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00:00:07The Tea? Cinnamon. The Girl? Late. 23 minutes late. Two more minutes and I'm leaving.
00:00:20They were always nervous, which was expected. I knew what I looked like.
00:00:29Chiseled? Check.
00:00:35Caramel blonde hair that somehow manages to look wavy and thick all the damn time? Check.
00:00:43Sexy crooked smile? Check.
00:00:49And don't even get me started on penis size. It just gets better the further south you go.
00:00:58Trust me.
00:01:06It's dead.
00:01:10Or set. But I doubt that's the way to get on the good side of that barista you've been trying
00:01:14not to check out since you walked through that door.
00:01:17I-I haven't been.
00:01:19Jealousy is a crucial emotion that men feel before falling in love.
00:01:26I won't bite.
00:01:30Yet.
00:01:32Take it.
00:01:36I hate tea.
00:01:38No, you love tea.
00:01:43Smile.
00:01:45What?
00:01:47Hey. Um, you guys need anything, or?
00:01:50Yeah, I'll send my girlfriend over if we need anything. How's that?
00:01:57Thanks, though.
00:02:04Stop fidgeting and sit up straight.
00:02:06Sorry.
00:02:07It's just that he's only talked to me, like, twice, and only to ask me if I want sugar in
00:02:12my coffee.
00:02:14So...
00:02:14He hates coffee.
00:02:25Touch me.
00:02:29Lower.
00:02:31Stop staring or we're done.
00:02:35I'll laugh.
00:02:41That'll do, too.
00:02:43Hey, Michelle.
00:02:44If you need anything, just let me know.
00:02:47Okay?
00:02:49I'm...
00:02:49I'm good with my tea.
00:02:52You hate tea.
00:02:53No.
00:02:54She loves tea.
00:02:58Asshole.
00:03:01He knows my name.
00:03:04Who are you?
00:03:06Ian Hunter.
00:03:07Master wingman.
00:03:08And your only chance in hell of getting...
00:03:11that.
00:03:12There you go.
00:03:13Appreciate it.
00:03:15When do we start?
00:03:18Three minutes ago.
00:03:47Hey, how was she?
00:03:49Because if she's not a good fit, I have another girl that offered to pay me in sexual favors
00:03:52moving at the top.
00:03:53Now, cross her off the list.
00:03:55If she knows how to give favors, she knows how to get her own damn man.
00:03:58Noted.
00:03:59Oh, and Gabby says if you don't make it tonight for dinner, she's going to glue your hand to
00:04:03your penis, although she was much more graphic.
00:04:05Oh, well, always is.
00:04:07I'm on my way.
00:04:08See you there.
00:04:37I didn't pick this life.
00:04:39Love Coach Boyce.
00:04:40You promised.
00:04:43I did?
00:04:44You forgot, didn't you?
00:04:46Of course not.
00:04:47Come on.
00:04:47Yeah, sometimes I wonder why we're friends.
00:04:49Because you like watching me while I sleep?
00:04:50One time, Ian.
00:04:52The welcome party for my two new roommates?
00:04:54You were supposed to bring the chips and dip.
00:04:55I'm sorry, Gabs.
00:04:57I'll be there in 15 minutes.
00:04:58You better.
00:05:15Wow.
00:05:16Your top looks gorgeous with your skin tone.
00:05:21Sometimes it was just too easy.
00:05:28You said 15 minutes.
00:05:30Did I say 15?
00:05:31I could have sworn I said 20.
00:05:33You smell like cheap perfume.
00:05:34Seriously, you smell bad, dude.
00:05:36Go shower.
00:05:37Okay, I'll put out the food here.
00:05:38Your extra clothes are still in my room.
00:05:39Just get rid of the skank.
00:05:41She has a name, you know, although I really couldn't read her name tag because with her
00:05:45lips wrapped around me, she was blocking the view.
00:05:47One of these days, you're going to get smited.
00:05:49Or is it smote?
00:05:50That sounds dirty.
00:05:50I can't wait to try that.
00:05:53Relax.
00:05:55Hmm?
00:05:56Hmm.
00:06:23Oh, my God.
00:06:25Oh, my God.
00:06:27Kind of had you peg for a boy shorts, girl.
00:06:33What are you doing in my room?
00:06:35You mean Gabby's room.
00:06:36I mean my room.
00:06:38And you are.
00:06:41Look, I got about three minutes before Gabby hands me my ass.
00:06:43Did you want to go on the bed?
00:06:45Or the floor, since you're already there.
00:06:47What?
00:06:48What are you talking about?
00:06:50Down to about two minutes.
00:06:51Not going to lie.
00:06:52It's going to be a little difficult, but I could probably conjure something up that
00:06:55would cause a little panting.
00:06:56Maybe a scream or two.
00:06:57A scream?
00:06:59Are you a stripper for the party?
00:07:01No.
00:07:03Come here.
00:07:03Not about ten seconds left.
00:07:05I don't even think I could perform miracles of this caliber.
00:07:09Get out of my room.
00:07:11Gabby's room?
00:07:11We switched.
00:07:13Oh.
00:07:13Yeah.
00:07:14Okay.
00:07:15So, uh, that would make Gabby's room.
00:07:19Yeah.
00:07:20Gotcha.
00:07:21You lost.
00:07:23Could have rocked your world.
00:07:24My world doesn't need rocking.
00:07:26Uh-huh.
00:07:27Every girl needs to allow the world to be rocked at least once.
00:07:32Or said rocking's coming from what?
00:07:35Sometimes twice.
00:07:39You know, well, it's a little more complicated than that, but it's not just ones and zeros.
00:07:46You know?
00:07:47Well, that's amazing.
00:07:53It's been ten minutes.
00:07:54Tell me you didn't.
00:07:56Didn't?
00:07:56What are you doing with that?
00:07:57What the hell?
00:07:58Where's Blake?
00:07:59Is she on a basketball team?
00:07:59No, where is she?
00:08:01Soccer.
00:08:01Ian, if you touched her, I swear I'll rip her golden locks from your brain one by one.
00:08:06Golf.
00:08:07Volleyball, actually.
00:08:08That explains the clothes.
00:08:10What's wrong with my clothes?
00:08:15He belonged to you?
00:08:16Unfortunately.
00:08:17You know how your parents always tell you to not feed strays?
00:08:20He was so cute at first, like all puppies.
00:08:22Then he started biting my friends.
00:08:24Love you too, boo.
00:08:27Okay, all right.
00:08:28Are we gonna do this or what?
00:08:30I have a test in the morning.
00:08:30Not yet.
00:08:31This is a welcome party for my new roommates, Serena and Blake.
00:08:34We have to socialize first.
00:08:35Come on, Gab.
00:08:36We already met the roommates.
00:08:37Ian brought food and you're still single.
00:08:39I mean, all's right in the world.
00:08:42No, no, no, no, no.
00:08:43Come on.
00:08:44Shh, shh, shh.
00:08:44Come on, man.
00:08:45Here, sit.
00:08:46Sit.
00:08:46We're all gonna watch this show and then have a little dessert.
00:08:53You should have never fed him that first treat.
00:08:56Wants me day and night, Blake.
00:08:59Day and night.
00:09:09What's up, my man?
00:09:11What's the news?
00:09:12Serena.
00:09:13Oh, okay.
00:09:14Wildcat in bed.
00:09:15Forgot my name twice.
00:09:17Asked me if I believed in unicorns.
00:09:20I was attending Comic-Con three times.
00:09:22And when I asked for her number, she cried.
00:09:25Cried?
00:09:27Damn.
00:09:28Must have been on your A game last night.
00:09:30I'm never off my game.
00:09:32So that, uh, that one time you hit on Gab's was a fluke?
00:09:35I was drunk.
00:09:37Can we please not talk about Gabby this early in the morning?
00:09:39It really messes with the rest of my day.
