- 9 minutes ago
The Vampire Lestat Interview Episode 1 Engsub
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00:00Watch The Vampire Lestat After Dark on AMC Plus or wherever you get your podcasts.
00:11Previously on the show formally titled Interview with the Vampire.
00:15So, Mr. Dulac, how long have you been dead?
00:18The year was 1910.
00:20Louis, let me introduce you to Mr. Lestat de Leoncore.
00:23What exactly is the nature of your relationship with my brother, Monsieur Leoncore?
00:27I can swap this life of shame.
00:28Swap it out for a dark gift.
00:31Be my companion for all eternity.
00:34He had a way about him.
00:35Preternaturally charming, occasionally thoughtful.
00:37He was my murderer, my mentor, my lover and my maker.
00:40All of those things at once.
00:42Claudia was everything.
00:44The life of a vampire has its challenges.
00:50Can an immortal meet mortality?
00:53Theoretically, it can be done.
00:55But could it be done by us to him?
00:58Paris was an awakening for Louis.
01:00Paris was many things in those days.
01:04Bonjour, mon amour.
01:06Are you schizophrenic, Louis?
01:08I could feel the movement of air with his movements.
01:11His breath on the back of my neck.
01:13We were on trial for murder.
01:15Love has always been difficult for me.
01:17My first paramour.
01:18Nicolas Delafonte, a violinist.
01:24You left him there so he could destroy it.
01:31Yes.
01:32You saved Louis.
01:33Banishment.
01:35But not her.
01:37Who made you?
01:38His name was Magnus.
01:41He took me from my room in Paris as I kicked and screamed.
01:44The light's going out of your blue eye.
01:47I've come to kill you.
01:48I have the blood of Akasha in me.
01:51He didn't save you.
01:53Lestat did.
01:55I'm guessing you haven't heard from my maker.
01:57I shouldn't have left you alone with him.
01:58Make it up to me.
01:59We'll do a follow-up book.
02:01No companion enough for myself now.
02:02I'm sorry I don't have much time.
02:04I'm in the middle of rehearsing.
02:05I'm going on tour.
02:06We'll just need about 50 more years of practice.
02:23I'm a little killer.
02:25I'm a lonely one.
02:28I'm a children of your spine.
02:30Telling you to run.
02:31I'm a little shadow.
02:33I'm a last line.
02:35I'm a past and the future.
02:37The last and the sutures are cool and dead.
02:39Where the rock and roll is.
02:41Where they get paid.
02:44Where the heart of me love and the face of the mud.
02:46Where they're stupid, right?
02:49Baby.
02:50Baby.
02:52Baby.
02:53Baby.
02:54I'll fall down.
02:58Burn the ground.
03:02I'll fall down.
03:05I'll fall down.
03:07Burn the ground.
03:09Bang bang.
03:12Bang bang.
03:14Bang bang.
03:15Bang bang.
03:15Bang bang.
03:16Hmm.
03:18C'est cool.
03:32That's cool.
03:33Bye.
03:34Bye.
03:35Bye.
03:36Bye.
03:38Bye.
03:49Good evening.
03:51The house wishes to extend its gratitude to the gathering
03:54for your compliance with the unorthodox prerequisites
03:58of tonight's event.
04:00Furthermore, we wish to reiterate that the anonymity
04:04that you have granted us will be given to you individually
04:07as well as to any institutions that you are representing.
04:11Stating the obvious, we are not here and neither are you.
04:18Lot one of two, the master recordings of the complete works
04:23of the Vampire Lestat de Liancourt,
04:25which includes his 2025 self-titled album,
04:28The Vampire Lestat, additional session tracks
04:31that were discarded in the final assemblage of the album,
04:34original handwritten scores and private recordings
04:36by the Vampire Lestat himself, which include a song cycle
04:40in the classical vein set to the poetry of Baudelaire.
04:47Before we begin the bidding, I perform the following action.
05:03We will begin the bidding at 1yuan.
05:07Do I hear 1yuan?
05:11B-U-N.
05:12Sold, to the gentlewoman, third row, good spirit.
05:18Lot number two, a music box curated by the Vampire Lestat himself,
05:26a 1978 Fernando Marchani Corinto sideboard,
05:31inside a Rosner and Zonn Mott turntable with Bialab 90 speakers.
05:38Two, temperature-controlled wine cabinets,
05:41one holding a bottle of Kneeport 1863 port wine,
05:46the other with a magnum of blood from the curator himself.
05:50The upper level,
05:52a singular vinyl pressing of the complete works
05:56of the Vampire Lestat de Leoncore previously delineated,
05:59along with 111 albums of audio best described as
06:04an omniscient history of the events of the 2025 album
06:08and supporting tour
06:10and the consequential global catastrophes
06:13that sprung from said album and tour
06:15as narrated by the Vampire Lestat himself.
