- 2 days ago
First broadcast 18th March 2000.
Private eyes Randall and Hopkirk are investigating two-timing husband Kenneth Crisby as Marty Hopkirk prepares for his marriage to Jeannie Hurst.
Bob Mortimer - Jeff Randall
Vic Reeves - Marty Hopkirk
Emilia Fox - Jeannie Hurst
Charles Dance - Kenneth Crisby
David Tennant - Gordon Stylus
Hannah Miles - Annette Stylus
Jessica Hynes - Felia Siderova (as Jessica Stevenson)
Melissa Knatchbull - Wendy Gill
Steve Pemberton - Sergeant Liddel
Mark Gatiss - Inspector Large
Paul Shearer - Man in Restaurant
Gemma Page - Woman in Restaurant
Martin Wimbush - Head Waiter
Michael O'Bernicia - Workman (as Michael Knighton)
Brian Williams - Arty Type at Party
Joscelyn Best - Young Artist
Selina Giles - Spirit Girl
Laurie Goode - Removal Man
Charlie Higson - Artist
Kerry Norton - Spirit Girl
Private eyes Randall and Hopkirk are investigating two-timing husband Kenneth Crisby as Marty Hopkirk prepares for his marriage to Jeannie Hurst.
Bob Mortimer - Jeff Randall
Vic Reeves - Marty Hopkirk
Emilia Fox - Jeannie Hurst
Charles Dance - Kenneth Crisby
David Tennant - Gordon Stylus
Hannah Miles - Annette Stylus
Jessica Hynes - Felia Siderova (as Jessica Stevenson)
Melissa Knatchbull - Wendy Gill
Steve Pemberton - Sergeant Liddel
Mark Gatiss - Inspector Large
Paul Shearer - Man in Restaurant
Gemma Page - Woman in Restaurant
Martin Wimbush - Head Waiter
Michael O'Bernicia - Workman (as Michael Knighton)
Brian Williams - Arty Type at Party
Joscelyn Best - Young Artist
Selina Giles - Spirit Girl
Laurie Goode - Removal Man
Charlie Higson - Artist
Kerry Norton - Spirit Girl
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00I
00:32She's showing him her etchings.
00:35Come on, Marty, hurry up.
00:36I'm trying to get it focused.
00:38Well, make sure you do this time.
00:40Ah, there. Lovely.
00:43Kenneth Crisby.
00:44Mrs Crisby's not going to like this one bitch.
00:46She's going to take you to the cleaners.
00:51He's getting very excited in there.
00:53He can see everything.
00:54But the question is, Geoff, will it stand up in court?
00:57Come on, Marty, take it more seriously, please.
01:00Oh, come on, Geoff.
01:01All we ever do is divorce cases.
01:03When are we going to get something exciting that involves murder, mystery and helicopters?
01:11Helicopters?
01:11Well, you know what I mean.
01:14Kenneth, enjoy your house while you can because you want to be here much longer.
01:17Wait a minute.
01:19He's gone.
01:21What the hell do you think you're doing?
01:23Mind the camera.
01:24Mind the camera.
01:25I'll shove the camera.
01:26Don't mess with me.
01:27I'm a train.
01:28I'm sorry, Mr Crisby.
01:29It's a very expensive...
01:31Geoff!
01:32You miserable little parasite.
01:34I'll murder you.
01:36Geoff!
01:41You're a dead man.
01:45Genie!
01:46Genie!
01:48Stop the car, please!
01:49Where have you been?
01:50He said he'd only be a few minutes.
01:51Get in the driver's seat and start the car.
01:54Great night out this is.
01:55Genie, please, just stop the car!
01:57Stop the car!
02:11Excuse me.
02:14Excuse me.
02:15What?
02:15Do you mind not hitting my fiancée?
02:18Fiancée?
02:19You can't possibly walk down the aisle with this little turd, let alone bear his children.
02:25I won't tell you again.
02:27Go home.
02:28It's way past your bedtime.
02:34You!
02:35Get in the car and don't ever try to work on a date again.
02:41You all right, Genie?
02:42You all right, Genie?
03:00Right, listen to me.
03:01The bank is here, this alley here is one way.
03:05This road here is closed due to road works, okay?
03:08Now, the first car should arrive at the junction of Spooner Drive and Berman Street at exactly 10.15.
03:14The church is approximately three miles away, so the motorcade should...
03:17God, you're thorough, Geoff.