00:09:41Hi, dude.
00:09:42Hi.
00:09:43Your schedule's full, but a new one popped up on the site this morning, and I wasn't sure
00:09:47if you wanted me to let her reply.
00:09:50Do it.
00:09:51Look, I gotta go.
00:09:53Shell has this early morning class with douche pants, and I gotta walk her to class holding
00:09:57her books, and then, uh, kiss her on the forehead.
00:10:00Tale as old as time, my friend.
00:10:02You know it.
00:10:09Stop here.
00:10:19Did he notice?
00:10:21No, he noticed.
00:10:23Now you can give him your number.
00:10:24Don't answer the first text.
00:10:25Answer the third.
00:10:26Always the third.
00:10:28But what if he doesn't ask for it?
00:10:30Trust me, he will.
00:10:31Off you go.
00:10:36I just blazed through rules one, two, three, and four.
00:10:40Rule one, make them curious.
00:10:42Rule two, don't appear too interested.
00:10:45Rule three, give them a method of contact, but keep the ball in your court.
00:10:50Rule four, never answer the first text.
00:10:58Sorry, bro.
00:11:00You.
00:11:04Hi.
00:11:06Oh, fans of yours?
00:11:08Maybe he'll sit with us.
00:11:10Well, the club has an opening.
00:11:11They made posters last year.
00:11:14You clearly have too high of an opinion of yourself.
00:11:17Some say not high enough.
00:11:37You're going to make it?
00:11:39You're going to make it?
00:11:47Blue.
00:11:49Blue.
00:11:49What?
00:11:50Your eyes.
00:11:51They're a nice ice blue.
00:11:53I'm not interested.
00:11:56In men?
00:11:57In you.
00:11:58So stop talking.
00:11:59Thank you.
00:12:00Open your book for those who brought them to page 34.
00:12:12Oh, and just a reminder, there will be a quiz on chapter four next week.
00:12:17Thank you.
00:12:17Blake.
00:12:26It worked!
00:12:27Of course it did.
00:12:28He's going to try and get you alone.
00:12:30Don't let him.
00:12:31But...
00:12:31No, rule number five.
00:12:33You're busy.
00:12:33You are always busy, unless I say you aren't.
00:12:36Ian, you are the best!
00:12:45Interesting.
00:12:45Interesting.
00:12:53Waiting for someone?
00:12:55Yes, I am.
00:12:56And it's very important, so can you please leave?
00:13:01Forget it.
00:13:01This is a stupid idea.
00:13:03Doubt David would approve of this attitude.
00:13:06Says here that he values optimism above all things.
00:13:10What?
00:13:14Come with me.
00:13:15Let's go.
00:13:22What is this?
00:13:25Wingmen Inc.
00:13:26No, no, no.
00:13:28You've got to be kidding me.
00:13:30I'm not kidding you.
00:13:31Lex and I are the masterminds behind the fastest growing dating service in the Pacific Northwest.
00:13:34Some say I'm a modern-day superman saving women from themselves while Lex plays sidekick.
00:13:41You're welcome.
00:13:43You're such an ass.
00:13:45And I'm also your new love coach.
00:13:46That is if you're still interested.
00:13:49Look, we have a 99% success rate.
00:13:52If you follow the rules, take my guidance and advice, you'll be popping up little Davids in no time.
00:13:57What?
00:13:57Kids?
00:13:58Yeah.
00:13:59Or whatever it is you want.
00:14:01I'll get it for you.
00:14:05Can I think about it?
00:14:06Sure.
00:14:07You have one minute.
00:14:08Look, this was an impulse.
00:14:11A girl on my team, she gave me her card after I kept complaining about David, not noticing me.
00:14:16Yeah, I know.
00:14:16Megan.
00:14:16Nice girl.
00:14:1830 seconds.
00:14:21Fine.
00:14:21Good.
00:14:22Look, I don't like to candy coat or anything, so I'm going to be real honest here.
00:14:25If we're going to turn the head of the captain of the basketball team, we have a lot of work
00:14:30to do.
00:14:32But I'm the best, and we start tonight.
00:14:35Lex is going to look over the details and send you the schedule tonight.
00:14:38Okay?
00:14:39Oh, and if David tries to reach out to you at all during this process, contact me first.
00:14:43If he texts you, ignore it.
00:14:46If he calls you, you're busy with your new study partner.
00:14:48Oh.
00:14:49Is that you?
00:14:52Blake, not only am I your new study partner, from here on out, I'm your everything.
00:14:59I know you pride yourself on taking less than a week for a client to gain true love's kiss, but
00:15:05damn.
00:15:07Can't be that bad, my man.
00:15:08No, actually, it's worse.
00:15:09You're saying she's a little virgin who has never kissed a man, blushes when she hears the word sex,
00:15:14can't spell the word orgasm, and believes in love at first sight?
00:15:20Damn.
00:15:21Here's a questionnaire.
00:15:23Check out Blake's number 15.
00:15:25Number 15, all right.
00:15:26Number 15, what would you wear on a first date?
00:15:30Her answer, something comfortable like a baggy sweatshirt or a hat, because hats are mysterious.
00:15:38Number 16 is my favorite.
00:15:4016, my first kiss was.
00:15:42Her answer, hopefully it'll be great.
00:15:47Yeah, I especially like the smiley face and the heart emoji.
00:15:51I'm going to see you tonight, so I'll follow up on these.
00:15:53Did you want to finish the questionnaire or should I?
00:15:55No, no, that's all you, bro.
00:16:02Just, no.
00:16:04Yeah, no.
00:16:14How do you do that?
00:16:17Just lead girls on like that?
00:16:20Every single one of them is staring and whispering.
00:16:25One of them just took a picture.
00:16:27Two, actually.
00:16:29Yeah, but why?
00:16:30It's not like you're famous or anything.
00:16:36Are you?
00:16:39Was.
00:16:41Are you going to just leave it like that, or do you want to explain?
00:16:49Not much to explain.
00:16:50My sophomore year, I got an exemption to play pro football, and then I got injured.
00:16:59So, here I am.
00:17:04Whoa.
00:17:05What, uh, what just happened here?
00:17:07Man, that was a good practice, guys.
00:17:09Hey, let's take the spot here again.
00:17:10He's here.
00:17:13Yeah, I know.
00:17:15That's why we're here.
00:17:17He comes here every night after basketball practice.
00:17:21We're doing a little recon.
00:17:24Your file shows that you met when you were four, and, um, you guys actually took baths together.
00:17:31So, I'm just wondering what this whole, like, shy deal's about, because, uh, you know, he's seen the goods, sister.
00:17:38The goods?
00:17:39I didn't have goods when I was four.
00:17:42Well, I can't even tell if you have goods now, um, considering the baggy clothes you wear.
00:17:51Okay, can we just go before he sees us, please?
00:17:54And, and that's a bad idea.
00:17:56Why?
00:17:57Because every time I'm around him, I just, I act like a dude.
00:18:00Like I'm one of the guys, and I just want him to see me differently.
00:18:06I want him to know I have boobs.
00:18:10All right, well, like I said before, the jury's still clearly out on that one.
00:18:23Are you sniffing my hair?
00:18:25Yeah.
00:18:26Is he looking?
00:18:28No, he's eating.
00:18:30Bastard.
00:18:31God, he must be clueless.
00:18:33Uh, you know what?
00:18:34No, he needs to see you.
00:18:35Come here.
00:18:35Sir, look at me.
00:18:36Okay.
00:18:37Come here.
00:18:41Come on.
00:18:45Come on.
00:19:03Blake?
00:19:04Hey.
00:19:05Uh, sorry we didn't see you when we, when we came in.
00:19:08Yeah.
00:19:08Who's your friend?
00:19:10Name's Ian.
00:19:12Ian?
00:19:14Ian.
