmm?
03:51I know what you're doing, my Louise.
03:53What are you following me?
03:54I've got eyes everywhere.
03:56Your mum?
03:57Mr Meacher?
03:58The fella who owns the shop you just bought your crisps from?
04:02What's the sauce, eh?
04:04I didn't know it was back.
04:06Oh, people say the same about me chlamydia, Trace.
04:08This is your second strike.
04:10What, for a chlamydia joke?
04:11No.
04:12You missed Saturday's training.
04:14Nah, see, I had this meat thing that I had to go to.
04:16See, we had this party for her, because she's just got the main role in this musical.
04:19What do you need to tell me that, my Louise?
04:21I want a cancelled train and brought the old squad to celebrate with a big banner.
04:25Congratulations, my Louise's mate.
04:27In fact, we might rename the old club after her.
04:30All right, Trace, I got it.
04:32But do you, though?
04:33Because this is it, my Louise.
04:34Crunch time.
04:35The week you find out if you stay with us, there's no going back.
04:39No redos.
04:42Look.
04:44It's okay to feel the pull of fun.
04:47But there's a difference between thinking about it and letting it stop you doing something special.
04:53I know it's hard, but I also know what you're capable of, so don't waste it.
04:59All right.
05:01I won't waste it.
05:03Good.
05:04I'll see you tomorrow.
05:05Tomorrow?
05:06Just the last game of the season to win the league, no big deal.
05:09Do you not read the WhatsApp group?
05:11The game got moved forward to Tuesday.
05:12Their first team needed a pitch for a cup game.
05:14Yeah, but what about-
05:15Is that a problem?
05:18No.
05:21I'll see you then.
05:33Hello, Mrs Fassi.
05:35I'm calling from IT Support Services at Allsbrook School.
05:38Uh-huh.
05:39I'm afraid Mo's been using the laptop we issued him with to look up sexually explicit content,
05:44which has now spread a virus on the school system.
05:48For now, there'll be no further action, but can you open up the search history on the laptop, please?
05:54Yeah, um, okay.
05:55Can you please read out anything you identify as porn content so that we can cleanse the files from the
06:02school system?
06:02Hi.
06:04Hi.
06:06Um...
06:07Natural tits girl sucks a thick rod.
06:11Three on one rough anal with DP.
06:14Oh.
06:15Oh.
06:16Boys, boys, boys.
06:17What are you doing?
06:18Big ass V-Cake.
06:21With squirting and smashing.
06:24Cream Pie Compilation 6.
06:27What is the matter with you, son?
06:29Mum is...
06:30Shut up.
06:30What?
06:32Hello.
06:33I think we've got all we need.
06:35Bye-bye.
06:38You can't even focus long enough to finish your homework, but you made it all the way to Cream Pie
06:43Compilation 6.
06:45Don't.
06:46I told you that'd be funny.
06:48Okay, it was funny.
06:49We can't exactly ruin Mo's life on our CVs, can we?
06:52So can we please start thinking about our careers now?
06:55Do you know what boys he's writing on?
06:56We need to start thinking about our future.
06:58Yes, Connor.
06:59And I need most of those that big ass V-Cake Link.
07:02You little must.
07:04Can you believe it's actually tomorrow?
07:07What if I wake up and I can only speak Japanese?
07:10I've heard that can happen, you know?
07:11Yeah, I don't think that can happen, girl.
07:14Hey, listen, though.
07:15How would you feel if I said that I couldn't make it tomorrow because all that sleeve match got pulled
07:20forward?
07:22Well, obviously, I'd never speak to you again.
07:25Go through me phone and delete every photo of us.
07:27Then sign up for some top-secret experiment to have your memory swipe so I never need existence.
07:32Okay, so you'll be all right about it then.
07:35I can't make it up to you, I promise.
07:37Honestly, girl, it's hard.
07:38We're both doing what we've always dreamed of.
07:41Yeah, suppose so.
07:43I'm thinking of the positives.
07:45You not being there means one less person, Charlton.
07:48Show us your tits!
07:49Don't lie, don't lie, don't lie.