06:19The collection has been named
06:22The Failures.
06:23We will begin the bidding at 50 million yuan.
06:29If you are hearing this now,
06:32you must be a very privileged individual.
06:35You could have fed a small nation for years
06:37while they paved over the rubble.
06:39You bought my box instead.
06:41I like you already.
06:44So let's begin in the middle.
06:46For I could and should have ended it there.
06:49My tour, my hedonistic pursuit of extremity.
06:53All of it.
06:54And had I done so,
06:56the regretful dead and the traumatized still alive
06:59would be somewhere other than they are today.
07:02And I am not saying that the attempted extinction
07:05of the Y chromosome across the continents
07:07was all my fault.
07:08Now that would suggest a level of self-importance
07:11even I'm not comfortable with.
07:12But upon reflection,
07:14I made a contribution.
07:16It was the spring of 2025.
07:20A good nation was making itself great again.
07:24Again.
07:27And every vampire,
07:29those converting and those enduring,
07:32well,
07:33they were doing exactly as they pleased.
07:38And again.
07:38And it's been a gladius a학.
08:06That's the opportunity I noticed.
08:06Ooh ooh ooh, wah ha
08:10Ooh ooh ooh, wah ha
08:14Ooh ooh ooh, wah ha
08:20I've got a long face, my pretty baby
08:25I've got long face, come up reason
08:29Remember long stings, that doesn't faze me
08:36I'm an actor and I make her
08:40I get fat to her when we break her
08:45What does it matter who I take her?
08:49Naturally I named the band after myself
08:52And the four that backed me played their parts as instructed
08:56There was Larry, the front man made sideman
09:00Choking his guitar neck nightly, wishing it was mine
09:03Brother Alex, the more talented seedling
09:07Straight-edged in half the fun
09:10Salamander, bassist, dumb
09:12Shockingly dumb
09:13And TC, the abandoned bride of a dozen should have died in art school bands
09:19Keeping us all in the dirty pocket
09:21We dropped songs on the streams and booked intimate venues
09:25To induce what Jen's snooze called FOMO
09:28They came for cosplay left converted
09:30And I baptized them, the beautiful unwell
09:33And yet, here we were
09:35In the inn of the stooges and the stripes
09:38Thirty performances notched
09:40And already resting on the alps of adequacy
09:44Unacceptable
09:44Un piano
09:46Un forte
09:48Un alegro
09:50Un mandante
09:53Un balero
09:55Prostitué
10:00In the inn of the stooges
10:09Hello
10:10Welcome to Detroit
10:12Lovely city
10:13Your song sucks
10:14Thank you for the feedback
10:16Pick up the pace
10:17Pack up the gear
10:18Give me some face
10:19A souvenir
10:20Here come the gaze
10:21Here comes the fear
10:22To the end of the stooges
10:26To the end of the stooges
10:27To the end of the stooges
10:29To the end of the stooges
10:39To the end of the stooges
10:41To the end of the stooges
10:42To the end of the stooges
10:43To the end of the stooges
10:43To the end of the stooges
10:43To the end of the stooges
10:44To the end of the stooges
10:46To the end of the stooges
10:47To the end of the stooges
10:47To the end of the stooges
10:49To the end of the stooges
10:51To the end of the stooges
10:55Oh, yeah.
10:56Oh, yeah.
10:56We're coming.
10:57Yeah, we're coming.
11:01Oh, yeah.
11:03Oh, yeah.
11:05Oh, yeah.
11:06Oh, yeah.
11:07Oh, yeah.
11:08Oh, yeah.
11:14Well, that was boring.
11:15Are you seem to like it?
11:16Harmonies on Plastic Fiends were trash.
11:19He's right. And the front head on your kick
11:20is shimmering, turning up his step.
11:22Singer's right.
11:23You left your tambourine in his stand, Larry.
11:25Yeah, I was feeling the guitar.
11:26No one is coming to hear your guitar, Larry.
11:29No, they come for the Aussie shit.
11:30Do rage call the Harmony Room, Larry Slater shredding it tonight,
11:33and no one ever.
11:35You sign the checks there.
11:36I do, I do sign the checks.
11:38The tambourine tomorrow is rehearsed and perfected.
11:41When am I singing?
11:43You're back in Corvallis.
11:44Brian the wife, early retirement, and her lawyer, Lake Boat.
11:47Use the pen.
11:48But it's funny because it's blood and I'm a, um, liar.
11:51Notarizing Oregon, notarizing red ink.
11:54There's the band, and there's the shell
11:56that protects the band from the world's envy.
11:59Our band shell was Christine Clare.
12:02She hired, fired, dictated, and castrated
12:06with extreme prejudice.