03:19You must be the most thorough-best man in the world.
03:22We're wondering, perhaps you might do some diagrams for us for what to do when we get into the hotel
03:27room?
03:28Oh, can you not take this seriously, please, Marty?
03:30No, it's all right, Geoff. We are taking it seriously. Go on.
03:33Thank you, Genie.
03:34Geoff, could I just clarify one thing?
03:36When we get to the hotel room, should I go straight for the trousers or kiss him first?
03:41Forget it. If you can't take it seriously...
03:43I think she should go for the trousers first.
03:45Good, that's it.
03:46Right, look, it's you two who are getting married, right?
03:48Good, glad to see you.
03:49Thank you, Ophelia.
03:50Thank God for that.
03:51We'll carry on with this later.
03:53I really don't think you two realise exactly what's involved.
03:56I've got to go, actually, Geoff, but thanks for everything.
03:58But, Genie, there's the photographer at the top...
04:00Marty really appreciates everything you're doing for me now.
04:03I'm not doing it for him. I'm doing it for you, Genie.
04:08See ya.
04:15Mr. Stylous.
04:16Oh, thank you, Ophelia.
04:18Hello, Randall. Geoff Rangel. Pleased to meet you. We spoke on the phone.
04:21Right, and this is my partner, Marty Hopker.
04:23Hello.
04:24Although I expect I'll be dealing with your case myself, Gordon.
04:28Gordon Stylous!
04:29Gordon Stylous, the famous artist?
04:31Yes.
04:32I've got a postcard of one of your paintings in my toilet.
04:35That's nice.
04:35Yes, I know a lot about art and classical music.
04:38I recently bought Classical Moods, and that's a four-album box set.
04:41Shut up, Marty.
04:44Have a seat, Gordon.
04:56So I should imagine this case involves international art theft or a clever forgery
05:00or a mysterious painting of a beautiful woman that contains a clue...
05:04I want you to follow my wife.
05:07Take over, would you, Geoff? Please divorce as your speciality.
05:10It's not divorce.
05:12It's something much worse.
05:15What do you think of Damien for a name?
05:18I've heard worse.
05:20Like what?
05:21Actually, no, I haven't.
05:24Please, don't smoke.
05:27Sorry?
05:27I don't want a mutant baby.
05:30Oh, who does?
05:32She's my inspiration.
05:34My soul music.
05:36My all, my A1, my habit, my main line.
05:41She's more than a...
05:42Is that a painting?
05:44Yeah, it was just a bare wall out there before.
05:46We thought it would treat the place up a bit, you know?
05:48Yeah, I did it myself.
05:49It's my design and everything.
05:50It's not very good.
05:53She's changed.
05:54She's shifted shape.
05:56She's become distant.
05:58She has these violent episodes.
06:01And I thought at first that she might try and harm someone else,
06:04but lately I've become terrified that she's going to turn it inwards.
06:11What made her change, do you think?
06:13I don't know.
06:14I don't know.
06:15I don't know.
06:15I don't know.
06:16No, that's what I want you to find out.
06:18I want you to watch her, find out what it is, and stop her from...
06:25Can I just clarify?
06:26Are we talking about suicide here?
06:32Gordon's having this big party.
06:33It's a birthday, and he wants us there to mingle.
06:35Wait a minute.
06:36When is this?
06:37This weekend.
06:38Marty, we're getting married this weekend.
06:41Are we?
06:43Jeannie?
06:43Jeannie?
06:43We need the money.
06:45The wedding's not until Sunday afternoon,
06:46and it's been organised right down to the tiniest, tiniest little detail.
06:49You could come along.
06:50Marty, don't be ridiculous.
06:51I can't.
06:52Miss Hurst.
06:55I do not pay you to hobnob with the guests.
06:58I'm sorry, Mr Drake, but this is my fiancée, Marty.
07:02Marty, Mr Drake, Mr Drake, Marty.
07:04We both work all hours, so I never get the chance to talk to him, and he just...
07:08Whatever gave her the impression, Miss Hurst,
07:10that I was remotely interested in your private life,
07:13this is a restaurant, not the opera Winfrey show.
07:19I can't believe you've talked me into going to this party.
07:22You know me, Jeannie.
07:24I have a silver tongue.
07:26My body may die, but my heart will keep loving you, baby.
07:32Ooh, our love will survive through the passage of time.
07:37Believe me.