00:19:15How's it going, man?
00:19:16Yeah.
00:19:16Good.
00:19:17David, you should have seen this guy play.
00:19:19Yeah, let's, uh, not bore him with that.
00:19:21Nice to meet you, David.
00:19:22Yeah.
00:19:23How do you, uh, know my girl?
00:19:27Your, your girl?
00:19:29Yeah, my girl.
00:19:30Well, I didn't realize you were, uh, dating anybody.
00:19:38Oh, uh, I didn't realize you were her dad.
00:19:42Huh.
00:19:43Hell no, man.
00:19:44We know.
00:19:44We, we go way back.
00:19:46We've been friends since before we could walk, you know?
00:19:50Aw.
00:19:51That's a real cute story.
00:19:53Um, well, nice to meet you, Blake's dad.
00:19:56Kidding.
00:19:57Nice to meet you, David.
00:19:59Yeah, it's nice to meet you.
00:20:02It's good to see you, Blake.
00:20:04Me too.
00:20:05Shall we?
00:20:07Yeah.
00:20:18You okay?
00:20:19Yeah.
00:20:21Thank you.
00:20:22I think that's the first time he's ever looked at me.
00:20:25Like you have boobs.
00:20:27Exactly.
00:20:28Exactly.
00:20:36Next.
00:20:41All right, I'm gonna count to five.
00:20:42I don't think it fits.
00:20:44Okay, look, they measured you.
00:20:45It fits.
00:20:46We gotta go.
00:20:47Gabby said we got dinner at six.
00:20:50This is just too much pressure.
00:20:51I mean, how do I, how do I know if it fits?
00:20:54They're, they're boobs.
00:20:55How do I know if it looks good?
00:20:56Let's go.
00:20:57Open up before I crawl under it.
00:20:58Come on, let's go.
00:21:04Scale of one to ten?
00:21:06How awful is it?
00:21:10Like you look great.
00:21:13You sound bored.
00:21:15No, your boobs, they look good.
00:21:19Abby?
00:21:21You think?
00:21:24I'm just not good at this.
00:21:26I didn't grow up with a mom, so.
00:21:31Well, men are turned on by sight.
00:21:35Girls by touch.
00:21:36By wearing something fitting, you're guaranteeing that he won't see you as a buddy, but as a partner.
00:21:43That's what you wanted, right?
00:21:46Right.
00:21:48Well, you look good.
00:21:50I'll be eating out in your hand in no time.
00:21:53Not confident in your abilities.
00:21:55No, but I'm pretty confident in yours.
00:21:58Sir, you need to get out of the dressing room.
00:22:00We don't allow customers to play in the product before they purchase.
00:22:05Play?
00:22:06Hanky-panky.
00:22:08Oh, you mean sex.
00:22:10Sir!
00:22:11Get out.
00:22:12Stop it.
00:22:14Stop it.
00:22:15Sir!
00:22:16Just a minute.
00:22:18Get out.
00:22:18Get out.
00:22:19Sir!
00:22:20We're coming out.
00:22:20We're coming out.
00:22:21I'm going to call security.
00:22:22Oh, yeah!
00:22:28We'll take it all.
00:22:38Thank you.
00:22:52If you hurt her, I'm going to break off your favorite appendage.
00:22:59Sorry, traffic was shit.
00:23:02What's up, bud?
00:23:03Usually?
00:23:03Yep.
00:23:06Hi.
00:23:09So, uh, where's the other roomie?
00:23:12I'm here.
00:23:15You okay?
00:23:17Yep.
00:23:18Lex!
00:23:19Lex!
00:23:32So, uh, Blake, I like your new look.
00:23:35Thanks.
00:23:36It was Ian.
00:23:37He was a big help.
00:23:39It's okay, I guess.
00:23:40I mean, if you're into working out.
00:23:42Well, clearly she is.
00:23:43Look at her.
00:23:47Oh, my God!
00:23:50I'm so sorry.
00:23:52No, it's okay.
00:23:53It slipped.
00:23:54No, no, no, no.
00:23:54It's okay.
00:23:55It's okay.
00:23:55It's just workout clothes.
00:23:57I can always wash them.
00:24:01Mmm.
00:24:02That is good.
00:24:03Oh, it's fine.
00:24:04It's fine.
00:24:05I can just...
00:24:12Have you kissed her yet?
00:24:19Oh, I will take that as a no.
00:24:23She's never kissed another guy, man.
00:24:25It would be, um...
00:24:26Wrong.
00:24:27You know that.
00:24:29Wrong.
00:24:30Mm-hmm.
00:24:34Are you falling for her?
00:24:37No.
00:24:39Hell no.
00:24:41Have you seen her flip-flops?
00:24:42Jesus.
00:24:45What is our main role?
00:24:48Don't fall for clients.
00:24:51Don't fall for the clients.
00:24:57I think it's clean, bro.
00:25:01No dessert?
00:25:06Wait, can I talk to you for a second upstairs?
00:25:08Sure.
00:25:08Yeah.
00:25:11Bye.
00:25:19Uh, what's wrong?
00:25:23Hands up.
00:25:24Uh-huh.
00:25:25Yep.
00:25:25Okay, here we go.
00:25:32You're wearing a thong?
00:25:35Yeah.
00:25:36Does the stripping have a purpose?
00:25:39Stripping should always have a purpose.
00:25:41Um, we need to wash your clothes.
00:25:44And I needed help with that, or what?
00:25:46Do you have any giant hoodies in here?
00:26:02Okay, honest moment.
00:26:03Why do you, uh...
00:26:04Why do you wear clothes like this?
00:26:07Well, everybody has their own thing, right?
00:26:11What?
00:26:14Nothing.
00:26:15Um, right.
00:26:17Tomorrow, me and you, we're gonna go work out together.
00:26:20We have to get to the gym early before David,
00:26:22because we're gonna catch him by surprise.
00:26:23Adrenaline pumps when you work out,
00:26:25and hot chick's watching.
00:26:27Even better.
00:26:29You said hot chick.
00:26:31Not cute.
00:26:32You're hot.
00:26:32Trust me.
00:26:33Come here.
00:26:34So, tomorrow when he sees us, we're gonna need to flirt.
00:26:36The problem is that, uh, you flinch when I try to touch you.
00:26:40No, I don't.
00:26:42I don't.
00:26:46Okay, you see that?
00:26:48That look right there?
00:26:49Yeah.
00:26:50That really pissed-off look, it sometimes can be confused for lust.
00:26:53So, maybe I'll just piss you off the entire workout.
00:26:55That might work, but if it doesn't,
00:26:57I might need to kiss you.
00:26:59Okay?
00:27:00And if I do,
00:27:01I need to know that you're not gonna scratch my eyes out
00:27:03or get me in the balls.
00:27:05I might.
00:27:07Guess you just have to wait and find out.
00:27:08No.
00:27:10Never play a player.
00:27:12Doesn't work.
00:27:14Okay, sweet cheeks?
00:27:16Sweet cheeks?
00:27:21Sweet cheeks.
00:27:25Okay.
00:27:27I think lesson time is over.
00:27:31Yeah.
00:27:32Uh, oh, I'll be back at 4.30 to pick you up.
00:27:34For in the morning?
00:27:35Mm-hmm.
00:27:36Oh.
00:27:37Okay.
00:27:38This better work.
00:27:39It's never not worked, so, uh,
00:27:41unless you have a second thoughts.
00:27:43No.
00:27:43No, I'm not.
00:27:53Um, 4.30?
00:27:56Be ready.
00:28:06Two more.
00:28:08One more.
00:28:10One more.
00:28:12Oh.
00:28:14You tired?
00:28:15Exhausting.
00:28:16Yeah.
00:28:17I love that feeling.
00:28:18It's the best.
00:28:18What next?
00:28:19I'll stretch you out.
00:28:20Come on.