12:09Try your best not to be you tonight.
12:10We want the car.
12:11No.
12:11We'll be gone.
12:12Corvallis.
12:14What do you think?
12:15I'm a little!
12:17I'm a little!
12:18I'm a little!
12:18I'm a little!
12:20I'm a little!
12:21I'm a little!
12:21I'm going into my vampire dressing room, huh?
12:24A little draining both ways.
12:27You'll have to guess who gets the fangs
12:28and who gets the vodka bottle.
12:30And yes, it's a vodka bottle.
12:34He did it again.
12:36Fucking asshole.
12:37Did I mention that I was filming a documentary at the time?
12:40A bootless errand helmed by a first-time director.
12:44I've seen a rough cut.
12:45Truthful and daring, with less war and pity.
12:48Anyone see Yarda?
12:49Yarda!
12:50Sky blue waters!
12:53Where?
12:54Missing a contact again.
12:56Oh.
12:58How many drinks have you had?
13:00Uh, one and a half.
13:01Drive to the Burbs, sit by yourself in a booth at Applebee's,
13:03order the usual, big tip, meet us back in the city.
13:07Now you'd think a 54 City Rock tour would be a wonderful cover for a blood drinker.
13:11Hide your keel up on the bus,
13:13wave to the morgue reports in the rear view mirror, that kind of thing.
13:16But niche celebrity is a hunter's handicap,
13:19and a sloppy night in Corvallis made urgent the need for a body double.
13:24His name was Yarda Klapek,
13:26and the Albanian gangsters Christine hired to find my doppelganger
13:29found him working construction in the Czech Republic.
13:32Three inches shorter than your velvet mouth narrator,
13:35we fit him for lifts, blue eye contacts, and a wig.
13:39And otherwise, let him be Neanderthal me.
13:42I hunted this way and we sent him that way,
13:44and every sad photograph uploaded to reddito discord
13:47of Yarda eating up tuna melt by himself
13:50only confirmed for most what they already believed.
13:55Let's go!
13:55That I, the Vampire Lestat, was Daniel Malloy's fictitious creation.
14:01And the Vampire Lestat band was fronted by a brick-laying karaoke fanatic from Ostrova.
14:06Nothing but a desperate cash grab at the end of a chuggy vampire fad.
14:10And I've only myself to blame for the timing,
14:12having locked us in an attic for a year-plus perfecting our sound.
14:16A sound I hope would counter Mr. Dulac's portrayal of me as a mayonnaise villain with sociopathic tendencies.
14:24I'll beside the point, because the point was, the point forever is...
14:28I know you're real!
14:29Most of humanity moved on from vampires.
14:32And rather quickly.
14:34Congratulations.
14:35Now go make friends.
14:38They lifted their heads from their algorithmic handmasters,
14:41uttered a collective, huh, and swipe left.
14:45I am the Vampire Lestat.
14:48I am a god.
14:51Gods are not swiped.
14:54The Contessa!
14:55The Useful Idiot.
14:58Great show!
15:00You left before we started.
15:02Yeah, I figured Spotify some T-Rex and drag a little old nag from Dr. Fareedgood here.
15:06Save him, Jeff.
15:08I am not here.
15:09Can we mic you?
15:10TC punched the boom again.
15:12Yeah, okay.
15:19So, uh, you and Louie talking again?
15:23He doesn't return my texts.
15:25Or my telepathy.
15:28I hear he's back in the States.
15:32We good?
15:33We're good.
15:34It's late.
15:37Okay.
15:40You've been alive and undead for 265 years.
15:43You witnessed the French Revolution first hand, the electric light, penicillin, two world wars, the atomic bomb, the moon landing,
15:52the Berlin Wall...
15:53Joey Chestnut.
15:54What?
15:55He eats hot dogs for a living.
15:57He's extraordinary.
15:58I hope to meet him one day.
15:59Was there a question?
15:59Having accumulated profound wisdom and experience through the dark gift of immortality, why have you chosen to waste at singing
16:07music no one wants to hear in pants no one should ever squeeze into?
16:11You ask this question every night.
16:13And I get a different answer every night.
16:14You get me to repeat myself soon enough.
16:16I am sure once you confront your transformational trauma.
16:19I don't have transformational trauma.
16:21That's why these movie producers hired you to animal or a vampire slayer.
16:25They said you requested me.
16:28Absurd.
16:29Oh, as absurd as a documentary about a rock band posing as vampires fronted by an actual vampire.
16:36Directed by a vampire passing as a human.
16:39You tell him for me.
16:41Is it true you were a stutterer as a child?
16:44Louie said you were.
16:51Was he there in 18th century Auvers?
16:53He said you told him that.
16:54Did I threaten Claudia with rape on a train?