07:39Believe my body may die, but my heart will keep loving you, baby.
07:47Ooh, our love will survive through the passage of time.
07:53Believe me.
07:54Will you two shut up, please?
07:56And Marty!
07:58Marty, will you drive a bit faster, please?
08:00You must be the slowest driver in the world.
08:02It's not good to thrash the engine, Jeff.
08:03Yeah, but Marty, if we were going any slower, we would be parking.
08:07Jeff, you don't know the first thing about driving or cars.
08:10Yeah, or singing either, Jeff.
08:14My love will survive through the passage of time.
08:18I can't believe it.
08:19Shut up!
08:20Please!
08:22May my body live, I know my heart will keep loving you, baby.
08:29OK, when we get inside, I'll stay close to Annette Stylus,
08:32make sure she doesn't try to kill herself.
08:34You mingle with the other guests.
08:36Hey, what gives you the right to say who does what?
08:38Because I'm the better detective.
08:41God, it's like being stuck with a couple of kids.
08:43He started it.
08:45Follow me.
08:52Marty!
09:17He's got a couple of kids.
09:25Oh, oh, here she is, folks. Party girl, huh?
09:31Never been ready to stop without you.
09:33Just went for a drive. Needed some fresh air.
09:35Oh, Annette, this is Marty, this is Geoff, and Gina.
09:41You know, for some stupid reason, I thought this was my party.
09:43But you only seem to have invited your friends.
09:46You don't have any friends, Annette.
09:50What are we doing here?
09:52Trying to save Gordon's marriage by the look of it.
09:55I get a pretty distorted picture of marital bliss snocking about with you two.
10:00Is this what it comes to, then?
10:02Mutual distrust, cheating in spite.
10:05Are you sure we're doing the right thing, Marty?
10:08All I know is I have a picture of an old white-haired couple in a little cottage somewhere,
10:14sitting happily in the late afternoon sun,
10:16spent their lives together, grown old together.
10:20You can face anything together.
10:22Oh, yes. Who might these old fools be?
10:25I've no idea.
10:27But I do know that you and I are out the back,
10:29rutting senselessly the rhubarb patch.
10:31You're so a bit old romantic.
10:33Let me put it another way, Jeannie.
10:34Je t'aime.
10:37Ich liebe Dick.
10:38Ti amo.
10:39Or as the Japanese would say,
10:40Aichi, ti masu.
10:44How do you like that?
10:45Never even said he loved me.
10:49This old stomach, you worthless junk.
10:53It's the past.
10:54I've moved on.
10:56Painting is dead!
10:58The stuff I'm working on now is going to put all the art world away.
11:02Boom!
11:04Come on.
11:04Come with me.
11:05I'm going to show you what art is.
11:18I've got a major exhibition opening soon.
11:20This is mostly work in progress.
11:23Ah, this is very special.
11:25Beautiful, beautifully understated and yet almost overstated.
11:30And the material?
11:32Gold, if I'm not mistaken.
11:34No, it's frozen urine.
11:36My own.
11:38Of course, of course.
11:41For some reason, I just love making casts of my own head.
11:49Do you know, Gordon, you're right.
11:50Your sculptures are a lot more impressive than your paintings.
11:54This, for instance.
11:55What do you call this?
11:57That's my washing up.
11:58Exquisite!
12:24Jeannie!
12:26I'm going home, Jeff.
12:27This is stupid.
12:28Yeah, I know what you mean.
12:29I could strangle Marty sometimes.
12:31Me too.
12:33Just make sure that he gets there on time tomorrow.
12:35And I know you wouldn't, but don't leave him to his own devices.
12:39Let's face it, he's basically just a big kid.
12:41Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
12:45ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
12:46ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
12:49It's quite fun, Gordon.
12:51But is it art?
12:53We have to break down the barriers between science and art.
12:57Why can't you be a great artist and a great inventor?
13:00I mean, look at Leonardo da Vinci.
13:03That's resin.
13:04It's very, um, what's the word?
13:07Mimetic.