00:28:25Okay, let's, uh, warm up on the bench.
00:28:34Can you just grab some .45s?
00:28:36Let's get started.
00:28:37Stay calm.
00:28:38You're good.
00:28:39Relax.
00:28:40Ow.
00:28:42Your pain.
00:28:44It feels amazing.
00:28:50What?
00:28:54Blake?
00:28:56Oh, hey.
00:28:57Hey.
00:28:58Hey, David.
00:28:59I didn't see you there.
00:29:03Whoa.
00:29:05You look...
00:29:07exhausted?
00:29:08Yeah, Ian really knows how to work me.
00:29:13Boy, you know, if you ever...
00:29:14you ever need help with the gym,
00:29:16you can always ask me.
00:29:18Oh, thanks for the offer, but...
00:29:20David, I think I got it.
00:29:24All right.
00:29:25The offer stands.
00:29:28It's really good to see you, Blake.
00:29:30You look, uh, good.
00:29:35Thanks.
00:29:45Skip the warm-up.
00:29:46Put another one on.
00:29:57Wow.
00:30:00Oh, no.
00:30:08Sorry.
00:30:14Well, that was a really great first kiss.
00:30:20Damn it.
00:30:22I was ruining everything.
00:30:23I was her first kiss?
00:30:25Me?
00:30:26The certified man-whore?
00:30:28Not the man she was in love with?
00:30:30Can I get you guys anything else?
00:30:32I don't suppose you moonlight as a massage therapist.
00:30:35Well done.
00:30:36That line was delivered perfectly.
00:30:38No, but I am good with my hands.
00:30:41Doubtful.
00:30:42Very doubtful.
00:30:44Great.
00:30:45The sooner I finished with Chell, the sooner I could...
00:30:48What?
00:30:49Finish with Blake?
00:30:50Let's go, Chell.
00:30:52What if she doesn't want to go with you?
00:30:54The last round goes to the barista.
00:30:56Ian, I think you should go.
00:30:59Well, if...
00:31:00That's what you want, Chell.
00:31:04The last round always goes to the guy.
00:31:09Blake.
00:31:12Gabs?
00:31:14Blake?
00:31:16Oh, there you are.
00:31:17Jeez, some people are trying to sleep.
00:31:20Oh, really?
00:31:22Mmm.
00:31:24Cute hair.
00:31:26Sick, you ass.
00:31:27Oh, really?
00:31:29Jeez, you're lucky you don't have the clap from all the sex you've had.
00:31:32And you're afraid of a little cold.
00:31:34Well, yeah, I don't like germs.
00:31:36What do you want?
00:31:37Why are you here?
00:31:39Had an idea for Blake.
00:31:41She's upstairs.
00:31:43The pipe in the bathroom broke and there was water everywhere.
00:31:46I tried getting a plumber, but she said something about her friend's dad being a plumber.
00:31:51And suddenly some tall dude showed up and said he could fix it.
00:31:55You definitely need to fix the pipe.
00:31:57I can clean them, too.
00:32:00David.
00:32:02Who?
00:32:02That's your phone.
00:32:03Thank you, David.
00:32:05Let me know.
00:32:05Yeah.
00:32:06Ian.
00:32:07Oh.
00:32:08Oh, my God.
00:32:09Are you sick, too?
00:32:10I think so.
00:32:12Oh, yeah.
00:32:12Mm-hmm.
00:32:16Blake, hey, uh, uh, I'm pretty sure he's gonna be just fine.
00:32:20The last thing that you need is to get sick for the big test on Friday, right?
00:32:25Would you want to get out of here?
00:32:28We can go get some ice cream or something so you're not stuck in the sick house.
00:32:31You know, he's, uh, he's probably right.
00:32:33You shouldn't get sick.
00:32:36You know what?
00:32:37You're probably already coming down with something.
00:32:39I'm sorry, babe, if I had no one, I wouldn't put my mouth all over you like that.
00:32:46Rain check?
00:32:47I just, I don't want you to get sick before your big game.
00:32:51Yeah, yeah, that's probably a good idea.
00:32:56But you do have my number now, so, uh, so call me anytime.
00:33:01Mm-hmm.
00:33:02It's good to see you.
00:33:04You too.
00:33:11Look, if you ask to hang out, you're busy.
00:33:14You're always busy until I say you're free.
00:33:16Rule number five clearly states this.
00:33:19If he tries to call you or wants to curse into hanging out, no.
00:33:22Especially when you're with another guy.
00:33:24It makes you look easy and it makes our relationship look fake.
00:33:28Yeah.
00:33:29Okay?
00:33:29Yeah.
00:33:30Mm-hmm.
00:33:31All right, um, I'll see you girls later.
00:33:48Lex, emergency meeting right now.
00:33:50What up?
00:33:51It's, uh, it's David.
00:33:53What is this deal?
00:33:56She's moving through these steps way too fast and he's falling for it.
00:34:00Something's up with him.
00:34:01Can you bring up his file?
00:34:03Wait, you want to look at his file?
00:34:09David and Blake's compatibility.
00:34:1187% doesn't seem kind of high.
00:34:13That's high.
00:34:15Really high.
00:34:16You like her.
00:34:18Well, yeah, I also like yogurt, so.
00:34:22Gabby called.
00:34:24She's worried.
00:34:25Gabby called?
00:34:26Gabby called?
00:34:27She hates you.
00:34:30Yeah.
00:34:30She said at least ten times before finally getting to the real reason behind her phone call.
00:34:35She thinks you're hooking up with Blake.
00:34:37No.
00:34:38Not happening.
00:34:39Nor will it.
00:34:40Here.
00:34:40Go get Gabby some soup.
00:34:42She's sick.
00:34:43I'm gonna go sleep off whatever I'm coming down with.
00:34:45Oh, and hopefully not die.
00:34:48If I turn into a zombie at some point, at least take a couple good pictures for you to decapitate
00:34:52me.
00:34:52You have my word.
00:34:57You have my word.
00:34:5910, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 11, 11, 12, or 12, or 12, or 12, or 12, or 12.
00:35:20¡Ahhh!
00:35:23Hey, you're okay.
00:35:24Just a fever.
00:35:26What are you doing here?
00:35:27We don't let women or clients into the house.
00:35:30Well, I texted you
00:35:32and I called you
00:35:33and then I threatened Gabby
00:35:35who threatened Lex.
00:35:38That worried about me, huh?
00:35:40About you?
00:35:41Oh, no, no, no.
00:35:42I'm doing this for entirely selfish reasons.
00:35:44Because if I lose my love coach,
00:35:47then I lose my love.
00:35:54¿Qué es eso?
00:36:18Need to get you in the bath.
00:36:19No.
00:36:20Let's go.
00:36:21We need to get your fever down.
00:36:22Come on.
00:36:23Uh, just let me die.
00:36:31Come on.
00:36:35Never leave a man behind.
00:36:40All right.
00:36:41In the bath.
00:36:43Come on.
00:36:44Let's go.
00:36:51Oh, Jesus Christ.
00:36:53Why is it so cold?
00:36:54It is not cold.
00:36:55It just feels like that because you have a fever, which we need to get down.
00:37:03All right.
00:37:04Well, this is up there for the second worst day of my life.
00:37:06Oh, yeah.
00:37:07The one's the first.
00:37:08The day I almost died.
00:37:12I think we'll give you best friends.
00:37:15Is that right?
00:37:15Mm-hmm.
00:37:17Yeah.
00:37:17I only have two.
00:37:19Gabs and Lex.
00:37:20And, you know, I'm going to kill them off soon.
00:37:23So there's a vacancy.
00:37:24Oh.
00:37:24Well, that's good to know.
00:37:27You're going to have to cook for me, though.
00:37:28Hey, I can do that.
00:37:29I used to cook for my dad and brother all the time, so.
00:37:32But really?