16:57Was I in the room when Donna Zetti wrote Don Pasquale?
17:01No, no, and impossible because I had buried myself underground for the vast majority of the 1800s.
17:08I wrote what he told me.
17:10I don't have trauma.
17:11I love being a vampire.
17:13And can you drop the fledgling speak and spell?
17:22The dark dreary industrial world has finally submitted to automation.
17:31Laborers stand in their doorways hitting their pipes as their children have pipe in their drained empty swimming pools.
17:40Drugstores locked up baby formula and shaving cream while Saks ate Barneys and someone told everyone that Lululemon was sexy.
17:51Facts are irrelevant.
17:55Facts are irrelevant.
17:56Fields are everything.
17:58And the value of human life?
18:01It has never been more arbitrary.
18:05David, Freddy, Prince Rogers.
18:08They're all gone.
18:10And the lights on Tete's ears have dimmed.
18:13Fire coming down the hill.
18:16Water moving in on Nantucket.
18:20No more safe spaces.
18:24It's my era.
18:26Now.
18:30Host Malone and Jelly Roll playing there tonight.
18:33$60,000 for a face tattoo Palooza.
18:36You played an 800 seat venue.
18:38How is it your era?
18:43I'm vain and shallow and pure an empty seat.
18:45Ask me an easy one.
18:48Is it true your band was formed on Halloween?
18:57You are listening to The Failures.
19:01Album 2.
19:02Side B.
19:26What do you think?
19:28It's nice.
19:30Nice?
19:31Yeah.
19:31It's nice.
19:32I don't see Beyonce covering it.
19:34But it's nice.
19:37Nice is nothing.
19:39It's nice.
19:40Nice is a balloon.
19:40It's your back writing music.
19:42A flower box is nice.
19:43It's nice.
19:43You got yourself a nice place.
19:45It's a nice word.
19:47And it says everything I wanted to express.
19:49Don't be a bitch about it.
19:52You should come visit.
19:54I have a space above the bed in one of the guest rooms.
19:57I can't find a painting for her.
19:59Oh, a guest room?
20:00You want me to come and see your guest room?
20:03It's an awful in the neighborhood.
20:05Old money.
20:07Young professionals.
20:08A smattering of Christ a trust from baby.
20:10Good eating.
20:14Same potholes.
20:15No hurricanes.
20:16But no hurricanes.
20:18No witches.
20:20And everyone mangles French just like you do.
20:23Come to me.
20:24Montreal.
20:26I am he, and he is me.
20:30That's baggage here.
20:31I get it.
20:32I get it.
20:34Besides, there's an Olmstead Park nearby if I get homesick.
20:38And there's a garage band rehearsing across the street
20:42who call themselves, of all things, Satan.
20:47They call themselves, of all things, Satan?
20:50Satan's night out.
20:52Satan's night out?
20:53Out.
20:54Satan's night out.
20:55Okay.
20:56It makes sense.
20:57Louis, do you know someone called Daniel Malloy?
21:02Uh...
21:03I burned his laptop!
21:04I didn't know he had it saved in the cloud.
21:06I only found out it was coming out a month ago.
21:08You've known for a month, and you talk about me and it to a mortal?
21:11Well, yeah.
21:12Uh, yeah.
21:13Gonna...
21:14You know?
21:14No, I don't know, Louis.
21:17Please...
21:17Explain yourself.
21:18It's gonna be here and gone in a minute.
21:20No one reads anymore.
21:22The stats, he's like whatever.
21:24100%.
21:25But Armand...
21:26He's kind of mysterious.
21:28Yeah.
21:28There's layers.
21:29You're right at the Louvre.
21:31And all the boomers did the show
21:34to go see the other good woman with his resting butt face.
21:37I skipped that, and I was going to see my beautiful boy in the room.
21:40Mmm.
21:43I would do it.
21:44You have to do it.
21:45You have to do it.
21:46I would kill him.
21:48I would kill him.
21:49I would kill him.
21:49I would kill him.
21:50I would kill him.
21:50And I would kill him.
21:55I would kill him.
21:55The stat, man.
21:57He would have had to burn his French accent on rural street.
22:00100%.
22:00How many wildsleeves are there?
22:02Huh?
22:03Do you want to become a member?
22:05There's 10%...
22:05No, thank you!
22:11Huh.
22:14Oh, I know what infinitesimal means.
22:18It was raining.
22:20No!
22:21No!
22:22Never!
22:26Fucking!
22:27Leia!
22:28Not a harlequin.
22:30Your sources are your sharpens.
22:33Your editor is your priest.
22:36Don't go to the F.
22:38Jesus out!
22:40Why must you complicate it?
22:42Hmm.
22:43Twenties!
22:45Can you please?