13:09hard
13:09I love her, I love her, you know
13:12L-O-V-E, I'm nothing
13:15without her, I'm no
13:16I'm no thing
13:18I'm zero
13:20I can't stand for anything to happen to her
13:23but you've seen what she's like
13:25I saw her the other night
13:26she's gone off for a drive
13:28she was standing on the cliffs
13:30I think she'd have jumped if I hadn't stopped her
13:33she's slipping away from me
13:36what, you'd solve this if I don't have her
13:40Michael
13:42Michael
13:45I'm going to paint her something
13:47for her birthday
13:51something
13:53magnificent
13:57it's over between me and Stylus
14:00it has been for a year
14:04I can't live in a shadow any longer
14:06I can't breathe
14:09you're my only way out
14:13this is not sudden
14:16oh
14:19f
14:20f
14:20f
14:23f
14:24f
14:24And the rain don't leave
14:32Oh, confusion
14:36It leads to free, supreme, it's all over me
14:41Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, androids, automata and drones
14:47I give you the greatest gift that man can give
14:52The thing that separates men from machines
14:58The gift of art
15:04I'm going to be pretty preoccupied for a while, Marty
15:08Watch her, but don't let her know
15:10Don't worry, Gordy
15:12Discretion is my maiden name
15:22Isn't it fantastic we're actually witnessing the creation of a masterpiece
15:26Fantastic
15:27I haven't been this excited since Reader's Digest personally selected me to go into their prize draw
15:32I'm going home, Marty
15:44Jeannie!
15:46Jeannie, wait, we can't go
15:47Marty, we're getting married tomorrow
15:49But I have to stay, at least until it's finished this painting
15:52I promised Gordon
15:53Well, Gordon, your new best mate
15:55What are you going to do?
15:56Live here forever?
15:57Watch over his wife 24 hours a day?
16:00It's stupid, Marty, it doesn't make any sense
16:02Love him
16:06I suppose I did
16:08Of course I did
16:09I probably still do love him
16:11But you can love someone and hate their guts at the same time, can't you?
16:16So will you do it?
16:18Will you help me?
16:24Hi, Jeff Randall
16:29Have you ever seen a more narcissistic display?
16:33No
16:33He's lost it big time
16:35You've heard the rumours, I suppose
16:37No
16:38But she basically did all his best work for him
16:41You kidding?
16:42No
16:42While he's busy punting about with his media terms
16:46Abusing his system in a variety of fashionable night spots
16:49The little lady stays at home slaving over hot canvas
16:53I don't suppose he'd ever like that one to get out, would he?
16:56He'd be well distressed
16:58Is he distressed or unstressed?
17:01De-stressed
17:04Right
17:06Is that your decision?
17:08Well, sod you then
17:10I'll just have to do it without you
17:12Thanks for nothing
17:13Don't forget it, Marty
17:15I'm going home
17:15You can do what you bloody like
17:26Keys?
17:32Too kind
17:35Drive carefully
17:36And don't go above 40
17:38And don't park under any lime trees
17:40And leave that terrible sticky stuff on the roof
17:43And whatever you do, don't
17:44Oh, drop dead
17:47Neenie
17:48All right, you're right
18:02Don't jump, you've so much to live for
18:04Yeah?
18:06Like what?
18:09Never mind
18:10I wasn't planning on jumping
18:11Oh, good, right
18:12Cos, um
18:13I promised Gordon I'd look after you
18:15Why?
18:16What is this?
18:19You're not a friend of his, are you?
18:21Who are you?
18:23I'm, um
18:25I'm a private detective
18:31Give the man a cigar
18:34So, the great stylist has finally resorted to spying on me, has he?
18:38What's he told you?
18:40Well, that, um
18:41You might try to kill yourself
18:43That you might be going mad
18:44Mad?
18:45Oh, I'm mad, all right
18:49Mad at him for treating me like this
18:51I'm mad at you for buying his lice
18:54So, I'm suicidal, am I?
18:57Prone to violent outbursts
18:59Losing my marbles
19:13Don't worry, Mr. Hopkirk
19:15He's the crazy one
19:16Not me
19:30This is supposed to be my party
19:32But I don't suppose he's even noticed I'm not there
19:37He wasn't always like this
19:40I've never known anyone who could be so passionate
19:45He was crazy about me
19:47It was scary, almost as if he wanted to be me
19:50But now he's just crazy
19:54Be careful of him
19:55I don't know what he might do
19:58Don't worry about me
19:58If you see, I can look after myself
19:59I can look after myself
20:01I can look after myself
20:02I can look after myself
20:18Martin?
20:26Martin?
20:27Martin?
20:28Martin?
20:32Martin?
20:32Martin?
21:01Oh
21:02Martin?
21:03Martin?
21:07Martin?