07:54What if I completely mess this up?
07:56Like, fall over or forget the words?
07:57Amy, stop it.
07:59Don't let nerves get in the way.
08:01You've got to focus.
08:02You've got no idea how far this opportunity could take you.
08:06You've worked too hard to bottle it now.
08:16This is just the sort, you know.
08:17I always knew you were destined for big things.
08:20And together, we can take on the world.
08:23World domination sounds boss, Mum, but right now,
08:25I tell if I'm not falling flat on me arse.
08:29I'll go and get you to drink.
08:31You need to hydrate to calm your nerves.
08:41All right, James?
08:43I know you don't want me there tonight, love.
08:45And I really hurt, because I think about all the times I helped you get ready for shows in your
08:50bedroom,
08:52practising lines with you till you finally got them right.
08:57I suppose I just always thought we'd be sharing this moment together.
09:02Look, I'm so proud to be your dad.
09:04And no matter what happens between us,
09:08you'll always be my little girl.
09:10Remember that?
09:12I love you.
09:17I love you.
09:43I love you.
09:43Oh, love you.
09:44Come here.
09:45Look at me.
09:46I'm a man.
10:01Excuse me. Is there a cloakroom?
10:07No idea. I've only just learned that this bit's called the foyer.
10:11Oh, sorry. I thought you were an usher. It's the... the shirt.
10:15Oh, yeah. To be mad, I said I have to test my for a teaser.
10:20So, you don't mind if I sneak in some vodka?
10:23No, no, no. I, um... I've smuggled with it, you know.
10:27Oh, yeah? Yeah. Harry Bowl. City mix.
10:31Two packs. Oof.
10:32Two packs. You know, I, uh...
10:38Do love a bad boy.
10:47Lads. Who was that?
10:50I think I'm in, you know.
10:53Right, girls, I am buzzing that it all comes down to this.
10:56Because if you want to be champions, this is the type of game you should live for.
11:01Big games make big players.
11:04Here's the team.
11:07Oh, my goodness.
11:10What? I'm not on the team?
11:12What about everything you said yesterday?
11:14I meant every word.
11:15But you know how we do things here?
11:17And your running stats last week don't touch skies.
11:20Come on, you know I'm well better than she is.
11:21Who cares if she runs? She still can't cross for shit.
11:24I care.
11:25Because their number 11 is going to cause us all kinds of problems.
11:28And I know she'll track back.
11:34Oh, your southern face has more intensity than your sprints.
11:57Excuse me, madam. I'm at what you hear, and there's been rumours that you've smuggled in some vodka.
12:02Oh, no vodka. The only thing I've smuggled in is these two right melons.
12:07Want to see if you can find the pips?
12:13Are you enjoying the show?
12:15No, to be honest, I'm struggling to stay awake.
12:17Why don't I give you my number? Maybe you could tell me something to stimulate me.
12:21Yeah, I'm the meme king. I'll sort you out.
12:23Not memes. I'm after something a bit more personal.
12:27Oh, like a compilation of my best FIFA rage quits?
12:31No, thanks. I want something a bit more impressive.
12:34Me and them eight hot dogs in under two minutes.
12:37How about just one big hot dog with plenty of girth? Standing proud.
12:44One big hot dog. Standing proud. Got it.
12:55What was that? You can't drift your way through this, Amy. This is your chance. What's going on?
13:00Mum, did you really mean it when you said you couldn't face the idea of having any more kids?
13:06Of course I meant it. All I've been able to think about is being your mum again.
13:12And that's why I care so much about you not throwing this chance away.
13:16Now, come on. Get yourself together.
13:20I can't always be a...
13:22Can I have a feeling?
13:24It's really hurting here.
13:25I can't. I don't think I can go back on.
13:28Right. It's your moment, Maya Louise. Get out there and change this game.
13:33Let everyone see the fire I know you've got.
13:37And fucking track back.
13:39You're supposed to be in defence. What are you doing?
13:41What are you doing?
13:42You're a little bit.
13:44You're a little bit.
13:46You're a little bit.
13:47You're a little bit.