22:47Hello.
22:51Hello.
22:52Oh, I wanted the full-size bar.
22:54Is that a two?
22:58Thank you!
22:58Oh.
23:00Your camera is not period correct.
23:03How do you know the allergies?
23:04Well, allergies are delusional.
23:07Take the mounts.
23:08You'll take whatever I give you.
23:11Yeah?
23:11Well, it looks fine.
23:32Goddamn!
23:34Goddamn!
23:44Go!
23:53Yeah, what the f.
24:03Get up the fuck!
24:05Deep, minor, trash!
24:10This is in 1979.
24:12Bela Lugosi is not dead.
24:14You don't need to finger her for five bars.
24:17You're hurting her.
24:20Is that her neighbor?
24:22Apologies for the squire.
24:24My man, Arturo, will come in the morning with a replacement and a new front door.
24:31More frequent showers?
24:39What was the question again?
24:41Why music?
24:42Hey! Hey!
24:45Why now?
24:46Dude, that was sick.
24:48What are we doing here?
24:51We're doing a rewrite.
24:54So this whole tour is just some ironic reaction to my book.
24:59Who better to refute the book than the man who wrote the book?
25:04Hmm.
25:05The songs are my story.
25:07Your documentary, The Liner Notes.
25:09Liner Notes?
25:10I won two Pulitzers.
25:11I'm taking this thing to can.
25:13Okay?
25:14I'm gonna be slapping Chris Rock and stroking my Oscar.
25:19The brat sings.
25:20The brat dies.
25:21The great laws are clear on this.
25:23More exposure for us.
25:26More risk for us.
25:29He sings for himself.
25:44It does a bit of a share, Becuna.
25:46If he comes to your people, kill him.
25:51While the little hearts will flush you,
25:55You're gonna confess you,
25:59You used to find me.
26:23You used to find me.
26:25You used to find me.
26:25You used to find me.
26:27You used to find me.
26:28You used to find me.
29:06Pick up the fucking tambourine!
29:08From the Alps of Adequacy to the Canyon of Coup d'Etat, two nights in a row, my violin competing
29:16with his guitar for the solo break, two centuries waiting to share my music, two years as Mr.
29:24Dulac's B-Movie Brute.
29:26But just as I was about to bridge the bridge with murder and mayhem, something quite surprising
29:33happened.
29:34My music wrapped itself around me like a jungle snake constricting its prey, and a lifetime
29:42of blood-bartering overwhelmed the temporal lobe.
29:47Muses appeared in my mind and in the now around me.
29:53Memories taking their turn.
29:59Blood in, blood out.
30:02Blood in, blood out.
30:05Hammering away at the performative vampire persona I had welded into armor.
30:13The armor cracked.
30:18The bridge buckled, and the bonafide vampire emerged, center stage.
30:26It was I who had been adequate.
30:30It was I who had been holding us back.
30:34And now, exposed in the roar, under the white hot lights, my bandmates began to feed.
30:46And that sound I had been grinding them for was finally unleashed.
30:52A euphoric grattiness spilling into the crowd, into their bodies, enveloping the venue.
30:58A euphoric grattiness spilling into the Leutequge.
31:09a caretower.
31:09Complicative struggle.
31:09ECHO OUTThank you, they got you.
31:11I was a son of an antigen.
31:15I was a father.
31:15A euphoric grattiness spilling into the crowd.
31:15A euphoric grattiness spilling into the crowd.
31:15A euphoric grattiness spilling into the crowd.
31:19And now, the most people who are waiting for you ever since the crowd,
31:26And now, the most people are going to be the crowd.
31:38Which one of you is O'Dib before?
31:42What do you do?
31:44What did she take?
31:45Not her.
31:47Me.
31:48Get her on the ground.
31:50I'm glad I have.
31:53Exist me.
31:55I have.
31:56What the hell?
31:57Get up there.
31:59O'Dib.
32:01What are you doing?
32:04I should have quit right there and then.
32:07Would have been a lovely footnote to my life, the band.
32:10But the muses were just beginning.
32:14You done this to me?
32:19I lost myself on stage for a moment.
32:23Seems you still lost.
32:26This song is going to kill you.
32:27You know that, don't you?
32:29I can't die.
32:30Everything dies.
32:32You die.
32:33I die.
32:34She dies.
32:36She dies.
32:37Oh, he dies bad.
32:41I'm immortal.
32:43Yeah, you kill some wolves and fall in love, get the gift, fall in love, go to ground, get dug
32:49up and fall in love.
32:51You like some wet clothes and a coin-op dryer, just 265 years round and round.
32:57Why are you so sad?
33:00Why are you so sad?
33:00Thousands of fans loving you.
33:03I want millions.
33:04And that'll top off that heart of yours.