00:37:33Mm-hmm.
00:37:35Is your brother as pretty as you?
00:37:37He's dead.
00:37:41Sorry.
00:37:44Dying sucks.
00:37:46Yeah.
00:37:47It really does.
00:37:52Yes.
00:37:57Hey, Blake.
00:37:59Yeah?
00:38:00Mm-hmm.
00:38:00I like you.
00:38:05I like you, too.
00:38:15Mm-hmm.
00:38:19Mm-hmm.
00:38:21Mm-hmm.
00:38:22Mm-hmm.
00:38:38Mm-hmm.
00:38:41Clearly you're feeling better.
00:38:42Mm-hmm.
00:38:43Just a little delirious.
00:38:47Oh.
00:38:48Where are we, uh, with that nurse outfit?
00:38:51There's no nurse costume.
00:38:53Um, I think you're healed, and I have to get to practice.
00:38:58Fine.
00:39:03Yeah, that, it's...
00:39:05It's morning.
00:39:06It happens.
00:39:07Yeah.
00:39:07Okay.
00:39:08That's not helping, Blake.
00:39:10Sorry.
00:39:12I'm just gonna...
00:39:13Mm-hmm.
00:39:17Sorry.
00:39:18Yeah, I just wanted to say that you need to stay in bed, and that I left you two Tylenol.
00:39:24You should take those, and I will bring you food after practice.
00:39:28Food.
00:39:29Food.
00:39:31You should probably take care of that.
00:39:34I should.
00:39:35You know, a good nurse will probably stay in.
00:39:36Help me take care of that.
00:39:38You suck.
00:39:45Hey, Lex.
00:39:50Blake.
00:39:53Hey, uh, please tell me you got food for me, too.
00:39:56I did.
00:39:57I got your favorite, I think.
00:39:59Chow mein with pork, right?
00:40:01Is that it?
00:40:05I got you soup.
00:40:15Oh, sorry.
00:40:16Is it hot?
00:40:17Yeah, it's freakishly hot.
00:40:19Sorry, I just picked it up.
00:40:20You know what?
00:40:25Can you blow?
00:40:27You want me to blow in your soup?
00:40:29Are you 12?
00:40:30Mm, shit, it's really hot.
00:40:37You blow well.
00:40:39Well, coming from you, I'll take that as the highest of compliments.
00:40:45So what are we watching?
00:41:04What's up, sweet cheeks?
00:41:14What?
00:41:14Now, what was it?
00:41:17Do you ever think that...
00:41:20that maybe what you thought you wanted isn't actually what you want anymore?
00:41:26You mean like you spend your entire life
00:41:28In pursuit of one goal
00:41:29Then all of a sudden it changes
00:41:32Yeah
00:41:33That's exactly what I mean
00:41:36Well that's life Blake
00:41:37Is that?
00:41:38That just
00:41:40Doesn't that feel so wishy washy
00:41:42To go from one thing to another
00:41:46Well that's all part of college
00:41:48Discovering yourself
00:41:49And realizing hey
00:41:51Maybe you're wearing flip flops from 1992
00:41:53Isn't as cool as I thought
00:41:54Well they're not mine you jerk
00:41:56Oh really so you just stole someone's flip flops
00:41:58Decided hey let's bring these back
00:41:59No they were my brothers
00:42:01And after he died
00:42:04I
00:42:06I don't know I just wanted to be close to him
00:42:09So you raided his closet
00:42:12Well everything smelled like him
00:42:13It was comforting
00:42:15Until you had to wash it
00:42:16Until my dad forced me to wash them
00:42:18Yes
00:42:20Well it's only been two years
00:42:22I still miss him
00:42:26Under the eye
00:42:28Car accident
00:42:31Drunk driver
00:42:35It's weird it used to
00:42:36It used to piss me off so bad
00:42:38Talking about it but
00:42:41For some reason when I started
00:42:42Wearing his clothes
00:42:43It's like
00:42:46I don't know
00:42:47It almost feels like
00:42:48Invisible armor
00:42:56Well I hate to break it to you
00:42:58But these flip flops
00:43:00Are anything but invisible
00:43:02Shut up
00:43:07Did you just lick me?
00:43:09Yeah
00:43:09First rule of kindergarten
00:43:11Did you miss that guys?
00:43:12I must have missed it
00:43:13You must have
00:43:14It wants right up there
00:43:15With fire safety
00:43:16So it's a little important
00:43:22Wow okay
00:43:23What?
00:43:24Well I told you never to play the player
00:43:25Hey I'm just following your rules
00:43:28That's all
00:43:31Sometimes I hate my rules
00:43:32Me too
00:43:34Me too
00:44:06Whoa whoa
00:44:10We're training man
00:44:10We're training
00:44:11You know we're setting up for a date
00:44:13For her and you know
00:44:13David he's moving through the steps
00:44:15So fast you know
00:44:15I figured he'd do something
00:44:17I think I got it
00:44:21Thank you Ian
00:44:22Wait wait
00:44:24Look I'm sorry
00:44:25Look I'm sorry I got carried away
00:44:27I'll help you with David
00:44:28And then hopefully we can
00:44:31Be friends
00:44:33Friends
00:44:35It's funny how words
00:44:36That are supposed to make people happy
00:44:37Kind of make you want to punch a tree
00:44:39Like Chuck Norris
00:44:40Yeah
00:44:41Friends
00:44:46Friends it is
00:44:50Hmm
00:45:08You know this isn't a sting right
00:45:09You can take your sunglasses off
00:45:11Plus we're uh
00:45:12We're indoors
00:45:14You look ridiculous
00:45:16Hey you said no eye contact
00:45:18And that happens to be very difficult for me
00:45:21So
00:45:22Sunglasses
00:45:24Dude just look at his crotch
00:45:25He'll eat that shit up
00:45:26I'm not looking
00:45:27No
00:45:27No
00:45:28Do you have any other pointers
00:45:30That don't involve me
00:45:32Staring at his
00:45:34Groin
00:45:35I think you can do better than that
00:45:37Miss nursing major
00:45:38Nope
00:45:38Not doing it
00:45:40Penis
00:45:41Shut up
00:45:43Look
00:45:44If you can't even say it
00:45:45Should you really be playing with it
00:45:46I mean
00:45:47Oh hell
00:45:48No come here
00:45:50Eventually you're gonna have to get past
00:45:51The point of being afraid
00:45:53Of your own sexuality
00:45:54Something tells me that David's
00:45:56Not super great and bad
00:45:57So you're gonna have to get
00:45:58A little bit of confidence
00:45:59So you can tell him what you want
00:46:01And what makes you think that
00:46:04I mean
00:46:05I'm a virgin
00:46:06I'm a virgin
00:46:06So I'm gonna suck
00:46:08Impossible
00:46:09Believe me
00:46:10David on the other hand
00:46:11Last girlfriend we interviewed
00:46:13Said that although he deserved an A for effort
00:46:15On multiple occasions
00:46:17She studied for a test during
00:46:19During sex?
00:46:20Mm-hmm
00:46:21That's so impersonal
00:46:23I mean shouldn't you be putting your
00:46:26Your whole mind into it?
00:46:28Your body
00:46:30Your soul
00:46:34We're getting off track
00:46:35The point is that
00:46:36You're probably gonna have to give him some direction
00:46:38And you're gonna have to say words like
00:46:40Penis
00:46:41Okay?
00:46:42The end
00:46:43Fine
00:46:45Penis
00:46:45Louder
00:46:47Penis
00:46:50Hey man, didn't see you there
00:46:52Hey
00:46:52How's it going?
00:46:56I thought y'all were more casual
00:46:58Uh, no
00:46:59We made it official last night
00:47:00Right, Sweet Cheeks?