21:07It's all right, I'm okay
21:08It's not my lucky day though, is it?
21:35Hey, Ned, what are you doing?
21:45Stop!
21:47Stop!
21:53Help me!
22:04Okay. Okay. It's all right. Just don't get out of the car. Don't. Don't get out of the...
22:25Oh, my God.
23:09This is it for Annette. I shall call this piece ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
23:37I don't really think you know just what you're getting into.
23:45Maybe you think this is just another fight to the day.
23:52Come out with your hearts made, cause I've surrounded this place. Oh, no, there's no escape. I've got you covered.
24:07Yeah.
24:08My body may die, but my heart will keep loving you, baby. My body may die, but my heart will
24:19keep loving you, baby.
24:24My body may die, but my heart will keep loving you, baby.
24:31Gene. I can't find him anywhere. His bed's not being slept in.
24:36Do you think he's had second thoughts? No, this isn't like him at all.
24:56This is Opcurt. Not yet, Sergeant. All right, yeah. Sorry. Um, Miss Hurst.
25:03Yes. I'm afraid we have some bad news.
25:24It was always Jeff and Marty. They did everything together.
25:28Call Jeff. What about Jeannie? What about Jeannie and Marty?
25:34I don't want any pity, Wendy.
25:37Well, maybe Jeff doesn't want any either.
25:52Look at me. I wasn't prepared for a funeral. This is my waitress's uniform.
25:59I'm sorry, Jeannie. When I saw the car had gone, I thought you two must have left together.
26:05I should have taken Stardust more seriously when he warned me how unstable Annette was.
26:11Yeah, Jeff, you can't blame yourself.
26:14It's just... I keep expecting to see him walk down that path with a big, stupid grin on his face
26:21saying it's just a big joke.
26:27Some joke, eh?
26:37I never thought I'd say this, Marty, but I'm gonna... I'm gonna miss you.
26:44So long then, partner.
26:47And enjoy yourself wherever it is you're going.
27:16I'm sorry, but you must stop this, please. The paint fumes.
27:20I don't want to have a mutant baby. Yes?
27:26I don't want to have a mutant baby. Yes?
27:49Marty.
27:52Why not?
28:01Cheers, Marty.
28:08Who is it?
28:11Oh, hello, Inspector.
28:12Sorry to bother you, Mr Randall. I understand you must be very upset.
28:16Well, yeah, it's funny. You know, you plod on day by day, not really thinking, and then something happens that
28:22just blows your whole world apart.
28:24Right, yeah. Thought you ought to know we've closed the case. Basically, she was just bonkers. Sorry, that was inappropriate.
28:34Insane. She was insane.
28:36We traced her last call. It was to Stylus' art dealer.
28:40She was ranting on, apparently, threatening all kinds of mayhem.
28:43He thought she was just drunk again, didn't think she'd actually do anything, let alone...
28:47Kasplat!
28:50Sorry, that was in bad taste.
28:52Anyway, we've taken a false statement from Mr Crisby. He's been very helpful.
28:56The jigsaw is complete.
28:57I'm sorry, from who?
28:59Kenneth Crisby. Stylus' agent. Owner of the Crisby Gallery. Up in town.
29:07Kenneth Crisby?
29:17Well, be careful, mate. Do you want to answer that?
29:20Yes, mate.
29:23Hi.
29:23All right.
29:26This is over, yeah?
29:37Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
29:40The very piece Gordon was working on as Annette died.
29:44I expect this to be the most sought-after piece in the exhibition.
29:48I've already had offers well into six figures.
29:50People seem to love the delightful fuisson of violence and insanity.
30:05Cheer up, hombre.
30:08Future's looking very rosy.
30:11She's gone?
30:13Yes, very sad and all that. Now, I thought it prudent to draw up a new contract.
30:19Anything. I don't care anymore.
30:20Of course.
30:22I thought 50-50.
30:2550-50?
30:27Yes.
30:28Darling Jennifer's walking out on me with 50% of everything I own.
30:33I thought it only fair to take 50% of what you own.
30:36You bastard.
30:39Yes, I know.
30:40Nevertheless, I think you'll sign.
30:42After all, what choice do you have?
30:44I've only to tell Inspector Large what Annette and I really talked about on the telephone that afternoon and...
30:50What did you really talk about?
30:53Oh, look.
30:54It's one half of the dynamic duo that destroyed my marriage.
30:58I think you played a part in that, you know, Mr. Crisby.