33:09Billions.
33:10Then why you always got to make it so hard for someone to give it to you?
33:15Huh?
33:17Who told you that?
33:19Don't worry.
33:20They coming.
33:22Who's coming?
33:23Oh, they're going to tell you themselves.
33:27Who's coming?
33:29Great show, don't you?
33:34You are listening to The Failures, Album 5, Side B.
33:39If you take nothing else away from your exorbitant purchase, heed this advice.
33:45Never play two nights in Detroit.
33:49You'll wind up in Windsor with a broken orbital bone listening to transactional sex with the adjoining walls.
33:56How I came to this squalid real estate is the premise of Side B, Album 5, so...
34:04Come.
34:06Now, the boutique hotel we were staying at was having a grandish opening that night,
34:10and the band was asked to lend its celebrity status to the event.
34:13Don't tell me to pose.
34:15Fuck you!
34:16There was a red carpet, a pap line, and a vampire DJ of some renown,
34:21seducing corporate employees, provincial influencers, and party crashing beautifully unwell.
34:26Faster, faster, thank you, thank you.
34:27I was having sex in an elevator with Dee and the girl I had just overindulged myself with early in
34:33the night.
34:34Actually, that happens later.
34:38A lot of things happened that night.
34:40Come on, Dee, come on, come on, come on!
34:45The band is inside with Dan and the VIP perch.
34:49I'm giving the paps my pussycat with no idea that I would be in a fang fight less than an
34:54hour later.
34:56No, no, no, no.
34:57I'm getting ahead of myself again.
34:59I arrive fashionably late, of course.
35:02State your name for the camera.
35:04Baby Jinx.
35:05Okay, baby.
35:06Tell me, why do you like the vampire Lestat?
35:09Like I'm gonna be in the movie?
35:10Oh, you're in it now.
35:13I am feeling good.
35:16Surfing the sublime candy-flipped wave of the girl's blood.
35:19Hear him.
35:20Hear that voice.
35:22The girl is feeling good.
35:23Wow.
35:24Riding the wonders of Dr. Fareed's blood transfusion quick pick-me-up cocktail.
35:29Who's this guy?
35:30Because, like, rock and roll, it's dying.
35:32I sat there, soaking up her praise, along with the band,
35:36still somehow blind to the vampiric mysteries of their front man.
35:40So what if the dead and buried past was now a fresh and eager groupie?
35:45It's rock and roll, you know?
35:47Have a nervous breakdown on stage,
35:49chat it up with the floating girl on the ceiling you almost killed,
35:51have sex with her in the elevator.
35:53Ah, I'm still not there yet.
35:56MDMA and LSD.
35:58The Torval and Dean of hallucinogenics.
36:01And so then everybody's like, is rock and roll actually dying?
36:04Were you a stutterer as a child?
36:06They walk into the ER, they are, like, the doctor.
36:10Unless that's the scalpel.
36:12I'm the scalpel, print the t-shirts.
36:14And so he, the scalpel, cuts into rock and roll's heart.
36:20Like, he cut into mine tonight.
36:23And he has the heart in his mouth.
36:26He's like, do you want to fuck?
36:29And rock and roll is like, yes, bitch!
36:32I excuse myself to the men's room.
36:35Didn't read about vampire physiology in Mr. Dulac's memoir, did you?
36:39No mention of the scars on my chest either.
36:42Hair stopping way above my shoulders.
36:45And just for the record,
36:46no ticket pocket of mine ever had his initials inscribed onto them.
36:50I mean, these are the editorial wags of an insane person.
36:55Note to self-edit that out in the final version.
36:58Starting again.
37:00Vampire's pee.
37:01We don't do it as often as you do, assuming you're not one of us.
37:04And we generally avoid eco-friendly urinals.
37:10Anyway, we don't do it as often as you do.
37:19Detroit.
37:36Name's Tim.
37:37It's Russ.
37:39There, Russ.
38:03Long face sucks.
38:07I apologize.
38:08What? Black licorice?
38:11Why do I have to feel?
38:15I like those ones.
38:17Frankly, Mr. Shankly almost ruined the Queen's dead.
38:20I apologize. Accept it.
38:23We have a coven out here in Detroit.
38:26Do you?
38:27The Fang Gang.
38:29You want to see a real vampire bar? Come with us.
38:32We have a huge house out past Brightmoor.
38:34Our own farm under the floorboards.
38:36I'm not sure.
38:38What about tomorrow night?
38:40You're on the road tomorrow night.
38:42Yes.
38:43It was me being polite.
38:46No, that was you lying.
38:49Eco-friendly urinals.
38:51Good for the planet, so we're told.
38:53Good for vampires.
38:56We chardonnay them.
39:02And then there's regional vampires.