00:47:09Sorry, yeah
00:47:10It was just
00:47:11It was a really great night
00:47:13Yeah, a great night
00:47:15Good
00:47:16Happy for you, Blake
00:47:18Really happy for you
00:47:20Yeah, we should, uh
00:47:22We should get out of here
00:47:33What?
00:47:34Why are you laughing?
00:47:35David just gave me the finger
00:47:37Really?
00:47:39That's kind of rude
00:47:39Why would he do that?
00:47:40Because his hands were free
00:47:41And mine weren't
00:47:57Nice
00:47:58I like
00:48:00Good
00:48:01Because I haven't worn them in forever
00:48:06Guys, you just gonna stand there
00:48:08And ice for each other
00:48:09Or can we get a snack?
00:48:11Be there in a sec
00:48:22All right, I am serving myself
00:48:29Perfect
00:48:34Sound for a game, boy?
00:48:36Did you just call me boy?
00:48:38I did
00:48:38You do know I played pro football
00:48:40I didn't want to have to do this
00:48:41No
00:48:43I'm pretty much good at every sport
00:48:47Except for golf
00:48:50Really?
00:48:51I'm pretty sure we established that ice skating is not a sport
00:48:54You are serving
00:48:56Let me just get comfortable real quick
00:48:59Oh, it's like that, is it?
00:49:02Sure is
00:49:03Two can play that game
00:49:10Let's go
00:49:11Ready?
00:49:12Yeah, I'm ready
00:49:12Let's go
00:49:13Are you ready?
00:49:15Oh, shit
00:49:16My money's on Blake
00:49:18Do you know he was nominated for a Heisman, right?
00:49:22Is that a hard thing to get?
00:49:34That's my girl
00:49:35That's my girl
00:49:53What happened?
00:49:55What happened?
00:49:56Are you okay?
00:49:57Yeah, yeah
00:49:57Your knee?
00:49:59Yeah
00:49:59Come on, Lex
00:50:00Let's go grab an ice pack
00:50:05I'm fine
00:50:05Come on
00:50:08Here
00:50:08Put weight on me
00:50:10Are you okay?
00:50:12Yeah, I'm fine
00:50:12I'm just, uh
00:50:14Old injury
00:50:17Prop it up
00:50:18Oh, shit
00:50:23Oh, it's starting to swell
00:50:24What happened to your knee?
00:50:26Can you keep a secret?
00:50:28Yes
00:50:29Well
00:50:33I'm Superman
00:50:34Yeah, I just
00:50:36I injured it
00:50:37Saving two old ladies
00:50:38And their cats
00:50:39He really is a hero
00:50:40And that poor little boy
00:50:41Would have died
00:50:41Can you imagine
00:50:42What that would have done
00:50:43To that father
00:50:44After losing his wife?
00:50:46He's amazing, Ian
00:50:47Don't sell yourself short
00:50:47Okay, enough
00:50:48Gaps
00:50:48We get it
00:50:49Okay
00:50:50Thank you
00:50:53Put this on it
00:50:54Come on
00:50:55Thanks
00:50:56Look, don't
00:50:57Listen to her
00:50:58I'm no hero
00:50:59Here I am
00:51:00Being bitter
00:51:00That I can't play football
00:51:01And this kid
00:51:03Could have died
00:51:05Well, you sort of did too
00:51:07I mean
00:51:07In a way
00:51:08You lost part
00:51:09Of what made you you
00:51:10You know
00:51:12I got past it
00:51:14You know
00:51:14Look, I
00:51:15I don't want you to think
00:51:16I'm one of those broken guys
00:51:17Living in the old
00:51:18Glory days of football
00:51:21How'd you get over it?
00:51:23It was the kid
00:51:25He, um
00:51:26He came and visited me
00:51:27In the hospital
00:51:28And I actually used to call him
00:51:29By his last name
00:51:30Montgomery
00:51:31Or Little Monty
00:51:32Because this kid was tiny
00:51:33And apparently
00:51:34He's still afraid of the dark
00:51:36So he brought me this bear
00:51:38Smartly named bear
00:51:41And, um
00:51:43His mom
00:51:44Unfortunately passed away
00:51:45Earlier that year
00:51:46From cancer
00:51:47And she gave him that bear
00:51:49It was supposed to be
00:51:50Like his
00:51:50Protection bear
00:51:51To make him feel safe
00:51:53And
00:51:54He gave it to me
00:51:56Said he didn't need it anymore
00:51:57Because he had me
00:52:02That bear lives the high life
00:52:03In my room
00:52:03I'll tell you that
00:52:06What about
00:52:06What about Monty?
00:52:07Where is he now?
00:52:09He's actually gonna be
00:52:09A pretty badass football player
00:52:11His dad sends me a schedule
00:52:12For his, like
00:52:13Practices and games
00:52:14And I've actually been to a few
00:52:15He's not bad
00:52:17You really are Superman
00:52:21Well, it's one person, yeah
00:52:23Or two
00:52:29Guys, you up for a movie?
00:52:33Yeah, we'll be right there
00:52:42You guys, no
00:52:43Just not happening
00:52:44Shower or no couch time
00:52:47Sure, we'll go shower
00:52:48Oh, not together
00:53:06What?
00:53:07You mean what?
00:53:22¿Puedo verlo?
00:54:04¿Puedo verlo?
00:54:23¿Puedo verlo?
00:54:26Buenas noches, Gia.
00:54:28Muy bien.
00:54:41Voy a ir a hacer un popcorno.
00:54:43¿Qué te necesitas?
00:54:45Sí, es...
00:54:46Es solo popcorno.
00:54:47Creo que voy a estar bien.
00:54:49¿Sure?
00:54:50Sí, sí.
00:54:51Estoy bien.
00:54:57¿Blaque, voy a ir a ver el filme?
00:54:59No, no, no.
00:55:04¿Algo que puedo ayudar con?
00:55:06No, no, no, no.
00:55:08Ella es tuya.
00:55:09Al menos para ahora.
00:55:11Pero escucha.
00:55:13Tenemos una historia.
00:55:14Y eso no es algo que puedes competir con.
00:55:18No ahora.
00:55:19No, nunca.
00:55:23Éxito.
00:55:24¿Qué?
00:55:24¿Cómo podemos competir con la treehouse?
00:55:26¿Qué?
00:55:27Tres una bastardsita.
00:55:31Mira.
00:55:32No, no, no.
00:55:34No, no.
00:55:35No, no.
00:55:36No, no.
00:55:36No, pero...
00:55:36No, no, no.
00:55:39No, no, no.
00:55:41No, no, no.
00:55:42No, no, no, no.
00:55:43No, no, no.
00:55:44No, no, no.
00:55:47No, no, no.
00:55:51No, no, no.
00:56:26Exactly what I thought.
00:56:29You. That's what I should have said when she asked me what I wanted.
00:56:33Instead, I opened my mouth and nothing came out.
00:56:45I hate mornings.
00:56:47Yup.
00:56:49He's freaking out.
00:56:51Use your indoor voice. Lex can hear you. Also, he hates mornings.
00:56:58David's dad bailed. It's just us. I've never been on a date.
00:57:02Shit.
00:57:04Something wrong?
00:57:06Yeah, I gotta take Blake on this fake date so she doesn't puke all over David.
00:57:15Be at the house at six. Have Gabs help you get ready. She is the boss.
00:57:23Whoop.
00:57:27I hate mornings.
00:57:32Is it already?
00:57:34I think so.
00:57:36Blake, come on.
00:57:38It can't be that bad. Let's go.
00:57:39No, it is very bad.
00:57:48Damn.
00:57:50Is it that bad?
00:57:52Yeah, it's horrific.
00:57:54How could you expect to attract a man in this monstrosity?
00:58:00Monstrosity, huh?
00:58:01Mm-hmm.
00:58:02Huh.
00:58:02Is that why you keep staring at it?
00:58:06I literally can't look away.