31:00Don't spare me the moralising, you little twerp.
31:03How did you get in here? What are you doing here, anyway?
31:05I'm here on business. I did some work for Gordon and he hasn't paid me yet.
31:09Hasn't paid you?
31:11Of course he hasn't paid you, you tit.
31:13You were hired to stop his wife from killing herself and look what happened.
31:19Go away.
31:20And don't come back.
31:22Right.
31:24Right.
31:35I'm not sure.
31:37Oh, for God's sake.
31:40You always have chicken.
31:42Wherever we go.
31:44Waitress!
31:46Waitress!
31:47Don't know why I bother sometimes.
31:49Just take you to Kentucky Fried Chicken and have done with it.
31:53Oh!
31:54You've deigned to join us, have you?
31:56Sorry, um...
31:57Can I get you some drinks?
31:59That's all right. Keep me your money in your purse, love. I'll get the drinks.
32:03Right, er, I'll have the foie gras and the turbot. She'll have the ghost cheese and the chicken.
32:08No, I think I'll try the guinea fowl.
32:10Oh, for God's sake. You feel sorry for guinea fowl. It makes you cry. She'll have the chicken.
32:19No, um...
32:21I don't know, um...
32:23What would you recommend?
32:26I recommend you leave this arsehole and go out with a human being.
32:31I beg your pardon?
32:33Do you know who I am?
32:36Ladies and gentlemen, I wonder if anyone can help me.
32:38This poor gentleman seems to have completely forgotten who he is.
32:42Does anyone know?
32:43Oh, you might have seen him, um, at the circus or on Crimewatch.
32:47Come on, anyone?
32:48It's a very sad case of amnesia.
32:50Don't be smashed.
33:04You are dead, you.
33:09Right, that's the last thing, I think.
33:24They got me, Geoff! They killed me!
33:26I know.
33:27I have to.
33:33I haven't been playing this too long.
33:35My heart in a dozen
33:37My heart will be loving me, baby
33:41Oh!
33:50Geoff! Geoff! Go to the church. Meet me at my grave.
33:54Not now, Marty. I'm tired. It's lead.
33:56Marty?
33:58Geoff! It's all right, don't panic. You're not going mad.
34:01Please, Marty, you're dead.
34:02I know, I know, but I've come back. Look, I know this is a bit of a shock to you,
34:05but
34:05Go to the cemetery and meet me there.
34:08Take my car.
34:09And don't drive too fast.
34:11And don't over-rev it.
34:11No, stop it, Tony.
34:14And don't...
34:16My heart in a dozen
34:18My heart will be loving me, baby
34:23Oh, our love will survive the passing of time
34:28Believe me, believe me
34:41What am I doing here?
34:47Hello, Geoff.
34:48What?
34:49Marty, you're not dead!
34:51Of course I'm dead, you idiot. You buried me.
34:53I keep trying to tell you I'm a ghost.
34:55Stop it, Marty. It's not funny.
34:57I know it's not funny. I'm a flaming stiff, but will you please listen to me?
35:02Bloody hell.
35:03Satisfied?
35:06Marty, this is typically you. Why can't you stay dead like anyone else?
35:10I've got one night to return to Earth. One night to find out who killed me.
35:14Annette Stylis killed you, Marty. Now, please, just go back to Heaven or wherever it is you've come from.
35:18It's not right, Geoff. It doesn't make sense.
35:21What doesn't make sense, Marty, is you study her talking to me.
35:25Gordon was lying. Annette wasn't crazy. She was going to expose him. She'd been talking to his agent.
35:29Kenneth Crisby.
35:31What?
35:32Crisby is Gordon's agent.
35:34Well, there's a coincidence.
35:36Yeah, you know, I did think something fishy was going on.
35:38And I was going to confront Stylis about it, Marty, but...
35:43Oh, this is ridiculous!
35:45Talking to a dead man. I must be dreaming or something.
35:50Geoff! You've got to believe in me. I've only got one night!
36:00You!
36:02Diane!
36:04Jeannie!
36:05Jeannie!
36:05Jeannie, what are you doing here?
36:08I've been fired from the restaurant, Geoff.
36:10It was stupid. I'd just lost my temper.
36:14I've been driving aimlessly around. I couldn't face going home. I needed someone to talk to.
36:19I come here sometimes and talk to Marty's grave.
36:23You must think I'm crazy talking to a dead person.