13:47You're a little bit.
13:48You're a little bit.
13:48Right, listen up.
13:49Yeah?
13:50Oi!
13:51Do you want to know why we're losing?
13:53It's not because the better.
13:55It's because we're not enjoying it.
13:59We're playing it like we're afraid to make a mistake.
14:02And do you know what, girls? I get it.
14:05Soon we're going to find out if we get another year.
14:08But fear never wins matches.
14:11Do you see how many little girls were out there watching us?
14:14I mean, they're going to love playing now, but you know what happens next, don't you?
14:17They're going to get to like 13 and most of them are going to quit.
14:22I know, because that's exactly what I said.
14:25So when I struggled with being the only girl around ours who played.
14:29And I struggled with needing the extra fight to get stuck in with the boys.
14:31Do you know what?
14:33I struggled with puberty when suddenly I was more bothered about my body than football.
14:39And that's why this game matters.
14:41We're playing for those little girls who are going to hit that moment and they're going to feel like walking
14:46away.
14:46Look, we owe it to them so that when that moment comes, they're going to remember us enjoying ourselves.
14:53And they're going to keep going.
14:55So when we get back out there, I want to see the reason that you fought so hard.
14:59The reason that you battled through that judgement.
15:02The reason why we're here right now in this dressing room.
15:07Because we love playing.
15:09So whatever happens in our careers, let's make this moment the one that we look back on and think thank
15:15God we didn't quit when the world told us to stop.
15:18Come on, Gail!
15:20Gail!
15:22Gail!
15:22Come on!
15:23Gail!
15:23Gail!
15:58Gail!
15:59Tip from an old pro.
16:00Shoot from the base, lads.
16:03Gives it authority.
16:04Like it's lead an army of flattered cocks.
16:08Drop some coconut oil on it, lads.
16:10Get that bad boy shining.
16:18When I first met you, I thought I could choose how closely live.
16:22Oh my God!
16:23I've got an interview tomorrow for a junior marketing assistant position.
16:26Some Indian company.
16:27What?
16:28How have you blacked that?
16:29I don't know.
16:30Must have been one of the startups I emailed.
16:32I told you, if you put yourself out there, it could set you on your path.
16:38What?
16:39What are you doing?
16:44I was already on my way to you.
16:56Maybe I didn't treat you quite as good as I should have.
17:08Maybe I didn't love you quite as often as I could have.
17:19Little things I should have said and done.
17:23Little things I should have said and done.
17:24I just never took the time.
17:30You were always on my mind.
17:33You were always on my mind.
17:40Maybe I didn't hold you.
17:46All those lonely, lonely times.
17:51And I guess I never told you.
17:57I'm so happy that you're mine.
18:02If I made you feel second best.
18:06And I'm so sorry I was blind.
18:12You were always on my mind.
18:18You were always on my mind.
18:22Tell me, tell me, tell me that your sweet love hasn't died.
18:33You were always on my mind.
18:39You were always on my mind.
19:09Oh, I'm impressed you could get it done into attention so easily.
19:12You know, that's what I've got on me locker.
19:14Big strength for mine.
19:15Well, you can get back to mine and fuck me senseless.
19:20Like, now?
19:21Yeah, now.
19:22And I hope you've got some stamina because I want a right good pounding.
19:25And that is just my arse.
19:28We've done a 5k in school.
19:30I come top ten, so.
19:31That is impressive.
19:33You should be able to keep up with these lads then.
19:36Hey, fellas.
19:37Looks like we've found the four.
19:49What's going on?
19:51That's Lorraine.
19:52Ted's neighbour.
19:53We sorted her some tickets in exchange to make your dreams come true, lad.
19:56Nice one, Lorraine.
19:57No, lad.
19:58That is all that cougar chat done now.
20:00You couldn't handle it.
20:02I actually sent it in a ticket.
20:04What she gave you was me old Android.
20:06Don't worry.
20:07Oh, mate.
20:08Oh, lad.
20:09What are you doing?
20:10You're supposed to send it hard, not on flop.
20:13What is hard?