00:58:08Don't even think I could if I tried.
00:58:11Fake date, remember?
00:58:14This is a fake date, so I don't make a fool out of myself when I go out with David
00:58:17on Thursday.
00:58:18Okay, but the second we leave this house, you've got to pretend it's real.
00:58:22I'll coach you, and hopefully by Thursday, we'll get news of a tragic accident that David's lost all functionality of
00:58:27his penis.
00:58:30Are you sure I look okay?
00:58:34No, Blake.
00:58:36You look phenomenal.
00:58:41If that bastard doesn't say those exact words are better, he's not deserving.
00:58:47Okay?
00:58:50Shall we?
00:58:51Yes.
00:58:58Are we having a picnic or something?
00:59:00Rule number nine, Blake.
00:59:01If a guy wants to surprise the shit out of you, don't question it.
00:59:04Just tell him how awesome he is.
00:59:07Okay, well, you are awesome and the best fake date ever.
00:59:11Hey, you know what?
00:59:12We need to pretend like this is real, remember?
00:59:14Or what's the point?
00:59:16I don't know.
00:59:16Maybe a fun night?
00:59:18Some good food?
00:59:21All right.
00:59:25We're canoeing?
00:59:26Towards the restaurant, yeah.
00:59:30Okay, I have to admit to you, that is...
00:59:34It's pretty cool.
00:59:35Although I don't know how much help I'm going to be in this dress.
00:59:38Well, cross my heart.
00:59:39I won't look up your skirt.
00:59:42Rule number seven?
00:59:46Men always lie.
00:59:48Like, I don't know how much you're going to be in this dress.
00:59:50Hmm.
00:59:51Hmm.
00:59:57Hmm.
01:00:03Hmm.
01:00:11Hmm.
01:00:17¡Gracias!
01:00:44Cardio?
01:00:45Yeah, sex with David.
01:00:48Oh, I...
01:00:48I haven't really thought about that.
01:00:52Tonight's special is that...
01:00:54Can you give us a minute, please?
01:00:56Thanks.
01:00:59You know what's gonna happen eventually, right?
01:01:02Yeah, um...
01:01:04I don't know. I don't really like thinking about it,
01:01:07because...
01:01:07Well, honestly, it kind of makes me want to puke.
01:01:11No, it's just...
01:01:13I'm gonna be horrible,
01:01:14and then I'm gonna make a fool out of myself,
01:01:16and then he's gonna hate it.
01:01:18Rule number six. Guys, never
01:01:20hate sex, okay? If he's not getting
01:01:22off, it's either because he mistakenly used
01:01:24numbing gel instead of KY, or
01:01:26he's gay, and you just lack
01:01:28the goods to get him there. KY?
01:01:30You still need another minute?
01:01:33Yeah.
01:01:35If you can't even talk about
01:01:37having sex with David, I just...
01:01:39Why are you even going on a date with him?
01:01:42Like, I...
01:01:43Why are you even using my help?
01:01:44I... It's just... I don't know.
01:01:46Don't you think it's moving so fast?
01:01:49I wanted him to notice me.
01:01:51I didn't want him to take me to bed
01:01:52two weeks after your little plan worked.
01:01:56Well, then just say no.
01:01:59Rules 12, 13, and 14
01:02:01I didn't want him to take me clearly say that you can
01:02:05absolutely say no.
01:02:09So how did you get into this?
01:02:11How'd you start Wingman?
01:02:16Actually, it was my sister.
01:02:19She was, um,
01:02:21at the time, crushing really hard on this guy
01:02:23from my team, and when I say hard,
01:02:25I mean, she drove her car into a mailbox
01:02:28when we had him over for 4th of July.
01:02:31The sad thing is, is...
01:02:33he was into her, too.
01:02:36But she was always so shy and insecure
01:02:39to ever meet him halfway,
01:02:40and I was always just too selfish to give a shit,
01:02:43so...
01:02:44she settled.
01:02:45She settled for a guy who thinks
01:02:47that video games are like the Olympics.
01:02:50So there's two types of settling.
01:02:53There's a type that is cute.
01:02:56A match made in heaven
01:02:57where you look at a couple holding hands in public
01:02:59and you think,
01:03:01is that girl legally blind?
01:03:04And then there's the other type of settling,
01:03:05which is the insecure type.
01:03:08Where a girl never reaches her full potential
01:03:10and settles for someone, you know,
01:03:14less than she's worth.
01:03:17My sister deserved better.
01:03:19And if she had just an ounce of confidence,
01:03:22it would have changed her life.
01:03:24Hell, if she even had one rule for my playbook,
01:03:26it would have changed her life.
01:03:30Well, then...
01:03:31to the playbook.
01:03:33To the playbook.
01:03:40Okay.
01:03:41The final rule.
01:03:42If you're feeling like the date's going good
01:03:44and you want to continue,
01:03:46it's up to you to invite them in.
01:03:49Okay.
01:03:53Ian?
01:03:55Yeah?
01:03:56Do you want to come in?
01:04:01Well...
01:04:02It depends.
01:04:04On what?
01:04:05Do you have refreshments?
01:04:06You can't just invite someone in,
01:04:08expecting something to happen.
01:04:09You have to have coffee, drink, late night movie.
01:04:13It's kind of an unwritten rule.
01:04:14No.
01:04:19All of the above.
01:04:21How's that?
01:04:24I accept.
01:04:50Screw David.
01:04:51You're mine.
01:04:55Mr.
01:05:04No, no, no.
01:05:26No, no.
01:05:58No, no.
01:06:51No, no.
01:06:58No, no.
01:07:13No, no.
01:07:30No, no.
01:07:33No, no.
01:07:35No, no.
01:07:38No, no.
01:07:39No, no.
01:07:44No, no.
01:07:49No, no.
01:07:55No, no.
01:08:09No, no.
01:08:34No, no.
01:08:36No, no.
01:08:40No, no.
01:08:44No, no.
01:09:02No, no.
01:09:14No, no.
01:09:29No, no, no.
01:10:14No, no, no.
01:10:18No.
01:10:19No, no.
01:10:33No, no.
01:10:48No, no.
01:10:55No, no.
01:10:58No, no.
01:11:29No, no, no.
01:11:29No, no.
01:11:35No, no.
01:11:36No, no.
01:11:38No, no, no.
01:12:10No, no, no.
01:12:12No, no, no.
01:12:17No, no, no.
01:12:17No, no, no.
01:12:45No, no, no, no.
01:13:03No, no, no.
01:13:12No, no, no, no, no.
01:13:46No, no, no, no.
01:13:51No, no, no, no.
01:14:05No, no, no, no, no.
01:14:35No, no, no, no, no.
01:15:34No, no, no.
01:15:37No, no, no, no.
01:15:43No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:16:33No, no, no, no, no, no.
01:16:38No, no, no, no, no.
01:16:44No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:17:21No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
01:17:30no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
01:17:30no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
01:17:37no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
01:17:40no, no, no.
01:17:57No, no, no, no, no, no.
01:18:14Your boyfriend's waiting.
01:18:16No, my boyfriend is standing right in front of me.
01:18:18Not anymore.
01:18:22Ian.
01:18:23Be happy, okay?
01:18:24Hey, Ian. Good to see you, buddy.
01:18:27How are you?
01:18:30I'm out of here.
01:18:31And David, treat her right.
01:18:34Oh, I certainly will, just like I did last night.
01:18:36What?
01:18:37Ian, Ian, stop it.
01:18:38Disrespect I got to get it and I'll kill you.
01:18:40Dude, it was a joke.
01:18:42I'm kidding, and you have said the same stuff.
01:18:45You said the same...
01:18:46Babe!
01:18:51Ian.
01:18:53Ian, wait.
01:18:54Please let me talk.
01:18:55Wait, please.