39:06Always trying to make a name for themselves.
39:09I chardonnay them too.
39:12Obligations, I'm afraid.
39:13But please do send my most sincere bonjour to your Brightmoorish color.
39:22Lilac.
39:37I have a blind spot when it comes to blood poisoning.
39:40I didn't think a vampire of my stature would know better.
39:43But then there's that old saying.
39:45You fool me once, shame on me.
39:47You fool me twice.
39:48MDMA and LSD are excellent drugs.
39:52Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce.
39:54Twirl, twirl.
39:56Overshare.
39:56I saw your soul.
39:58I saw yours too.
40:04Still feeling good.
40:07I went looking for my band.
40:08Looking for sex.
40:10Looking for anything that radiated the fun that I sang about in my song, Long Face.
40:16And then...
40:18Regionals.
40:20Wait, did you say that Long Face sucked?
40:23Long Face sucks.
40:24Does it suck?
40:26I wondered.
40:27Did you have a point?
40:28And then I thought...
40:30Ooh, they want a little scrap with a scalpel.
40:34No worries, I thought I have the Queen's blood in me.
40:36I could take 20 Regionals at once with the Queen's blood.
40:41Where's the band then?
40:44They called corporate bullshit.
40:48Went to party upstairs.
40:51So I'm scoring dick pills in Mogadishu for a UN peacekeeper.
40:56When in walks Stuart Copeland wearing a kufi and a mouthful of ammo.
41:01So I thought about having sex with Christine.
41:03And then I thought, that's all the way upstairs.
41:06And then I thought, I'm the scalpel.
41:09What does the scalpel do between here and upstairs?
41:14Mr. Deluxe Memoir tiptoed around vampire sex, didn't it?
41:20He and Dan made it out to be this tortured act or obligational foreplay before blood drinking.
41:26That is not the case at all.
41:28It's not the capstone of empiric desires.
41:31That would be the taking of life.
41:32And next would be a good draining, leaving your victim near death unparalyzed for an unhurried escape.
41:38And after that, there's the petticoot, the little drink, the sip.
41:42And after those three, it's sex.
41:45So now you know.
41:46The fourth best thing a vampire can do to avoid thinking about the past is to have sex.
41:52Sex.
41:54And I have had a lot of sex over the years.
41:56It's not all pain and toxicity.
41:58I have an immortal life and I carry with it an immortal erection and I am not ashamed of it.
42:04Sex is fun.
42:05Like the fun I sing about in Longface.
42:07Which, looking back on it now, does suck.
42:12I still have residuals coming in actually.
42:15Carnal pleasure is essential to a vampire survival.
42:19If only to keep time's baggage from burying you.
42:24Sex with the bellman and Dee and honey trapping baby Jenks.
42:29Probably should have gotten off the seventh floor when I had gotten off.
42:35But I didn't.
42:39I'm getting married in a week.
42:42I'll never forget you.
42:50Law 4.
42:52No vampire shall ever reveal his or her true nature to a mortal.
42:57And let the mortal live.
42:58You do know it's 2025.
43:03Trace the wall, my dear. You'll not want to see this.
43:09The Tooth Team.
43:11The Fang Gang.
43:16I killed a pack of wolves when I was immortal.
43:19I'll most likely tell you about that later as I let it define me for a time.
43:23A normally confining architecture and a thrift store coven galvanized by medieval dogma wouldn't faze me in the least.
43:30I'm building a career that supports my well-being.
43:33But...
43:34The drug blood in my sex legs and the distracting past my music had unleashed on me put me at
43:40a momentary disadvantage.
43:42I'm in charge of my work-life balance.
43:45Law 4.
43:46As if the Dulac Malloy memoir hadn't outed us all two years ago.
43:49The Dulac.
43:50As if my entire stage show wasn't a bawdy burlesque of is he or isn't he.
43:55As if half the vampire population outside the ruined porn of Detroit wasn't waving the dog gift like red cups
44:02in a piss bar.
44:04Collecting fledglings like they were the boo-boo dogs.
44:06I mean I haven't even told my band I was an actual vampire.
44:10I was just singing my songs and fucking my food and defending myself from the vibrant life choices I had
44:15made on my way from the Auvergne countryside to the 8th floor of this why bother hotel.
44:20And this is how it was all going to end for me.
44:23We are the Fangang.
44:25We are the children of the darkness reborn.
44:30Jesus fucking God.
44:33Our mom told the truth. Have you met him?
44:37What the fuck does that even mean?
44:39I heard there was an after party on the asshole floor.
44:43I like to think I was owed the reinforcements.
44:46Dan and the oddly familiar DJ.
44:49But that's me looking back on it now.
44:51Anything I had done to deserve their timely rescue hadn't happened yet.