20:14Oh, you poor little fella.
20:18Oh, my God.
20:20Well done.
20:21You know you made Mo cry?
20:23Oh.
20:24No.
20:25You smashed it.
20:26Well done.
20:27Honestly.
20:28You were amazing.
20:30Oh, my God.
20:31Move out of the way.
20:35Move out of the way.
20:36Come on, ambulance.
20:37Come on.
20:39Oh, my God.
20:40What's happened?
20:40Don't you dare pretend to care about us?
20:42What?
20:43This is because of you.
20:44You liar, Amy.
20:46Just fuck off, will you?
20:47I don't ever want to see your face again.
20:49You lying schemer, bitch.
20:52Dad?
20:54Dad?
20:59As you know, the decision of whether you stay with us for another year isn't solely about
21:04talent, it's about attitude.
21:06And it's fair to say, with you, we've had our ups and downs.
21:09It's a bit like my niches every time that we meet, Trish.
21:12Give it a rest for the next ten minutes, please.
21:14Sorry.
21:15Yesterday's game was a great example of when your attitude's right, you can really influence
21:21a game.
21:21Influence?
21:22Girl, I wanna see.
21:24Let's not beat around the bush, Trish.
21:25We're all made to ya.
21:26Anyway, we've discussed your future at length.
21:30And we'd like you to stay on with us for another year.
21:35Right.
21:37Erm.
21:39Okay.
21:41That's it.
21:43I was expecting a smile, at least.
21:47I just...
21:49Nah, I'm not sure.
21:51You know, you've kind of made me realise what this life might actually be like.
21:55Don't let the doubts creep in again.
21:57Yeah, but the doubts are there, cos...
22:02I don't want it enough.
22:04Do you realise you're walking away from something that could define you?
22:08But I don't want football to define me.
22:12To do it, it has to be everything.
22:15Like your world and your life.
22:19Football is a part of me.
22:21But it's not all of me.
22:25I have other things to offer the world and...
22:28I don't want a life where I never get to explore those things.
22:33Well...
22:34This is a first.
22:37But then, so is a player who thinks it's funny to keep insistence of the club doctor that she's pregnant
22:41with my child.
22:47You know, to be so young and strong-minded, to not let anyone dictate what you feel or do...
22:55It's impressive.
22:57Don't lose it.
22:58It'll serve you well.
23:00And whatever path you take, I'm sure you'll make your mark.
23:08Thanks, Trace.
23:10Take care, Maya Louise.
23:21Careful who you mess with, Maya Louise.
23:24They'll never blink first.
23:27Impressive.
23:32She's busy doing okay now.
23:34Yeah.
23:35Keeps calling her a karma heart attack.
23:37You know, cos it was mild.
23:39Thinks he's dead funny.
23:41Now you'll understand why I left.
23:45Sorry.
23:48Mum.
23:49I don't care if you've had or wanted more kids.
23:53It's the fact that since you've been here, all you've banged on about is how you can't have more...
23:56Cos all you care about is a relationship with me.
23:58I'm not having IVF.
24:00I went to one appointment.
24:02Me partner wanted kids.
24:03We tried, but...
24:04Partner?
24:04You never even told me you'd have one.
24:06What's he said about you being here?
24:09He doesn't know, does he?
24:10He pushed me for IVF.
24:12But I wanted to focus on you instead.
24:15I've been spending the money on us.
24:16Aww.
24:17Those moments mean so much more now, knowing you robbed someone blind to do them.
24:21I'm sorry.
24:22What about the letters?
24:23What's true and what's not?
24:26I only sent one.
24:30You wanted to turn me against me dad.
24:32Make me think he's been hiding things from me.
24:34No.
24:35It wasn't like that.
24:37I needed you to believe that I never forgot you.
24:40That even if I didn't write, you were still in me head every single day.
24:46That's some twisted logic, that, Mum.
24:47I know.
24:49And I know I've been selfish.
24:51Always chasing after some life that I thought I deserved.
24:55And all I've got to show for it is wasted years and hurt the people that mattered.