36:26No, not at all, Jeannie. Not at all.
36:27It was just... I'm not coping very well.
36:30Oh, Jeannie.
36:35Oh, yeah?
36:36I'm not cold in my grave and you're making moves on my fiancée.
36:39Go away.
36:40What?
36:42I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...
36:43No, not you, Jeannie. Not you, not at all.
36:47Look, Jeannie, do you notice anything unusual here tonight?
36:53No, other than the fact that we're standing in a graveyard in the middle of the night.
36:57She can't see me, Geoff. I chose you. You're the only one.
37:03Look, Jeannie, if Marty was here, if he could hear you, what would you want to say to him?
37:11I miss him terribly and I haven't laughed since he died.
37:16Look after you, Geoff.
37:29I've got to go. Look, Jeannie, I may have lost the plot, but there are things about Marty's death that
37:33just don't add up.
37:34Well, where are you going?
37:35I'm going to go and see Stylis, ask him some questions.
37:38Well, I'll come with you.
37:39No, Jeannie, please. You just go home. You just go home.
37:55All right, I believe in you. You satisfied?
37:57Yeah, good. Right, then let's go. We're running out of time. I've only got until daybreak.
38:02Or what?
38:04Before the sun shall rise anew, each ghost unto his grave must gu.
38:10Gu.
38:10Gu.
38:11Gu.
38:12Gu.
38:13Gu.
38:14Gu.
38:14Gu.
38:14I didn't write the bloody rhyme.
38:17Oh, no, it's we've only got until dawn, so let's go and see Stylis.
38:20All right.
38:21Let's gu.
38:21Gu.
38:22Gu.
38:23Gu.
38:23Gu.
38:36Where have you been?
38:41Gu.
38:42Gu.
38:44Gu.
38:49Gu.
38:50Gu.
39:08Gordon's best work for him, did she?
39:09Yeah. Don't drive so fast.
39:11I'm not driving fast, Marty.
39:13So why did she phone Crisby?
39:14Mind the curb.
39:16Marty, will you concentrate, please?
39:17How can I concentrate when you're driving like a maniac?
39:19Marty, are we in a hurry or what?
39:21Yes.
39:21So why did she phone Crisby?
39:22He was the only other person who knew the truth.
39:25She wanted him to tell the world.
39:27But he refused, yeah?
39:28Yeah, well, Stylus earned him a lot of money.
39:30Crisby and Stylus both had good reason to want her out of the way, Marty.
39:34But you've got to face it.
39:35She topped herself, didn't she?
39:37Did she?
39:39What if she wasn't driving the car?
39:42What if it was somebody dressed as her and she was already dead?
39:45And what if this whole thing is a scam to get rid of her nest?
39:49Yeah, but Crisby wouldn't have had time to get there, would he?
39:51And Stylus was too busy doing this stupid painting at the party.
39:55Was he?
39:58He was wearing a mask and goggles.
40:00It could have been anyone.
40:02Or anything.
40:05Jeff!
40:06Slow down, what do you think you're doing?
40:08I'm solving your murder, Marty.
40:17It wouldn't, it wouldn't, no.
40:19I can't, no, don't sing, Matt.
40:21Don't be singing at me.
40:23No, because, because I didn't, I, I didn't, no.
40:26Come on.
40:30Jeff!
40:32Allow me, please.
40:33Go ahead.
40:36I don't understand it.
40:38Maybe you need to take a run-up, Marty.
40:42Okay.
40:59Hello, Gordon.
41:00You look nice.
41:02Aye.
41:03Shall we talk, Gordon?
41:05Well, I know.
41:07It's all over.
41:09I'm nothing with her hat.
41:12She was everything to me, now she's gone.
41:17So why did you kill her?
41:18I thought it would solve everything.
41:20I haven't solved anything.
41:21You and Crisby planned this from the start, didn't you?
41:23Yeah.
41:23Kill two birds with one stone, you get rid of a net and Crisby gets his revenge on us.
41:28It was Karen's idea.
41:31It wasn't you painting at the party at all, was it?
41:33It was one of them.
41:36Well, that was bloody easy.
41:38Jeff, look out!
41:45Ah, Mr Randall, you've served it.
41:52Crisby.
41:54I'm afraid I have some rather bad news for you.
41:56You're about to become a permanent art exhibit, and a frighteningly realistic one at that.
42:02You see, Mr Stylus and I are on the cusp of becoming very, very rich men.