44:56I'd be dead I think without Dan.
44:58But then maybe more of the world would still be alive had Dan not rallied his army downstairs.
45:05Consider this sliding door of Dan.
45:08Use your decanting blood and devour my words.
45:24It's hard hiding here a god.
45:27You're for real?
45:29CCTV.
45:30Ecoflex toilets.
45:31IMF freezing your accounts because you have the blood of a patricidal queen inside you.
45:36Hello again.
45:38We have to love you.
45:40Telemasker dragged me into that.
45:42And once you reveal yourself you have to be on all the time.
45:46And remember every face you've ever met.
45:48And everywhere you go everyone remembers the thing they said to you in the room that you shared.
45:54Were you a stutterer as a child?
45:59This is why gods prefer hiding in the clouds.
46:03There's nothing there.
46:06But water waiting to fall.
46:15So many opportunities to call it a night that night.
46:20After the song unleashed the muses.
46:23After I saw my first soul.
46:26After I was nearly decapitated in a boutique hotel hallway.
46:32After my vampire nature was revealed to the band and my vampire gift winged me away north of the rivers
46:39off of the country.
46:43But I was saved from such rational thought.
46:47Love will do that to you.
47:10Love will do that to you.
47:19I have a little�를y away.
47:20and it's something I can't get out of music's opened up to that job and I'm not sure if I
47:28can
47:29close it again I'm not really at my best but
47:42it's very nice to see you again
47:49I like what you've done with your hair Mike
47:54Mike
48:01my
48:03Gabriel
48:07it's not much of a reveal I guess
48:10I know it's common gossip now the first thing one thinks about
48:14when my name comes up I assume a privileged individual such as yourself
48:20enjoys a little dirt in their sandwich so I serve it to you know how it felt
48:28then
48:31fledgling
48:34lover
48:37mother
48:40listen to tracks from the vampire list at
48:43wherever you stream music
48:46if you're still listening after the last hour
48:49welcome back
48:50so bring on the music
48:52give me a million more screams
48:54do you kill people
48:57give me a million more screams
49:01let's talk about your mother
49:04I've been a bad boy
49:05done in my heart
49:06my maker
49:07called for his mama
49:09and I can
49:09give me a million more screams
49:15you are caught in great danger with the stuff
49:18you stole my personal position
49:20you hired my biographer
49:24the songs are not about you
49:26I want to stay in bed
49:28eating black and it's the rain
49:30shall we do it?
49:31shall we scorch the mortal world?
49:34I want to stay in bed
49:35eating black and it's the rain
49:37what do you think about the great conversion?
49:40fucking stupid
49:47You are listening to The Failures, album 8, Side A.
49:57At the top of our first episode, we show a scene that is probably happening in real time
50:05after a bunch of catastrophic events have happened.
50:13If you are hearing this now, you must be a very privileged individual.
50:24What makes this season special is that it's still the same characters that you love and
50:28know from the previous seasons, we're just putting them in an entirely new world.
50:32And as they do in the books and as we do in this show, the world continues to crack open
50:37larger and larger.
50:42Just like the plot changes, the whole attitude of the show changes and we move into this
50:48completely crazy rock and roll world.
50:54He did it again. A lot of the beauty and elegance that you would usually see him surrounded by
51:00and the light is gone. It feels really grungy and really rough and really raw. And so it was a
51:05very fun environment to be putting him in.
51:36Come to me.
51:53Come to me.
52:03Come to me.
52:07Come to me.
52:07Come to me.
52:17Come to me.
53:05Even comentaly here.
53:07There was an after party on the asshole floor.
53:10This isn't just sex, drugs, and rock and roll.
53:13It's sex, drugs, rock and roll, and sucking blood out of people's necks.
53:19You're for real?
53:20I'm sorry.
53:37Black Lackoosh is a great song.
53:39It's about the first kill that Lestart made after he reconciled with Louis in New Orleans.
53:52particularly in episode one you do see that he's pushing and pushing to get this sort of moment of
53:57grace to be completely engulfed in the music but just as i was about to bridge the bridge
54:05with murder and mayhem something quite surprising happened and that's what he gets from black
54:12licorice he does have his first breakdown of many muses appeared in my mind and in the now around me
54:20he realizes that he was the one that was holding them back so then all of a sudden it cracks
54:25open
54:25and the real thing starts to appear and that sound i had been grinding them for was finally
54:33unleashed he started it to be i'm gonna go and tell my story i'm gonna do a rewrite this is
54:39my
54:39version of events and it's evolved into something different he's tapped into his past
54:55which one of you so did before
55:04you
55:09you
55:10you
55:11you
55:11you
55:11you
55:16you
55:23you
55:24you
55:33you
55:34you
55:34you
55:35you
55:35you
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