25:02And when I saw you'd been cast, I thought, this is my opportunity to make it up to you.
25:10You know what you're chasing.
25:12And if I could just be a little tiny part of that, then maybe all my mistakes might feel so
25:18worthless.
25:19Is that so wrong?
25:22To want just for once, not to fail you?
25:42You either didn't get another year, or someone spiked your oat milk with full fat.
25:54Yeah.
25:54I'm sorry you didn't get it.
25:56I know how much it meant to you.
25:59Did you?
26:01Yeah.
26:05But I turned it down.
26:08If you're taking it away from people like you, we want it more than I do.
26:11Yeah, well, maybe that's my problem.
26:13I want it too much.
26:15There's nothing wrong with that, girl.
26:16There is if you're putting it in the wrong place.
26:19Like, I just thought that if I was perfect off the pitch, then I'd be perfect on it, but it
26:23doesn't work like that.
26:25You just need to be a bit more unprofessional like me, girl.
26:28Yeah, if only I'd constantly know it to dressing room by going on a bar of butt plug shaped like
26:32a golden booth.
26:33I still think that's a really good idea, you know?
26:40Remember that loads of players get released and go on to smash it.
26:43Just because they said no doesn't mean they're right.
26:45Thanks.
26:49But also work on your touch, your decision making, your positioning, your awareness, your finishing.
26:55I know that I'm your homie.
26:58I ain't just gonna let that go.
27:02Cheers for this.
27:04Builders are making too much noise at ours.
27:06Plus I can't handle my grandma flirting with them again.
27:09New buddies.
27:13Good luck.
27:17Hello, Christopher.
27:19Hello.
27:19Hello, can you hear me?
27:21Yes, yes, I can hear you.
27:22Apologies, I'm in a cafe in Delhi and the Wi-Fi is not so good so the video may be
27:27not working.
27:29So, let us start.
27:31It's say on your CV you having the Indian heritage.
27:35Yeah, I'm an eighth Indian through my great granddad.
27:39Sorry, very, very bad connection.
27:42You say half Indian.
27:44That's fantastic.
27:45We love doing business with our own.
27:48I'm good but...
27:49Actually, I'm not.
27:50No need for this posh London accent.
27:53Just use your own Indian accent.
27:55Oh, I'm okay.
27:56I'd rather just...
27:57Christopher, we have many peoples who are wanting this job.
28:01You understand?
28:02If you're not interested...
28:03Oh, no, no, no, I am.
28:04It's just, I'm not sure...
28:06Because, you know, Indian accent is sometimes getting a very bad reputation in business.
28:10But we at Apathania Media are very passionate about changing that.
28:15Because we're proud Indians, aren't we?
28:18Aren't we?
28:19Yes.
28:20And so it is vital that we embrace the accent.
28:25Yes.
28:30Yes, very good attitude.
28:33Very good.
28:34So, let's do the role play.
28:36I am customer.
28:38Hello.
28:39I run a small cafe.
28:41No customers.
28:42No eatings.
28:44Please tell me how you save my business.
28:47Oh, hello, madam.
28:48We do big marketings.
28:50Many eatings, yes.
28:52Great, Christopher.
28:53Very good.
28:54But sometimes our clients are liking more energy.
28:58You know?
28:59Understand like the Bollywood spirit.
29:02Oh, what do you want you get?
29:03I sing it.
29:04We make your cafe famous.
29:07Many people coming.
29:10Bigger, please.
29:11More energy.
29:12We make your cafe famous.
29:17Everybody coming.
29:20Lad!
29:21Hey, you're not going to have a career now, lad.
29:24You're getting cancelled.
29:25Recorded it.
29:27That's what you call revenge.
29:29Hey, if that was porn, it'd be called one-eighth indie and get screwed and humiliated.
29:36I'm still taking you to therapy, lad.
29:39Oh!
29:40Oh!
29:41Oh!
29:44Oh!
29:45Oh!
29:46Oh!
29:56Oh!
29:57Oh!
29:57Oh!
30:00Oh!
30:01Oh!
30:02Oh!
30:02Oh!
30:03Oh!
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