42:08And we can't let a common little git like you spoil that now, can we?
42:20Marty!
42:21Marty!
42:22Hey, thank God!
42:23You've got to do something.
42:25What?
42:27Jeff, I'm a ghost.
42:29Nobody can see me apart from you.
42:30I can't do anything.
42:33I can blow up things.
42:35And besides, it's nearly dawn.
42:36So?
42:37Remember the rhyme?
42:39Before the sun shall rise anew, each ghost unto his grave must goon.
42:46Or what?
42:48Curse be the ghost who dares to stay and face the awful light of day.
42:52Yeah, but what's it mean, Marty?
42:53What happens?
42:53I don't know.
42:54I can't remember the rest of the rhyme, Jeff.
42:55I'm sorry.
42:56I'm sorry it had to end like this.
42:57I've got to go.
42:58Marty, please, no.
43:00You can't leave me like this, Marty.
43:01Do something!
43:02I'm sorry, Jeff.
43:03I've got to go.
43:10Can you be done?
43:11Just give me a minute, all right?
43:14Resinject!
43:15It does exactly what it says on the label.
43:17Drives to a very tough finish.
43:19It'll kill you, of course, but we all have to suffer for our art.
43:22You'll be hung in a gallery somewhere for streams of bored schoolchildren to gawp at for all eternity.
43:29Never mind.
43:30I'm sure you always wanted to be well hung.
43:34That's right.
43:39You know, this is very satisfying.
43:41The only thing that would make this moment more complete would be to drop in the vicious little bitch who
43:46kicked me in the head.
43:47Hello!
43:49Ah!
43:50Happy birthday, me!
43:52Jeannie, get out!
43:53Get away from here!
43:54Jeff, I'm sorry I followed you, but...
43:57You won't get the better of me this time, dearie.
44:08Time to join your fiancé.
44:13Get out, Jeannie!
44:16Quickly!
44:17Run!
44:33Oh, dearie!
44:34Oh, dearie!
44:35Jeannie!
44:39Oh, dearie!
44:54Marty!
44:55You beauty!
44:57You didn't really think I'd leave you, did you, partner?
44:59You took your time, didn't you?
45:02Yee-haw!
45:03Yee-haw!
45:06Jeff, I'm losing the signal.
45:10Look after Jeannie for me.
45:16What the hell was that?
45:18You know, something must have exploded, Jeannie, but never mind that.
45:21Where's Stylus?
45:26Jeannie, get me out of here quick!
45:29Hurry up!
45:30Come on, quickly, Jeannie!
45:33Come on!
45:37The bitch is back!
45:41Jeannie, hurry up!
45:42I may be finished, but my art lives on.
45:46Man and art!
45:48Indestivishable!
45:49I am immortal!
45:50Please!
45:51I am become art.
46:16Thank you all for coming.
46:19Gordon Stylus was a truly famous artist, and I'm sure this exhibition will be a huge success.
46:27I can't tell you what a joy it is to see you all here today.
46:32And I hope you choke to death on your champagne.
46:34All right, that's enough.
46:35Get him out of here.
46:36So, you're going to watch him football tonight, Mr. President?
46:38It's not very likely, is it, Sergeant?
46:40All right, yeah.
46:44I'm going to get another drink.
46:45Do you want one?
46:45Yeah, thanks, Jeannie.
46:47And thanks for coming to me rescue as well.
46:49It's nothing.
46:53Can't leave you alone for a minute, can I?
46:55Marty, what are you doing here?
46:57It's all over.
46:58I remembered the rest of the rhyme, didn't I?
46:59Cursed be the ghost who dares to stay and face the awful light of day.
47:04Ye shall not to your grave return until your chosen one be gurn.
47:09Gurn.
47:09Gurn.
47:10Gurn.
47:11Gone.
47:12Gone.
47:13Gone.
47:13Anyway, it doesn't matter.
47:15I had to get back again.
47:16The grave rejected me.
47:18Yeah, so I'm stuck with you, then, am I?
47:20No, I'm stuck with you, pal.
47:22Partners for life.
47:23Hey, I'm sorry, Marty.
47:25You know, if you hadn't come back to help...
47:27I couldn't leave my own partner there to die, could I?
47:30Anyway, this way, I can keep an eye on Jeannie.
47:33Yeah.
47:38So, what do you think?
47:40Well, I don't know much about art, but I know what I like.
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