01:18:58Look, I only kissed David to make sure of my feelings,
01:19:01and it felt wrong and horrible,
01:19:04and it just confirmed to me that I love you.
01:19:07That before or after, you screwed them.
01:19:10Are you kidding me?
01:19:12How does it go from kissing to sex?
01:19:15I basically walked you through the steps, Blake.
01:19:22Are we done?
01:19:25So done.
01:19:47I know what you're thinking.
01:19:49I played this all wrong.
01:19:52I should call her.
01:19:54No.
01:19:55She kissed David.
01:19:57He's the right fit for her.
01:20:00I won't call her.
01:20:03But I miss her.
01:20:06Fuck it.
01:20:07I'll text her.
01:20:09I miss you.
01:20:12You rejected me when I said I love you.
01:20:14Go to hell.
01:20:16Smiley face.
01:20:16A smiley face?
01:20:18Well, a smiley face means that there's still hope, right?
01:20:21But we all know a smiley face does not mean I want to have sex with you.
01:20:26Sometimes a smiley face just means I'm happy.
01:20:29But that means she was happy for me to go to hell, or just...
01:20:33happy.
01:20:35Get up.
01:20:37Stop moping around.
01:20:38Look, I love you like a brother.
01:20:39This compatibility report is ruining your life.
01:20:43It says I'd break her heart in two months, and David, on the other hand, she'd be in total bliss.
01:20:49Yeah.
01:20:49Well, I may have tweaked the numbers a bit.
01:20:55Lex, what did you do?
01:20:56What I had to.
01:20:58Do you remember when we first started Wingman?
01:20:59The oath we both took.
01:21:03Oh.
01:21:05Never fall in love.
01:21:08And what on that same drunken evening?
01:21:09What did you make me swear to you?
01:21:13Yeah, you won't let me.
01:21:15Mm-hmm.
01:21:16And why is that?
01:21:20Because I'm sick of losing shit.
01:21:23Yeah.
01:21:26Man, you're supposed to have my back.
01:21:31So I did.
01:21:33I changed the numbers, man.
01:21:34Just a little.
01:21:35But enough for you to bail.
01:21:37Don't you get it?
01:21:37It doesn't matter.
01:21:38The numbers can be manipulated, but the heart can't.
01:21:45Damn poet.
01:21:47So you get so much ass.
01:21:51I know where David's partying tonight.
01:21:54And word on the street is, he's at it alone while Gab sings out with Blake.
01:21:58Care for a drink?
01:21:59What?
01:22:01Yeah, I wish Mr. Goody Two-Shoes.
01:22:03Oh, look, a butterfly.
01:22:04Let's hug a tree.
01:22:05It's actually as bad as I wish he was.
01:22:08Oh, if that were the case, yeah.
01:22:09But it's not.
01:22:11Remember one of the most important stats?
01:22:14Guys typically mess up within two weeks of a new relationship.
01:22:17And why is that?
01:22:19God complex.
01:22:20God complex.
01:22:22Translation?
01:22:23I stole a sexy piece of ass from Ian Hunter so I can get any chick that I want.
01:22:28So come hither, my pretties, while I show you what a real man can do.
01:22:32You silver-tongued devil.
01:22:34Get your shit together.
01:22:35You leave him 15.
01:23:03I'm downtown and you need a ride.
01:23:05Is it normal to see Pinocchio after doing shrooms?
01:23:12I'll be right there.
01:23:14And just like that, I'm back in the game.
01:23:25You don't look high as a kite.
01:23:27Did you want to go get a drink?
01:23:28No, I don't want to get a drink.
01:23:30You do realize the last time I saw you, you almost killed David and somehow simultaneously broke my heart
01:23:35in the process.
01:23:36And now you're just going to call me drunk and ask...
01:23:39I'm not drunk.
01:23:40Okay?
01:23:42I have a confession to make.
01:23:43And I know it's not particularly romantic, but...
01:23:46I love you.
01:23:50Did you really just throw out an I love you?
01:23:54While high?
01:23:56Well, I lied about being high.
01:23:58And yeah, I did, because it's true.
01:24:03I've fallen ass over heels in love with you.
01:24:07I desperately want you.
01:24:09I...
01:24:10No, I need you.
01:24:11I fucking crave you.
01:24:13I was scared.
01:24:15You're scared?
01:24:16Yeah.
01:24:17Ian Hunter is scared.
01:24:18I'm scared that you'd be settling for me when David is the one you wanted all along.
01:24:23You know that I would be settling with him.
01:24:26Ian, I wouldn't be settling with you.
01:24:29You know that.
01:24:35I promise you this.
01:24:37It will only ever be you, Blake.
01:24:41You're the only person I want to wake up with.
01:24:43The only person I want to spend my nights with.
01:24:46I love you.
01:24:51I love you.
01:24:55Just kiss him already.
01:24:56Yeah.
01:25:07So this is the part of the story where we cheer to new beginnings and lots of happy endings.
01:25:11And while I pride myself for the success of Wingman Inc., I've learned firsthand that sometimes...
01:25:17Are you talking in voiceover again?
01:25:19Sure was, sweet cheeks.
01:25:20Do you, um...
01:25:22Do you mind?
01:25:24As I was saying, sometimes you just need to forget all the rules and just follow your heart.
01:25:29Oh.
01:25:30Oh.
01:25:30That's too bad.
01:25:32You know, I was really hoping we could do rule number 18 again.
01:25:40All right, let's go.
01:25:42Ian!
01:25:47Did Ian talk to you?
01:25:49He talks to me every day.
01:25:51You need to be more specific.
01:25:52Now that he's with Blake, he wants to limit his wingman work and said I could work with you guys.
01:25:58Not a chance to know.
01:26:00Oh.
01:26:02There's a chance.
01:26:06Yeah, a chance he'll poison my lucky charms and we'll kill each other.
01:26:12Got him!
01:26:20If you were an ocean, I'd dive in and grab some sand.
01:26:26Come up for a deep breath, hold it and take your wave again.
01:26:32If you were a jazz song, I'd scout along to be a part of your song.
01:26:38Play all night with you and we'd be in the groove.
01:26:42Every time I see you, I just freeze.
01:26:45Quietly my world turns upside down.
01:26:48I'm falling in and I can barely breathe.
01:26:50I don't know what to do when you're around.
01:26:53Just want to get close to you.
01:26:55And I would know what to do.
01:26:58Just want to get close to you.
01:27:01And I would know what to do.
01:27:03If you were a swoon shot, a whiskey, I'd drink you down.
01:27:09Sip you so slowly, then have another round.
01:27:14If you were so dense, I'd learn you.
01:27:17Dip you and turn you.
01:27:20Master every move.
01:27:22Then I'd be next to you.
01:27:25Every time I see you, I just freeze.
01:27:27Quietly my world turns upside down.
01:27:29I'm falling in and I can barely breathe.
01:27:32I don't know what to do when you're around.
01:27:35Just want to get close to you.
01:27:38And I would know what to do.
01:27:40Just want to get close to you.
01:27:43And I would know what to do.
01:27:46If you were so lovely, high above me.
01:27:49Everything I'm looking for, thinking about you more and more.
01:27:52Love me.
01:27:52Would you love me?
01:27:54How can I know I can't be sure?
01:27:56Because every time I see you, I just freeze.
01:27:59Quietly my world turns upside down.
01:28:01I'm falling in and I can barely breathe.
01:28:04I don't know what to do when you're around.
01:28:07Just want to get close to you.
01:28:09And I don't know what to do.
01:28:12Just want to get close to you.
01:28:14Just want to get close to you.
01:28:17Just want to get close to you.
01:28:20And I don't know what to do.
01:28:22Just want to get close to you.
01:28:24Just want to get close to you.
01:28:52Just want to get close to you.
01:28:54Just want to get close to you.
01:28:56Just want to get close to you.
01:29:24Gracias.
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